Original subtitles

PREVIOUSLY ON "WHAT ABOUT BRIAN"...

YOU COULD SELL THESE R CUPCAKER.

AND MAKE A FORTUNE. YOU REALLY THINK I COULD DO IT?

I HAVE A DELIVERY FONATASHA DREW. I WASN'T EXPECTING A PACKAGE.

I'M SORRY TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR GUYS' DIVORCE...

NOT THAT I COULDN'T SEE IT COMING.

MY MOVIE PREMIERE'S THIS WEEK, AND THEY'RE COVERING IT ON E!

WILL YOU BE MY PLUS ONE?

LAURA! I GOT 'EM! LET ME SEE!

CHEESY MAGAZINES- THEY MAKE ME SO HAPPY!

I KNOW. ME,TOO... ESPECIALLY WHEN I'M IN THEM.

OKAY. I'LL TAKE THESE. YOU TAKE THESE.

OH,MY GOD!

OOH,THIS ONE HAS ONE OF THOSE POLLS

WITH ME AND SOMEONE ELSE IN THE SAME DRESS,

AND I WON! 76% OF PEOPLE SAY THAT

I LOOK BETTER IN THAT DRESS THAN LISA RINNA.

DID YOU GUYS STEAL MY PAPER...

AND THEN ROB A NEWSSTAND? WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?

WE'RE JUST LOOKING R STEPHANIE PICTURES. HOW'S MY BUTT LOOK?

I'M SURE YOUR BUTT LOOKS FANTASTIC.

CAN I HAVE MY SPORTS SECTION NOW?

AND A,UH,"HELLO" WOULD BE NICE. HI THERE.

HEY.

THANK YOU.

WH? IS THAT A PICTURE OF ME IN SKINNY JEANS?

I KNEW THEY WERE ON THE WAY OUT.

???

IT'S JUST A PICTURE OF THE TWO OF US. OH,COME ON!

GIVE IT TO ME.

ALL RIGHT.

UH,WHAT DOES THIS EVEN MEAN, "WORST ACCESSORY"? IT'S NOTHING.

JUST FORGET ABOUT IT. IT'S JUST ONE OF THOSE STUPID THINGS

THEY DO WITH RED CARPET PICTURES-

YOU KNOW,WHEN SOMEONE HAS, LIKE,AN UGLY PURSE

OR SOME BAD JEWELRY. NO,THEY MEAN ME. I'M THE WORST ACCESSORY.

NO,MAYBE THEY JUST MEAN

THE WHITE SOCKS WITH THE BLACK SUIT. NO,THEY MEAN HIM.

WHAT? IT'S NOT A BIG DEAL. LOOK,RIGHT NEXT TO YOU,

BEN AFFLECK HAS THE WORST SUNGLASSES. FIRST OF ALL,

I HAVE THOSE SUNGLASSES, AND SECOND OF ALL,

I BASICALLY AM THOSE SUNGLASSES NOW.

DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT KIND OF CRAP

I'M GONNA GET FOR THIS FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE?

WE HAVE TO CONTAIN THIS. NO ONE CAN KNOW.

DO NOT TELL A SOUL- NO ONE!

BUT THAT'S GONNA BE- PFFT! NO ONE.

* DANCE,SISTER,DANCE,SISTER *

* COME ON AND SHAKE IT,SISTER *

WHAT IS THIS JUNK?

* COME ON AND SHAKE IT,GIRL *

* DANCE,SISTER,DANCE,SISTER *

YEAH,HI. I'D LIKE TO CANCEL A SUBSCRIPTION.

IT'S UNDER HEATHER HILLMAN.

MM-HMM.

WAIT,I'VE GOTTA CL YOU BACK.

DAVE,WHERE ARE YOU? GETTING AN EARLY MORNING COFFEE AND A MUFFIN.

YOU EVER NOTICED A LACK OF A GOOD MUFFIN STORE? HEY,DO YOU GUYS GET

NO. WHY? DO YOU? AND IF SO,WHY?

LOOK,IT WAS HEATHER'S, OKAY? HANG ON A SECOND.

* DANCE,SISTER,DANCE,SISTER, COME ON AND SHAKE IT,GIRL *

HEY,UH,LOOK- JUST GET IT,OKAY?

PAGE 12. YOU'LL THANK ME LATER.

ALL RIGHT. FINE.

HEY. (Deena) Hi.

HEY,WE GET "CELEBRITY BEAT" MAGAZINE?

WHY? (laughs)

I DON'T KNOW. ADAM TOLD ME TO GET IT.

NO,WE DON'T GET IT. HOLD ON A SECOND.

JACKPOT. PAGE 12... PAGE...

MOMMY,I WANTED TO WEAR THE RED SWEATER TODAY.

YOU CAN WEAR IT TOMORROW, SWEETIE. DAVE,I GOTTA GO. OH,THIS IS FANTASTIC, DEENA.

BUY ME ONE. I'M DROPPING THE GIRLS OFF AT SCHOOL,OKAY?

OKAY. WHAT-WHOSE SCHOOL? THEIR SCHOOL. WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH YOU?

ME? NOTHING'S WRONG WITH ME.

UH,I-I JUST THINK YOU SHOULD GET IN

AND GET OUT AS FAST AS POSSIBLE. OKAY.

OH,HEY,SHARON. IS,UH, TRACY STILL ON

FOR A PLAYDATE AT OUR HOUSE TODAY? ACTUALLY,UH,

MAYBE GENEVA SHOULD COME TO OUR HOUSE INSTEAD. REALLY?

OR MAYBE WE SHOULD JUST RESCHEDULE.

HI. THERE IS LARISSA'S PERMISSION SLIP

FOR THE FIELD TRIP.

THANK YOU FOR VOLUNTEERING. OH,IT'S NO PROBLEM.

REALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO I

I THINK I WAS GENEVA'S CHAPERO

TO THE LA BREA TAR PITS AS WELL.

OKAY,UH, IS SOMETHING GOING ON?

IS SOMETHING WRONG?

DID LARISSA BITE SOMEONE AGAIN?

BECAUSE WE TALKED TO HER ABOUT IT-

MRS. GRECO, IT'S NOT YOUR DAUGHTER.

IT'S YOUR HUSBAND. DAVE? WHAT DID HE DO?

YOUR HUSBAND ATTACKED RICHARD ROVICH

ON THE SCHOOL PROPERTY IN FRONT OF ALL THE KIDS.

THEY WERE WRESTLING ON THE GROUND

LIKE TWO LITTLE... KIDS.

YEAH?

HELLO. RONNIE SAID I COULD COME IN.

I HAVE THE,UH,THE DOCUMENTS.

HI.

MMM.

I GOTTA LOCK THE DOOR. OH,NO,NO,NO.

THERE'S NO LOCK ON THE DOOR. RONNIE KEEPS 'EM OUT.

SHE'S A PIT BULL. OOH.

NOW LET'S ROTATE THE BABY'S LEGS

LIKE A BICYCLE.

SORRY. AM I LATE? I...

BELLA ALWAYS GETS CNKY WHEN I-

WHEN I HAVE TO WAKE HER UP FROM HER NAP.

OH,YOU SHOULD NEVER WAKE A SLEEPING BABY.

YES,WE'LL GET TO THAT.

RIGHT NOW,NICOLE,

CYNTHIA WAS TELLING US ABOUT DYLAN'S DIAPER RASH.

IT'S JUST-IT'S- IT'S NOT GOING AWAY,

AND I-I CALL THE PEDIATRICIAN EVERY DAY,

AND SHE JUST SAYS TO PUT MORE DIAPER RASH CREAM ON.

I'M HONESTLY THINKING OF JUST SWITCHING.

CREAMS? NO,DOCTORS.

I'M SURE IT'S GONNA BE OKAY.

I MEAN,IT'S JUST A DIAPER RASH,RIGHT?

I MEAN, DON'T ALL BABIES GET IT? EVERYONE HAS THEIR OWN PROBLEMS,NICOLE,

AND WE LIKE TO KEEP THIS CLASS A JUDGE-FREE ZONE. OH,NO,NO,I WASN'T-

MAYBE YOU'D LIKE TO SHARE SOMETHING. ANYTHING?

WELL,ACTUALLY, THERE IS SOMETHING

THAT I'D LIKE SOME ADVICE ON, YEAH. UM...

AND SINCE WE'RE ALL STRANGERS HERE,

MAYBE THIS IS A SAFE PLACE.

OKAY. I SLEPT WITH MY BROTHER'S BEST FRIEND ADAM,

AND JUST KEEPING THIS SECRET IS KILLING ME. YOU HAVEN'T TOLD HIM

NO,THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT. NO,HE'S NOT THE FATHER.

NO,THIS JUST HAPPENED THE OTHER NIGHT.

THE POINT IS THAT IT- IT'S JUST-KEEPING A SECRET

FROM EVERYONE-OUR FRIENDS AND,YOU KNOW,BRIAN-

THAT-THAT'S MY BROTHER-

I DON'T KNOW WHAT HE WOULD DO IF HE FOUND OUT,

AND I'M JUST FEELING SO GUILTY,YOU KNOW?

AND I'M JUST WONDERING,

DOES ANYONE THINK THAT I SHOULD TELL?

I'M NOT SURE THAT'S QUITE

WHAT MOMMY AND BABY CLASSES ARE ABOUT.

OKAY,LET'S PICK UP OUR BABIES AND MOVE TO CIRCLE TIME.

MORNING.

* WELL,I'VE BEEN DRIVIN' THE WRONG WAY *

* UP YOUR ONE-WAY STREET... *

DON'T DO THAT.

WHAT,DID YOU LEARN THAT FROM NATASHA? MORNING,GLORY. WHAT'S UP?

THESE SKETCHES- "LIFE SUCKS."

OKAY, OUR HERO GETS DEPRESSED,

FALLS DOWN A LITTLE SEWER GRATE HERE,

AND HE'S GOTTA BATTLE ALL OF HIS EX-GIRLFRIENDS

UNTIL HE GETS BACK UP TO THE TOP. THESE ARE GOOD.

YEAH. YOU CAN SHOW 'EM TOBOSS-ZILLASOON?

DEFINITELY. GOOD.

ANYTHING... ELSE?

RIGHT NOW? IT'S 10:00 A.M.,BUDDY.

WHAT ELSE DO YOU WANT? I MEAN,IT'S NOT THE ARMY.

RIGHT.

* IT'S A HARD WAY UP *

* AND A LONG WAY DOWN *

VERY FUNNY,YOU GUYS.

IF ONLY YOU COULD BE THIS CREATIVE ALL THE TIME.

* SAY YOU'RE MINE, BABY,LET ME KNOW... *

DO THIS ALL BY YOURSELF?

NO... NATASHA HELPED.

OH. SHE CAME UP WITH THE SCREEN SAVER.

THAT'S JUST... WRONG.

AND FUNNY. DON'T-DON'T FORGET FUNNY.

* IT'S A HA WAY UP *

NATASHA, I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE.

* IT'S A HARD WAY UP... *

WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

I CAN'T TELL YOU THAT.

SEE,THERE'S A THING CALLED LAWYER/CLIENT CONFIDENTIALITY.

CAN WE,UH, HELP YOU WITH SOMETHING?

NO. NOTHING.

FORGET IT.

I'LL TALK TO YOU LATER.

OH,HEY,AND,UH, DON'T WORRY.

I SAW IT.

THOSE-THOSE WHITE SOCKS ARE REALLY HARD TO MISS.

* LONG WAY DOWN *

* IT'S A HARD WAY UP *

* AND A LONG WAY DOWN *

GOD,THAT WAS CLOSE.

YEAH. RONNIE IS SO FIRED.

YEAH. JEEZ.

www. 1000fr.com present

sync:FRM@����

HEY,HONEY. SO HOW WAS CLASS?

UGH. THEY ALL HATE ME. GIVE IT TIME.

THE MOMS CAN BE A LITTLE BIT JUDGMENTAL AT FIRST. AH,WHO CARES? WHATEVER.

IT'S NOT ABOUT ME. IT'S ABOUT US. YEAH,BUT I THOUGHT WE WERE HAVING LUNCH.

THIS PLACE LOOKS A LITTLE CLOSED. THE ARTICLE IN "L.A. MAGAZINE"-

THE ONE THAT'S COMING OUT IN A FEW DAYS?

"HOTTEST CUPCAKE IN L.A." UH-HUH?

LAST YEAR WHEN MY BAND WAS FEATURED,

THEY BECAME AN INSTANT SUCCESS. SO?

SO WELCOME TO "ICING ON THE CUPCAKE."

PLEASE DON'T BE SAYING WHAT I THINK YOU'RE SAYING. I AM.

WE JUST ASSUMED THIS LEASE. DON'T WORRY,DON'T WORRY.

WE CAN AFFORD IT. RAN THE NUMBERS.

THE RENT'S CHEAP. THE LOCATION'S GREAT.

IT USED TO BE A BAKERY. IT'S PERFECT.

WE CAN OPEN RIGHT AWAY. NIC,I DON'T KNOW.

WHAT'S THERE TO KNOW? IT'S A DONE DEAL.

WE'RE REALLY GONNA HAVE OUR OWN BUSINESS,

JUST LIKE DAVE AND BRIAN, ONLY SUCCESSFUL,OKAY?

WELL,WHEN DO WE HAVE TO HAVE THIS PLACE READY?

YOU KNOW,REALISTICALLY? YESTERDAY.

WELL, MAYBE WE SHOULDN'T DO THIS

AT YOUR OFFICE ANYMORE, YOU KNOW?

WE DON'T WANT PEOPLE GETTING SUSPICIOUS.

YEAH,SURE. THAT'S FINE.

HERE-HERE'S THE THING. I...

I THINK YOU'RE A GREAT GIRL.

WAIT. YOU'RE KIDDING ME,RIGHT?

AND IT'S JUST THAT, YOU KNOW,

I'M NOT REALLY LOOKING FOR A RELATIONSHIP RIGHT NOW,SO...

RELATIONSHIP? WHOA,WHOA,WHOA.

WHO SAID ANYTHING ABOUT A RELATIONSHIP?

WELL,I JUST ASSUMED THAT THAT'S WHERE-

OKAY. ALL RIGHT.

MAYBE WE NEED SET SOME GROUND RULES.

WE DON'T NEED TO TALK ABOUT

HOW OUR-OUR DAY WAS OR HOW WORK WAS.

I DON'T CARE.

SWEET. NEITHER DO I. GOOD,AND I DON'T NEED TO KNOW WHERE YOU GREW UP

OR WHAT YOUR MOTHER'S NAME IS

OR WHEN YOUR BIRTHDAY IS. NOTHING. MM.

AND WE DON'T NEED TO DISCUSS, YOU KNOW,HOW YOU'RE FEELING

OR HOW I'M FEELING OR WHAT WE'RE THINKING. OKAY.

I'M NOT GONNA ASK YOU, AND YOU'RE NOT GONNA ASK ME. AT IS SO FANTASTIC.

GOOD. YEAH.

I'M GONNA GET BACK TO WORK. HEY,I DON'T CARE.

RIGHT.

WEREOU EVER GONNA TELL ME YOU PUNCHED RICHARD?

I DIDN'T PUNCH RICHARD.

YOU DIDN'T?

NO. UH-HUH.

WE SORT OF WRESTLED.

DAVE.

DEENA. WHAT-

COME ON,DEEN. HE STARTED IT.

"HE STARTED IT"? YEP.

WOW. WHAT ARE YOU,5?

OKAY,FINE. FINE,I DID IT.

I DID IT, AND I'M SORRY. OKAY?

YOU'RE NOT REALLY MAD AT ME RIGHT NOW,ARE YOU? NO,I'M NOT REALLY MAD AT YOU.

BUT,I MEAN,COME ON.

IT'S JUST A LITTLE EMBARRASSING THAT I HAVE TO

SEND YOU TO CHAPERONE LARISSA'S FIELD TRIP.

WHOA,WHOA,WHOA,WHOA, WHOA. HOLD ON A SEC.

YOU'RE CHAPERONING. NO.

YES,BECAUSE I HAVE A LITTLE THING CALLED WORK

THAT I GO TO EVERY DAY, DEENA,AND I DO,UH,WORK. HMM.

WHAT'S THAT? WHAT'S THE LOOK?

YEAH,IN CASE YOU FORGOT,

I HAVE TO OPEN A CUPCAKE STORE THAT DAY.

OH,THANK YOU, MARIA. GOOD NIGHT.

YOU'RE WELCOME. THE GIRLS HAVE EATEN. GREAT. GOOD NIGHT.

OKAY. NIGHT,MARIA.

WAIT A MINUTE. WHAT CUPCAKE STORE?

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

HOW CAN I FORGET ABOUT SOMETHING THAT I DON'T EVEN KNOW ABOUT?

OH,WELL... I OWN A CUPCAKE STORE NOW!

YEAH,ME AND NICOLE. JUST A 6-MONTH LSE.

WE JUST THOUGHT WE'D GIVE IT A SHOT.

WHAT? OH! UGH.

WHAT "OH,WHAT"? WHAT IS IT?

IT'S A NOTICE FROM THE COURT.

WE HAVE TO FILE OUR DIVORCE PAPERWORK NEXT WEEK,

OR WE HAVE TO START THE PROCESS ALL OVER AGAIN.

DIVORCE PAPERWORK- THAT'S FUN.

YES. AH,SO,UH, WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO?

NOTHING,RIGHT?

YES. NOTHING.

JUST...

KEEP DOING WHAT WE'RE DOING. RIGHT.

WHAT IS IT THAT WE'RE DOING AGAIN? DATING...

YEAH. SECRETLY.

MM-HMM. WE'RE MOVING FORWARD.

AND AS LONG AS WE'RE MOVING FORWARD,

THEN TT'S GOOD,RIGHT? YEAH,RIGHT. THAT'S GREAT.

YEAH. GREAT. THAT'S GOOD.

SO CAN WE TALK ABOUT THIS CUPCAKE STORE

FOR A SECOND?

MMM... I,UH, I HATE TO SAY THIS,

BUT WE'RE GONNA BE LATE IF WE DON'T GO.

WOULDN'T YOU RATHER JUST STAY HERE

AN GO TO THAT STUPID RESTAURANT?

WELL,SURE, BUT I THOUGHT

YOU WERE THE ONE THAT WANTED TO GO. MNH-MNH.

OH,WELL... MMM, THIS COULD WORK.

IT'S MY MANAGER. I HAVE TO GET THIS.

YEAH.

HELLO?

WHAT DO YOU WANT ON YOUR PIZZA?

ACTUAL,WE'RE,UH, GOING OUT TO EAT.

WHAT'S THAT FACE?

NOTHING-JUST MY REGULAR FACE. I'LL LET STEPHANIE TELL YOU.

TELL ME WHAT? YOU READY?

I THOUGHT WE WERE STAYING IN.

WE HAVE A RESERVATION.

THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THE WAY I FEEL ABOUT YOU,BRIAN,

SO DON'T TAKE IT PERSONALLY, 'CAUSE I REALLY LIKE YOU. ARYOU BREAKING UP WITH ME?

BECAUSE WE'RE NOT EVEN AOUPLE, SO THAT WOULD JUST BE WEIRD.

WE-WE HAVEN'T EVEN HAD SEX YET. WHOA. TOO MUCH INFORMATION.

IT'S MY MANAGER.

SHE'S KIND OF SUGGESTING THAT I... RE-ACCESSORIZE.

(laughs) SORRY. IGNORE ME. I'M NOT EVEN HERE.

YOU'RE TAKING DATING ADVICE FROM YOUR MANAGER? NO,NOT AT ALL...

IT'S CAREER ADVICE. AND I JUST CAN'T BE SEEN

WITH YOU IN PUBLIC FOR A LITTLE WHILE. OH. WHY WOULD I TAKE THAPERSONALLY?

IT'S NOT GONNA BE FOREVER.

* I DON'T KNOW, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY *

SAUSAGE OKAY?

YOU'RE GONNA KILL YOUR EYES THISAY.

UH,YEAH. FLUORESCENT LIGHTS DEPRESS ME.

SO BUY SOME BETTER LAMPS.

WE'LL EVEN PAY FOR 'EM-PERKS. SPEAKING OF WHICH...

ONE OF OUR CLIENTS OWNS

THE ATHENEUM HOTEL IN BEVERLY HILLS.

I FIGURED YOU COULD USE A LITTLEUN.

FREE DINNER,SUITE, 5-STAR HOTEL.

YOU THINK YOU CAN SCARE SOMEONE UP TO GO WITH YOU?

YEAH. I THINK I CAN.

GOOD. HAVE FUN. RELAX. OH,ONE OTHER THING-

UH,GUY ROWLAND IS GONNA BE IN TOWN FOR A FEW DAYS.

HE WORKS FOR OURLIENT, COOPERTON MANUFACTURING. SO YOU NEED ME

HE KNOWS A LOT ABOUT THE CAR LOCKS

THAT COOPERTON MAKES. OH? LIKE WHAT?

LIKE WHETHER THEY'RE FAULTY OR NOT.

WE NEED HIM TO SIGN THIS STATEMENT

SAYING THAT THEY'RE NOT.

THIS IS... THIS IS ALREADY WRITTEN.

DO I NEED TO BRING SOMEONE AS A WITNESS TO AUTHENTICATE IT? NO,THERE'S NO NEED FOR THAT.

WE ALREADY WROTE THIS FOR HIM WITHOUT HIS KNOWLEDGE. UH...

WHAT IF HE DOESN'T AGREE TO SIGN IT?

THAT'S WHAT YOU'RE THERE FOR, HILLMAN.

DON'T LEAVE WITHOUT A SIGNATURE.

YOU'RE AUTHORIZED TO DO WHATEVER IT TAKES.

I HAVE FAITH IN YOU. ENJOY THE HOTEL.

THIS IS MY VERY OWN RECIPE.

I CALL IT "CYNTHIA'S CARROT CONCOCTION."

OH,I'M SO SORRY.

I COULD'VE SWORN THAT I MADE ENOUGH FOR EVERYONE.

YOU MAKE YOUR OWN BABY FOOD?

DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY PRESERVATIVES

ARE IN PROCESSED BABY FOOD?

I'M SORRY ABOUT WHAT I SAID THE OTHER DAY.

I-I-I WAS NERVOUS, AND I-I WANTED TO FIT IN.

THAT'S OKAY.

IT MUST BE HARD FOR YOU AT YOUR AGE.

OKAY,LADIES. TIME TO GATHER YOUR BABIES.

PLAYTIME IS OVER.

WAIT.

HOW-HOW MUCH WOULD YOU PAY FOR A CUPCAKE? WHAT?

MY FRIEND AND I ARE OPENING A CUPCAKE STORE

RIGHT OVER THERE, WHERE THE BAKERY USED TO BE,

AND I'M JUST WONDERING HOW MUCH YOU WOULD PAY

FOR A TOP-OF-THE-LINE, DELICIOUS CUPCAKE. PROBABLY NOTHING.

WE DON'T REALLY GIVE THE KIDS SUGAR.

OH,YEAH,LOOK AT THAT, BABY.

"ICING ON THE CUPCAKE." HUH.

SO LET ME GET THIS RIGHT. YOU DIDN'T HIT HIM?

NO. TRIED TO HIT HIM. OKAY? BUT HE MOVED.

I DON'T KNOW. THIS GUY'S WEIRD. HE'S LIKE A BOXER OR SOMETHING.

HE SLIPPED IT. YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? YEAH. YEAH,I'M SURE THAT'S WHAT IT WAS.

SO THIS IS THE GUY THAT DEENA SLEPT WITH- DON'T SAY IT.

YEAH,DON'T SAY IT,BUT YES. ANYWAY,THIS GUY'S JUST A POMPOUS ASS.

YOU KNOW,I JUST WANTED TO HIT HIM-ONE GOOD SHOT, YOU KNOW?

LIKE YOU-YOU WITH BRIAN ABOUT THE MARJORIE THING. HEY! HEY, LEAVE ME OUT OF THIS.

I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING WITH MARJORIE. YEAH, AND WHAT I DID WAS WRONG. I MEAN,I SHOULDN'T

HAVE HIT BRIAN. I MEAN, PEOPLE SLEEP WITH PEOPLE.

I THINK WE GET ALL WORKED UP ABOUT THE SEX THING OF IT ALL,

YOU KNOW? I MEAN,CAN'T WE ALL JUST,YOU KNOW,BE?

WOW,DUDE, YOU'RE FREAKING ME OUT. OKAY,OKAY. LET ME ASK YOU SOMETHING. SPEAKING OF SEX,

IF YOU GUYS WERE GOING OUT WITH A SUPER HOT-ROD GIRL-

I MEAN,YOU KNOW, WITH BEST ASS IN TWO COUNTIES,

AND SHE DIDN'T WANT YOU TO BE SEEN IN PUBLIC WITH HER...

BUT-HEY,SHUT UP. BUT SHE DID WANNA LAY AROUND YOUR APARTMENT,

MAKE OUT,EAT PIZZA

AND EVENTUALLY HAVE SEX, WOULD YOU DO IT? YEAH! WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?

ARE YOU KIDDING ME? WHAT IS THIS,

SOME KIND OF JOKE OR SOMETHING? COME ON,MAN.

YOU'RE THE LUCKIEST GUY ON THE PLANET.

YOU DON'T HAVE TO GO OUT? WHO WANTS TO GO OUT?

IT'S EXPENSIVE. IT'S BORING. YOU DOT EVEN HAVE TO GO OUT AND YOU STILL GET THSEX?

THAT'S FANTASTIC! COME ON, BRIAN. HAVE FUN.

I MEAN,SO WHAT IF YOU WEAR REALLY BAD SOCKS? WHO CARES?

I MEAN,YOU DON'T WANNA GET SERIOUS AFTER BRIDGET ANYWAY. YEAH.

YOU GUYS, DEENA'S ARTICLE'S OUT. COME ON.

(Ivy) "SINGLE AND SUCCESSFUL DEENA GRECO

HAS BEEN NAMED L.A.'s HOTTEST CUPCAKE."

OH,WOW. WHEN PEOPLE SEE THIS PICTURE,

THEY'RE NOT GONNA KNOW IF THEY'RE TALKING

ABOUT YOU OR THE ACTUAL CUPCAKES.

(Nicole) GOOD. AS LONG AS PEOPLE BUY SOMETHING.

SEX SELLS,RHT?

OKAY,STOP. BUT I HAVE TO SAY,

THIS IS MY SECOND FAVORITE MAGAZINE OF THE DAY.

LOOK.

OH,MY. AND HERE IT COMES.

OKAY,BRIAN, WHITE SOCKS? REALLY? WHAT?

THAT REMINDS ME,MAN. UM...

WE ALL GOT YOU SOMETHING. YOU KNOW,IT'S A-

IT'S A GIFT,YOU KNOW, FROM ALL OF US.

WE-WE ALL KIND OF CHIPPED IN.

YEAH,WE FIGURED IF YOU WERE GONNA BE THE WORST ACCESSORY,

THEN YOU SHOULD HAVE THE WORST ACCESSORY.

THEY'RE SOCKS. OH,WOW. YOU GUYS ARE THE BEST. YOU KNOW,

I'M GONNA GO OUT TO MY CAR AND GET THE REST OF THIS STUFF,

BUT,UM,YOU KNOW, WHILE I'M GONE,

CONTINUE TO MAKE FUN OF ME,OKAY? OHWE DEFINITELY WILL.

HAVE NO FEAR- THAT WILL HAPPEN. ALL RIGHT!

IT'S FUNNY HOW ALL OF A SUDDEN OUR FRIENDS ARE CELEBRITIES.

WE'VE GOT BRIAN AND DEENA...

AND STEPHANIE AND...

LIL TAMMY.

OKAY. (all laughing)

OH,NO.

OKAY,NO,NO. THAT'S ENOUGH. COME ON.

WHAT WAS IT YOU USED TO SAY ON "THE LIL TAMMY SHOW"? NO,DUDE. DUDE, YOU DO NOT

IT'S UGLY. SHE GETS LIKE THE HULK. IT'LL BE OKAY.

COME ON. TELL US ANYWAY. COME ON. WE'RE ALL FRIENDS.

WHAT IS IT? OH,OH,OH! I GOT IT. I GOT IT. IT WAS,UH... DUDE. DUDE. SERIOUSLY.

IT WAS,UH... DON'T-

WOWSERS! OKAY,THAT'S IT.

WHY DON'T YOU DO ONE FOR US? PLEASE?

YOU OWE US ONE,YOU KNOW, FOR KEEPING YOUR LITTLE SECRET. OH,REALLY?

YEAH. BUT SEE,I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE THAT KEEPS SECRETS AROD HERE.

I MEAN, FOR INSTANCE, YOU DIDN'T

TELL US AT YOU HAD SEX WITH NICOLE.

WOWSERS! YOU WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO TELL ANYONE.

YOU KNOW,MAYBE IF YOU DIDN'T INSULT ME TO THE RLS

OR TO DEENA'S LESBIAN MOTHER. WHAT?

AND YOU-YOU WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO TELL ANYONE,EITHER.

IT WAS A SECRET. DID YOU KNOW ABOUT THIS?

DO YOU THINK I COULD KEEP THIS FROM YOU?

SO ADAM IS THE...

"NOTHING SPECIAL" GUY?

WELL,YEAH. NO!

NO,NO,NO- WAS SOMETHING SPECIAL,OKAY? I WAS. THAT'S IT. ENOUGH!

LISTEN,BRIAN DOESN'T KNOW, ALL RIGHT? AND I'D LIKE

TO KEEP IT THAT WAY, BECAUSE IF HE FINDS OUT,

HE'LL BE PISSED OFF. SO PLEASE, LET'S NOT TELL HIM,OKAY? FINE.

BESIDES,THINGS ARE FINALLY BACK TO NORMAL BETWEEN THE TWO OF US.

I'D LIKE TO KEEP THEM THAT WAY.

WHEW.

WHAT? WHAT'D I MISS?

IF YOU'RE GONNA BLAME SOMEONE HERE,

MAYBE YOU SHOULD BLAME YOURSELF

FOR TELLING ME IN THE FIRST PLACE. WHAT?!

YEAH,IT'S HARD TO LOOK IN THE MIRROR,ISN'T IT? YOU ARE INSANE.

AND IF IT WAS A SECRET AND YOU TOLD ME,

THEN YOU'RE JUST AS BAD AS I AM. NO,NO,NO,NO,I'M NOT.

HAVE YOU HEARD OF THE MARRIAGE CODE?

NO! THE MARRIAGE CODE,WOMAN!

A HUSBAND AND WIFE ARE ONE UNIT. IF YOU TELL ONE SOMETHING,

THE OTHER UNIT AUTOMATICALLY FINDS OUT ABOUT IT.

EVERYONE KNOWS THAT. WELL, THEN,IF THAT'S TRUE, THEN IT IS NO BIG DEAL.

ADAM SHOULD'VE KNOWN THAT I KNEW. IVY! YOU HAVE A PROBLEM. JUST ADMIT IT.

JUST ADMIT IT,PLEASE. NO,I WON'T! I WON'T! I WON'T!

BECAUSE YOU NEVER TOLD ME IT WAS A SECRET.

I- SO I THINK WE'VE LEARNED A VALUABLE LESSON HERE.

NEXT TIME YOU SHOULD BE MORE CLEAR. YOU'VE LOST YOUR MIND!

WHATEVER. WOWSERS!

I HATE YOU.

CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS WHOLE NIC AND ADAM THING?

I KNOW. IT'S CRAZY...

OR PERFECT. YEAH.

I'M GONNA BE UP ALL NI

MM.

"SINGLE AND SUCCESSFUL DEENA GRECO..."

SO WHAT,DID YOU TELL THEM THAT YOU WERE SINGLE?

I MEAN,DID YOU MAKE A POINT OF IT FOR THE ARTICLE?

I DON'T KNOW,DAVE. PROBABLY.

I MEAN,I WAS, YOU KNOW,AT THE TIME.

PEOPLE ARE GONNA THINK THAT WE'RE DIVORCED,

AND WE'RE NOT DIVORCED.

DAVE,IT WAS A WHILE AGO.

JUST DON'T LIKE TO THINK ABOUT YOU AS SINGLE.

THAT'S ALL. BUT I'M NOT SINGLE.

MM.

I AM DATING... SECRETLY.

OH,YEAH. REMEMBER?

OH,YEAH. HOW COULD I FORGET? YEAH.

YOU ALSO REMEMBER THE FIELD TRIP TOMORROW?

HOW COULD I FORGET?

IT'S GONNA BE GREAT.

OKAY,COME ON. PICK UP THE PACE.

PICK UP THE PACE. PICK UP THE PACE. WE'RE GONNA BE LATE.

DADDY,I CAN'T GO ANY FASTER. YOU CAN GO A LITTLE BIT FASTER. JUST GO.

SORRY ABOUT THAT.

SO GLAD I TOOK THE DAY OFF FOR THIS.

MY DAD SAID THAT MAN HIT THAT MAN...

AND HE HITS LIKE A GIRL.

THERE ARE TEN,NIC-

THE SAME AMOUNT AS WHEN WE STARTED THIS MORNING,

BEUSE WE'VE ONLY SOLD FIVE ALL DAY,

AND NONE OF THEM WERE RED VELVET.

WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO?

I MEAN,WE ARE GOING UNDER, AND WE WERE NEVER EVEN OVER! JUST BREATHE,OKAY?

HERE. HAVE A CUPCAKE. I CAN'T...

OH,HI! HOW ARE YOU?

HI. CAN I OFFER YOU A FREE SAMPLE?

WOW. MMM.

MMM. WOW,THIS IS AMAZING. OOH.

MMM. BUT I'M SORRY. I JUST CAME IN HERE

TO GET SOME CHANGE TO FEED MY METER.

MMM.

OOH.

OKAY. THAT'S ENOUGH OF THE FREE SAMPLES.

YOU KNOW THAT WON'T BE A PROBLEM,MR. GREEN.

(clears throat) I GET IT. I WILL. YES,I UNDERSTAND.

I WILL. ALL RIGHT. SEE YOU SOON.

HEY,WHAT'S UP?

HI.

HEY,LISTEN,UH, I NEED TO TAKE A RAIN CHECK

ON OUR LITTLE PLAYDATE. GOT A LOT ON MY MIND...

NOT THAT I'M GOING TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT IT. WELL,THAT'S GOOD.

OKAY. UM... I'M GONNA GO TO WORK.

YEAH. OKAY,GREAT.

UH,OH,HEY,LOOK. I,UH,I'VE GOT

A FREE ROOM AND DINNER AT THE ATHENEUM HOTEL.

YOU KNOW, IF YOU WANTED TO JOIN ME

LATER TONIGHT, THAT'D BE GREAT.

WELL,TO THE ROOM, YES. TO DINNER?

DINNER LEADS TO TALKING. TALKING LEADS TO FEELINGS.

FEELINGS LEADS TO RELATIONSHIP. MM.

SO I'M GONNA HAVE TO PASS ON THAT. MM-HMM.

YOU LET ME KNOW WHEN YOU'RE IN THE MOOD AGAIN,OKAY? MM-HMM.

* SHE SAYS IT'S LOVE THAT GETS SO ROUGH ANNOUNCED *

* WELL,IF SHE'S SO PRONOUNCED *

HEY!

YOU GUYS SHOULD COME IN.

BUY ONE,GET ONE FREE. OPENING DAY SPECIAL. OH, SO I TAKE IT YOU AND BELLA

AREN'T GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY THEN?

NO,BELLA'S HOME WITH THE NANNY.

I HAVE TO STAY AT THE STORE TODAY. SURE. WORK IS JUST MORE IMPORTANT

THAN IT IS TO OTHERS.

I'M SURE THE NANNY'S A FINE SUBSTITUTE.

YOU KNOW WHAT? I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF YOU LADIES,

WITH YOUR MEAN LOOKS AND YOUR DISAPPROVAL.

COULD YOU BE MORE JUDGMENTAL?

I MEAN,YOUR WAY IS NOT THE ONLY WAY TO RAISE A CHILD.

MY MOTHER WAS CRAZY, AND I TURNED OUT JUST FINE.

EXCUSE US.

(singsong voice) THANK YOU.

AND BY THE WAY,THE NANNY- HE'S A GREAT KISSER!

WELL,THAT WENT PRETTY WELL,HUH?

(laughs) YEAH...

THEY'LL PROBABLY STOP BY LATER.

* LOVE *

I BET YOU KIDS HAD NO IDEA

THAT RIGHT HERE, IN THE MIDDLE OF YOUR CITY,

THERE WERE 3 MILLION FOSSILS BURIED FROM THE ICE AGE.

I LOVE "ICE AGE." IT'S MY FAVORITE MOVIE. MINE,TOO.

TRUTH BE TOLD,THAT MOVIE HAD A LOT OF BAD MISTAKES. DID NOT.

ACTUALLY,IT DID. I DON'T THINK

IT'S A VERY GOOD MOVIE AT ALL, FACTUALLY SPEAKING.

DADDY, WHAT'S HE TALKING ABOUT?

HOLD ON A SECOND.

MAYBE WE COULD TAKE IT EASY WITH THAT STUFF-

YOU KNOW,SABERTOOTHS DIDN'T ACTUALLY TALK. WE-WE GET IT.

ARE YOU GONNA HIT HIM?

WHAT? NO. YOU'RE- YOU'RE GONNA HIT ME?

NO. DADDY, ARE YOU GONNA HIT SOMEONE?

NO! HE HIT THAT MAN!

I DIDN'T HIT THAT MAN, OKAY,BOBBY?

YOU NEED TO MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS.

'CAUSE I'M STARTING TO GET A LITTLE MAD,

AND I DIDN'T GET A LOT OF SLEEP LAST NIGHT,OKAY? DID YOU APOLOGIZE TO HIM?

MY MOM SAID YOU HAVE TO APOLOGIZE

WHENEVER YOU MISBEHAVE. WOULD YOU LIKE TO SEE ME APOLOGIZE? FINE.

I'M SORRY THAT I HIT YOU THE OTHER DAY.

NO,THERE'S NO REASON TO APOLOGIZE.

YOU-YOU DIDN'T EVEN REALLY HIT ME.

IT WAS A NICE TRY,THOUGH.

OKAY? NOW I'M SORRY.

YOU HAPPY NOW,BOBBY?

I'M TELLING YOU,I DON'T WANNA GO. I DON'T EVEN LIKE PARTIES.

YOU'LL LIKE THIS ONE. YOU'LL GET FREE STUFF.

STEPH,LET'S JUST HANGUT UPSTAIRS.

I'M TOTALLY COOL WITH IT.

OR JUST COME OVER AFTER THPARTY.

I KNOW I LOOK RIDICULOUS.

NO,YOU DON'T. YOU LOOK... BEAUTIFUL.

SHUT UP. WHERE YOU GOING?

TO THE PARTY... WITH YOU. YOU'RE STILL GOI,RIGHT?

YOU CAN'T MAKE ME GO ALONE. STEPHANIE SAID YOU WERE COMING.

WOW. YOU TWO... I MUST HAVE AMAZING KARMA.

MOST GUYS' DOWNSTAIRS NEIGHBORS ARE OLD LADIES

OR WEIRD GUYS WITH PIMPLES, AND I HAVE,UH,YOU TWO.

AND LOOK AT LAURA! WHO KNEW THAT SHE HAD

SUCH A HOT BOD UNDERNTH THOSE SWEATS? YEAH.

FUNNY.

AND YOU LOOK PRETTY HOT YOURSELF.

JUST CHECKING. I DON'T HAVE TO ACT LIKE I DON'T KNOW YOU, DO I?

BECAUSE I DON'T WANNA GO IF- NO,NO,NO.

I HAVE IT ALL FIGURED OUT. WE'LL HAVE A SIGN

AND MEET UP IN THE BATHROOM

AWAY FROM THE CAMERAS SO WE CAN FOOL AROUN IN SECRET.

I'LL SCRAT MY NOSE.

A GIRL SCRATCHING HER NOSE IS... SO HOT.

SO ARE WE GOING? OH,WHO AM I TO SAY NO TO KARMA?

WHAT ARE WE DOING STILL STANDING HERE?

LADIES...

HMM.

I SAW YOU. SAW ME WHAT?

THIS REMINDS ME OF MY HIGH SCHOOL PARTIES.

YOU MUST HAVE GONE TO A SWEET HIGH SCHOOL. THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEAN.

I WOULD JUST STAND IN THE CORNER,

TALKING TO THE ONLY OTHER LOSER THERE. NO OFFENSE. NONE TAKEN.

BUT HERE'S THE THING- GIRLS WHO WERE LOSERS

DIDN'T HAVE IT AS BAD AS GUYS WHO WERE LOSERS.

THAT IS SUCH CRAP. YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO GET A STOMACHACHE GETTING UP

THE NERVE TO ASK THE GIRL YOU LIKEDO PROM,

ONLY TO HAVE HER SAY NO BECAUSE SHE ACTUALLY

HAD A CRUSH ON YOUR BEST FRIEND

AND DIDN'T WANT TO GIVE HIM THE WRONG MESSAGE.

BUT THAT NEVER HAPPENED TO YOU.

NO,BUT IT COULD HAVE.

UM,STEPHANIE'S SCRATCHING HER NOSE SO HARD

THAT SHE'S GONNA HURT HERSELF.

I GUESS I-I'D BETTER...

I JUST FEEL YOU CAN'T LIVE THE PART,

YOU CAN'T FEEL THE PART. YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING? UH-HUH. HEY!

HEY.

HEY,BRO. I'LL TAKE ANOTHER MARTINI.

TWO OLIVES THIS TIME. YEAH,YEAH. I'LL GET RIGHT ON THAT.

DID YOU JUST GIVE ME THE SIGN? Y OU HAVE TO GET ME AWAY FROM THIS GUY.

HEY,YOU'RE THAT ACTOR- JARED FOX.

INDEED. YOU SUCK.

THANK YOU!

GLAD I COULD HELP. I'LL,UM...

I'LL SEE YOU LATER.

WHERE WERE WE?

ADAM HILLMAN?

GUY ROWLAND.

PLEASURE. PLEASE... HAVE A SEAT.

YOU UNDERSTAND WHY WE'RE HERE,RIGHT?

THAT'S WHAT WE'RE ABOUT TO FIND OUT.

WELL,YOU SHOULD KNOW

THAT IF YOU DON'T AGREE WITH THIS AFFIDAVIT,

OR IF IT'S INACCURATE IN ANY WAY,

YOU SHOULDN'T SIGN IT.

WELL,THEN I PROBABLY SHOULDN'T WASTE MY TIME READING IT.

WE BOTH KNOW IT'S NOT ACCURATE.

I MEAN,UNLESS IT SAYS COOPERTON MANUFACTURING

SOLD FAULTY LOCKS TO CAR COMPANIES.

DOES IT SAY THAT, MR. HILLMAN?

NO,IT DOESN'T. DOES IT SAY THAT PEOPLE COULD DIE- THAT PEOPLE HAVE DIED-

BECAUSE OF THESE LOCKS?

YOU KNOW,MR. ROWLAND, THAT'S- BUT,HEY, WHAT'S A COUPLE OF LIVES

COMPARED TO A CHEAPER COST? IT'S ALL ABOUT

COST-BENEFIT ANALYSIS,RIGHT? YOU KNOW, MAYBE WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT THIS SOME OTHER-

IF I REALLY GAVE YOU THE TRUTH,

YOU'D HAVE NO CASE,

AND MY EMPLOYERS WOULD BE OUT OF BUSINESS.

BUT IF I SIGN,THEN IT'S ALL JUST AN ACCIDENT,RIGHT?

DON'T WORRY,HILLMAN.

I'M GONNA SIGN IT.

I WANT TO SIGN IT.

I'VE BEEN THINKING OF RETIRING

DOWN ISOUTH BEACH.

YOU THINK THE BIG BOSSES WOULD HAVE A PROBLEM WITH THAT?

COOPERTON'S OFFERING A REAL NICE RETIREMENT PLAN

FOR YOU TO LIVE COMFORTABLY WHEREVER YOU WANT.

WHERE DO I SIGN?

UNLESS YOU WANNA GIVE ME THAT SPEECH AGAIN.

OH,GREAT. THE FREE STUFF!

HMM...

I'VE ALWAYS WANTED ONE OF THESE.

THAT'S HOT.

YOU KNOW WHAT? WE SHOULD GO.

WE'VE BEEN HERE LONG ENOUGH.

YEAH. YEAH,WE SHOULD. THIS PARTY BLOWS.

I'LL GO TELL STEPHANIE.

STEPHANIE,I'M TAKING OFF.

WHY? IT'S SO EARLY.

I CAN'T GO JUST YET. IT WOULD LOOK REALLY BAD.

I'LL JUST- I'LL SEE YOU LATER THEN.

ARE YOU MAD?

NO. NO,I'M NOT MAD. I JUST...

I CAN'T DO THIS.

YOU KNOW,I'M THE ONE USUALLY EMBARRASSED

BY THE PERSON I'M DATING, NOT THE OTHER WAY AROUND.

I'M NOT EMBARRASSED BY YOU.

IT'S JUST THAT THIS IS SORT OF A BIG DEAL FOR ME.

I KNOW IT IS, AND YOU SHOULD ENJOY IT.

I'LL SEE YOU LATER.

WHY ARE YOU SO MAD? BECAUSE WE'RE SUPPOSED TO BE MOVING FORWARD,

AND YOU KEEP TAKING TWO STEPS BACK.

RICHARD PROVOKED ME,DEENA. WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO?

YOU HIT HIM EVERY TIME YOU SEE HIM?

JEEZDAVE. WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO SWITCH SCHOOLS. CAN I-CAN I EXPLAIN

OKAY,IT'S NOT EASY BEING NICE TO SOMEONE

WHO SLEPT WITH YOUR WIFE,DEEN. OKAY? IT'S JUST NOT.

IT BRINGS UP A LOT- BRINGS UP A LOT-

A LOT OF FEELINGS. CAN YOU UNDERSTAND THAT?

AND WHAT IS THIS? WHY-WHY DON'T YOU WANNA

TELL PEOPLE ABOUT US? WHAT ARE YOU AFRAID OF? I'M NOT AFRAID OF ANHING.

I JUST DON'T WANT PEOPLE TO GET THEIR HOPES UP. THEIR HOPES OR YOUR HOPES?

I DON'T KNOW. MAYBE. IS IT SUCH A SURPRISE

THAT I MIGHT NOT WANT TO GET HURT?

OH,GOD. LISTEN TO ME.

LOOK, I'M NOT GONNA HURT YOU.

WELL,YOU'RE OBVIOUSLY STILL ANGRY,

OR YOU WOULDN'T KEEP PUNCHING RICHARD.

MAYBE I PUNCHED RICHARD BECAUSE I WANT TO SHOW PEOPLE.

I WANNA TELL 'EM THAT YOU'RE MINE.

AND I WANT YOU TO TELL THEM.

WHAT IS THIS? WHAT ARE WE DOING?

WHY-WHY DO YOU GOT ONE FOOT OUT THE DOOR? I AM NOT KEEPING A

I'M TRYING TO PROTECT OUR CHILDREN

FROM ANOTHER HUGE DISAPPOINTMENT.

AND YOU KNOW WHAT?

I'M NOT GONNA TELL THEM OR-OR ANYONE ANYTHING

UNTIL YOU CAN SHOW ME THAT YOU CAN FORGIVE AND FORGET.

AND YOU KNOW, WHAT DO YOU DO?

YOU GO OUT AND YOU PUNCH RICHARD- N ONCE BUT TWICE.

YOU KNOW,I DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT SUZANNE.

I DON'T THINK ABOUT THE FACT THAT YOU SLEPT WITH HER.

IT'S JUST- IT'S GONE FROM MY MIND.

ALL I THINK ABOUT IT IS- IS US AND OUR FUTURE.

AND UNTIL YOU CAN DO THE SAME,

THEN YOU HAVE ONE MORE DAY

TI THOSE DIVORCE PAPERS EXPIRE.

IT'S ON YOU.

I REALLY WANT A VEGGIE DOG, BUT THAT'S PROBABLY

NOT THE WAY TO GO AT ONE OF THESE PLACES.

I WONDER IF THEY HAVE NACHOS.

I TAKE IT YOU DON'T WANNA TALK ABOUT TONIGHT.

UH,WHATEVER.

THERE'S NOTHING TO TALK ABOUT.

LISTEN,BRIAN, I LOVE STEPHANIE,

AND I KNOW HER BETTER THAN ANYONE.

SHE'S A SWEET PERSON.

BUT THIS THING THAT'S HAPPENING TO HER?

IT'S HUGE,AND IT'S WHAT SHE'S WANTED HER ENTIRE LIFE.

WHAT'S YOUR POINT? THAT IT'S NOT GONNA CHANGE. IT'S JUST GONNA GET WORSE.

THERE'LL BE MORE PICTURES

AND MORE ANNOYING PEOPLE WHO THINK YOU'RE A WAITER

AND REALLY, REALLY AWFUL PARTIES.

THAT PARTY WAS AWFUL.

I DON'T KNOW HOW SHE CONVINCED YOU TO GO.

HONESTLY?

I WANTED TO BE WITH YOU.

AND SLUG PHOTOGRAPHERS WITH MY PURSE

IF THEY TRIED TO TAKE YOUR PICTURE.

YOU'RE-YOU'RE ALWAYS LOOKING AFTER EVERYONE,BRIAN,

AND YOU NEED SOMEONE TO LOOK AFTER YOU.

I KNEW YOU LOOKED FAMILI.

YOU WERE IN "CELEBRITY BEAT," RIGHT? WITH STEPHANIE CONNER?

YEAH,YEAH,THAT'S ME.

YOU WANT MY AUTOGRAPH? UM...

I'M JUST KIDDING.

ALL RIGHT. WHAT DO YOU WANT? UM,LET'S SEE...

YOU-YOU WANT A SLAW DOG. I DO.

THIS IS UNEXPECTED. I DON'T DO UNEXPECTED.

YOU,UH, YOU LOOK PREY GOOD

IN YOUR HANGING AROUND THE HOUSE CLOTHES. STOP THAT.

WHAT? I'VE ONLY SEEN YOU DRESSED UP OR UNDRESSED-

NOTHING IN BETWEEN.

OKAY. U'RE FLIRTING WITH ME. ALL RIGHT?

ANOTHER RULE- NO FLIRTING UNLESS IN BED.

YOU KNOW,CAN WE JUST STOP WITH THE RULES,PLEASE?

LOOK,I NEED TO TALK TO YOU,OKAY?

I NEED TO TALK TO SOMEONE WHO WILL-WHO WILL UNDERSTAND.

WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'M GONNA UNDERSTAND?

WELL,I'M PRETTY SURE YOU'VE DONE SOMETHING

TO GET AHEAD IN YOUR CAREER-

SOMETHING THAT YOU KNEW WASN'T RIGHT,

BUT YOU DID IT ANYWAY. AM I RIGHT?

OKAY. ALL RIGHT. WE CAN TALK TONIGHT.

BUT THAT MEANS NO SEX.

YOU CAN N HAVE ONE OR THE OTHER, BUT NOT BOTH.

OKAY,I NEED TO TALK, BUT IF YOU TELL ANYONE

THAT I PICKED TAING OVER SEX,

I'LL DENY IT.

COME IN. ALL RIGHT.

AHEM.

AHEM.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

I'M GIVING YOU THE SIGNAL...

UNLESS YOU'RE EMBARRASSED BY ME.

LOOK, I'M SORRY ABOUT TONIGHT.

I'M STILL GETTING USED TO ALL THIS.

IS THE PARTY OVER?

NO,IT WAS JUST GETTING STARTED.

AND YOU STILL LEFT?

YEAH,I WAS LOOKING AROUND, HOLDING MY FREE PHONE,

AND I SAW ALL THESE OTHER PEOPLE

HOLDING THEIR FREE PHONES AND...

I KNOW.

IT SEEMED SO EMPTY AND MEANINGLESS.

NO,IT WAS ACTUALLY PRETTY FUN.

I JUST... WISHED THAT YOU RE THERE WITH ME...

YOU KNOW,TO ENJOY IT...

ANDTO GET YOUR OWN FREE PHONE.

ALL I KNOW IS THAT

I DEFINITELY DON'T WANNA SCREW US UP.

WAIT,HOLD ON. WE'RE AN "US"?

SERIOUSLY,THOUGH- NO MORE HIDING.

HOW ABOUT TOMORROW WE GO OUT,

AND I'LL BE YOUR ACCESSORY?

OR... WE COULD JUST STAY INLL DAY.

* IF YOU FEEL LIKE *

* EVERYTHING IS GONNA BE ALL RIGHT *

* AND MAKE ME FEEL LIKE *

* EVERYTHING IS GONNA BE ALL RIGHT *

* IT MAKES ME FEEL LIKE *

* EVERYTHING IS GONNA BE ALL RIGHT *

OH,I DON'T KNOW,HONEY.

DO YOU REALLY THINK THAT'LL WORK? WELL,OF COURSE IT WILL.

I'm gonna call Brian right now. Hopefully he'll agree.

I'LL MEET YOU IN THE STORE IN AN HOUR,OKAY? Okay.

GIRLS,WHO WANTS CUPCAKES FOR BREAKFAST?

I DO! I DO! I WANT SOME!

YEAH. I WANT VANILLA.

* I REMEMBER THE LIGHT *

* SHINING IN YOUR EYES *

* WHEN THE FIRE LIGHTS GO DOWN... *

HEY,NIC. YOU OKAY?

WAIT,YOU'RE- YOU'RE TALKING SO FAST,

I CAN BARELY MAKE OUT WHAT YOU'RE SAYING.

YEAH. YEAH,I'LL ASK.

ALL RIGHT. CALM DOWN. I'LL SEE YOU LATER.

HEY, REMEMBER WHEN YOU SAID

YOU WERE WILLING TO BE MY ACCESSORY FOR TODAY?

YEAH.

HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT CUPCAKES?

THESE ARE THE BEST CUPCAKES IN TOWN.

I TRY TO EAT AT LEAST ONE EVERY DAY,

ANY FLAVOR- ESPECIALLY THE RED VELVET.

I HOPE THIS ISORKING.

IT ALREADY IS.

I KNOW HOW TO GET A CROWD. SHE KNOWS HOW TO WORK ONE. IT'S TRUE.

MOMMY,LOOK WHAT I MADE. AW...

ISN'T THIS JUST THE BEST CUPCAKES?

SWEETIES, THOSE ARE BEAUTIFUL.

CAN YOU PLEASE-MWAH- GO MAKE ME SOME MORE?

OKAY.

OKAY.

HEY,YOU GUYS. THIS PLACE LOOKS AMAZING.

CONGRATULATIONS.

THANKS. NOW GIVE ME A CUPCAKE.

WELL,OF COURSE.

HEY,THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR BRINGING STEPHANIE.

SHE'S JUST AWESOME.

YEAH. YEAH, SHE'S ACTUALLY PRETTY GREAT.

THANK YOU.

I'M GONNA GO GIVE STEPHANIE SOME ADVICE

ON HOW TO HANDLE THE MEDIA.

YEAH... BABY,DON'T DO THAT. TRUST ME.

YOU KNOW STEPHANIE CONNER? UH,SHE GOES OUT WITH MY BROTHER.

YOU KNOW WHAT? YOU WERE RIGHT,

AND WE WERE BEING JUDGMENTAL. LOOK AT THIS PLACE.

IT'S DOING SO WELL, AND WE JT WOULD

REALLY LIKE TO BE A PART OF IT-

JUST TO SUPPORT ONE OF OUR OWN,YOU KNOW?

HUH. GREAT. THANKS. HEY,SO,NIC-

WHATEVER HAPPENED TO THAT GUY ADAM THAT YOU SLEPT WITH

WHO'S YOUR-YOUR BROTHER'S BEST FRIEND? RIGHT?

SO TELL ME. DID-DID YOU EVER TELL? PLEASE TELL ME SHE'S TALKING ABOUT

A DIFFERENT BROTHER AND A DIFFERENT ADAM. YEAH, I'M GONNA TAKE THIS.

IT DIDN'T RING. I KNOW.

I GOTTA GO MAKE SOME CUPCAKES.

HA! IT WASN'T ME.

CUPCAKES FOR EVERYO ON ME.

STEPHANIE CONNER'S IN THERE. YEAH.

THE PLACE IS GONNA BE HUGE NOW.

YOU SHOULD GET IN THERE WHILE YOU STILL CAN. YEAH. I KNOW.

DAVE, YOU WOULD NOT BELIEVE THE DAY

I HAD AT THE STORE TODAY. STEPHANIE CAME IN AND...

OH,DAVE.

HI.

HI. UH,WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

MOVING FORWARD. I'M OVER IT-

YOU KNOW,JUST,I'M DONE LIVING IN THE STORAGE CLOSET.

I'M SORRY.

* ONLY GET CLOSER... *

REALLY? 'CAUSE,UH,I THOUGHT

THAT MAYBE WE COULD,UH-

OH,NO,NO,NO,NO. LISTEN,LISTEN.

I'M MOVING OUT OF THE STORAGE CLOSET

SO I CAN BE UPSTAIRS...

WITH YOU.

* BE THE NEW ONE BURN TO SHINE *

WILL YOU,UH...

WILL YOU MARRY ME, DEENA GRECO...

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