Original subtitles

Home sweet home.

Nice.

Yeah.

We're lucky we didn't run into my fucking nosy neighbor.

Why?

He's just, like, so annoying.

He's like this little chihuahua dog, yapping. Won't shut up.

I hate neighbors like that.

Other than that, this place is pretty awesome.

I mean, I've been in worse.

Me too.

Like what?

Dingy, infested pay by the hour hotels?

No.

No, um, just apartments I lived at during college.

You know, I couldn't afford, like, real nice places.

You should see some of the crack houses I lived in during college.

It's part of the reason I got into real estate.

Come on in.

Thanks.

Why don't you grab a seat?

Make yourself at home.

Kick off your, uh, flip flops.

Wine?

Um.

Red?

Are you sure?

Why?

Well, because you had seven vodka cherry sours.

I figured you wanted something sweet.

I'm 23.

I'll drink anything.

Good answer.

So just to be up front, I'm not some idiot model,

or, like, most of the guys that hang out my job,

I was gonna ask you about that. [INAUDIBLE]

have a thing for hustlers?

Probably.

He's fucking gross.

They hang out there all day nursing a cup of coffee

until they get a call, and they don't even tip.

Typical.

Tell me about it.

But I need a flexible job so I can go on shoots and stuff.

To be honest, I really haven't been on a date

since I moved to LA like six months ago.

Of course not.

LA guys have appointments, not dates.

So I've noticed.

And I'm not the type who, you know,

who just hooks up with anyone I meet.

And I don't normally go back to a guy's place

after only two dates.

So what made me different?

I'm still trying to figure that out.

Cheers.

Oh, wow.

That's, uh.

Not sweet.

Yeah, red wine usually doesn't come

with a cherry and an umbrella.

So Sebastian, do you make it a habit to go out with people

you wait on?

No.

In fact, most of the people who come into the restaurant

disgust me.

So, back to the original question.

What makes me different?

Maybe because you have your shit together.

Or at least you look like you have your shit together.

And you're driven.

Well, I don't have my shit together.

I have my life together.

You see?

That's what I want.

I know I'm young, but I'm very mature for my age.

I can tell.

Out of all my friends from school,

I was the most grown up.

Have some more wine.

Maybe you should stick to fruity drinks.

Can I kiss you?

Can I kiss you?

Of course.

Squeeze my neck.

Good job.

Hey.

I have to go.

I have a big job today. I had an amazing time.

Fine.

I'll text you later.

Here we are.

Max, you picked a good one.

I knew you'd love it.

God, see?

I told you it'd pay off to have a friend in real estate.

The lighting in here is incredible.

It's definitely bright.

Oh my gosh, and the kitchen.

The kitchen is amazing.

Well, he's a great cook.

I know.

And Tim's a great eater.

You know it, babe.

Max, uh, how many square feet is the kitchen

and the breakfast nook?

Well, combined, it's 12 by 16.

It says right on the fact sheet.

It's perfect.

I thought I left it here. It must be in the bedroom.

I'll be right back, guys.

OK. Bedroom.

I love it.

Can we just say yes now?

Yeah.

You find it?

Yeah.

You were right.

12 by 16.

How big's the bedroom?

It's 15 by 22.

Pretty big.

Hey, is everything OK?

Yeah. We're just going over the room sizes.

Oh. OK.

Kitchen is 12 by 16, babe.

Bedroom's 15 by?

22.

Yeah.

Oh, good.

Let's check out the patio.

OK!

The view out there is amazing.

- You're amazing. - Aww.

So yeah, never shooting with that photographer again.

Beggars can't be choosers, sweetie.

I'm not a beggar.

Honey, that was your second photo gig in six months.

I love you, but you's a beggar.

Oh, your [INAUDIBLE] showed up this morning.

Mr. Jesse stick up his ass was a little disappointed when he

heard you were out on a shoot.

But he perked right up when I told him you'd be

naked when the photos came out.

Real nice, Gina.

That's just lovely.

I got your back, baby.

I know that face.

That's a booty call.

Shut up.

Ain't no gay boy smiling like that from a text

unless it's to bump a boo.

It's from Max.

Mm-hmm.

Last night must have been really good, cause you walking funny.

You're so embarrassing.

You don't want me to make fun of your walk, don't do nasties.

Shush.

What's he say?

He wants to see me tonight.

Let me guess.

You gonna cancel on me cause I have a vagina?

Love you, mean it.

Mm-hmm.

I'm gonna buy me one of them strap on fire hydrant

sized things so you don't cancel on me no more.

It's not just that, Miss [INAUDIBLE].

I'm gonna slap the honky out of you if you say you in love.

I don't know.

He's just different.

Ow!

Bitch!

What was that for?

Because you didn't say you wasn't in love.

So?

So the next time we talk, you're going to say you're in love.

I know it.

It's not true.

Mm-hmm.

You gay boys find a good dick and fall

in love after the first fuck.

Fucking fall, fucking fall, fucking fall.

You're so retarded.

- Mm-hmm. - Retarded.

Damn, boy, sticking with that woowoos getting into trouble.

They're forgetting about their friends.

Then you want to come back to me when the shit hit the fan?

Well, you're crazy.

You got me fucked up, because you're not gonna come back to me.

I ain't just gonna be nobody's hand me downs.

Excuse me.

Where are the bathrooms?

--They're located on the other side of the bar,

sweetie.

Thank you.

No problem, sweetie.

You have a delicious day.

Lousy son of a bitch.

[INAUDIBLE].

I'm gonna slap you again.

Right here.

Don't try me, [INAUDIBLE].

I like it rough.

Hey, Nat.

Hey, Max.

I know you're busy, but I--

That's all right. What's going on?

So I decided to get a gun.

It's about time.

Yes, I know.

I just-- I just need one.

Are you fucking serious?

Well, yeah.

AII my girlfriends have one.

Nat.

And I say this with the most sincere love.

You're kind of nuts.

And I don't think someone as passionate as you should be

toting a gun in your Gucci bag.

Um, yeah.

That's what shrink one said.

I think you should listen to him.

Um, no.

What did shrink two say?

Uh, yeah.

He just wanted to prescribe me new pills.

OK.

What did Tim say?

You know.

Listen, you've got to talk to Tim.

You know how much Tim hates guns.

Don't pout.

You're my friend.

You're supposed to be on my team.

Yes, I'm your friend, but I don't want to be

the other side of that phone call

which says you shot someone by accident

or because you cut him off on the highway.

Yeah, so do you think a 22 revolver or 38 revolver?

Nat.

And do you think it would make me look fat?

I gotta get going, Nat.

OK.

Bye, Nat.

A 38, then.

Bye.

Bye, Maxy.

Thanks.

She's so crazy.

Thanks.

Hey, your creepy neighbor's not going to be,

like, spying on us, is he?

He's probably in the bushes right now jacking off.

I don't even know him and he creeps me out.

Hey, um, sorry I was late.

We got slammed last hour at work.

No sweat.

I'm, like, so impressed by you.

Why's that?

You really know how to live.

I can't wait until I can actually do what I want to do.

You know?

It'll happen.

I know.

How about we just live for right now?

Right now.

Sounds perfect.

Cheers.

Oh, so much belter than the red wine.

Am I gonna have to wait here all night for you?

How's that, kid?

Kid?

How was that for a kid?

How was that for a kid?

Let's finish this inside.

Hey, Miss.

Excuse me.

Hey there, sweetie.

Hi.

Uh, I need a table for one, please.

Oh. I'm sorry, sugar. We're not open yet.

Oh. It says you open at 11:00.

Oh, I know it does.

But it's only 10:58, so that gives me two whole minutes

to enjoy some peace.

OK.

Oh, um--

Yes, Sebastian is working!

Just because this place [INAUDIBLE].

Hey.

I figured you could use a little pick me up.

Well, thank you.

Mm-hmm.

So how'd it go with the old--

Yes, I got the gun.

Awesome.

I know.

It's the cutest little gun. Perfect for me.

- Terrible decision. - Hey. Hey.

Take the sunglasses off.

Thank you.

Aww.

Ugh, you know, Tim just yelled and blah blah blah.

Yeah?

So as my friend, do you recommend the last condo?

Of course.

Really?

Yeah.

Really?

Yeah. [INAUDIBLE].

I don't know.

- You know, he just [INAUDIBLE]. - Huh.

Wouldn't have anything to do with his wife buying a firearm

without talking to him?

Oh, whatever.

He needs to grow up.

He comes home all the time without talking

to me first when he buys stuff.

He's been avoiding me.

Really?

Mm-hmm.

I don't know.

I think he has ADD or ADHD or PMS or something.

It's probably PMS.

Have you talked to him about it?

About what?

About avoiding you.

-Oh. -Let's go. Keep up. [INAUDIBLE].

Uh, yeah, no, we talked about it in therapy.

And?

Our time ran out.

- Did you talk to him afterwards? - Oh, no.

We do not talk about that without our therapist present.

You don't need a the-rapist to talk to your own husband.

Yes. Yes we do, OK?

He doesn't open up.

You don't think he might be having an affair?

Oh my God.

If I found out he was cheating on me,

I'd probably kill myself.

No, that's a bit harsh. I'd probably kill him.

No, I trust him.

Do you?

Yeah.

I know where he is at all times.

I check his phone.

God.

I trust him.

I trust him, and there's-- there's nothing to doubt here,

OK?

You know, we are-- we are happily married,

and I love him.

And because I love him, I trust him.

And because I love him, we are married,

and we trust each other, and we are married, for fuck's sake!

No more caffeine. [INAUDIBLE].

Sorry.

It's OK.

No.

I think it's just that I want to get out of this apartment.

I am so tired of renting.

Just make an offer.

I want to.

But Tim-- Tim's dragging his feet.

[INAUDIBLE]

You guys doing OK?

Yeah.

Why?

Just asking.

No big deal.

No.

Why-- why are you asking?

- It's nothing. Just a question. - Max, please.

Listen, stop being so paranoid. I'm asking you a question.

I'm not paranoid, OK?

Shrink number one said that if someone asks you if everything

is all right, they know or they feel

that something is not right.

What?

Oh God, I am sorry.

I'm here for you.

Yeah, yeah, no, I'm fine.

It's nothing.

It's nothing at all, OK?

Just-- He hasn't fucked me in two months.

Bingo.

Wow.

And shrink number two says that I have to do something

that I do not want to do.

What's that?

Put that away.

Listen. Nat.

- You'll have to make compromises. - No.

We all have to make them.

I can't. No.

Just think about it this way.

Would you rather he got it from somewhere else?

- No. I'd be crushed. - Exactly.

And I'd probably kill the son of a bitch.

I win.

[INAUDIBLE].

That's even worse than red wine.

You can't go wrong with Patron.

I don't drink tequila anymore.

It makes me do crazy things.

I look forward to that.

Here's where the hustlers hang out.

Right after we close the restaurant.

Who?

Those guys along the wall, they're hustlers.

- Interesting. - No. It's disgusting.

They'll fuck anything for money.

And then they come in the restaurant. They don't even tip.

Assholes!

Forget about them. Chill out.

[INAUDIBLE]

You're right.

What do you want to do?

Uh.

So, do you want to leave, stay?

What do you want to do?

Let's get out of here.

Not even drunk yet.

Hell, I can remedy that. [INAUDIBLE].

What-- put that away.

They're gonna see you.

Ask me if I give a shit.

- Do you give a shit? - No.

- I've never done this. - Fucking do it. Shut up.

All right.

Come on.

Get a room.

You got a fucking problem?

I was kidding!

I was just kidding, bro.

I'm actually kind of jealous.

My date checked into rehab today.

I had to find out from his little friend down there.

Hey.

That's LA for you.

Well, you guys are cool, right? Be safe.

Hey, wait.

You want some company?

You mean like a threesome?

All right, bro.

Wait right here.

Don't move.

What's going on?

I think we should, uh, [INAUDIBLE].

Hey, are you serious?

Yes.

But, um.

Yeah.

Uh, but--

We both want the same thing.

Hey.

What are you waiting around for? Let's go.

All right.

Oh.

Hey, what's the matter, kid?

The fuck do you mean, what's the matter?

- I can't believe we-- - Stop.

I didn't mean to. It was an accident. I was all coked up.

I never done coke before!

He was into it.

We all were.

But--

Tell me how amazing it felt to take the life of someone so hot.

It feels like you were god.

You were god.

You picked him.

You chose his time to die.

- What are you talking about? - Shh.

You loved it.

Max, you scared me.

｣ Sadly not to death.

Buenas dias.

English.

Good morning.

Max, who is that guy?

He is so cute.

Is he a model?

Where did you meet him? Online?

Because I heard the way to date these days is online,

but I think I'm a little too young for that,

and-- not that you're old!

I mean, you're older, but you're hot.

You're hot older.

You're older intimate.

You done?

Hey.

Have a great day, my handsome burrito.

Oy, I would eat you like a chimichanga.

Handsome daddy neighbor.

Woof.

I cannot pull off a woof.

Maybe meow.

Si, si, si, meow.

Can I get you anything else?

Oh, yeah. More coffee, please.

No problem.

- No problem. - Thanks.

Sebastian!

Frank said we're cut.

About fucking time [INAUDIBLE].

[INAUDIBLE] next time he's tugging on that [INAUDIBLE]

prick and rips that shit off.

Anything else?

No.

Thanks.

I'll be your cashier when you're ready.

OK.

Uh-huh.

It's OK, it's OK, [INAUDIBLE].

Why you looking so tired?

I don't know.

Honey, don't lie to me. You lie to your boyfriend.

New purse?

No.

I finally finished the bottle last night.

You only bought it two days ago.

Did I ask for your permission?

Commentary.

Did I?

No.

So shut your gash.

Got a tampie?

It's a breadstick.

Honey, [INAUDIBLE] be like drowning

that bread in marinara sauce.

Mmm.

Yum.

So what's with the luggage under your eyes?

I guess I'm just in love.

Honey.

Sweetie.

Are you retarded?

No.

I know you've got some brains up there.

I know you learned something in all them

fancy schools you went to, especially that one overseas.

You gots to be stupid if you think you in love already!

You done now, mommy?

You lucky I ain't your mama, because if I'd known you'd

be talking crazy like this, I'd have stuck

a wire hanger up my cooch and shut you up for good.

Nice, Gina. Real nice.

Oh, shut up, you dumbshit. You know I love you.

[INAUDIBLE].

Don't forget, we got karaoke tonight.

I'm there.

Uh-huh.

Your ass better be.

I already am.

Yep.

Ra-ta-ta-ta!

Jesus.

Hi, neighbor.

You scared the shit out of me.

Do I have to put a fucking bell on you?

You scared me earlier. Payback.

Oh, is this the new Details Magazine?

- Shit. - Super wow. He's hot.

But you're way hotter.

Maybe you could be on the cover one day, hmm?

No thanks.

No, but you're like an actor or a model.

No.

You could be.

But I'm not. I'm in real estate.

But my friend Sebastian is.

He is?

Ay dios mio, so aren't you guys like dating?

Son novios?

Squishy squishy, huh?

Am I going to be seeing a lot more of him?

I certainly hope so.

Not that I would ever try to steal him away.

I would never do that.

But-- you-- you left your magazine.

I hope he doesn't fall in love with me.

I washed my twat for this?

What a waste.

I know.

If I wanted to see the same old hustlers.

I would have stayed back at the restaurant.

What's up, Bobby?

Want a drink?

I got one, thanks.

Then what about for me?

Excuse me, did we give you any indication

that we wanted to talk to you?

Chill out.

No.

I don't think so.

Why don't you take your nasty, overused ass

back to your side of the bar?

Thank you.

Motherfuckers give me the pussy farts.

The what?

Pussy farts.

[INAUDIBLE].

What is that smell?

Pussy fart.

Oh, it's horrible!

I told you.

Max?

Max is here. [INAUDIBLE].

Your what?

Shush.

Excuse me, what did you call him?

Hey.

Excuse me, your what?

Natalie wanted a drink, so I thought

I'd introduce her to Sebastian.

Hi.

Nice to meet you.

Hi.

Oh, uh, this is Gina.

Hi.

Charmed.

Nice to meet you, Gina.

Mm-hmm. I heard you got a big one.

[INAUDIBLE].

So, uh, boyfriend.

Huh?

Sorry.

This is--

Oh. Lord and black baby Jesus, it is time for me to go.

Already?

Yes.

I'm about to throw up.

Don't give me that face.

With teeth like that, I know you throw up after eating.

What?

So, it's time to go?

What?

Right?

No it ain't.

So, hey, legs, you a lipstick lesby or what?

Um, no.

I'm married.

She's married.

Yeah.

Um, what about you?

You know, what is your gender reassignment surgery?

I ain't no transformer!

Oh, I'm sorry, bull dyke.

I don't like fish.

My kitty cat eats 100% beef.

It's what's for dinner.

Oh my God.

Listen. Listen up.

Hey. You're an amazing woman.

It's great to meet you.

Have a great night. Drive fast. Take chances.

Uh, yeah.

I'll see you [INAUDIBLE].

Give me a kiss before your mouth smells like cock.

Oh God.

Let's go.

I'm gonna walk around.

And take it easy on his ass.

Highly unlikely.

I'll be right back.

Get out of my way, boy.

So, where'd you meet this one?

Uh, he's just a waiter at the new spot.

Was he on the menu?

Chicken [INAUDIBLE]?

That's cute.

We're just having fun.

Does he know that?

He's obviously falling head over dick for you.

What do you know about this guy?

What, hey, at least if he turns into another stalker,

I've got a gun.

- Really? - I mean, seriously.

Did you see how young he is?

- What do you know about him? - Nat.

He's your boyfriend?

- Nat. - Come on.

Oh, OK,

One last thing and then I shut up.

Good.

I don't trust him.

That's it.

I don't trust him.

Done?

Mm-hmm.

Good.

But he is cute.

Oh yeah.

Jesus.

Hey.

Uh, sorry about that.

She has diarrhea of the mouth.

That's OK.

We noticed.

I was a little girl once too.

Oh, shit.

I'm so sorry.

Here, let me get that.

My fault.

It's OK.

The drink cost more than the shirt.

What's your name?

-Uh, Jerry. -Here.

Take it to Chang's.

Tell them Natalie sent you.

He's a genius.

Your shirt will look [INAUDIBLE].

You know what?

Um, honey, I'm gonna head home.

No, no, you didn't get your drink yet.

Yeah, I know. I have strip aerobics in the morning.

Nice meeting you.

Leaving so soon?

Yeah, you know, I gotta get back and get

tonight's sex by my husband.

Well, it was good meeting you.

No, no, no, stay, stay.

It's fine.

I got a gun.

We're good.

Yeah, we're good.

OK, bye.

All right.

Don't text and drive.

I got a gun?

[INAUDIBLE].

Tonight's sex.

She's funny.

Hey.

We had this exquisite idea.

You, me, and him.

We go back to our place.

Um.

What?

What are you talking about?

Just go with it.

We could have a threesome.

Like in the movies.

Seriously?

Yeah, you know what?

Tonight's actually not a good night.

What do you think?

Let me just go to the bathroom, take a piss.

I'll be right back.

All right. Quick, though.

We might change our mind. I'll time you.

We'll probably change our mind, actually.

Uno, dos, tres.

What, am I not, like, good enough for you?

Oh my God, chill out, kid.

Wow.

You know, I hate when you call me kid.

[INAUDIBLE]

[INAUDIBLE].

Maybe, um--

[INAUDIBLE].

Just do it one more time.

[INAUDIBLE].

Got us a little party favor, if you guys want to partake.

[INAUDIBLE].

All right.

You came over to party. [INAUDIBLE]. Come on, what you got?

Yeah, there you go.

There you go.

[INAUDIBLE]

[INAUDIBLE]

It makes you strong.

Show me how strong you are.

Go, go, go, go.

I need more!

You need more.

Yeah, come on!

Come on!

Do another one, do another one!

Come on, you came to fucking party, man. Let's go.

Get that fucking dick hard.

You wanna fuck all night? Come on.

Get that fucking cocaine out.

Come on. [INAUDIBLE].

- Come on. -Come on, slow down.

- This is some strong shit. - Don't be a pussy now.

Let's get back to partying.

Come on, come on, let's roll.

Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on.

Snort that fucking coke!

Come on, come on, come on, come on, yeah.

Wanna party with us? Come on.

Come on. [INAUDIBLE]. Come on, my love.

Snort that up. Let's go!

Snort! Come on!

Yeah!

Come on, come on.

Yeah, yeah, fuck yeah!

Fuck yeah!

[INAUDIBLE].

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah!

Fuck yeah.

Feel that drip.

Feel that dripping.

Oh yeah.

Yeah, yeah, [INAUDIBLE].

Come on!

How's that feel?

I love you.

Ow.

What?

That belt cut me.

Sorry.

It's OK.

You know, um. I've been thinking about, well, stuff.

Yeah?

Uh, those guys that we've-- you know.

Listen, listen.

We don't have to talk about this.

Tonight was about us.

I agree that we're like, into the same stuff.

And I think it's so hot that we're exploring this together.

But--

Listen, Sebastian.

We don't need to talk about that ever.

And we don't have to do it again.

OK?

Well, that's just it.

I like it.

Let's get some sleep.

Ola.

You forgot this the other day.

- My gift to you. Keep it. - Ay!

Too many extracurricular activities?

I'm jelly.

That means jealous.

I'm trying to start my own blog, and it's all about people being jelly.

Cute, right? Cute?

Not at all.

I was hoping to talk to your friend. Is he coming by?

I want to be a model.

I'm cute.

I can do what he do.

Sashay.

[INAUDIBLE]

I just have to ask him a few questions.

He's a really busy guy, but I'll let him know you're interested.

Ay, thank you so much.

Ew, you're so sweaty.

Oh, wait, there was someone--

You might want to climb out the window.

Virgins on the prowl.

What are you all smiles about?

Problem solved.

What problem?

We can still have our fun, guilt free.

What fun?

Living.

Living?

What--

Never felt so alive as I did when I killed those guys.

Sebastian.

No. It's the power that makes me feel alive.

You gotta take it down a couple notches.

No. Listen.

Hustlers.

- What about hustlers? - We could kill hustlers.

No one's going to know that they're gone.

No one cares.

Well, maybe their regular clients.

Think about it.

Whores aren't worth anything to society or to themselves.

Plus, they don't tip.

Wait.

Are you being serious?

Insert cliche here.

Dead serious.

Remember him?

We've seen him at a couple bars.

All of his friends are on here too.

And I won't have any trouble killing those motherfuckers.

Listen to yourself.

- What? - Sounds like you just want to kill them

because they're hustlers and they don't tip.

Why are you acting like--

I just want to make sure you're doing this for the right reasons.

I want to do it because I enjoy the power I have over people.

Killing them makes me feel alive.

You can call him.

Yeah?

Go ahead.

Rodrigo, get [INAUDIBLE] out of your ass-o!

Should've had that wetback deported a long time ago,

but he's the only straight guy that works here.

And for such a short guy, he has a huge penis.

Low balls, but a huge penis.

Plus, he eats a mean pussy.

Why the fuck are we so busy?

It's that new vampire movie playing next door.

[INAUDIBLE]?

Vampire for retards.

Yeah, but the lead guy's pretty hot, though.

Yeah, if you like your guys pale and dead.

Which I do.

Why are you two just standing around? [INAUDIBLE].

Your damn cook line keeps taking

a bunch of doobie breaks!

Get that goddamn food out there now!

What fucking food?

You see any food in front of us, you dumb shit?

Watch yourself, Gina.

Mm-hmm.

That's right.

Walk that lazy ass up out of here,

because you know you're wrong.

Jesus.

Gina.

What you doing tonight?

Supposed to meet Max.

It's 11:00 already?

[INAUDIBLE].

Please.

Hey, Sebastian.

I just [INAUDIBLE]. Asked for you specifically.

Hope you didn't have any plans.

Three guesses who that's gonna be.

Mm-hmm.

Jesse?

Want me to pour hot coffee on him? You know I'd do it.

Friends got to stick together.

Hey, Jesse.

How are you doing?

Great.

Busy, working long hours, but good.

How are you?

Good.

Um, the usual, or something new?

Ouch.

That must have hurt.

Excuse me?

You've got a scratch on your neck.

Uh, crazy cat.

So, uh, what can I get you, Jess?

Hey, my cousin went to school overseas, too.

What?

Yeah.

Carmina Belado.

Beautiful school.

South Florence.

Actually spent a summer there. I loved it.

How do you know, um, I went to school?

Your ring?

Right.

Yeah.

It's a great school.

What year did you graduate?

Oh, um, 2006.

Jeez, just a baby.

Hardly.

Um, what can I get you, Jess?

Actually, I'm just-- Can I take a minute?

I need to think about it.

Take your time.

Hello?

Hey.

You up?

Uh, no.

I just got slammed at work.

I have no idea when I'm gonna get out of here.

Man, that sucks.

We might have to reschedule the, uh, plan for tonight.

Shit.

OK.

I'll cancel it.

You get some rest, all right?

I'll try.

All right, bye.

You're, uh, Max, right?

Yes sir, cowboy.

Did you want to hang out here, or did you have a place?

Oh, I just live around the block.

Cool.

Watch your step.

Oh, buckle up.

Safety first.

Stop!

What-- what are you-- what?

Stop!

Stop!

Stop!

Stop!

How's your [INAUDIBLE]?

Alex is the maitre d'.

Please.

What about you?

Uh, you still going to [INAUDIBLE] tonight?

Probably asleep.

Oh, right on, bitch. Let's go out and get a drink.

Not tonight.

I'm tired.

Please?

Gina, I'm exhausted.

Whatever.

What?

Nothing.

Go play house.

Gina.

Hey, don't be like that!

Oh, um.

Sorry.

Excuse me.

It's OK.

Have a good night.

I'm only dressed like this because they pay me.

Excuse me?

I'm an actor.

The theater pays me to show up like this.

They even have a name.

Viggo.

I know.

I mean.

Whatever pays the bills, right?

I hear that.

Um, so, what are you gonna do tonight?

Looking for some fun, actually.

So where are you headed?

Obviously you didn't see the movie.

No. I just out of work.

Um, my boyfriend's waiting up for me, so.

Oh.

You have a boyfriend.

Um, yeah.

That's cool.

All right, I'll see you later.

Nice to meet you.

Stupid fucking [INAUDIBLE].

Hey, good morning.

Good morning.

How was work?

Fine.

But I'm still pissed that, you know,

we had to cancel that guy last night.

Hey, some other time.

I'm sure he's not thinking about us anyway.

But he was perfect.

Can we call him over again today?

Hey, relax.

I haven't even had my first cup of coffee yet.

I'm just so turned on.

I just can't wait for us to, you know, share.

- And again, and again, and-- - OK.

OK. Get him over here.

Wasn't his name Colton?

Yeah, I think so.

I can't find him on here.

Well, just pick another one. I'm gonna go get dressed.

Happy hustler hunt.

Dude, I found one.

Max, I found one.

I found one.

I found a good one.

You were the guy that didn't see that vampire movie.

- Um, what? - This is kind of embarrassing.

I'm the vampire guy you bumped into.

- Viggo, right? - Yeah.

You can call me Andy.

Well, what a pleasant surprise.

Yeah?

My boyfriend will like you.

I've never done a three way before.

Well, must be fate.

Shh.

Help!

Let's fuck like vampires.

I fucking love you.

Who the hell is that?

[INAUDIBLE], let me in!

Put him behind the table.

Tell him you're busy.

No, he'll just sit there and wait until we leave.

I'll handle it.

Come on.

Push him up, push him up.

I'll handle it.

It's not a bad time.

It's always a bad time with you.

Ay! You're so funny.

Now is not a good time.

I just want to ask your friend, like,

a couple of modeling questions.

Oh, hi, I'm Rashard.

OK.

Time to go.

No, I just want to ask, like, four questions.

OK, like five.

OK, more like 10. I'm just gonna come in for like a couple of seconds.

Leave me the fuck alone!

Fuck.

That was so close.

Get online.

Call [INAUDIBLE]. [INAUDIBLE] worked up again.

Let's go.

Let's-- listen.

We'll just put this guy in the bedroom.

We'll take care of the new one out here.

- Come on. - OK.

What's up?

Nice shirt.

Nice do rag.

You Max?

Come on in.

All right, just like my ad said, $200 an hour,

cash, no kissing, no barebacking,

and I don't get fucked.

That's OK.

We're not that gay.

You didn't say anything about there being two of you guys.

Price just went up.

$225.

Let's just make it an even $1000.

Fuck yeah.

So, what?

We're just going to do this shit right here?

So who's gonna suck my dick first?

You like that?

Look at that.

Look at that [INAUDIBLE].

Something's wrong.

It's not-- it's not working.

Keep going.

You're doing great.

Nice work, kid.

OK, man, this is starting to get ridiculous.

Sebastian's at work.

He's not here.

He's not coming home until really, really late. OK?

[INAUDIBLE].

No.

He's at his day job.

Huh.

Day job.

It's a tough business. He has to work a real job, too.

Real job.

And why aren't you working? It's Monday.

Not that it's any of your business,

but I work for myself.

Why aren't you working?

Ever?

I am a trust fund baby.

My grandpapa is Diego Tabasco, but you may

better know him by his sauce.

Wow.

Ah, si. Is super wow, huh?

Anyways, Sebastian's not here.

When will he be free to talk?

I don't know.

Wait a minute.

I know what you guys are up to.

I know your little secret.

What secret?

There's no day job.

He's famous, isn't he? [INAUDIBLE] tell me.

- Goodbye. - Ay!

Ay, you're so playful!

Brock?

Of course.

Ah.

Come on in.

Do you know what I find offensive in not just you,

but people in general?

Arrogance.

Arrogance makes people ugly.

You're arrogant because you have this beautiful body,

and you use this body to get by.

To get everything you want in life.

And you rely too much on this handsome face

to get by in life.

Arrogance is an evil thing.

Hello, it's Max.

I'm kind of in the middle of something.

Yeah, I can be right there.

All right.

See you guys then.

Nat, Tim, where are you guys?

Hey!

Hey, what's up?

[INAUDIBLE].

Hey, no problem, buddy.

Where's Natalie?

- Couldn't make it. - Oh.

I just needed to check one thing before we put our bid in.

It's not a problem. What do you need?

Well.

Come on. I mean, Tim, I got a busy night planned.

Let's wrap this up.

What are you doing?

You're not stupid.

Tim, you have a wife.

She doesn't suck dick.

So, I turn you on?

You want me to suck your dick?

Come on, man.

Just suck it.

Natalie will not find out about this.

She deserves better than you.

Natalie?

You don't have to worry about killing Tim

for cheating on you.

Thanks.

I almost took 20% off this time.

Why?

Because you've been a mess.

You're showing up late, breaking shit left and right.

You're forgetting orders, customers getting pissed.

Look, I'm-- I'm sorry. I--

This is a business.

This is my business.

Keep your personal shit out of the job.

Keep the customers happy, or you're out of here.

Capiche?

Hey, you can't threaten him.

This ain't no threat, Gina.

Oh, OK, well this is.

You threaten him and I'm going to my lawyer about last year's

Christmas party.

Yeah, you remember.

You came and whispered in my ear with vodka stank breath

that you wanted to, uh, put your dickie in my booty hole

because you like to fuck in the stink.

Yeah. I believe we call that, uh,

sexual harassment here in California.

Shut it, Gina.

Wait, where you going?

I gots more.

You never told me that.

He didn't.

He was so fucked up that night he'd

believe anything I told him.

Thanks. Thanks.

Don't thank me. Stop dissing me.

I'm not dissing you.

This kitty don't beg.

Look, just don't become one of those assholes

that meets someone and forgets his friends.

Because when the shit goes south, and it will, it'll be me

you come running to.

And my happy ass just may not be here.

Gina, wait.

You're right. You're right.

I know.

So how about tonight?

After work, we'll go out and get some drinks, just you and me.

Mm, I have to check my calendar.

Mm-hmm, you lucky Animal Hoarders ain't showing tonight.

I'll pretend you didn't say that.

I'm on a higher level.

What do you mean you're on a higher level with him?

I don't know. It's just--

Are you on meth?

No.

Look, honey, I know people act different and all that shit,

but you've been a loopy space cadet.

I don't think you're being straight up with me.

I think he brings out the person I really am.

Is this Patrick?

Yeah, I saw your ad.

You free?

Well, fuck you.

Is this Victor?

I saw your ad.

Are you free?

Right now.

No, right now.

$200 extra?

Not a problem.

Are you happy with him?

I think I am.

That's all that matters, then.

Oh good lord, don't look. Your stalker just walked in.

You know, I think he really is stalking me.

Girl, he creeps me out.

He comes to the restaurant, and if you ain't working, he leaves.

Stop, he does!

It's scary.

I'm la-- I'm nervously laughing, because that's creepy.

It's a little chilly in here.

You got a sweater?

Uh, that's-- that's too scratchy.

You got like cashmere or vicuna?

Ah, much better.

So, do you have, like, something to drink?

A Long Island iced tea would be so good.

Oh, but don't use gin or rum.

Well then it won't be a Long Island iced tea.

Just make it work.

Mm, can I have less ice, please?

It's OK.

It's a little warm in here now.

Do you think you could adjust the AC?

Oh, how about some, uh-- some snacks?

Pate with, uh, cracked pepper crackers, or--

Hi.

He's not here. I told you, he's working late tonight.

Where are they?

What are you talking about?

Two hot guys have come in here and haven't left.

And I saw you leave and come back, and they never did.

Are you having a three way?

Ay, did you go and leave and come

back with like, more party lubes and condoms and party favors?

[INAUDIBLE] tell me everything. I just want to know.

You're crazy.

I'm busy.

Ah, si, busy fucking!

Richard?

Hmm?

I'm gonna ask you this one more time.

Hmm?

Please leave me and my friend alone.

Well, maybe I should just ask him then, hmm?

Richard!

Come on, I won't hurt you.

No!

It's not what you think.

You choked me and then threw a knife in my back!

What the fuck do you think I'm thinking?

Just calm down.

[INAUDIBLE].

Why would you try to hurt me?

Because you piss me the fuck off!

Ay!

No, it's true.

And it was so small, I had to jack it off

with my press on fingernails.

What?

Did you just say press on fingernails?

Yes.

I took them off and was just rubbing it.

Oh my God.

TMI.

Shit, it's late.

I need to go.

No, come on.

One more.

I can't. I can't.

- I gotta wake up early. - Early?

Mm.

You know you're gonna be getting

it on until the sun comes up.

Not tonight, dear.

It's, uh, off limits.

Under maintenance.

Mm-hmm.

You need a ride?

No, uh, my apartment's right down the block.

I haven't been home in a few days, you know?

OK. You're dismissed.

What about you? Are you leaving?

No.

I don't have to work tomorrow, so I might

get drunk and find me a man.

OK, woman.

Just be safe.

Always.

Wear a condom.

Never.

Mwah.

Love you.

Bye.

Asshole.

What the hell is this?

I was having some fun.

But that fucking beaner wouldn't shut up, and then he came in--

- Some fun? - Yeah, yeah, yeah, and then he--

How can you do this to me?

What?

Calm down.

I fucking love you.

I love you.

You don't love me.

You love what I've given you.

What I made you.

How can you betray me like this?

I even called whores for us.

I did it for us.

So we could do it forever.

Do you know how many guys I could have had fun with?

But I wanted us to do it together.

To share it only with each other.

But you betrayed me.

Just like everyone else in my life.

My soulmate, my one.

I thought I found someone, but it's the same fucking

thing all over again!

You're a fucking pathetic kid.

Don't move.

Jesse, what the hell are you doing here?

Detective Jesse War, Metro Police.

What?

Put your fucking hands up!

Don't make another move, Sebastian.

Backup's on the way.

I've been following Max Tambor for weeks now,

gathering evidence.

Wait a second.

You shut your fucking mouth.

Very smart.

Very smart about who he chose to kill.

You were the only guy who came into his life who didn't end up missing,

and that's when I suspected he must not be working alone.

Listen to me, it was all his idea.

He did it.

It was all his idea.

Shut up!

I never killed anyone.

- Jesus, Sebastian. - He did it!

Sebastian.

Oh, what about that guy in the motel on Sunset?

Who?

Does multiple stab wounds ring a bell, fucker?

Then I did some more investigating.

You have quite a history, Sebastian.

Your freshman year, five guys from your college

were brutally murdered.

Then, after your second transfer to a new campus,

three more guys found dead.

Stabbing, strangulation, drowning.

All unsolved cases.

I don't know what you're talking about.

How many have you killed?

No one, I swear.

Don't lie to me, Sebastian.

Just-- look, it was just the guy in the hotel room.

It was an accident.

You don't accidentally rent in a hotel room, pay with cash,

and then leave some kid tweaked out

on the floor dying so you can go grab a beer with your friends!

Stop!

And what about that kid?

At your boarding school in Italy?

Carmino Balado?

He was my cousin.

We've been in touch with the Italian authorities. Sebastian.

Listen to me very carefully and very closely.

- You need to let me explain. - Don't make another move.

Sebastian Youngstrom, you're under arrest

for the murders of-- hey!

Gina, what are you doing?

He was following you, so I-- I followed him!

Are you OK?

Help.

Help me, please.

Gina!

What did you do, you son of a bitch?

Max!

Shh. Calm down!

You know what? I never trusted you.

Natalie!

Did you-- did you kill my husband, too?

Is that why Max left me that message?

I killed your husband?

Oh, you fucking--

I never--

Trusted--

You!

God!

Oh, God!

911.

What is your emergency?

I'm at 1622 North Beverly.

Ma'am, did you say 1622 North Beverly?

My friend is dead.

They killed him, please, oh my God,

Ma'am, officers have been dispatched

and are en route.

They killed my husband, too!

Ma'am, are you in a safe place?

Ma'am, is the intruder still in the house?

No, they're all dead.

They're all dead.

Ma'am, I'm going

to stay on the phone with you.

No, they're all dead!

Ma'am, what's your name?