Original subtitles

Honey, can I ask,

what the fuck are you doing?

What do you mean? What do you mean, what am I doing?

Look, sweetie, I don't have time.

this right now, okay? I have a really important meeting.

Like, can you possibly just go somewhere else without it?

I'm trying to show you.

Is there anywhere else you can do this? I mean, come on.

Yes.

See what I learned today?

Yeah, you look really cute. The dancing's cute and all, but like can't

you do the dancing somewhere else and do the music somewhere else?

Why?

Honey, is there any way? Can you please? This is such a big opportunity for me.

Me too.

I don't think you realize that this is like six interviews in one and if I pass

this, this is like the biggest opportunity for us.

Come on.

Come on, Mom.

I need time to practice.

I just started this and I have no idea what I'm doing yet.

I know, and it will take time, but can you please, like, give it another hour

of time that you don't have to do this so I can do this?

Mom, ever since you got married, you just became this complete bitch.

Are you kidding?

Do you have any idea how hard I've been working for us?

Well, you got married for a reason.

Not just for that, okay? I need my independence too. Sometimes a woman

needs to work out of the house. And what about your child?

Honey, you are doing just fine.

You're doing just fine.

Come on, there has to be somewhere else, like a little bit farther away from me.

I mean, don't you have an office?

Are you kidding? This is my office. This house is my office for right now, okay?

And this is my practice place.

I go to school. I do my practice. I come home. I need somewhere else to practice

too. I understand that, sweetie. But if you could just practice somewhere else,

I could have my meeting. And then we'll move to a place where you can have your

own practice.

Are you kidding me?

God, Mom.

Go to your room.

Honey,

will you please just go to your room?

Honey? Go to your room!

Are you serious?

Like, come on. Just a little bit of time. Hi.

See? It's your husband's house, so you can't really tell me to go to my room.

Are you serious?

All I need is an hour.

What's going on?

She's over here playing.

That sounds great to me.

Honey, that's not what's at the point. It's like taking her time. Okay, one,

don't take her sign.

And two, I'm working on a really big proposal.

Honey, listen.

Sweetheart. Come here. Give me that. One second. One second. I'm going to give it

back to you, okay?

So look, your mom's dealing with some very important... Okay, you're not even

my dad.

So... Okay, yeah, but he's your stepfather. Excuse me? Okay?

Okay. I cannot believe this. I just need some quiet so I can express my ideas.

Why don't you go play in your room, huh? Yeah, but I'm trying to give her some

nice relaxing music.

And you will, okay? Are you kidding me? Just let her deal with it. Oh my God, I

freaking hate both of you guys.

Okay, look, I appreciate it, but honey, please, will you just keep her

quiet, keep her distracted? All I need is an hour to get my ideas across and

just, will you please?

I'll have it.

Thank you. Just focus on what you have to focus on. Thank you.

Sweetheart! Sweetheart.

What?

Nothing. Okay.

You've gotten so good at that, Princess.

You think so?

Yeah, absolutely.

You seem pretty good at that.

You're so cute.

Is there any way maybe you can play it a little lower?

It's an instrument.

It doesn't have a volume button.

You know what, sweetheart? You're right.

But how about maybe we can go to the park and play it as loud as you want?

The park?

You want me out in the park with all the creeps?

Sweetie, there's no creeps at the park.

Yes, there is. Look at my outfit.

It's beautiful, I know.

Princess, you know that your mom is in an important business call.

Can you just... And I'm in an important practice right now. Very important.

I love it. I really do. I do.

But you know, your mom's... She's a little busy right now, okay?

Sweetie, sweetie, look.

Okay? I don't want you to stop playing, okay?

but what if okay what if i can get you a different instrument that won't make so

much noise you can still practice on but it's still the flute it's the flute's

what i have to practice i have an alternative to the flute that you can

still practice on and it won't make any noise really

Professor Williams.

Just picture it being your regular flute, just with no noise, okay?

You wanna see it?

Yes. Okay.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

What?

Your dick?

Yes. You're my dad.

I'm your stepdad, okay? You said it yourself. What about mom?

Mom doesn't need to know. She's worried about her thing. This is helping mom,

okay? It doesn't make any noise.

That's kind of gross.

Why is it gross?

That is your dick. It's fine. Just picture it being your flute, okay? You

want to give it a shot?

Like this?

Just like that, okay?

I don't know.

Come on.

You can practice all you want, all right? And you can blow as hard as you

want. It won't make any noise.

There you go.

I guess it's kind of like my buttons.

Let me see.

It doesn't make any noise. I have to pretend where my buttons are.

Come on.

There you go.

A little closer.

Just like that. Does it not feel weird?

No, it feels good.

Good job.

La la la la la.

I told you it's not so bad.

No, not so bad.

Is that necessary?

Well, I just have to get the feel for the instrument. You have to really learn

it and feel it to play it.

Yeah, I guess you're right.

you're still trying to hang with it huh yeah sometimes they taste

my flu do you it's better better for the airflow right i have to

get it all lubricated the tip of it

You're doing good. Thank you.

Oh god.

Honey.

I do it to my flute sometimes.

Okay.

You sure mom won't hear this?

I'm sure baby, she's so busy.

I just gotta show you everything I do with my foot.

Oh sweetie.

Why don't you show me what else you learned with the flu, huh?

Okay.

I do lots of it. Show daddy what tricks you learned.

Okay.

Well, I need your help a little bit. Yeah? Yeah, my shorts are kind of in the

way.

I want

you to fuck me

I just

I just

wanted

to say thank you guys for being quiet and I really appreciate it I

only got like 15 more minutes on the phone.

You guys doing okay in there? Yeah, honey. I'm just helping her out with her

practice. All right. Sounds good. Thank you guys for keeping it down. I really

appreciate it.

I'm going to breathe just a little bit more and we'll be done.

Okay. Thank you, honey.

All right.

We need to stop, okay?

That was way too close.

Yes, yes. Look, we can do this another time, okay? Just, just, please.

Because what? What?

I'm going to tell mom if you don't follow me. Whoa, whoa, whoa. You're not

going to tell anybody. Hey, hey, listen. You're not going to tell. Come here.

Randy.

Yes, yeah, I just got off the meeting.

It went great.

Yes. Mom, I think I pretty much have a nailed memory. Mom, we both got this

dick.

Mom, we both got this dick.

Shut up. What are you doing? Look what you're doing.

I want to tell you,

I'm pretty sure we got this.

I'm going to tell mom.

They like the figures.

Well, yeah, we have to go to the office.

File some paperwork, you know, iron some things out. But yeah, I'm pretty sure we

got it.

I know. Oh, God. You know what this means?

This is amazing. Yeah.

Look,

we've been wanting this for a while now, right?

Yeah.

Yes, I know.

Okay, well, I'm gonna run.

I'll talk to you later, okay?

Well, wait, wait, what?

Well, yeah, we can do those a bit later, too. Do you wanna, hey, if you want, why

don't you bring over a bottle of wine tonight and we can find more shots?

Oh my God, yes!

Yeah, okay?

Love it, love it, okay.

Oh my gosh. Okay, so just got done with the meeting. I got to run to the office,

got to do a few things.

But yeah, I think I nailed it. Yes? Yes.

That's good. She's good. She's in the room. She's, you know, she's over.

I let her know that you're busy and you need your time to really focus.

Okay? Happy day. Happy day. We're nailing this parent thing. All right.

Love you.

All right. I'll be there, baby. Call me. Call me.

Why would you do that?

Why would you do that? You know it's nice.

Why would you do that, though?

I would have fucked you to just... No, you wouldn't have.

Oh, my God.

Oh, baby.

Yes, please.

Yes, please.

Oh, my God.

Oh, baby, I pushed you so little.

oh my god they just gotta be so fucking fit

She's really little but you know how to fuck

Well, because your mom really wants you to get better so start practicing while

I take my clothes off. I only have an hour until she gets home. It's fine.

Start practicing.

Good.

Good.

Keep practicing.

A good musician can focus no matter in what situation.

Remember, you got to be able to focus in a big crowd.

It's so hard.

It's just so hard.

Focus, baby.

You guys can see so much tighter than your mom.

Yeah, you like fucking me better than her.

Oh my God,

I'm trying to let you go.

I'm trying to let you do me.

oh my god oh my

god oh my god

oh my

gosh

Thank you for fucking me. Oh my god.

God, you're lucky I didn't tell mom.

Oh my gosh.

Oh my god

oh my god

Yeah.

oh my god

oh shit

Oh God.

I guess, I guess I won't tell mama after all. I'm sorry you did so great today at

practice. Uh-huh.

Okay. Thank you.

So. What are you doing with that?

I want you to practice before your mom gets home.

We're not, are we done now?

Practice makes perfect, baby. You know this.

I just...