Original subtitles

[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]

[PORKY HUMMING]

It's a simple question...

Do you want red or white towels in the massage parlor?

Um, um... You like the red ones?

[BELL DINGS]

GABBY: What's a goat got to do to get some service over here?

Well, that sounds like my friend, Gabby Goat.

-[DINGS] -Hello? Anybody home?

-Hello, Gabby. -It's about time.

[SHOUTING] I've been here for five minutes ringing the bell,

and if I don't get... Oh, hey Porky.

Welcome to Porky's Day Spa.

-How can I help you? -Porky, I'm a nervous wreck.

My back aches, my head hurts.

I just need to relax and get some

peace and quiet!

And it was either this or Vegas, and this was cheaper.

You haven't changed a bit, Gabby.

Well, step this way,

and we'll accomo... [STAMMERING] We'll rest your weary head.

[MUTTERS] All right, all right.

Gabby for as long as I've known you, you've always been high, strong and tensed.

So, let's start off with giving you a nice relaxing massage.

Yeah, well this better be good.

Hey, Porky! You doing anything back there? I don't feel nothing!

[CRACKS]

You have a lot more tension than I thought.

Well, do something about it! I'm all tied up in knots!

How about we try a hot rock massage?

[SCREAMS]

-[SIZZLING] -Hey! What are you doing back there?

I'm eliminating the toxins from your body.

It seems like you're just eliminating the skin from my back!

[GRUNTS] How about trying something that's actually relaxing?

-[GRUNTING] -How about this? Oops!

[GROANS] Get your bacon off of my face!

Gosh, this is serious.

[STAMMERS] Just try a little bit of massage oil.

Hey. Well, that does feel a little--

[GRUNTS]

Now Gabby, you need to stay on the table.

[GABY GRUNTING]

This massage oil should say, "Slippery when wet."

[GROANS] I don't know about this.

The last thing was too, uh, physical.

That's okay pal. We'll try something that just requires sitting.

With a mere meditation.

Now, after I hit the gong of silence,

-we're going to be quiet, okay? -Got it.

And now no talking and focus on your breathing.

-[GONG RINGS] -[GRUMBLING]

[BREATHS IN AND OUT SHARPLY]

[BREATHS IN AND OUT SHARPLY]

[BREATHING IN AND OUT SHARPLY]

[BREATHING IN AND SHARPLY]

I'm focusing on your breathing and it's driving me crazy!

-For the last time, Gabby... -[GONG RINGS]

I'll gong you, you no good, frizen-frazen.

-[GROANS] -[BUZZING]

[GRUMBLING]

Oh.

-[GRUNTING] -[BUZZING]

-I got ya! -[GONG RINGS]

-[BUZZING] -Darn it, I missed. Get back here!

Hmm. This isn't working.

But I know I can relax anyone.

I don't know, Porky, maybe I should get going.

I'm determined to make a new goat out of you.

If there's one thing that's guaranteed to work,

it's the peaceful tranquility of my beautiful serenity garden.

Every flower has its own calming energy.

All you have to do is relax and breathe it in.

[INHALES]

[EXHALES] Ah...

Go ahead and give it a try.

All right. But don't blame me if my allergies starts to act up.

[SNORTS]

[EXCLAIMS AND COUGHS]

[SNIFFING]

[GROANING]

[SNIFFING]

[SNEEZES]

Gabby! My precious mari...

[STAMMERING] My mari... My flowers!

How could you harm such an innocent and serene object of nature?

-That object of nature gave me a snot attack. -[GROANS]

Gabby, you shouldn't harm the serenity of a flower.

Well, I'll tell you something about your flowers, buddy.

They're something to sneeze at!

Oh, yeah? [STAMMERING] Well, let's try my facial mask.

Wow, you look bushed! [GRUNTS]

Time to cool off!

[GROANS]

[EXCLAIMS]

[SCREAMS]

[GRUNTS]

-[GRUNTING] -[LAUGHS]

[SCREAMS]

[GRUNTS]

[GRUNTS]

-[SCREAMS] -[LAUGHS]

Ah, you know what?

Letting out all that aggression really did something for me.

I feel like a new goat! And I have you to thank, pal.

Well, guess what, Gabby?

Now, I'm all tense and stressed,

and since you destroyed my spa,

I don't have anything to take my stress out on!

[STAMMERING] Do I?

[SCREAMS]

I should've went to Vegas.

Come on. We're almost there.

We have to keep going until we find that rare blue orchid

of Quernicava.

Sir, I can't go any further.

Don't say that. You're an explorer.

You can do anything you put your mind to.

No, I can't go any further because I'm caught in all these vines.

Ah, the old tangle-up-my-sidekick trick.

Well played, jungle. Well played!

Ha!

Um, who are you talking to?

I am talking to the jungle, my friend.

It's angry. It's angry that I'm trying to get fame and fortune

by exposing its secrets.

[STAMMERING] I have a secret. I take Bear-Bear with me everywhere.

And whenever I get scared, I hold it

and pet it and press it against my face

to soothe myself.

[INHALES] Ah, Bear-Bear.

[SIGHING HAPPILY, STAMMERING] Bear-Bear.

Well, your [STAMMERING] Bear-Bear won't help you where we're going.

-Where are we going? -We are going there!

[THUNDER CRACKLING]

-Get out of here, monkeys! -[SHRIEKING]

We're going in there?

Well, that's where we find the rare blue orchid of Quernicava.

-After you! -[SCREAMS]

Woo-hoo!

[PORKY SHOUTING]

[ELECTRICITY FIZZLES]

DAFFY: Hey! What's going on? It's all dark.

PORKY: Maybe you should turn on your head lamp.

DAFFY: Great idea! Glad I thought of it.

Well, at least we're not falling.

How are we gonna get down?

As long as these headlights are on, I'll figure it out.

[ELECTRICITY FIZZLES]

PORKY: Did you bring extra batteries?

DAFFY: Nope. But I have a solution.

[PORKY GRUNTS]

There! Your head lamp just need a little tap.

-DAFFY: Hmm. Perhaps it needs another whack. -[PORKY GROANS]

There we go. Gosh! These things are finicky.

Maybe I need to use something harder.

-Hey, I know... That should do it. -[PORKY GRUNTS]

Oh, okay. That's enough.

[STAMMERING] Let's just worry about how to get down.

-Oh, that's easy. -[SCREAMS]

Well, I'm glad I didn't bring extra batteries

'cause these head lamps are broken.

You okay, pal?

[STAMMERING] Thank goodness these pointy sharp rocks broke my fall.

Oh, stop your whining.

We gotta track down this orchid.

But Daffy, we're trapped at the bottom of this cave

with no food, no water and no other stuff!

You know, you're right.

Hold this. I better order us some food.

-You like empanadas? -[RATTLING]

[SCREAMS]

Empanadas are great. You're gonna love them.

Then again. I don't think he's met a food he doesn't love.

Hello, Chapi Mercado's Empanadas?

I need four empanadas for delivery.

-Ow! -Better make it six.

I want a, let's see...

How about a mushroom, a green pepper and two broccolis.

-What do you want? -Snake!

-One snake. -Snake! Give me a stick!

-One stick empanada. -[SCREAMS]

And a side of [SCREAMS].

[STRUGGLING]

Keep it down! I'm excited too.

My address? Yeah, I'm at the corner of kingdom, South America.

And hurry. I've got a hungry piggy over here, so make it snappy, Chapi!

Hello? Hello!

Oh, great. My phone died.

And there's never a wall outlet when you need one.

You know what I'm talking about, buddy?

Porky? Hey bud, where did you go?

Oh, there you are...

Stop wandering off. I just found the flash light.

-Follow me! -[GROWLS]

What do I have to do? Take you by the hand?

Say, when did you get these claws?

And this rough, scaly skin?

And big sharp teeth?

You're not Porky! You're a Quernicava cave monster!

[GROWLS]

You know, there's only one thing worse than being in the dark,

and that's seeing what's in the dark!

-[GROWLS] -[ELECTRICITY FIZZLES]

[DAFFY GIGGLING]

Mr. Duck, I found you.

[GASPS] And I wish I hadn't!

-[GROWLS] -[BOTH SCREAMING]

[GROWLS]

DAFFY: I think we lost him.

-Boo! -[BOTH SCREAMING]

DAFFY: Enough messing around.

We've got to find that blue orchid!

PORKY: Isn't that it over there?

Yes, I did it!

I found the rare blue orchid of Quernicava!

And the world thought it couldn't be done.

It laughed at me for all these years.

Well, who's laughing now?

[STRUGGLES] Who's laughing now?

Who's [GRUNTS] laughing [GRUNTS] now?

Why won't this thing come loose?

Um, Mr. Duck?

-[BOTH SCREAMING] -[GROWLS]

DAFFY: Run! Jump! Climb!

Duck! Leap! Hop!

[DAFFY AND PORKY SCREAMING]

[EXCLAIMS, STAMMERING] I hold my Bear-Bear, I pet my Bear-Bear,

I rub it against my face.

Gimme! I hold my Bear-Bear, I pet my Bear-Bear,

I rub it against my face.

[GROWLS]

[SPEAKING GIBBERISH]

[REPLYING IN GIBBERISH]

[CRIES]

[STAMMERS] Stop!

[EXCLAIMS]

[PURRING]

I guess when it's dark, everyone needs a Bear-Bear.

Bear-Bear! [CRIES]

[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]