All language subtitles for Dickinson.S01E08.1080p.WEB-DL.DD5.1.H264-TOMMY

- Whoa.
- The carriage is here.

I can't believe you're leaving
on Christmas Eve.

Yes, they need me down in Washington,
and I have to beat the snowstorm.

But we need you here too, Daddy.

How are we gonna have our annual
Christmas dinner party without you?

It will just mean
more plum pudding for you.

Okay. Goodbye.

Austin, take care of the womenfolk for me.

I will.

And, Dad, do I have your permission

to sign off on the architect's plans
for the new house?

He wants to add an extra gable.

Yes, of course.
Whatever you think is suitable.

You're the master of that house now,
aren't you?

Yes.

I guess I'll be the master of this one
while you're away.

Well, now...

Mrs. Dickinson, are you still crying?

Edward, I have no more tears to shed.

I will only be gone a few months.

I will write you faithfully.
You must do the same.

I don't like to write.

There's still someone
who hasn't said goodbye to me.

Emily.

Emily!

Well, I'm off.

Aren't you sad that I'm leaving?

No.

I'm sad because
there are no flowers in winter.

Well, by the time I return,
everything will be green and growing.

And you will be happy.

Maybe I won't be here when you get back.

Where would you go?

Bye.

Bye, Dad.

Bye, Dad.

I miss you already.

We better start cooking.
Right, Mrs. Dickinson?

The guests will arrive by four.

- I'm going to sleep.
- To sleep?

But, Mother, it's broad daylight.

And we're expecting a houseful of guests.

Tell them not to come.

She's shirking her housewifely duties.

This is unheard of.

Oh, my God, this is so embarrassing.

Jane and the Humphreys
are coming for dinner

and neither of our parents will be here.

We have to cancel, you guys.
But how do we cancel? What's our excuse?

We could tell them
that I ate poisonous bark.

Again.

Hello, everyone. Just realizing
how late it is. I'll get out of your hair.

You don't have to go.

I mean, what are your Christmas plans?

Let's see. I might weave some rope,

or... can my January beans.

Those aren't plans.

Stay. Stay here for dinner.

Emily.

Now you're inviting more people?

Maggie is home with her family, and Mother
hasn't even started roasting the goose.

I'll roast the goose.

- You?
- Sure. Why not?

- But...
- I'll take care of the whole meal.

But you hate to cook.

- That's...
- You refuse to do any chores.

You once told me
you were allergic to the fabric of aprons.

Actually, it's not that I hate cooking.

It's that I don't typically prioritize it.

When I do make time to be in the kitchen,
I find that I really enjoy it.

So, Ben...

will you stay?

- If it's real...
- Wonderful! Dinner is on.

This is going to be
a very special Christmas.

"If your husband brings home company
when you are unprepared,"

rennet pudding can be made...
at five minutes' notice,

"provided you keep a piece of calf's rennet
ready prepared, soaking."

What's calf's rennet?

Enzymes scraped from a baby cow's
stomach after it's been butchered.

Cool. Might just do Indian pudding.

Can I help?

No. No, of course not, you silly man.
Cooking is women's work.

But I like to cook.

Here.

Let me take that.

You see? Men should spend
a little bit more time in the kitchen.

- Okay. You have made your point.
- But no...

Now, please, go sit by the fire
and rest your feet.

I wanna show you
what a good little woman I can be.

- Okay. You freak.
- Hey.

Oh, gosh.

Okay.

- What are you doing?
- What?

Why are you acting like this?

- Like what?
- Like the frugal little housewife herself.

Maybe I could be a housewife if I tried.

You?

I have to do something, Sue.

I can't live in my father's house anymore.

Well, you can't marry Ben.

Why not?

Emily, he's already married.

Right. Of course.

Where is his wife, anyway?

Shouldn't he be spending Christmas
with her?

- I don't know. Maybe she's dead.
- Emily!

Can we get back to work here?

We have to grate a buttload of nutmeg.

I'm honestly gonna die if we don't
find out who Esther's mother is soon.

It's obviously Lady Dedlock.

Austin, no spoilers!

What are you reading?

- Bleak House. It's so good.
- Cool.

I'm reading that too.
What chapter are you on?

Twenty-five. How many
chapters do you think there will be?

Well, who knows?
He gets paid by the word, so...

I never want it to end.

Oh, my God, Ben. Do you think
Esther will marry Mr. Jarndyce?

Gross. He's her guardian.

So what?
People marry their guardians all the time.

Oh, my God.

I'm such an Esther.

I'm such an Esther, it's insane.

- Last week you said you were an Ada.
- I know.

- I'm half an Ada, half an Esther.
- I think you're more of a Mrs. Jellyby.

Austin!

Hello.

Merry Christmas, Evelina.

It's Emily.

- Really?
- Yes. Come on in. How are you, Mr. Conkey?

- Very well. Very well.
- Good.

It's my first Christmas
since my wife died.

Both my daughters are married now, so...

I'm all alone.

Well, we're happy to see you.

Go into the parlor.
Help yourself to some spiced wine.

The Humphreys are here!

Why are you being so nice?

Jane, it's Christmas.

It's lovely to see you,
Mr. and Mrs. Humphrey.

- Merry Christmas.
- And...

This is our friend from Concord.
Louisa Alcott.

- Louisa May Alcott.
- All right.

- It's nice to meet you.
- Louisa's a published writer.

Really? You're published?

Yeah. My first book just came out.

It's called Flower Fables.

It sold pretty well.

- I made $35.
- Wow.

Louisa, you don't have to tell people
exactly how much you made.

Why not? I did it for the money.

Okay. Let's go get some snacks.

I like snacks.

And where is your mother?

She's just upstairs.

Well, go and get her, dear.

Mom. Everyone's here.
Will you come down now?

I'm not celebrating Christmas
without your father.

We don't need him, Mom.

- You'll see. We'll be just fine with...
- Tell that to my neuralgia.

Snuff the candle on your way out.

Emily, darling! Merry Christmas.

Merry Christmas, Aunt Lavinia.
You're looking well.

Isn't she? I'm so proud to be named
after you, Aunt Lavinia. You look amazing.

I have just returned
from the most incredible voyage to Spain.

Spanish men are so virile.

It's because of all the ham they eat.

I've eaten my share of ham.

Hello.

- Joseph, you came!
- What's up?

Where's the rest of your family?

At home throwing plates at each other,
like they do every Christmas.

Esther's mother.

Otherwise how do you explain

the sense of connection they felt
when they first met each other?

- And what about the documents?
- You guys are reading Bleak House?

- We're mainlining that shit.
- Me too.

I'm at the part
where Caddy and Prince Turveydrop

- are about to have their church wedding...
- No spoilers! No spoilers!

See? This is what I need to write.

Something people really get hooked on,
you know?

I mean, that's how you rake in the cash.

- Louisa.
- Okay, Jane. Seriously, what?

My family's broke.

My dad blew all his money
starting that commune,

and I got to make a living somehow,
and I'm not gonna be a governess.

No, it's not a good option.

Noted.

Jane says that you're a writer too.

Yeah. Yeah, I mean, kind of.

I'm not published.

Okay. Well, I can help with that.

Have you tried using a man's name?

Yeah, once.

That didn't work out.

Well, we should talk.

Do you wanna go for a run before dinner?

- A run?
- Yeah, I love to run.

That's, like, an actual fact about me.

My family likes to joke I might be part
horse, but that's beside the point.

Anyways, yeah, we should go for a run,

and I'll give you
some more writing advice.

Okay.

Just hope I'm not too fast.

You know, I just,
you know, I get going, and it's...

Actually, there are tons
of women publishing nowadays.

That's why Hawthorne called us
"a damned mob of scribbling women."

But Hawthorne can eat a dick, am I right?

Right.

You can absolutely make a living
as a writer.

I mean, look at Fanny Fern.

But her stories are so bawdy.

Well, sure.
Bawdy is just code for commercial.

I mean, that shit sells.

God, my father would kill me
if I wrote like Fanny Fern.

He won't even let me
publish a recipe for chicken soup.

Well, sure. Your family might disapprove.

I mean, they may never speak
to you again, but so what?

You'll be out there,
making a living on your own.

- On my own.
- You can do it. Anyone can.

You just can't be precious about it.

Write what sells.

Bodice rippers. Ghost stories.

Stuff about ravens.

Keep tabs on the marketplace.

Maybe throw in a line about corn.

Or soap, if you can get
the soap company to pay you.

And the best advice
I can give you is this:

Never get married.

Don't do it.

Don't throw your life away
on a man who expects you to cook and clean

and pop out little babies.

I mean, in the time
that it takes you to raise one baby,

you can write four, five novels,
and you can sell those novels.

But I don't write novels. I write poems.

Okay, that's another problem.

I have to... Perhaps it's time to stop now?

Whoa! Skirts up!

Log ahead!

Look. Aunt Lavinia,
you're sitting next to me.

How delightful.

Hey, Ben. You're over here.

Isn't that your mother's seat?

Not if she won't come downstairs.

Where is my sister?
I'm getting very concerned.

I'm right here.

Emily, darling.

Where were you?

Well, I wasn't sure
whether I had the strength to come down.

But then I thought,
"It's Christmas, and my family needs me."

Although, by the look of this table,
maybe you don't.

It all looks so nice.

Emily did everything, Mom.
You wouldn't believe it.

And it turns out she's a really good cook.

Well, I guess there's a reason
we named you after me.

- Just sit here. We'll just scoot over.
- Ithamar, thank you.

Mom.

Mom. You okay?

Oopsies!

- I'm fine. Sit!
- Yeah, just scoot over.

- Emily. Sit near me.
- May I...

Okay.

Okay. It's goose time!

Vinnie, my dear, you look so brown.
You look like a roasted ham.

Did somebody say ham?

It's my trip to Spain, darling.

I feel simply reborn.

As soon as my late husband slash cousin,
Loring died, I just jumped on the ship.

I didn't stop laughing the whole time.

Apparently, I had something called
"widow's euphoria."

Is that what happens
when you marry your cousin?

Maybe I should write a travel book.

You should! You must!

Experience everything.

Live all your dreams.

Yeah, I'm just trying to get paid.

You know,
I'm just about that hustle, so...

Listen, girls, girls.

If you want something in this life,
you just have to reach out and grab it!

Sue, you wouldn't go on a cruise
without me after I died, would you?

I bet she would.

What about a book on a ship?

Like a whaling ship.

Like...

A dude chasing a whale.

No, forget it. That's boring.

Lavinia, can you pass the cranberry sauce?

And shouldn't you two
be having your wedding already?

Yeah, I feel like you've been
planning it for ages.

Well, it takes a while to plan a wedding.

And we're building our own house.

So, I guess I'll be having
my wedding first, then.

- Hear! Hear!
- Congratulations.

- Hear! Hear!
- Yes, yeah, I'm engaged. That's right.

To William Wilkinson.

He's a harness manufacturer.

We're moving to Southwick.

I'm just...

so excited you're getting married.

Congratulations, Jane.

It just makes me so sad.

What makes you sad, Mother?

Emily being left behind.

Mom, not now.

I just don't want you to end up all alone,
and time is slipping away.

Of course, getting married is no guarantee

- that you won't be lonely.
- Right.

Look at me. I'm married to your father all
these years, and I'm alone on Christmas.

Stop.

I'm sorry.

- I'll just eat more.
- Okay.

Pretty ankles...

Is this grated nutmeg?

- Did you do this?
- I sure did.

- It's lovely.
- Good.

Emily. You're lovely.

Okay, this is it.
This is an idea for a novel.

It's coming to me. It's...

Yeah, okay, okay.
It's something about family.

And it's a family with no father,

just a bunch of sisters and their mom,

and it starts on Christmas.

That doesn't sound like a hit.

Okay, yeah, but stick with me.

What if one of the sisters dies?

That just made me so sad.

- That's the smallest I've ever seen.
- What about... Yep.

You have to stop throwing yourself at him.

What? Who?

He's a married man, Em.

You're embarrassing yourself.

Hey, babe.

Isn't it crazy to think next year we'll be
spending Christmas in our own house?

This has all been so nice.

Thank you for making me stay.

I wouldn't have wanted
to be alone on Christmas.

- Thank you.
- Why aren't you with your wife?

She's traveling at the moment. Abroad.

Traveling? Really?

Let's just hope she's not on a cruise
with a bunch of lusty Spaniards,

like Aunt Lavinia.

No, no.

I hope not.

Hey, I like your cravat.

Oh, thanks.

- Yeah.
- It's my Christmas cravat.

Very cool.

I like this guy.

Even though Dad gave him my promotion.

You're welcome to take my place.

Those law cases are endless.

Like Jarndyce and Jarndyce.

Bleak House reference. Boom!

We're happy to have you, Ben.

I love you, Vinnie.

- I love you, Emily.
- I love you, Vinnie.

Why don't you play something, Sue?

Come on. For me.

I'll play something.

For Emily.

- What a lovely Christmas Eve, just lovely.
- See?

And we didn't even need Dad.

- Let's get into bed now, Mom.
- Emily, I'm so proud of you.

I'm so proud that you share my name.

I've put too much pressure on you,
haven't I?

Pressure?

About getting married.

I know I have.

But then tonight I realized,

"Well, if she doesn't wanna get married,
why should she have to?"

- Thank you.
- Marriage isn't for everyone.

- And besides, with your father gone...
- Yeah.

I'm gonna need someone
to take care of me.

I never thought that you'd be up for that,

but now I know you will.

It'll be so nice.

You'll stay here with me.

And cook and bake,
and tend to me when I'm feeble.

Emily, when I'm old and sick,
we'll still be here together.

Just like this, you and me. Forever.

Lovely.

Just lovely.

Boo!

Tricked you.

Jesus. Good one.

Hop in.

Okay, so, he's not really married, is he?

No.

The ring is a fake.

Yeah, well,
the way he looks at you, it better be.

I have to tell you...

I never thought I'd be jealous
of a man stealing your heart.

You're jealous?

Maybe.

A little.

I guess it was selfish of me to think
that I could marry Austin

and that you'd just stay here
in this house, like...

like a pet or something.

Like one of Lavinia's cats.

Always there for me to cuddle
when I felt like it.

To forget about when I didn't.

So.

Why him?

I guess I'm learning from him.

Learning?

Learning what?

Well, like, maybe a man and a woman
don't have to get married.

Maybe there are other possibilities,
other ways to share a life.

I don't know what you mean.

I don't exactly know myself.

I just feel like I can be honest with him.

I can trust that when I speak a word,
he hears it.

He gets its meaning.

A poet's definition of love.

Yeah.

And the only person that's ever
made me feel that way before...

was you.

What was that? A ghost?

No. It's probably just a goblin.

Presents!

Yes.

Damn.

Total unwrapping achieved.

Thirty seconds. I think that's a record.

Anything good?

I got the next chapter of Bleak House.

Nice. We'll find out
who killed Tulkinghorn.

Wait, Tulkinghorn dies?

Oops.

Anyway, Dad got you something.

You didn't open it?

He made me promise not to.

What is it?

Looks like a sort of greenhouse.

Look, there's a note.

"For Emily, who thinks flowers
are nicer than people."

The conservatory will be attached
to the house.

So you can grow roses year-round,
and you will always be happy.

"Faithfully, your Father."

Wait, he's building you a conservatory?

I got a magazine.

Let me out!

Hello...

Hello, Dickinsons.

Merry Christmas.

- Merry Christmas.
- I forgot my mittens.

I just came to pick them up.

Excuse me.

That sounds pretty bad.

Are you getting sick?

It's just a little flu, I think.

I stayed up too late last night.

And your dad is working me to the bone.

Well, I'll be off now.

Enjoy your presents.

Wait, Ben.

I'll walk you home.

Okay.

That would be nice.

Let me just grab my coat.

Emily, he's married.

No, he's not.

Cool.

Look at the light.

The way it slants through the trees.

You only see light
as sharp as that in winter.

Hey, babe.

Austin, I have to talk to you.

Okay.

Do you think
we can be really honest with each other?

I hope so.

Do you think when I speak,
you understand what I mean?

I'm not sure
that's what's happening right now.

Austin, I'm scared.

Of what?

I'm afraid of having children.

What do you mean?

I'm just so afraid. I don't even know
how to tell you how afraid I am.

What's scary about kids?

I mean, they're annoying,
but they're nothing to fear.

My mother died giving birth to me.

She pushed me out, and it killed her.

I've spent my whole life
terrified of that.

What if it happens to me?

I had no idea.

I needed you to know.

I don't wanna lose you, Austin.

You have no idea
how good that makes me feel.

You can tell me anything.

You know that?

And we don't have to have kids.

- We don't?
- Not if you don't want to.

- You'd really marry me, even if I...
- Sue...

all I want is to marry you.

And...

I'm just...

really glad you were born.

Thanks for walking me home.

You're welcome.

Walking in silence was nice.

It was.

You know... being with you...

Yeah?

It's a lot like being alone.

Oh, God, I am so sorry.

Don't apologize. It's okay.

I don't wanna get you sick.

I've never felt better in my life.

There's a certain Slant of light,

Winter Afternoons -

That oppresses, like the Heft
Of Cathedral Tunes -

Heavenly Hurt, it gives us -

We can find no scar,

But internal difference -