Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:16,680 --> 00:00:19,274
WOMAN: No qualifications?
MAN: No.
2
00:00:21,000 --> 00:00:22,960
Why did you lose your last job?
3
00:00:22,960 --> 00:00:25,160
I bent my tube.
4
00:00:25,160 --> 00:00:27,400
I was a plan carrier
for an architect.
5
00:00:27,400 --> 00:00:30,200
I had to roll them up
into this tube and...
6
00:00:30,200 --> 00:00:32,589
I'm afraid we don't have anything
for you here.
7
00:00:35,720 --> 00:00:37,600
Unless...
8
00:00:37,600 --> 00:00:40,558
( QUIRKY MUSIC )
9
00:01:41,440 --> 00:01:44,398
( QUIRKY MUSIC CONTINUES )
10
00:01:54,960 --> 00:01:56,393
Arggh!
11
00:02:10,160 --> 00:02:12,400
Look, where do you want to go, lady?
12
00:02:12,400 --> 00:02:15,040
We've been driving around the city
now for, uh...
13
00:02:15,040 --> 00:02:17,190
.$11.45.
14
00:02:19,280 --> 00:02:21,800
Do you mind if I sit in the front?
15
00:02:21,800 --> 00:02:24,400
Huh?
I'm feeling unprotected back here.
16
00:02:24,400 --> 00:02:25,880
OK. I'll pull over.
17
00:02:25,880 --> 00:02:28,235
Don't stop. It's a clearway.
I'll climb over.
18
00:02:37,680 --> 00:02:39,160
Feeling better?
19
00:02:39,160 --> 00:02:40,800
Much.
20
00:02:40,800 --> 00:02:43,120
Hey, look, what's the big idea?
21
00:02:43,120 --> 00:02:45,920
I want to make love to you
while you're driving.
22
00:02:45,920 --> 00:02:47,920
Preferably at
some busy intersection.
23
00:02:47,920 --> 00:02:50,320
Do you want to get me sacked?
Yes.
24
00:02:50,320 --> 00:02:52,640
Why?
Because then I can look after you.
25
00:02:52,640 --> 00:02:54,880
You're too young
to be driving a taxi,
26
00:02:54,880 --> 00:02:57,155
picking up
strange nymphomaniacs like me.
27
00:02:58,200 --> 00:03:01,200
W-What particular intersection
did you have in mind?
28
00:03:01,200 --> 00:03:02,633
This one.
29
00:03:03,720 --> 00:03:05,200
( TYRES SCREECH )
30
00:03:05,200 --> 00:03:08,158
( CAR HORNS BLARE )
31
00:03:22,560 --> 00:03:25,518
( CAR HORNS CONTINUE BLARING )
32
00:03:29,760 --> 00:03:31,318
( TAPPING AT WINDOW )
33
00:03:32,360 --> 00:03:34,560
Hey! What are you doing in there?
34
00:03:34,560 --> 00:03:36,516
( CAR HORNS CONTINUE BLARING )
35
00:04:05,680 --> 00:04:07,920
Sorry. I didn't realise
there was anyone here.
36
00:04:07,920 --> 00:04:10,440
That's quite alright.
You can clean up around me.
37
00:04:10,440 --> 00:04:13,520
No, I'll come back later on.
You'd best do it now.
38
00:04:13,520 --> 00:04:15,431
I expect I'll be here all night.
39
00:04:17,160 --> 00:04:18,912
OK, uh...
40
00:04:20,120 --> 00:04:21,600
I'll, uh...I'll do your bin.
41
00:04:21,600 --> 00:04:23,033
Alright.
42
00:04:26,560 --> 00:04:28,278
Um...where is it?
43
00:04:29,320 --> 00:04:30,753
Under the desk, I think.
44
00:04:39,360 --> 00:04:40,793
( THUD!)
45
00:04:45,960 --> 00:04:47,440
Is something the matter?
46
00:04:47,440 --> 00:04:49,240
Uh...no, no.
47
00:04:49,240 --> 00:04:51,276
I just, ah, bumped me head.
48
00:05:02,640 --> 00:05:04,392
Did...did you leave, uh...
49
00:05:06,880 --> 00:05:09,474
...in a hurry for work this morning?
50
00:05:10,800 --> 00:05:12,995
Let me see if you've got a bump.
51
00:05:15,440 --> 00:05:19,149
SONG: # Alvin,
make them wave bye-bye
52
00:05:20,440 --> 00:05:24,035
# Alvin, make them sing,
ding-a-ling, why, oh, why
53
00:05:25,200 --> 00:05:27,350
# Alvin, make them cry
54
00:05:30,640 --> 00:05:33,996
# Alvin, make them laugh, hello
55
00:05:35,280 --> 00:05:38,875
# Alvin, make them hot
Give them a sign, no, no
56
00:05:39,960 --> 00:05:41,712
# Alvin, don't let go
57
00:05:45,560 --> 00:05:47,880
# Whoa-ho-ho
58
00:05:47,880 --> 00:05:50,155
# Because it had to be you
59
00:05:53,200 --> 00:05:55,800
# Whoa-ho-ho
60
00:05:55,800 --> 00:05:58,360
# Because it had to be you
61
00:06:01,280 --> 00:06:04,760
# Try to avoid it
Just resist it, now and then
62
00:06:04,760 --> 00:06:07,040
# If you'd only try to understand
63
00:06:07,040 --> 00:06:09,280
# Oh, there you go again
64
00:06:09,280 --> 00:06:11,920
# Whoa-ho-ho
65
00:06:11,920 --> 00:06:14,354
# Because it had to be you
66
00:06:17,120 --> 00:06:19,760
# Whoa-ho-ho
67
00:06:19,760 --> 00:06:22,354
# Because it had to be you
68
00:06:25,280 --> 00:06:29,068
# Alvin, make them wave bye-bye
69
00:06:30,240 --> 00:06:34,160
# Alvin make them sing,
ding-a-ling, why, oh, why
70
00:06:34,160 --> 00:06:36,913
# Alvin, make them cry
71
00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:42,720
# Whoa-ho-ho
72
00:06:42,720 --> 00:06:45,314
# Because it had to be you
73
00:06:48,280 --> 00:06:50,280
# Whoa-ho-ho
74
00:06:50,280 --> 00:06:52,999
# Because it had to be you
75
00:06:56,200 --> 00:06:58,520
# Whoa-ho-ho
76
00:06:58,520 --> 00:07:00,909
# Because it had to be you. #
77
00:07:06,160 --> 00:07:08,960
By the way,
I've got a great job for you.
78
00:07:08,960 --> 00:07:10,960
Yeah?
Bra salesman.
79
00:07:10,960 --> 00:07:12,440
Oh, very funny.
80
00:07:12,440 --> 00:07:16,080
No, mate. I'm going up north,
as far away as I can get.
81
00:07:16,080 --> 00:07:17,640
Plenty of women up north.
82
00:07:17,640 --> 00:07:20,234
Yeah. Not as many of them.
83
00:07:24,560 --> 00:07:25,993
What is it you've got?
84
00:07:27,280 --> 00:07:29,200
A bloody sore back.
85
00:07:29,200 --> 00:07:30,680
You know what I mean.
86
00:07:30,680 --> 00:07:32,600
You're not handsome.
Oh, thanks.
87
00:07:32,600 --> 00:07:34,400
Nothing even memorable about you.
88
00:07:34,400 --> 00:07:36,200
Now, here's me -
89
00:07:36,200 --> 00:07:40,200
a loving, noble bloke that any bird
would be proud to get to know.
90
00:07:40,200 --> 00:07:43,560
If only she'd open her eyes
and take a look at me.
91
00:07:43,560 --> 00:07:45,520
But I never get to first base.
92
00:07:45,520 --> 00:07:47,320
That's what hurts most.
93
00:07:47,320 --> 00:07:49,276
The inequality of life.
94
00:08:00,280 --> 00:08:02,240
Do you want to swap?
(Chuckles)
95
00:08:02,240 --> 00:08:05,240
( UPBEAT MUSIC)
96
00:08:05,240 --> 00:08:06,912
Come on, Alvin!
97
00:08:07,960 --> 00:08:11,440
Come on, my boyo! Faster!
( ENGINE SPLUTTERS )
98
00:08:11,440 --> 00:08:12,920
Northward!
99
00:08:12,920 --> 00:08:14,400
To the dead heart!
100
00:08:14,400 --> 00:08:16,040
Alice!
101
00:08:16,040 --> 00:08:17,473
Darwin!
102
00:08:19,960 --> 00:08:22,918
( RAMBLING MUSIC)
103
00:08:38,960 --> 00:08:40,393
(Alvin toots horn)
104
00:08:42,360 --> 00:08:44,000
Fill her up, thanks, mate.
105
00:08:44,000 --> 00:08:45,433
She's running a bit rough.
106
00:08:46,960 --> 00:08:48,960
You planning on driving this thing?
107
00:08:48,960 --> 00:08:51,200
What do you suggest we do with it?
108
00:08:51,200 --> 00:08:52,952
Hmmph! I'd shoot the bastard.
109
00:08:55,280 --> 00:08:56,760
( GURGLING SOUND )
Christ!
110
00:08:56,760 --> 00:08:58,960
Look, I'd better have a look at this.
111
00:08:58,960 --> 00:09:00,712
I'll push her around the back.
112
00:09:14,960 --> 00:09:17,554
( MUSIC PLAYS FAINTLY
ON STEREO)
113
00:09:32,680 --> 00:09:34,113
(Clears throat)
114
00:09:35,160 --> 00:09:36,640
WOMAN: What do you want?
115
00:09:36,640 --> 00:09:38,790
Oh, any chance of a cuppa?
116
00:09:41,080 --> 00:09:42,560
Cup of tea?
117
00:09:42,560 --> 00:09:44,040
Yeah, thanks.
118
00:09:44,040 --> 00:09:46,360
Sure you wouldn't like
a three-course meal?
119
00:09:46,360 --> 00:09:49,360
Oysters, steak, lemon meringue pie -
something like that?
120
00:09:49,360 --> 00:09:51,600
Uh...no.
Not just at the moment, thanks.
121
00:09:51,600 --> 00:09:53,591
Just as well. We haven't got any.
122
00:10:28,440 --> 00:10:30,908
Milk in your tea?
Uh, yes, please.
123
00:10:38,960 --> 00:10:42,111
What a heap.
Even the bodywork's had it.
124
00:10:47,320 --> 00:10:49,840
I suppose you had a good look
just then?
125
00:10:49,840 --> 00:10:53,160
Eh?
When I did what I just did.
126
00:10:53,160 --> 00:10:55,440
I suppose you had
a real good eyeful.
127
00:10:55,440 --> 00:10:58,280
What did you do when you just did it?
128
00:10:58,280 --> 00:11:00,920
I bent over. That's what I did.
129
00:11:00,920 --> 00:11:02,353
Like this.
130
00:11:09,280 --> 00:11:12,360
Once she gets this hot,
there's no telling what will happen.
131
00:11:12,360 --> 00:11:13,840
See it that time?
132
00:11:13,840 --> 00:11:15,840
Uh...yes.
133
00:11:15,840 --> 00:11:17,512
I couldn't really miss.
134
00:11:18,960 --> 00:11:22,280
Hasn't been a stiff breeze
through there in six years.
135
00:11:22,280 --> 00:11:24,032
(Chokes and splutters)
136
00:11:25,080 --> 00:11:26,560
Tea no good?
137
00:11:26,560 --> 00:11:30,235
Uh, no. It just went down
the wrong way, that's all.
138
00:11:32,960 --> 00:11:34,440
Oh.
139
00:11:34,440 --> 00:11:36,280
What a terrible embarrassment.
140
00:11:36,280 --> 00:11:38,440
And in front of a customer too.
141
00:11:38,440 --> 00:11:40,800
There's the trouble.
Needs a good blow out.
142
00:11:40,800 --> 00:11:42,960
I'll just pull it off.
143
00:11:42,960 --> 00:11:45,280
Can't have that now, can we?
144
00:11:45,280 --> 00:11:47,680
I'll have to go and mend it
immediately.
145
00:11:47,680 --> 00:11:49,113
Excuse me.
146
00:12:00,200 --> 00:12:01,680
Can you thread a needle?
147
00:12:01,680 --> 00:12:03,400
Uh...yeah, I suppose so.
148
00:12:03,400 --> 00:12:05,200
'Cause I'm all fingers and thumbs.
149
00:12:05,200 --> 00:12:07,160
Went to see an eye doctor once.
150
00:12:07,160 --> 00:12:10,640
I couldn't read the chart unless
he put it right under my nose.
151
00:12:10,640 --> 00:12:12,520
Could you do it for me?
152
00:12:12,520 --> 00:12:14,795
(Sighs) Sure.
153
00:12:20,480 --> 00:12:21,913
(Sighs)
154
00:12:44,200 --> 00:12:46,794
Hey, you look lovely
when you do that.
155
00:12:48,080 --> 00:12:49,560
What?
156
00:12:49,560 --> 00:12:51,152
Go all cross-eyed.
157
00:12:53,840 --> 00:12:55,600
MAN: Mae!
158
00:12:55,600 --> 00:12:57,080
Hey, Mae!
159
00:12:57,080 --> 00:12:59,833
Quick. If he sees us like this,
he'll kill us.
160
00:13:00,880 --> 00:13:02,360
Mae?
161
00:13:02,360 --> 00:13:03,952
You there, Mae?
162
00:13:05,000 --> 00:13:06,956
Slipped out for a while.
163
00:13:15,680 --> 00:13:18,274
Well, well...
164
00:13:25,600 --> 00:13:28,558
( DRAMATIC MUSIC )
165
00:13:43,520 --> 00:13:46,478
(Rooster crows)
166
00:13:52,440 --> 00:13:54,840
They don't build these places
very good.
167
00:13:54,840 --> 00:13:58,150
A truck's only got to go past
and they all fall down.
168
00:13:59,200 --> 00:14:02,200
( TRUCK RUMBLES PAST)
169
00:14:02,200 --> 00:14:03,680
(Chuckles)
170
00:14:03,680 --> 00:14:05,636
Well, sometimes they do.
171
00:14:08,080 --> 00:14:09,560
Well, it's, uh...
172
00:14:09,560 --> 00:14:11,880
It's been very nice meeting you
173
00:14:11,880 --> 00:14:14,520
but I think perhaps
I'd better be going.
174
00:14:14,520 --> 00:14:17,557
Oh, off you go,
and it was nice meeting you.
175
00:14:18,960 --> 00:14:21,679
Oh, oh.
Don't bother paying for the tea.
176
00:14:33,440 --> 00:14:35,192
Ah, there you are.
177
00:15:02,360 --> 00:15:03,793
( CAR HORN SOUNDS )
178
00:15:05,920 --> 00:15:07,353
Who's this?
179
00:15:08,840 --> 00:15:10,558
(Blows raspberry and laughs)
180
00:15:14,120 --> 00:15:16,076
WOMEN: Yay!
181
00:15:21,360 --> 00:15:23,635
Come on, Alvin. Come on!
182
00:15:27,080 --> 00:15:29,036
(Women giggle)
183
00:15:41,640 --> 00:15:43,120
What is this?
184
00:15:43,120 --> 00:15:44,760
It's a women's cricket team.
185
00:15:44,760 --> 00:15:46,440
It's the Luther Hall Old Girls.
186
00:15:46,440 --> 00:15:47,920
You don't look very old.
187
00:15:47,920 --> 00:15:49,920
They don't act very old, you mean.
188
00:15:49,920 --> 00:15:52,120
But they did leave. Only last year.
189
00:15:52,120 --> 00:15:53,600
We're going to Muffington
190
00:15:53,600 --> 00:15:56,280
for our annual belt-up,
beer-up grudge match.
191
00:15:56,280 --> 00:15:57,760
What school are you playing?
192
00:15:57,760 --> 00:15:59,760
We're not playing girls.
It's the men.
193
00:15:59,760 --> 00:16:01,318
(Women giggle)
194
00:16:06,040 --> 00:16:08,040
I can't look them in the face.
195
00:16:08,040 --> 00:16:10,680
That's not where you're supposed to
look at them.
196
00:16:10,680 --> 00:16:12,160
Oh, very funny.
197
00:16:12,160 --> 00:16:13,752
The whole bloody cricket team.
198
00:16:19,680 --> 00:16:21,432
Couple of poofters here, mate.
199
00:16:23,960 --> 00:16:26,200
Well, if you're not feeling
up to it,
200
00:16:26,200 --> 00:16:27,840
there's always your old mate.
201
00:16:27,840 --> 00:16:29,480
Yeah?
Yeah.
202
00:16:29,480 --> 00:16:31,480
If you've got any merchandise
to spare,
203
00:16:31,480 --> 00:16:34,517
I'd only be too happy
to take it off your hands.
204
00:16:36,600 --> 00:16:38,033
( KNOCK AT DOOCR )
205
00:17:03,920 --> 00:17:06,878
I'll see you in two minutes.
Room 108.
206
00:17:17,960 --> 00:17:20,760
First one coming up, mate.
Thanks, Alvin.
207
00:17:20,760 --> 00:17:22,440
You're a real mate.
208
00:17:22,440 --> 00:17:23,873
Best of luck.
209
00:17:57,040 --> 00:17:59,474
Entre, mon cheri.
210
00:18:04,280 --> 00:18:05,713
( KNOCK AT DOOCR )
211
00:18:08,760 --> 00:18:11,399
It's only me.
Can I come in for a minute?
212
00:18:14,680 --> 00:18:16,320
Oh, I hope you don't mind.
213
00:18:16,320 --> 00:18:18,320
I can't sleep tonight.
214
00:18:18,320 --> 00:18:20,920
I get the jitters
the night before a match.
215
00:18:20,920 --> 00:18:22,440
The jitters?
Nerves.
216
00:18:22,440 --> 00:18:24,032
Nerves. (Laughs nervously)
217
00:18:25,080 --> 00:18:28,789
Um, look, excuse me for a minute.
I've gotta make a quick phone call.
218
00:18:39,800 --> 00:18:43,588
( PHONE RINGS )
219
00:18:44,880 --> 00:18:46,560
ALVIN: Well, how'd you go?
220
00:18:46,560 --> 00:18:48,120
Like a white tornado!
221
00:18:48,120 --> 00:18:52,320
Can you, er, handle another one?
Give us time to catch my breath.
222
00:18:52,320 --> 00:18:55,357
Number two's already here.
Can you or can't you?
223
00:18:56,400 --> 00:18:58,311
Send her over.
224
00:19:00,120 --> 00:19:02,800
Um, look, I was thinking...
( KNOCK AT DOOR )
225
00:19:02,800 --> 00:19:04,400
Who's that?
226
00:19:04,400 --> 00:19:06,356
I dunno.
227
00:19:12,880 --> 00:19:14,400
See you in two minutes.
228
00:19:14,400 --> 00:19:15,833
Room 108.
229
00:19:23,520 --> 00:19:25,272
( KNOCK AT DOOCR )
230
00:19:33,440 --> 00:19:35,317
Entre, mon cherie!
231
00:19:41,360 --> 00:19:43,800
Now, look,
I don't wanna be a wet blanket...
232
00:19:43,800 --> 00:19:46,360
( KNOCK AT DOOR )
Who the hell's that?
233
00:19:46,360 --> 00:19:48,520
WOMAN: Mr Purple.
It's Meredith!
234
00:19:48,520 --> 00:19:50,317
Meredith?
235
00:19:55,520 --> 00:19:58,040
Ah, Mr Purple, I know it's awfully late,
236
00:19:58,040 --> 00:20:00,320
I mean, knocking you up like this
237
00:20:00,320 --> 00:20:04,400
but I felt I should warn you about the...
238
00:20:04,400 --> 00:20:05,880
A-about the...
239
00:20:05,880 --> 00:20:09,040
...girls.
Oh, the girls.
240
00:20:09,040 --> 00:20:11,000
Yes, well, you know what it's like
241
00:20:11,000 --> 00:20:13,240
when a group
of high-spirited young girls
242
00:20:13,240 --> 00:20:15,200
get away
from the restraints of home.
243
00:20:15,200 --> 00:20:17,080
It turns their heads.
244
00:20:17,080 --> 00:20:20,040
Yeah, I s'pose it does.
You must be the...
245
00:20:20,040 --> 00:20:22,840
Yes. I'm their team captain
and their chaperone.
246
00:20:22,840 --> 00:20:25,280
Oh. Must be quite a handful.
247
00:20:25,280 --> 00:20:28,477
I mean, to look after that many girls
must be quite, er...
248
00:20:29,520 --> 00:20:33,229
Ah, excuse me for a minute. I've just
gotta make a quick telephone call.
249
00:20:35,120 --> 00:20:37,475
Oh!
(Coughs loudly) "
250
00:20:46,680 --> 00:20:50,229
( PHONE RINGS )
251
00:20:52,520 --> 00:20:55,480
ALVIN: How'd you go, me boy?
Quite a change of pace.
252
00:20:55,480 --> 00:20:57,080
Think you can handle another one?
253
00:20:57,080 --> 00:20:59,520
It's a bloody traffic jam in here!
Oh! No!
254
00:20:59,520 --> 00:21:01,120
Come on! What's wrong with you?
255
00:21:01,120 --> 00:21:03,280
Honestly,
I don't think I could raise it!
256
00:21:03,280 --> 00:21:05,635
Look, mate,
this one is right up your alley.
257
00:21:07,080 --> 00:21:09,833
OK. Send her over.
258
00:21:16,960 --> 00:21:18,518
( KNOCK AT DOOCR )
259
00:21:20,400 --> 00:21:21,880
Who's that?
260
00:21:21,880 --> 00:21:23,313
I dunno.
261
00:21:30,080 --> 00:21:32,878
I'll see you in a couple of minutes -
room 108.
262
00:21:38,480 --> 00:21:40,072
( KNOCK AT DOOCR )
263
00:21:50,480 --> 00:21:52,277
Entre, mon cherie.
264
00:21:56,000 --> 00:22:01,400
Oh, oh, darls.
This is all so...so unexpected!
265
00:22:01,400 --> 00:22:03,280
What the hell?!
266
00:22:03,280 --> 00:22:07,200
Hang about! Ah, uh, uh!
267
00:22:07,200 --> 00:22:08,920
Oh, don't be like that!
268
00:22:08,920 --> 00:22:10,880
Oh! Oh!!
269
00:22:10,880 --> 00:22:12,313
Meanie!
270
00:22:14,880 --> 00:22:18,200
Well, Mr Purple,
I really was very worried...
271
00:22:18,200 --> 00:22:19,633
(Squeaks)
272
00:22:23,440 --> 00:22:24,873
Ahem.
273
00:22:25,920 --> 00:22:28,880
You have a lot of explaining to do,
my young lady!
274
00:22:28,880 --> 00:22:32,316
Hal If it comes to that,
how do you happen to be here?
275
00:22:35,120 --> 00:22:36,553
On (Giggles)
276
00:22:38,720 --> 00:22:41,800
MEREDITH: I'll have you know
it's my business to be...
277
00:22:41,800 --> 00:22:44,240
You really know
how to help out a mate!
278
00:22:44,240 --> 00:22:46,240
What do you mean?
Thanks, Alvin.
279
00:22:46,240 --> 00:22:49,232
Thanks a million!
“Right up my alley”!
280
00:23:00,120 --> 00:23:01,680
GIRL: Come on, Luther Hall!
281
00:23:01,680 --> 00:23:04,638
(CHEERS)
282
00:23:05,680 --> 00:23:08,680
( APPLAUSE )
283
00:23:08,680 --> 00:23:11,592
ALL: Hip-hip hooray!!!
284
00:23:16,160 --> 00:23:18,515
Ah, Luther Hall, thanks, mate.
(Sniggers)
285
00:23:20,080 --> 00:23:23,516
$40...$2,000. You could lose the hall!
286
00:23:24,960 --> 00:23:27,000
Thanks.
Here, what about you, mate?
287
00:23:27,000 --> 00:23:28,880
50 to 1, the women.
No, thanks.
288
00:23:28,880 --> 00:23:30,996
He's mad enough for both of us.
(Chuckles)
289
00:23:32,040 --> 00:23:34,998
( CHEERING AND APPLAUSE )
290
00:23:39,200 --> 00:23:41,040
Come on, Luther Hall!
291
00:23:41,040 --> 00:23:44,040
Now, no bodyline
when you're playing the ladies!
292
00:23:44,040 --> 00:23:47,240
Meredith can handle the balls,
no worries!
293
00:23:47,240 --> 00:23:49,435
(All laugh uproariously)
294
00:23:59,120 --> 00:24:01,280
Now, don't poke, honey, don't poke!
295
00:24:01,280 --> 00:24:02,918
(All laugh)
296
00:24:09,600 --> 00:24:12,558
Howzat!
( WOMEN GROAN )
297
00:24:13,920 --> 00:24:15,512
Not exactly a good omen.
298
00:24:17,760 --> 00:24:19,240
( WOMEN GROAN )
299
00:24:19,240 --> 00:24:20,720
Howzat!
300
00:24:20,720 --> 00:24:23,712
( MEN LAUGH )
301
00:24:32,000 --> 00:24:35,560
My advice, man,
is hang on to your crease!
302
00:24:35,560 --> 00:24:37,960
(Men laugh)
303
00:24:37,960 --> 00:24:41,077
( CROWD MOANS )
304
00:24:42,800 --> 00:24:44,233
Howzat!
305
00:24:46,080 --> 00:24:48,355
Looks like we've done our dough,
boy.
306
00:24:52,000 --> 00:24:54,958
( YOBBOS LAUGH DERISIVELY)
307
00:24:59,600 --> 00:25:01,160
Howzat!
Hey, hey!
308
00:25:01,160 --> 00:25:04,118
( WOMEN MOAN, APPLAUSE )
309
00:25:11,600 --> 00:25:13,640
MAN: Cop the wog sheila!
310
00:25:13,640 --> 00:25:16,160
Doing anything tonight, hairy legs?
(Men laugh)
311
00:25:16,160 --> 00:25:19,197
Now, I'll give you odds
on that little number!
312
00:25:33,320 --> 00:25:35,072
( APPLAUSE AND CHEERING )
313
00:25:40,560 --> 00:25:42,240
( APPLAUSE AND CHEERING )
314
00:25:42,240 --> 00:25:43,958
WOMAN: Come on, Luther Hall!
315
00:25:50,320 --> 00:25:53,360
( APPLAUSE AND CHEERING )
316
00:25:53,360 --> 00:25:58,275
Oh! She can put her bat under my bed
any time she likes!
317
00:25:59,680 --> 00:26:03,639
( APPLAUSE AND CHEERING )
318
00:26:09,320 --> 00:26:12,517
( APPLAUSE AND CHEERING )
319
00:26:36,160 --> 00:26:39,000
( CROWD ROARS )
320
00:26:39,000 --> 00:26:41,958
( APPLAUSE AND CHEERING )
321
00:26:43,600 --> 00:26:46,000
We should never have given
the bitches the vote!
322
00:26:46,000 --> 00:26:47,480
(All murmur agreement)
323
00:26:47,480 --> 00:26:48,960
(Mimics girl) Great innings, Dulcie!
324
00:26:48,960 --> 00:26:50,791
Let's get out of here, quick smart!
325
00:26:55,720 --> 00:26:57,320
There's something funny
about those sheilas.
326
00:26:57,320 --> 00:27:00,596
How do you mean?
Have you had a good look at 'em?
327
00:27:02,520 --> 00:27:04,320
You made a killing.
328
00:27:04,320 --> 00:27:07,551
$40 at 50 to 1. Two grand.
329
00:27:08,600 --> 00:27:12,080
That's funny! When she made
that bet with me, she was a bloke.
330
00:27:12,080 --> 00:27:14,760
She was a bloke? Hey! She's a bloke!
331
00:27:14,760 --> 00:27:16,640
Come on!
OK!
332
00:27:16,640 --> 00:27:19,598
( JAUNTY JAZZ MUSIC PLAYS )
333
00:27:21,080 --> 00:27:24,038
( MOB YELLS ABUSE )
334
00:27:43,320 --> 00:27:46,278
( ROULETTE WHEEL RATTLES )
335
00:27:50,360 --> 00:27:52,000
CROUPIER: No more bets, thank you.
336
00:27:52,000 --> 00:27:54,760
( BALL CLATTERS TO AHALT)
337
00:27:54,760 --> 00:27:58,760
CROUPIER: It's a black four.
Low and even. Black four.
338
00:27:58,760 --> 00:28:00,990
Place your bets, please.
339
00:28:02,040 --> 00:28:03,632
MAN: 10 on red, please.
340
00:28:05,640 --> 00:28:07,073
MAN: Three on the reds.
341
00:28:08,160 --> 00:28:09,880
CROUPIER: Fifteen on passe.
342
00:28:09,880 --> 00:28:12,160
100 on manque. Last bets please.
343
00:28:12,160 --> 00:28:14,120
No more bets.
344
00:28:14,120 --> 00:28:16,360
( BALL CLATTERS )
345
00:28:16,360 --> 00:28:18,760
CROUPIER: And it's a black 35,
ladies and gentleman.
346
00:28:18,760 --> 00:28:20,512
High and odd, a black 35.
347
00:28:24,960 --> 00:28:27,235
Place your bets, please,
ladies and gentleman.
348
00:28:33,760 --> 00:28:35,193
No more bets, thank you.
349
00:28:38,480 --> 00:28:41,438
( BALL ROLLS AND CLATTERS)
350
00:28:51,920 --> 00:28:53,751
Place your bets, please,
ladies and gentleman.
351
00:29:00,520 --> 00:29:03,080
CROUPIER: 100 on pairs.
352
00:29:05,600 --> 00:29:07,750
100 on in pairs.
353
00:29:13,720 --> 00:29:16,520
CROUPIER: No more bets, thank you.
No more bets.
354
00:29:16,520 --> 00:29:20,120
( BALL RATTLES TO AHALT)
355
00:29:20,120 --> 00:29:24,480
CROUPIER: It's a black 31.
High and odd, black 31.
356
00:29:24,480 --> 00:29:26,440
(Sighs)
357
00:29:26,440 --> 00:29:29,512
Oh, well, easy come...
BOTH: ..easy go.
358
00:29:31,440 --> 00:29:34,400
Two grand doesn't go very far.
Not in this game, mate.
359
00:29:34,400 --> 00:29:36,840
(American gangster accent)
Join me for a drink, gentlemen.
360
00:29:36,840 --> 00:29:39,912
On me, uh, naturally.
361
00:29:48,520 --> 00:29:51,160
Come in, gentleman, come in.
Make yourselves at home.
362
00:29:51,160 --> 00:29:53,560
Come on, come in!
Grab a seat, come on!
363
00:29:53,560 --> 00:29:55,160
Drink, gentlemen,
what will you have?
364
00:29:55,160 --> 00:29:56,640
Champagne?
365
00:29:56,640 --> 00:29:59,200
Come on, Jake,
you heard the gentleman, champagne.
366
00:30:00,520 --> 00:30:02,000
What are you celebrating, huh?
367
00:30:02,000 --> 00:30:04,195
Ah, being broke again.
368
00:30:06,320 --> 00:30:07,800
( CHAMPAGNE CORK POPS )
369
00:30:07,800 --> 00:30:11,190
Hey,
you look kinda...familiar to me.
370
00:30:13,640 --> 00:30:15,835
Where before have I seen that face,
huh?
371
00:30:16,880 --> 00:30:21,320
(Girly American accent) Wow! He's
the spitting image of you, Ballsy!
372
00:30:21,320 --> 00:30:22,800
Yeah!
Yeah! (Giggles)
373
00:30:22,800 --> 00:30:24,280
Yeah?
(Girls giggle)
374
00:30:24,280 --> 00:30:27,560
The name is Balls, Balls McGee.
375
00:30:27,560 --> 00:30:30,200
This is Harry and this is Jake -
376
00:30:30,200 --> 00:30:32,560
Harry is my Australian partner
and these are...
377
00:30:32,560 --> 00:30:35,960
...these are the Patterson sisters -
the Happiness Girls!
378
00:30:35,960 --> 00:30:37,440
Hi!
Hi.
379
00:30:37,440 --> 00:30:38,560
Hi!
380
00:30:38,560 --> 00:30:42,840
Er, I'm, um, Alvin Purple
and this is Spike Dooley.
381
00:30:42,840 --> 00:30:45,360
Anyway, gentlemen,
make yourselves right at home.
382
00:30:45,360 --> 00:30:47,954
1, myself,
am gonna watch television.
383
00:30:51,880 --> 00:30:53,960
'Skippy' the bush kangaroo.
384
00:30:53,960 --> 00:30:56,840
JAKE: Not on for another 10 minutes,
yet, boss.
385
00:30:56,840 --> 00:31:00,680
I'm wanna see Skippy! I'm gonna
sit here till Skippy comes on!
386
00:31:00,680 --> 00:31:02,113
Now, go turn it on.
387
00:31:06,800 --> 00:31:09,200
Ah, what...what do you think
of Australia, Mr McGee?
388
00:31:09,200 --> 00:31:13,239
The last frontier, Mr Pikeman.
The last frontier!
389
00:31:21,120 --> 00:31:23,280
We got...we got a saying
in the States -
390
00:31:23,280 --> 00:31:25,560
er, “Go west, young man.”
391
00:31:25,560 --> 00:31:28,680
Well, you see, Mr Pikeman,
I was born in the Bronx.
392
00:31:28,680 --> 00:31:31,760
From there I went west
to West 22nd Street,
393
00:31:31,760 --> 00:31:33,920
from there, west to Kansas City,
394
00:31:33,920 --> 00:31:35,440
and from there to LA.
395
00:31:35,440 --> 00:31:37,040
Now, I ask you, Mr Pikeman,
396
00:31:37,040 --> 00:31:40,040
where else in the world
is there to go west to?
397
00:31:40,040 --> 00:31:42,395
Huh?
Australia?
398
00:31:43,720 --> 00:31:45,960
Right on the button, Mr Dooley!
399
00:31:45,960 --> 00:31:47,440
Right on the button!
400
00:31:47,440 --> 00:31:49,720
Australia, the land of Skippy!
401
00:31:49,720 --> 00:31:52,154
The bush kangaroo, huh?
402
00:31:54,640 --> 00:31:56,835
Er, what line of business are you in?
403
00:31:57,880 --> 00:32:00,599
Ah, that would be telling,
Mr Pikeman.
404
00:32:01,640 --> 00:32:06,560
Suffice it to say
that I have, er, interests -
405
00:32:06,560 --> 00:32:07,993
worldwide interests.
406
00:32:09,200 --> 00:32:11,270
(Mobsters and molls laugh)
407
00:32:12,360 --> 00:32:14,680
I take care of a lot of people
408
00:32:14,680 --> 00:32:18,355
and I take care of myself, huh?
409
00:32:19,440 --> 00:32:20,919
(Mobsters and molls laugh)
410
00:32:22,280 --> 00:32:24,440
( LONG COO-EE WHISTLE
ON TELEVISION)
411
00:32:24,440 --> 00:32:27,240
(Skippy chatters)
Hey, Boss, it's coming on now.
412
00:32:27,240 --> 00:32:29,040
What?
Skippy, Boss.
413
00:32:29,040 --> 00:32:31,998
( SKIPPY THEME SONG PLAYS )
414
00:32:50,360 --> 00:32:53,560
(Sings) # Skippy, Skippy
415
00:32:53,560 --> 00:32:58,160
# Skippy the bush kangaroo! #
All together now!
416
00:32:58,160 --> 00:33:02,040
(Mobsters and molls sing along)
# Skippy, Skippy
417
00:33:02,040 --> 00:33:06,670
# Skippy, our friend ever true. #
418
00:33:14,400 --> 00:33:17,120
That Skippy's got heart!
419
00:33:17,120 --> 00:33:20,440
Make no mistake about it,
Mr Purseman,
420
00:33:20,440 --> 00:33:23,120
they cannot
keep that little fella down.
421
00:33:23,120 --> 00:33:27,511
Hey, hey, Jake, more champagne
for Mr Purseman and Mr Dooley.
422
00:33:28,560 --> 00:33:29,993
Harry!
423
00:33:32,640 --> 00:33:34,760
Put that gun away!
424
00:33:34,760 --> 00:33:37,920
We're about to drink a toast
to the little furry fella!
425
00:33:37,920 --> 00:33:39,478
Here, I'll give you a hand.
426
00:33:42,080 --> 00:33:45,840
Ohh! Gently, Alvin. Be careful.
427
00:33:45,840 --> 00:33:47,880
I was just checking it, boss.
428
00:33:47,880 --> 00:33:49,760
(Mimics) Just checking it, boss.
429
00:33:49,760 --> 00:33:51,400
( CORK POPS )
Arghh!
430
00:33:51,400 --> 00:33:52,833
( GUNSHOT)
431
00:33:59,320 --> 00:34:03,199
W-W-What did you wanna
do that for?
432
00:34:06,040 --> 00:34:09,040
( SKIPPY THEME MUSIC )
433
00:34:09,040 --> 00:34:13,000
Are you OK, boss?
MOLL: Ballsy!
434
00:34:13,000 --> 00:34:16,960
Does it look like I'm OK, you punk?
435
00:34:16,960 --> 00:34:19,040
No!
436
00:34:19,040 --> 00:34:21,120
(Moll cries)
437
00:34:21,120 --> 00:34:25,159
To think that I went and bought it
in the...
438
00:34:26,200 --> 00:34:27,633
...the land of Skippy the...
439
00:34:28,680 --> 00:34:30,360
...b-bush kangaroo.
440
00:34:30,360 --> 00:34:33,830
(Moll sobs)
441
00:34:38,720 --> 00:34:40,360
( SKIPPY THEME SONG )
442
00:34:40,360 --> 00:34:42,240
(Sings along weakly)
# Skippy, Skipp...y... #
443
00:34:42,240 --> 00:34:45,391
SONG: # Skippy the bush kangaroo
444
00:34:47,040 --> 00:34:51,800
# Skippy, Skippy
(Molls all cry)
445
00:34:51,800 --> 00:34:54,439
# Skippy, our friend ever true. #
446
00:35:01,360 --> 00:35:04,318
( RAGTIME MUSIC)
447
00:35:21,360 --> 00:35:24,318
( MUSIC CONTINUES )
448
00:36:05,240 --> 00:36:08,880
Da...Happiness...Girls...
449
00:36:08,880 --> 00:36:10,800
Nah!
450
00:36:10,800 --> 00:36:12,400
(Coughs)
451
00:36:12,400 --> 00:36:16,473
Da...Happiness...Goils.
452
00:36:17,600 --> 00:36:21,160
Da...Happiness...Goils!
453
00:36:21,160 --> 00:36:23,120
That's good...that's good.
454
00:36:23,120 --> 00:36:25,520
Seen this?
455
00:36:25,520 --> 00:36:28,040
That's the little creep
up in 301, isn't it?
456
00:36:28,040 --> 00:36:30,320
That's right.
457
00:36:30,320 --> 00:36:34,313
Hey...isn't that him?
Yeah!
458
00:36:39,720 --> 00:36:42,234
How am I doing?
Don't ask, just keep going.
459
00:36:43,920 --> 00:36:47,071
Don't know how he could walk like this
without dislocating both hips.
460
00:36:52,720 --> 00:36:54,360
Hiya, Ballsy.
461
00:36:54,360 --> 00:36:55,793
Er...hi, hi.
462
00:37:05,720 --> 00:37:08,920
Remember the deal
Fingers proposed to you last night?
463
00:37:08,920 --> 00:37:10,680
Er...yeah.
464
00:37:10,680 --> 00:37:13,920
Well, I can better it.
Yeah?
465
00:37:13,920 --> 00:37:16,120
Provided the Weevils
don't get into the act.
466
00:37:16,120 --> 00:37:18,800
D-da Weevils?!
467
00:37:18,800 --> 00:37:22,120
Am I not getting through to you,
Ballsy?
468
00:37:22,120 --> 00:37:26,000
Well, it's not exactly that,
it's just that I don't really see
469
00:37:26,000 --> 00:37:29,320
how the Weevils
can get in on the act.
470
00:37:29,320 --> 00:37:32,198
Aha! (Laughs)
471
00:37:33,760 --> 00:37:35,920
Now I read you, now I read you!
472
00:37:35,920 --> 00:37:38,036
You are thinking of the Hatchet?
473
00:37:39,560 --> 00:37:42,120
Er...that's the one I had in mind.
474
00:37:42,120 --> 00:37:46,680
The Hatchet is no dumb bum, Ballsy,
but is that his pitch?
475
00:37:46,680 --> 00:37:51,151
He sat on the Gas House Boys...
but he's never leant on the Weevils.
476
00:37:52,920 --> 00:37:54,880
There's always the foist time.
477
00:37:54,880 --> 00:37:57,800
Good thinking, Ballsy.
478
00:37:57,800 --> 00:37:59,560
I'll get back to you.
479
00:37:59,560 --> 00:38:03,720
But remember...whatever Fingers
can offer, I can do better!
480
00:38:03,720 --> 00:38:07,560
I'll never forget what you said
the first time you got off the plane
481
00:38:07,560 --> 00:38:09,480
from the good old US of A.
482
00:38:09,480 --> 00:38:14,156
“In the protection racket,
what you need...is...”
483
00:38:16,800 --> 00:38:18,995
Come on, Ballsy! “Is...?"
(Mouths words)
484
00:38:20,080 --> 00:38:22,000
Protection!
Yes!
485
00:38:22,000 --> 00:38:25,600
(Laughs) You never said
a truer word!
486
00:38:25,600 --> 00:38:27,716
The locals are still trying
to absorb it.
487
00:38:30,200 --> 00:38:31,633
I'll see you later.
488
00:38:41,240 --> 00:38:43,117
Place your bets, please,
ladies and gentlemen.
489
00:38:47,440 --> 00:38:49,590
Ah...red, nine.
490
00:38:52,960 --> 00:38:54,520
That's placed.
491
00:38:54,520 --> 00:38:55,953
100 on pair.
492
00:38:57,360 --> 00:38:58,793
No more bets.
493
00:39:00,760 --> 00:39:02,320
And it's a red nine.
494
00:39:02,320 --> 00:39:03,833
Red nine's the winner.
495
00:39:07,120 --> 00:39:10,000
You've got a good PR machine, McGee.
496
00:39:10,000 --> 00:39:12,680
Saw a picture of you
in the paper this morning.
497
00:39:12,680 --> 00:39:14,880
Said you were here to look us over.
498
00:39:14,880 --> 00:39:19,160
You don't wanna believe everything
you read in the newspapers, Fingers.
499
00:39:19,160 --> 00:39:22,040
Yes. I'd have put it
the other way around.
500
00:39:22,040 --> 00:39:25,080
I thought it was us
who was looking you over.
501
00:39:25,080 --> 00:39:28,120
Hey...I wouldn't talk to McGee
like that, Fingers.
502
00:39:28,120 --> 00:39:30,839
What's the matter?
Don't you feel yourself?
503
00:39:31,920 --> 00:39:33,640
Never in public.
504
00:39:33,640 --> 00:39:36,000
Very funny, fat boy.
505
00:39:36,000 --> 00:39:39,080
Keep that up and I'll reduce you
to a quivering pulp.
506
00:39:39,080 --> 00:39:41,800
Promises, promises.
507
00:39:41,800 --> 00:39:44,640
Cool it, Jake! Cool it!
508
00:39:44,640 --> 00:39:49,400
Er...er...l don't, er, believe, Fingers,
that I've had the pleasure
509
00:39:49,400 --> 00:39:51,400
of, er, um, meeting with the lady.
510
00:39:51,400 --> 00:39:54,640
Oh...Boobs la Touche.
511
00:39:54,640 --> 00:39:56,800
Balls, this is Boobs.
512
00:39:56,800 --> 00:40:00,240
Boobs...this is Balls.
513
00:40:00,240 --> 00:40:03,160
I am very happy to meet you.
514
00:40:03,160 --> 00:40:06,520
CROUPIER: Place your bets, please,
ladies and gentlemen. 10 on red 30.
515
00:40:06,520 --> 00:40:08,840
Just keep your eye on the wheel,
McGee.
516
00:40:08,840 --> 00:40:14,280
I can see you want my relationship
with Miss la Touche
517
00:40:14,280 --> 00:40:17,238
to be strictly business, Fingers.
518
00:40:19,600 --> 00:40:22,600
Don't bite off
more than you can chew.
519
00:40:22,600 --> 00:40:25,000
It might interfere
with your mastication.
520
00:40:25,000 --> 00:40:28,400
Oh, I think I can pull it off,
Fingers.
521
00:40:28,400 --> 00:40:31,198
I said 'mastication'.
522
00:40:33,080 --> 00:40:34,638
No more bets.
523
00:40:38,880 --> 00:40:40,480
(High-pitched voice)
Listen here, Fingers.
524
00:40:40,480 --> 00:40:42,360
If he goes, I go! Got that?!
525
00:40:42,360 --> 00:40:45,640
What ARE you talking about,
Dwart?!
526
00:40:45,640 --> 00:40:47,800
You know very well
what I'm talking about!
527
00:40:47,800 --> 00:40:50,200
You won't find me
too easy to replace.
528
00:40:50,200 --> 00:40:53,440
I'm sure it'd be impossible.
There couldn't be two of you.
529
00:40:53,440 --> 00:40:55,840
There's hardly enough
to go around as it is.
530
00:40:55,840 --> 00:40:58,040
I've got a message for you, Fingers.
531
00:40:58,040 --> 00:41:00,360
Yes, keep away from
knobbly little gnomes.
532
00:41:00,360 --> 00:41:02,440
Can't somebody
stub him in an ashtray?
533
00:41:02,440 --> 00:41:03,920
Listen here, Fingers...
534
00:41:03,920 --> 00:41:05,990
Oh, run along,
you boring little person.
535
00:41:07,520 --> 00:41:08,953
Ooh!
536
00:41:10,240 --> 00:41:14,040
(French accent) Oh, Fingers,
that was very cruel. He has got feelings.
537
00:41:14,040 --> 00:41:17,112
Well, only tiny feelings. (Laughs)
538
00:41:19,520 --> 00:41:21,400
Place your bets, please,
ladies and gentlemen.
539
00:41:21,400 --> 00:41:22,880
All bets down, please.
540
00:41:22,880 --> 00:41:24,393
$20 on red 32.
541
00:41:26,560 --> 00:41:28,240
You realise, McGee,
542
00:41:28,240 --> 00:41:31,040
that if you intend to operate
in the Southern Hemisphere
543
00:41:31,040 --> 00:41:33,040
it's me you have to deal with.
544
00:41:33,040 --> 00:41:36,396
I'd like to operate
on both hemispheres, Fingers.
545
00:41:38,080 --> 00:41:40,200
I'm warning you, McGee.
546
00:41:40,200 --> 00:41:42,120
It's my territory.
547
00:41:42,120 --> 00:41:45,396
Alright, gentlemen. Can we leave it
there and get down to business?
548
00:42:02,080 --> 00:42:05,320
Well, gentlemen,
now that we have warmed our veins
549
00:42:05,320 --> 00:42:07,440
with a little spirited competition,
550
00:42:07,440 --> 00:42:10,200
shall we remind ourselves
of why we are here?
551
00:42:10,200 --> 00:42:13,840
One - a casino,
presumably impregnable.
552
00:42:13,840 --> 00:42:18,280
Two - a safe containing $2 million,
give or take $100,000.
553
00:42:18,280 --> 00:42:20,160
Gentlemen...
554
00:42:20,160 --> 00:42:22,993
...what an invitation, hmm?
555
00:42:24,360 --> 00:42:27,360
If we don't rise to the challenge
and crack it,
556
00:42:27,360 --> 00:42:29,240
then no criminal
in the Southern Hemisphere
557
00:42:29,240 --> 00:42:31,680
will be able
to hold his head up again.
558
00:42:31,680 --> 00:42:34,840
Nor anything else, for that matter.
559
00:42:34,840 --> 00:42:37,080
Oh, really!
560
00:42:37,080 --> 00:42:41,080
What are you doing there,
you miserable little microbe?!
561
00:42:41,080 --> 00:42:44,720
I've got a right to be here.
I'm still working for you!
562
00:42:44,720 --> 00:42:46,400
Not on this job, you're not.
563
00:42:46,400 --> 00:42:50,359
This is big-time, Dwart,
and you're strictly small-time.
564
00:42:56,040 --> 00:42:58,200
Fingers, that was very unkind.
565
00:42:58,200 --> 00:42:59,680
He has his uses.
566
00:42:59,680 --> 00:43:02,800
Yes, possibly
sitting in somebody's front garden
567
00:43:02,800 --> 00:43:04,800
on a concrete toadstool.
568
00:43:04,800 --> 00:43:06,870
Up!
569
00:43:08,000 --> 00:43:10,720
Well, now, where were we?
570
00:43:10,720 --> 00:43:12,600
Oh, yes. The plan.
571
00:43:12,600 --> 00:43:16,560
At exactly 4:00am
the alarms will be cut,
572
00:43:16,560 --> 00:43:18,880
and the electronic eye
will cease to operate.
573
00:43:18,880 --> 00:43:20,360
And the guards?
574
00:43:20,360 --> 00:43:24,400
I've arranged that they're...
taken care of.
575
00:43:24,400 --> 00:43:26,360
Who checked it out?
The Hatchet.
576
00:43:26,360 --> 00:43:28,040
How come he's not here now?
577
00:43:28,040 --> 00:43:31,640
Well, now...how shall I put this?
578
00:43:31,640 --> 00:43:34,552
He, ah, became a little...difficult.
579
00:43:36,640 --> 00:43:37,920
So?
580
00:43:37,920 --> 00:43:40,720
So we had to send him
on a long holiday.
581
00:43:40,720 --> 00:43:43,792
An extended vacation.
582
00:43:45,640 --> 00:43:49,240
Er...the thing that bothers me,
Fingers,
583
00:43:49,240 --> 00:43:52,800
is how come you wanna
cut us in on the action?
584
00:43:52,800 --> 00:43:54,280
I need men.
585
00:43:54,280 --> 00:43:56,840
What about using
one of your own boys?
586
00:43:56,840 --> 00:43:59,240
I mean, I know the Hatchet is out...
587
00:43:59,240 --> 00:44:01,120
Yeah...what about Loopy Snieder
and the Weevils?
588
00:44:01,120 --> 00:44:02,760
For that matter,
what about Dwart?
589
00:44:02,760 --> 00:44:06,040
I know he's only three feet high,
but you used him before.
590
00:44:06,040 --> 00:44:08,000
Well, I'll tell you.
591
00:44:08,000 --> 00:44:10,760
I want to get a foot in
with the multinationals.
592
00:44:10,760 --> 00:44:12,440
That's why I chose you, McGee.
593
00:44:12,440 --> 00:44:15,000
Good thinkin', Fingers,
good thinkin'.
594
00:44:15,000 --> 00:44:17,680
There may be a lot of things
wrong with America,
595
00:44:17,680 --> 00:44:21,160
but it's still the best place
in the world to sell out to.
596
00:44:21,160 --> 00:44:22,640
Am I right?
597
00:44:22,640 --> 00:44:24,400
It's a deal!
598
00:44:24,400 --> 00:44:27,920
Well, gentlemen,
I suggest you check your watches.
599
00:44:27,920 --> 00:44:30,040
It is now 9:00pm.
600
00:44:30,040 --> 00:44:32,280
We will all assemble
in the cabaret room
601
00:44:32,280 --> 00:44:34,680
in time for the 2:00am floor show.
602
00:44:34,680 --> 00:44:36,160
In the meantime...
603
00:44:36,160 --> 00:44:39,789
...I suggest you...take it easy.
604
00:44:43,600 --> 00:44:45,556
(Murmurs softly) # Skippy
605
00:44:48,200 --> 00:44:50,509
# Skippy
606
00:44:52,880 --> 00:44:55,713
# Skippy the... #
607
00:44:57,800 --> 00:44:59,280
Oh, that's nice.
608
00:44:59,280 --> 00:45:01,350
Oh, baby...
609
00:45:15,000 --> 00:45:16,880
Shouldn't we be getting some rest?
610
00:45:16,880 --> 00:45:19,519
Don't you find this restful?
611
00:45:23,080 --> 00:45:26,840
Yeah, of course, it's just that
we've got a long night ahead of us.
612
00:45:26,840 --> 00:45:28,720
Maybe we should get some shut-eye.
613
00:45:28,720 --> 00:45:30,517
My eyes are closed.
614
00:45:35,720 --> 00:45:39,280
You might find me
a bit disappointing.
615
00:45:39,280 --> 00:45:41,680
I may not measure up
to Mr McGee's standard.
616
00:45:41,680 --> 00:45:43,193
Why not?
617
00:45:46,320 --> 00:45:50,960
Well...people are different. They come
in different shapes and sizes...
618
00:45:50,960 --> 00:45:54,236
I know! That's what makes life fun.
619
00:45:58,120 --> 00:45:59,640
What, the differences?
620
00:45:59,640 --> 00:46:03,918
No, the shapes and sizes.
621
00:46:26,480 --> 00:46:28,040
What?!
622
00:46:28,040 --> 00:46:29,473
It's my turn.
623
00:47:04,280 --> 00:47:06,080
What are you doing here?
624
00:47:06,080 --> 00:47:09,356
Well...1 just thought it'd be nice.
625
00:47:10,720 --> 00:47:12,360
W-What the hell's going on?
626
00:47:12,360 --> 00:47:13,793
Huh?
627
00:47:15,880 --> 00:47:18,120
Look, I-I find your, er...
628
00:47:18,120 --> 00:47:22,000
...your behaviour perfectly, er...
629
00:47:22,000 --> 00:47:23,560
...outrageous.
630
00:47:23,560 --> 00:47:27,000
Well, I don't think it's any worse
631
00:47:27,000 --> 00:47:29,280
than what you're
gonna be doing tonight.
632
00:47:29,280 --> 00:47:31,032
What do you mean?
633
00:47:32,280 --> 00:47:36,910
Well, I mean breaking into someone's
safe in the middle of the night.
634
00:47:38,920 --> 00:47:42,040
Well, that's breaking and entering,
isn't it?
635
00:47:42,040 --> 00:47:44,156
Is it?
636
00:47:46,000 --> 00:47:49,436
I don't think you can pull it off
like Ballsy could.
637
00:47:50,640 --> 00:47:53,438
Yeah, I'm beginning to have
my doubts too.
638
00:47:54,760 --> 00:47:58,548
Come on...come on, let's try.
639
00:48:11,480 --> 00:48:12,913
No.
640
00:48:14,120 --> 00:48:16,076
What?
I said no.
641
00:48:21,120 --> 00:48:24,715
What if I won't take no
for an answer?
642
00:48:26,360 --> 00:48:27,840
Nancy...
643
00:48:27,840 --> 00:48:30,040
...have pity on me!
644
00:48:30,040 --> 00:48:32,080
What have I ever done to you?
645
00:48:32,080 --> 00:48:36,560
Look, I'm forced at gunpoint
to front up as Balls
646
00:48:36,560 --> 00:48:39,840
so that you and the others
can inherit the Balls McGee empire.
647
00:48:39,840 --> 00:48:41,360
Yeah!
648
00:48:41,360 --> 00:48:45,080
But do I have to inherit
his domestic arrangements as well?
649
00:48:45,080 --> 00:48:48,320
(American gangster accent) I mean,
you gotta draw the line somewhere, babe.
650
00:48:48,320 --> 00:48:51,720
I haven't got the stomach,
let alone the rest of the anatomy,
651
00:48:51,720 --> 00:48:53,440
to handle it.
652
00:48:53,440 --> 00:48:56,440
(Sobs)
653
00:48:56,440 --> 00:48:57,920
What's wrong?
654
00:48:57,920 --> 00:49:01,120
Why am I so different?
655
00:49:01,120 --> 00:49:03,998
Well...you're not different.
656
00:49:06,000 --> 00:49:08,720
You were nice to Cindy and Mandy.
657
00:49:08,720 --> 00:49:10,440
Oh, Jesus!
658
00:49:10,440 --> 00:49:11,919
(Continues sobbing)
659
00:49:15,320 --> 00:49:17,470
Oh, don't, Nancy...don't.
660
00:49:25,120 --> 00:49:27,240
Here we go again.
661
00:49:27,240 --> 00:49:29,360
You've gotta admit,
he must have something.
662
00:49:29,360 --> 00:49:32,193
Ah, he doesn't look
any great shakes to me.
663
00:49:45,840 --> 00:49:47,796
( KNOCK AT DOOCR )
664
00:50:00,080 --> 00:50:01,720
Who is it?
665
00:50:01,720 --> 00:50:03,640
It's the house detective.
666
00:50:03,640 --> 00:50:05,760
I'd like to speak to Mr McGee.
667
00:50:05,760 --> 00:50:08,752
Er...just a minute,
I'll go and get him.
668
00:50:09,920 --> 00:50:12,036
You...Harry.
669
00:50:17,360 --> 00:50:19,316
Quick! Get dressed.
670
00:50:46,360 --> 00:50:47,918
(Coughs)
671
00:50:48,960 --> 00:50:51,160
Ah, so you're Mr McGee?
672
00:50:51,160 --> 00:50:53,160
(American gangster accent)
Er, that's right, yeah.
673
00:50:53,160 --> 00:50:55,840
Sorry to disturb you
at this late hour, Mr McGee,
674
00:50:55,840 --> 00:50:58,960
but there are two matters
that I'd like to clear up.
675
00:50:58,960 --> 00:51:03,160
A gun was reported to have gone off
in this suite last night...
676
00:51:03,160 --> 00:51:05,720
...and also one of our guests,
a Mr Purple,
677
00:51:05,720 --> 00:51:08,720
has unaccountably disappeared.
678
00:51:08,720 --> 00:51:10,280
Er, Mr Purple, huh?
679
00:51:10,280 --> 00:51:14,400
Well, as I understand it, he was
last seen in your company, sir.
680
00:51:14,400 --> 00:51:15,833
Er...er...
681
00:51:16,920 --> 00:51:20,680
W-w-well, let me set, er, your mind
at, er, rest, er, sir.
682
00:51:20,680 --> 00:51:25,240
Mr Purple is, er, currently
in the bathroom and, er,
683
00:51:25,240 --> 00:51:28,480
as for that gunshot that you heard
that was, er...
684
00:51:28,480 --> 00:51:30,038
...well, that was a real laugh.
685
00:51:31,400 --> 00:51:34,680
Er, that was nothing more
than a champagne cork going off.
686
00:51:34,680 --> 00:51:36,113
Er, pop!
687
00:51:38,320 --> 00:51:42,200
Well, could I see Mr Purple?
688
00:51:42,200 --> 00:51:44,080
Er...
689
00:51:44,080 --> 00:51:48,560
...well, I'd go and get him, er,
except for the fact that he is, er,
690
00:51:48,560 --> 00:51:53,953
engaged in matters of a very, um, er,
personal nature.
691
00:51:56,280 --> 00:51:57,713
I'll wait.
692
00:52:20,880 --> 00:52:23,269
(Normal voice)
Er, what can I do for you?
693
00:52:28,560 --> 00:52:31,920
Um...has anyone ever told you
that you bear a...
694
00:52:31,920 --> 00:52:34,840
...a strange resemblance
to Mr McGee?
695
00:52:34,840 --> 00:52:38,040
Er, yeah. Everyone says that.
Er, don't they, Jake?
696
00:52:38,040 --> 00:52:40,156
Yeah, boss. I mean, sure, Alvin.
697
00:52:41,520 --> 00:52:45,638
Where is Mr McGee?
(Calls) Er, Mr McGee?!
698
00:52:47,480 --> 00:52:51,758
Maybe I better go in
and, er, bring him out.
699
00:53:02,960 --> 00:53:06,280
(Gangster voice) Oh, sorry, sir.
I'm just taking a bath.
700
00:53:06,280 --> 00:53:07,713
A bath?
701
00:53:08,760 --> 00:53:11,400
Ballsy's a very impulsive man,
Detective.
702
00:53:11,400 --> 00:53:14,840
When he gets an urge
to do something, he just does it.
703
00:53:14,840 --> 00:53:16,320
Anywhere.
704
00:53:16,320 --> 00:53:18,200
Er, you'll have to excuse Mr McGee.
705
00:53:18,200 --> 00:53:20,395
He's, er, in the bath.
706
00:53:24,040 --> 00:53:25,678
With one of the ladies.
707
00:53:27,560 --> 00:53:29,800
Oh, he is, eh?
708
00:53:29,800 --> 00:53:32,200
What do you want to see him for?
709
00:53:32,200 --> 00:53:34,360
Er, well, I-1...I don't rightly know.
710
00:53:34,360 --> 00:53:38,200
I, er...l feel that I would
like to see you and Mr McGee
711
00:53:38,200 --> 00:53:41,590
in the, er, same room...
at the same time.
712
00:53:44,680 --> 00:53:47,920
Well, er...just a peek.
713
00:53:47,920 --> 00:53:51,320
He's in a rather, er,
intimate situation at the moment,
714
00:53:51,320 --> 00:53:54,120
if you, er...understand what I mean?
715
00:53:54,120 --> 00:53:55,553
Eh?
716
00:54:00,360 --> 00:54:01,793
Shh!
717
00:54:20,840 --> 00:54:22,320
Half his luck.
718
00:54:22,320 --> 00:54:25,840
What would you say if I asked you
into a bath like that?
719
00:54:25,840 --> 00:54:28,752
Well, I'd say you'd be stiff,
Detective.
720
00:54:39,320 --> 00:54:41,240
We've gotta get rid of that body!
721
00:54:41,240 --> 00:54:43,240
Right. Spike, give him a hand.
722
00:54:43,240 --> 00:54:46,437
Make it snappy. We've gotta be
in the cabaret in 10 minutes.
723
00:54:50,880 --> 00:54:52,552
(LOUD MUSIC PLAYS)
724
00:54:58,760 --> 00:55:02,840
(Sings) # See the magic on my wall
725
00:55:02,840 --> 00:55:06,160
# From the movies
and amusement halls
726
00:55:06,160 --> 00:55:10,280
# I've got an Edward G.
and a Monroe still
727
00:55:10,280 --> 00:55:14,720
# Dreaming is cheap
and I've had my fill
728
00:55:14,720 --> 00:55:18,600
# Come the day
when the time is right
729
00:55:18,600 --> 00:55:22,960
# Using feelings,
born of sound and sight
730
00:55:22,960 --> 00:55:26,520
# I'm an actor but I've got no part
731
00:55:26,520 --> 00:55:29,760
# Don't need no lines 'cause
they're right here in my heart
732
00:55:29,760 --> 00:55:33,800
# And it's all in the way
that they use my face
733
00:55:33,800 --> 00:55:37,760
# Finding a friend
who can take my place
734
00:55:37,760 --> 00:55:41,360
# All in the way
that they use my face
735
00:55:41,360 --> 00:55:43,640
# And I see myself...
736
00:55:43,640 --> 00:55:47,269
# ..on the shelf some day
737
00:55:54,000 --> 00:55:57,480
# It's been a while
Still no role to play
738
00:55:57,480 --> 00:56:01,760
# City streets and lonely bars
that crowd my day
739
00:56:01,760 --> 00:56:05,320
# Thoughts of fantasy
and love supreme
740
00:56:05,320 --> 00:56:09,680
# Riding on a charger
with a movie queen
741
00:56:09,680 --> 00:56:13,200
# Phoned my lady
but there's no-one there
742
00:56:13,200 --> 00:56:17,120
# Dressing up and sitting round
and going nowhere
743
00:56:17,120 --> 00:56:20,920
# Lost her to a writer
of some TV show... #
744
00:56:20,920 --> 00:56:24,400
(German accent) I don't like to be
the bearer of bad news, Ballsy...
745
00:56:24,400 --> 00:56:28,313
...but I got it on the grapevine
the Hatchet is after you.
746
00:56:30,680 --> 00:56:32,600
W-Who told you dat?
747
00:56:32,600 --> 00:56:36,080
I'm sorry, Ballsy,
I cannot reveal my sources,
748
00:56:36,080 --> 00:56:38,913
but don't say I didn't warn you.
749
00:56:43,920 --> 00:56:45,558
I'm glad you like it.
750
00:56:50,600 --> 00:56:53,400
Is there no escape?
751
00:56:53,400 --> 00:56:55,800
This is your last chance, Fingers.
752
00:56:55,800 --> 00:56:58,760
Will I never be rid of you,
you tedious little gnome?
753
00:56:58,760 --> 00:57:00,680
I won't ask you again.
754
00:57:00,680 --> 00:57:02,557
Do you swear it?
755
00:57:03,600 --> 00:57:05,880
Ohh!
756
00:57:05,880 --> 00:57:07,518
Always overacting.
757
00:57:18,960 --> 00:57:22,400
# Cross the street
and buy a magazine... #
758
00:57:22,400 --> 00:57:26,520
Look, how reliable is dat, er,
Loopy Snieder?
759
00:57:26,520 --> 00:57:29,160
He'll give you the inside dope
on everybody, McGee.
760
00:57:29,160 --> 00:57:31,320
In fact, he is the inside dope.
761
00:57:31,320 --> 00:57:33,151
He used to be in an asylum.
762
00:57:34,440 --> 00:57:37,034
I-1-I'm relieved to hear dat, er,
Fingers.
763
00:57:38,560 --> 00:57:42,200
# Dress me and direct me
and I could look just the same
764
00:57:42,200 --> 00:57:46,000
# As a man that swims a river,
who alone can win the war
765
00:57:46,000 --> 00:57:50,200
# There's a million of us hoping
that you'll open one small door
766
00:57:50,200 --> 00:57:54,120
# And it's all in the way
that they use my face
767
00:57:54,120 --> 00:57:57,960
# Finding a friend
who can take my place
768
00:57:57,960 --> 00:58:01,520
# It's all in the way
that they use my face
769
00:58:01,520 --> 00:58:03,840
# And I see myself...
770
00:58:03,840 --> 00:58:05,360
# ..on the shelf
771
00:58:05,360 --> 00:58:09,440
# And it's all in the way
that they use my face
772
00:58:09,440 --> 00:58:13,520
# Finding a friend
who can take my place
773
00:58:13,520 --> 00:58:16,840
# It's all in the way
that they use my face
774
00:58:16,840 --> 00:58:19,080
# And I see myself...
775
00:58:19,080 --> 00:58:20,680
# ..on the shelf
776
00:58:20,680 --> 00:58:25,000
# And it's all in the way
that they use my face
777
00:58:25,000 --> 00:58:28,120
# All in the way
that they use my face
778
00:58:28,120 --> 00:58:31,880
# It's all in the way
All in the way they use my face
779
00:58:31,880 --> 00:58:35,640
# All in the way
All in the way that they use my face
780
00:58:35,640 --> 00:58:38,916
# All in the way. #
( APPLAUSE AND CHEERING )
781
00:58:42,960 --> 00:58:45,520
We leave at the end
of the magician's act.
782
00:58:51,040 --> 00:58:52,040
Shit.
783
00:58:52,040 --> 00:58:54,960
What's happened?
The magician's cabinet.
784
00:58:54,960 --> 00:58:57,920
(Whispers) What's the matter?
That's where we stuck Balls's body.
785
00:58:57,920 --> 00:59:00,840
What are you two carrying on about?
786
00:59:00,840 --> 00:59:03,880
Nothing that won't keep, Fingers.
787
00:59:03,880 --> 00:59:06,840
Not so sure of that.
Pretty much on the nose now.
788
00:59:06,840 --> 00:59:09,240
MAGICIAN: Ladies and gentlemen,
for this disappearing act
789
00:59:09,240 --> 00:59:12,280
I shall need a volunteer
from the audience.
790
00:59:12,280 --> 00:59:14,640
Whilst I can guarantee your safety,
791
00:59:14,640 --> 00:59:18,000
remember, nobody comes out
of the disappearing cabinet
792
00:59:18,000 --> 00:59:20,200
exactly the same
as they went into it.
793
00:59:20,200 --> 00:59:25,000
It will be a magical experience
that will change your life.
794
00:59:25,000 --> 00:59:28,760
Perhaps, er, you, sir, would, er,
care to assist us
795
00:59:28,760 --> 00:59:31,240
in an exhibition of the mystic arts?
796
00:59:31,240 --> 00:59:33,120
Um, no, thank you, no.
797
00:59:33,120 --> 00:59:36,320
Oh, surely the great McGee
isn't chickening out.
798
00:59:36,320 --> 00:59:39,440
Oh, well, no...
it's just, er, not my style.
799
00:59:39,440 --> 00:59:43,831
I'm sure our American friend
will be only too happy to assist you.
800
00:59:46,320 --> 00:59:48,276
( APPLAUSE AND CHEERING )
801
00:59:57,160 --> 00:59:59,920
Ladies and gentlemen,
what you are about to witness
802
00:59:59,920 --> 01:00:04,280
is one of the greatest disappearing acts
ever performed in public.
803
01:00:04,280 --> 01:00:06,760
First performed
by the famed Houdini,
804
01:00:06,760 --> 01:00:09,120
it has puzzled audiences
all over the world
805
01:00:09,120 --> 01:00:10,680
for over half a century.
806
01:00:10,680 --> 01:00:14,000
The essence of what is about
to happen is its simplicity.
807
01:00:14,000 --> 01:00:17,080
Our volunteer
will enter the empty cabinet,
808
01:00:17,080 --> 01:00:19,440
the door will be closed upon him
809
01:00:19,440 --> 01:00:22,040
and, from a distance of three paces,
810
01:00:22,040 --> 01:00:27,760
I will utter the magic spell
that will cause his body to vanish.
811
01:00:27,760 --> 01:00:29,240
Don't worry, sir.
812
01:00:29,240 --> 01:00:32,200
Although your body will vanish
from inside the cabinet,
813
01:00:32,200 --> 01:00:37,000
you will experience
no physical discomfort whatever
814
01:00:37,000 --> 01:00:40,440
and we will return you
as soon as possible.
815
01:00:40,440 --> 01:00:42,000
Ladies and gentlemen,
816
01:00:42,000 --> 01:00:45,160
as this act requires
the utmost in concentration
817
01:00:45,160 --> 01:00:48,560
from both myself and our volunteer,
818
01:00:48,560 --> 01:00:51,916
I must ask that you all
remain absolutely silent.
819
01:00:53,440 --> 01:00:55,400
You are ready, sir?
820
01:00:55,400 --> 01:00:57,356
Naturally.
( DRUM ROLL )
821
01:01:00,600 --> 01:01:02,033
(Audience laughs)
822
01:01:11,680 --> 01:01:13,113
(Audience laughs)
823
01:01:18,080 --> 01:01:22,800
Abracadabra! Sim sala bim!
824
01:01:22,800 --> 01:01:26,920
Ladies and gentlemen,
a mystic spell has been uttered
825
01:01:26,920 --> 01:01:30,560
and, as you will see,
our volunteer has vanished.
826
01:01:30,560 --> 01:01:32,630
( CYMBAL CRASHES)
(Audience gasps)
827
01:01:35,080 --> 01:01:36,513
Jesus.
828
01:01:38,600 --> 01:01:40,033
That's blown it.
829
01:01:47,080 --> 01:01:48,680
Hah...ah...
830
01:01:48,680 --> 01:01:51,080
.ladies and gentlemen,
831
01:01:51,080 --> 01:01:55,840
um, the Great Maldini, at this,
the moment of his greatest triumph,
832
01:01:55,840 --> 01:01:57,440
feels absolutely weak,
833
01:01:57,440 --> 01:02:01,520
the very universal energy
drained from his veins.
834
01:02:01,520 --> 01:02:04,240
As you can see,
this man is clinically dead.
835
01:02:04,240 --> 01:02:05,720
(Audience mutters)
836
01:02:05,720 --> 01:02:07,200
If there were time,
837
01:02:07,200 --> 01:02:11,240
the Great Maldini would ask you to
come up, all of you, one...a-a-all,
838
01:02:11,240 --> 01:02:14,200
and...and feel his pulse
'cause there's not a drop of vein.
839
01:02:14,200 --> 01:02:17,200
But it's not an experience
for the faint of heart.
840
01:02:17,200 --> 01:02:20,160
So instead
he will put him into the cabinet
841
01:02:20,160 --> 01:02:24,280
and with a "sim' and a 'bim...sala'
close the doors
842
01:02:24,280 --> 01:02:29,840
and...completely, without a moment
of hesitation or delay,
843
01:02:29,840 --> 01:02:32,520
restore him to life
before our very eyes.
844
01:02:32,520 --> 01:02:34,476
Abracadabra.
( DRUM ROLL)
845
01:02:38,360 --> 01:02:40,920
( CYMBAL CRASHES)
(Audience gasps)
846
01:02:40,920 --> 01:02:42,876
(Audience applauds and cheers)
847
01:02:45,160 --> 01:02:49,199
And a big hand
for the Great Maldini's magic feat.
848
01:03:12,160 --> 01:03:15,640
Ohh! I thought I'd lost you, McGee.
849
01:03:15,640 --> 01:03:20,040
Well, gentlemen,
shall we be moving on? Hmm?
850
01:03:20,040 --> 01:03:25,520
Well, we've had the entree,
shall we now try the main course?
851
01:03:25,520 --> 01:03:28,239
I must slip into
my working jewellery.
852
01:03:38,560 --> 01:03:41,916
FINGERS: Ohh! Cut yourself shaving?
(Mumbles angrily)
853
01:04:10,200 --> 01:04:11,920
( MUTED BEEPING )
854
01:04:11,920 --> 01:04:13,440
The electronic eye's still on.
855
01:04:13,440 --> 01:04:16,920
I thought it had been taken care of!
So did I. Somebody's goofed.
856
01:04:16,920 --> 01:04:19,600
I'll blast it.
What?! Are you out of your mind?
857
01:04:19,600 --> 01:04:23,513
Well? What do we do now, McGee?
858
01:04:31,280 --> 01:04:33,236
( MUTED BEEPING QUICKENS )
859
01:04:36,040 --> 01:04:37,996
( SINISTER MUSIC )
860
01:04:44,040 --> 01:04:45,640
( BEEPING STOPS )
861
01:04:45,640 --> 01:04:49,960
I've got to hand it to you, McGee.
First that act upstairs, now this.
862
01:04:49,960 --> 01:04:52,440
Tell me, how do you do it?
863
01:04:52,440 --> 01:04:56,592
Er, an old pro never gives away
any secrets, er, Fingers.
864
01:05:15,720 --> 01:05:18,757
48.. left...
865
01:05:19,840 --> 01:05:22,559
...25...right...
866
01:05:23,680 --> 01:05:27,116
...and 21.. left...
867
01:05:35,840 --> 01:05:37,400
I don't understand it!
868
01:05:37,400 --> 01:05:39,720
It's just not my day.
869
01:05:39,720 --> 01:05:41,480
That's the combination.
870
01:05:41,480 --> 01:05:42,913
Over to you, McGee.
871
01:05:47,640 --> 01:05:49,790
( DRAMATIC MUSIC )
872
01:05:55,560 --> 01:05:58,711
Cop that, you boring big people!
873
01:06:07,360 --> 01:06:09,240
Please, Dwart, don't shoot me.
874
01:06:09,240 --> 01:06:11,320
I've always liked you very much.
875
01:06:11,320 --> 01:06:13,080
You're only saying that.
876
01:06:13,080 --> 01:06:15,913
No, really. Here let me show you.
877
01:06:16,960 --> 01:06:19,320
Let me out! Let me out of here!
878
01:06:19,320 --> 01:06:21,960
You've done it again, McGee.
Open this door!
879
01:06:21,960 --> 01:06:24,440
Beautifully executed.
Come on! Let me out!
880
01:06:24,440 --> 01:06:28,718
A classic...doublecross.
Let me out!
881
01:06:30,280 --> 01:06:33,480
Come on! Let me out of here!
882
01:06:33,480 --> 01:06:34,913
Open this door!
883
01:06:37,800 --> 01:06:39,392
( SINISTER MUSIC )
884
01:06:46,600 --> 01:06:49,239
It's the bloody Hatchet!
Let's get out of here!
885
01:06:50,440 --> 01:06:52,840
Hey? What are we gonna do?!
Let's split up.
886
01:06:52,840 --> 01:06:55,000
We'll go in the car of Balls.
Alright.
887
01:06:55,000 --> 01:06:57,036
Meet at the airport at 9:00.
888
01:07:11,120 --> 01:07:12,600
That was close.
889
01:07:12,600 --> 01:07:15,000
If you'd warned me the Hatchet
was after us...
890
01:07:15,000 --> 01:07:16,760
Loopy warned you. That is crazy.
891
01:07:16,760 --> 01:07:19,200
He and the Weevils
are going to kill you.
892
01:07:19,200 --> 01:07:20,680
What the hell for?
893
01:07:20,680 --> 01:07:22,920
Because you made the deal
with Fingers.
894
01:07:22,920 --> 01:07:24,840
Oh, no.
Don't worry.
895
01:07:24,840 --> 01:07:26,320
They won't find us here.
896
01:07:26,320 --> 01:07:28,276
( ROMANTIC MUSIC)
897
01:07:37,040 --> 01:07:41,960
SONG: # I won't ask
I don't need no reason why
898
01:07:41,960 --> 01:07:47,240
# Could be a throw of dice
or a spaceship in the sky
899
01:07:47,240 --> 01:07:53,000
# My poor old head's so full of you
and I need you by my side
900
01:07:53,000 --> 01:07:57,760
# I'd almost say tomorrow,
“Come on, baby, just let it ride”
901
01:07:57,760 --> 01:08:03,320
# Sweet stranger,
make me sing and make me smile
902
01:08:03,320 --> 01:08:09,000
# Sweet stranger,
let me make it all worthwhile
903
01:08:09,000 --> 01:08:13,120
# Sweet stranger,
knowing there ain't no end
904
01:08:13,120 --> 01:08:15,280
# Come on, baby,
let me be your friend
905
01:08:15,280 --> 01:08:17,760
# Taking it easy, make it easy
906
01:08:17,760 --> 01:08:20,360
# One more time
907
01:08:20,360 --> 01:08:23,200
# Ooh-ooh-ooh
908
01:08:23,200 --> 01:08:25,920
# Ooh-ooh-ooh
909
01:08:25,920 --> 01:08:28,760
# Ooh-ooh-ooh
910
01:08:28,760 --> 01:08:31,520
# Ooh-ooh-ooh
911
01:08:31,520 --> 01:08:36,960
# Sweet stranger,
make me sing and make me smile
912
01:08:36,960 --> 01:08:42,400
# Sweet stranger,
let me make it all worthwhile
913
01:08:42,400 --> 01:08:46,240
# Sweet stranger,
knowing there ain't no end
914
01:08:46,240 --> 01:08:48,400
# Come on,
let me be your friend
915
01:08:48,400 --> 01:08:51,240
# Taking it easy, make it easy
916
01:08:51,240 --> 01:08:53,515
# One more time. #
917
01:09:05,040 --> 01:09:08,000
What will we, er, do
for the next couple of hours?
918
01:09:08,000 --> 01:09:09,479
Very simple.
919
01:09:21,360 --> 01:09:23,316
( ROMANTIC MUSIC)
920
01:09:28,240 --> 01:09:30,880
You know that time
at the roulette table?
921
01:09:30,880 --> 01:09:34,080
I knew you could not be Balls McGee.
922
01:09:34,080 --> 01:09:36,760
Why didn't you say something?
923
01:09:36,760 --> 01:09:39,513
I couldn't really
put my finger on it.
924
01:09:41,160 --> 01:09:43,276
And you think you can now?
925
01:09:45,480 --> 01:09:47,600
I know I can.
926
01:09:47,600 --> 01:09:49,033
And I will.
927
01:09:59,560 --> 01:10:01,516
( BIRDSONG )
928
01:10:06,880 --> 01:10:09,838
( MILITARY-STYLE DRUMMING )
929
01:10:19,080 --> 01:10:22,038
( SOMBRE, DIGNIFIED MUSIC )
930
01:11:07,800 --> 01:11:10,758
( MACHINE-GUN FIRE )
931
01:11:16,440 --> 01:11:19,160
( MACHINE-GUN FIRE CONTINUES )
932
01:11:19,160 --> 01:11:21,116
( MACHINE-GUN FIRE STOPS )
933
01:11:28,920 --> 01:11:30,760
(Gasps)
934
01:11:30,760 --> 01:11:32,520
Let's get out of here!
935
01:11:32,520 --> 01:11:34,476
( CAR ENGINE STARTS )
936
01:11:40,360 --> 01:11:43,318
( RAPID MACHINE-GUN FIRE )
937
01:11:55,160 --> 01:11:57,116
( MACHINE-GUN FIRE )
938
01:12:01,120 --> 01:12:02,553
Shit!
939
01:12:20,240 --> 01:12:21,720
Huh!
940
01:12:21,720 --> 01:12:24,678
( MACHINE-GUN FIRE )
941
01:12:32,040 --> 01:12:34,998
( MACHINE-GUN FIRE CONTINUES )
942
01:12:47,360 --> 01:12:50,318
(Laughs maniacally)
943
01:12:52,640 --> 01:12:54,120
Shit!
944
01:12:54,120 --> 01:12:55,553
( TYRES SQUEAL )
945
01:12:59,640 --> 01:13:01,596
( TYRES SQUEAL )
946
01:13:24,240 --> 01:13:26,000
(Laughs maniacally)
947
01:13:26,000 --> 01:13:27,558
( MACHINE-GUN FIRE )
948
01:13:28,920 --> 01:13:31,514
( TYRES SQUEAL )
949
01:13:51,480 --> 01:13:53,320
( MACHINE-GUN FIRE )
950
01:13:53,320 --> 01:13:54,275
Damn!
951
01:14:01,480 --> 01:14:03,480
( TYRES SQUEAL )
952
01:14:03,480 --> 01:14:05,040
( ENGINE STOPS )
953
01:14:05,040 --> 01:14:06,473
(Revs engine)
954
01:14:08,400 --> 01:14:09,992
(Laughs triumphantly)
955
01:14:15,040 --> 01:14:17,156
(Alvin revs engine)
956
01:14:36,040 --> 01:14:38,474
(Growls and mutters)
957
01:14:40,920 --> 01:14:42,433
( TYRES SQUEAL )
958
01:14:43,960 --> 01:14:46,235
( MACHINE-GUN FIRE )
959
01:15:03,200 --> 01:15:04,633
Ha ha ha!
960
01:15:17,960 --> 01:15:20,918
( MACHINE-GUN FIRE )
961
01:15:28,440 --> 01:15:31,960
(Laughs maniacally)
962
01:15:31,960 --> 01:15:33,598
( MACHINE-GUN FIRE )
(Screams)
963
01:15:35,640 --> 01:15:37,915
( TYRES SQUEAL )
964
01:15:58,640 --> 01:16:01,598
( FREE-FORM JAZZ MUSIC )
965
01:16:15,000 --> 01:16:17,680
I thought you'd never make it!
But we did.
966
01:16:17,680 --> 01:16:19,320
Not THAT sort of making it.
967
01:16:19,320 --> 01:16:23,760
P.A.: Last call for passengers
on TAA flight 427 to Sydney.
968
01:16:23,760 --> 01:16:26,000
This flight
is now ready for departure.
969
01:16:26,000 --> 01:16:28,958
(JAZZ MUSIC CONTINUES )
970
01:16:47,040 --> 01:16:49,998
( JAZZ MUSIC CONCLUDES )
971
01:17:10,160 --> 01:17:11,878
Does, er, that look better?
972
01:17:21,240 --> 01:17:23,160
So that's the Hatchet, eh?
973
01:17:23,160 --> 01:17:25,037
Eugh.
974
01:17:40,920 --> 01:17:44,960
Don't turn around now,
but you see those two men with Boobs?
975
01:17:44,960 --> 01:17:47,080
We've gotta get rid of them both.
976
01:17:47,080 --> 01:17:48,560
What about Boobs?
977
01:17:48,560 --> 01:17:50,120
Boobs too.
978
01:17:50,120 --> 01:17:52,031
They were all at the robbery.
979
01:17:55,200 --> 01:17:58,158
( UPBEAT FUNKY MUSIC)
980
01:18:20,280 --> 01:18:22,960
Hey, am I imagining it
or are we being followed?
981
01:18:22,960 --> 01:18:24,440
You're imagining it.
982
01:18:24,440 --> 01:18:27,120
I know it must be pretty dull
and ordinary, Alvin,
983
01:18:27,120 --> 01:18:29,280
now you're not a stand-in gangster
anymore.
984
01:18:29,280 --> 01:18:31,714
I'll tell you, though -
it's a good deal healthier.
985
01:18:32,760 --> 01:18:34,318
(Fires machine-gun)
986
01:18:41,480 --> 01:18:42,435
(Laughs)
987
01:18:45,400 --> 01:18:48,039
( TYRES SQUEAL )
988
01:18:58,440 --> 01:18:59,953
( GUNFIRE )
989
01:19:07,040 --> 01:19:08,800
Out of the way!
Jeez!
990
01:19:08,800 --> 01:19:11,314
(Fires gun)
(Screams)
991
01:19:14,920 --> 01:19:17,878
( HORN BLARES )
992
01:20:07,200 --> 01:20:08,880
( GUNSHOT)
993
01:20:08,880 --> 01:20:11,280
(Groans)
( COMICAL SOUNDS )
994
01:20:11,280 --> 01:20:14,238
( FUNKY PERCUSSIVE MUSIC)
995
01:20:17,000 --> 01:20:18,480
Oh-oh-OHHHH!
996
01:20:18,480 --> 01:20:20,436
( BRAKES SCREECH )
997
01:20:23,160 --> 01:20:24,593
(Snarls)
998
01:20:47,480 --> 01:20:50,438
( CLOCK CHIMES THE HOUR )
999
01:20:57,320 --> 01:20:58,753
( BEEP!)
1000
01:21:02,760 --> 01:21:04,560
(Screams)
( HORSE NEIGHS )
1001
01:21:04,560 --> 01:21:05,993
(CYMBALS CRASH )
1002
01:21:14,840 --> 01:21:17,120
( BOING!)
Watch where you're going, furry!
1003
01:21:17,120 --> 01:21:19,560
Sorry, mate.
You want a knuckle sandwich, ya mug?
1004
01:21:19,560 --> 01:21:21,440
If you're making it.
( BEEP!)
1005
01:21:21,440 --> 01:21:23,080
You bloody great lump!
1006
01:21:23,080 --> 01:21:26,038
( COMICAL MUSIC)
1007
01:21:41,680 --> 01:21:43,636
( BOING!)
1008
01:21:54,200 --> 01:21:55,840
( TWANG! )
1009
01:21:55,840 --> 01:21:57,796
( MUSIC STOPS )
1010
01:22:08,080 --> 01:22:11,038
( COMICAL MUSIC RESUMES )
1011
01:22:13,800 --> 01:22:15,438
( BANG!)
1012
01:22:28,120 --> 01:22:29,553
(Fires gun)
1013
01:22:32,320 --> 01:22:35,278
( SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
1014
01:22:42,520 --> 01:22:44,000
( GUNSHOT)
(Groans)
1015
01:22:44,000 --> 01:22:45,480
You got me!
1016
01:22:45,480 --> 01:22:48,950
Just a fluke, lady.
A damn lucky shot.
1017
01:22:52,720 --> 01:22:56,000
( COMICAL MUSIC)
1018
01:22:56,000 --> 01:22:57,513
(Fires gun)
1019
01:23:09,040 --> 01:23:11,076
zz
Ugh! Ugh! (e22P)
1020
01:23:13,520 --> 01:23:15,320
Not bad, darling.
1021
01:23:15,320 --> 01:23:16,912
You're improving.
1022
01:23:18,800 --> 01:23:20,358
( COMICAL MUSIC)
Arggh!
1023
01:23:23,720 --> 01:23:26,678
( MILITARY BUGLE MUSIC)
1024
01:23:28,320 --> 01:23:29,753
Hey, Hatchet!
1025
01:23:30,920 --> 01:23:32,353
( BOING!)
1026
01:23:33,720 --> 01:23:35,278
Oh, oh... Whoaaa!
1027
01:23:38,480 --> 01:23:40,480
( BOINNNG! )
1028
01:23:40,480 --> 01:23:45,679
(Weakly) Now you see the value
of constant practice.
1029
01:23:50,440 --> 01:23:53,080
Are you comfortable, sir?
Oh, yes, thanks.
1030
01:23:53,080 --> 01:23:56,720
Well, anything you want,
just press your Hostess Call button.
1031
01:23:56,720 --> 01:23:58,995
I'll be at the back of the plane.
1032
01:24:01,440 --> 01:24:03,360
Careful, Alvin.
1033
01:24:03,360 --> 01:24:04,960
I wouldn't advise it, boy.
1034
01:24:04,960 --> 01:24:06,840
I'd hate to think what would happen
1035
01:24:06,840 --> 01:24:09,520
if you came up against Boobs
on a dark night.
1036
01:24:09,520 --> 01:24:11,600
Pistols? Stilettos? Hatchets?
1037
01:24:11,600 --> 01:24:13,240
I mean, she'd stop at nothing.
1038
01:24:13,240 --> 01:24:15,440
Now, Spike, don't be awful.
1039
01:24:15,440 --> 01:24:17,400
You know how I feel for Alvin.
1040
01:24:17,400 --> 01:24:19,800
I thought that hostess
was pretty attractive.
1041
01:24:19,800 --> 01:24:23,760
Can't you restrain yourself
just this once for me, Alvin?
1042
01:24:23,760 --> 01:24:25,398
Alright. Ill try.
1043
01:24:26,960 --> 01:24:30,350
What I want now
is some peace and quiet for us both.
1044
01:24:31,400 --> 01:24:33,630
I hope you don't find that
too boring.
1045
01:24:38,320 --> 01:24:40,276
(Laughs maniacally)
1046
01:24:42,600 --> 01:24:44,556
(Continues laughing)
1047
01:24:45,800 --> 01:24:47,800
( MANIC LAUGHTER ECHOES )
1048
01:24:47,800 --> 01:24:50,758
( UPBEAT MUSIC)
1049
01:24:53,400 --> 01:24:55,240
SONG: # Hey, Alvin
1050
01:24:55,240 --> 01:24:57,595
# Though you're on your way
1051
01:24:58,640 --> 01:25:00,760
# Wingin' through the air
1052
01:25:00,760 --> 01:25:02,751
# It's a brand-new day
1053
01:25:03,800 --> 01:25:05,711
# Alvin, come what may
1054
01:25:08,600 --> 01:25:10,158
# Oh, Alvin
1055
01:25:11,200 --> 01:25:13,191
# How you've been through it all!
1056
01:25:14,240 --> 01:25:16,760
# Thieves and guns and guys and dolls
1057
01:25:16,760 --> 01:25:18,320
# Havin' such a ball
1058
01:25:18,320 --> 01:25:20,834
# Or are you bound to have a fall?
1059
01:25:24,200 --> 01:25:25,680
# Why?
1060
01:25:25,680 --> 01:25:28,911
# Why, why does it have to be you?
1061
01:25:30,200 --> 01:25:32,000
# I ask you, already
1062
01:25:32,000 --> 01:25:33,480
# Why?
1063
01:25:33,480 --> 01:25:37,029
# Why, why does it have to be you?
1064
01:25:40,440 --> 01:25:42,600
# You tried to avoid it
1065
01:25:42,600 --> 01:25:44,560
# Did your best not to attend
1066
01:25:44,560 --> 01:25:46,960
# But they wooed you
and they pursued you
1067
01:25:46,960 --> 01:25:49,120
# And they got you in the end
1068
01:25:49,120 --> 01:25:50,600
# Why?
1069
01:25:50,600 --> 01:25:53,751
# Why, why did it have to be you?
1070
01:25:56,840 --> 01:25:58,760
# Alvin
(Girls sing) # Alvin
1071
01:25:58,760 --> 01:26:00,591
# You're in love -
there"s no doubt
1072
01:26:02,120 --> 01:26:03,920
# Can you last the distance?
1073
01:26:03,920 --> 01:26:05,560
# Let it all hang out?
1074
01:26:05,560 --> 01:26:07,040
# Ha ha - that's
1075
01:26:07,040 --> 01:26:09,110
# That's what it's all about
1076
01:26:12,160 --> 01:26:13,920
# Alvin
# Alvin
1077
01:26:13,920 --> 01:26:16,480
# We wish you all the best
1078
01:26:16,480 --> 01:26:19,080
# Knowing the stock you're made of
1079
01:26:19,080 --> 01:26:21,360
# We know you'll stand the test
1080
01:26:21,360 --> 01:26:23,040
# But please
1081
01:26:23,040 --> 01:26:24,520
# Give it a rest
1082
01:26:24,520 --> 01:26:26,112
(Laughs)
1083
01:26:27,160 --> 01:26:28,640
# Why
1084
01:26:28,640 --> 01:26:32,600
# Why, why does it have to be you?
1085
01:26:32,600 --> 01:26:34,080
# Oh, yeah
1086
01:26:34,080 --> 01:26:35,560
# Jump back
1087
01:26:35,560 --> 01:26:37,040
# Why
1088
01:26:37,040 --> 01:26:40,350
# Why, why does it have to be you?
1089
01:26:44,040 --> 01:26:45,520
# Why?
1090
01:26:45,520 --> 01:26:48,600
# Why does it have to be you?
1091
01:26:48,600 --> 01:26:50,760
# Why couldn't it have been
Big Julie?
1092
01:26:50,760 --> 01:26:52,520
# Or Harry the Horse?
1093
01:26:52,520 --> 01:26:54,560
# Or Louie the Lip?
1094
01:26:54,560 --> 01:26:56,760
# Why does it have to be you?
1095
01:26:56,760 --> 01:26:58,193
# Hey, Alvin
1096
01:27:00,000 --> 01:27:01,480
# Why?
1097
01:27:01,480 --> 01:27:05,029
# Why couldn't it have been me,
already?
1098
01:27:08,120 --> 01:27:12,989
# Why does it have to be you? #
77815
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish (Latin American)
Swedish
Tajik
Tatar
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof