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1
00:00:04,308 --> 00:00:06,093
- 'Come on.'
- Oh, no.
2
00:00:06,180 --> 00:00:09,052
Yes! I got another planet!
Uranus is mine!
3
00:00:14,057 --> 00:00:15,319
I cannot believe you guys.
4
00:00:15,406 --> 00:00:17,147
I have been gone for four hours
5
00:00:17,234 --> 00:00:19,889
and you are still playing
with your joysticks.
6
00:00:22,065 --> 00:00:23,545
We've been here that long?
7
00:00:23,632 --> 00:00:25,460
Man, we're really
gettin' our quarter's worth.
8
00:00:27,244 --> 00:00:30,073
Woo-hoo! Yes!
Victory is mine!
9
00:00:30,160 --> 00:00:31,814
Yes, wonderful.
Can we go home now?
10
00:00:31,901 --> 00:00:33,250
Oh, but, honey,
we just won a bonus game.
11
00:00:33,337 --> 00:00:34,556
I promise, it won't take
more than, what
12
00:00:34,643 --> 00:00:37,080
three-four hours, tops.
13
00:00:37,167 --> 00:00:38,951
Well, I've had enough
of this virtual stupidity.
14
00:00:39,039 --> 00:00:40,649
- I'll see you at home.
- Okay, honey.
15
00:00:43,391 --> 00:00:44,957
Yo! Halke.
16
00:00:45,045 --> 00:00:46,655
I get the next game.
17
00:00:46,742 --> 00:00:49,571
And I am gonna kick your butt.
18
00:00:49,658 --> 00:00:51,007
No way.
19
00:00:51,094 --> 00:00:53,531
- Cassie!
- The one and only.
20
00:00:53,618 --> 00:00:54,619
[both screaming]
21
00:00:54,706 --> 00:00:55,707
[laughing]
22
00:00:55,794 --> 00:00:57,318
Oh, when'd you get here?
23
00:00:57,405 --> 00:00:58,580
How long are you stayin'?
Where'd you come from?
24
00:00:58,667 --> 00:01:00,277
Yesterday. Indefinitely.
Sheboygan.
25
00:01:00,364 --> 00:01:01,322
- Uh, hi--
- Sheboygan.
26
00:01:01,409 --> 00:01:02,497
Oh, this is so awesome!
27
00:01:02,584 --> 00:01:04,455
[both laughing]
28
00:01:04,542 --> 00:01:06,066
What are you doin' here?
29
00:01:06,153 --> 00:01:07,806
Well, my family moved back
to town and they said
30
00:01:07,893 --> 00:01:08,981
if I wanna keep
spongin' off 'em
31
00:01:09,069 --> 00:01:10,809
I gotta go
to East Wisconsin U.
32
00:01:10,896 --> 00:01:13,595
I can't believe
you're really here. Hey!
33
00:01:13,682 --> 00:01:16,815
Hey, there. Hi!
34
00:01:16,902 --> 00:01:18,426
I'm Dana. Rich's girlfriend.
35
00:01:18,513 --> 00:01:21,385
Oh, what's up, girlfriend?
36
00:01:21,472 --> 00:01:23,126
Oh, honey, I'm sorry,
Cassie and I were like
37
00:01:23,213 --> 00:01:24,519
best friends in junior high.
38
00:01:24,606 --> 00:01:27,087
We flunked Social Studies
together, remember?
39
00:01:27,174 --> 00:01:29,393
- That's special.
- Yeah!
40
00:01:29,480 --> 00:01:31,700
Oh, it's gonna be
just like old times.
41
00:01:31,787 --> 00:01:32,962
Cass and the Halke-ster.
42
00:01:33,049 --> 00:01:34,833
- Homies again.
- Homies again!
43
00:01:34,920 --> 00:01:36,270
Oh, this is great.
I think this is great.
44
00:01:36,357 --> 00:01:37,532
- Isn't this great?
- Yes.
45
00:01:37,619 --> 00:01:40,274
Oh, yeah. It's great.
46
00:01:41,188 --> 00:01:43,103
[grunting]
47
00:01:43,190 --> 00:01:45,670
[theme music]
48
00:01:45,757 --> 00:01:47,716
♪ Step by step ♪
49
00:01:47,803 --> 00:01:49,674
♪ Day by day ♪♪ Day by day ♪
50
00:01:49,761 --> 00:01:51,415
♪ A fresh start over ♪
51
00:01:51,502 --> 00:01:53,330
♪ A different hand to play ♪
52
00:01:53,417 --> 00:01:57,378
♪ The deeper we fall
the stronger we stay ♪
53
00:01:57,465 --> 00:01:59,554
♪ We'll make it better ♪
54
00:01:59,641 --> 00:02:02,165
♪ The second time around ♪♪
55
00:02:14,786 --> 00:02:17,267
[opera music]
56
00:02:25,145 --> 00:02:27,625
[sighs]
Isn't it magnificent?
57
00:02:27,712 --> 00:02:29,975
It's so passionate, so moving.
58
00:02:30,062 --> 00:02:32,804
I mean, have you ever heard
anything like this?
59
00:02:32,891 --> 00:02:34,154
Rich?
60
00:02:35,372 --> 00:02:36,373
Tsk. Rich!
61
00:02:36,460 --> 00:02:37,548
Yeah? Oh. Oh.
62
00:02:37,635 --> 00:02:41,291
Bravo! Encore!
You're the man!
63
00:02:41,378 --> 00:02:44,816
Rich, if you are not interested
in Pagliacci, you can leave.
64
00:02:44,903 --> 00:02:46,949
I did not crazy glue you
to the sofa.
65
00:02:47,036 --> 00:02:49,473
Honey, no, no, no. I enjoy
watching these things with you.
66
00:02:49,560 --> 00:02:51,823
I mean, what better form of
entertainment than to watch a..
67
00:02:51,910 --> 00:02:53,434
...bunch of fat people
screamin' at each other
68
00:02:53,521 --> 00:02:54,870
in a foreign tongue?
69
00:02:56,698 --> 00:02:57,960
No, honey, you know, I just
70
00:02:58,047 --> 00:02:59,831
I had a really long day,
I'm just exhausted.
71
00:02:59,918 --> 00:03:01,311
Maybe I just
need a little nap.
72
00:03:01,398 --> 00:03:02,573
[doorbell dings]
73
00:03:02,660 --> 00:03:04,009
Would you get that, hon?
74
00:03:05,054 --> 00:03:06,708
Excuse me.
75
00:03:11,016 --> 00:03:14,281
- Cassie, hi.
- Hey! How you doin', Dona?
76
00:03:14,368 --> 00:03:16,021
- It's Dana.
- Ooh.
77
00:03:16,108 --> 00:03:17,501
Gee, you look like a Dona.
78
00:03:19,199 --> 00:03:20,461
Hey, Halke.
79
00:03:20,548 --> 00:03:22,506
Hey, Cassie!
What're you doin' here?
80
00:03:22,593 --> 00:03:24,726
Well, I'm broke and I needed
to find a sucker
81
00:03:24,813 --> 00:03:26,380
I can hustle out of some cash.
82
00:03:26,467 --> 00:03:30,035
- So, wanna play pool, sucker?
- Oh, yes!
83
00:03:30,122 --> 00:03:32,951
Oh, no, uh..
84
00:03:33,038 --> 00:03:35,693
I, uh, I'm watchin'
this really great opera
85
00:03:35,780 --> 00:03:37,913
this, uh, Polly itchy?
86
00:03:40,002 --> 00:03:41,656
Rich, it's Pagliacci.
87
00:03:41,743 --> 00:03:44,311
And look, if you wanna go
play with Cassie, then go.
88
00:03:44,398 --> 00:03:45,877
- Oh, no, hon, I really wanna..
- Honey, I'm sure you're not..
89
00:03:45,964 --> 00:03:48,097
[indistinct chatter]
90
00:03:48,184 --> 00:03:49,403
I want you to go
play pool with Cassie.
91
00:03:49,490 --> 00:03:50,795
Okay. Bye, honey.
92
00:03:52,319 --> 00:03:53,276
Later, Dona.
93
00:03:53,363 --> 00:03:54,364
It's Dana.
94
00:03:54,451 --> 00:03:55,496
Ooh!
95
00:03:55,583 --> 00:03:57,498
Sorry, you still
look like a Dona.
96
00:03:59,064 --> 00:04:01,980
[instrumental music]
97
00:04:06,071 --> 00:04:08,987
- Ooh, hi, honey.
- Oh, just the man I wanna see.
98
00:04:09,074 --> 00:04:11,076
Have I got good news for you.
99
00:04:11,163 --> 00:04:12,948
What, all the kids
are gone and you wanna play
100
00:04:13,035 --> 00:04:15,211
"The lonely housewife
and the lucky cable guy?"
101
00:04:16,517 --> 00:04:18,345
- Maybe later.
- Okay.
102
00:04:18,432 --> 00:04:20,477
No, the good news is
your favorite cousin called.
103
00:04:20,564 --> 00:04:23,001
I invited him over,
he'll be here real soon.
104
00:04:23,088 --> 00:04:24,873
Oh, that's great.
105
00:04:24,960 --> 00:04:28,137
- My cousin Art is coming.
- No, your cousin Bert.
106
00:04:28,224 --> 00:04:30,008
Bert? Bert, the bum?
The bum is coming?
107
00:04:31,967 --> 00:04:34,404
Well, I don't understand. He
said you two were inseparable.
108
00:04:34,491 --> 00:04:36,580
Well, yeah, that's because
when I was five
109
00:04:36,667 --> 00:04:38,756
he put me on a leash
and he charged kids ten cents
110
00:04:38,843 --> 00:04:41,281
to pet Bo-Bo,
the big-headed monkey boy.
111
00:04:43,283 --> 00:04:45,676
Honey, Bert is a liar
and a bum.
112
00:04:45,763 --> 00:04:49,289
And he never gave me a dime
of that Bo-Bo, the monkey money.
113
00:04:49,376 --> 00:04:51,943
Oh, Frank, he's family.
How bad can he be?
114
00:04:52,030 --> 00:04:54,990
He lost Uncle Wally's glass eye
in a marble game.
115
00:04:56,513 --> 00:04:58,210
And I loaned him
a 100 bucks in 1972
116
00:04:58,298 --> 00:04:59,690
and he never paid me back.
117
00:04:59,777 --> 00:05:02,824
Well, that was a long time ago.
People can change.
118
00:05:02,911 --> 00:05:04,695
Well, we're not stickin'
around to find out.
119
00:05:04,782 --> 00:05:06,218
You get the kids,
we're gonna jump
120
00:05:06,306 --> 00:05:09,091
in the car and go to dinner
in-in-in Canada.
121
00:05:09,178 --> 00:05:10,179
[doorbell dings]
122
00:05:10,266 --> 00:05:11,659
Oh, don't answer that. Don't.
123
00:05:11,746 --> 00:05:13,748
- Grow up, Frank.
- 'No!'
124
00:05:15,576 --> 00:05:17,142
The old Frankfurter!
125
00:05:17,229 --> 00:05:19,188
I bet you haven't heard
that name in a while.
126
00:05:19,275 --> 00:05:21,321
- Hey! Boop, boop, boop.
- What? Ugh!
127
00:05:22,278 --> 00:05:23,801
No, and I still hate it.
128
00:05:23,888 --> 00:05:26,674
Oh, still the same old
Cranky Frankie.
129
00:05:26,761 --> 00:05:28,589
Come on, big guy,
give your cuz a hug.
130
00:05:28,676 --> 00:05:29,677
Now..
131
00:05:29,764 --> 00:05:31,374
Ah!
132
00:05:31,461 --> 00:05:33,158
[sighs]
133
00:05:33,245 --> 00:05:34,725
Hi.
134
00:05:34,812 --> 00:05:36,727
Ooh, hey, you must be Carol.
135
00:05:36,814 --> 00:05:38,599
Man, you sounded gorgeous
on the phone
136
00:05:38,686 --> 00:05:40,340
but whoa, mama!
137
00:05:42,342 --> 00:05:44,300
I like him already, Frank.
138
00:05:44,387 --> 00:05:46,084
Yeah, well, wait till
you've known him 30 seconds.
139
00:05:46,171 --> 00:05:49,044
[laughs]
140
00:05:49,131 --> 00:05:52,352
Loosen up, Frank. Look how glad
Bert is to see you.
141
00:05:52,439 --> 00:05:54,049
Glad? I am thrilled!
142
00:05:54,136 --> 00:05:55,833
There is no way
in the world I would pass
143
00:05:55,920 --> 00:05:57,444
through town
after all these years
144
00:05:57,531 --> 00:05:59,794
without stopping by
to see my favorite cuz.
145
00:05:59,881 --> 00:06:02,013
Oh, just passin' through. Well,
gee, don't let me stop you.
146
00:06:02,100 --> 00:06:04,015
Okay, let's do this again
in another 25 years.
147
00:06:04,102 --> 00:06:06,017
Hey, quit your horsin' around,
you big lug!
148
00:06:06,104 --> 00:06:09,630
Your beautiful wife has already
invited me to stay for dinner.
149
00:06:11,371 --> 00:06:13,721
Remember the last time
you and I had dinner?
150
00:06:13,808 --> 00:06:15,070
Sure, I do.
151
00:06:15,157 --> 00:06:16,419
He invited me out
and then he tried
152
00:06:16,506 --> 00:06:18,247
to pay with
an expired credit card.
153
00:06:18,334 --> 00:06:20,554
He snuck out the back, I spent
two weeks wearin' a hair neck
154
00:06:20,641 --> 00:06:22,686
cleanin' the grease
out of drains.
155
00:06:22,773 --> 00:06:23,992
That was fun.
156
00:06:24,079 --> 00:06:26,429
That's my Bo-Bo,
the monkey boy!
157
00:06:26,516 --> 00:06:27,778
[whooping]
158
00:06:27,865 --> 00:06:30,477
[instrumental music]
159
00:06:34,263 --> 00:06:37,788
Hey, Bert, let me
ask you a question.
160
00:06:37,875 --> 00:06:40,704
Of all the places you've been
in the entire world
161
00:06:40,791 --> 00:06:42,402
which one was your favorite?
162
00:06:42,489 --> 00:06:45,448
Oh, no contest. Tahiti.
163
00:06:45,535 --> 00:06:48,886
Soft white beaches,
crystal clear water
164
00:06:48,973 --> 00:06:50,540
and a sunset so beautiful
165
00:06:50,627 --> 00:06:52,542
it would make a grown man cry.
166
00:06:55,066 --> 00:06:57,199
Sorry, I might need a minute.
167
00:06:59,244 --> 00:07:01,464
That's beautiful.
168
00:07:01,551 --> 00:07:03,292
Yeah, but, hey,
not half as beautiful
169
00:07:03,379 --> 00:07:04,728
as the women at this table.
170
00:07:04,815 --> 00:07:06,469
I swear,
I feel like I'm havin'
171
00:07:06,556 --> 00:07:08,079
dinner at the
Miss Universe pageant.
172
00:07:08,166 --> 00:07:10,212
Yeah, well, that's great.
173
00:07:11,735 --> 00:07:12,997
Why don't you save
some of that?
174
00:07:13,084 --> 00:07:14,521
I need the fertilizer
for the yard.
175
00:07:14,608 --> 00:07:17,219
- 'Oh!'
- Frank?
176
00:07:17,306 --> 00:07:18,960
May I see you in the living room
for a minute, please?
177
00:07:19,047 --> 00:07:20,701
Sure. I could use
a little fresh air.
178
00:07:20,788 --> 00:07:22,006
Hey, uh, Bert.
179
00:07:22,093 --> 00:07:23,225
Listen, don't do
anything funny there.
180
00:07:23,312 --> 00:07:24,792
I counted all the silverware.
181
00:07:24,879 --> 00:07:25,967
[Carol]
'Frank.'
182
00:07:28,099 --> 00:07:30,275
Alright, alright.
I know what you're gonna say.
183
00:07:30,362 --> 00:07:32,016
You think I'm bein' rude.
Well, I don't care.
184
00:07:32,103 --> 00:07:33,670
- I don't like the guy.
- Well, maybe not.
185
00:07:33,757 --> 00:07:35,890
But could you at least
try to be civil?
186
00:07:35,977 --> 00:07:38,414
My God, Frank, Marv Albert
would get a better reception
187
00:07:38,501 --> 00:07:41,025
at a feminist rally.
188
00:07:41,112 --> 00:07:42,200
[sighs]
189
00:07:42,287 --> 00:07:44,246
Carol, you don't understand.
190
00:07:44,333 --> 00:07:45,943
- Bert is bad news.
- Frank--
191
00:07:46,030 --> 00:07:48,206
I don't trust the guy.
I want him out of this house.
192
00:07:48,293 --> 00:07:50,339
No, no, listen, no matter what
you say, I'm gonna tell him.
193
00:07:50,426 --> 00:07:52,820
Frank. I don't think you have
to bother, he already knows.
194
00:07:54,952 --> 00:07:58,652
Uh, don't be angry
at Frank, Carol.
195
00:07:58,739 --> 00:08:01,393
He has every reason
to feel the way he does.
196
00:08:01,481 --> 00:08:04,614
You see, the old Bert
was a pretty bad guy.
197
00:08:04,701 --> 00:08:07,095
He was a liar and a thief.
198
00:08:07,182 --> 00:08:09,489
But what Frank doesn't know
is I'm a changed man.
199
00:08:09,576 --> 00:08:11,229
I found the error of my ways.
200
00:08:11,316 --> 00:08:12,709
You found religion?
201
00:08:12,796 --> 00:08:14,711
No, incarceration.
202
00:08:16,539 --> 00:08:18,759
Uh, well, see there.
What'd they get you for, huh?
203
00:08:18,846 --> 00:08:22,023
Petty larceny, check fraud,
white slavery?
204
00:08:22,110 --> 00:08:23,590
Well, actually I was trying
205
00:08:23,677 --> 00:08:25,679
to sell something
that wasn't mine.
206
00:08:25,766 --> 00:08:28,029
- What?
- Arizona.
207
00:08:30,292 --> 00:08:32,990
So, I guess
I'll be leaving now.
208
00:08:33,077 --> 00:08:35,471
Okay, bye.
209
00:08:35,558 --> 00:08:38,343
But, hey, before I go,
I got something I wanna give ya.
210
00:08:38,430 --> 00:08:40,432
I have done my time
211
00:08:40,520 --> 00:08:42,478
and now I am paying my debts.
212
00:08:42,565 --> 00:08:45,655
Here's the $100 I owe ya,
plus $200 interest.
213
00:08:48,876 --> 00:08:50,355
Gee, Bert, I..
214
00:08:50,442 --> 00:08:51,661
I don't know what to say.
215
00:08:51,748 --> 00:08:52,967
Ah, you don't have
to say anything, Frank.
216
00:08:53,054 --> 00:08:54,664
I'm just hoping that
somehow you can
217
00:08:54,751 --> 00:08:56,797
find it in your heart
to forgive me..
218
00:08:57,885 --> 00:08:59,103
...someday.
219
00:09:05,370 --> 00:09:06,371
Yeah.
220
00:09:06,458 --> 00:09:08,765
Well, nice meeting you, Carol.
221
00:09:08,852 --> 00:09:11,159
- Thanks for a wonderful dinner.
- It was my pleasure.
222
00:09:11,246 --> 00:09:13,291
[sighs]
223
00:09:18,558 --> 00:09:19,733
[sighs]
224
00:09:21,865 --> 00:09:23,911
Okay, okay, okay, okay.
225
00:09:23,998 --> 00:09:26,043
- 'Hey, uh, Bert.'
- Yeah?
226
00:09:28,872 --> 00:09:32,354
Listen, y-you haven't
had dessert yet and Carol
227
00:09:32,441 --> 00:09:34,878
she makes a pretty mean
strawberry shortcake.
228
00:09:34,965 --> 00:09:38,795
- You mean it?
- Yeah, I mean it.
229
00:09:38,882 --> 00:09:41,319
Oh, thanks,
you little Frankfurter!
230
00:09:41,406 --> 00:09:44,061
[groans]
See that? Could you stop
with the Frankfurter stuff?
231
00:09:44,148 --> 00:09:45,672
You got it, Cranky Frankie.
232
00:09:45,759 --> 00:09:47,761
Hey! Boop, boop, boop.
233
00:09:47,848 --> 00:09:50,720
[instrumental music]
234
00:09:59,207 --> 00:10:00,338
[both chuckle]
235
00:10:02,514 --> 00:10:05,517
Dana, uh, is that,
is that you?
236
00:10:05,605 --> 00:10:08,912
Wearing an apron
and making food?
237
00:10:08,999 --> 00:10:11,828
Oh, my God! She's been possessed
by June Cleaver.
238
00:10:13,874 --> 00:10:15,571
Very funny.
239
00:10:15,658 --> 00:10:18,008
It's no big deal,
I am just packing lunch
240
00:10:18,095 --> 00:10:20,924
for me and Rich
to take down to the lake.
241
00:10:21,011 --> 00:10:24,406
What happened to your usual,
"Saturdays are for study?"
242
00:10:25,842 --> 00:10:27,931
I plan on doing
a little studying.
243
00:10:28,018 --> 00:10:31,282
Going to study his lips
and let him study mine.
244
00:10:33,415 --> 00:10:36,461
I knew it, I knew Rich spending
all that time with Cassie
245
00:10:36,548 --> 00:10:38,812
was starting to get to you.
246
00:10:38,899 --> 00:10:40,291
Fine, you're right.
247
00:10:40,378 --> 00:10:42,903
But he's not gonna
be with Cassie today.
248
00:10:42,990 --> 00:10:45,906
Because I am going
to take him down to the lake
249
00:10:45,993 --> 00:10:48,299
ply him with a chicken sandwich
250
00:10:48,386 --> 00:10:51,999
and sugar-coated
fruit-tooties..
251
00:10:52,086 --> 00:10:53,478
...and rock his world.
252
00:10:54,479 --> 00:10:56,873
You go, girl!
253
00:10:56,960 --> 00:10:59,006
- Hello, ladies.
- Hey, Rich.
254
00:10:59,093 --> 00:11:01,051
Boy, are you in
for a good day.
255
00:11:01,138 --> 00:11:02,879
Oh, tell me about it,
Cassie got us tickets
256
00:11:02,966 --> 00:11:05,186
to the monster truck show
this afternoon.
257
00:11:08,319 --> 00:11:09,756
- What?
- Oh, honey.
258
00:11:09,843 --> 00:11:11,018
You know,
I know how you love
259
00:11:11,105 --> 00:11:12,497
to study every Saturday.
260
00:11:12,584 --> 00:11:13,890
So I figured I'll just
get out of your hair
261
00:11:13,977 --> 00:11:15,936
and let you bury yourself
in your books, huh?
262
00:11:16,023 --> 00:11:17,764
Am I a thoughtful guy or what?
263
00:11:20,201 --> 00:11:21,768
Yeah, you're a real prince.
264
00:11:21,855 --> 00:11:23,683
Hey, uh, what's this?
265
00:11:23,770 --> 00:11:26,120
[imitating Yogi Bear]
Looks like someone's off
to a Jellystone Park
266
00:11:26,207 --> 00:11:28,165
with a pic-a-nic basket.
267
00:11:30,167 --> 00:11:31,473
- Yeah, Dana was--
- Uh, wait!
268
00:11:31,560 --> 00:11:33,997
I was planning to, uh,
study all day
269
00:11:34,084 --> 00:11:36,217
but I was packing a lunch
for the girls
270
00:11:36,304 --> 00:11:38,436
'cause they are going down
to the lake..
271
00:11:38,523 --> 00:11:40,047
...without me, of course.
272
00:11:40,134 --> 00:11:41,831
'Cause I'm just
gonna be here studying
273
00:11:41,918 --> 00:11:43,746
by myself.
274
00:11:43,833 --> 00:11:45,617
Alone with my books.
275
00:11:47,663 --> 00:11:50,753
That's my little brainiac.
I'm gonna miss you.
276
00:11:50,840 --> 00:11:53,800
[imitating Yogi Bear]
Hey, you guys look out
for Mr. Ranger now, okay?
277
00:11:53,887 --> 00:11:55,279
Come on, Yogi.
Alright, Boo-Boo.
278
00:11:55,366 --> 00:11:56,759
Alright, Yogi, come on.
279
00:11:59,675 --> 00:12:00,981
Dana, why didn't you
tell Rich the picnic
280
00:12:01,068 --> 00:12:03,200
was for the two of you?
281
00:12:03,287 --> 00:12:04,811
What for? I mean, it's obvious
282
00:12:04,898 --> 00:12:07,552
he'd rather spend time
with Cassie than with me.
283
00:12:09,206 --> 00:12:11,600
[instrumental music]
284
00:12:15,952 --> 00:12:17,040
Ahh!
285
00:12:27,355 --> 00:12:29,749
I think you're lost, barky,
the fire hydrant's outside.
286
00:12:31,489 --> 00:12:34,318
Look, I don't know
how to say this, but..
287
00:12:34,405 --> 00:12:36,407
...I'm not fun.
288
00:12:36,494 --> 00:12:38,018
I've been telling you
that for years.
289
00:12:39,671 --> 00:12:41,499
J.T., this is serious.
290
00:12:41,586 --> 00:12:43,371
Rich is out
with Cassie right now
291
00:12:43,458 --> 00:12:45,460
because she's fun
and I'm not.
292
00:12:45,547 --> 00:12:47,984
So please, you've gotta teach me
how to be fun.
293
00:12:49,769 --> 00:12:51,901
Let me get this straight.
294
00:12:51,988 --> 00:12:54,730
You, brilliant, perfect Dana
295
00:12:54,817 --> 00:12:56,950
need help from dumb old me?
296
00:12:57,037 --> 00:12:58,473
[sighs]
Yes.
297
00:12:58,560 --> 00:13:00,127
And I want you to know
that this is
298
00:13:00,214 --> 00:13:03,217
the lowest point of my life.
299
00:13:03,304 --> 00:13:05,523
Yes, which of course makes
it the highest point of mine.
300
00:13:07,047 --> 00:13:09,092
So you're gonna teach me
how to be fun?
301
00:13:09,179 --> 00:13:12,617
I'll try. But remember,
I'm just one man.
302
00:13:15,229 --> 00:13:16,404
So what's first?
303
00:13:17,535 --> 00:13:18,798
[burping]
304
00:13:22,758 --> 00:13:24,542
What was that?
305
00:13:24,629 --> 00:13:26,283
That, Dana, was fun.
306
00:13:28,590 --> 00:13:31,375
Listen, I am not going to belch.
307
00:13:31,462 --> 00:13:33,595
Cassie would.
308
00:13:33,682 --> 00:13:36,293
In fact, I hear she can belch
to "Camptown Races"
309
00:13:36,380 --> 00:13:38,382
all the way
to doo-da, doo-da.
310
00:13:39,383 --> 00:13:40,863
That is disgusting.
311
00:13:40,950 --> 00:13:43,518
Fine, then Cassie gets Rich
312
00:13:43,605 --> 00:13:45,563
and you end up the way
we all thought you would.
313
00:13:45,650 --> 00:13:48,871
An angry gym teacher,
short haircut, too many cats.
314
00:13:51,787 --> 00:13:54,398
Alright, fine. I'll try it.
315
00:13:54,485 --> 00:13:57,401
- So, what am I supposed to do?
- It's no big deal.
316
00:13:57,488 --> 00:13:59,447
Just suck in some air
and burp it out.
317
00:14:01,231 --> 00:14:02,537
[inhaling]
318
00:14:03,451 --> 00:14:05,061
[burping]
319
00:14:07,629 --> 00:14:09,109
Alright!
320
00:14:10,371 --> 00:14:13,243
[instrumental music]
321
00:14:16,159 --> 00:14:18,248
Come on, honey, hurry up.
The game's about to start.
322
00:14:18,335 --> 00:14:20,598
I don't wanna miss
the kick-off here.
323
00:14:20,685 --> 00:14:21,991
Can you get this
in the kitchen, hon?
324
00:14:22,078 --> 00:14:23,514
- Sure.
- Okay. Don't hurt yourself.
325
00:14:23,601 --> 00:14:26,517
There you go. Good girl.
326
00:14:26,604 --> 00:14:28,171
Carol, where's the,
uh, remote control?
327
00:14:28,258 --> 00:14:29,956
- On top of the TV.
- Oh.
328
00:14:30,043 --> 00:14:31,914
Carol, where's the TV?
329
00:14:35,265 --> 00:14:36,876
Oh, my God.
330
00:14:36,963 --> 00:14:38,703
Oh, my God. We've been robbed!
331
00:14:38,790 --> 00:14:40,618
No, we've been had.
332
00:14:40,705 --> 00:14:44,057
I knew this would happen.
Bert strikes again.
333
00:14:44,144 --> 00:14:45,580
But that doesn't make sense.
334
00:14:45,667 --> 00:14:48,191
I mean, why would Bert
want our junky old TV?
335
00:14:48,278 --> 00:14:50,411
After giving you $300.
336
00:14:51,716 --> 00:14:52,761
You know why.
337
00:14:53,893 --> 00:14:57,374
Because this $300 is not real.
338
00:14:57,461 --> 00:14:59,594
It's counterfeit,
it's funny money.
339
00:14:59,681 --> 00:15:01,422
- It's sucker bucks and now..
- No!
340
00:15:01,509 --> 00:15:03,119
It's confetti.
341
00:15:03,206 --> 00:15:04,860
Ha-ha.
342
00:15:04,947 --> 00:15:06,688
[knock on door]
343
00:15:06,775 --> 00:15:08,472
Hey, cuz, Carol.
344
00:15:08,559 --> 00:15:10,170
You know, you guys really
should lock your doors.
345
00:15:10,257 --> 00:15:11,432
Someone could just walk right
in and steal somethin'.
346
00:15:11,519 --> 00:15:12,999
Well, you ought to know.
347
00:15:13,086 --> 00:15:14,957
Bert, you have a lot
of nerve comin' back here
348
00:15:15,044 --> 00:15:16,567
after what you did.
349
00:15:16,654 --> 00:15:20,180
Yeah, Bert,
how could you steal our TV?
350
00:15:20,267 --> 00:15:23,096
I invite you over,
I opened my home.
351
00:15:23,183 --> 00:15:26,229
I even gave you meatloaf!
352
00:15:26,316 --> 00:15:28,884
You got it all wrong. Didn't
J.T. give you the message?
353
00:15:28,971 --> 00:15:31,017
Yeah, right.
What are you talkin' about?
354
00:15:31,104 --> 00:15:32,975
That kid is gettin'
more like me everyday.
355
00:15:34,977 --> 00:15:37,240
We gotta hurry up. One more
stop we got to make.
356
00:15:37,327 --> 00:15:38,633
Uh, where do you want this?
357
00:15:38,720 --> 00:15:39,677
Uh, set it right down there
358
00:15:39,764 --> 00:15:40,940
in front of the couch.
359
00:15:45,118 --> 00:15:46,597
[Frank]
Oh, my God!
360
00:15:50,253 --> 00:15:51,820
Bert..
361
00:15:51,907 --> 00:15:53,953
You bought us a new TV?
362
00:15:54,040 --> 00:15:56,172
Feelin' kind of stupid,
huh, Frank?
363
00:15:58,000 --> 00:16:01,482
Oh! Bert, I just
can't believe this.
364
00:16:01,569 --> 00:16:03,875
Believe it. This baby is loaded.
365
00:16:03,963 --> 00:16:07,227
Cable ready, surround sound
picture-in-picture..
366
00:16:07,314 --> 00:16:08,837
Heck, this baby will do
everything except
367
00:16:08,924 --> 00:16:12,145
go to the can for you
during commercials.
368
00:16:12,232 --> 00:16:15,017
Oh, Bert, gee, I'm really
sorry I ever doubted you.
369
00:16:15,104 --> 00:16:18,151
Yeah, Bert, yeah, I-I shouldn't
have jumped to conclusions.
370
00:16:18,238 --> 00:16:20,631
- I apologize.
- Ah, it's alright, Frank.
371
00:16:20,718 --> 00:16:22,372
You had a right.
372
00:16:22,459 --> 00:16:25,288
I did some pretty lousy things
to you over the years.
373
00:16:25,375 --> 00:16:27,290
Let's just say
this is my way of proving to you
374
00:16:27,377 --> 00:16:29,727
that I really
am a different man.
375
00:16:29,814 --> 00:16:32,208
Wow, Carol,
you know what this means?
376
00:16:32,295 --> 00:16:36,343
Yes, that people can change
and turn their lives around.
377
00:16:36,430 --> 00:16:39,041
No. That I just
ripped up $300!
378
00:16:39,128 --> 00:16:40,695
Oh, my God!
379
00:16:40,782 --> 00:16:43,350
[rock music]
380
00:16:46,614 --> 00:16:50,139
Okay, now, I'm gonna
put the nine in the corner
381
00:16:50,226 --> 00:16:52,750
kiss the five, and put it
in the other corner.
382
00:16:52,837 --> 00:16:54,926
The hard way.
383
00:16:55,014 --> 00:16:56,232
♪ Pick up the beat ♪
384
00:16:56,319 --> 00:16:57,842
♪ Pick up the beat ♪
385
00:16:57,929 --> 00:17:00,236
♪ Pick up the beat ♪♪
386
00:17:00,323 --> 00:17:03,196
[cheering and applause]
387
00:17:07,678 --> 00:17:08,853
Uh, let me get this straight.
388
00:17:08,940 --> 00:17:10,899
You've uh, played
this game before, yes?
389
00:17:10,986 --> 00:17:12,640
- Uh-huh.
- Yes.
390
00:17:16,905 --> 00:17:19,386
Yo, Halke, what it is?
391
00:17:20,300 --> 00:17:21,866
[burps]
392
00:17:29,526 --> 00:17:31,920
I'm sorry, have we met?
393
00:17:32,007 --> 00:17:34,096
What's up, girlfriend!
How you livin'?
394
00:17:39,884 --> 00:17:41,321
Dana, what happened
to your clothes?
395
00:17:41,408 --> 00:17:43,845
Looks like you just came out
of a mosh pit.
396
00:17:43,932 --> 00:17:45,673
Check it out.
397
00:17:45,760 --> 00:17:47,283
It's the new me.
398
00:17:47,370 --> 00:17:50,243
I'm dressed
to hang with my homelies.
399
00:17:55,204 --> 00:17:56,553
That would be homies.
400
00:17:58,425 --> 00:18:00,601
Whatever.
401
00:18:00,688 --> 00:18:02,690
So, you mind if I play?
402
00:18:02,777 --> 00:18:04,213
Yeah, I thought you hated pool.
403
00:18:04,300 --> 00:18:05,954
That was the old Dana.
404
00:18:06,041 --> 00:18:07,999
Looks like fun. Rack 'em up.
405
00:18:10,959 --> 00:18:13,527
It's cool, it's cool.
Chill, babies.
406
00:18:14,832 --> 00:18:16,225
Okay.
407
00:18:16,312 --> 00:18:19,446
Sports fans,
watch and be amazed.
408
00:18:19,533 --> 00:18:20,664
Ooh!
409
00:18:25,539 --> 00:18:26,670
Okay.
410
00:18:27,976 --> 00:18:31,371
White ball in that side hole.
411
00:18:35,853 --> 00:18:38,291
[glass shatters]
412
00:18:46,995 --> 00:18:48,649
Honey, what has gotten into you?
413
00:18:48,736 --> 00:18:51,391
Chill, boyfriend,
that was just my warm-up.
414
00:18:51,478 --> 00:18:52,914
Really?
415
00:18:53,001 --> 00:18:54,089
What're you gonna do
for your next short, uh
416
00:18:54,176 --> 00:18:55,525
take out the snack bar?
417
00:18:57,571 --> 00:19:00,661
What's the matter, Cass?
Afraid of a little competition?
418
00:19:04,708 --> 00:19:05,840
[screeching]
419
00:19:05,927 --> 00:19:07,363
[gasping]
420
00:19:07,450 --> 00:19:08,886
Oops!
421
00:19:08,973 --> 00:19:11,237
- Honey!
- Oh! Oh!
422
00:19:11,324 --> 00:19:12,325
- Oh.
- Oh!
423
00:19:12,412 --> 00:19:13,804
What's the matter with you?
424
00:19:17,417 --> 00:19:19,375
Uh, I'm sorry. Oh.
425
00:19:19,462 --> 00:19:20,855
[clattering]
426
00:19:22,857 --> 00:19:24,554
Dana. Dana.
Wait, wait, wait, wait!
427
00:19:24,641 --> 00:19:27,253
Honey, honey!
Honey, where're you going?
428
00:19:27,340 --> 00:19:29,951
What's goin' on?
You're acting crazy.
429
00:19:30,038 --> 00:19:32,954
Well, you don't seem to mind it
when Cassie acts crazy.
430
00:19:34,912 --> 00:19:36,827
Is that what this is all about?
431
00:19:36,914 --> 00:19:38,264
You're jealous of Cassie?
432
00:19:38,351 --> 00:19:40,135
You're damn right
I'm jealous.
433
00:19:40,222 --> 00:19:42,877
You spend every
free minute with her.
434
00:19:42,964 --> 00:19:46,097
I guess, I thought if I could
just be funlike Cassie
435
00:19:46,185 --> 00:19:49,275
then maybe you'd be interested
in spending some time with me.
436
00:19:49,362 --> 00:19:51,059
Honey, I love you.
437
00:19:51,146 --> 00:19:53,366
And love has nothing
to do with fun.
438
00:19:57,761 --> 00:20:00,068
L-let me rephrase that, um..
439
00:20:00,155 --> 00:20:02,244
Uh, when I hang out with Cassie
440
00:20:02,331 --> 00:20:04,246
it's like hangin' out
with a best buddy.
441
00:20:04,333 --> 00:20:05,508
You know, like, when
I hang out with J.T.
442
00:20:05,595 --> 00:20:07,336
except without the body odor.
443
00:20:09,251 --> 00:20:10,774
Really?
444
00:20:10,861 --> 00:20:13,299
Yeah, really, honey..
445
00:20:13,386 --> 00:20:15,214
...you are the only one for me.
446
00:20:15,301 --> 00:20:16,563
Look, I'm sorry
if me hangin' out
447
00:20:16,650 --> 00:20:18,913
with Cassie is making you sad.
448
00:20:19,000 --> 00:20:20,175
She's my friend.
449
00:20:20,262 --> 00:20:21,611
I like her.
450
00:20:22,873 --> 00:20:24,745
But I love you.
451
00:20:24,832 --> 00:20:27,835
Please don't ever change.
452
00:20:27,922 --> 00:20:31,665
Oh, I think,
I just proved that I can't.
453
00:20:31,752 --> 00:20:34,929
Well, then I am one lucky guy.
454
00:20:35,016 --> 00:20:36,365
Come here.
455
00:20:36,452 --> 00:20:38,628
Give your homelie some lovin'.
456
00:20:38,715 --> 00:20:40,717
[instrumental music]
457
00:20:45,287 --> 00:20:47,420
Honey, I thought I explained
this to you before.
458
00:20:47,507 --> 00:20:49,770
I don't care if you don't know
how to play pool.
459
00:20:49,857 --> 00:20:52,033
I've been practicing
and I wanna show you.
460
00:20:52,120 --> 00:20:53,513
Oh, I've seen you play.
461
00:20:53,600 --> 00:20:55,210
Believe me, you're
the only person who can turn
462
00:20:55,297 --> 00:20:57,865
a game of pool
into a brush with death.
463
00:20:57,952 --> 00:20:59,954
What's the matter?
Afraid I'm gonna beat you?
464
00:21:00,041 --> 00:21:04,741
Oh, please.
I am a masterat pool.
465
00:21:04,828 --> 00:21:08,615
I'll tell you what.
Let's make it interesting.
466
00:21:08,702 --> 00:21:12,532
If I win, we don't have sex
until we're married.
467
00:21:12,619 --> 00:21:15,578
If you win, tonight's the night.
468
00:21:17,058 --> 00:21:18,538
Rack 'em up!
469
00:21:18,625 --> 00:21:20,322
My turn now. Get out of here.
470
00:21:24,108 --> 00:21:26,981
[singing in foreign language
471
00:21:47,480 --> 00:21:48,872
Ha-ha-ha.
472
00:21:51,397 --> 00:21:52,354
I win.
473
00:21:53,573 --> 00:21:57,185
No, we both win.
474
00:21:57,272 --> 00:21:59,622
- Bravo!
- I win.
475
00:21:59,709 --> 00:22:01,755
Bravo!
476
00:22:01,842 --> 00:22:03,931
- Bravo!
- I win. I win.
477
00:22:04,018 --> 00:22:06,412
- Bravo!
- I win.
478
00:22:06,499 --> 00:22:12,679
Bravo! Bravo! Bravo!
479
00:22:12,766 --> 00:22:15,769
- Bravo.
- Not another dream, not again.
480
00:22:15,856 --> 00:22:17,901
It can't be another dream.
481
00:22:19,076 --> 00:22:21,165
[screams]
No!
34210
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