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1
00:00:22,690 --> 00:00:24,825
(GIRL LAUGHING)
2
00:00:32,300 --> 00:00:34,468
(WATER SPLASHING)
3
00:00:34,535 --> 00:00:38,639
MOLLIE: Don't get out
of this bathtub.
Julie! Julie!
4
00:00:38,706 --> 00:00:40,741
Julie Christina Ubriacco!
5
00:00:41,942 --> 00:00:45,946
Julie, you're dripping suds
all over the place!
6
00:00:46,013 --> 00:00:48,516
Come over here...
Where are you?
7
00:00:48,582 --> 00:00:50,118
MIKEY: I don't wanna
brush my teeth.
8
00:00:50,184 --> 00:00:52,253
I brushed them
last Saturday.
9
00:00:52,320 --> 00:00:54,722
Mike, I know, but you're
gonna have plants growing
out of your mouth.
10
00:00:54,788 --> 00:00:58,025
MIKEY: That way
we can save
on groceries.
11
00:00:58,092 --> 00:00:59,693
MOLLIE: Under your bed?
12
00:01:01,229 --> 00:01:02,430
(CRASHING)
13
00:01:02,496 --> 00:01:03,831
(CRYING)
14
00:01:05,599 --> 00:01:07,601
What? Honey?
15
00:01:07,668 --> 00:01:09,537
Honey,
are you all right,
sweet...
16
00:01:09,603 --> 00:01:10,604
(GROANS)
17
00:01:10,671 --> 00:01:12,440
(CRYING CONTINUES)
18
00:01:15,876 --> 00:01:18,712
This is why
we don't run around
all wet.
19
00:01:18,779 --> 00:01:21,482
JAMES: Yes! Yes!
MIKEY: No! No!
20
00:01:21,549 --> 00:01:23,851
JAMES: Come on.
MIKEY: I don't wanna
go to bed.
21
00:01:25,919 --> 00:01:29,223
You gotta go to bed.
MIKEY: I went to bed
last night.
22
00:01:29,290 --> 00:01:32,160
How many times a week
do I have to go to bed?
23
00:01:32,226 --> 00:01:35,129
MOLLIE: Once upon
a time there was
a beautiful princess.
24
00:01:35,196 --> 00:01:36,664
She moved to Queens.
The end.
25
00:01:36,730 --> 00:01:38,332
JULIE: That's not a story.
26
00:01:38,399 --> 00:01:40,434
It is tonight.
Good night!
27
00:01:41,835 --> 00:01:44,572
Change partners.
Do-si-do.
28
00:01:44,638 --> 00:01:46,674
MOLLIE: Give me a kiss.
JULIE: Daddy,
tell me a story.
29
00:01:46,740 --> 00:01:48,776
JAMES: Two nuns
walk into a park.
One nun says...
30
00:01:48,842 --> 00:01:50,678
MOLLIE: James!
What?
31
00:01:50,744 --> 00:01:52,446
It's not...
Oh, man!
32
00:01:52,513 --> 00:01:54,815
JULIE: Night light.
MIKEY: Night light.
33
00:01:56,884 --> 00:01:58,619
(GROANS)
Damn! Honey?
34
00:02:02,256 --> 00:02:04,124
Did you leave
that truck
in the hall?
35
00:02:04,192 --> 00:02:06,494
JULIE: Mikey did it.
Good night, Julie.
36
00:02:07,928 --> 00:02:09,830
Mom, wanna play
teacups?
37
00:02:09,897 --> 00:02:12,466
No, I don't wanna
play teacups.
Good night.
38
00:02:12,533 --> 00:02:13,601
JULIE: Good night!
39
00:02:13,667 --> 00:02:15,002
Do I wanna
play teacups?
40
00:02:19,340 --> 00:02:21,875
Oh, man,
am I exhausted.
41
00:02:21,942 --> 00:02:23,076
I know.
42
00:02:23,143 --> 00:02:25,746
I feel like
I can't move.
43
00:02:25,813 --> 00:02:28,549
(SIGHS) Every night
we go through
the same thing.
44
00:02:30,251 --> 00:02:31,419
What?
45
00:02:33,153 --> 00:02:35,155
What?
What is that look?
46
00:02:36,224 --> 00:02:38,726
Are you kidding?
Uh-uh.
47
00:02:38,792 --> 00:02:41,094
You... Honey, no.
They're not even asleep.
48
00:02:41,161 --> 00:02:42,796
They'll be asleep.
49
00:02:42,863 --> 00:02:45,199
No, they won't.
They're probably standing
outside playing teacups.
50
00:02:45,266 --> 00:02:47,435
(GIGGLING)
Oh, come on.
51
00:02:47,501 --> 00:02:49,737
Honey, they're probably
right outside.
52
00:02:50,571 --> 00:02:52,640
Lock the door.
53
00:02:52,706 --> 00:02:54,942
Ooh, Mollie!
54
00:02:55,008 --> 00:02:56,410
Oh, James!
55
00:02:56,477 --> 00:02:57,945
TROOPER: Oh, Princess.
56
00:02:58,011 --> 00:02:59,713
PRINCESS: Oh, Trooper.
57
00:02:59,780 --> 00:03:02,250
Well...
It was a lovely evening.
58
00:03:02,316 --> 00:03:05,986
Was? I take you
to the best dumpster
59
00:03:06,053 --> 00:03:07,988
and all I get is
a lick on the cheek?
60
00:03:08,055 --> 00:03:10,724
Please!
I'm not that kind
of spaniel.
61
00:03:10,791 --> 00:03:13,193
Baby,
you're the cutest thing
on four legs.
62
00:03:13,261 --> 00:03:15,663
I think
you're wonderful, but...
63
00:03:15,729 --> 00:03:17,998
I can't!
64
00:03:18,065 --> 00:03:20,133
Wait, Princess!
65
00:03:20,200 --> 00:03:23,170
Yes?
I didn't want
to tell you this.
66
00:03:23,237 --> 00:03:25,906
I've got an appointment
at the vet tomorrow.
I may not make it.
67
00:03:25,973 --> 00:03:28,742
Oh, Trooper! Really?
68
00:03:29,443 --> 00:03:30,644
Bingo!
69
00:03:30,711 --> 00:03:32,280
* You ain't nothin'
but a hound dog
70
00:03:32,346 --> 00:03:33,414
(CLAMORING)
71
00:03:33,481 --> 00:03:36,083
* Cryin' all the time
72
00:03:36,149 --> 00:03:39,086
* You ain't nothin'
but a hound dog
73
00:03:39,152 --> 00:03:41,955
* Cryin' all the time
74
00:03:42,022 --> 00:03:44,091
* Well, you ain't
never caught a rabbit
75
00:03:44,157 --> 00:03:47,160
* And you ain't
no friend of mine
76
00:03:47,227 --> 00:03:49,997
* Well, they said
you was high classed
77
00:03:50,063 --> 00:03:52,733
* Well, that was just a lie
78
00:03:52,800 --> 00:03:55,469
* Yeah, they said
you was high classed
79
00:03:55,536 --> 00:03:58,372
* Well, that was just a lie
80
00:03:58,439 --> 00:04:00,541
* Well, you ain't
never caught a rabbit
81
00:04:00,608 --> 00:04:03,611
* And you ain't
no friend of mine
82
00:04:03,677 --> 00:04:05,913
* You ain't nothin'
but a hound dog *
83
00:04:05,979 --> 00:04:09,283
Yes! I am the king!
The king of the kennel!
84
00:04:09,350 --> 00:04:10,951
Losers! Losers!
85
00:04:11,018 --> 00:04:12,720
(MOCKING)
86
00:04:12,786 --> 00:04:15,188
Who cares?
She was a dog anyway.
87
00:04:15,255 --> 00:04:16,857
There's another one.
88
00:04:16,924 --> 00:04:19,527
Let's go for it!
Don't tell the guys.
89
00:04:19,593 --> 00:04:21,962
(CLAMORING)
90
00:04:22,029 --> 00:04:25,466
And another one! Oh, boy.
They're all over!
91
00:04:25,533 --> 00:04:27,034
Come to papa!
92
00:04:29,570 --> 00:04:32,440
PRINCESS: What'll the girls
down at the hydrant say?
93
00:04:32,506 --> 00:04:34,542
PUPPY: Hey, Ma,
check it out.
94
00:04:34,608 --> 00:04:37,778
I got these things
on my face to open.
I can see.
95
00:04:37,845 --> 00:04:42,182
I can see...
Wrinkly butts.
Yuck!
96
00:04:42,249 --> 00:04:45,285
They're not mine.
They're your
brothers and sisters.
97
00:04:45,353 --> 00:04:47,187
Good. That makes me
the cute one.
98
00:04:47,254 --> 00:04:48,989
(FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)
Whoa!
99
00:04:52,393 --> 00:04:54,227
So, how did this happen?
100
00:04:54,294 --> 00:04:56,163
How did this happen?
101
00:04:56,229 --> 00:04:59,667
Oh, look!
Here come the three kings!
It must be a miracle!
102
00:05:01,369 --> 00:05:02,670
PUPPY: Who the heck
were they?
103
00:05:02,736 --> 00:05:04,171
They're my masters.
104
00:05:04,237 --> 00:05:05,873
They're hideous.
105
00:05:05,939 --> 00:05:09,810
They're just big dogs
who walk funny.
You take care of them.
106
00:05:09,877 --> 00:05:12,179
I don't want
any stupid masters.
107
00:05:12,245 --> 00:05:14,014
Someday you will.
108
00:05:14,081 --> 00:05:18,552
(SIGHS) I'll never get
my figure back.
It's cycle four for me.
109
00:05:24,257 --> 00:05:25,926
What are you coloring?
110
00:05:30,097 --> 00:05:31,899
Christmas list.
111
00:05:31,965 --> 00:05:34,602
Christmas list
in September?
What is that?
112
00:05:34,668 --> 00:05:38,138
Oh, a dog?
Mikey, we've been through
this a hundred times.
113
00:05:38,205 --> 00:05:40,708
But, Ma,
we need a dog.
114
00:05:40,774 --> 00:05:43,844
Like those guys
who come to sell stuff.
115
00:05:43,911 --> 00:05:45,479
He could chew
their legs off.
116
00:05:45,546 --> 00:05:47,247
That would be nice, but...
117
00:05:47,314 --> 00:05:50,451
And you could save
lots of money
'cause he could baby-sit.
118
00:05:50,518 --> 00:05:52,953
You know
dogs can't baby-sit.
119
00:05:53,020 --> 00:05:55,589
Dogs are smart.
We could teach him stuff.
120
00:05:55,656 --> 00:05:58,659
Yes, we could, like
how to pick up your room.
121
00:05:58,726 --> 00:06:00,260
Cool!
Cool?
122
00:06:00,327 --> 00:06:02,530
Listen. I'll tell you
what I will do.
123
00:06:02,596 --> 00:06:06,099
I promise you
that we will
buy you a dog.
124
00:06:06,166 --> 00:06:08,469
And I know
you'll treat it
really well.
125
00:06:08,536 --> 00:06:10,237
Right now we live
in this teeny apartment
126
00:06:10,303 --> 00:06:11,972
and it wouldn't be
fair to a dog.
127
00:06:12,039 --> 00:06:14,608
What if Santa thinks
it's a good idea?
128
00:06:14,675 --> 00:06:16,309
Why don't we talk
about this after school?
129
00:06:16,376 --> 00:06:18,311
You always say that!
130
00:06:18,378 --> 00:06:19,947
You always bug me.
131
00:06:20,013 --> 00:06:23,216
Bug, bug, bug, bug, bug.
Go bug your teacher.
132
00:06:23,784 --> 00:06:26,454
Julie? Julie?
133
00:06:35,929 --> 00:06:37,898
Snap out of it, honey.
134
00:06:37,965 --> 00:06:40,501
Aren't you bored
with that tape yet?
It's good.
135
00:06:40,568 --> 00:06:45,739
The pass is to Julie.
Up she goes! She scores
a hundred million points.
136
00:06:45,806 --> 00:06:49,309
(CHUCKLING) Most little girls
are obsessed with
ponies and mermaids,
137
00:06:49,376 --> 00:06:51,845
not big sweaty men
making jump shots.
138
00:06:51,912 --> 00:06:54,181
Should we be worried?
Mike!
139
00:06:54,247 --> 00:06:57,818
It's the Suns.
If it were the Mavericks,
I'd be worried.
140
00:06:57,885 --> 00:06:59,687
Let me take
a look at you.
141
00:06:59,753 --> 00:07:01,922
I don't know
about the tie!
142
00:07:01,989 --> 00:07:03,023
What?
143
00:07:03,090 --> 00:07:05,092
Silly.
144
00:07:05,158 --> 00:07:07,561
You haven't seen
the whole effect.
Look at this.
145
00:07:07,628 --> 00:07:09,497
(TIE PLAYING MUSIC)
It does this.
146
00:07:09,563 --> 00:07:11,064
(GIGGLING)
147
00:07:11,131 --> 00:07:12,733
It looks like
it's from Las Vegas.
148
00:07:12,800 --> 00:07:14,635
Are you gonna wear that
on a job interview?
149
00:07:14,702 --> 00:07:16,369
Honey, it's a joke.
I know it's a joke.
150
00:07:16,436 --> 00:07:18,806
No, you didn't.
Yes, I did. I did!
151
00:07:18,872 --> 00:07:20,741
This is the tie
I wanna wear.
152
00:07:21,975 --> 00:07:23,611
That is a joke!
153
00:07:23,677 --> 00:07:25,613
What?
154
00:07:25,679 --> 00:07:28,015
JAMES: They're gonna
know my wife put me
in this suit.
155
00:07:28,081 --> 00:07:29,517
It's the color of poo!
156
00:07:29,583 --> 00:07:32,853
JULIE: Daddy said poo!
157
00:07:32,920 --> 00:07:36,557
Mike? Mike?
What do you think
of this suit?
158
00:07:36,624 --> 00:07:38,091
You look like
my principal.
159
00:07:38,158 --> 00:07:39,727
Even he thinks
it's stupid.
160
00:07:39,793 --> 00:07:41,862
He is not
offering you
a dental plan.
161
00:07:41,929 --> 00:07:44,431
This isn't me.
I wanna be myself.
162
00:07:44,498 --> 00:07:46,433
You're not gonna
get this job
if you're yourself.
163
00:07:46,500 --> 00:07:47,701
(SCOFFS)
164
00:07:47,768 --> 00:07:50,137
I didn't mean it
to sound that way.
165
00:07:50,203 --> 00:07:54,608
A C.E.O. of a corporation
is looking for a certain
demeanor in a corporate pilot.
166
00:07:54,675 --> 00:07:57,811
I just want you to be...
Oh, honey, don't tell them
you still drive the cab.
167
00:07:57,878 --> 00:07:59,513
Oh, come on.
Get out.
Let me drive.
168
00:07:59,580 --> 00:08:01,915
You sit in the back
and act like
you don't know me.
169
00:08:01,982 --> 00:08:04,818
And, honey,
don't tell long stories.
I won't talk.
170
00:08:04,885 --> 00:08:07,487
You can talk,
you can talk. James.
What?
171
00:08:07,555 --> 00:08:09,389
Don't tell jokes.
I'm funny!
172
00:08:09,456 --> 00:08:12,092
You are funny, honey,
in sort of a...
173
00:08:12,159 --> 00:08:13,360
Corny.
174
00:08:13,426 --> 00:08:15,529
Corny, kind of funny.
175
00:08:15,596 --> 00:08:16,730
Bash brothers.
176
00:08:17,330 --> 00:08:18,431
(GRUNTING)
177
00:08:18,498 --> 00:08:19,733
James, look out
for that pud...
178
00:08:19,800 --> 00:08:21,268
(SPLASHING)
179
00:08:24,572 --> 00:08:29,810
I'm sorry about the suit.
My son, he splattered me.
180
00:08:29,877 --> 00:08:32,713
We were doin' this
"Bash Brothers" thing...
181
00:08:32,780 --> 00:08:35,549
It's not spit up
or anything.
182
00:08:36,349 --> 00:08:38,586
It's just mud.
183
00:08:38,652 --> 00:08:42,590
Frankly, Mr. Ubriacco,
you resume is
not very extensive.
184
00:08:42,656 --> 00:08:44,424
I know that.
185
00:08:44,491 --> 00:08:47,961
Yet some of my people
who have flown with you
insist I meet you.
186
00:08:48,028 --> 00:08:49,229
Really?
187
00:08:50,664 --> 00:08:52,833
I'd be interested
to know why.
188
00:08:52,900 --> 00:08:54,434
Well... May I?
189
00:08:57,370 --> 00:09:01,675
Ah... Mr. Martin.
I know why
he recommended me.
190
00:09:01,742 --> 00:09:04,945
All right, well,
we're on this flight.
191
00:09:05,012 --> 00:09:07,480
They're in back
having a party.
192
00:09:07,547 --> 00:09:08,882
They're singing
that English song...
193
00:09:08,949 --> 00:09:10,050
* I'm Henry VIII, I am
194
00:09:10,117 --> 00:09:11,551
You know. You're English.
195
00:09:11,619 --> 00:09:13,320
I get on the microphone
and say
196
00:09:13,386 --> 00:09:16,189
"Second verse
same as the first."
197
00:09:16,256 --> 00:09:17,490
(CHUCKLES)
198
00:09:17,557 --> 00:09:21,261
You had to be there.
199
00:09:21,328 --> 00:09:24,131
Oh, God!
I hope he doesn't
blow it.
200
00:09:24,197 --> 00:09:26,600
When he gets nervous,
he gets completely honest.
201
00:09:26,667 --> 00:09:29,102
That is a major
business liability.
202
00:09:29,837 --> 00:09:31,338
He's gonna be okay.
203
00:09:31,404 --> 00:09:33,206
Oh... I think
he's freezing up.
204
00:09:33,273 --> 00:09:37,144
I've been married
to him long enough.
I have E.S.P. about this.
205
00:09:37,210 --> 00:09:38,812
I said, "What'd you
kill the snail for?"
206
00:09:38,879 --> 00:09:41,314
He said, "That thing's been
following me all day!"
207
00:09:41,381 --> 00:09:43,483
(LAUGHING)
208
00:09:45,786 --> 00:09:47,788
I'm gonna make him
a clam souffle tonight.
209
00:09:47,855 --> 00:09:50,357
If that doesn't
cheer him up,
I don't know what will.
210
00:09:50,423 --> 00:09:52,793
It's not like we can't
live off my paycheck anyway.
211
00:09:52,860 --> 00:09:55,295
We've done it 100 times.
212
00:09:55,362 --> 00:09:58,031
Pink!
Mine's pink today.
That's festive.
213
00:10:09,576 --> 00:10:13,747
I can't believe it.
I always wanted
to fly a falcon.
214
00:10:13,814 --> 00:10:16,549
Honey,
how did you find me?
215
00:10:16,616 --> 00:10:18,518
They told me
you were down here.
216
00:10:18,585 --> 00:10:21,521
Mollie, this is
Samantha D'bonne,
my new boss.
217
00:10:21,588 --> 00:10:22,923
How do you do?
218
00:10:22,990 --> 00:10:25,425
I do just fine,
thank you.
219
00:10:25,492 --> 00:10:29,863
Oh, honey...
Congratulations.
220
00:10:29,930 --> 00:10:32,232
And this is
my son Mike.
SAMANTHA: Hello.
221
00:10:32,299 --> 00:10:35,168
He gets this
sticky mystery stuff
on his hands.
222
00:10:35,235 --> 00:10:37,304
And my daughter Julie.
223
00:10:37,370 --> 00:10:38,405
Hello, Julie!
224
00:10:38,471 --> 00:10:40,240
Knock, knock.
225
00:10:40,307 --> 00:10:42,209
Who's there?
226
00:10:42,275 --> 00:10:43,944
Transsexual.
227
00:10:44,011 --> 00:10:45,412
(STUTTERING)
What's it mean?
228
00:10:45,478 --> 00:10:48,248
It's an airline.
We just got cable TV.
And, you know...
229
00:10:48,315 --> 00:10:50,818
Excuse me.
Oh, man.
230
00:10:53,153 --> 00:10:55,388
You work for Majique.
That's a big corporation.
231
00:10:55,455 --> 00:10:58,058
Miss D'bonne is
the president.
You're the president?
232
00:10:58,125 --> 00:11:00,460
Yes!
You're so young.
233
00:11:00,527 --> 00:11:02,595
Darling, I'm 30
and I'm practically
past it.
234
00:11:02,662 --> 00:11:04,765
Read about her
in Fortune.
235
00:11:04,832 --> 00:11:06,533
You're in Fortune?
236
00:11:06,599 --> 00:11:09,870
Well... Actually
it's two pages.
237
00:11:09,937 --> 00:11:12,505
Hey! Mikey, Mikey!
238
00:11:12,572 --> 00:11:14,742
Mikey, wait a minute.
Hold it, honey!
239
00:11:14,808 --> 00:11:16,543
You're gonna end up in Guam.
Get back here.
240
00:11:16,609 --> 00:11:17,644
I didn't do anything.
241
00:11:17,711 --> 00:11:20,547
Sweetheart...
Oh, God, honey!
242
00:11:22,082 --> 00:11:23,216
They're a full-time job.
243
00:11:23,283 --> 00:11:25,585
Did you get off
early from work today?
244
00:11:25,652 --> 00:11:27,888
Yeah, I did.
Was it an office party?
245
00:11:27,955 --> 00:11:29,857
I wouldn't
call it a party.
246
00:11:29,923 --> 00:11:31,358
They never let you
off early.
What'd you do?
247
00:11:31,424 --> 00:11:32,993
I don't know.
248
00:11:33,060 --> 00:11:35,262
She got V.P.! Excuse me.
Did you get V.P.?
Not exactly.
249
00:11:35,328 --> 00:11:37,364
Oh, this is great!
What a day!
250
00:11:37,430 --> 00:11:39,666
I get a job
and you get...
251
00:11:39,733 --> 00:11:41,501
Let's talk about this
a little later.
252
00:11:41,568 --> 00:11:43,771
Let's talk about it
at home.
Come on!
Give me the good news!
253
00:11:43,837 --> 00:11:45,638
I was fired!
254
00:11:48,041 --> 00:11:50,177
Oh, oh, honey.
255
00:11:52,512 --> 00:11:53,814
What happened?
256
00:11:53,881 --> 00:11:56,483
I think it was
because of these
stupid cutbacks.
257
00:11:56,549 --> 00:11:58,185
I asked if it was
because of my work
258
00:11:58,251 --> 00:12:00,187
and they said
no, my work was great.
259
00:12:00,253 --> 00:12:03,423
They said I was the best.
That's why I was
the most expensive.
260
00:12:03,490 --> 00:12:06,226
Then I said,
"Oh, that's good!
What if I'd been better?
261
00:12:06,293 --> 00:12:08,862
"What would you
have done? Shoot me?"
Oh, honey.
262
00:12:08,929 --> 00:12:11,064
You don't need them.
You're so much better.
263
00:12:11,131 --> 00:12:14,968
Nine years
and they give me
a cactus.
264
00:12:15,035 --> 00:12:16,770
A cactus, honey!
265
00:12:16,837 --> 00:12:20,340
Excuse me.
I couldn't help
overhearing.
266
00:12:20,407 --> 00:12:22,675
Really?
I'm terribly sorry.
267
00:12:22,742 --> 00:12:24,744
Oh, don't be sorry.
This is nothing.
268
00:12:24,812 --> 00:12:28,481
Listen, financially
you don't need to worry
about a thing.
269
00:12:28,548 --> 00:12:31,151
I'm negotiating a merger
with Maxim Conti.
270
00:12:31,218 --> 00:12:35,755
In the next month
we'll be flying to Rome,
Paris, New Zealand.
271
00:12:35,823 --> 00:12:37,891
I'll keep him
as busy as I can.
272
00:12:37,958 --> 00:12:42,029
Oh!
That makes me
feel a lot better.
273
00:12:42,095 --> 00:12:44,331
I'm sure
you'll find
something.
274
00:12:46,533 --> 00:12:49,202
Oh, honey.
It'll be okay.
275
00:12:50,470 --> 00:12:54,007
JULIE: Knock, knock.
MIKEY: Nobody's home.
276
00:12:54,074 --> 00:12:57,310
Knock, knock.
All right.
Who is it?
277
00:12:57,377 --> 00:12:58,946
Buck.
Buck who?
278
00:12:59,012 --> 00:13:01,248
Buck, buck.
I'm a chicken.
279
00:13:01,314 --> 00:13:03,350
Oh, Mom,
can I kill her?
280
00:13:03,416 --> 00:13:04,584
Not before dinner.
281
00:13:04,651 --> 00:13:07,020
MAN: Puppies here.
Knock, knock.
282
00:13:07,087 --> 00:13:09,089
Don't torture
your mother.
283
00:13:17,330 --> 00:13:19,466
Cute.
Hi.
284
00:13:19,532 --> 00:13:23,904
PUPPY 1: What's going on?
Where're they
taking everybody?
285
00:13:23,971 --> 00:13:26,239
PUPPY 2: I'm scared.
I'm gonna pee!
286
00:13:26,306 --> 00:13:28,876
That's my brother.
Put him back.
287
00:13:28,942 --> 00:13:31,444
He's so fuzzy.
288
00:13:31,511 --> 00:13:33,380
Is that Kibble
on your hat?
289
00:13:33,446 --> 00:13:34,948
I like you.
290
00:13:37,417 --> 00:13:39,419
Mommy,
I want this one.
291
00:13:39,486 --> 00:13:40,687
All right.
292
00:13:40,753 --> 00:13:43,390
PUPPY 2: Got any treats?
I'm into treats.
293
00:13:46,459 --> 00:13:49,062
Hmm.
It's just me, huh?
294
00:13:49,997 --> 00:13:52,299
So nobody wants me?
295
00:13:52,365 --> 00:13:54,267
So what's wrong with me?
296
00:13:54,334 --> 00:13:57,370
Okay, I drool
more than some
of the other guys.
297
00:13:57,437 --> 00:14:01,274
And I whine
a little bit, sure.
Who doesn't?
298
00:14:01,341 --> 00:14:04,611
Hi.
You smell good...
Like cookies!
299
00:14:06,479 --> 00:14:10,383
And dirt.
Can I go with you?
I like you. Come on!
300
00:14:10,450 --> 00:14:12,452
MOLLIE: Mikey?
301
00:14:12,519 --> 00:14:14,487
Michael Ubriacco,
get over here.
PUPPY 1: Kid,
you gonna take me?
302
00:14:14,554 --> 00:14:17,424
Please? I'll eat shoelaces.
I'll eat vegetables.
MOLLIE: Mikey!
303
00:14:17,490 --> 00:14:19,226
I'll even eat dog food!
304
00:14:19,292 --> 00:14:22,229
Hey, kid, kid!
Don't go away.
Where are you going?
305
00:14:22,295 --> 00:14:24,497
Hey, where'd you go?
306
00:14:24,564 --> 00:14:27,935
PUPPY 1: Uh-oh, bad smell.
You don't look
like dog people.
307
00:14:28,001 --> 00:14:29,636
You look like snake people.
308
00:14:29,702 --> 00:14:32,805
(WHIMPERS)
Oh, not the neck!
309
00:14:32,872 --> 00:14:35,375
Come on.
I hate that.
He's kind of scrawny.
310
00:14:35,442 --> 00:14:37,810
I coughed up hair balls
better looking than you.
311
00:14:37,877 --> 00:14:40,447
Take him, don't take him.
Just make up your mind.
312
00:14:40,513 --> 00:14:41,814
I'll take him.
313
00:14:41,881 --> 00:14:44,584
Don't let happen to him
what happened to them gerbils.
314
00:14:44,651 --> 00:14:47,054
Why don't I
have a good feeling
about this?
315
00:14:50,557 --> 00:14:53,360
PUPPY:
So here they are,
my new masters.
316
00:14:55,395 --> 00:14:57,364
Not!
317
00:14:57,430 --> 00:14:59,232
Oh!
Swallowed a bug!
318
00:15:00,400 --> 00:15:01,801
(WHIMPERING)
319
00:15:01,868 --> 00:15:05,338
(GROANS) Tuck and roll,
tuck and roll!
320
00:15:05,405 --> 00:15:10,377
Ooh! Big room.
I wonder where
all the walls are.
321
00:15:10,443 --> 00:15:13,947
Who needs masters anyway?
I can take care of myself.
322
00:15:14,014 --> 00:15:17,184
Whoa! What the heck
kind of dog was that?
323
00:15:18,785 --> 00:15:20,787
Maybe I do need a master.
324
00:15:22,789 --> 00:15:25,925
Hey, you, how'd you like
to adopt a cute, little pup?
325
00:15:25,993 --> 00:15:28,228
(CLANKING)
Same to you, pal.
326
00:15:28,295 --> 00:15:31,898
He was too skinny anyway.
Probably didn't have
any good treats.
327
00:15:31,965 --> 00:15:34,934
If I was food,
where would I be?
328
00:15:35,002 --> 00:15:38,371
I'd be in my stomach
because I would've
eaten me already.
329
00:15:38,438 --> 00:15:40,573
Fatter people!
This is good.
330
00:15:40,640 --> 00:15:43,810
There's got to be treats
around fat people.
They always got treats.
331
00:15:43,876 --> 00:15:46,446
Oh, doggie dish at 12:00.
I'm coming in.
332
00:15:46,513 --> 00:15:48,381
What's this?
Metal food? Yuck.
333
00:15:48,448 --> 00:15:52,119
Hey, there, little fella.
You hungry?
334
00:15:52,185 --> 00:15:55,322
PUPPY: Are you kidding?
I just ate a nickel.
335
00:15:55,388 --> 00:15:58,158
Oh, yeah, what a guy.
What do you got, food?
336
00:15:58,225 --> 00:16:01,628
You going for food?
Let me see what's in there.
337
00:16:01,694 --> 00:16:04,364
Get your hand away.
I'll do it. I got it.
338
00:16:13,906 --> 00:16:19,746
CHILD: I would like
a Ferrari Testarossa,
alien autopsy,
339
00:16:19,812 --> 00:16:22,015
a super-squirt phlegm gun
with laser sight,
340
00:16:22,082 --> 00:16:25,818
a helicopter,
a spacesuit...
Hmm.
341
00:16:25,885 --> 00:16:29,089
Gee, that goob's been
up there for an hour!
Get him off.
342
00:16:29,156 --> 00:16:32,525
Like I told you,
Santa doesn't want you
to be a naughty girl.
343
00:16:32,592 --> 00:16:34,594
Who are you?
His mother?
344
00:16:34,661 --> 00:16:37,830
No. I'm a Vulcan.
345
00:16:37,897 --> 00:16:41,134
How would you like
a little death grip?
Yeah, right!
346
00:16:41,201 --> 00:16:44,071
A million dollars,
a toy store...
347
00:16:44,137 --> 00:16:45,872
MIKEY: Mom!
JULIE: Mommy! Mommy!
348
00:16:49,176 --> 00:16:52,712
See, I told you
Mommy had a big,
important job with Santa.
349
00:16:52,779 --> 00:16:55,282
Hey, no cuts!
Hey, spot.
Tricked ya.
350
00:17:02,422 --> 00:17:06,993
Ho, ho, ho, ho!
Hello there, everyone.
351
00:17:10,763 --> 00:17:14,301
Merry Christmas,
boys and girls!
352
00:17:15,468 --> 00:17:17,504
Ho, ho, ho, ho!
353
00:17:22,642 --> 00:17:25,044
You look hot.
(IMITATES SIZZLING)
Yeah.
354
00:17:25,112 --> 00:17:26,179
How's it going?
355
00:17:26,246 --> 00:17:28,047
It's going bad.
I hate children.
356
00:17:28,115 --> 00:17:30,250
I used to love children,
now I hate children.
357
00:17:30,317 --> 00:17:33,520
This music's driving me nuts.
I want to hurt Bing Crosby.
Stop it.
358
00:17:33,586 --> 00:17:35,522
Something's gonna come
for you, I know it.
359
00:17:35,588 --> 00:17:38,091
(SIGHS) I have had
40 interviews and nobody
has hired me.
360
00:17:38,158 --> 00:17:40,026
It can only get better.
361
00:17:40,093 --> 00:17:42,762
Maybe next year I can
be one of the reindeer.
Look at the perks!
362
00:17:42,829 --> 00:17:46,065
Hey, guys...
What're you
standing there for?
363
00:17:46,133 --> 00:17:49,736
Mama's personal best friend,
Santa is ready to see you.
364
00:17:49,802 --> 00:17:53,173
Come on.
There you go. Hey.
365
00:17:53,240 --> 00:17:55,308
There you go.
366
00:17:55,375 --> 00:17:58,645
Ho, ho, ho, ho.
Merry Christmas.
367
00:17:59,746 --> 00:18:02,982
Well, how are you today?
368
00:18:03,049 --> 00:18:05,485
(MOUTHING)
Mikey?
369
00:18:05,552 --> 00:18:07,754
You know me?
Ho, ho, ho, ho.
370
00:18:07,820 --> 00:18:11,258
What would you like
Santa to bring you
this Christmas?
371
00:18:12,492 --> 00:18:14,694
I want a dog.
A dog?
372
00:18:14,761 --> 00:18:16,563
That seems that...
373
00:18:16,629 --> 00:18:18,265
(MOUTHING)
374
00:18:18,331 --> 00:18:23,470
You see, Mikey,
even Santa doesn't
control some things.
375
00:18:23,536 --> 00:18:27,507
Somewhere is the absolute
perfect dog for you.
376
00:18:27,574 --> 00:18:30,843
Maybe he's already
been born,
maybe he hasn't.
377
00:18:30,910 --> 00:18:36,048
But when he is,
believe me I'll know
and you'll get him!
378
00:18:36,115 --> 00:18:37,684
So I'll get him
for Christmas?
379
00:18:37,750 --> 00:18:39,319
I'll do my very best.
380
00:18:39,386 --> 00:18:41,921
Thanks, Santa.
You're welcome, Mikey.
381
00:18:45,258 --> 00:18:46,793
There's Santa!
382
00:18:48,628 --> 00:18:50,397
Hello, honey.
383
00:18:50,463 --> 00:18:53,600
(CRYING) Mommy!
384
00:19:01,508 --> 00:19:02,975
Santa is not mad at you.
385
00:19:03,042 --> 00:19:04,744
Now listen,
listen to teddy.
386
00:19:04,811 --> 00:19:05,978
Is Santa mad at Julie?
387
00:19:06,045 --> 00:19:07,347
(SQUEAKING) No.
388
00:19:07,414 --> 00:19:10,283
Will Julie
still get presents?
Yes.
389
00:19:10,350 --> 00:19:12,785
Give me kisses.
Give me kisses, kisses.
390
00:19:14,921 --> 00:19:18,191
JAMES: Julie, cheer up.
How about a
pre-Christmas present?
391
00:19:34,106 --> 00:19:36,209
Get Bernie.
392
00:19:36,276 --> 00:19:41,281
Gotta get these shoes off.
My toes are curling.
393
00:19:41,348 --> 00:19:42,915
Good night, Prancer.
Good night, Dancer.
394
00:19:42,982 --> 00:19:44,217
Good night.
395
00:19:46,686 --> 00:19:49,756
SANTA: No, no, no.
I said to place, not to win.
396
00:19:49,822 --> 00:19:52,425
What's the matter?
Got a plate in your head?
397
00:19:52,492 --> 00:19:54,727
You don't know
how to write?
398
00:19:54,794 --> 00:19:58,331
Oh, you gonna send
some monkey
to bust my knees?
399
00:19:58,398 --> 00:20:01,768
Whoa! Hey, hey, hey.
All right, all right!
400
00:20:01,834 --> 00:20:04,371
Yeah, I'll come up
with a couple of bills.
401
00:20:04,437 --> 00:20:08,174
Hey, I was just
kidding, okay?
Yeah, yeah.
402
00:20:08,241 --> 00:20:10,410
And a merry to you too.
403
00:20:11,478 --> 00:20:13,313
Miserable sack of...
404
00:20:14,914 --> 00:20:16,449
Gee!
405
00:20:16,516 --> 00:20:18,785
You're a fake!
406
00:20:18,851 --> 00:20:20,287
JAMES: How could you
let him see that?
407
00:20:20,353 --> 00:20:21,754
MOLLIE: You were supposed
to be watching him.
408
00:20:21,821 --> 00:20:23,423
I was calming down Julie.
409
00:20:23,490 --> 00:20:25,258
What did Mikey see?
410
00:20:25,325 --> 00:20:26,593
He didn't see anything.
411
00:20:26,659 --> 00:20:28,995
You said he was real.
I know. You see it...
412
00:20:29,061 --> 00:20:30,997
The real Santa's
at the North Pole
and very busy.
413
00:20:31,063 --> 00:20:32,565
He sends out...
Cousins.
Cousins.
414
00:20:32,632 --> 00:20:36,002
That was Santa Claus'
cousin, Sidney Claus.
415
00:20:36,068 --> 00:20:38,505
JAMES: He's Jewish.
He's his Jewish cousin.
416
00:20:38,571 --> 00:20:40,573
MIKEY: But you said
he was real!
417
00:20:50,082 --> 00:20:51,318
(DOOR OPENING)
418
00:20:55,922 --> 00:20:56,923
(CHRISTMAS MUSIC PLAYING)
419
00:20:58,625 --> 00:21:01,193
All right, you chipmunks,
ready to sing your song.
420
00:21:01,260 --> 00:21:03,830
I'll say we are.
Yeah, let's sing it now.
421
00:21:03,896 --> 00:21:05,665
Okay, Simon.
Okay.
422
00:21:05,732 --> 00:21:07,867
Okay, Theodore.
Okay.
423
00:21:07,934 --> 00:21:10,136
Okay, Alvin.
424
00:21:10,202 --> 00:21:12,405
Alvin.
425
00:21:12,472 --> 00:21:14,774
Alvin!
Okay!
426
00:21:14,841 --> 00:21:19,779
* Christmas,
Christmas time is near
427
00:21:19,846 --> 00:21:24,551
* Time for toys
and time for cheer
428
00:21:24,617 --> 00:21:29,489
* We've been good
but we can't last
429
00:21:29,556 --> 00:21:34,026
* Hurry Christmas, hurry fast
430
00:21:34,093 --> 00:21:38,865
* Want a plane
that loops the loop
431
00:21:38,931 --> 00:21:43,670
* Me, I want a hula hoop
432
00:21:43,736 --> 00:21:48,040
* We can hardly stand the wait
433
00:21:48,107 --> 00:21:52,044
* Please Christmas,
don't be late *
434
00:21:54,046 --> 00:21:56,383
Oh, Mikey, Mikey.
435
00:21:56,449 --> 00:21:59,552
What do you want?
You wanna a pizza pie?
436
00:21:59,619 --> 00:22:01,821
Oh, great,
the cornball family!
437
00:22:02,689 --> 00:22:04,156
It didn't work.
438
00:22:08,160 --> 00:22:09,629
(MUSIC STOPS)
439
00:22:11,464 --> 00:22:13,165
You used to
love that song.
440
00:22:13,232 --> 00:22:15,735
What can we do to
make you feel better?
441
00:22:15,802 --> 00:22:18,170
Just tell me the truth.
442
00:22:18,237 --> 00:22:20,373
There is no Santa,
is there?
443
00:22:23,142 --> 00:22:25,545
Yes, there is, honey.
444
00:22:25,612 --> 00:22:27,980
(STAMMERING)
But you know what it's like.
I'll tell you what it's like.
445
00:22:28,047 --> 00:22:31,384
You know how in cub scouts
you have den mothers?
446
00:22:31,451 --> 00:22:35,488
Well, Santa has den Santas.
All right...
447
00:22:35,555 --> 00:22:38,057
Mike, look,
you wanna know
the truth, right?
448
00:22:38,124 --> 00:22:40,393
You don't want us
to lie to you.
449
00:22:40,460 --> 00:22:42,962
And this is the truth.
450
00:22:43,029 --> 00:22:47,434
Um... You know
the whole thing about
the North Pole?
451
00:22:48,501 --> 00:22:50,537
Well, it's just a story.
452
00:22:50,603 --> 00:22:52,439
It's just a story.
453
00:22:52,505 --> 00:22:56,108
Santa is...
Santa is really...
454
00:22:56,175 --> 00:22:57,477
From Finland.
455
00:22:57,977 --> 00:22:59,211
Finland.
456
00:23:00,813 --> 00:23:02,148
Give me a break.
457
00:23:02,214 --> 00:23:03,550
No, he is.
458
00:23:03,616 --> 00:23:06,519
How could some
old guy get around
the world in one night?
459
00:23:06,586 --> 00:23:08,054
Finland Airlines.
That's correct.
460
00:23:08,120 --> 00:23:10,690
And... How could
reindeer fly?
461
00:23:10,757 --> 00:23:11,858
Freight.
462
00:23:11,924 --> 00:23:14,527
And... How come
Rudolph's nose glows?
463
00:23:14,594 --> 00:23:16,696
What is he, radioactive?
464
00:23:16,763 --> 00:23:20,199
How come your
grandfather's nose glows?
Honey...
465
00:23:20,266 --> 00:23:22,702
I have the answer
to this question.
466
00:23:24,370 --> 00:23:27,139
Mikey, some things
in life are magic.
467
00:23:27,206 --> 00:23:28,741
Santa is magic.
468
00:23:31,444 --> 00:23:33,412
Magic's for babies.
469
00:23:37,216 --> 00:23:38,985
Oh, honey, nice try.
470
00:23:58,771 --> 00:24:01,508
(CHEERING ON TELEVISION)
471
00:24:11,217 --> 00:24:13,119
(BALL BOUNCING)
472
00:24:20,893 --> 00:24:23,429
Can I play?
With me?
473
00:24:23,496 --> 00:24:25,865
Let's get busy!
474
00:24:39,078 --> 00:24:40,179
Huh?
475
00:24:51,791 --> 00:24:52,925
(GRUNTS)
476
00:24:52,992 --> 00:24:54,794
(CHEERING)
477
00:25:08,374 --> 00:25:11,410
New York center.
New York center.
478
00:25:11,477 --> 00:25:14,581
Fox Juliet,
flight level 410.
Roger.
479
00:25:14,647 --> 00:25:16,248
Knock, knock.
Hi.
480
00:25:23,656 --> 00:25:25,858
How's the meeting?
Hmm? Oh!
481
00:25:25,925 --> 00:25:28,995
Making threats.
Pretty much business
as usual.
482
00:25:29,061 --> 00:25:31,063
058. Roger.
483
00:25:31,130 --> 00:25:33,966
James, I'm afraid
we're gonna have to work
through this weekend.
484
00:25:34,033 --> 00:25:36,035
Do you mind staying
in Boston a couple of days?
485
00:25:36,502 --> 00:25:38,004
No.
486
00:25:38,070 --> 00:25:41,107
I'll make it up to you.
Buy you dinner.
You don't have to.
487
00:25:41,173 --> 00:25:44,443
That's my job.
So you're gonna
keep me feeling guilty?
488
00:25:44,510 --> 00:25:46,545
Okay, but nothing fancy.
489
00:25:46,613 --> 00:25:48,615
Just a paper napkin place.
490
00:25:48,681 --> 00:25:52,218
Okay. Just don't sound
too thrilled about it,
will you?
491
00:25:53,786 --> 00:25:55,722
It's not that, it's...
492
00:25:56,856 --> 00:26:00,026
I... I was just thinking
about Mikey.
493
00:26:00,092 --> 00:26:02,028
He's upset.
Why?
494
00:26:03,596 --> 00:26:06,899
Well, Mollie's gonna
hate me for this,
but I...
495
00:26:06,966 --> 00:26:09,135
I think we're looking
at the "D" word.
496
00:26:09,201 --> 00:26:10,469
Divorce?
497
00:26:11,570 --> 00:26:13,673
(CHUCKLING) No, no!
498
00:26:13,740 --> 00:26:16,508
Dog!
Oh, dog.
499
00:26:17,910 --> 00:26:19,612
(CAT SCREECHES)
500
00:26:19,679 --> 00:26:22,348
Watch it, pussy,
I'm walking here.
Geez, cats!
501
00:26:22,414 --> 00:26:26,218
Can't live with them,
can't eat them.
They're ruining this city.
502
00:26:26,285 --> 00:26:28,721
Ooh, look at those!
Extra crunchy.
503
00:26:28,788 --> 00:26:30,990
Wrap them up, buddy,
I'll take them to go.
504
00:26:31,057 --> 00:26:34,426
(WOMAN GASPS)
Step on me, lady,
you get a nose in the crotch.
505
00:26:36,262 --> 00:26:37,997
Hey, pal,
how you doing?
506
00:26:38,064 --> 00:26:40,432
This was just sitting
on a park bench,
507
00:26:40,499 --> 00:26:41,768
next to some guy
who was eating it.
508
00:26:41,834 --> 00:26:43,736
(LAUGHING)
Catch you later.
509
00:26:43,803 --> 00:26:47,206
I got a date
with a Pekingese
on Park Avenue.
510
00:26:47,273 --> 00:26:50,209
Face like a Mack truck
but what a body! Whoa!
511
00:26:50,276 --> 00:26:51,911
What can I say?
I'm a hound!
512
00:26:51,978 --> 00:26:53,145
(GRUNTS)
513
00:26:53,212 --> 00:26:56,015
Gotcha!
Come on now, boy.
No trouble.
514
00:26:56,082 --> 00:26:59,218
DOG: Okay, look.
I didn't mean
to steal that Frisbee.
515
00:26:59,285 --> 00:27:01,688
I thought it was
two calzones
mating in midair.
516
00:27:01,754 --> 00:27:04,390
Hey, lousy dog cop!
517
00:27:04,456 --> 00:27:05,658
Hey!
518
00:27:06,558 --> 00:27:08,160
Hey, liver!
519
00:27:08,227 --> 00:27:11,463
Cheese!
I could get
used to this.
520
00:27:11,530 --> 00:27:15,634
You got liver?
Hey, fellas,
spot here got liver.
521
00:27:15,702 --> 00:27:18,570
DOG 1: He got liver?
DOG 2: That's a shame.
522
00:27:18,637 --> 00:27:20,172
That's a crock, man.
523
00:27:20,239 --> 00:27:22,074
What's wrong with liver?
524
00:27:22,141 --> 00:27:23,843
That's your last meal, amigo.
525
00:27:23,910 --> 00:27:25,577
Then it's a big nap for you.
526
00:27:25,644 --> 00:27:27,146
What did I do?
527
00:27:27,213 --> 00:27:28,881
Hey, what did any of us do?
528
00:27:28,948 --> 00:27:30,382
I bit a cop.
529
00:27:30,449 --> 00:27:31,851
Oh, man, I got to talk
to somebody around here.
530
00:27:32,651 --> 00:27:35,287
Too late.
Here comes Dave.
531
00:27:42,061 --> 00:27:44,731
(DOGS BARKING)
532
00:27:44,797 --> 00:27:47,767
Hey, come on!
Can't we work out
some kind of deal?
533
00:27:47,834 --> 00:27:50,369
I got bones buried.
Please, I'll share them!
534
00:27:50,436 --> 00:27:54,841
PIT BULL: Hey, Dave!
You big dumb clod!
535
00:27:54,907 --> 00:27:58,778
DOG 1: He doesn't even
pee right.
PIT BULL: Dave, can I take
a dump in your hat?
536
00:27:58,845 --> 00:28:00,246
CHIHUAHUA: Pendejo!
537
00:28:00,312 --> 00:28:02,681
DAVE: Sorry, fella,
it's time to go.
538
00:28:02,749 --> 00:28:04,751
Don't let him
see your fear, laddie.
539
00:28:04,817 --> 00:28:07,219
Don't give
the hairless bastard
the satisfaction.
540
00:28:07,286 --> 00:28:09,321
Kill Dave!
Kill Dave!
541
00:28:09,388 --> 00:28:11,991
(DOGS BARKING)
542
00:28:12,058 --> 00:28:13,425
Kill Dave!
543
00:28:14,093 --> 00:28:15,895
Kill Dave!
544
00:28:15,962 --> 00:28:17,396
MIKEY: What are we
doing here?
545
00:28:17,463 --> 00:28:18,998
We're going
underwear shopping.
546
00:28:19,065 --> 00:28:21,200
I don't like underwear.
You love underwear.
547
00:28:21,267 --> 00:28:24,103
I hate them.
You love them.
548
00:28:24,170 --> 00:28:26,939
DOG 1: Look alive, guys,
we got masters!
549
00:28:29,508 --> 00:28:30,777
Go ahead.
550
00:28:35,214 --> 00:28:37,750
Pick me, I've been neutered.
I've humped my last leg.
551
00:28:37,817 --> 00:28:40,619
I will follow orders!
552
00:28:40,686 --> 00:28:45,391
I can help you meet chicks.
I've got this lassie thing
down, you know.
553
00:28:45,457 --> 00:28:48,394
You can call me Spot
or Measles.
Please call me Measles.
554
00:28:48,460 --> 00:28:49,695
DOG 1: Hey, kid!
555
00:28:51,831 --> 00:28:53,800
DOG 2: I do everything.
Tricks, roll over.
556
00:28:53,866 --> 00:28:55,467
How about this guy?
Come here.
557
00:28:55,534 --> 00:28:57,569
No, not a boy.
I hate boys.
558
00:28:57,636 --> 00:29:00,072
He looks pretty cool, huh?
559
00:29:00,139 --> 00:29:02,074
I don't know.
He looks like
a hot dog with ears.
560
00:29:02,141 --> 00:29:03,475
I resent that.
561
00:29:04,576 --> 00:29:06,578
Okay, okay,
here's the thing.
562
00:29:06,645 --> 00:29:09,715
I got puppies out there.
Well, maybe I got puppies.
I don't know.
563
00:29:09,782 --> 00:29:13,219
I've been around.
Come on, Dave,
give me a break.
564
00:29:13,285 --> 00:29:15,521
Look, I promise
I'll go straight.
565
00:29:15,587 --> 00:29:18,624
I'll help some blind guy
with a pencil cup!
566
00:29:18,690 --> 00:29:22,394
(SNIFFING) Hey!
I know that smell.
Cookies and dirt!
567
00:29:22,461 --> 00:29:25,064
Cookies and dirt.
Where do I...
Hey, that's my kid!
568
00:29:25,131 --> 00:29:27,366
DAVE: I said,
let's move it.
Move on this!
569
00:29:27,433 --> 00:29:28,700
(GROANS)
570
00:29:28,767 --> 00:29:31,070
Kid, kid,
you know me,
don't you?
571
00:29:31,137 --> 00:29:34,073
Brown, squirmy thing
in a box.
Get me out of here!
572
00:29:34,874 --> 00:29:36,642
Daddy, I want him.
573
00:29:36,708 --> 00:29:39,111
Thank you, thank you,
thank you.
574
00:29:41,713 --> 00:29:44,450
You want him, huh?
Uh-huh.
575
00:29:44,516 --> 00:29:46,986
Here you go.
We'll take him.
576
00:29:47,053 --> 00:29:50,256
Uh-uh.
This one's scheduled
to be destroyed.
577
00:29:50,322 --> 00:29:53,659
What? No way!
Take me, I'm yours!
578
00:29:53,725 --> 00:29:56,863
(CHUCKLES) Well,
he's been reprieved.
Yes!
579
00:29:58,865 --> 00:30:00,399
Okay, here we go.
580
00:30:03,302 --> 00:30:04,670
JAMES: What are you
gonna name him, Mike?
581
00:30:04,736 --> 00:30:06,772
Rocks.
Rocks?
582
00:30:06,839 --> 00:30:08,040
How come Rocks?
583
00:30:08,107 --> 00:30:10,376
'Cause that's what he left
all over the backseat.
584
00:30:10,442 --> 00:30:11,911
ROCKS: Sorry about that.
585
00:30:11,978 --> 00:30:13,479
Oh, man!
586
00:30:15,647 --> 00:30:17,917
Here we are, Rocks.
This is where we live.
587
00:30:17,984 --> 00:30:20,652
Hmm, warm, dry,
no puddles.
588
00:30:20,719 --> 00:30:23,655
Wait a minute.
Nice, cushy thing
to sleep on.
589
00:30:23,722 --> 00:30:27,126
Little lumpy.
Maybe I'll dig the crap
out of the middle.
590
00:30:27,193 --> 00:30:29,095
MOLLIE: Honey,
is that you?
Yep.
591
00:30:33,432 --> 00:30:35,034
Hi.
592
00:30:36,235 --> 00:30:37,536
Hello, James.
593
00:30:37,603 --> 00:30:39,771
What...
What's going on?
594
00:30:39,838 --> 00:30:43,209
Well, Samantha
has brought us
a big surprise.
595
00:30:43,275 --> 00:30:45,211
Really for Mikey
and Julie.
596
00:30:45,945 --> 00:30:47,046
(BLOWS DOG WHISTLE)
597
00:30:47,113 --> 00:30:49,148
(FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)
598
00:30:49,215 --> 00:30:53,219
Eeew! What a tiny kennel.
I've seen enough.
Bring the car around.
599
00:30:54,954 --> 00:30:57,089
Her name is Daphne.
She's purebred.
600
00:30:57,156 --> 00:31:00,059
She was trained
at the Radcliffe
of obedience schools.
601
00:31:00,792 --> 00:31:02,294
Radcliffe. Wow.
602
00:31:03,562 --> 00:31:05,264
Daphne, sit.
603
00:31:06,132 --> 00:31:07,266
Voila!
604
00:31:07,333 --> 00:31:08,767
Aerobics.
605
00:31:08,834 --> 00:31:10,769
But where's my
personal trainer?
606
00:31:13,772 --> 00:31:17,043
Um...
Isn't she a wonderful dog?
607
00:31:17,109 --> 00:31:19,811
I'll have
my manicure now,
please.
608
00:31:19,878 --> 00:31:22,314
I like Rocks bet...
A dog!
609
00:31:22,381 --> 00:31:26,518
Oh, Mikey, wow!
Finally a dog!
610
00:31:26,585 --> 00:31:28,820
Play with
your Rocks later.
Okay.
611
00:31:28,887 --> 00:31:31,657
Ah, honey,
as I was just saying
to Samantha,
612
00:31:31,723 --> 00:31:35,995
we wouldn't dream of
taking her precious baby
away from her.
613
00:31:36,062 --> 00:31:38,430
And as I was
telling Mollie,
614
00:31:38,497 --> 00:31:40,366
we're traveling so much
at the moment,
615
00:31:40,432 --> 00:31:42,768
my poor baby
just doesn't get
enough attention.
616
00:31:42,834 --> 00:31:44,703
Honey, I think
it's a great idea.
617
00:31:44,770 --> 00:31:45,871
Fine! Good.
618
00:31:48,707 --> 00:31:50,742
Radcliffe, honey.
Radcliffe.
619
00:31:53,879 --> 00:31:56,315
Bye-bye, sweetheart.
620
00:31:56,382 --> 00:31:59,585
DAPHNE: Bye-bye?
You can't leave me
with these people.
621
00:31:59,651 --> 00:32:03,255
They haven't been
properly trained
or groomed.
622
00:32:03,322 --> 00:32:05,624
Oh, I'm getting
a migraine.
623
00:32:05,691 --> 00:32:07,359
Good-bye, Mollie.
624
00:32:08,860 --> 00:32:11,430
I'll be sending over
her things.
625
00:32:11,497 --> 00:32:14,066
See you later, James.
Thank you.
Bye-bye, Samantha.
626
00:32:14,133 --> 00:32:16,668
Things? Honey,
a dog has things?
627
00:32:16,735 --> 00:32:18,604
She's just being nice.
628
00:32:18,670 --> 00:32:21,340
The nerve of her
coming here treating us
like a kennel.
629
00:32:21,407 --> 00:32:24,676
She dumps this dog
on this family without
even consulting me!
630
00:32:26,278 --> 00:32:29,915
Look what we got, Mom.
His name's Rocks!
631
00:32:32,051 --> 00:32:35,154
Den! Don't you think
about moving
on me, pal!
632
00:32:38,357 --> 00:32:40,426
Honey, we already
talked about this.
633
00:32:40,492 --> 00:32:44,396
Yes, we talked about it,
but we didn't decide!
Now we have two dogs!
634
00:32:44,463 --> 00:32:46,798
If I take Rocks back,
he'll be put to sleep.
635
00:32:46,865 --> 00:32:49,201
Okay then take...
What is her name?
Daphne.
636
00:32:49,268 --> 00:32:51,303
Take Daphne
back to Princess Di.
637
00:32:51,370 --> 00:32:53,839
I can't insult Samantha.
638
00:32:53,905 --> 00:32:56,108
This is the best job
I have ever had.
639
00:32:56,175 --> 00:32:57,709
This is your responsibility.
640
00:32:57,776 --> 00:33:00,446
You brought both these dogs,
so you fix it...
641
00:33:00,512 --> 00:33:02,848
Or I will fix you!
642
00:33:02,914 --> 00:33:03,949
(SIGHS)
643
00:33:05,384 --> 00:33:06,718
All right.
644
00:33:06,785 --> 00:33:09,255
This is my chair.
This is my cup.
645
00:33:09,321 --> 00:33:11,957
And this is my
stinky brother Mikey.
646
00:33:12,691 --> 00:33:14,326
ROCKS: Sch-wingg!
647
00:33:14,393 --> 00:33:18,197
Hello, baby!
Oh, my!
648
00:33:18,264 --> 00:33:19,965
ROCKS: What a set
of paws!
649
00:33:20,032 --> 00:33:23,369
Hey, powder puff, how about
you and me nosing through
the garbage together?
650
00:33:23,435 --> 00:33:25,237
What cat dragged you in?
651
00:33:25,304 --> 00:33:27,306
Kid just sprung me
from the joint.
652
00:33:27,373 --> 00:33:30,276
I don't associate
with mutts.
I've got papers.
653
00:33:30,342 --> 00:33:31,543
I've been hit by those.
654
00:33:31,610 --> 00:33:33,745
Hurts like hell
when they roll them up,
huh, Daffy?
655
00:33:33,812 --> 00:33:36,815
It's Daphne,
you tick magnet!
656
00:33:36,882 --> 00:33:39,118
Geez!
Like you never
sniffed a butt.
657
00:33:39,185 --> 00:33:42,121
Look, why don't we
just keep them
both for now?
658
00:33:42,188 --> 00:33:43,855
The one that
works out stays,
659
00:33:43,922 --> 00:33:46,992
the one that doesn't
we find another home for.
660
00:33:47,059 --> 00:33:49,428
I don't know.
Come on, honey.
661
00:33:49,495 --> 00:33:51,263
Look how happy
it makes them.
662
00:33:51,330 --> 00:33:55,334
Wasn't there ever anything
in the world that you wanted
more than anything?
663
00:33:58,237 --> 00:33:59,771
I'll never
have breasts!
664
00:33:59,838 --> 00:34:01,006
Oh, honey!
665
00:34:04,176 --> 00:34:08,380
Okay.
But the one we choose
not to keep, goes.
666
00:34:08,447 --> 00:34:10,048
Goes. Goes!
Goes.
667
00:34:10,116 --> 00:34:11,683
Swear.
668
00:34:11,750 --> 00:34:14,886
I got you, baby.
I don't want you
to love me yet.
669
00:34:14,953 --> 00:34:18,890
No, I'm telling you.
You're not
in the clear, buddy.
670
00:34:18,957 --> 00:34:22,027
Oh.
Look, they like
each other.
671
00:34:22,094 --> 00:34:24,430
Mongrel!
Bitch!
672
00:34:24,496 --> 00:34:26,298
Look, honey,
they like each other.
673
00:34:26,365 --> 00:34:27,466
(DOORBELL RINGS)
674
00:34:56,595 --> 00:34:59,265
I don't need a bath.
I just licked down there.
675
00:34:59,331 --> 00:35:02,201
Trust me on this.
I smell worse wet
than I do dry.
676
00:35:02,268 --> 00:35:03,602
ROCKS: Cut it out.
I'm warning you!
677
00:35:03,669 --> 00:35:05,604
JAMES: Mike, quick,
grab him.
678
00:35:10,509 --> 00:35:12,811
What? No bubbles?
679
00:35:12,878 --> 00:35:15,581
And I see
there's no
slice of lemon.
680
00:35:15,647 --> 00:35:16,682
Drink it.
681
00:35:16,748 --> 00:35:18,016
Take it away!
682
00:35:18,083 --> 00:35:19,985
I don't know
why they put
my dish up so high,
683
00:35:20,051 --> 00:35:22,388
but they do serve
a good platter
around here.
684
00:35:22,454 --> 00:35:25,724
Look at this cut of meat!
Mmm-mmm! Uh-oh!
685
00:35:25,791 --> 00:35:27,826
ROCKS: Gonna play
chase the meat, huh?
686
00:35:27,893 --> 00:35:30,329
I love it,
eating and running,
my two favorite things.
687
00:35:30,396 --> 00:35:32,598
Let's do it!
I'm gonna eat this meat
688
00:35:32,664 --> 00:35:34,633
and save you
the fat, big boy.
689
00:35:35,367 --> 00:35:38,170
MOLLIE: Bad boy!
690
00:35:38,237 --> 00:35:41,273
I'm frizzing!
Brush while you blow.
691
00:35:41,340 --> 00:35:42,674
Oh, look at your hair.
692
00:35:42,741 --> 00:35:45,043
I can't believe
I'm entrusting you
with mine.
693
00:35:45,644 --> 00:35:47,279
Oh...
694
00:35:47,346 --> 00:35:49,748
What's this guy
doing here?
695
00:35:49,815 --> 00:35:52,751
ROCKS: Gonna get some treats?
Get some for me, will ya?
696
00:35:52,818 --> 00:35:54,019
(SCREAMING)
697
00:35:54,085 --> 00:35:55,654
Hit the clicker!
Hit the clicker!
698
00:35:55,721 --> 00:35:57,055
Daphne, sit.
699
00:35:57,122 --> 00:35:59,024
Oh, no, it's all the
way back like this.
700
00:35:59,090 --> 00:36:00,158
Daphne, beg up.
701
00:36:00,226 --> 00:36:01,660
You start
with one hand.
702
00:36:01,727 --> 00:36:03,495
Two hands.
Well, if you insist.
703
00:36:03,562 --> 00:36:05,864
Rocks, roll over.
704
00:36:05,931 --> 00:36:07,132
Huh?
705
00:36:07,199 --> 00:36:08,834
Roll over like this.
706
00:36:11,837 --> 00:36:15,274
(CHUCKLES)
You guys are
total entertainment.
707
00:36:15,341 --> 00:36:17,943
This is better
than chasing hubcaps.
Do that again.
708
00:36:18,009 --> 00:36:20,946
Daphne, paw.
Good girl!
Julie, paw.
Good girl!
709
00:36:21,012 --> 00:36:22,914
You're getting
so much better.
710
00:36:24,316 --> 00:36:26,218
No!
What?
711
00:36:27,152 --> 00:36:29,187
No!
What?
712
00:36:30,989 --> 00:36:33,359
No!
What?
713
00:36:35,527 --> 00:36:38,897
(JAMES HUMMING)
714
00:36:38,964 --> 00:36:40,966
Get that tall,
skinny man
out of my spaghetti.
715
00:36:41,032 --> 00:36:43,969
Someone is playing
with their food.
No! No.
716
00:36:44,035 --> 00:36:47,239
ROCKS: Hey, kid,
shoot one of them round,
meaty things my way.
717
00:36:47,306 --> 00:36:48,974
(SIGHS) Begging
is so gauche.
718
00:36:49,040 --> 00:36:51,310
Kid, come through for me.
719
00:36:51,377 --> 00:36:56,315
Come on, come on.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
720
00:36:56,382 --> 00:36:58,784
Hey, he threw
meatballs!
721
00:36:58,850 --> 00:37:00,552
Squealer.
Spaghetti face!
722
00:37:00,619 --> 00:37:02,288
(BEEPING)
723
00:37:02,354 --> 00:37:04,823
(BARKING) What is that?
724
00:37:04,890 --> 00:37:07,125
Ice cream headache.
Pain, pain!
725
00:37:07,192 --> 00:37:08,594
Sorry, guys.
726
00:37:11,430 --> 00:37:12,664
Chicago.
727
00:37:17,403 --> 00:37:20,038
You kids behave yourselves.
728
00:37:20,105 --> 00:37:24,610
Oh, my poor nerves.
Little high-strung,
aren't we, Daffy?
729
00:37:24,676 --> 00:37:27,245
I'm not high-strung.
I'm just sensitive.
730
00:37:27,313 --> 00:37:29,681
You got that
skeevy inbred look.
731
00:37:29,748 --> 00:37:32,418
Your mom
knew your cousin
a little too well.
732
00:37:32,484 --> 00:37:34,653
Better than your mother
knew your father.
733
00:37:34,720 --> 00:37:37,022
Put a sock in it!
734
00:37:37,088 --> 00:37:39,858
I hope you don't have to
be gone very long.
735
00:37:42,461 --> 00:37:46,532
Whoo! Hey, pal,
time for my walk,
remember?
736
00:37:46,598 --> 00:37:48,534
Hey, I'm getting
kind of squirmy here.
737
00:37:50,602 --> 00:37:53,639
Okay, you guys are busy.
I'll go right here.
No problem.
738
00:37:56,875 --> 00:37:58,744
No!
What is he doing?
739
00:38:01,980 --> 00:38:03,114
Bad dog!
740
00:38:03,181 --> 00:38:04,383
Right hand, green.
741
00:38:06,051 --> 00:38:10,589
Unbelievably, incredibly
endlessly bad dog!
742
00:38:10,656 --> 00:38:12,791
ROCKS: Hey, I just
marked that spot.
743
00:38:12,858 --> 00:38:15,461
Well, I'll do it
again tomorrow.
744
00:38:15,527 --> 00:38:18,764
All clear!
Can you really fly?
745
00:38:18,830 --> 00:38:21,733
I'll teach you.
How lovely
to fly!
746
00:38:21,800 --> 00:38:23,168
How do you do it?
747
00:38:23,234 --> 00:38:27,639
Just think lovely,
wonderful thoughts.
748
00:38:27,706 --> 00:38:30,409
And up you go!
749
00:38:31,777 --> 00:38:33,278
(PHONE RINGING)
750
00:38:36,114 --> 00:38:38,216
Hello?
Hi, honey.
751
00:38:38,283 --> 00:38:40,886
How you doing?
This has been
a week of hell.
752
00:38:40,952 --> 00:38:42,120
Is it Daphne?
753
00:38:42,187 --> 00:38:45,524
It's not Daphne.
It is that other moron, Rocks.
754
00:38:45,591 --> 00:38:47,993
He pees all over...
He'll grow
out of that.
755
00:38:48,059 --> 00:38:51,430
All right. He also is
a shoe gourmet.
756
00:38:51,497 --> 00:38:54,433
He only eats Charles Jourdan.
He never eats my tennis shoes.
757
00:38:56,802 --> 00:38:59,505
* Now think
lovely thoughts
758
00:39:00,939 --> 00:39:03,241
* Think lovely thoughts
759
00:39:04,075 --> 00:39:05,677
Fishing!
760
00:39:05,744 --> 00:39:08,346
Hopscotch!
Candy!
761
00:39:08,414 --> 00:39:09,915
Daddy.
762
00:39:09,981 --> 00:39:12,751
GIRL: Christmas!
PETER PAN: That's it!
763
00:39:12,818 --> 00:39:15,186
JAMES: I'm sorry, Mollie.
I wish I could be there.
764
00:39:15,253 --> 00:39:17,022
I feel I could
train him, you know.
765
00:39:17,088 --> 00:39:18,356
Train him?
766
00:39:18,424 --> 00:39:20,659
Doctor Doolittle couldn't
train this dog.
767
00:39:20,726 --> 00:39:24,129
So, what are you thinking?
We gotta find a new home?
768
00:39:24,630 --> 00:39:26,331
Well...
769
00:39:26,398 --> 00:39:29,067
Oh, man,
you won again.
770
00:39:29,134 --> 00:39:30,135
ROCKS: But of course.
771
00:39:31,302 --> 00:39:33,605
No, I'll give him
one more chance.
772
00:39:33,672 --> 00:39:37,208
Great! Listen, hey,
if he chews anything else,
773
00:39:37,275 --> 00:39:39,210
he's gone, okay?
774
00:39:39,277 --> 00:39:40,278
Okay.
775
00:39:42,313 --> 00:39:45,150
I miss you.
I'm excited about
seeing you tonight.
776
00:39:45,216 --> 00:39:48,587
That's why I'm calling.
Listen, we're going
to France tonight.
777
00:39:48,654 --> 00:39:50,822
(SIGHS) France!
778
00:39:50,889 --> 00:39:54,893
James, you have
already been gone
for two whole weeks!
779
00:39:54,960 --> 00:39:57,395
I gotta go.
They're wanting me
to board now.
780
00:39:57,463 --> 00:39:59,030
All right.
I'll tell the kids.
781
00:40:01,232 --> 00:40:03,635
Julie, come say
bye to Daddy.
782
00:40:03,702 --> 00:40:05,471
(SCREAMING)
783
00:40:07,405 --> 00:40:10,075
Honey, what
were you doing?
784
00:40:10,141 --> 00:40:11,376
Flying.
785
00:40:11,443 --> 00:40:13,912
Flying? Honey,
you can't fly.
786
00:40:13,979 --> 00:40:16,347
But those people can.
What peo...
787
00:40:16,414 --> 00:40:19,384
Oh! That is
make believe.
788
00:40:19,451 --> 00:40:22,721
Remember when
we had our discussion
about make believe?
789
00:40:22,788 --> 00:40:26,958
But the basketball men
isn't make believe
and they can fly.
790
00:40:27,025 --> 00:40:30,729
Is that why you like them,
'cause you think
they can fly?
791
00:40:30,796 --> 00:40:34,099
They can't fly either.
But they can jump really high.
792
00:40:34,165 --> 00:40:35,701
Daddy flies.
793
00:40:35,767 --> 00:40:37,636
He does fly
794
00:40:37,703 --> 00:40:39,605
but he flies
in an airplane.
795
00:40:39,671 --> 00:40:42,841
Daddy doesn't fly...
Daddy.
796
00:40:42,908 --> 00:40:44,510
(PHONE BEEPING)
797
00:40:44,576 --> 00:40:47,345
James? James!
798
00:40:47,412 --> 00:40:49,014
Honey!
799
00:40:49,080 --> 00:40:50,882
(BEEPING CONTINUES)
800
00:41:00,859 --> 00:41:02,994
Rocks!
801
00:41:03,061 --> 00:41:06,097
I like yours!
Yeah, it's so cute.
802
00:41:06,164 --> 00:41:08,800
Hey, where's
your collage?
Didn't do it.
803
00:41:08,867 --> 00:41:10,902
Miss Craig's
gonna slime you.
804
00:41:10,969 --> 00:41:12,370
Big deal.
805
00:41:12,437 --> 00:41:16,508
Excuse me, ladies.
Why didn't you do
your assignment?
806
00:41:16,575 --> 00:41:20,011
Mom, it's stupid.
We're supposed to make
a Christmas collage
807
00:41:20,078 --> 00:41:22,848
of things we wanna ask
Santa for, but there is no...
808
00:41:22,914 --> 00:41:26,752
(SHUSHING) Don't say that
in front of your sister
or people in your class.
809
00:41:26,818 --> 00:41:29,254
You don't wanna upset
everybody, do you?
810
00:41:29,320 --> 00:41:30,856
(SIGHS)
It's the truth,
isn't it?
811
00:41:30,922 --> 00:41:33,024
What's the truth?
Nothing, honey.
812
00:41:33,091 --> 00:41:37,195
Mike, just do me this favor.
Please don't say
anything to anybody.
813
00:41:38,496 --> 00:41:41,332
Okay.
All right.
Bash brothers!
814
00:41:41,399 --> 00:41:43,702
We are bad...
Mom. Mom!
815
00:41:43,769 --> 00:41:46,237
What?
You're a girl.
816
00:41:46,304 --> 00:41:47,873
Well, he'll
be back soon.
817
00:41:47,939 --> 00:41:49,575
(SCHOOL BELL RINGING)
818
00:41:59,350 --> 00:42:02,220
(SPEAKS FRENCH)
Thank you.
819
00:42:02,287 --> 00:42:06,725
(SPEAKING FRENCH)
Monsieur Ubriacco.
820
00:42:06,792 --> 00:42:11,462
(SPEAKING FRENCH)
821
00:42:11,529 --> 00:42:13,665
Did he win
at the dog races?
822
00:42:13,732 --> 00:42:14,933
Ma!
823
00:42:15,000 --> 00:42:16,835
Where'd he get that jacket?
He looks...
824
00:42:16,902 --> 00:42:18,269
Hot! The word's hot.
825
00:42:18,336 --> 00:42:19,337
Hot. Hot.
826
00:42:21,573 --> 00:42:23,041
Merci.
827
00:42:23,108 --> 00:42:24,109
Beaucoup.
828
00:42:25,510 --> 00:42:28,446
Excuse me.
This is a special evening.
829
00:42:28,513 --> 00:42:33,619
I'd like to order
a bottle of Cristal.
This is for the table.
830
00:42:33,685 --> 00:42:35,386
(WHISPERING)
He's picked up
a few things.
831
00:42:35,453 --> 00:42:36,554
Oh!
832
00:42:39,324 --> 00:42:40,792
What?
833
00:42:40,859 --> 00:42:43,328
Six months in Miami,
I come back,
it's the twilight zone.
834
00:42:43,394 --> 00:42:47,799
I just thought,
you've had faith in me
all these years.
835
00:42:47,866 --> 00:42:51,236
What better way
to show my thanks to my
mother-in-law than to...
836
00:42:51,302 --> 00:42:54,539
Than to rub
her nose in it.
I get it.
837
00:42:54,606 --> 00:42:57,442
You made good.
I'm impressed.
Okay?
838
00:42:58,243 --> 00:42:59,310
Okay. Thank you.
839
00:43:06,584 --> 00:43:08,954
Gentlemen, would you
excuse me for one moment?
Certainly.
840
00:43:10,055 --> 00:43:11,623
Oh, my God.
There's Samantha.
841
00:43:11,690 --> 00:43:13,558
Great.
What?
842
00:43:13,625 --> 00:43:14,960
I feel so schlumpy
around her.
843
00:43:15,026 --> 00:43:16,728
Do I have dog hairs
on my back?
844
00:43:16,795 --> 00:43:19,464
SAMANTHA: Hello, James.
Hello, Samantha.
This is my mother-in-law.
845
00:43:19,530 --> 00:43:21,132
Rosie, this is
Samantha D'bonne.
846
00:43:21,199 --> 00:43:22,734
How do you do?
847
00:43:22,801 --> 00:43:24,202
Hello.
848
00:43:24,269 --> 00:43:25,971
You know
my wife Mollie.
849
00:43:26,037 --> 00:43:27,472
Yes, of course.
Mollie!
850
00:43:27,538 --> 00:43:28,807
Nice to see you again.
851
00:43:28,874 --> 00:43:31,877
Did you
ever find a job?
852
00:43:31,943 --> 00:43:35,280
I... I...
I'm starving.
Let's order.
853
00:43:35,346 --> 00:43:36,581
Oh, do try the duck.
854
00:43:36,648 --> 00:43:39,450
Samantha ought to know.
She recommended the place.
855
00:43:40,485 --> 00:43:42,120
Oh, you did?
856
00:43:42,187 --> 00:43:44,389
How else would
we get in a place
like this?
857
00:43:44,455 --> 00:43:47,192
(CHUCKLING)
858
00:43:47,258 --> 00:43:50,696
Thank you.
My pleasure.
Have a lovely evening.
859
00:43:51,529 --> 00:43:53,398
Nice jacket.
860
00:43:53,464 --> 00:43:55,100
Oh, God,
she's teasing me.
861
00:43:55,166 --> 00:43:57,002
She bought
this jacket for me.
862
00:43:58,203 --> 00:44:00,005
She bought you
this jacket?
863
00:44:00,071 --> 00:44:02,440
We were in France
and we were at
a fancy restaurant.
864
00:44:02,507 --> 00:44:04,475
She didn't want me
to be wearing my uniform,
865
00:44:04,542 --> 00:44:06,611
so she had the driver
buy this jacket.
866
00:44:09,114 --> 00:44:11,783
Of course!
867
00:44:11,850 --> 00:44:13,151
Gosh, she forgot
her pocketbook.
868
00:44:13,218 --> 00:44:14,720
Hey, Samantha.
869
00:44:16,554 --> 00:44:20,926
Um, is it just me
or was she...
870
00:44:20,992 --> 00:44:23,161
I wanted to slap
her teeth out.
871
00:44:23,228 --> 00:44:24,930
It is obvious,
isn't it?
872
00:44:24,996 --> 00:44:28,399
She practically
offered him
Taster's Choice.
873
00:44:28,466 --> 00:44:30,101
I don't know
what to do.
874
00:44:30,168 --> 00:44:33,038
I know people.
We could have her audited.
875
00:44:33,104 --> 00:44:35,240
That is not a good idea.
876
00:44:35,306 --> 00:44:37,743
It's my fault.
I pushed him
and pushed him...
877
00:44:37,809 --> 00:44:39,845
And pushed him to
make him exactly
what I wanted him to be.
878
00:44:39,911 --> 00:44:42,047
Now he is.
I hate it.
879
00:44:42,113 --> 00:44:44,449
He's a keeper.
You better talk to him.
880
00:44:44,515 --> 00:44:46,551
I know it.
881
00:44:46,617 --> 00:44:47,986
Can you excuse me
a second?
882
00:44:48,053 --> 00:44:50,789
Make a scene.
Here, throw this
in her face.
883
00:44:50,856 --> 00:44:53,358
Ma, I am just gonna
call the sitter.
884
00:44:54,926 --> 00:44:57,228
(PHONE RINGING)
Here, Rocks.
885
00:44:57,295 --> 00:44:59,164
Come on, boy!
886
00:44:59,230 --> 00:45:02,734
Hello?
Yeah, everything's cool.
887
00:45:03,668 --> 00:45:04,836
All right. Bye.
888
00:45:04,903 --> 00:45:07,538
(GLASS SHATTERING)
889
00:45:08,706 --> 00:45:10,575
You hooligans!
890
00:45:10,641 --> 00:45:13,078
What do you do
for fun? Shed?
891
00:45:13,144 --> 00:45:16,447
At least I don't have
vermin building
condos in my fur.
892
00:45:16,514 --> 00:45:18,850
Rate you're going,
you won't have fur.
893
00:45:18,917 --> 00:45:20,551
That kid's giving
you a bald spot.
894
00:45:20,618 --> 00:45:24,389
Oh? At least my
little mistress is kind.
Your child is demon spawn.
895
00:45:24,455 --> 00:45:26,191
(IMITATING DAPHNE)
"Your child is demon spawn."
896
00:45:26,257 --> 00:45:29,727
Quit brushing her.
She already looks
like a Q-tip.
897
00:45:29,795 --> 00:45:31,763
Your dog smells
like a diaper.
898
00:45:31,830 --> 00:45:34,365
Does not!
Diaper dog, diaper dog!
899
00:45:34,432 --> 00:45:36,067
Q-tip head dog.
900
00:45:36,134 --> 00:45:38,569
Stinky dog.
Bald-butted dog.
901
00:45:39,504 --> 00:45:42,740
(EXCLAIMING)
902
00:45:42,808 --> 00:45:45,043
ROCKS: I got it!
I got it! This is mine.
No problem.
903
00:45:45,110 --> 00:45:46,477
(BARKING)
904
00:45:46,544 --> 00:45:47,979
(EXCLAIMING)
905
00:45:48,046 --> 00:45:50,181
I'm homeless!
Oh, no.
906
00:45:50,248 --> 00:45:51,582
Uh-oh.
907
00:45:53,885 --> 00:45:55,020
What happened?
908
00:45:55,086 --> 00:45:56,888
You mongrel wretch!
909
00:45:56,955 --> 00:45:58,656
Get real.
It's just a box, Daffy.
910
00:45:58,723 --> 00:46:00,191
Daphne!
911
00:46:00,258 --> 00:46:03,228
Come on. I'm sorry.
Look, I can fix it.
912
00:46:03,294 --> 00:46:05,096
I never want to
see you again!
913
00:46:05,163 --> 00:46:06,764
That'll be tough.
I live here.
914
00:46:06,832 --> 00:46:09,334
We'll just see about that!
915
00:46:09,400 --> 00:46:10,902
Let's see.
916
00:46:10,969 --> 00:46:15,173
She yells the most
when he gets the ones
in boxes.
917
00:46:16,908 --> 00:46:21,012
What he sees in these
smelly things...
Oh courage, Daphne.
918
00:46:21,079 --> 00:46:23,114
I shall be rid
of him soon!
919
00:46:25,450 --> 00:46:28,686
There's nothing weird
about buying someone
dinner and clothing?
920
00:46:28,753 --> 00:46:30,856
No.
So if some guy asks
me to Lucerne...
921
00:46:30,922 --> 00:46:32,690
Then buys me a teddy,
is that okay?
922
00:46:32,757 --> 00:46:35,360
A jacket's not a teddy.
This is a teddy.
923
00:46:35,426 --> 00:46:36,962
(EXCLAIMS)
924
00:46:37,028 --> 00:46:41,066
I'm trying not to be
a shrew, yell, scream
and hate her guts.
925
00:46:41,132 --> 00:46:43,334
Although I wouldn't
mind seeing her
decomposing body
926
00:46:43,401 --> 00:46:45,236
rotting by the side
of a river.
927
00:46:45,303 --> 00:46:47,939
Look, James,
you don't have to
socialize with her.
928
00:46:48,006 --> 00:46:50,641
You can just
keep your eyes
on the road...
929
00:46:50,708 --> 00:46:53,778
Or the sky,
or whatever it is
you keep your eyes on.
930
00:46:53,845 --> 00:46:56,882
Answer me this.
Why is it that
I can trust you
931
00:46:56,948 --> 00:47:00,285
yet you are the one who had
an affair with her client
who happened to be married.
932
00:47:00,351 --> 00:47:02,387
Like eight billion years ago!
933
00:47:02,453 --> 00:47:04,822
You know
I never see him.
How do I know that?
934
00:47:04,890 --> 00:47:07,525
I can only trust.
I have faith in you.
935
00:47:07,592 --> 00:47:10,328
Well, you don't have
too much faith if
you keep bringing it up.
936
00:47:10,395 --> 00:47:12,797
I don't keep
on bring...
937
00:47:12,864 --> 00:47:15,800
Ah, honey,
listen to us.
938
00:47:15,867 --> 00:47:17,802
After six years,
we're still making
each other jealous.
939
00:47:17,869 --> 00:47:20,738
Isn't that pretty good?
I don't know.
940
00:47:20,805 --> 00:47:25,243
Ah, it's you I like.
It's not Samantha.
941
00:47:25,310 --> 00:47:29,047
I like you!
I'm crazy about you.
942
00:47:29,114 --> 00:47:30,681
I love you so much.
943
00:47:30,748 --> 00:47:33,018
Watch out for her.
She's real flirty.
944
00:47:33,084 --> 00:47:35,520
I know about girls
like that. I was one!
945
00:47:35,586 --> 00:47:37,288
(CHUCKLING)
946
00:47:38,056 --> 00:47:39,590
I promise.
Okay.
947
00:47:43,094 --> 00:47:44,930
What?
He did it.
948
00:47:44,996 --> 00:47:46,531
Mom, it was her fault.
949
00:47:48,166 --> 00:47:50,801
I'll put them to bed.
No, no, no!
Honey, honey.
950
00:47:50,868 --> 00:47:53,404
Don't ruin it.
Don't ruin the moment.
951
00:47:54,739 --> 00:47:56,141
(PAGER BEEPING)
952
00:47:56,207 --> 00:47:57,575
(BARKING)
953
00:47:59,377 --> 00:48:01,712
I don't have to go.
You have to go.
954
00:48:01,779 --> 00:48:04,515
You don't trust me.
I do!
I do trust you.
955
00:48:06,651 --> 00:48:08,319
I don't trust her.
956
00:48:11,289 --> 00:48:13,291
You two, come on.
957
00:48:13,358 --> 00:48:17,162
* Bells will be ringing
958
00:48:17,228 --> 00:48:21,232
* The glad, glad news
959
00:48:21,299 --> 00:48:25,536
* Oh, what a Christmas
960
00:48:25,603 --> 00:48:29,107
* To have the blues
961
00:48:29,174 --> 00:48:32,543
* My baby's gone
962
00:48:32,610 --> 00:48:37,115
* I have no friends
963
00:48:37,182 --> 00:48:40,885
* To wish me greetings
964
00:48:40,952 --> 00:48:45,123
* Oh, once again
965
00:48:45,190 --> 00:48:49,227
* Choirs will be singing
966
00:48:49,294 --> 00:48:53,164
* Silent Night
967
00:48:53,231 --> 00:48:56,934
* Those Christmas carols
968
00:48:57,002 --> 00:49:00,605
* By candlelight
969
00:49:00,671 --> 00:49:04,842
* Please come home
for Christmas
970
00:49:04,909 --> 00:49:09,180
* Please come home
for Christmas
971
00:49:09,247 --> 00:49:10,315
(GASPS)
972
00:49:10,381 --> 00:49:12,583
* If not for Christmas
973
00:49:12,650 --> 00:49:17,122
* By New Year's night
974
00:49:17,188 --> 00:49:20,925
* Friends and relations
975
00:49:20,992 --> 00:49:25,496
* Send salutations
976
00:49:25,563 --> 00:49:31,769
* Just as sure as
the stars shine above
977
00:49:33,138 --> 00:49:37,142
* Oh, this is Christmas
978
00:49:37,208 --> 00:49:41,146
* Christmas, my dear
979
00:49:41,212 --> 00:49:43,914
* The time of year
980
00:49:43,981 --> 00:49:49,187
* To be with the one
that you love
981
00:49:49,254 --> 00:49:53,091
* Choirs will be singing
982
00:49:53,158 --> 00:49:57,262
* Silent Night
983
00:49:57,328 --> 00:50:01,199
* Those Christmas carols
984
00:50:01,266 --> 00:50:04,869
* By candlelight
985
00:50:04,935 --> 00:50:06,237
* Please come home
for Christmas
986
00:50:06,304 --> 00:50:08,106
Hi, honey.
MOLLIE: Where are you?
987
00:50:08,173 --> 00:50:09,340
I'm in London.
988
00:50:09,407 --> 00:50:11,276
I'm in San Francisco, honey.
989
00:50:11,342 --> 00:50:12,743
JAMES: I'm in Reno.
990
00:50:15,113 --> 00:50:16,847
We're in Dallas.
991
00:50:16,914 --> 00:50:20,218
What do you mean
I'm being audited?
It's not even tax season!
992
00:50:21,286 --> 00:50:24,889
* Then won't you tell me
993
00:50:24,955 --> 00:50:29,227
* You'll never more roam
994
00:50:29,294 --> 00:50:31,562
* Christmas and New Years
995
00:50:31,629 --> 00:50:32,963
(BUSY SIGNAL)
996
00:50:33,030 --> 00:50:36,934
* Will find you at home
997
00:50:37,001 --> 00:50:40,171
* There'll be no more sorrow
998
00:50:41,606 --> 00:50:43,374
Mom, where's Dad?
999
00:50:43,974 --> 00:50:46,377
He'll be home soon.
1000
00:50:46,444 --> 00:50:49,680
Will he be here
for Christmas?
1001
00:50:49,747 --> 00:50:51,449
Your dad wouldn't miss
Christmas with us
1002
00:50:51,516 --> 00:50:53,518
for all the stars
in the sky.
1003
00:50:53,584 --> 00:50:55,420
What about the moon?
1004
00:50:57,422 --> 00:50:59,090
The moon too.
1005
00:51:00,425 --> 00:51:02,493
Bedtime.
Bedtime.
1006
00:51:04,729 --> 00:51:06,364
(PHONE BEEPING)
1007
00:51:10,868 --> 00:51:13,238
I love you.
I love you too.
1008
00:51:13,304 --> 00:51:15,072
(BOTH SNORT)
1009
00:51:17,208 --> 00:51:18,976
(BOTH SNORT)
1010
00:51:20,811 --> 00:51:22,813
Good night.
Good night.
1011
00:51:31,122 --> 00:51:33,791
(BUSY SIGNAL)
1012
00:51:38,429 --> 00:51:39,597
(SIGHS)
1013
00:51:47,905 --> 00:51:50,808
(LATIN MUSIC PLAYING)
1014
00:52:17,302 --> 00:52:19,537
She thinks
we're in Dallas?
She bought it.
1015
00:52:19,604 --> 00:52:21,872
BOTH: Dumb cow! Ha!
1016
00:52:34,151 --> 00:52:36,086
Ho, ho, ho, ho!
1017
00:52:36,153 --> 00:52:38,889
SANTA: And what do you
want for Christmas,
little boy?
1018
00:52:38,956 --> 00:52:41,526
I want a Porsche...
1019
00:52:41,592 --> 00:52:43,761
(GROANS) Jerk!
1020
00:52:43,828 --> 00:52:46,197
Well, Mollie!
1021
00:52:46,264 --> 00:52:49,600
I never asked you
what you want
for Christmas.
1022
00:52:49,667 --> 00:52:51,436
Oh, Santa...
1023
00:52:51,502 --> 00:52:55,406
I can't think of
any present that I'd
rather have than... You.
1024
00:52:58,509 --> 00:52:59,910
Oh, Albert!
1025
00:53:01,746 --> 00:53:05,483
(SIGNS) Come here,
you stud muffin!
1026
00:53:21,766 --> 00:53:25,236
(SANTA CLAUS IS COMING
TO TOWN PLAYING)
1027
00:53:27,137 --> 00:53:30,107
(LATIN MUSIC PLAYING)
1028
00:53:36,647 --> 00:53:37,648
(SAMANTHA GROANS)
1029
00:53:37,715 --> 00:53:38,716
(CRASHING)
1030
00:53:40,451 --> 00:53:43,554
Honey,
what are we doing?
1031
00:53:43,621 --> 00:53:45,256
I don't know.
1032
00:53:45,323 --> 00:53:47,892
This isn't us.
We'd never do this.
1033
00:53:47,958 --> 00:53:49,760
Think we're dreaming?
1034
00:53:49,827 --> 00:53:53,798
I think it's one
of those dreams where
you know you're dreaming.
1035
00:53:56,467 --> 00:53:58,068
Oh!
1036
00:53:58,135 --> 00:54:02,740
Excuse me,
but we were
having an affair.
1037
00:54:02,807 --> 00:54:05,710
Honey, does this mean
we can do whatever
we want in the dreams?
1038
00:54:05,776 --> 00:54:06,911
Yeah.
1039
00:54:07,778 --> 00:54:09,113
Excuse me.
1040
00:54:10,315 --> 00:54:13,518
(GROANING)
1041
00:54:14,852 --> 00:54:15,853
(BLOWS)
1042
00:54:20,391 --> 00:54:23,294
(EXCLAIMS) You see that?
I told you they weren't real!
1043
00:54:24,028 --> 00:54:25,129
(SCOFFS)
1044
00:54:29,600 --> 00:54:32,670
Oh, honey,
you know
I can't dance.
1045
00:54:32,737 --> 00:54:35,373
You can dance.
This is our dream!
1046
00:55:45,109 --> 00:55:47,645
Oh... James.
1047
00:55:47,712 --> 00:55:50,548
Excuse me, mistress.
Please wake up.
1048
00:55:50,615 --> 00:55:53,918
I need to be
walked quite badly
as a matter of fact.
1049
00:55:53,984 --> 00:55:56,587
Oh, well,
I'm a lady.
I can hold it.
1050
00:55:56,654 --> 00:55:58,956
No, I can't!
I'm desperate!
1051
00:55:59,023 --> 00:56:02,192
Please! Oh, God.
She's in a coma.
Please wake up.
1052
00:56:02,259 --> 00:56:04,395
I can't have an accident
like a common mutt.
1053
00:56:04,462 --> 00:56:06,564
It's too demeaning.
Oh, please!
1054
00:56:06,631 --> 00:56:10,134
Baby, you are so jumpy.
Let her alone.
She looks happy.
1055
00:56:10,200 --> 00:56:12,503
What am I supposed to do?
1056
00:56:12,570 --> 00:56:14,772
I'll take you out.
But... How?
1057
00:56:14,839 --> 00:56:16,841
Come on.
1058
00:56:16,907 --> 00:56:19,710
DAPHNE: Call me a realist,
but we do need a master
to open the door.
1059
00:56:19,777 --> 00:56:21,946
Wanna bet?
1060
00:56:22,012 --> 00:56:24,248
Oh, how did you
learn to do that?
1061
00:56:24,314 --> 00:56:27,117
I know things
they don't teach
in obedience school.
1062
00:56:27,184 --> 00:56:29,820
Excuse me,
I was valedictorian.
ROCKS: Give it up, kid.
1063
00:56:29,887 --> 00:56:32,122
Come on!
DAPHNE: Wait a minute.
What about my leash?
1064
00:56:32,189 --> 00:56:35,760
ROCKS: You haven't lived
till you try it naked!
Don't get fresh.
1065
00:56:40,330 --> 00:56:41,932
How about a
little dinner out?
1066
00:56:41,999 --> 00:56:43,468
I'm not hungry.
1067
00:56:43,534 --> 00:56:45,169
You dolls
always say that.
1068
00:56:45,235 --> 00:56:47,972
Forget your diet.
Let's get Italian.
DAPHNE: I can't.
1069
00:56:48,038 --> 00:56:51,041
I'm so fat I look like
an English sheepdog.
1070
00:56:51,108 --> 00:56:53,377
Are you nuts?
You look great!
Oh, well.
1071
00:56:53,444 --> 00:56:56,914
When I was young,
I had one of those
greyhound hard bodies.
1072
00:56:56,981 --> 00:56:59,116
You're a kid!
1073
00:56:59,183 --> 00:57:00,885
I'm pushing seven.
1074
00:57:00,951 --> 00:57:03,287
Seven? You don't
look a day over five.
1075
00:57:03,353 --> 00:57:06,156
Do you really think so?
Maybe a little Chinese.
1076
00:57:06,223 --> 00:57:09,193
ROCKS: That's the stuff.
I know just the place.
Follow me.
1077
00:57:11,996 --> 00:57:14,565
ROCKS: It's nothing fancy,
but wait till you taste
their moo goo gai pan.
1078
00:57:14,632 --> 00:57:16,734
Oh, great!
ROCKS: I hope
it's on the menu.
1079
00:57:16,801 --> 00:57:18,936
DAPHNE: Where are
the dog dishes?
1080
00:57:19,003 --> 00:57:21,071
We don't need
dog dishes.
1081
00:57:21,138 --> 00:57:22,206
What are you doing?
1082
00:57:22,272 --> 00:57:23,908
Getting us take out.
1083
00:57:23,974 --> 00:57:25,610
How clever!
1084
00:57:25,676 --> 00:57:28,045
(CHUCKLING) And green tea
ice cream goes great
with lobster sauce.
1085
00:57:28,112 --> 00:57:30,681
(BURPS)
Oh, excuse me.
1086
00:57:30,748 --> 00:57:31,749
Good, huh?
1087
00:57:34,051 --> 00:57:36,587
So, what do you think
about the world at large?
1088
00:57:36,654 --> 00:57:41,526
There's a certain exhilaration
to this leashless state.
1089
00:57:41,592 --> 00:57:43,360
DAPHNE:
When I think about it,
1090
00:57:43,427 --> 00:57:47,865
Samantha never let me
run free or petted me
or played with me.
1091
00:57:47,932 --> 00:57:50,535
I never liked Samantha,
and you know what else?
What?
1092
00:57:50,601 --> 00:57:52,537
I hate this haircut.
1093
00:57:52,603 --> 00:57:54,371
My butt is freezing!
1094
00:57:54,438 --> 00:57:55,773
(ROCKS LAUGHS)
1095
00:57:55,840 --> 00:57:58,475
Nice butt.
No offense, no offense!
1096
00:58:02,112 --> 00:58:04,248
DAPHNE: It's getting
bright out. Maybe we
should get back.
1097
00:58:04,314 --> 00:58:06,116
Why? It's only the
shank of the evening.
1098
00:58:06,183 --> 00:58:07,685
We really should.
1099
00:58:07,752 --> 00:58:09,720
All right, no problem.
I know a shortcut.
1100
00:58:09,787 --> 00:58:10,955
Through that?
1101
00:58:11,021 --> 00:58:12,189
Yeah!
1102
00:58:12,256 --> 00:58:14,024
Wait a minute.
What is it?
1103
00:58:14,091 --> 00:58:16,961
ROCKS: Mud. You've never
seen mud before?
Uh-uh.
1104
00:58:17,027 --> 00:58:20,397
It's when the wet stuff
comes down and hits the dirt.
1105
00:58:21,065 --> 00:58:22,066
Dirt?
1106
00:58:22,132 --> 00:58:23,934
You have been sheltered.
1107
00:58:24,001 --> 00:58:26,704
I'm not gonna lie to you.
It's not the highlight
of our evening.
1108
00:58:26,771 --> 00:58:29,173
ROCKS: Just got to
grit your teeth
and slog through it.
1109
00:58:29,239 --> 00:58:32,810
Come on.
Oh, no. There is no
possible way I could...
1110
00:58:34,144 --> 00:58:38,716
Hmm. Firm...
Yet squishy.
1111
00:58:39,617 --> 00:58:41,285
Yeah. I'm sorry.
1112
00:58:41,351 --> 00:58:43,854
Sorry? I like it!
1113
00:58:43,921 --> 00:58:49,794
The oozy, gooeyness of it,
it's so... Sensual!
1114
00:58:49,860 --> 00:58:52,630
DAPHNE: It's glorious!
ROCKS: It's mud.
1115
00:58:52,697 --> 00:58:54,098
Play with me!
ROCKS: Now?
1116
00:58:54,164 --> 00:58:56,133
DAPHNE: Play with me
in this mud.
1117
00:58:56,200 --> 00:58:58,836
ROCKS: You're a wild thing!
Whoo!
1118
00:59:02,973 --> 00:59:05,475
DAPHNE: This is
totally filthy!
1119
00:59:10,514 --> 00:59:13,784
(CLEARS THROAT)
Uh, by the way,
1120
00:59:13,851 --> 00:59:16,587
I never asked you...
What's your name?
1121
00:59:16,654 --> 00:59:18,889
Me? They call me "No."
1122
00:59:18,956 --> 00:59:22,259
Silly!
"No" isn't your name!
1123
00:59:22,326 --> 00:59:24,028
That's what they say
when you're bad.
1124
00:59:24,094 --> 00:59:27,564
What's another word
they say all the time
to you?
1125
00:59:27,632 --> 00:59:29,199
Well, there's that
"Rocks" thing.
1126
00:59:29,266 --> 00:59:31,836
DAPHNE: Rocks! That's it!
That's your name!
1127
00:59:31,902 --> 00:59:34,571
You are one smart cookie!
1128
00:59:34,639 --> 00:59:36,340
You finally noticed, huh?
1129
00:59:36,406 --> 00:59:38,709
ROCKS: Be cool.
Here comes the doorman.
1130
00:59:39,309 --> 00:59:41,111
(ROCKS HUMMING)
1131
00:59:44,481 --> 00:59:46,116
Permit me
to walk you
to your door.
1132
00:59:46,183 --> 00:59:49,286
DAPHNE: (GIGGLES)
I almost hate
for this to end.
1133
00:59:49,353 --> 00:59:54,291
Well, Rocks, thank you
for a wonderful evening.
1134
00:59:54,358 --> 00:59:56,293
It's so exciting out there.
1135
00:59:56,360 --> 00:59:59,463
But it sure is nice
to have a warm place
to come back to,
1136
00:59:59,529 --> 01:00:01,131
where you don't have
to fight for food
1137
01:00:01,198 --> 01:00:03,701
and people don't try
to throw you
in the back of trucks.
1138
01:00:03,768 --> 01:00:05,502
Oh, you mean home?
1139
01:00:05,569 --> 01:00:06,737
Is that what this is?
1140
01:00:06,804 --> 01:00:08,739
It's our home.
1141
01:00:08,806 --> 01:00:11,909
Yeah, home.
I like the ring of that.
1142
01:00:11,976 --> 01:00:12,977
MOLLIE: No!
1143
01:00:14,712 --> 01:00:16,413
Rocks!
1144
01:00:16,480 --> 01:00:18,382
You have eaten
your last shoe
around this house!
1145
01:00:18,448 --> 01:00:20,484
Oh, no!
What'd I do?
1146
01:00:20,550 --> 01:00:23,453
You are out of here!
No!
1147
01:00:23,520 --> 01:00:27,191
Mike, hold on.
Honey, open the door.
1148
01:00:27,257 --> 01:00:29,794
Mike, will you please
open the door?
1149
01:00:30,661 --> 01:00:32,162
MIKEY: I want Daddy!
1150
01:00:34,665 --> 01:00:36,100
(CRYING)
1151
01:00:36,166 --> 01:00:38,435
Hey, Merry Christmas, guys!
Merry Christmas.
1152
01:00:38,502 --> 01:00:40,771
Merry Christmas, Tom.
1153
01:00:40,838 --> 01:00:43,741
Merry Christmas, Dave.
Merry Christmas.
1154
01:00:43,808 --> 01:00:46,076
Merry Christmas, Samantha.
Make sure my luggage
stays on the plane.
1155
01:00:46,143 --> 01:00:48,445
James!
1156
01:00:48,512 --> 01:00:52,082
(SIGHS) Oh, dear.
This is going
to be difficult.
1157
01:00:52,149 --> 01:00:55,820
I've spoken to Conti.
Having sworn that
he'd keep all our people,
1158
01:00:55,886 --> 01:00:57,855
he now says
he will not go through
with the merger
1159
01:00:57,922 --> 01:01:00,457
unless I let go
of 3,000 of them.
1160
01:01:00,524 --> 01:01:04,028
You're kidding!
Can't you do
anything about it?
1161
01:01:04,094 --> 01:01:05,796
I have this one chance.
1162
01:01:05,863 --> 01:01:08,966
He has this cabin.
He wants me to go there,
1163
01:01:09,033 --> 01:01:13,070
plead my case...
This afternoon.
1164
01:01:13,137 --> 01:01:17,041
Oh, Samantha, I...
It's Christmas Eve.
I... I can't.
1165
01:01:17,107 --> 01:01:19,977
I know, James.
If there was
any other way
1166
01:01:20,044 --> 01:01:22,813
but I mean,
3,000 people?
1167
01:01:25,783 --> 01:01:26,917
I'll be right back.
1168
01:01:26,984 --> 01:01:28,685
Ralph! Ralph!
1169
01:01:30,087 --> 01:01:32,857
Ralph, you're still current
with falcon, aren't you?
1170
01:01:32,923 --> 01:01:34,291
Oh, no. No way!
1171
01:01:34,358 --> 01:01:36,794
JAMES: Don, I know you are.
It's Christmas Eve, man.
1172
01:01:36,861 --> 01:01:39,363
Bill, I'll give you $500.
No, I can't.
1173
01:01:39,429 --> 01:01:41,465
$600.
Hell, I'll do it.
1174
01:01:41,531 --> 01:01:43,100
$750.
We're married.
1175
01:01:43,167 --> 01:01:44,501
And wanna stay that way.
1176
01:01:44,568 --> 01:01:47,037
Jerry might do it.
He's single.
Jerry! Jerry!
1177
01:01:47,104 --> 01:01:49,539
Too late.
He's on the runway.
1178
01:01:49,606 --> 01:01:51,375
Jerry! Jerry, stop!
1179
01:01:59,850 --> 01:02:02,753
Honey, I'm really sorry.
1180
01:02:02,820 --> 01:02:05,823
Listen, I did everything
I could to get out of this.
1181
01:02:05,890 --> 01:02:08,525
Honey, my parents
are gonna be here
in less than an hour.
1182
01:02:08,592 --> 01:02:12,596
I'm peeling potatoes,
and there's a sock stuck
in the garbage disposal.
1183
01:02:12,662 --> 01:02:14,564
I'll take care of it
when I get home.
1184
01:02:14,631 --> 01:02:17,334
And I'll be there for dinner,
I promise.
1185
01:02:18,402 --> 01:02:19,703
Can I talk to Mikey?
1186
01:02:19,770 --> 01:02:22,807
Yes. Mike,
it's your dad!
1187
01:02:29,279 --> 01:02:31,448
Hello.
Hey, Mike.
1188
01:02:31,515 --> 01:02:35,052
I know that you're not
feeling so good right now,
but when...
1189
01:02:35,119 --> 01:02:36,987
When are you coming home?
1190
01:02:37,054 --> 01:02:38,588
I'm gonna be home soon.
1191
01:02:39,189 --> 01:02:40,224
I want you now.
1192
01:02:40,290 --> 01:02:42,059
I know,
I wanna be there too.
1193
01:02:42,126 --> 01:02:46,096
Do you think Santa
would keep us apart
on Christmas Eve?
1194
01:02:46,163 --> 01:02:48,298
I mean, no way! Right?
1195
01:02:49,633 --> 01:02:51,101
Here's Julie.
1196
01:02:53,703 --> 01:02:55,072
Hi, Daddy!
1197
01:02:55,139 --> 01:02:57,041
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
1198
01:02:57,107 --> 01:02:58,608
Mary!
Mary who?
1199
01:02:58,675 --> 01:03:01,211
(GIGGLING)
Merry Christmas, Daddy!
1200
01:03:05,349 --> 01:03:07,551
Hi, Rocks.
How ya doing, kid?
1201
01:03:09,419 --> 01:03:11,521
I'm sorry.
Mom won't let you
in the house.
1202
01:03:11,588 --> 01:03:14,691
It's not like
I never spent the night
outside before.
1203
01:03:14,758 --> 01:03:16,626
Oh.
1204
01:03:16,693 --> 01:03:19,296
Why'd you have
to chew on her shoes?
1205
01:03:19,363 --> 01:03:22,166
It was me, Rocks.
I did it.
1206
01:03:23,167 --> 01:03:26,003
I set you up.
I know.
1207
01:03:26,070 --> 01:03:28,038
But it was before we...
1208
01:03:28,105 --> 01:03:30,674
I'd give anything
to take it back.
1209
01:03:30,740 --> 01:03:32,776
Mom says you
have to go away.
1210
01:03:32,843 --> 01:03:35,045
It was only
a matter of time.
1211
01:03:35,112 --> 01:03:37,714
I knew this home stuff
was too good to last.
1212
01:03:37,781 --> 01:03:40,417
Mom says someday
I can get another dog.
1213
01:03:41,852 --> 01:03:43,753
But I don't want another dog.
1214
01:03:44,889 --> 01:03:46,690
You're my dog.
1215
01:03:46,756 --> 01:03:50,460
That's okay, kid.
I don't belong here.
1216
01:03:50,527 --> 01:03:53,864
You're nice people.
You deserve a classy dog
like Daph.
1217
01:03:53,931 --> 01:03:55,832
She's got the looks,
the brains...
1218
01:03:55,900 --> 01:03:58,969
DAPHNE: Brains
aren't everything.
1219
01:03:59,036 --> 01:04:02,039
Yeah, right.
I may not be smart,
but I know I'm out of here.
1220
01:04:02,106 --> 01:04:04,741
You are smart.
You are!
1221
01:04:04,808 --> 01:04:07,511
If you'd pay attention,
you could learn everything
they want you to.
1222
01:04:07,577 --> 01:04:10,447
You mean tricks?
It's too late for that.
1223
01:04:10,514 --> 01:04:13,683
Not with America's
most over-trained dog
as your teacher.
1224
01:04:24,161 --> 01:04:25,896
Well, here we are.
1225
01:04:25,963 --> 01:04:27,497
Do you mind
if I use the phone?
1226
01:04:27,564 --> 01:04:30,968
Oh, no. There's one
in the kitchen,
to the right.
1227
01:04:46,250 --> 01:04:48,852
JAMES: This line is dead.
Do you have another line?
1228
01:04:48,919 --> 01:04:51,321
There's a fax machine here.
1229
01:04:51,388 --> 01:04:54,124
Oh, what's this?
It's from Conti.
1230
01:04:54,191 --> 01:04:55,325
You're going to have
to read it to me.
1231
01:04:55,392 --> 01:04:57,194
I can't see
without my glasses.
1232
01:04:59,063 --> 01:05:02,732
"Won't be in until
late tonight, possibly
first thing tomorrow.
1233
01:05:02,799 --> 01:05:04,935
"Don't leave.
Please make
yourself at home."
1234
01:05:05,002 --> 01:05:07,137
Oh!
Oh, man!
1235
01:05:09,139 --> 01:05:11,675
This is dead too!
Damn!
1236
01:05:11,741 --> 01:05:13,777
I gotta go.
I'd better stop
the driver.
1237
01:05:13,843 --> 01:05:15,645
He's gone.
He's gone?
1238
01:05:17,381 --> 01:05:19,783
I can't miss
my family's Christmas!
1239
01:05:19,849 --> 01:05:22,752
James, I feel absolutely
ghastly about this.
1240
01:05:23,520 --> 01:05:26,223
Scotch?
1241
01:05:26,290 --> 01:05:29,426
Okay, let's start
with something easy.
"Sit" is very popular.
1242
01:05:29,493 --> 01:05:31,728
You've heard them say that?
Sounds familiar.
1243
01:05:31,795 --> 01:05:35,232
Okay, front paws stiff,
butt on floor.
1244
01:05:35,299 --> 01:05:37,301
That's it.
That's all
there is to it.
1245
01:05:37,367 --> 01:05:39,403
You're kidding!
That's what they've been
babbling about?
1246
01:05:39,469 --> 01:05:41,171
What can I say?
It's a power trip.
1247
01:05:41,238 --> 01:05:43,340
Uh-oh, busted.
1248
01:05:43,407 --> 01:05:44,874
ROCKS: Hey, kid's mom!
1249
01:05:44,941 --> 01:05:46,843
Hey, let's do the sit thing.
1250
01:05:46,910 --> 01:05:49,146
ROCKS: Come over here!
Look, ask me!
1251
01:05:50,414 --> 01:05:52,282
Oh. What's with you?
1252
01:05:53,217 --> 01:05:54,751
You're being affectionate?
1253
01:05:56,186 --> 01:05:57,454
Try guilty.
1254
01:05:57,521 --> 01:05:58,755
Well!
1255
01:05:58,822 --> 01:06:03,027
You do have a sweet side,
don't you? Yeah!
1256
01:06:03,093 --> 01:06:05,062
Please don't
send Rocks away.
1257
01:06:05,129 --> 01:06:07,297
Here!
Over here, look!
1258
01:06:07,364 --> 01:06:09,499
See, I got
the sit thing nailed.
1259
01:06:09,566 --> 01:06:12,869
(SIGHS) He's decent, loyal...
Everything I'm not.
1260
01:06:12,936 --> 01:06:16,073
What? Do you miss Rocks?
1261
01:06:16,673 --> 01:06:18,075
(WHIMPERING)
1262
01:06:18,142 --> 01:06:19,476
Oh, I thought
you hated him.
1263
01:06:19,543 --> 01:06:21,978
Once you get past
the fleas,
he's very charming.
1264
01:06:22,046 --> 01:06:24,681
That's the way it goes,
isn't it?
1265
01:06:24,748 --> 01:06:28,185
First you think
they're not good enough,
1266
01:06:28,252 --> 01:06:30,254
then they grow on you,
and then...
1267
01:06:30,320 --> 01:06:32,622
You can't live
without them.
1268
01:06:32,689 --> 01:06:34,891
(SIGHS)
Ain't it the truth!
1269
01:06:36,893 --> 01:06:38,295
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
1270
01:06:41,298 --> 01:06:44,901
Look, I'm gonna
walk into town and
rent a car, okay?
1271
01:06:44,968 --> 01:06:46,870
This way I can get home
in a couple hours.
1272
01:06:46,936 --> 01:06:48,738
Whatever you want to do.
1273
01:06:48,805 --> 01:06:52,909
But do you really think
you ought to walk
10 miles in that?
1274
01:07:12,229 --> 01:07:13,863
(GASPS)
That's him!
1275
01:07:14,531 --> 01:07:16,266
That's my husband!
1276
01:07:17,467 --> 01:07:19,336
(SOBBING)
1277
01:07:31,548 --> 01:07:34,017
Oh, yeah?
Well, a merry Christmas
to you too,
1278
01:07:34,084 --> 01:07:36,453
you rude bimbo!
1279
01:07:36,520 --> 01:07:38,522
There's the
holiday spirit!
1280
01:07:38,588 --> 01:07:41,491
Samantha's office will
not give me the number
of where they are.
1281
01:07:41,558 --> 01:07:44,561
They're treating me
like I'm some
kind of wacko!
1282
01:07:46,163 --> 01:07:47,631
I know what
I'm going to do.
1283
01:07:47,697 --> 01:07:49,466
I'm going to give
Mr. Conti a call,
1284
01:07:49,533 --> 01:07:52,402
and I bet his secretary
will tell me where they are.
1285
01:07:52,469 --> 01:07:54,838
(PHONE RINGING)
1286
01:07:54,904 --> 01:07:57,107
(CHRISTMAS MUSIC PLAYING)
1287
01:07:59,008 --> 01:08:01,311
(SLURRING) Mr. Conti's office.
1288
01:08:02,546 --> 01:08:03,947
What cabin?
1289
01:08:05,649 --> 01:08:08,952
I'm sorry.
There must be
some mistake.
1290
01:08:09,018 --> 01:08:12,722
Mr. Conti is
in the Bahamas
with his family!
1291
01:08:12,789 --> 01:08:14,291
(GIGGLING)
1292
01:08:19,863 --> 01:08:24,000
James better hurry.
That bird's ready
to come out.
1293
01:08:24,067 --> 01:08:27,171
He doesn't need to hurry.
He's having an affair.
1294
01:08:28,138 --> 01:08:29,439
A what?
1295
01:08:29,506 --> 01:08:31,575
There is no meeting.
1296
01:08:31,641 --> 01:08:34,311
He and Ms. Fortune 500
1297
01:08:34,378 --> 01:08:37,181
are shacked up
in some cabin upstate.
1298
01:08:37,247 --> 01:08:41,618
While I'm here
peeling thousands
of little pearl onions
1299
01:08:41,685 --> 01:08:43,287
because he loves them,
1300
01:08:43,353 --> 01:08:46,223
he is having an affair
on Christmas Eve.
1301
01:08:46,290 --> 01:08:50,327
Oh, come on!
You don't believe that!
1302
01:08:50,394 --> 01:08:53,230
Mother, what would
you believe?
1303
01:08:53,297 --> 01:08:56,333
Sweetie, you remember
in the war
1304
01:08:56,400 --> 01:08:59,002
when your father's ship
was shelled...
Yes.
1305
01:08:59,068 --> 01:09:00,570
And he was
on that island...
1306
01:09:00,637 --> 01:09:02,972
For 17 days and
then he was rescued.
1307
01:09:03,039 --> 01:09:04,741
What does that
have to do with this?
1308
01:09:04,808 --> 01:09:06,476
What you don't know was...
1309
01:09:06,543 --> 01:09:11,715
He was on that island
alone with 13 U.S.O. girls.
1310
01:09:11,781 --> 01:09:15,285
God forbid it wasn't
Bob Hope, hmm?
1311
01:09:15,352 --> 01:09:17,754
Those girls,
they'd been around
the block.
1312
01:09:17,821 --> 01:09:21,491
Remember, your father was
a devastatingly handsome man.
1313
01:09:24,861 --> 01:09:26,663
Oh, that's beautiful.
1314
01:09:26,730 --> 01:09:27,997
(CRYING)
1315
01:09:30,667 --> 01:09:34,170
Go on, Mother.
What happened?
1316
01:09:34,238 --> 01:09:36,973
Nothing.
At least he swore
nothing happened.
1317
01:09:37,040 --> 01:09:39,309
Said they played
gin rummy the whole time.
1318
01:09:39,376 --> 01:09:40,744
You believed him?
1319
01:09:40,810 --> 01:09:42,045
Of course not!
1320
01:09:42,111 --> 01:09:43,513
Well, Mother!
1321
01:09:43,580 --> 01:09:44,914
Now wait!
1322
01:09:44,981 --> 01:09:48,252
Later I met
some of those girls.
It turned out...
1323
01:09:48,318 --> 01:09:51,288
That he hadn't played
gin rummy the whole time.
1324
01:09:51,355 --> 01:09:55,058
All he did the whole time
was talk about me.
1325
01:09:56,326 --> 01:09:58,595
And, I believed them.
1326
01:09:59,996 --> 01:10:04,033
Now, in your heart...
1327
01:10:04,100 --> 01:10:07,804
Do you really believe
James would cheat on you?
1328
01:10:21,050 --> 01:10:23,887
Well, James,
since we're stuck here,
1329
01:10:23,953 --> 01:10:25,722
might as well relax.
1330
01:10:28,358 --> 01:10:30,327
Isn't it great?
1331
01:10:30,394 --> 01:10:31,928
(ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYING)
1332
01:10:36,232 --> 01:10:37,701
This isn't good.
1333
01:10:37,767 --> 01:10:39,269
What?
1334
01:10:39,336 --> 01:10:42,171
Samantha, what is this?
This all seems
like some kind of...
1335
01:10:42,238 --> 01:10:43,973
Some sort of what?
1336
01:10:46,242 --> 01:10:47,511
Oh.
1337
01:10:48,812 --> 01:10:49,813
Oh!
1338
01:10:51,080 --> 01:10:53,383
I'm so embarrassed!
1339
01:10:53,450 --> 01:10:56,986
You think I've planned
all this as some sort of...
Oh, God!
1340
01:10:57,053 --> 01:10:59,723
Oh, God, I'm wrong!
Oh, man!
1341
01:10:59,789 --> 01:11:01,825
To think you would even
go for someone like me...
1342
01:11:01,891 --> 01:11:03,126
James, sit down.
1343
01:11:03,192 --> 01:11:05,562
I am so stupid!
1344
01:11:05,629 --> 01:11:08,197
You probably have
someone like
Prince Charles
1345
01:11:08,264 --> 01:11:10,133
in a condo waiting
for you somewhere.
1346
01:11:10,199 --> 01:11:11,701
(LAUGHING) Oh, no.
1347
01:11:12,502 --> 01:11:13,603
And, no,
1348
01:11:13,670 --> 01:11:15,472
I didn't have any plans
for tonight.
1349
01:11:15,539 --> 01:11:17,206
You're kidding?
1350
01:11:17,273 --> 01:11:19,843
You were actually going
to be alone for Christmas?
1351
01:11:19,909 --> 01:11:21,411
I'm used to it.
1352
01:11:21,478 --> 01:11:22,746
I can't believe it.
1353
01:11:22,812 --> 01:11:25,582
Really. When I was little,
I was at boarding school.
1354
01:11:25,649 --> 01:11:27,216
Where were your folks?
1355
01:11:27,283 --> 01:11:29,686
I don't know. Skiing.
1356
01:11:29,753 --> 01:11:31,755
Instead of being
with their kid?
1357
01:11:31,821 --> 01:11:33,557
James, listen.
1358
01:11:33,623 --> 01:11:36,560
Their parents did it to them,
they did it to me.
It was fine.
1359
01:11:36,626 --> 01:11:40,830
I also had a lot
of advantages.
I went to the best schools.
1360
01:11:40,897 --> 01:11:44,668
I could speak
four languages
by the time I was 15.
1361
01:11:44,734 --> 01:11:47,971
When I was 15,
I was flunking English.
1362
01:11:48,037 --> 01:11:51,140
I suppose I did
sometimes wonder about,
well, you know,
1363
01:11:51,207 --> 01:11:53,943
regular high school,
boys,
1364
01:11:55,178 --> 01:11:56,880
dances,
that kind of thing.
1365
01:11:56,946 --> 01:11:58,281
You didn't go
to dances?
1366
01:11:58,348 --> 01:11:59,583
No.
1367
01:11:59,649 --> 01:12:02,218
I actually
don't know how.
1368
01:12:02,285 --> 01:12:04,320
Ah, come on!
Everybody can dance.
1369
01:12:04,388 --> 01:12:05,855
Everybody cannot dance!
1370
01:12:05,922 --> 01:12:08,658
Yes, they can.
It's easy.
No, they cannot.
1371
01:12:09,793 --> 01:12:11,928
(SNIFFLING)
1372
01:12:11,995 --> 01:12:12,996
Mom?
1373
01:12:13,797 --> 01:12:15,298
What's wrong?
1374
01:12:15,365 --> 01:12:16,600
Nothing!
1375
01:12:16,666 --> 01:12:18,602
He's not coming back,
is he?
1376
01:12:18,668 --> 01:12:22,105
He's trying real hard
to get back tonight.
1377
01:12:22,171 --> 01:12:24,508
I knew it.
He's not coming back.
1378
01:12:24,574 --> 01:12:28,978
Let's go open up
some of those gifts
grandma and grandpa brought.
1379
01:12:29,045 --> 01:12:30,680
I'm sure Santa
wouldn't mind.
1380
01:12:30,747 --> 01:12:32,949
There is no Santa!
ROSIE: What?
1381
01:12:33,517 --> 01:12:35,218
There is no Santa.
1382
01:12:35,284 --> 01:12:37,020
Now stop that!
1383
01:12:37,086 --> 01:12:40,490
If there was,
wouldn't he let
Daddy be with us?
1384
01:12:40,557 --> 01:12:42,959
What's wrong?
Where's Daddy?
1385
01:12:43,026 --> 01:12:44,728
Oh, sweetie.
1386
01:12:44,794 --> 01:12:46,663
(CRYING) I want my daddy.
1387
01:12:46,730 --> 01:12:48,231
Christmas stinks.
1388
01:12:48,297 --> 01:12:51,167
Everybody, just hold it!
I think I have an idea.
1389
01:12:51,234 --> 01:12:53,837
ROSIE: Kids, let's open
some presents.
1390
01:12:53,903 --> 01:12:56,440
Look what's in this.
1391
01:12:56,506 --> 01:12:58,341
I don't want a present.
1392
01:12:58,408 --> 01:13:00,410
Ms. D'bonne's
office, please.
1393
01:13:00,477 --> 01:13:02,011
MIKEY: I wanna go watch TV.
1394
01:13:02,078 --> 01:13:06,015
Yes, hello.
I am calling from
Olympic Florist...
1395
01:13:06,082 --> 01:13:12,121
And I have 350 red roses
to deliver to Ms. D'bonne now.
1396
01:13:12,188 --> 01:13:14,323
MOLLIE: I need
the address, please.
1397
01:13:14,390 --> 01:13:18,862
They are coming from
a Mr. James Ubriccio...
1398
01:13:18,928 --> 01:13:22,666
Ubritch... Yeah, doll,
that's it. Uh-huh.
1399
01:13:23,500 --> 01:13:26,470
Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
1400
01:13:26,536 --> 01:13:29,973
Good. Thanks, doll,
and a merry Christmas
to you too.
1401
01:13:30,474 --> 01:13:32,141
Sucker!
1402
01:13:32,208 --> 01:13:34,110
All right, kids,
listen to Mommy.
1403
01:13:34,177 --> 01:13:38,014
Put on some very,
very warm clothes.
We're gonna take a trip.
1404
01:13:38,081 --> 01:13:40,784
Daddy, will you help me put
these presents in the car?
1405
01:13:40,850 --> 01:13:43,319
Ma, will you put
those onions
in some Tupperware?
1406
01:13:43,386 --> 01:13:45,722
Come on,
let's move it!
Move it!
1407
01:13:45,789 --> 01:13:47,657
Go! Move your
little butts!
1408
01:13:47,724 --> 01:13:50,326
Daddy won't come to Christmas,
Christmas is gonna
come to Daddy.
1409
01:13:50,393 --> 01:13:52,328
(HORN HONKING)
1410
01:14:04,140 --> 01:14:06,275
Rocks,
I don't feel so good.
1411
01:14:06,342 --> 01:14:09,579
Come on, it's fun!
It's chasing without
all that stupid running.
1412
01:14:09,646 --> 01:14:12,381
(GROANS) I'm going to lose
my Kibble 'n Bits.
1413
01:14:20,223 --> 01:14:22,358
(SNIFFING) Mmm, what's this?
1414
01:14:22,425 --> 01:14:25,061
Touch one of those presents,
you're gonna be hunting
gophers for dinner.
1415
01:14:39,275 --> 01:14:41,277
I smell treats!
That's fruitcake.
1416
01:14:41,344 --> 01:14:42,646
Rocks, I said no!
1417
01:14:44,313 --> 01:14:46,616
Mom! Look out!
What?
1418
01:14:53,356 --> 01:14:56,059
Don't worry, kids.
Mommy's just playing.
1419
01:14:58,094 --> 01:14:59,362
Hang on!
1420
01:15:01,097 --> 01:15:02,832
(MOLLIE SCREAMING)
1421
01:15:03,567 --> 01:15:05,268
Stop this thing!
1422
01:15:12,208 --> 01:15:13,509
(EXHALES)
1423
01:15:16,345 --> 01:15:19,015
Are you okay? Good.
Are you okay, honey?
1424
01:15:19,082 --> 01:15:21,618
Is everybody okay?
All right. Good.
1425
01:15:21,685 --> 01:15:24,220
Now, wasn't that fun?
1426
01:15:24,287 --> 01:15:25,555
No.
No.
1427
01:15:25,622 --> 01:15:27,523
No. All right.
1428
01:15:27,591 --> 01:15:30,459
Okay, tell you what
we're gonna do.
1429
01:15:31,828 --> 01:15:35,531
Mommy is gonna figure out
how to get us out of here.
1430
01:15:35,599 --> 01:15:36,633
I've got an idea.
1431
01:15:36,700 --> 01:15:37,734
What is that?
1432
01:15:37,801 --> 01:15:39,803
You push and I drive.
1433
01:15:39,869 --> 01:15:41,705
Really?
Yeah.
1434
01:15:41,771 --> 01:15:44,140
That's good.
Do you have your
driver's license with you?
1435
01:15:44,207 --> 01:15:45,942
No.
Okay, good try.
1436
01:15:46,009 --> 01:15:48,044
I know. I have an idea.
1437
01:15:48,111 --> 01:15:50,479
There's lots of great
pine cones out here.
1438
01:15:50,546 --> 01:15:54,350
I'm gonna gather up
pine cones, and while
I'm gathering pine cones...
1439
01:15:54,417 --> 01:15:55,852
I don't like pine cones.
1440
01:15:55,919 --> 01:15:57,821
You don't?
1441
01:15:57,887 --> 01:16:00,757
Okay, then I will
get you a stick.
1442
01:16:00,824 --> 01:16:04,193
You guys sing a song
and guard the presents, okay?
1443
01:16:04,260 --> 01:16:07,731
Sing a nice, loud
Christmas song so Mommy
can hear you.
1444
01:16:09,298 --> 01:16:12,769
KIDS: * Jingle bells,
Batman smells,
Robin laid an egg
1445
01:16:12,836 --> 01:16:16,606
* The Batmobile lost its wheel
and the Joker got away, hey
1446
01:16:16,673 --> 01:16:19,843
* Jingle bells,
Batman smells,
Robin laid an egg
1447
01:16:22,712 --> 01:16:24,681
Now what am I gonna do?
1448
01:16:30,920 --> 01:16:32,856
JULIE:
* Oh what fun it is to ride
and Joker did ballet, hey
1449
01:16:32,922 --> 01:16:35,458
MIKEY: Will you stop
mixing me up?
1450
01:16:35,524 --> 01:16:36,726
* Batman laid an egg
1451
01:16:36,793 --> 01:16:38,695
* Oh, what fun
it is to ride, hey
1452
01:16:38,762 --> 01:16:41,831
KIDS:
* Jingle bells, jingle bells,
Robin laid an egg
1453
01:16:41,898 --> 01:16:44,801
* Oh what fun it is to ride
in a one-horse open sleigh *
1454
01:16:48,171 --> 01:16:49,572
(SNARLING)
1455
01:16:55,679 --> 01:16:57,881
WOLF: Mmm-mmm,
meals on wheels.
1456
01:16:57,947 --> 01:17:00,049
Mommy found another doggy!
1457
01:17:00,116 --> 01:17:01,550
That's no dog, kid.
1458
01:17:01,617 --> 01:17:04,788
Hey there, mama.
On your way
to grandma's house?
1459
01:17:05,488 --> 01:17:07,223
Hey, you! Beat it!
1460
01:17:10,359 --> 01:17:13,196
Ooh, I love
the smell of fear.
1461
01:17:13,262 --> 01:17:14,931
Nice, nice wolf.
1462
01:17:16,332 --> 01:17:17,967
I won't hurt you.
1463
01:17:20,336 --> 01:17:21,671
(WHISPERS) Nice wolf.
1464
01:17:23,940 --> 01:17:25,441
I like wolves.
1465
01:17:29,679 --> 01:17:32,048
Let me out of here!
Let me out!
1466
01:17:32,115 --> 01:17:33,649
Nice wolf.
1467
01:17:34,851 --> 01:17:36,119
Come on!
1468
01:17:41,157 --> 01:17:45,428
Look, just leave the lady
alone unless you wanna get
spayed the hard way!
1469
01:17:45,494 --> 01:17:49,799
Ooh, he talks the talk.
But can he walk the walk?
1470
01:17:51,600 --> 01:17:53,870
Back off, city boy!
This ain't your business.
1471
01:17:53,937 --> 01:17:56,740
The hell it ain't!
That's my family.
1472
01:17:56,806 --> 01:18:00,744
Kids, remember when Mommy
told you the story about
Peter and the Wolf?
1473
01:18:00,810 --> 01:18:02,445
Well, there's the wolf...
1474
01:18:02,511 --> 01:18:06,115
And where is that crazy Peter
when you need him?
1475
01:18:08,885 --> 01:18:10,653
(SNARLING)
1476
01:18:11,654 --> 01:18:12,989
(BARKING)
1477
01:18:19,095 --> 01:18:20,463
Rocks!
1478
01:18:31,374 --> 01:18:32,708
Rocks!
1479
01:18:47,656 --> 01:18:49,692
Rocks! Oh, no! No!
1480
01:18:54,563 --> 01:18:56,332
Rip his throat out!
1481
01:18:58,367 --> 01:19:01,004
WOLF: Ow! My tail!
1482
01:19:01,070 --> 01:19:02,772
ROCKS: Never mess with
a street dog, you wuss!
1483
01:19:02,839 --> 01:19:04,140
(WOLF YELPING)
1484
01:19:04,207 --> 01:19:05,741
(ALL CHEERING)
1485
01:19:08,277 --> 01:19:09,345
(WHINING)
1486
01:19:09,412 --> 01:19:10,814
Oh, no!
1487
01:19:14,717 --> 01:19:18,154
(GASPS)
Rocks, you're hurt!
Oh, look at your paws.
1488
01:19:18,221 --> 01:19:20,389
And your little ears
and your neck.
1489
01:19:20,456 --> 01:19:22,391
What did that animal
do to you?
1490
01:19:22,458 --> 01:19:23,559
Aw, it's nothing.
1491
01:19:23,626 --> 01:19:24,760
Oh, sweetheart.
1492
01:19:24,828 --> 01:19:27,163
Sweetheart?
Oh, baby!
1493
01:19:27,230 --> 01:19:28,497
Yeah!
1494
01:19:30,533 --> 01:19:32,201
(SNIFFING)
Hey, I smell kid's dad.
1495
01:19:32,268 --> 01:19:34,103
Up this way.
You mean the master?
1496
01:19:34,170 --> 01:19:36,873
You're hurt.
I want you to come back
to the car.
1497
01:19:36,940 --> 01:19:38,307
We gotta get
these guys help.
1498
01:19:38,374 --> 01:19:39,876
Then I'm going to go too.
1499
01:19:39,943 --> 01:19:41,310
No, you're
a house dog.
1500
01:19:41,377 --> 01:19:43,312
I've still got
my animal instincts.
1501
01:19:43,379 --> 01:19:45,849
All right, you go back
that way and get help.
1502
01:19:45,915 --> 01:19:46,983
All right.
1503
01:19:47,050 --> 01:19:48,717
Uh, which way?
1504
01:19:48,784 --> 01:19:51,487
You gotta sniff
for people.
1505
01:19:51,554 --> 01:19:54,523
Uh, sniff?
Stick your nose
in the air and suck.
1506
01:19:54,590 --> 01:19:57,927
Uh-oh. Mommy's
gotta get the dogs
before they run away.
1507
01:19:57,994 --> 01:19:59,695
Take care of yourself.
1508
01:19:59,762 --> 01:20:02,731
(NERVOUS LAUGH)
Don't worry about me.
Sniff?
1509
01:20:02,798 --> 01:20:04,667
(SNORTS)
No, that's snort.
1510
01:20:06,002 --> 01:20:07,570
Rocks! Here boy!
1511
01:20:07,636 --> 01:20:09,705
(WHISTLING)
Come on, guys!
1512
01:20:09,772 --> 01:20:11,007
Rocks!
Daphne!
1513
01:20:11,074 --> 01:20:12,375
Where'd they go?
1514
01:20:12,441 --> 01:20:14,710
I don't know.
Maybe to the bathroom.
1515
01:20:14,777 --> 01:20:17,446
They should've gone to
the bathroom before we left.
1516
01:20:17,513 --> 01:20:19,615
Right, Mommy?
That's right.
1517
01:20:20,383 --> 01:20:21,784
Rocks, come back!
1518
01:20:21,851 --> 01:20:22,952
Daphne!
1519
01:20:23,019 --> 01:20:25,588
Let's get back in the car.
He'll come back.
1520
01:20:25,654 --> 01:20:27,323
Come back, girl.
1521
01:20:27,390 --> 01:20:30,359
I'll let you open a present.
You can pick whatever present
you want.
1522
01:20:30,426 --> 01:20:32,061
MIKEY:
But Rocks is hurt!
1523
01:20:32,128 --> 01:20:34,230
MOLLIE: Honey,
he'll be fine.
1524
01:20:35,298 --> 01:20:37,833
Six, seven, eight.
1525
01:20:37,901 --> 01:20:41,037
And slow,
quick, quick, slow.
1526
01:20:41,770 --> 01:20:43,672
Quick, quick, slow.
1527
01:20:43,739 --> 01:20:45,541
Quick, quick, slow.
1528
01:20:45,608 --> 01:20:47,676
Quick, quick, slow.
Good.
1529
01:20:47,743 --> 01:20:49,712
Quick, quick, slow.
Good!
1530
01:20:52,015 --> 01:20:53,782
Excellent!
Good.
1531
01:21:08,064 --> 01:21:09,165
See, you can dance!
1532
01:21:09,232 --> 01:21:11,134
But how do we do it
like this?
1533
01:21:11,200 --> 01:21:13,169
Just the same way.
1534
01:21:14,537 --> 01:21:17,974
Uh, slow,
quick, quick, slow.
1535
01:21:18,041 --> 01:21:20,243
BOTH: Quick, quick, slow.
1536
01:21:20,309 --> 01:21:22,311
BOTH: Quick, quick, slow.
1537
01:21:22,378 --> 01:21:25,982
Okay, I think I'm sniffing.
I'm definitely inhaling,
and I'm getting nothing.
1538
01:21:26,049 --> 01:21:29,585
I'm just an inbred washout!
Oh! People!
1539
01:21:32,655 --> 01:21:34,857
I did it!
I can sniff!
1540
01:21:34,924 --> 01:21:38,161
I am not a poodle.
I am a wild, marauding beast!
1541
01:21:39,362 --> 01:21:41,830
Move it!
My masters need help!
1542
01:22:00,783 --> 01:22:02,351
(SCREAMS)
1543
01:22:02,418 --> 01:22:04,720
Ow!
The phone is out,
huh?
1544
01:22:04,787 --> 01:22:05,888
You are unbelievable!
1545
01:22:05,955 --> 01:22:08,257
How dare you
treat me like that!
1546
01:22:08,324 --> 01:22:10,726
Easy. You're
a lousy human being.
1547
01:22:13,329 --> 01:22:15,198
Listen to me, James.
1548
01:22:15,264 --> 01:22:18,367
You are a very
impressive man.
1549
01:22:18,434 --> 01:22:21,370
Over the past few months,
I have watched you bloom.
1550
01:22:21,437 --> 01:22:23,706
You deserve better
than some...
1551
01:22:23,772 --> 01:22:25,474
Frumpy little housewife,
1552
01:22:25,541 --> 01:22:29,212
who doesn't even have
the resourcefulness to
find herself a decent job.
1553
01:22:29,278 --> 01:22:31,614
(ROCKS BARKING)
1554
01:22:31,680 --> 01:22:34,783
She's smart enough
to find me here.
That's our dog, Rocks.
1555
01:22:34,850 --> 01:22:36,352
(LAUGHS) Yeah!
1556
01:22:38,988 --> 01:22:40,889
(LAUGHING) Hey, Rocks!
All right.
1557
01:22:40,956 --> 01:22:43,359
ROCKS: Hey, big guy.
Hey, pal, give me paw.
1558
01:22:43,426 --> 01:22:46,729
What happened?
Ooh, ooh!
Not so rough.
1559
01:22:46,795 --> 01:22:49,532
ROCKS: Whoa!
Is she in heat or what?
1560
01:22:53,202 --> 01:22:56,639
If you walk out that door,
I will personally guarantee
1561
01:22:56,705 --> 01:22:59,175
that you never fly for
a reputable company
1562
01:22:59,242 --> 01:23:01,310
for the rest of
your pathetic...
1563
01:23:01,377 --> 01:23:02,378
(URINATING)
1564
01:23:03,979 --> 01:23:05,748
Oh!
ROCKS:
How do you like that, huh?
1565
01:23:05,814 --> 01:23:07,683
That'll cool you off.
1566
01:23:09,452 --> 01:23:10,886
Come on, Rocks.
Let's go.
1567
01:23:10,953 --> 01:23:12,555
ROCKS: Good shot, huh?
1568
01:23:14,023 --> 01:23:15,058
Bye.
1569
01:23:15,124 --> 01:23:16,492
(SCREAMING)
1570
01:23:19,628 --> 01:23:23,266
(GASPS)
It's just a hat.
1571
01:23:23,332 --> 01:23:26,569
It's a hat?
Let's put it on.
1572
01:23:26,635 --> 01:23:29,638
Whew! I think
it goes a different way.
1573
01:23:29,705 --> 01:23:31,074
Let's see!
1574
01:23:31,140 --> 01:23:33,109
(GASPS)
Oh, you look so pretty!
1575
01:23:33,176 --> 01:23:36,179
Oh! Look at that face!
1576
01:23:36,245 --> 01:23:38,781
Mikey, you want
to open another one?
1577
01:23:40,049 --> 01:23:41,550
It's probably
more clothes.
1578
01:23:41,617 --> 01:23:43,819
You know what?
1579
01:23:43,886 --> 01:23:47,456
You're lucky we gave you
boring things, otherwise
you'd be freezing right now.
1580
01:23:49,325 --> 01:23:50,993
(DAPHNE BARKING)
1581
01:23:53,129 --> 01:23:54,730
Is that Daphne?
1582
01:23:56,865 --> 01:24:00,803
(GASPS) My God!
My dog is a genius!
1583
01:24:00,869 --> 01:24:03,272
Yeah!
MIKEY:
Way to go, Daphne!
1584
01:24:03,339 --> 01:24:06,041
No need for applause.
Just throw treats.
1585
01:24:07,110 --> 01:24:09,245
ROCKS: Come on!
We're almost there.
1586
01:24:10,579 --> 01:24:12,581
JAMES: Okay, Rocks,
where are they?
1587
01:24:12,648 --> 01:24:16,252
Are we getting close?
Are we? Right.
1588
01:24:16,319 --> 01:24:17,653
What are you
gonna say to me?
1589
01:24:17,720 --> 01:24:19,255
"Yeah, James,
they're just up the road
1590
01:24:19,322 --> 01:24:22,791
"about a quarter of a mile,
just past the 7-Eleven."
1591
01:24:23,492 --> 01:24:25,628
Rocks, this way!
1592
01:24:25,694 --> 01:24:28,631
Are you gonna trust that
dinky bulb in the middle
of your face or my nose?
1593
01:24:28,697 --> 01:24:29,798
Come on!
1594
01:24:29,865 --> 01:24:32,034
All right.
Hope you're right.
1595
01:24:38,107 --> 01:24:40,243
Mollie! Mollie!
1596
01:24:42,578 --> 01:24:44,313
Oh, God!
Mollie!
1597
01:24:46,715 --> 01:24:48,851
ROCKS: They're gone?
I can't believe it!
1598
01:24:48,917 --> 01:24:51,554
Look on the floor.
I left them here.
1599
01:24:55,391 --> 01:24:56,959
(ROCKS WHINING)
1600
01:25:05,134 --> 01:25:06,502
Come on in.
1601
01:25:09,705 --> 01:25:12,575
There's some cots
in the back
you could use.
1602
01:25:12,641 --> 01:25:14,277
No, thank you.
We're not
gonna sleep here.
1603
01:25:14,343 --> 01:25:17,012
We have to get a hold
of my husband.
1604
01:25:17,079 --> 01:25:19,215
No one's going anywhere
tonight, ma'am.
1605
01:25:19,282 --> 01:25:22,518
Just hunker down here.
We'll try and get out
in the morning.
1606
01:25:22,585 --> 01:25:25,087
We have to go tonight.
This is Christmas Eve.
1607
01:25:25,154 --> 01:25:26,489
I'm sorry.
1608
01:25:28,090 --> 01:25:31,093
If it's any consolation,
I've got cookies and eggnog.
1609
01:25:31,160 --> 01:25:32,761
Help yourselves.
1610
01:25:34,129 --> 01:25:35,464
Thank you.
1611
01:25:37,166 --> 01:25:38,434
(SIGHS)
1612
01:25:50,679 --> 01:25:53,182
I'm sorry, you guys.
1613
01:25:53,249 --> 01:25:56,819
I didn't mean to get us
stuck out here tonight,
1614
01:25:56,885 --> 01:25:59,255
without our daddy.
Sorry.
1615
01:25:59,322 --> 01:26:01,657
How is Santa
gonna find us here?
1616
01:26:04,560 --> 01:26:06,962
Don't worry.
He has special radar.
1617
01:26:15,704 --> 01:26:17,005
Merry Christmas, Mom.
1618
01:26:17,072 --> 01:26:18,607
Merry Christmas, Mom.
1619
01:26:19,508 --> 01:26:21,109
Merry Christmas.
1620
01:26:33,856 --> 01:26:36,992
WOLF 1: Man, he was big
and jumped me from behind!
WOLF 2: We'll find him.
1621
01:26:37,059 --> 01:26:39,895
Wait! I think
I'm picking up
on something.
1622
01:26:39,962 --> 01:26:41,163
(SNIFFING)
1623
01:26:41,230 --> 01:26:43,332
WOLVES: Fresh meat!
1624
01:26:48,771 --> 01:26:49,805
(WOLF SNARLING)
1625
01:26:49,872 --> 01:26:50,906
Uh-oh!
1626
01:26:50,973 --> 01:26:52,941
Yeah, that's the guy!
1627
01:26:53,008 --> 01:26:54,410
Damn!
1628
01:26:54,477 --> 01:26:56,745
Bit me hard!
He had friends.
He ain't so big.
1629
01:26:56,812 --> 01:26:59,248
The fur's gonna fly!
1630
01:26:59,315 --> 01:27:01,684
Run! Save yourself!
I'll take care of these guys.
1631
01:27:01,750 --> 01:27:03,852
You take care
of nobody, chump.
1632
01:27:03,919 --> 01:27:05,654
Uh-oh.
1633
01:27:05,721 --> 01:27:06,855
It's show time.
1634
01:27:06,922 --> 01:27:09,292
Your funeral!
Your mama!
1635
01:27:09,358 --> 01:27:10,759
(WOLVES SNARLING)
1636
01:27:11,860 --> 01:27:13,562
(PAGER BEEPING)
1637
01:27:26,809 --> 01:27:30,078
(WHISPERING) Mmm, honey,
let's go to bed now.
1638
01:27:30,746 --> 01:27:32,681
I'm not sleepy.
1639
01:27:32,748 --> 01:27:35,751
I know.
But you know what?
1640
01:27:35,818 --> 01:27:39,688
The sooner we go to sleep,
the sooner Christmas
will come.
1641
01:27:42,024 --> 01:27:45,828
* When the road gets dark
1642
01:27:48,263 --> 01:27:52,267
* And you can no longer see
1643
01:27:54,002 --> 01:27:57,973
* Just let my love
throw a spark
1644
01:27:59,074 --> 01:28:00,208
Santa?
1645
01:28:00,275 --> 01:28:04,713
* And have
a little faith in me
1646
01:28:04,780 --> 01:28:08,116
* And have
a little faith in me
1647
01:28:11,119 --> 01:28:14,923
* And have
a little faith in me
1648
01:28:17,125 --> 01:28:19,962
Mom!
Mom, come over here.
1649
01:28:20,028 --> 01:28:23,466
(WHISPERS) What?
I think it's Santa.
1650
01:28:23,532 --> 01:28:27,670
* Have a little faith in me
1651
01:28:27,736 --> 01:28:29,405
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
1652
01:28:31,139 --> 01:28:34,543
* When your secret heart
1653
01:28:34,610 --> 01:28:35,878
Hello?
1654
01:28:39,415 --> 01:28:40,883
Oh, man!
1655
01:28:41,817 --> 01:28:43,586
Merry Christmas, honey.
1656
01:28:43,652 --> 01:28:45,053
* Come here, darling
1657
01:28:45,120 --> 01:28:47,255
* From a whisper start
1658
01:28:49,792 --> 01:28:52,928
* To have
a little faith in me *
1659
01:28:53,696 --> 01:28:54,897
Daddy!
1660
01:28:55,698 --> 01:28:57,533
Daddy!
Hi, Julie.
1661
01:29:04,239 --> 01:29:06,041
Dad?
1662
01:29:06,108 --> 01:29:07,476
Where's Rocks?
1663
01:29:07,543 --> 01:29:10,579
You wouldn't believe it!
We ran into these wolves.
1664
01:29:11,747 --> 01:29:14,417
We actually
got attacked
by wolves.
1665
01:29:14,483 --> 01:29:17,453
DAPHNE: Oh, no!
And Rocks came
to my defense.
1666
01:29:17,520 --> 01:29:21,657
One of the wolves
chomped on my beeper.
Look at it.
1667
01:29:21,724 --> 01:29:24,026
And they all
totally spazzed out!
1668
01:29:24,092 --> 01:29:26,161
Bunch of wimps!
Rocks!
1669
01:29:26,829 --> 01:29:27,930
Rocks?
1670
01:29:27,996 --> 01:29:30,533
Hey, kid,
it's great to see ya!
1671
01:29:31,500 --> 01:29:34,202
DAPHNE: Oh, Rocks,
how did you find us?
1672
01:29:34,269 --> 01:29:36,639
I just followed
your scent.
Oh!
1673
01:29:36,705 --> 01:29:40,142
And you smell beautiful,
Daphne! Oh, honey pie!
1674
01:29:40,208 --> 01:29:41,444
Oh, pumpkin butt!
1675
01:29:41,510 --> 01:29:44,246
Stop it, Rocks.
Not in front of the kids.
1676
01:29:44,312 --> 01:29:47,716
James,
before the wolves...
1677
01:29:47,783 --> 01:29:49,084
What were you doing?
1678
01:29:50,285 --> 01:29:51,787
Getting fired.
1679
01:29:54,657 --> 01:29:56,024
Thank God!
1680
01:29:58,093 --> 01:30:00,896
Mom, can Rocks
stay with us now?
1681
01:30:00,963 --> 01:30:03,732
Oh...
Honey, have a heart.
1682
01:30:03,799 --> 01:30:06,602
If it weren't for Rocks,
we wouldn't be
together tonight.
1683
01:30:06,669 --> 01:30:08,070
I might even be dead.
1684
01:30:08,136 --> 01:30:09,938
I know, that's why...
1685
01:30:10,005 --> 01:30:12,908
So what if he's
not the smartest dog
in the world.
1686
01:30:12,975 --> 01:30:15,010
Who cares if he can
sit down?
1687
01:30:15,077 --> 01:30:16,111
ROCKS: I can sit down.
1688
01:30:16,178 --> 01:30:19,047
Or if he could... Beg.
1689
01:30:19,114 --> 01:30:20,483
Beg's easy. Look.
1690
01:30:20,549 --> 01:30:23,619
Who needs a beggar
in the family...
Or to lie down?
1691
01:30:23,686 --> 01:30:26,622
The point is,
he is still a great dog.
1692
01:30:27,422 --> 01:30:28,991
He stays.
What?
1693
01:30:29,057 --> 01:30:31,393
He stays!
Really?
1694
01:30:31,460 --> 01:30:33,662
JAMES: Hey, Mike,
do you hear that?
1695
01:30:34,963 --> 01:30:36,765
I'm gonna stay!
1696
01:30:36,832 --> 01:30:39,067
RANGER: Hey, guys,
1697
01:30:39,134 --> 01:30:41,937
I'm picking up
something weird over here.
1698
01:30:44,039 --> 01:30:45,407
(STATIC BUZZING)
1699
01:30:46,108 --> 01:30:47,643
(GARBLED VOICES)
1700
01:30:47,710 --> 01:30:49,411
(BELLS JINGLING)
1701
01:30:49,478 --> 01:30:50,879
Hey, what is that?
1702
01:30:50,946 --> 01:30:52,314
Come here.
1703
01:30:53,415 --> 01:30:55,283
Is that sleigh bells?
1704
01:30:57,452 --> 01:31:00,956
MAN: Ho, ho, ho!
Merry Christmas!
1705
01:31:01,757 --> 01:31:02,991
Whoa!
1706
01:31:03,058 --> 01:31:04,326
Told you
he was real!
1707
01:31:04,392 --> 01:31:06,328
I knew he was real.
You did not.
1708
01:31:06,394 --> 01:31:09,064
I knew the whole time.
You did not.
1709
01:31:09,131 --> 01:31:13,168
She kissed you!
I hate my sister!
1710
01:31:13,235 --> 01:31:14,970
MIKEY: Get the
cooties away!
JAMES: Let's go to bed.
1711
01:31:15,037 --> 01:31:17,305
JULIE: I don't want
to go to bed.
MOLLIE: It's so exciting.
1712
01:31:19,642 --> 01:31:21,610
MOLLIE: He's right above
our head. Can't you feel it?
1713
01:31:35,891 --> 01:31:38,460
(IT'S CHRISTMAS, C'EST NOEL
PLAYING)
1714
01:32:09,191 --> 01:32:10,225
* Look
1715
01:32:10,292 --> 01:32:12,795
* There is
a white blanket over us
1716
01:32:12,861 --> 01:32:17,032
* A fire place
and the Christmas tree
1717
01:32:17,099 --> 01:32:19,401
* Thousand of
little lights above us
1718
01:32:20,969 --> 01:32:24,840
* And I am feeling
so so happy
1719
01:32:24,907 --> 01:32:27,509
* Tonight's the night for us,
the children
1720
01:32:28,811 --> 01:32:32,047
* To get the present
we've been dreamin' of
1721
01:32:32,114 --> 01:32:35,651
* It's Christmas,
c'est Noel
1722
01:32:35,718 --> 01:32:39,655
* C'est Noel,
it's Christmas
1723
01:32:39,722 --> 01:32:43,491
* It's Christmas,
c'est Noel
1724
01:32:43,558 --> 01:32:47,162
* C'est Noel,
it's Christmas
1725
01:32:48,530 --> 01:32:50,799
* Then you feel something
up in the air
1726
01:32:52,234 --> 01:32:56,038
* A super nice feeling
of holiness
1727
01:32:56,104 --> 01:32:59,241
* And for us all
it's time to share
1728
01:32:59,307 --> 01:33:02,544
* With everyone
our happiness
1729
01:33:02,611 --> 01:33:03,846
* And do you know what?
1730
01:33:03,912 --> 01:33:07,549
* Tonight's the night for us,
the children
1731
01:33:07,616 --> 01:33:10,953
* To get the present
we've been dreamin' of
1732
01:33:11,019 --> 01:33:14,790
* It's Christmas,
c'est Noel
1733
01:33:14,857 --> 01:33:18,493
* C'est Noel,
it's Christmas
1734
01:33:18,560 --> 01:33:22,564
* It's Christmas,
c'est Noel
1735
01:33:22,631 --> 01:33:26,501
* C'est Noel,
it's Christmas
1736
01:33:26,568 --> 01:33:30,305
* It's Christmas,
c'est Noel
1737
01:33:30,372 --> 01:33:34,142
* C'est Noel,
it's Christmas
1738
01:33:58,333 --> 01:34:00,202
* Come on, everybody
1739
01:34:00,268 --> 01:34:02,170
* Dancin' under
the Christmas tree
1740
01:34:02,237 --> 01:34:03,939
* Don't you want
to just party with me
1741
01:34:04,006 --> 01:34:05,974
* Come on now everyone
1742
01:34:06,041 --> 01:34:07,976
* Come on, y'all,
time to sing
1743
01:34:08,043 --> 01:34:10,212
* What a joy
that would bring
1744
01:34:10,278 --> 01:34:11,914
* Christmas time
1745
01:34:11,980 --> 01:34:13,515
* Time to have fun,
time to dance
1746
01:34:13,581 --> 01:34:17,219
* It's Christmas,
c'est Noel
1747
01:34:17,285 --> 01:34:21,089
* C'est Noel,
it's Christmas
1748
01:34:21,156 --> 01:34:24,893
* It's Christmas,
c'est Noel
1749
01:34:24,960 --> 01:34:28,831
* C'est Noel,
it's Christmas
1750
01:34:44,612 --> 01:34:48,450
* It's Christmas,
c'est Noel
1751
01:34:48,516 --> 01:34:52,320
* C'est Noel,
it's Christmas
1752
01:34:52,387 --> 01:34:56,191
* It's Christmas,
c'est Noel
1753
01:34:56,258 --> 01:35:00,062
* C'est Noel,
it's Christmas
1754
01:35:00,128 --> 01:35:01,864
* C'est Noel
119995
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