Original subtitles

That right kidney is definitely smaller.

Why?

Could be a significant vascular lesion.

I better schedule him for angio.

No, I meant, why are you sending Elliot and me to California?

Conference on primary care techniques.

Oliver London was supposed to go, but he canceled out.

Something about his airplane being on the Fritz, and he won't fly commercial.

Beverly Royale Hotel.

Isaac Barton was supposed to go, but he can't leave either.

He's passing a kidney stone.

Olympic-sized pool.

I know 36 hours isn't very much notice.

No, no, I'm your guy.

I think it's important that St. Eligius keep up with the new care techniques.

Yes, sir.

Now, I'm expecting a full written report from your people when you get back.

Sure.

Dr. Westphall, I know you and I have had our troubles lately.

Well, I want to thank you for the vote of confidence.

We pulled your names out of a hat.

Excuse me, sir.

I'm sorry I'm late.

I got involved in a consult and just... Well, Susie Larkin down the county has your plane tickets in per diem.

Okay.

Oh, Elliot.

Yes, sir.

This is Byam Stevens' phone number.

He's my roommate in med school.

First in the class and one hell of a poker player.

Give him this package, will you?

Will do.

Safe trip.

We'll try.

Thank you very much, sir.

Where are we going?

Paradise.

Don't worry, Pete.

I'm not hurting your dad.

Now, any word on Pete's kidnappers yet?

Nope.

Police found Pete near the common.

The guy just left him there all alone.

Pediatrician says Pete's fine.

No evidence of molestation.

Oh, that's good.

Okay, here we go.

Okay, let me just try to pull this apart.

Hold on now.

Oh, it stinks, doesn't it?

Okay, nice and easy.

Nice and easy.

You're going to need to start physical therapy right away.

Whoa.

Lilacs are in bloom.

Second year of residency is almost over.

Third year is safely off in the distance, assuming we don't get cut.

What do you mean?

Everybody continues in the third year.

Check the bulletin board.

Internal medicine and surgery are dropping three people each.

Oh, man.

I only made it this far because Wendy Armstrong died at the end of first year and her place opened up.

What am I going to do if I get cut?

Marry well?

Great.

Where's Pete?

Pete?

Pete?

Where is he?

Pete?

We hit the urinal today and the whiz was the color of the chart.

I'm tired.

I feel like hell.

Knee hurt, too?

Yeah, only when I walk.

Cheap shot, deep back, clipped me.

75, blue-gray game.

Yeah.

What do you do for a living?

Football.

I'm an offensive guard.

Had a tryout with the Patriots this morning.

You look a little jaundiced.

Any recent exposure to hepatitis?

Not that I know of, no.

Fever?

Any pain?

Nope.

Use any inject able drugs?

Double shot.

Cortisone in the knee before the games.

Maybe a little crank now and then, but DACA ain't no doper.

Nobody said you were.

If you were the Patriots, how come they didn't send you to the team doctor?

Didn't say I was with the Patriots.

I was trying out with them.

They say teams have a tendency to let me go.

I spend the off season trying to hook on with a new one.

You know, if word got out I was sick, I'd be NFL history.

That's why I came to this dump.

I heard it's low profile.

Got any lower, we'd be mining coal.

Never played football.

You're kidding me.

Mr. Donald, order for the floor, nurse's station.

Mr. Donald.

Now who do you belong to, huh?

Hey!

Hey!

Leave my son alone.

No problem.

Don't you ever do that again, you understand me?

Look, you understand me?

Come on.

Trouble?

I can't get the admissions list.

Uh, hit the return key hard twice quickly.

Used to stick.

Huh, thanks.

Sure.

Any donuts?

No, we must be out.

Ah, always hit a few.

You seem to know your way around.

I used to work here years ago.

You bet.

You.

Always wondered why you said that.

Wait a minute.

Grace.

What the hell?

What's going on?

Well, Miss Jane Pauly says solar power is the wave of the future.

And Willard says it's going to rain.

But he's still wearing a dress, so I don't know if he was kidding.

I could hear the baby crying all the way from the shower.

Barbara, shh, shh, shh.

Good to let him cry.

Brings the phlegm up out of the pores.

Raised all my boys that way.

Yes, and isn't it nice you can visit them all in the same place every third Sunday?

Where's the coffee?

I didn't make any today.

Today?

It didn't seem worth the grind.

Ellen, this is all your fault.

I asked you to hire from the employment agency, not the parole board.

Morning, Grace.

She can't cook, she doesn't do the dusting, and she neglects the baby.

Enough is enough.

If you're terminating my service, I'm entitled to two weeks' severance pay.

When I tell my son Hap how I've been treated.

Watch the roads, Grace.

They're slick.

Now what do I do?

Every nanny I've had... You've hired, you've fired.

Yeah, well, we'll just have to fend for ourselves, hmm?

Now, uh, don't forget to get my shirts at Ling Hop's.

And be sure you check them this time, hmm?

The man's abacus is a bead short.

I'm gonna be late for surgery.

I'll see you later at the hospital.

My support group meets today.

Maybe afterwards we can have some lunch.

Yeah, well, we'll see.

Kiss goodbye?

Right.

Bye.

We shouldn't have cashed in our business class tickets for coach.

You're right, there's less room, but it's more spending money for universal

tours and dinner after Carson and a rental car.

Well, this conference schedule looks pretty hectic.

Outpatient approach to lymphadenopathy, the ins and outs of pruritus ani.

Maybe we should save the tar pits in Disneyland for tomorrow and just head right out to the beach.

Now, this looks interesting.

Flexible sigmoidoscopy with mannequins.

Would you like to trade seats?

Well, I prefer the aisle.

We're going to L.A.

We should check out the scene.

Rome, there's the city.

I bet you Paris is a fun town.

But what's Los Angeles contributed to the world's culture besides serial killers and herbal life?

How long do I have to stay here?

Well, we've got to take some x-rays and get some neurological tests.

It'll be a day, maybe two.

Just so his arm doesn't bother him for the league championships next week.

Yeah, plus Dad hates doing my paper out.

Neighbors' dogs don't like me.

League championships and what?

Basketball.

Gee, I wish I was as tall as you.

In football, I play quarterback.

In baseball, catcher.

In basketball, I'm forward.

Our son's quite an athlete.

Chicago Bears.

Gary Fensick's my favorite.

Well, he rang my bell a few times.

You know him?

I played against him once or twice.

Are you John Spagnola?

No, I'm John Korzynski.

You ever heard of me?

No.

I didn't think so.

Wow, did you see the size of this one?

Sir, I understand you're sending two residents to California.

Just like you don't know, I'd love the chance to see the old stomping grounds.

Consider me one step forward.

No, you're too late, Ehrlich.

Dr. Chandler, let's get on with this next patient.

Yeah, uh, white male, 56, 420 pounds, presented with fever, right CVA tendinous,

UA consistent with pyelonephritis, placed on antibiotics, pending results of urine culture.

Now, what's the antibiotic of choice here?

Anybody?

In a, uh, in a, in a, in a, in a, in a, in a, in a, in a, in a, in a,

in a, in a, in a, a first episode of pyelonephritis without underlying disease.

A broad spectrum penicillin is indicated.

Who's the eager beaver?

Some med student.

Jari, how you doing?

Everybody's bothering me.

I'm tired.

My back hurts.

Could I see the chart, please?

Well, Mr. Jari, we'd like to see that fever drop, and we're going to run a few more tests, so you just relax for now.

Donald.

They're taking vitals every four hours and giving meds every three.

That's only one to two hours in between interruptions.

No wonder Mr. Jarry's edgy.

All right, Dr. Chandler, let's change the patient's schedule, give him more time alone so he can rest, huh?

Mr. Jarry, you have a nice day, okay?

Try, anyway.

Here, thanks.

Who the hell is she?

You got me.

Is it?

Three hours ahead.

Head or behind, I can never remember.

Depends on where you started.

I guess so.

Need a barf bag?

No.

Your regular heartbeat, possible PVCs.

Stewardess, get oxygen.

We're doctors.

Yes, sir.

Nitro glycerin.

Sir, are you having chest pain?

Yes.

There's an oxygen bottle around here someplace.

Great.

While you're searching, this man's losing altitude.

Okay, what about those masks that drop down when the plane loses pressure?

Those are just for emergencies.

Well, what the hell do you call this?

Ladies and gentlemen, this is the captain.

Just breathe.

Oh, no.

Already I know that line.

Please extinguish all your smoking.

Thank you.

The well-equipped examination room.

An overview.

To the patient, your examination room can be a supportive, healing environment or a chamber of horrors.

Let's cruise.

Are you kidding?

We can't just get up and walk out.

Besides, Westphall wants us to write a report when we get back.

It's the worst thing that can happen.

We write a bad report, we get yelled at, and the next time Westphall sends somebody else, if he even reads it.

Meanwhile, we're missing peak tanning hours.

Let's begin by looking at some anxiety-producing instruments that should be kept out of sight in your exam room.

Lights, please.

Look.

This is only the first lecture.

No big deal.

We'll come back in an hour for the next.

So let's get down to the vaginal speculum, the sigmoidoscope, the a no scope,

and rubber gloves.

Hi, Jack.

What can I do for you?

I got a patient, a 10-year-old, into sports.

Phil Chandler's got another patient, a football player.

I wanted permission to move Tim out of pediatrics and put them together.

Did you check it out with Phil?

Yeah.

Sports is this kid's life.

I thought he'd like to roam with a pro athlete.

Okay, fine.

Good.

How you doing, Pete?

Yeah, sir.

I thought you'd have him back in daycare by now.

I don't want him out of my sight.

Look, Jack, we all have kids and we're all protective of him.

After what's happened to you, I can certainly understand your concern,

but you can't drag little Pete into all the patient's room.

I can't go through that again.

No, he'll be okay.

Novino.

Yeah?

Have you heard of the trickle-down theory?

Yes.

Then you can waste your time rearranging that fat man's med schedule.

But he's not my patient.

He is now.

You see, I'm the doctor, you're the medical student.

You make more work for me, so I'm making more work for you.

Trickle down.

I'm also going to be looking over your shoulder on the Kaczynski case.

The lab report should be ready.

Pick them up.

I can't get to the lab right now.

Carrie, what's been going on with you?

My son, Rocky, passed away a month ago.

You told us that last week.

Now, let's try and move a little further here, shall we?

Of leukemia.

That's it?

Anybody else?

Well, I'm glad we released all that pain in an open, supportive atmosphere.

I don't think your sarcasm is going to help very much, Dr. Weiss.

My God, we've been meeting for weeks, and you four act like this is a bridge tournament.

If I'd lost a child, I'd be screaming my lungs out.

Like that one in your arms.

I'd be in such agony, I'd want the world to know.

I do my crying alone.

Why?

Don't you think anybody else cares?

I know people care.

It's just... Just what?

Just easier to sit there quietly and let the hurt eat you up inside?

Can't you make that baby shut up?

Excuse me, I'm sorry.

Dr. Weiss, I'm sorry.

I'll just take her out in the home.

Gabby, hi.

Carol Novino.

Yeah, back again.

Med student this time, serving my clerkship.

Listen, could you do something for me?

Could you get the Krasinski labs to third for me?

I know I'm supposed to pick them up, but if you could hand them to an orderly, that would be really great.

Thanks, Gabby.

Okay, bye.

I don't know if he tricks Chandler, does he?

Do what the eye needs.

What are those?

Oh, ankle weights.

The only exercise I can get.

Keeps the thigh.

Keeps the thighs under control.

You know, I meant to keep in touch with you after you left.

Me too.

I was just so busy.

Seeing you again makes me realize how much I missed you.

The last we used to have.

Oh, look.

Mrs. Discus, is Trace back yet?

No, not yet.

My fault, my fault.

I haven't picked them up yet.

Sorry.

We need the film soon.

Sorry, I didn't meet you last night.

I'm Jackie Wade.

Carol Novino.

Hi.

Carol was foreigners here for seven years before she skipped off to med school.

Oh, that explains calling Dr. Westphall Donald on a round.

Have it.

We're all friends.

In fact, he's the one who encouraged me to become a doctor.

Oh, medicine's so challenging.

I don't know why I didn't do it before, but there was no support for ambition when I was growing up.

Women became nurses or moms.

So I was steered wrong, that's all.

I'm both.

Where does that leave me?

Well, nursing wasn't bad, but... It's boring.

You take a ton of grief.

Nobody recognizes your true value.

But it beats being a med student any day.

Well, I'm busy.

Good work to you.

If the defense is in a 3-4 and the corner back's showing blitz from the

outside, should the QB audible and throw a screen or run to the opposite side?

That depends.

On what?

On lots of things.

Want another magazine?

I got sporting news.

Are you here because you got hurt playing?

No.

Me neither.

I've never been hurt.

They don't know what's wrong with my arm.

That's about time.

You finally found out?

Do you have a problem?

Come on, hop in bed.

Well, you don't have hepatitis.

So when do I go home?

Well, a liver function abnormality such as yours suggests a few possibilities.

Hepatobiliary disease such as biliary cirrhosis, colodocal at hi as is, or the toxic effect of some drug.

I'm clean.

Mr. Krasinski, one cause of liver trouble, especially in athletes, can be the use of anabolic steroids.

I, um, took the Liberty of ordering some tests.

Must be taking a lot.

You ever try a trap buck on a 250-pound linebacker?

Need every edge I can get.

Yeah, well, the increase in body weight results from salt and water retention caused by the drug.

Yeah, well, I'll take the pounds any way they come.

On top of it all, you could be killing yourself.

Besides testicular atrophy, decreased sperm production, and high blood pressure,

you're running the risk of tumors and liver failure.

You just leave me alone.

Mr. Krasinski, please.

Spike it.

I'm terribly sorry.

Mark.

Not now, Ellen.

I'm on my way to a consult.

Well, I don't care.

You're crying out loud.

The baby's crying out loud.

Can't you quiet her down?

Here, you do it.

Oh, I...

Hey.

What's the matter, little girl?

Hmm?

Cute E.

Pie.

Hip one.

Wayne, we've been stuck in traffic for an hour and a half.

We already missed the seminar on eructation, barbarygmy, and flatus.

My Z car.

I love these license plates.

Look, it's Cary Grant.

In a beat-up Studebaker.

I guess not.

What's that one say?

Nonderwear?

No underwear.

Did somebody pay good money to put that on their bumper?

I think it's kind of neat.

We better head back.

What's next on the conference schedule?

Proper use of third generation cephalosporins given by a Dr.

Jobel of Mayo's.

Hold the Mayo.

Let's hit Venice.

But Wayne... We'll copy the lecture reprint.

Gee, the girl in the Mustang smiled at me.

Elliot.

She threw me a kiss!

That's not a girl.

Oh my God.

Wasn't that our exit?

This little piggy went to market.

What do you mean you won't tell me?

This little piggy stayed home.

I have a patient upstairs in pain.

She's got gas.

She'll survive.

This little piggy had men.

That's disgusting.

Would you get your feet off the table, please?

This is the doctor's lounge, not the med student's lounge.

Ehrlich, that is disgusting.

Get them off, please.

I have had a long day, and it's only half over.

Now, are you going to tell me the possible side effects of D'Lanton or not?

Look, you don't have the time, I don't have the time, Morris Day doesn't

have the time, and I don't have any to waste on spoon-feeding you.

Check it out in the textbook.

Oh, yeah, and another thing.

The next time you decide to lecture one of my patients on the evils of steroids, do give me a call first, okay?

Thank you.

Why are you all treating me so rotten?

Because, because I'm older than you?

Because I used to be a nurse?

Because of my smell?

What?

Rotten treatment is a time-honored medical tradition.

This is a way empty-head med students become free-thinking doctors.

Do you really believe that?

Only because I'm on this side of the barbed wire.

Carol, I've been looking all over for you.

What?

What, you want me to dress a wound, start an IV?

I know, take it, you're into the lab.

I know my face is lowest on the totem pole, I'll do anything you command, but I don't have to like it.

I was going to ask you to lunch.

Jackie, would, uh, would you, would you take, would you look at this?

Arm.

Kids.

Hi, cutie.

That's a good one.

That's it?

The last X-ray I read for you was your knee film.

You didn't trust my opinion.

I was nervous.

You were a total yo-yo.

My husband does the same thing.

He thinks I overreact in most situations, only he's much louder.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

Would you look at the X-ray?

It's an active boy.

He's got unexplained pain in the right arm.

I don't see a fracture.

Right here.

Lesion.

And the distoma.

Could be a cyst.

Or a tumor.

I already had a biopsy.

Then what did you ask me for?

Cooperation.

Half of you makes the decision, the other half second guesses.

Trust your instincts.

Right, right, right, right.

But you agree with the biopsy?

Yes!

How old did you say the boy was?

Ten.

Here I am criticizing you.

And this kid may lose his arm.

The trick is to try to keep your center of gravity low.

Is this low enough for you?

Why don't we try and skate down to the pier and back?

Please.

Come on.

Just push with your back foot and steer with your lead.

I said push.

I am pushing.

No.

Push.

Push in the pier.

Push.

Push.

You're hopeless.

I only want to practice medicine.

I was never meant to be on wheels.

Did you call Westphall's for me?

No, I forgot.

I'll do it.

Give me a number.

Here.

You know, we've missed four lectures already.

You know, Elliot, you're a lousy person to travel with.

I need another 20 cents.

You know, I like having fun.

I just feel bad about missing the conference.

Bye, go.

Bye, go, go.

Bye.

I'm sorry, sir.

That will never, ever happen again.

The stiffer you are, the easier you break.

Dr. Stevens?

Yeah, this is Wayne Fiscus from St. Eligius Hospital in Boston.

Dr. Westphall asked me to call when I got to town.

Elliot?

Oh, that party!

That party over here!

You want me to take a look at that?

I'm a doctor.

Well, okay.

Elliot?

What.

Are those?

Discharge papers.

That's just great.

You tell me I'm dying, then you point me to the door.

Come on, fix me up.

Nothing I can do.

Stop taking steroids.

And quit playing football.

The drug's only giving you a psychological boost.

It's all state of mind.

Listen, I'm two steps slow and 20 pounds light.

I got one move that everybody in three leagues knows that I get away with just enough to play the game most Sundays.

Usually from the bench and never on the same team.

For me, state of mind is more important than my body.

Elementary school.

Felt great to put on a field hockey uniform for the first time and smack all the other Catholic girls in the shins.

Of course, then I heard you had to practice, and so I said forget that.

But the feeling never left.

I ain't gonna be no name if that dream got sacked a long time ago.

It wasn't fun.

Then why are you still playing?

You know what?

I'm majoring in college.

Administrative science.

Tell me what that is and we'll both know.

I was on a football scholarship.

Lived in a football dorm.

Aided a football table.

Football, football, football.

Now, I hate the damn game.

But I got nothing else.

Don't know how to do nothing else.

No options.

Live or die, up to gut.

Seems like you're sacrificing a lot to avoid making a change.

Just trying to make a pension, lady.

Donald, Mark.

Ah, Novino.

Fine job on Mrs. Liska this morning.

Thanks.

Your first day, you almost kill a patient.

What, she had abdominal pain?

She has an aortic aneurysm.

Under the knife right now.

Resident in charge said you never got the x-rays read.

I was on my way.

That aneurysm could have ruptured and killed the woman.

Luckily, somebody else caught it in time.

I'm sorry.

Can the apology.

Abdominal distress should be treated as an emergency.

You know, any nurse can diagnose pain.

You want to play doctor, you better start assuming the responsibility of making decisions.

You got that?

Yes, sir.

You know, Mark always respected your nursing capabilities.

Sometimes it's difficult to change the image.

People have of us.

Doesn't that need a pep talk?

Do you have a minute?

No, I'm on my way to a M&M meeting.

Maybe later?

You know, you're right.

Venice was kind of fun.

L.A.

Kind of grows on you, you know?

Like mold.

I was cornered by some wacko selling potholders made out of real human hair.

Tried to convince me Charles Manson is a political prisoner.

Look!

Is that Lucille Ball?

I don't think Lucy works for UPS.

Hi, boys.

Byam Stevens.

Wayne Fiscus, Elliot Axelrod.

Hi, nice to meet you.

How do you do?

How's the conference going?

Oh, it's informative.

It's very interesting.

Skipped it, huh?

Donald and I did that in New York once.

Hit every bebop club from Birdland to Jimmy's.

Investigated what the bands were smoking.

Take a swim if you want.

Your pH is perfect.

Oh, well, no thanks.

Dr. Westphall sent this for you.

Thank you.

Let's take a seat.

I need some iced tea and sangria for our guests.

How long you in town?

Well, we're catching the red-eye out tomorrow.

Yeah, we'd really hate to leave.

I know what you mean.

I was on my way from Korea.

Changed trains here in L.A.

A sun out, a wind was blowing, there was snow on the mountains.

A clean, well-lighted place I never left.

Well, he left for a few months.

He did some refugee work in Ethiopia.

Well, he's back at the helm now.

He's trying to start a community outreach program.

He wants to get a family clinic off the ground.

Taking himself too seriously, in other words.

Dr. Westphall's taught us the importance of getting involved in community service.

Nothing wrong with trying to change the world, but you have to start by changing yourself.

Being a doctor is always the most important thing in the world, Adon.

Even more important than his family.

I've always thought there was more to life than trying my hand at a book here.

It's probably lousy.

It doesn't matter.

So, uh, you're an oncologist, huh?

Three days a week.

Yes.

Fifteen minutes.

Bye.

Gotta hit the office.

We'll let you get dressed.

I already am.

Enjoy.

And give my best to Donald.

Some adrenal insufficiency.

Morrison?

Yep.

Morrison, there are two people sitting in my office inquiring about their son.

Perry.

That's all right, baby.

I don't know what they're talking about.

Tim Perry, 10 years old.

I sent you the file.

What the hell for?

The parents have to be told his son has bone cancer in his arm.

So tell them.

Well, I thought it would help with the chief of surgery.

Morrison, the boy is your patient.

Now get in there.

I thought I'd arranged to have Tim started on radiation.

Proven treatment of choice here is amputation.

Well, there have been new advances in chemotherapy.

Look, what's this about?

Are you afraid of being up front with these people?

Sir, I can't help imagining what it would be like getting this news myself.

How I felt when I was in danger of losing this guy.

Doctors lose every day, Morrison.

Sometimes they get lucky and win, too.

Accept that.

Now, the best thing that you can offer these people is comfort.

It's always been your long suit, anyway.

Come on.

Ellen.

Hi.

Is Mark joining you?

Uh, no.

Have a seat.

Thanks.

How's Barbara?

Vocal.

Well, after living with Mark, you should be used to the decibels.

Maybe I'm too old.

And Mark is no help at all.

He really pitched in at first, but now he's just like he was when Stephen was young.

He's only there for the coochie-coos.

Well, I think the concept of quality time eluded our generation.

The baby's teething, crying all the time.

What do I do?

I shove her at Mark and walk away.

What's wrong with me?

Ellen, the baby needs you.

If Mark isn't going to help, you're going to have to raise her yourself.

The problem is not with Mark.

You know, Mark blames himself for what happened to Stephen because he was never there.

But when I look back on who actually raised Stephen, I was the one responsible.

I guess maybe I was a lousy mother.

Do you want me to tell him?

I'd like to try myself.

Hi, Pete.

Hi.

Are you okay, Mom?

My arm doesn't really hurt that bad now.

Tim, we met with the doctors.

You know how out in the backyard the elm had gotten diseased?

One branch had a bad spot.

And the tree surgeon, he, um... I'll be all right for the game, won't I?

Tim, you've got a disease in the bone in your arm.

We've got to take the arm away so you can live.

You mean cut it off?

Dad, you can't let him cut it off.

You're not going to cut my arm off!

You're not going to cut my arm off!

You're not going to cut my arm off!

You're not going to cut my arm off!

Wow, the werewolves.

Let me get a picture of you two.

Now, that guy really gave me the creeps.

Me too, Harry Palms.

No, Dr. Stevens.

Westphall said he was one of the heavy hitters in med school.

And what's he got to show for it?

A suntan and a novel.

He didn't look a day over 40.

Perfect body, happy.

I mean, so what if he's not medical establishment?

Neither are you.

Yeah, but medicine should be more than just a hobby.

I mean, look at Westphall.

He's committed.

Which is more than we can say for us.

I mean, what are we going to do, lie about attending the conference?

Don't worry about it.

Relax.

We'll think of something.

Well, he's going to know as soon as he reads our reports.

We should have been more conscientious, sown some professional pride.

When Mary Todd must not have been too hot in the kitchen, he was thin as a rail.

You know, I bet I'd drop a few pounds if I moved to L.A.

Why would losing weight here be any easier than in Boston?

Because back home, everybody thinks of me as a fat person.

My friends, my family.

I mean, I'll always be the same to you.

But nobody has a history in La La Land.

Like Dr. Stevens.

You can come out here and reinvent your whole life.

Or lose yourself.

Where else could somebody charge seven and a half bucks a head to stare at a wax dummy of Muammar Gaddafi?

That's Bert Convy.

Elvis is so lifelike.

Even his hips are shaking.

What's happening?

It's an earthquake.

He's buried alive.

Perhaps we'll have to drink our own urine.

Look out for Dolly Parton.

Look, kid, I played with this deaf guy once.

It was a split end.

The quarterback gave him hand signals, no problem.

Guess I can't play with a deaf guy.

Yeah.

Listen, you hang in there.

You shouldn't take drugs to play.

It's stupid.

I got no choice, kid.

Sure.

I've been carting this kid around all day.

Except during surgery, when I was forced to give it to some dimwit in accounting.

Oh, hello, Barbara.

Did you miss your grandma?

You have a lot of explaining to do, Ellen.

To me and Barbara.

Well, Mark, I just needed some time alone.

Maybe that chowderhead Morrison enjoys mucking out his kids' diaries.

Life is all day, but I've got more important things to do.

Mark, you've got to take some responsibility here.

I bring home the bacon.

Speaking of which, what are we having?

Pot roast.

Ah, looks dry.

Mark, I'm up half the night with Barbara, as it is, while you're there fast asleep.

Honey, I perform surgery every day.

I need my rest.

I just cannot handle Barbara alone.

Well, we're not getting another nanny without extensive interviews.

We're going to use character references and maybe a polygraph.

By the way, Barbara needs a bath.

So do I.

You never notice how old and so close together the buildings are.

The ground's not going to open up and swallow us.

Keep the change.

We're not due back till day after tomorrow.

What are we going to do?

Sleep off the jet lag?

What are you two doing back from the West?

Oh, the conference was cancelled.

An earthquake damaged our hotel.

What did you do with the fun?

Take lunch, rub elbows with starlets, rub starlets.

Horace Greeley, live.

You're talking about my homeland here.

It's a great place.

Warm, mellow.

Moronic, stupid, give me four seasons in angst any day.

You didn't like it, huh?

What kind of car were you driving?

I miss L.A.

already.

Not me.

I love the dirty water.

Boston, you're my home.

The West Coast has the sunshine and the girls all get so tan.

You know, I got off the plane expecting the American dream in Technicolor.

It's just another city, big, dirty, impersonal.

The only difference is bums die under palm trees instead of maple.

See you guys around.

So, did you get my message at the hotel?

Oh, yeah.

It's right here.

One El Cholo bean and beef burrito to go.

Extra cheese.

Fabulous.

Hey, Pete and I want to say goodnight.

Tomorrow when they do operate, is it going to hurt?

No.

You'll be asleep.

If I was an adult, I wouldn't let you.

Kids have to do it.

Everybody tells them.

I'm sorry.

What are you sorry for?

I'm the one who'll be playing in the Special Olympics.

Well, I know what it's like to lose a part of you.

Not my arm.

I'm scared.

Yeah, I'll bet.

Well, I'm scared too, sometimes.

I get scared of losing people that I care about.

Of trusting myself.

Like you might feel.

Before a game.

There's no shame in being afraid.

We just can't let it ruin our lives.

Well, at least all my left one.

Yeah.

Hi.

What are you doing here?

This is the men's on-call room.

Used to be women's.

You staying?

I'm too tired to move.

I'm out of acid.

Hmm.

Had to stuff Tartellini, huh?

Nerves.

You?

Yeah, me.

Comes with the job.

Well.

You know what I think about the job?

I think this job stinks.

You residents treat me like I'm a water boy.

My old nursing buddies think I'm stuck up.

Dr. Craig's decided I'm a smartass.

I worked at this hospital for seven years.

Thought I knew it inside out.

24 hours later, I'm a mess.

Well, at least you could fool some of the patients.

No, I'm not even good at that.

You were right about our pal, Korzynski.

I had no time, so I was blunt, and all that did was terrify him.

Oh, Westphall wouldn't have marched you off to medical school.

If you couldn't handle the job.

Yeah, maybe.

This is just the first day.

Yeah, there's still plenty of time for you to really hate the place.

Jack?

I, uh, I put Pete back in daycare.

Good.

Listen, I'm sorry.

I didn't mean to jump down your throat today.

No, no, you were right.

Dr. Westphall, I understand that internal medicine is limiting acceptances for third years.

Well, that's a committee decision, Jack.

I have no idea who's going to go or stay.

No sense worrying about it now.

No, I'm not.

That's what I wanted to tell you.

You know, the past two years, I've kind of had the saps sucked out of me.

I know.

A lot of those problems I've run on myself.

Gave control of my life away, because, I don't know, not taking responsibility was easier.

Yeah.

Well, even having control doesn't necessarily mean we're going to make the right decisions, does it?

I had to tell that 10-year-old boy today that we're going to have to take his arm.

Yeah.

He cried.

But he never felt sorry for himself.

You know, I got this weird side of me.

Things I don't deserve to be happy.

But I do.

And with or without this hospital, I'll survive.

Yeah, I know you will, because this is the first time you've come to me without asking for advice.

Night.

We'll survive.

Huh?

It's all right, Barbara.

It's all right.

Susie.

It's okay, baby.

Just gonna look.

Grab me, dear.

Okay.

Okay.

Shh.

You sleep.

It's cold in here, isn't it?

Yes, it's cold.

What are we going to do?

What.

Are we going to do?