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1
00:01:04,360 --> 00:01:10,040
My name is... My name is...
2
00:01:10,040 --> 00:01:16,560
Well, my name isn't important.
3
00:01:19,440 --> 00:01:22,060
It's important that this is clear.
4
00:01:24,860 --> 00:01:30,920
I'm sure my name will be out there, but
you didn't hear it from me.
5
00:01:34,090 --> 00:01:35,570
You didn't hear it from me.
6
00:01:38,410 --> 00:01:44,870
I didn't start doing this to be known,
to be famous or infamous.
7
00:01:48,550 --> 00:01:51,270
I didn't start out doing this for any
reason, really.
8
00:01:55,610 --> 00:01:57,110
It just sort of happened.
9
00:04:00,840 --> 00:04:01,840
He was.
10
00:04:04,460 --> 00:04:05,600
He was.
11
00:04:07,580 --> 00:04:08,900
He was nothing.
12
00:04:11,400 --> 00:04:12,820
No family.
13
00:04:13,940 --> 00:04:15,320
No friends.
14
00:04:17,380 --> 00:04:18,380
Alone.
15
00:04:20,720 --> 00:04:21,720
Lonely.
16
00:04:24,060 --> 00:04:25,620
Looking for something.
17
00:04:29,610 --> 00:04:32,070
looking for something he would never
find.
18
00:04:36,910 --> 00:04:38,970
I kept him intact.
19
00:04:41,690 --> 00:04:46,730
He would be someone known for something.
20
00:05:18,700 --> 00:05:19,740
He was the first.
21
00:05:22,560 --> 00:05:24,220
I went a bit overboard.
22
00:05:26,360 --> 00:05:27,820
Can't be too careful.
23
00:05:30,560 --> 00:05:32,480
The killing was the easy part.
24
00:05:35,040 --> 00:05:36,600
Anticlimactic in so many ways.
25
00:05:40,180 --> 00:05:41,840
Which is not there anymore.
26
00:08:09,219 --> 00:08:12,520
I think I was preoccupied with the
cleanup the whole time.
27
00:08:15,140 --> 00:08:19,520
I couldn't... I couldn't be there in the
moment with him.
28
00:08:22,120 --> 00:08:23,420
I'm sorry about that.
29
00:08:25,940 --> 00:08:27,960
That I wasn't there with him in the end.
30
00:09:37,520 --> 00:09:39,320
From the beginning I filmed them.
31
00:09:41,160 --> 00:09:47,260
I wanted a record, evident,
32
00:09:47,540 --> 00:09:50,480
of all of them.
33
00:09:54,360 --> 00:09:59,000
I don't trust my memories, or rather
I...
34
00:09:59,000 --> 00:10:05,760
They were not reliable.
35
00:10:07,520 --> 00:10:08,520
Relatable.
36
00:10:10,340 --> 00:10:11,700
Not scientific.
37
00:10:13,280 --> 00:10:14,840
Or specific enough.
38
00:10:19,100 --> 00:10:20,100
A moment.
39
00:10:23,680 --> 00:10:24,840
Just a moment.
40
00:10:28,060 --> 00:10:29,760
Of them really alive.
41
00:10:32,120 --> 00:10:34,520
A record playing over and over again.
42
00:10:47,020 --> 00:10:53,400
When you travel a lot and get used to
it,
43
00:10:53,480 --> 00:10:58,620
get used to the lulling and numbness of
being flung about,
44
00:10:58,920 --> 00:11:09,660
get
45
00:11:09,660 --> 00:11:14,100
used to the differences so much.
46
00:11:20,200 --> 00:11:24,240
Get used to the differences so much that
you can see through them to the sameness
47
00:11:24,240 --> 00:11:25,420
of everything and everyone.
48
00:11:29,180 --> 00:11:30,180
It's perfect.
49
00:11:32,120 --> 00:11:38,300
And all the talk, no matter what
language it is, you just talk,
50
00:11:38,500 --> 00:11:40,520
talk, talk, talk.
51
00:11:41,940 --> 00:11:43,340
Blah, blah, blah.
52
00:11:48,570 --> 00:11:49,690
you can see the special ones.
53
00:11:54,130 --> 00:11:56,830
And I don't mean special like touched or
mental.
54
00:11:58,830 --> 00:12:00,370
More otherworldly.
55
00:12:02,450 --> 00:12:04,910
They come out at you through the mud and
fog.
56
00:12:07,310 --> 00:12:09,090
They barely touch the ground.
57
00:12:11,110 --> 00:12:14,070
I just dropped here with little regard
for gravity.
58
00:12:16,810 --> 00:12:19,930
ready to ascend or descend at any
moment.
59
00:12:22,650 --> 00:12:26,090
Like God, work that through to us.
60
00:19:19,020 --> 00:19:21,320
Thank you.
61
00:20:47,210 --> 00:20:49,750
Good morning, ladies and gentlemen.
62
00:20:51,890 --> 00:20:55,950
It's 10 minutes past 9.
63
00:20:56,310 --> 00:21:02,210
Our train is 35 minutes delayed. We
arrive
64
00:21:02,210 --> 00:21:06,090
Paris at 10 o'clock.
65
00:22:42,700 --> 00:22:44,920
Yeah, but I didn't notice you were
climbing. Really?
66
00:22:45,220 --> 00:22:47,700
Yeah, you were on the canals. Don't pull
the bottle, it's going to fall.
67
00:22:48,680 --> 00:22:50,020
You were on the canals, it's funny.
68
00:22:50,360 --> 00:22:52,260
What? You were on the canals. Yeah.
69
00:22:53,660 --> 00:22:54,619
That's how you climb.
70
00:22:54,620 --> 00:22:56,720
There, we're going to put... Can you see
the bars?
71
00:22:57,160 --> 00:22:59,640
Yeah. We're going to put them at the top
level. There, we're going to... There,
72
00:22:59,680 --> 00:23:03,040
we're going to put them at the top
level.
73
00:23:03,240 --> 00:23:05,100
And there, we're going to... I can't do
this with a trampoline.
74
00:23:16,590 --> 00:23:22,310
having a locked box, a beautifully
smooth
75
00:23:22,310 --> 00:23:28,410
carved box with everything locked
inside,
76
00:23:28,730 --> 00:23:35,570
having it with me, knowing it was always
77
00:23:35,570 --> 00:23:39,650
there in the back of my mind, tucked
away inside.
78
00:23:45,550 --> 00:23:46,990
Shutting out the outside world.
79
00:23:51,250 --> 00:23:54,270
I could shut my eyes and see it floating
there in the darkness.
80
00:23:56,770 --> 00:23:57,770
Safely waiting.
81
00:24:00,830 --> 00:24:02,390
The relief I would feel.
82
00:24:02,810 --> 00:24:06,570
The incredible release when I took hold
of it.
83
00:24:14,570 --> 00:24:19,710
if only for a moment, for one person,
just a moment.
84
00:24:22,530 --> 00:24:27,750
Then gather them back all in, carefully,
meticulously,
85
00:24:27,950 --> 00:24:33,070
before snapping it shut again.
86
00:24:36,910 --> 00:24:38,150
Control and release.
87
00:24:40,270 --> 00:24:41,690
Control and release.
88
00:24:44,620 --> 00:24:45,620
animal instincts.
89
00:24:47,900 --> 00:24:49,860
The calm that comes with control.
90
00:24:53,200 --> 00:24:56,340
The white heat that overtakes us when we
let it all go.
91
00:27:27,699 --> 00:27:29,120
Thank you.
92
00:35:30,000 --> 00:35:36,820
Don't go looking for reasons or
incidents from my childhood that
93
00:35:36,820 --> 00:35:37,960
might have led to this.
94
00:35:41,100 --> 00:35:47,600
Whatever you might dig up, whatever
motivations
95
00:35:47,600 --> 00:35:51,320
or meanings you might think you find,
96
00:35:51,620 --> 00:35:58,160
whatever comfort you might get in
figuring it all out,
97
00:36:01,040 --> 00:36:04,480
I'm telling you right now, you're wrong.
98
00:36:06,940 --> 00:36:13,520
There is no motivation, no meaning, no
99
00:36:13,520 --> 00:36:17,300
reason, and no comfort.
100
00:36:21,920 --> 00:36:24,680
I take full responsibility for my
actions.
101
00:36:27,640 --> 00:36:29,660
But there was no master plan.
102
00:36:33,800 --> 00:36:36,560
I know looking back, there seems to have
been.
103
00:36:39,000 --> 00:36:41,780
And it's always tempting to connect the
dots.
104
00:36:43,020 --> 00:36:46,240
To create some kind of order.
105
00:36:50,920 --> 00:36:51,920
Say yes.
106
00:36:53,460 --> 00:36:54,460
Yes.
107
00:36:57,200 --> 00:36:58,720
Okay, say no.
108
00:36:59,480 --> 00:37:00,480
No.
109
00:46:13,100 --> 00:46:14,520
I should destroy these tapes.
110
00:46:16,000 --> 00:46:21,600
I sound like that terrible author who
always writes about killing young boys
111
00:46:21,600 --> 00:46:26,880
and having sex with their bodies, of
getting under their skin,
112
00:46:27,120 --> 00:46:34,000
of how profound it all is,
113
00:46:34,100 --> 00:46:36,160
or some such nonsense.
114
00:46:38,860 --> 00:46:41,700
It is so obvious that he has never
killed anyone.
115
00:46:43,240 --> 00:46:44,660
Never even come close.
116
00:46:47,980 --> 00:46:49,120
It's all pretend.
117
00:46:52,560 --> 00:46:54,200
I made it all up.
118
00:46:57,880 --> 00:46:59,000
It's not real.
119
00:47:01,860 --> 00:47:02,860
Feel better?
120
00:53:40,140 --> 00:53:44,300
I was getting careless, or just not
caring anymore.
121
00:53:47,640 --> 00:53:53,120
I taunted the belief, dared them to find
me.
122
00:53:57,760 --> 00:54:01,040
But they continued to be inept.
123
00:59:20,040 --> 00:59:24,600
He wasn't, he wasn't, he wasn't...
124
01:00:13,259 --> 01:00:14,660
I want to warn you. I want to warn you.
I want to warn you.
125
01:00:16,919 --> 01:00:20,560
No, no, no, no, no.
126
01:00:52,419 --> 01:00:55,220
Thank you.
127
01:01:17,600 --> 01:01:20,400
Thank you.
8578
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