Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,913 --> 00:00:02,480
[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
2
00:00:21,499 --> 00:00:25,416
Okay, okay, just a few
more jokes before
I best be heading out.
3
00:00:25,503 --> 00:00:27,810
"Beheading"?
I'm not talking to you, pal.
4
00:00:27,897 --> 00:00:30,204
This guy takes his job
super seriously.
5
00:00:30,291 --> 00:00:32,728
You mess with him,
heads will roll.
6
00:00:32,815 --> 00:00:35,557
-[YELPS]
-Delight, ye folk,
one and all!
7
00:00:35,644 --> 00:00:40,823
It is I, Sir Littlechin,
triumphantly returning
from another epic contest,
8
00:00:40,910 --> 00:00:44,870
-after 12 fortnights.
-"Fortnights"?
English, please!
9
00:00:44,957 --> 00:00:47,090
[CROWD LAUGHS]
10
00:00:47,177 --> 00:00:49,005
Ooh, a fortnight
is two weeks.
11
00:00:49,092 --> 00:00:51,138
"Two weeks"!
My goodness.
12
00:00:51,225 --> 00:00:53,749
What's twelve times four,
plus the square root
of Pi, that's...
13
00:00:53,836 --> 00:00:56,621
That's almost six months!
Took you long enough.
14
00:00:56,708 --> 00:00:59,320
[CROWD LAUGHING]
15
00:00:59,407 --> 00:01:02,540
Ahem! Do you mind?
16
00:01:02,627 --> 00:01:05,630
Please. Regale us about
this epic contest.
17
00:01:05,717 --> 00:01:09,199
Well! There I was,
at the mouth of the cave...
18
00:01:09,286 --> 00:01:11,854
Cut to the chase!
Were you successful?
19
00:01:11,941 --> 00:01:14,596
[GROANS] If you weren't
such a fool, you'd know
20
00:01:14,683 --> 00:01:19,427
-I am always successful
in any contest.
-Any contest?
21
00:01:19,514 --> 00:01:21,603
What about Miss Idaho, 2016?
22
00:01:21,690 --> 00:01:23,039
[CROWD LAUGHING]
23
00:01:25,128 --> 00:01:29,001
Enough! Dirk and I
don't find you amusing.
24
00:01:29,089 --> 00:01:30,525
"Dirk"? Who's Dirk?
25
00:01:30,612 --> 00:01:32,788
My sword.
26
00:01:33,832 --> 00:01:35,878
You named your sword?
27
00:01:35,965 --> 00:01:41,231
Yes. Dirk is my best friend,
he's always at my side.
[SMOOCHING]
28
00:01:41,318 --> 00:01:44,539
[LAUGHING] Okay.
You think that's weird?
29
00:01:44,626 --> 00:01:47,150
When you ask him
about his horse, he says
"It's complicated."
30
00:01:47,237 --> 00:01:49,021
[CROWD LAUGHING]
31
00:01:49,109 --> 00:01:52,416
So let me guess, these must be
the twins, Maxwell and Tybalt.
32
00:01:52,503 --> 00:01:56,420
And Aunt Rose.
I haven't see you since
the gauntlet run. [KISSES]
33
00:01:58,335 --> 00:02:00,120
-[CROWD LAUGHING]
-[SIR LITTLECHIN GROWLING]
34
00:02:00,207 --> 00:02:02,383
Well that's my time,
you've all been
a wonderful crowd.
35
00:02:02,470 --> 00:02:06,604
I'll be back for my second set
in one one-hundredths
of a fortnight.
36
00:02:06,691 --> 00:02:09,825
-Uh-huh, right.
Uh-huh. No way!
-[INDISTINCT TALKING ON PHONE]
37
00:02:09,912 --> 00:02:13,742
Of course!
I was killing 'em out there,
Jackie, killing 'em! Phew.
38
00:02:13,829 --> 00:02:16,875
Okay, you got it Jackie,
talk to you soon.
39
00:02:19,661 --> 00:02:21,315
Can I help you, buster?
40
00:02:21,402 --> 00:02:24,579
You mocked me, jester!
41
00:02:24,666 --> 00:02:28,887
I am the greatest
swordsman in all the land,
and I will not be mocked!
42
00:02:28,974 --> 00:02:31,194
Don't you mean, you and Dirk
will not be mocked?
43
00:02:31,281 --> 00:02:32,935
[GROANS]
44
00:02:33,022 --> 00:02:35,242
That's it!
I challenge you to a...
45
00:02:35,329 --> 00:02:36,939
Hey, wait a minute!
46
00:02:37,026 --> 00:02:38,506
-A duel?
-Yes, but you
didn't let me finish.
47
00:02:38,593 --> 00:02:40,638
Oh, by all means, continue.
48
00:02:40,725 --> 00:02:42,771
Thank you. As I was saying,
I challenge you to a...
49
00:02:42,858 --> 00:02:44,120
A duel?
50
00:02:44,207 --> 00:02:45,687
-Stop that!
-Stop what?
51
00:02:45,774 --> 00:02:46,818
You're hitting me
just before I say the word...
52
00:02:46,905 --> 00:02:49,473
-A duel?
-[GROANS]
53
00:02:49,560 --> 00:02:54,957
Let me explain how
this works. In order to
challenge you to a... [GASPS]
54
00:02:55,044 --> 00:02:56,524
[STAMMERING] To a, uh...
55
00:02:59,396 --> 00:03:01,920
...a confrontation...
56
00:03:02,007 --> 00:03:05,097
I need to take off my glove
and slap you in the face.
57
00:03:05,185 --> 00:03:06,490
-Like this?
-[YELPS]
58
00:03:06,577 --> 00:03:07,709
I challenge you to...
59
00:03:07,796 --> 00:03:09,580
-A duel!
-Ah! Oh! Ugh! Argh!
60
00:03:09,667 --> 00:03:13,323
-Like that?
-Yes. Exactly.
Now give me that glove...
61
00:03:13,410 --> 00:03:15,586
[SCREAMS] Come on, that time
I didn't even say...
62
00:03:15,673 --> 00:03:17,806
-[GRUNTS]
-A duel?
63
00:03:17,893 --> 00:03:21,549
Look! If you won't hand me
the glove, how can I
challenge you to a...
64
00:03:22,332 --> 00:03:24,552
To a... [GROANS]
65
00:03:25,379 --> 00:03:26,336
Say it.
66
00:03:27,294 --> 00:03:29,296
To a duel.
67
00:03:29,383 --> 00:03:31,994
Listen bub,
you don't need a glove
to challenge me,
68
00:03:32,081 --> 00:03:34,344
you can use a bass!
69
00:03:34,431 --> 00:03:37,086
-How about a barbecue?
-[GROANS]
70
00:03:37,173 --> 00:03:39,654
-Or a bazooka?
-[SCREAMS]
71
00:03:39,741 --> 00:03:41,003
So, you wanna duel?
72
00:03:43,484 --> 00:03:47,183
Dirk and I accept.
73
00:03:47,270 --> 00:03:50,926
[GROANS] Tonight
we dine on duck.
74
00:03:51,013 --> 00:03:53,102
Tally-ho!
75
00:03:53,189 --> 00:03:57,019
Hold it right there.
Wouldst thou allow me
a moment, good knight,
76
00:03:57,106 --> 00:04:00,022
to don
the satisfactory regalia?
77
00:04:00,109 --> 00:04:02,372
Of course,
of course, your armor.
78
00:04:02,459 --> 00:04:07,029
'Tis a knight's code to never
engage the enemy
when they are ill-prepared.
79
00:04:07,116 --> 00:04:10,206
'-Just let me know
when you're ready.
-[CLOTHES RUSTLING]
80
00:04:10,293 --> 00:04:12,991
Okay. How do I look?
81
00:04:13,078 --> 00:04:15,559
[CHUCKLING] Why,
you look splendid.
82
00:04:15,646 --> 00:04:18,562
Well, off to my knight shift.
83
00:04:18,649 --> 00:04:20,695
[EXCLAIMS] Ah!
He gave me the slip.
84
00:04:20,782 --> 00:04:22,262
[GIGGLING]
85
00:04:24,873 --> 00:04:26,048
En garde!
86
00:04:26,788 --> 00:04:28,093
[GIGGLING]
87
00:04:28,920 --> 00:04:30,792
[GRUNTING]
88
00:04:30,879 --> 00:04:33,490
Our world-famous
chopped salad.
89
00:04:33,577 --> 00:04:36,754
Hope you like fast food!
[GIGGLING]
90
00:04:38,103 --> 00:04:39,104
[GAGGING]
91
00:04:41,106 --> 00:04:42,107
[GRUNTS]
92
00:04:46,024 --> 00:04:47,025
[GIGGLING]
93
00:04:50,072 --> 00:04:51,073
[YELLS]
94
00:04:52,466 --> 00:04:53,728
[SCREAMING]
95
00:04:55,338 --> 00:04:57,514
What what what?
That's my horse!
96
00:04:57,601 --> 00:05:00,125
-[NEIGHS]
-Horse thief.
Give it to me.
97
00:05:00,212 --> 00:05:02,824
Oh, I'm gonna
give it to him all right.
98
00:05:02,911 --> 00:05:04,434
All you had to do was ask.
99
00:05:06,349 --> 00:05:09,309
At last, we finish
this duel on my own turf.
100
00:05:09,396 --> 00:05:11,920
Squires! Bring me my...
101
00:05:12,007 --> 00:05:14,531
You leave me
no choice but to...
102
00:05:14,618 --> 00:05:17,447
[GASPS] My Dirk!
103
00:05:17,534 --> 00:05:21,625
[MOANING] Yet another
triumphant contest.
104
00:05:21,712 --> 00:05:23,671
-[CRASHES]
-[THUDS]
105
00:05:23,758 --> 00:05:27,283
Sometimes Mommy
makes me cinnamon
toast before night-night.
106
00:05:27,370 --> 00:05:28,328
[GROANS]
107
00:05:29,590 --> 00:05:31,505
[CROWD LAUGHING]
108
00:05:31,592 --> 00:05:33,942
Don't quit your knight job.
109
00:05:34,029 --> 00:05:37,902
Dirk, I think this is
the beginning of
a beautiful friendship.
110
00:05:44,648 --> 00:05:45,954
Well, well, well,
111
00:05:46,041 --> 00:05:49,523
it all comes down
to this final shot.
112
00:05:49,610 --> 00:05:52,526
This one's for all the nuts.
113
00:05:52,613 --> 00:05:55,442
I guess you could call it,
"all or nuttin'"!
114
00:05:57,095 --> 00:05:58,096
[EXCLAIMS]
115
00:05:58,836 --> 00:06:01,404
Aww, too bad.
116
00:06:01,491 --> 00:06:02,449
[GROANS]
117
00:06:05,277 --> 00:06:07,149
[LAUGHING]
118
00:06:07,236 --> 00:06:10,761
Better luck next time.
I'll beat you again,
if you want.
119
00:06:10,848 --> 00:06:13,547
But you're all out of nuts,
so why bother?
120
00:06:13,634 --> 00:06:14,939
[LAUGHING]
121
00:06:16,854 --> 00:06:18,595
BUGS: Hey.
122
00:06:18,682 --> 00:06:20,597
Why don't you pick on
someone your own size?
123
00:06:22,469 --> 00:06:25,733
If you wanna play,
you gotta have something
to play for.
124
00:06:25,820 --> 00:06:29,258
-How about this?
-That ain't no good here.
125
00:06:29,345 --> 00:06:31,869
I'm talking nuts,
lots of nuts.
126
00:06:31,956 --> 00:06:33,436
-[GRUNTS]
-Is that enough?
127
00:06:34,394 --> 00:06:36,047
Yeah. That'll do.
128
00:06:36,134 --> 00:06:38,659
All right, Squeaks,
rack 'em up.
129
00:06:38,746 --> 00:06:40,661
Brought you own pool cue, huh?
130
00:06:40,748 --> 00:06:43,185
Of course. I never
leave home without it.
131
00:06:43,272 --> 00:06:46,057
Oops. [CHUCKLES]
Wrong pool. Here we go.
132
00:06:47,145 --> 00:06:48,146
[CHIRPS]
133
00:06:50,845 --> 00:06:52,586
That's better.
134
00:06:52,673 --> 00:06:54,196
-Don't... Miss!
-[YELPS]
135
00:06:54,892 --> 00:06:55,893
Huh? Oi...
136
00:06:57,025 --> 00:06:58,418
[LAUGHING]
137
00:06:59,288 --> 00:07:00,332
What the... What?
138
00:07:04,902 --> 00:07:07,427
[POOL BALLS KNOCKING]
139
00:07:07,514 --> 00:07:11,735
Oops, they all went in
at the beginning,
is that okay?
140
00:07:11,822 --> 00:07:15,130
You hustled me!
You ain't leaving
till I beat you.
141
00:07:15,217 --> 00:07:17,698
And I'm breaking this time.
142
00:07:19,395 --> 00:07:21,049
-Now watch this.
-Call your shot.
143
00:07:21,136 --> 00:07:23,094
You don't call
your shot on a break!
144
00:07:23,181 --> 00:07:26,010
Maybe not
for a novice like you,
but for us professionals...
145
00:07:26,097 --> 00:07:29,710
Hey, I am a professional!
One in the corner pocket.
146
00:07:32,756 --> 00:07:36,412
-Oh, so close.
Now it's my turn.
-[GROWLING]
147
00:07:36,499 --> 00:07:38,327
Eleven-ball
in the corner pocket.
148
00:07:39,546 --> 00:07:42,244
Thirteen in the side.
149
00:07:42,331 --> 00:07:44,855
Wait a minute.
That ball didn't
go in the side pocket.
150
00:07:44,942 --> 00:07:48,163
I didn't specify which one.
Check your side pocket.
151
00:07:48,990 --> 00:07:51,209
What the? Okay...
152
00:07:51,296 --> 00:07:55,387
-This time you
play me blindfolded.
-If you insist.
153
00:07:58,086 --> 00:08:00,349
Ah, ah, ah, no peeking.
154
00:08:00,436 --> 00:08:04,440
No, I'm not supposed to wear
the blindfold. You are!
155
00:08:04,527 --> 00:08:07,704
No way! That's impossible.
How could I see?
156
00:08:07,791 --> 00:08:10,838
-[SQUARE DANCE MUSIC PLAYING]
-Now, nine bows to the ten
and swings to the corner.
157
00:08:10,925 --> 00:08:13,014
Thirteen and twelve,
do-si-do to the side.
158
00:08:13,101 --> 00:08:15,190
Fourteen and eight,
promenade to the corner.
159
00:08:15,277 --> 00:08:17,758
And skip to the lou
my darling!
160
00:08:17,845 --> 00:08:22,502
All right, no more
messing around.
Best outta three.
161
00:08:22,589 --> 00:08:25,940
-But I beat you twice already.
-I meant best outta five!
162
00:08:26,027 --> 00:08:29,030
And this time,
I choose the cues.
163
00:08:29,117 --> 00:08:32,860
This one's mine,
and this one's yours.
164
00:08:32,947 --> 00:08:34,862
This cue is
as crooked as he is.
165
00:08:34,949 --> 00:08:37,386
-[LAUGHING]
-[WHIMPERING]
166
00:08:38,082 --> 00:08:40,215
[MOCK LAUGHING]
167
00:08:41,303 --> 00:08:42,304
[BOTH EXCLAIM]
168
00:08:44,785 --> 00:08:49,746
-Ooh, this cane's
got some sugar.
-Gimme that thing.
169
00:08:49,833 --> 00:08:53,663
All right. I'm gonna
show him how it's... Ow!
170
00:08:53,750 --> 00:08:56,797
Wow, doc, that last
sure was a knockout!
171
00:08:56,884 --> 00:09:00,757
-Lemme give you another cue,
the cue to leave.
-[GRUNTING]
172
00:09:00,844 --> 00:09:06,589
All right, I've had it!
One final game.
Winner takes all the nuts.
173
00:09:06,676 --> 00:09:09,200
So, lemme get this straight,
winner wins?
174
00:09:09,287 --> 00:09:11,986
-Yes, winner wins.
-For all the nuts?
175
00:09:12,073 --> 00:09:14,075
Winner wins all the nuts.
176
00:09:14,162 --> 00:09:16,251
-All of them?
-Yes!
177
00:09:16,338 --> 00:09:18,514
-For all the nuts?
-Yes!
178
00:09:18,601 --> 00:09:20,821
Your loss, pal.
179
00:09:20,908 --> 00:09:24,476
I'm gonna have to pull out
all the stops, if I'm gonna
beat this rabbit.
180
00:09:24,564 --> 00:09:26,740
-[DISCO MUSIC PLAYING]
-[SNAPS FINGERS]
181
00:09:28,524 --> 00:09:30,265
[LOUD DRUMMING]
182
00:09:32,006 --> 00:09:33,311
[REVVING]
183
00:09:35,487 --> 00:09:36,793
[AIR HORN BLOWING]
184
00:09:39,361 --> 00:09:41,276
Hmm. This is gonna be tricky.
185
00:09:41,363 --> 00:09:43,844
-[SQUEAKS]
-That shot's impossible!
186
00:09:43,931 --> 00:09:48,500
The nine-ball's gotta go in
before the eight-ball,
or you lose!
187
00:09:48,588 --> 00:09:50,590
Then I guess I better
make this shot count.
188
00:09:52,983 --> 00:09:55,638
-Ha ha! You missed!
-Did I?
189
00:10:02,036 --> 00:10:03,080
Huh?
190
00:10:05,387 --> 00:10:10,697
-And eight-ball
in the corner pocket.
-[SQUEAKS TRIUMPHANTLY]
191
00:10:10,784 --> 00:10:14,439
I will not be made a fool of
in my own pool hall!
192
00:10:18,705 --> 00:10:22,056
-Enough.
-BYSTANDERS: [MURMURING]
Oh! It's Rats.
193
00:10:22,143 --> 00:10:28,062
Holy smokes, is it really him?
Minnesota Rats, the greatest
pool player who ever lived?
194
00:10:28,149 --> 00:10:33,502
I've been watching these
events unfold, and frankly,
I'm disappointed.
195
00:10:33,589 --> 00:10:38,768
You don't play fair,
and that ain't right.
Ramses, show him the door.
196
00:10:39,987 --> 00:10:41,249
-[CRASHES]
-SHIFTY: Ow!
197
00:10:41,336 --> 00:10:43,686
-Now open it for him.
-[DOOR OPENS]
198
00:10:43,773 --> 00:10:46,602
-[SHIFTY YELLING]
-[CRASHES]
199
00:10:46,689 --> 00:10:51,694
Hey there, you're pretty good.
Care to join me for a game
at my reserve table?
200
00:10:51,781 --> 00:10:54,610
Thanks, but no thanks.
I know when
I'm out of my league.
201
00:10:54,697 --> 00:10:57,831
I'm gonna play in a real pool.
Come on, Squeaks.
202
00:10:57,918 --> 00:10:59,484
[SQUEAKS HUMMING]
15208
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof