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[music playing]

PHOTOGRAPHER: Excellent, Your Highness.

Beautiful.

[camera clicking]

Your Highness, would you raise your chin ever so?

[camera clicking]

Uh, I do apologize.

Oh, I'm sorry.

I assumed you were talking to me.

I thought--

When he said Your Highness, I--

CORALINA: No, no, no. Not at all.

You speak.

No, you first.

I insist.

Thank you.

Since we are both heirs to our respective thrones,

perhaps Your Highness might not be the most helpful

of addresses.

In the interest of efficiency over protocol,

might I suggest Prince Desmond and Princess Coralina

for the time being?

Would that be amenable, Your Highness?

Yes.

Excellent suggestion, Your Highness.

Wonderful.

Please go ahead.

Very well, Prince Desmond.

Would you raise your chin ever so?

[camera clicking]

CORALINA: Could I possibly get a touch up?

Sir, I've drafted an article for the media.

Clear, please.

Thank you.

After some intros, it reads, "The royal houses

of the monarchy of Vostieri and the kingdom of Androvia

announce the merging of their royal lines

with the engagement of the Crown Princess Coralina Eugenia

of Vostieri to Crown Prince Desmond Carlyle.

Both houses hope this joyous occasion will forge

a path towards reunification, thus easing

centuries' old tensions regarding the ownership

of the Alsinian province.

Yes, that's fine.

Although, we should perhaps include

something about the date.

Say that the wedding takes place in two months.

Oh, and perhaps a cheerful mention

of the historical and beautiful Castle Elora's

the location of the nuptials.

Both prized suggestions.

Princess Coralina, perhaps you could

move your hand onto his arms so that we

can see the yellow alexandrite?

Quite.

May I?

Here we go.

PHOTOGRAPHER: Perfect.

I believe we have it.

[chuckling]

Everything all right there, Edwin?

Never better, sir.

Merely attending to something that was crying out to be done.

You just seem a little upset by this turn of events.

I find this deeply offensive for two reasons, sir.

Firstly, it is a breach of protocol of the highest order.

And secondly, if royalty cannot be expected to hold

their commitments, what example does

that set for the rest of us?

But here I am, not attending to your heartbreak

after such treacherous perfidy.

How you must feel having a fiancee

so callously break off your engagement by eloping with a--

a plumber.

You must be devastated.

As devastated as one can be about someone

they've only met two and a half times, I suppose.

How can one meet someone half a time?

Oh, there was a video call that kept freezing.

Very awkward.

Oh.

Do try to keep in mind, Edwin, that this marriage was purely

a diplomatic union to shore up political relations

between the two countries.

It was arranged by our grandfathers

long before we were even born.

I do worry, though, without the merger of the two houses

where this territorial dispute might lead.

Still, she returned the ring promptly.

Please make sure that gets back to the royal vault.

Of course, sir.

And your parents are expecting you at breakfast.

Be warned, your father is not taking this as calmly as you,

sir.

Betrayal!

Utter betrayal!

This is an outright provocation!

Well, I hardly think it's up there

with the killing of Archduke Franz Ferdinand, Father.

I'm sorry, darling.

Who's been killed?

An Austrian fellow, Mama.

World War I.

Oh.

If things get worse, I'm sure the Vostieris

could blame us for that too.

Although, one might wonder how much this is political

and how much this is personal.

[french], were you not once friends with King Winston?

Well, that was when we were schoolboys, which seems

entirely beside the point.

His daughter has pushed us to the very brink.

Father, it's 8 o'clock in the morning.

I entreat you to find a diplomatic solution to this

and try to think of a plan B.

Oh.

[upbeat music]

Princess Coralina's elopement was most untimely.

not sure what we're going to do now.

It's just too bad that our royal air

force consists of two helicopters and the private jet.

We won't be going to war, Edwin.

There has to be a better solution.

Didn't Princess Coralina have a younger sister?

I believe so, Your Highness.

Yes, I recall now.

Princess Beatrix.

She dropped out of sight after some public blowback

to a picture in the press.

Oh, yes.

DESMOND: Yeah, I remember that picture, actually.

If you scroll down, you'll notice

there's a great deal of commentary on her appearance.

I shouldn't laugh.

The poor child was absolutely crucified.

No wonder she disappeared.

It was 20 years ago now.

Do you want me to track her down, sir?

Arrangements for a royal wedding back underway?

Do you know, I can't think of a better solution.

We'll be asking her to make a great sacrifice.

I know.

Not as big as sacrifices as we'd be asking our subjects

to make if our fathers can't put aside centuries of grievances.

Do it.

Let's just hope she's not secretly

dating the palace electrician.

[knocking]

BEATRIX: I'm hideous.

Don't come in.

I'm sure it's not that bad.

BEATRIX: Oh, trust me, it's an absolute disaster.

[snickers] I'm using my key.

Big meeting today.

We are so going to land it.

Oh, man, it smells awful in here.

What happened?

Why is it so dark?

We need some light in this situation.

[gasps]

Uh, honey, I am really sorry that this is happening,

but I gave you the entire weekend to be a puddle.

I even gave you my emergency breakup kit.

It was an emergency.

It was a breakup.

It's in the name.

I mean, Jared dumped me by text for a reality show influencer.

[whimsical music]

Well, I know, and he's a really big jerk

and has no idea what he lost.

But what do we tell our girls?

We are women of substance.

And we overcome substantial challenges.

Good girl.

Now, I know this is bad timing,

but we have that final presentation

to the Brahmin League this morning.

And you know that this investment

can secure our program for the next two years.

I know. Yeah.

Where's your phone?

I need to double check the address.

Oh, I don't exactly know where it is.

I was afraid I'd misery dial Jared,

so probably between the pint of ice cream

and the two boxes of milk duds.

OK.

Calling it.

[phone buzzing]

Oh, now I remember.

Here.

Uh, you have two dozen missed calls from the same number.

Is it Jared realizing he made a terrible mistake?

No, it is plus 56.

That's a foreign prefix.

You don't suppose there's a prince who

needs your help getting millions of dollars

out of the country, right?

[laughter]

Anyway, we should get you into the shower,

because we don't want the villagers

to come with the pitchforks and torches.

Well, it's Boston.

There's no villagers.

We have Bruins fans.

Same thing.

Less forgiving.

[phone buzzing]

It's that same number calling.

Do you want me to get it?

I love messing with scammers.

Oh, uh, no, you're good.

Do you want to make us some coffees?

- Yeah, sure. - OK.

Hello?

[speaking french]

CHLOE: Who was it?

You called it.

Nigerian prince wants my help, but he works in Bitcoin now.

CHLOE: Fancy.

I'll call us an Uber.

[chatter]

How long?

Says it should be here.

Oh, OK.

Uh, is that guy watching us through binoculars?

Just another birdwatcher.

Yeah.

Birding is very hip right now.

[upbeat music]

Sir, it's her.

CHLOE: The Allied STEM Foundation

for Young Women not only provides vital education and

mentoring in STEM coursework for underserved girls,

but we also teach leadership skills through workshops,

such as emotional intelligence, communication styles,

and conflict resolution.

This generous grant from the Brahmin League would.

Be so beneficial you wouldn't just

be making a difference in the lives of these young women,

you'd be investing in the future.

Thank you.

[whimsical music]

I couldn't tell if Mrs. Standish loved or hated us.

She was as expressive as dried concrete.

You know, she reminded me of my paternal grandmother.

She always did this thing where she'd--

Don't look, but I think that same guy is across the park.

Which guy?

I told you not to look.

Chloe, out of curiosity, how many true crime documentaries

did you watch this weekend?

Maybe half of one while I was doing laundry.

[phone buzzing]

OK, three.

But I swear that guy followed us here.

OK, well, let's--

let's just turn the corner.

Good plan.

I'll send a simple handwritten thank

you note and leave it at that.

Ooh, breaking out the stationery.

I like it.

Very classy.

Well, we just don't want her to think we're desperate.

Aren't we desperate, though?

No.

We give it a couple of months and we'll be desperate adjacent.

[laughs]

[suspenseful music]

Uh, I know you think I'm being paranoid,

but there is a black van following us.

No, no, don't turn around.

Jeez, you would be the worst spy ever.

Well, I'm sure there's no reason to panic just yet.

Why don't we cut through here?

We are definitely being followed.

I should have really, really, really

paid those parking tickets.

Oh, wait.

It went past. - OK, we're good.

We'll just cross the street up here and cut through the park

to the office.

OK.

Whoa!

My mom was right.

I moved to the big city, and now we're

going to end up on Dateline!

OK, we'll just go the other way.

OK.

This is real!

We're going to get kidnapped!

Or murdered.

Or kidnapped and murdered!

[screams]

OK, I think I'm the one they want.

You'll be fine.

Just stay back.

You will not get through to my friend

unless you go through me first.

Hiya!

[speaking french]

Wait, what is happening?

It's OK.

I just need to go with them.

Well, I'm not letting you get kidnapped without me.

[speaking french]

Bea, what's going on?

I'm not exactly sure.

[speaking french]

OK, that.

Since when do you speak French?

OK, there are some details I never told

you about me and my family.

You said your family was boring.

Wait, are they in the mafia?

Have you been lying to me?

No, they're not in the mafia, and no, I haven't lied to you.

And yes, my family is boring, just in a very specific way.

Like my mother, she's--

You said she's a housewife who does volunteer work.

Which is true.

It's just that her house is kind of a palace,

and she's kind of the queen there.

OK, so your mom is fancy and you guys have a big house.

No, it's really a palace.

Palace.

But you said your dad was a government administrator.

Right.

It's just that my father is also the king

of Vostieri, which is technically

an administrative position.

So you're not Bea Halston?

No, no, I still am your best friend from sophomore year.

It's just my full name is Beatrix Ileana

Halston Von Lindmore Eugard.

But some people refer to me as Princess Beatrix.

That makes me the bestie of Princess Beatrix of--

how do you pronounce your country's name again?

Oh, thank you.

Are you sure you're a princess, though?

Because we like boxed wine.

Also, we go to that discount pedicure place,

so you don't sound like a princess.

I took a year of intense diction classes

to master your accent.

Accent?

I don't have an accent.

Do I?

[speaking french]

[whimsical music]

Wow.

Do you think this is one of those kidnappings

where we can get room service?

We haven't actually been kidnapped.

Oh, but when I tell the story, and I will tell the story,

there will be kidnapping involved.

Your Highness.

I don't think he's the one you say that to.

Your Royal Highness, it is my honor

to introduce to you Prince Desmond,

Crown Prince of Androvia.

Seriously?

Wow.

Your Royal Highness.

It is a great honor to make your acquaintance.

Certainly.

The pleasure is all ours, Your Majesty.

May we present our companion, Miss Chloe Hargraves.

Miss Hargraves, an honor to make your acquaintance as well.

Likewise, I'm sure, Your Gracious Majesty, Sire, Royal--

That's not a thing.

OK, got it.

We've been trying throughout the weekend, Princess,

to make contact with you through phone calls and email.

We were inconvenient as of the weekend

and not accepting correspondence.

Understood.

Well, then, perhaps we might confer more privately now.

Prince Desmond, since we are outnumbered

and at a political disadvantage, we

would insist that our friend bear witness to whatever

conversation shall ensue.

Very well.

Since the dissolution of a united Vestrovia some 300 years

ago, there has been an ongoing dispute regarding

rightful ownership of the Alsinian province and

the Castle Elora.

It is our hope that Her Highness is

aware of elevated tensions between Androvia and Vostieri

on this matter.

Is it the intention of His Highness

to educate us on the history and situation in our own homeland?

Well, given that Her Highness has

been absent from her royal duties for some 20 years,

one was not to presume anything about what

sort of connection she may or may not have with Vestrovia.

As a matter of fact, we are fully

aware of the crown prince's failed engagement

to our sister, Coralina.

May we offer our belated congratulations and condolences.

How very kind of Your Highness.

Although, perhaps that failure is a matter best discussed

with one's own sister.

And when doing so, please do extend our heartiest

congratulations on her recent nuptials to a plumber,

I believe. - Indeed.

It will be so lovely having a member of the royal family

who actually has a useful skill.

But I doubt His Majesty came all this way

to discuss failed engagements.

We can't help but wonder if there is perhaps

a point to this meeting.

Indeed, there is.

In fact, the entire point of the aforementioned failed engagement

was to form an alliance through marriage between the ruling

houses of Duvalier and Vostieri in the hopes

that we might form a legitimate path

towards a reunited Vestrovia, and thus prevent

further escalation of tensions.

Understood.

But since that plan did not come to fruition,

we are loath to consider what alternative might be proposed.

Interesting choice of verbiage.

[whimsical music]

[murmurs]

Perhaps, in the light of the state of this meeting,

His Highness may prefer not to proceed.

His Highness has very little choice.

Since Princess Coralina was required to abdicate her claim

to the throne by marrying a commoner,

it would seem that you are now crown princess.

And as crown prince of Androvia, it

is my great honor to most graciously

seek your hand in marriage.

[chloe gasps]

[phone chimes]

So that happened.

OK, what is with all the accents?

I've known you for 20 years.

Have you been pretending this whole time?

Who's the real you?

This is Bea, your best friend since college.

This is Princess Beatrix Ileana Halston Von Lindmore Eugard

of Vostieri.

And I suppose this is me, Beatrix, who

is also in a bit of a pickle.

It must be exhausting to be all of those people.

Just be you.

Thank goodness.

Besides, I don't think you're in a pickle.

Friday, your boyfriend dumps you by text,

and then Monday, another guy flies

2,000 miles to propose to you.

And not just any other guy.

A crown prince proposed to you.

Best rebound ever.

And you turned him down cold.

You truly are a girlboss.

Ugh, Androvians.

They're so pushy and arrogant I bet it was his grandfather who

came up with the age-old solution of intermarriage

in the first place.

Is that really the only option?

My sister says there's a summit between our two kingdoms

in a few days, so surely my father

will come up with a better solution than marrying me off

to some polo playing prince.

Is there a chance that maybe you're judging him a little bit

harshly?

Look at this.

OK.

There he is, looking princely and--

wait, is that your sister?

She's so pretty.

Right?

Yeah, I've only heard that my whole childhood.

Your sister's so pretty.

Touched a nerve, did we?

Sorry.

But that's not the photo I'm talking about.

It's-- it's this one.

[laughs]

This one, and this one, and this one.

[laughs]

OK, I don't think I've actually ever seen

anyone playing polo before.

Do you remember in college when we

vowed never to date a golf bro?

Ugh, golf.

Well, polo bros, they're, like, 100 times worse.

I'm sure he's the type who never shuts up about it.

He looks pretty cute on a horse, though.

Oh, the Vostieris.

They're all so pushy and arrogant.

One might have thought that the princess would have

been much more appreciative, given

all the trouble you've gone to.

I mean, haven't I kept a low profile?

Indeed. Just the private jet.

Skeletal staff.

Of 12.

I've taken all the trouble to come here, completely incognito,

and meet this rogue princess to offer her the only way that I

can see out of a dire situation, only to be informed

that she is inconvenienced.

In my opinion, sir, when she said she must politely decline,

I didn't think she was being that polite.

Then again, sir, it seems your father has agreed to a summit

meeting with King Winston.

Perhaps clearer heads will prevail at last.

One can only hope, Edwin.

[classical music]

Richmond, it's been ages since I've seen you in person.

And yet, somehow, not long enough.

You're looking so much older.

Some of us are comfortable in our own skin.

Speaking of your skin, I'm sure Leupinia would love the name

of your plastic surgeon.

Your Highnesses, might I suggest we start

with an official photograph?

Happy to.

Certainly.

[camera clicking]

Might I suggest as well shaking of hands?

Why, Winston, your handshake feels just as weak as when we

were boys in boarding school.

Would you say as weak as your economic recovery?

Or as weak as your foreign policy?

Well, certainly nothing could be as weak as your central bank.

BEATRIX: That bad, huh?

I told Papa not to let King Richmond push his buttons.

Papa said he's not a machine.

He doesn't have buttons.

He's never been great with metaphors.

We are quite literal people.

Well, since the summit was a failure,

that does leave you in a rather delicate position, [french].

If you were to reconsider and accept the prince's proposal,

it might help settle things, just until there

could be a diplomatic solution.

I realize I have no room to tell you what to do,

and I'm so sorry I didn't give you any warning

before my elopement.

But it was sudden and crazy and perhaps

the first unpremeditated, selfish thing I've ever done.

Are you having regrets?

Are you kidding?

This is the happiest I've been in my entire life.

[speaking french] I won't begrudge you that.

I'm not thrilled by the change in my situation,

but you've allowed me to live a very private

life for a very long time.

I suppose I could reconsider and accept his proposal,

but only in the hopes that we can come to a better solution.

You are being most gracious about all of this.

I just want you to know it's not lost on me, [french].

I appreciate that.

Somebody got croissants from Monica's.

I've got to go, but please give my love to Mummy and Papa,

OK?

When you used to say that your sister was a princess,

I thought she was just spoiled.

But now that I know she's an actual princess,

it's kind of weird.

Things are definitely weird, and the summit, not a success.

So does that mean you're reconsidering the engagement?

I think I have to.

Come on, what do we tell our girls?

Once we decide what needs to be done, we do it.

[vocalizing]

(SINGING) Everybody's watching

Everybody's waiting

Greetings, Your Highness.

Prince Desmond is momentarily detained.

I see.

Are we sure this isn't one of those things

where I am to be kept waiting as a subtle power play?

Honestly, Your Highness, do you read this much

into every interaction?

Only ones this fraught.

How refreshingly blunt you are.

And how craftily ironic you are.

I don't know if this is an attempt

to intimidate me or charm me.

It is my attempt to cut through the royal double talk.

If it's charm you're looking for, you have the wrong sister.

Welcome.

Would Your Highness care to join us?

Are we meeting in your bedroom?

Oh, goodness, no.

We thought we might have supper on the balcony

with Your Highness.

Indeed.

But in the interest of direct communication,

may we please stop speaking in the royal we?

Yes, we can.

I mean, yes, you and I can.

Please.

[romantic music]

Thank you.

Oh, no, wait.

Sorry, I'm confused.

I was told that you had reconsidered my proposal.

Well, yes.

In light of the failure of the recent summit,

I find myself so inclined.

OK.

It's just, you surprised me.

I thought we'd go out on a date.

I think we're a little bit beyond dating

territory, aren't we?

Yes, but just something a little more romantic.

Ah.

Candles, the moonlight, those little flowers.

Thought this was romantic.

It's fine.

Princess, I may be naive when it comes to affairs

of the heart, but I do know enough to know

that when a woman says something is fine,

then it doesn't mean it's good.

I did put some thought into this.

Yes, your wait staff did a lovely job.

Now, why does that sound like a slight?

- I don't want to argue. - It was definitely a slight.

I just thought we could go out to a restaurant, that's all.

A restaurant?

I'm sorry.

I'm just having trouble even picturing

what that would look like.

I suppose we could ask Edwin to put together a security detail.

Could we discuss this privately?

By all means.

Ah.

Would you mind giving us a few moments?

I'm sorry, I'm just attended on so often I

forget that they're even there.

Let's run out for pizza.

I'm sorry, Princess.

I don't think you understood.

I'm saying that we can't do that without security.

No, I don't think you understand.

Where does that door go?

According to the security briefing,

to some service elevator, I think.

So?

Let's run out for pizza.

Really?

Could we really do that?

Look, in Boston, I'm a nobody, at least until we

announce our engagement.

And I don't think anyone's up to date

with princes from small European monarchies.

Well, I have featured on some quite prominent

eligible bachelor lists.

If we scruff you up a bit, we might look like just

a normal couple out for a date.

It's just I've never really done anything like that before.

Well, tonight might be our last chance.

The princess and I are at a very delicate and tense stage

of diplomatic negotiations.

We'd very much like to be left alone.

Indeed, sir.

Alone, Edwin.

BEATRIX: Remember, if anyone asks, you're a PhD student.

Why can't I just be a local Bostonian?

Well, first, because they're called townies, and second,

because you don't have sweats.

I remind you that the purpose of this trip

was to propose to a princess.

I didn't think sweats would be appropriate.

So you have sweats?

Well, at least you know what those are,

so that's encouraging.

Oh, may I?

There.

Do I look like an astronomy student?

Look at you with the backstory.

Astronomer?

I like it.

Personal interest?

I dabble.

All right.

Now or never, I suppose.

Exactly.

[upbeat music]

Take a breath.

We're sneaking out for pizza, not nuclear secrets.

Where are we going anyway?

This place Chloe and I used to go in grad school.

The pizza is so greasy, but it's so good, and the beer is cold.

Oh, you like beer, right? - Oh, yeah.

I'll have you know that we have some excellent breweries

in Androvia, so yes, I do drink beer.

How sheltered do you think I am?

Cool hats.

That looks good on you.

Thank you.

Yes?

Oh, yeah.

I suppose I have to pay for this.

Yes.

One second.

I-- the thing is I don't actually have any money.

I've never carried a wallet before.

And that's exactly how sheltered I think you are.

Don't worry.

Tonight's on me.

Well, in that case, we'll take this as well.

Thanks.

To going off the tether.

Hm.

Hm.

You know, I've never been allowed to make foolish mistakes

or youthful indiscretions.

My whole life's been so meticulously planned.

Even my polo playing, it's all orchestrated.

Polo?

But I've seen the pictures.

No, it's an annual photo shoot against a green screen.

In fact, I've fallen off so many horses

that I'm expressly forbidden, in the interests

of protecting the royal lineage, from being on horseback.

But I thought Androvians were supposed

to be legendary polo players?

What's wrong?

Nothing's wrong.

You were right.

This is absolutely fantastic.

[laughs]

It's called bowling.

Do you want to try it?

Bowling, you say?

Yeah.

Let's give it a go.

OK.

Come on, come on, come on, come on.

Oh.

DESMOND: That was good, right?

It's been a while.

OK, your turn.

Uh, you might want to step back a little bit.

Back, back, back, back, back, back, back, back.

And remember what I told you.

So you hold the ball up, wind back, take a few steps,

and release.

Are you kidding?

That was great.

Thank you.

Don't leave me hanging.

Oh, yeah, that thing you do.

[cheering]

Excuse me.

When you knock all the things down, is that what you do?

You do that little dance?

I mean, you know, it doesn't happen all the time,

but when it does, you've got to celebrate.

All right.

MAN: Hey!

Well done.

Don't leave me hanging.

Am I picking up date night vibes?

I know that look.

I know that look.

Hey, baby. Come on.

Let's buy them a round.

Oh, we just came back from our honeymoon

ourselves, so stay right there.

Let me strike in.

You jerk.

You've been messing with me this whole time.

You assumed that I didn't know what bowling was.

You didn't say you were good at it.

I didn't say that I wasn't.

But you think that I'm hopeless and sheltered.

I'd say this one's on you.

OK, maybe I had that coming.

I don't get it.

You don't play polo, but you're this bowling champ?

That's completely true.

Yes, when mechanized bowling was first invented,

it became something of a sensation in Androvia.

And my great grandfather, who insisted

that we be modern in all things, he

built a two-lane alley in the basement of the palace.

I discovered it when I was in my early teens.

When my royal duties became just too much to bear, that alley,

it became a refuge for me.

Well, considering how good you are,

you must have spent a lot of time there.

You're not the only one who had a difficult time adjusting.

Here we go.

Ah.

Thank you.

Yes.

[all laughing]

Hey, guys, do you have a car or should we

drop you off someplace?

Oh, that's so nice of you, but I think that's our Uber just

pulling around now.

Oh, well, it was really fun meeting you guys.

I hope we can get together again.

We've been trying to make more couple friends.

We could have couple friends.

Well, you guys have our contacts,

so let's try to keep in touch.

All right.

That's my wife.

Don't mind her.

She's a hugger.

OK, bye.

Great to meet you.

- You too. - Pleasure meeting you.

Yeah, it was great to meet you both.

- Bye. - Bye.

See you around.

This is just the night that I needed.

I have to admit it, I can't remember the last time

I had this much fun.

[phone ringing]

Oh.

"Androvian crown prince unaccounted for.

Kidnapping, not ruled out, claims personal assistant."

[whimsical music]

I think we're in trouble.

Where have you been, sir?

I've been worried sick and entertaining

the most dire possibilities.

Such as what, Edwin?

Kidnapping attempt?

No.

In fact, we just went out for a little pizza.

Pizza can be delivered.

This is quite unlike you, sir.

I'm so sorry.

This is my fault.

No, it isn't.

I went of my own free will.

And for your information, I had rather a fantastic time.

Well, that seems entirely beside the point.

Well, I'll inform the king and queen that you have

not been abducted as feared.

Now, it would seem that the best way to defuse this escalation

in tensions would be to announce your engagement

as soon as possible.

So, Princess Beatrice, you will be back here at 9:00 AM

sharp for your official photo.

I have a meeting.

Your Highness, I realize this must all

feel like a terrible inconvenience for you,

but you were almost in the middle

of an international incident this evening.

Through no fault of her own.

Be that as it may, we need to push

things along here for the people of both your countries.

Thank you, Your Highnesses.

We'll send a car in the morning.

[whimsical music]

No.

Oh, that's ghastly, darling.

Ma cherie, you can't wear any of those.

They'll think he's marrying an American.

Seeing your wardrobe is making me feel quite sad,

like we haven't supported you.

Well, that was the whole point.

I wanted to support myself.

And I didn't mean to make you sad.

This is supposed to be good news.

Of course I'm pleased.

You're doing your country a great service.

And, personally, I'm thrilled to have my baby closer to home.

But I just hate to think--

Hate to think what?

MOTHER: I know how hard-won your privacy has been.

I fear we're letting you down.

Making sacrifices for the greater good is what we do,

Mama.

You married Papa at 20.

What was that like?

I'll admit, it was quite an adjustment.

But then again, I was raised for this sort of thing.

You, ma cherie, you're educated and accomplished,

but I fear you're unprepared.

Well, you've supported everything I've ever done,

so that's the best preparation I could ever hope for.

Perhaps.

Then again, we prepared Coralina,

and look how that turned out.

Well, I hate to cut this short,

but I think my car's going to arrive any minute.

Give my love to Papa.

Of course.

OK.

[french]

[door opens]

Right.

You won't be needing whatever's in there.

Follow me.

[upbeat music]

How are we progressing?

I just worry that all of this, it's not me.

Well, Your Highness, if I may, you have

not been for over two decades.

By that, I mean Princess Beatrix of Vostieri.

Now, she's in there somewhere, and we mean to find her,

no matter how long it takes.

Now, everyone, let's get this done.

[upbeat music]

PHOTOGRAPHER: Your Highnesses, can you

get closer together, please?

Can you switch sides, please?

Could we see the yellow alexandrite, please?

[light music]

Oh, wow.

Oh, hello. Hi.

Excuse me.

Excuse me.

I think they're finally leaving.

I'm so glad you're here.

It's been chaos.

Thank you.

I know.

It's crazy, right?

I kind of just miss that one guy with binoculars.

Anyway, have you checked your work email?

Suddenly, the Brahmin League can't

wait to be in business with us.

And you have invitations to a bunch of galas.

Well, don't tell my mother.

She'll send gowns.

Ooh. You think she'll send me one?

If only we could take advantage,

but, unfortunately, there's bigger issues brewing at home.

Now that I know that this isn't your home,

I've been doing some research.

Your foreign minister has been stoking quite

a bit of nationalistic fervor, which seems ironic, considering

the fact that the Androvians and Vostieris used to be

one big country originally.

So it's sort of like the Capulets and the Montagues,

or Ewing and Barnes.

But if they were one big country originally,

then why did they separate?

Well, it was 300 years ago.

The king died without a clear heir,

two families lay claim to the throne,

and it created this big mess, which eventually

divided the countries.

So now, in order to calm the rhetoric,

Desmond and I have to turn on the charm offensive.

His jet leaves for Androvia tomorrow night.

So clear your schedule and pack your bags.

You want me to come with you?

No, I need you to come with me.

I feel like things are about to get very weird,

and I need someone I can trust in my corner.

And I can't think of anyone else I'd rather

have as my maid of honor.

Seriously?

I'd be so honored.

Yay!

I'm showing up for the trip in a scarf

and big Jackie O sunglasses.

OK.

[laughter]

[knocking]

[background chatter]

Oh, hi.

Miss Hargreaves.

Always a pleasure.

I heard you were joining us.

I sure am.

It's hard to imagine flying without putting

my shoes in a tub first.

Indeed.

BEATRIX: Hello, Edwin.

Your Highness.

Ah, this will not do.

This you might find a little more appropriate.

Oh.

That looks a bit much for travel.

And the Androvian jet awaits us.

Do you think it's as posh as we see in magazines?

I love free food.

We have all amenities onboard.

Food service, chilled champagne, and in-flight TV.

In fact, His Highness has asked that we screen his favorite film

this evening, The Big Lebowski

Oh.

That tracks.

The dude abides.

Indeed he does.

[shouting]

Just give us your best smile, Your Highness,

and hightail for the van.

Come on.

Yes, very good.

Very good.

Oh.

Hello.

Hi.

Miss Hargraves, come.

[music playing]

(SINGING) I want to be the king of it all

I want to have a good time, good time

So give it to me

Give it to me Give it to me

Give it to me

Oh, oh, the king of it all

I want to have a good time, good time

Give it to me

Give it to me

Give it to me

Wow

Want it and you got it

Cool.

[classical music]

Your Majesties, might I present my fiancee,

Princess Beatrix Ileana Halston Von Lindmore Eugard of Vostieri.

And, Princess, might I introduce the royal family of Androvia.

My father, King Richmond, and my mother, Queen Leupinia.

It's a pleasure to make your acquaintances.

You're quite a bit taller than the other one.

Yes, Your Majesty.

My apologies for that.

Hm.

Oh, that's quite all right.

You don't need to unpack for me.

OK, please proceed.

[knock]

You know, there is a nice lady unpacking

my underwear into a lavender-scented

tissue paper drawer.

I thought we were only staying one night.

Well, we're supposed to do a tour of Castle Elora tomorrow.

Oh. [knock]

Oh, no.

OK.

Your Highness, Miss Hargraves, in an effort

to win over Androvians, we've planned a photo op for an hour

from now.

It will be very simple.

You and the prince will go out the front entry of the palace,

descend the steps, and wave to a select group

of locals and photographers, who will be

gathered outside of the gate.

Then you will return to the palace.

Easy as that.

Should we perhaps go outside the gate

and greet them personally?

Goodness, no.

We merely want them to get a look at you.

We've timed it so the sun will be perfect for your angular

angles.

But no selfies, and there will be

no tabloid photographers there.

You will wear these, and this will be the gown you're wearing.

That looks a tad long.

There won't be time for a proper hem.

We'll get a seamstress to pop in a couple of stitches

and hope for the best, all right?

[snaps]

Whoa.

He's like Cinderella's fairy godmother.

If she didn't like Cinderella in the least.

[trumpets playing]

[gasps]

[upbeat music]

It's like being 13 all over again.

Except this time I'm a meme that will last forever.

Hey, what do we tell our girls?

You are the author of your own story.

Don't let others control your narrative.

Oh.

[yawns] I'm sorry.

I'm jet lagged, and I didn't expect tagging along

with royalty to be so tiring.

Also, that bed in there is calling my name.

Did you know those sheets are hand-stitched by Italian nuns

who are selected for their tiny hands?

I looked it up.

OK, you go get some sleep.

And remember, we'll laugh about this in the morning.

BEATRIX: Well, I hope so. Night.

Night, night.

[light music]

[whimsical music]

Can I help you with something, lass?

Just, we're not supposed to have visitors

this late in the kitchen.

Sorry to bother.

I couldn't sleep, and I thought maybe a cup of chamomile tea

might help.

Ah, you must be the American friend of the princess.

You could have just rung down for it.

Actually, I'm the princess friend of the American.

Oh.

I didn't recognize you, Your Highness.

Well, you must have missed today's latest internet story.

Don't worry about those photos.

Come on.

Oh, you're in luck.

Kettle's still hot.

Thank you.

You know, when I married my Humphrey, I didn't eat for days.

And by the time the priests were giving us our vows,

I faint dead away.

Vulgata over gums right off the altar.

Humphrey couldn't find the top half of me for all the tulle.

But by the time reception were in full swing, even

I were laughing at it.

And I think it's good for the people

to see that royals are human too.

If anyone's asking my opinion.

[phone rings]

Oh, sorry.

How can I help you, Your Highness?

Straight away, Your Highness.

Kettle's just boiled.

Would you allow me to take it?

We can't have a princess going about like a kitchen maid.

Oh, no one will mind.

And I am his fiancee, after all.

Well, against my better judgment,

I don't suppose it could hurt.

[giggles]

Enter.

Thank you.

You can just set my tea on the side table there.

By all means, Your Highness.

What-- what are you doing in my bedroom?

What, so it's OK for your kitchen maid

to see you in your pajamas but not your own fiancee?

No, it's just you startled me.

I wasn't expecting you.

Why are you delivering my tea?

Well, I too couldn't sleep, so I imposed

myself on your kitchen staff.

Ah.

Then you managed to make it up the stairs

all right without falling over?

Why couldn't you sleep?

I'm just trying to take mind off the lurking suspicion that

responsibility for de-escalating the situation

seems to have fallen entirely on our shoulders.

I know.

Well, there's a book I can give you

called Economies of Conflict, which might explain why.

I've read that book.

Yeah, thought it was quite good.

You didn't tell me why you were not sleeping.

I'm making a mess of things.

No, you're not.

This is how it's always been for me, always a little off.

I'm trying to be better.

Less how I am naturally.

I wish you wouldn't.

I like you just how you are.

You should teach a class on authenticity at princess school.

You laugh, but that is part of the leadership

program at my foundation.

Yes, I heard about that.

Girls in STEM, isn't it?

Mm-hmm.

DESMOND: Tell me about it.

OK, Your Highness.

But just remember, you asked.

Consider, if you will, the messages we send our children.

Throughout history, only half the population

has ever been invited to adventure, explore, and

engage in the world, half the time actively

creating issues in their wake.

You mean men like our grandfathers?

Precisely.

Now consider the stories we tell our girls.

It's usually some put upon princess

forced to marry a dull prince.

I'm not sure how I feel about that description.

My point is, the story usually ends at her marriage,

never to be spoken of again.

But what if the princess was prepared to think not just

about her advantageous marriage, but

the problems facing her society and their possible solutions?

Princess being metaphorical in our case, of course.

In Chloe's case.

Yes.

So we opened it up to any girl who had the mind for it.

We gave them the opportunity, the access,

the tools, so we can reframe the narrative for the future.

Interesting.

Right?

Wait, which part?

The part where you, an actual princess,

were forced to marry a prince, because that's

what princesses do when they're faced with problems

in their societies.

Except this prince isn't very dull.

[laughs]

Ready for this?

[upbeat music]

[applause]

Everything all right?

I'm just doing what you suggested

and being authentically myself.

[cheering, applause]

Hi.

- Hello. - Hello.

Hi.

Thanks for coming.

Lovely to meet you.

Princess, please can I take selfie?

Oh, of course, yes.

Should we take a selfie?

Oh, yes.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

Oh.

Hello there.

Thank you so much.

Oh, that's beautiful.

[giggling]

Your Highness, the Vostieris have arrived early.

There's already some scuttlebutt about which family

gets the room with the sun, so can you

and the princess please return to the castle

before things escalate?

All right.

Goodbye, everyone.

Thank you.

[music playing]

See, you did it.

Ready to meet my family?

I can't wait.

Don't get too excited.

MOTHER: Ma cherie. - Hello.

Bea.

You're here.

Well, I'm just so glad to finally see you, my darling.

I was afraid those awful Androvians

had taken you hostage and were keeping

you from your loving family.

Darling, what have you been doing to your hair?

I love it.

Oh, well, it's not as perfect as [french].

Stop.

Don't even get me started.

I am a wreck.

Ah.

But please allow me to introduce you to my husband.

You must be--

I am.

The plumber, yes.

But you can call me Cody.

I've been looking forward to meeting you.

I've only got two brothers, so it will delight

me to have you as a sister.

How lovely.

May I introduce Miss Chloe Hargraves, my friend

and foundation partner.

It's such a pleasure to be joined by another commoner.

We should form an alliance, you and I, no?

I get it now.

[classical music]

[cameras clicking]

What a surprise it was upon hearing about your early arrival

here.

I'm sure you know what it's like to suddenly crave

the fresh air of the mountains, especially

since your capital is a seaport and does smell so of fish.

Unlike your capital, which smells of old cheese and

disappointment.

Your Majesties, may we invite you

to proceed to the dining hall?

Oh, all right.

Smell?

Prince Desmond, any comment on your second engagement

in two months?

Only to say that I'm entirely delighted by the circumstances

that have brought Princess Beatrix and I together.

And, Princess Beatrix, any comments on the fact

that your approval ratings in Androvia have gone up 73%?

Has it?

I'm afraid things have been quite topsy turvy lately,

so I wasn't aware.

EDWIN: Your Highness.

[chatter]

REPORTERS: Princess Princess.

Princess Coralina, are you at all disappointed

that you're sacrificing becoming queen by marrying a commoner?

Well, real love is never a sacrifice.

REPORTERS: Aw.

Excuse me.

Are you a member of one of the families?

No, I'm Chloe.

I'm the best friend of the bride.

Wrap it up.

Miss Hargraves, at the risk of appearing chivalrous,

might I escort you inside?

Will this start a rumor that we're dating?

Perish the thought.

[cough]

Did you hear him?

The nerve, implying that simply because our beautiful capital

is also a seaport that it smells like fish.

Absurd.

Of course, dear.

But then again, you don't stray that far from the palace,

but I get out and about with my charity work at times,

and I dare say the docks on the far side of the harbor, well,

they do have a certain aromatic quality.

Oh, darling.

Do try the Brie.

It's exquisite.

Wow.

Vostierian cheese.

Some of the best in the world.

Look at him down there.

So smug.

Cheese and disappointment.

He's the one who'd know what disappointment smells like.

Darling, with all your fretting,

you're letting your ceviche get cold.

Ceviche is always cold, Mama.

You're right.

Which one do I mean?

Oh, I don't know offhand, but you really must try it.

It's quite delicious.

I do hope after the wedding, we get more Androvian seafood.

How are you adjusting to your return to public life?

You know, perhaps I can relate on a small level.

Until I married your sister, unless water

was spraying from a faucet, no one cared what I did.

I must say, it's been quite disorienting.

I'm not used to being fussed over.

It's all this poking and prodding

and focus on my appearance, which

takes some getting used to.

Well, perhaps I can sympathize.

I have found it a little unsettling for myself also.

The work I do is with my hands, not my face.

Why should this matter?

Oh, it matters.

Right?

[classical music]

I suppose that dinner went as well as expected.

At least no one threw anything.

Small blessings, right?

I just hope the wedding goes half as well.

It will.

Oh, girl, you always beat me at this game.

I don't even know why I try.

Here, just take the whole deck.

Take it.

I am going to go and Insta stalk Cody,

see if he has any brothers.

Good luck.

Nighty night.

Night.

[whimsical music]

We have to stop these late night rendezvous

or else people will start to talk,

and then we shall have to get married.

Can you imagine?

I want to show you something.

[light music]

You know, I don't wish to alarm you, but when I was a boy,

I heard a tale that this tower was haunted

by my great, great, great grandmother,

Gertrude, who died here rather than surrender it to your lot,

Vostieris.

Well, I was told the ghost was a distant cousin who

died defending it from the Androvians.

Ah.

You don't suppose that perhaps our educations were skewed

in such a way as to paint in a more favorable light

our respective families, do you?

What?

Are you implying that it wasn't entirely

true when I was told the Vostieris basically

invented civilization?

Just speculating.

[clatter]

Did you hear that?

Where are you taking me?

You'll see.

Yeah, no, but actually where?

This is what I wanted to show you.

DESMOND: Wow. How did you know about it?

Well, for a while, as a girl, I

would obsess over the schematics of all the castles,

certain that I would find a secret passage

leading to hidden treasure.

[laughs] Unfortunately, I never thought to look

for a hidden bowling alley.

Who knows what we'll see.

But you once told me that you wanted to study astronomy.

Wait, it's early August.

Did you bring me here to see the Perseids?

Tonight, the meteor shower is supposed to peak.

Brilliant.

Brilliant.

There's one.

Look, there's another one.

I can't tell if you're just indulging me

or you genuinely get excited every time you see another one.

Surely you've seen shooting stars before.

Of course I have.

But it doesn't matter if you've seen 100,000 of them.

It doesn't mean that each one can't

have its own unique beauty.

I imagine that's what it's like to be in love.

Doesn't matter if you've been with someone for years.

Your heart still skips a beat every

time they walk in the room.

Imagine?

You make it sound like you've never been in love before.

I don't suppose I have.

Not really.

Well, of course, there was an infatuation or two

at university, but the engagement--

I was betrothed to your sister before I

even knew what a crush was.

Hm.

I'm actually really sorry that didn't work out.

I'm also really sorry you had to settle for the spare.

My sister certainly would never trip over her hem.

In fact, she's much better suited

to all the required pageantry than I am.

I can't say I'm disappointed.

I also don't think your sister would ever

remember some throwaway comment about astronomy,

bring me up on this roof to see this.

[romantic music]

Look at that one.

[soft music]

[gasps]

Desmond.

Desmond, wake up.

Just five more minutes.

This is the nicest sleep I've had for weeks.

Knowing Edwin, he's probably already

alerted the authorities I've done something nefarious to you.

Let's hope nobody's noticed we've gone.

Yes, let's hope.

[whimsical music]

Allow me to help you with that.

Stuck.

We're trapped up here.

What?

What are we going to do?

Ah.

Just kidding.

Imagine how awkward that would have been, though.

You're evil.

My heart stopped.

Where have you two been?

We've had the entire staff looking for you.

Yes, I'd say the thing about that is that--

I'm sorry.

It's my fault.

Again?

Your Highness, you appear to becoming a bad influence.

Edwin, I will remind you that you are

speaking to your future queen.

Apologies, Your Highness, but your

official prenuptial luncheon starts in less than three hours.

Thus, there is a team of stylists awaiting

for you in your quarters.

I assumed this wedding was more about politics

than presentation.

Might I remind Her Highness that presentation is politics?

[whimsical music]

The entire Alsinian province was clearly ceded to Androvia

in the Treaty of 1628.

That was a treaty that was never ratified.

Even within Androvia, that treaty was widely dismissed.

Oh, you're an expert on Androvian history now?

It's a moot point to even try and bring that up,

since the joint occupancy accord, agreed to in 1923,

set up a 99-year mutual tenancy, which would have superseded it.

That was most graciously proposed by my own grandfather,

so I think I would know about the accord of 1923.

Then you would also know about the underlying agreement

that upon the accord's expiration,

ownership would revert to Vostieri.

Nonsense!

There was never an underlying agreement.

That is pure fiction.

The only fiction going on here is

that we're supposed to believe that's your real hair.

Or is the real fiction your waistline?

How much Spandex are you strapped into?

Sir.

[whistles]

That's my girl.

Darling, that's not very ladylike.

Well, something had to be done, Mother.

With all due respect, what was supposed to be

a purely ceremonial luncheon has yet again devolved

into another failed summit.

Now, if you would allow me, I believe

I have a way through this.

Chloe, we're doing a conflict resolution workshop.

Awesome!

This seems entirely irregular.

Father, please.

These outdated treaties that the two of you been fighting over

have done neither of our countries any good at all,

have they?

Your Majesties have both been given

ample opportunity to find a solution,

and you haven't been able to.

So might I suggest that the crown princess is

given the opportunity to provide some much

needed fresh perspective.

Beatrix, dear, this is really not the appropriate time.

Papa, darling, this is what Bea does.

If you could all just let her speak,

I think you'll find we have a rather

gifted diplomat amongst us.

Thank you.

You've got this.

Can we get a whiteboard in here?

I think we can all agree we'd like to resolve this matter

and find a permanent solution, not kick it down the road

like your grandparents did.

Quite right.

Excuse me, dear.

Which word are we trying to come up with?

There's not a right or a wrong word.

It's just that you each have to use the letter

you have to make a word.

In this situation, what would a win look like to you?

Not ever having to deal with this problem

for the rest of my life.

OK, I'll put that down as a win.

OK, queens, let's do a trust fall.

I'd like you to stand in front like this.

P for palace.

And you're just going to fall back and trust that my mum is

going to catch you.

K for king.

Service.

Bird.

I'm slightly worried that our liveries might clash.

Edwin, please.

Fall.

[laughter]

Queens.

That was great.

I know you two went to boarding school together.

King Richmond, I don't want you to think about it.

I want you to just blurt out a word that comes to mind of when

you first met my father.

I suppose inspiring.

Did you say inspiring?

The first word that came to mind.

Why do you think that is?

I was 11 years old.

I was fairly sheltered, and suddenly I was shipped off

to a Swiss boarding school, which was supposed

to make a man out of me.

Admittedly, I was terrified.

But then I met Winston.

He was a year older.

He seemed to be the only boy there who could

truly understand my position.

He inspired me that I could make my way there.

OK.

Great word, inspiring.

Father, what word comes to mind of when

you first met King Richmond?

I suppose comrade.

It was awkward with the other boys.

Given my royal standing, I felt quite isolated.

So when Richmond arrived, I finally

felt like I had a comrade, someone I could confide in and

team up with, as it were.

We did make quite a team, didn't we, rather?

We did indeed.

Do you remember the water tower adventure?

Do I?

I commissioned a painting of that very water tower.

It hangs in my personal study.

So how did it go from that to this current animosity?

When I graduated, my father told me I had to put all that

behind me and be a true leader.

He drilled into me that the Androvians or basically anyone

on the other side of any border--

BOTH: Can't be trusted.

And do you think that mistrust has

been a win for either of you?

[light music]

Good evening, ladies and gentlemen.

I'm very pleased and, frankly, a little

surprised to announce that after a private meeting

this afternoon, King Richmond and King Winston

have come to an agreement which would establish a mutual shared

occupancy of the Alsinian province,

overseen by an independent council made up of appointees

from both countries.

Any questions?

[shouting]

With our signatures, we enact the new treaty.

We also announce a new free trade

agreement between our two countries, which

will benefit both economies.

And, as an added benefit, my son is not forced

into a marriage of convenience.

My daughter does not have to marry a man she barely knows.

And with that, I return this token of your affection.

And I accept this ring and release you from your engagement

to me.

Excellent.

Well, ah, thank you very much.

Thank you.

[classical music]

I suppose we both rather dodged a bullet there,

didn't we?

Yes.

Lucky for both of us, wasn't it?

You're relieved, I'm sure, to be able to go back

to your old life in Boston.

Well, you sort of blew my cover there,

so it's not exactly going to be the same.

But having a higher profile is already

benefiting the foundation, and all of this

has taught me a new meaning of public service.

A princess for the people.

Sounds like a great story to teach children.

But I truly hope the next time you give that to someone, it's

not out of political expediency but

because you're really in love.

We hope for the best.

Princess Beatrix Vostieri, it has been

our pleasure to have met you.

We feel it has been an honor.

[somber music]

[light music]

Fantastic news.

We got the grant, and it's for more than what we asked for.

This should fund us for the next five years.

Bea?

Yeah, good.

That's good.

If we got this news back in Boston,

we'd be jumping up and down right now.

You're right.

This is stupid.

Sorry, that's great news.

Except here I am just staring at my hand.

Is there something wrong with it?

OK, fine.

I didn't even like the ring anyway.

It was too big and gaudy and totally not my style.

And yet your hand sort of looks empty without it now.

BEATRIX: And that's stupid, right?

No, it's not stupid.

Especially because this isn't about the ring, is it?

I've only known him a couple of weeks.

What I'm feeling can't be real, right?

Honey, it doesn't matter if it's

a few weeks or months or years.

If it's real, it's real.

Did you tell him how you feel?

No.

He seemed relieved, so I acted relieved.

It's too late now.

Now he's gone.

- Let's go after him. - What?

How would we even--

I have an idea.

Meet you out front in five minutes.

Five minutes.

Hey! Oh, great.

I borrowed it from one of the staff.

Get GPS up on your phone.

If we can find a couple of shortcuts,

we can beat him to the border.

Let's do it.

Let's do it!

[upbeat music]

OK, you good? - Yeah.

All right.

Take the next left!

Got it.

Ew!

I swallowed a bug.

Ugh!

Go around.

OK.

Stop the car.

Stop the car!

Desmond, darling, are you feeling quite well?

No, Mother, I have to say that I'm not.

I should think you'd be over the moon.

We have peacefully resolved the issues, and going forward,

relations between the two countries

shall be better than ever.

Which is great news for everyone concerned,

Father, except for me.

I've dedicated my entire life to this country.

But there's something that I have to do

now that's just for myself.

Son, this is craziness.

At the very least, we can send Edward and security with you

for whatever you have to do.

No, Father.

This is something that I have to do on my own.

But trust me, I'm going to be all right.

This isn't like you.

Can't you see?

The boy is dealing with a broken heart.

Let him go.

Thank you, Mama.

[music playing]

Desmond, couldn't have thought of this before you got so

far from the border, could you?

[speaking french]

What's wrong?

We're out of gas.

Oh, no.

We've definitely missed them by now.

Hey, we don't know that.

You might still be able to catch him.

You should go.

- You'll be OK? - Yeah, yeah.

Go!

Go!

You go, girl!

[rock music]

What are you doing?

Where's your security detail?

I gave them the slip like you taught me.

Oh, god.

I need to invest in some sweats.

These are not the right shoes for this.

What are you doing here?

Those things I said last night--

Last night.

Look, I said that we dodged a bullet,

but the truth is, I don't particularly

want to dodge that bullet. - You don't?

No.

And perhaps this is crazy.

Like your father said, we hardly know each other.

But I've never felt this way before.

I'm completely in love with you.

I feel the same way.

I think I still have it.

What are you doing?

I'm asking this not because I'm the prince

and you're the princess and it's our duty,

but because I, Desmond, am truly in love with you, Beatrix.

Will you marry me?

I will marry you for exactly that reason.

[sweeping music]

[romantic music]

[giggling]

You know, you could change your shirt this season.

No way.

This is my favorite shirt.

And if I take this off, the Bruins will lose.

You know that, right?

Yeah.

Hey, what's this fancy-looking envelope?

Wait, are these airline tickets?

First class.

This a joke?

Hold on, let me see the card.

Wow, there's a note written in it.

"Dear Rooster and Alice, you did say you wanted couple friends."

What?

[gasps]

Shut up.

These are our friends from the bowling alley.

Are you freaking kidding me?

What have we done?

What kind of chaos have we unleashed?

It is a wedding between two royal families.

And Edwin's involved, so you can't

have expected an intimate affair, just the two of us.

Yes, but seating 500 guests.

How are we going to do that?

And do we really know who all these people are?

I mean, this one, for example--

Johnny Payne?

Ah, yes.

The heir to the Glasswick.

Dukedom.

He's the son of my Uncle Willie.

That's on my mother's side.

I see.

And his plus one is a Miss Prudence Thorpe.

But why are they seated at a table with the Americans?

Oh, that was quite the scandal.

You see, Willie went over to America,

had a secret wife and a hidden heir.

I see.

But shouldn't he be seated with his parents, William and

Dorothy?

Should be seated with his highness's cousin, Henry.

Yes, because Henry is going out with an American,

Princess Sweet Pea.

Princess Sweet Pea, the theme park princess?

You know she's not real, right?

Apparently she's real enough to be

eating lobster at our wedding.

Well, if all this goes south, I'll be over there drinking

beer with Rooster and Alice.

I've got a better idea.

Why don't we run out for some pizza?

[music playing]

(SINGING) And I'll see you

At midnight

[music playing]