Original subtitles

(gentle music)

(machine whirring)

(gentle music)

(ominous music)

(air whooshing)

(air whooshing)

(ominous music)

(ominous music continues)

(ominous music continues)

(ominous music continues)

(ominous music fades)

(stairs creaking)

(coughing)

(fire crackling)

(coughing)

- Is someone there?

(ominous music)

(panting)

Margot, I thought I heard you sneaking around.

What are you doing up so late?

(coughs)

- Nothing.

- What you got there?

A little snack?

I haven't seen my little girl in a while.

Is everything okay?

Let me look at you.

Are you gonna make me walk

all the way over there in my weak state?

(coughs)

Margot!

Where are you going?

(glass shatters)

- Oh my God. What happened?

- He fell.

- Honey, what are you doing up out of bed?

Margot, come help me clean this up.

Margot, get over here now!

- She was running from me.

She's afraid of me.

- No.

- My own daughter's afraid of me.

My own daughter.

(Margot gasps)

(water running)

- Mom, that's disgusting. I drink that too.

Can you help me clean a little?

Pilot's coming in for dinner tonight.

I want this place to look not like a shit hole.

And can whoever that is not be here, please?

- What kind of name is Pilot anyway?

- It's a nickname. - What's his real name?

- Paul. - And how old is Paul?

Oh Jesus.

- Stop, he's not that much older.

- 30, 40? Could I date him?

- Oh, stop, Ew, no.

He's 30 something.

- Why can't you date boys your own age?

- Because boys are immature

- And a 30 something year old with a nickname is mature?

- Mature enough to have a job, money, and a car,

which is a lot more than I could say about some people.

- You're growing up so fast, honey.

Too fast.

- Somebody has to.

Are you gonna help me clean or not?

- Yeah, sure, sure.

As soon as I can find an asprin.

- I'll take care of that headache, darling.

- Oh my God. Baby, again?

(laughs)

(dishes clinking)

(water running)

- What up? - Hey, Pilot.

- What's all this? - Cedar planks, plywood.

- I know what it is. What's it for?

- Oh, I'm putting a playhouse in the backyard.

- You a little old for a playhouse?

- For my daughter.

- It's gonna be one hell of a playhouse.

- So, wait here, I'll be right back.

- Yep.

You all right, Eli?

It looks a little fucked up in here.

- [Eli] I mean, McKayla left, took Reagan,

went to her parents.

- Wait, like, left for good?

- [Eli] That's what she says.

You know anyone that wants a piano?

I can't stand the thing.

And she doesn't even play,

it just sits there without a purpose.

- So, wait, what happened? - She found my stash,

read a couple texts.

One thing led to another

and she figured out that I don't exactly pay for this house

with an honest day's work.

- So, what are you gonna do? - I don't know.

Business is good.

Got three pretty big drops tonight alone.

- Yeah, women. - Mm. Yeah.

500. - Yep. Oh yeah.

Well, she'll be back.

- All right, we'll see.

- Hey, can I hit the bathroom before I get outta here?

- You're not gonna take a shit, are you?

- It's between me and God.

- Hello and welcome to another episode

of "Zombie Playhouse".

I'm your host, Casper Credence,

AKA CC, AKA Captain Cannibal.

Now, for those of you who don't know,

today marks a celebratory episode, our 100th.

(audience applauding)

It's a milestone to say the least,

and we couldn't have done it without the support

of our loyal listeners, so thank you.

Let's get right into this.

Okay, so I'm gonna start with something

'cause it's been on my mind.

Recently, I've received quite a few emails

and messages regarding zombie sightings in the area.

Now, for the record, I get these all the time,

but these particular sightings are interesting

because they all have one thing in common.

See if you can guess what that is.

One loyal listener wrote , " While walking

my dog in Hideaway Park yesterday ,

I was chased by a man who was bleeding

from the eyes and groaning ."

Sounds like me after a light jog .

Here's another one.

"Hey, big fan.

Anyway, I think I almost ran over a zombie

in Hideaway Park yesterday

before he disappeared into the woods."

I'm not making this up.

These are emails from different people.

Okay, here's one more.

" A mutilated homeless man tried to bite me in the bathroom

at Hideaway Park ."

Have you guessed the commonality ?

If you said Hideaway Park,

then you win a prize. (audience applauding)

Now, look, if this is part of some prank

to help me ring in my centennial episode,

well then it was well coordinated and bravo to you.

But if this is not a prank, if these sightings are real ,

if the living dead walk among us, then ...

Then we're in some serious shit.

(gentle music)

Hey, Eli, heard about what happened between you and McKayla.

I'm sorry, man. That's gotta hurt.

- Do me a favor and just focus on your monster show

instead of my relationship.

- It's a zombie podcast, you know that.

I told you literally a million times.

- Guess I wasn't listening.

- What's your problem with me all the time?

I just try to be nice and neighborly to you.

- It's annoying that you know every little thing

that's going on because you don't have a life.

- It's on her social media, dude.

- Like, I don't even know how old you are,

but you gotta be too old to live with your mom,

and your fascination with make-believe creatures,

it's not normal.

- Don't come running to me when there's a zombie apocalypse.

- You see? That's what I mean.

You actually go to sleep at night

with that thought in your fucking head.

- It could happen. - Okay, let's say it could.

Let's say it does.

What are you gonna do about it?

What is Casper gonna do about it?

You gonna save the world? You?

- You know what?

I'm not getting into this with right now.

You're putting your negative bullshit onto me

and I got a hot date tonight, I don't need that.

- Your mom's not hot.

- [Casper] Asshole.

- You know, my ex and I actually met at a church,

if you can believe it.

But ironically, we never attended together as a family.

Did Margot tell you about her father?

- No, she didn't.

- Mom. - What?

- He didn't come over to hear depressing stories.

- Oh, you didn't?

Anyway, it's not depressing, it's just life.

He died of cancer when she was 10.

- I didn't know. I'm sorry.

- It was very aggressive.

He was in a lot of pain.

- Jesus. Spare him the details.

- No, I don't mind. - Well, I mind.

- Margot doesn't like people talking about stuff like that.

She doesn't want people to feel sorry for her,

so she doesn't really mention it.

- Margot also doesn't like when people talk about her

when she's present.

- What about your parents?

- You don't have to answer her.

- Oh, come on.

Some people actually like talking about their family.

- Okay.

My dad's dead and my mom's an alcoholic.

Did I miss anything?

- Margot, Don't be a bitch! - Mom!

- My parents divorced when I was a kid, actually.

- Well, I am sorry to hear that, Pilot.

- No, it's totally fine.

I mean, it was a long time ago and they both got remarried.

Stepdad is cool, stepmom's a little crazy,

but you know, like, it's fine.

They'll make it work.

- Should I call you Paul or Pilot?

'Cause I feel a little silly calling you Pilot,

if I'm being honest.

- You can call me Paul.

- Why do people call you Pilot anyway?

- He flew for the Air Force.

- You did? - Yeah.

- Yep.

- Well, and here I was thinking it was just

a silly nickname.

Well, thank you for your service, Paul, the pilot.

Cheers.

- Cheers. - Cheers.

Such a fucking embarrassment.

I did warn you though.

- I didn't think she was that bad.

- You're right, it could have been a lot worse.

- So, do you think that she believes that I flew

in the Air Force?

- You mean you didn't? - No.

But I can take you to the sky if you'd like.

- Ooh, I'd love to fly.

- Well, then let me give you wings.

(Margot chuckles)

(music playing)

(music continues playing)

- You make me forget about everything.

I love that.

- What are your dreams, Margot?

- Dreams? - Yeah.

- Dreams are reserved for people

who don't have to worry about getting evicted

from their homes.

I spend my time in reality, for the most part.

My mom can't even hold down a job.

It's been that way since my dad died.

- Are you two close? - Yeah.

I mean, I know we were,

but most of my memories of him are when he was sick,

towards the end when he was dying.

That's all I see when I try to remember him.

His body had wasted away

and what was left was

a zombie pretty much.

- That sounds awful.

- Yeah.

- Hey, what if I could help you?

- That's sweet, but I couldn't take your money.

- No, no, no, not my money.

- What?

(ominous music)

(insects chirping)

(phone beeps)

- [woman] Eli, this is the third time

I'm leaving you a message .

I know you're avoiding us.

- [man] Stop avoiding your mother .

- [mother] McKayla's a wonderful girl . I know you

two can work this out .

Oh, poor Reagan. Call me back .

(car engine humming)

(ominous music)

(ominous music continues)

- Sorry I'm late.

- I've been here 20 minutes already.

- I told you I'm sorry.

What do you want? A written apology or something?

- I just don't like sitting here alone in a work van

with drugs on me.

You know I hate coming here.

- Chill, Eli.

Nobody comes out here this late.

(Eli sighs)

- Just check out the accessories in the side pockets.

Just do it when you get home.

- It's a lot of damn money.

- You don't trust me, Bo?

- I don't trust nobody.

- You know, next time I'm not gonna trust you

when you say you'll be somewhere at a certain time.

- Do you want my money or not?

(leaves rustling)

What was that?

You got somebody with you?

- Probably just a coyote or something.

Where are you going?

- [Bo] Hello?

- Just gimme the bag, dude.

- You filming us. - Whoa. What the fuck?

- You got somebody filming me? Huh?

You get popped. You a fucking narc?

- What is this? - You tell me.

- You trying to shake me down?

- You trying to get me on camera, narc?

- Okay, you're high. - That may be,

but I know what I heard, and that ain't a coyote.

Oh, you know what?

You wanna film me?

I'm gonna film you. How you like that shit, huh?

- Just gimme the back so I can leave.

You wanna stick around, be my guest?

(growling) Watch out!

(screaming)

(growling)

(ominous music continues)

(growling)

(ominous music continues)

(Bo screaming)

(leaves rustling)

Damn it.

(ominous music continues)

(Bo gurgling)

(ominous music continues)

Oh God.

(Bo gurgling)

(ominous music continues)

(Bo gurgling)

(gunshot booming)

(ominous music continues)

(growling)

(Eli grunting)

(Eli screaming)

(gunshot booming)

(Eli panting)

(suspenseful music)

(car engine whirring)

(suspenseful music continues)

- Okay, so Eli keeps his stash somewhere upstairs

and his wife is staying at her mom's and he's out,

so now's the perfect time to do it.

- I usually wait at least six months into a relationship

before I start robbing houses.

- Right. Well, I like to move fast.

I'm not talking about robbing him blind, you know,

just like take a little bit.

He's a drug dealer.

The dude makes more in one day than we do in six months.

- And you want me to go in there with you?

- Yeah.

- And do what? Keep a lookout?

- Yeah, and like toss shit around.

I don't know, throw pillows.

- You want me to throw pillows?

- Yeah, break stuff. - Like what?

- There's a piano.

- You want me to break a piano?

How do we even do that?

- I don't know.

You know, toss shit around, throw pillows.

Just make sure it doesn't look staged.

- Are you serious?

You really wanna rob this guy?

- Yeah, I do.

- [Margot] How convenient that the window's unlocked.

- [Pilot] I unlocked it this afternoon.

All right, bear hug. - Okay.

(both grunting)

- Ready? - Yep.

- Yep, I got you.

(Margot laughing)

Okay, all right, all right, all right.

We go to the left.

- Wait, does he have any pets?

Dogs?

- Oh shit.

He has an alligator that lives upstairs in his bathtub.

- Dick. - No, it's fine.

It's a baby, it's like five feet long.

It won't even bother you if you...

Oh, wait, he does have cameras by his front and back door

that alert his cell phone.

Just make sure we just,

we just gotta leave the same way we came back in.

- Is that the piano? - Yep.

- It's nice. I don't wanna break it.

- Okay, then just like mess it up in there

and just make sure it doesn't look staged.

- All right, just go upstairs and do what you gotta do

before the drugs wear off

and I realize what the fuck I'm doing.

- Okay.

(grunts)

(objects ruffling)

Ow!

(sighs)

(grunts)

(ominous music)

(ominous music continues)

(pillow thuds)

(ominous music continues)

(door clicks)

(tool thuds)

(ominous music continues)

(door clicks)

Hey. - What the hell's that?

- He's got a safe, but it's bolted in the wall,

so we just gotta...

- Are you gonna take it?

- Do you know how to crack safes?

- We can't just walk out of here with his safe.

- We can do whatever we want. - You just said-

- Wait, duck down. Come here.

(car engine whirring)

- No, no, no, no, no.

(door clicks)

(Eli panting)

- Oh, fuck.

Shit.

What are we gonna do?

- We're gonna wait, okay?

He's probably going to leave again.

- No, something went wrong.

There's blood, and a lot of it.

- I know. I saw that.

(Eli panting)

(liquid swirling)

(Eli grunts)

- I don't wanna be here.

- We just need to keep it together, all right?

We're gonna be fine.

He's going to leave again.

- You don't know that.

- What if he decides to make a fucking sandwich?

We gotta get outta here.

(Eli panting)

(flesh squelching)

- [Eli] Ah shit.

(liquid pouring)

(Eli grunts)

- Shit.

(objects rustling)

(money rustling)

- [Pilot] Fuck.

- What the...

- [Bo] Gonna film me ? I'm gonna

film you. How you like that shit, huh ?

- [Eli] Just gimme the bag so I can leave . You wanna

stick around, be my guest .

Watch out !

(Bo screaming)

(ominous music)

(growling)

(ominous music continues)

Oh God .

(dramatic music)

(ominous music)

(bag rustling)

(suspenseful music)

- Oh, hey, hey, hey.

What are you doing? - Did you hear that?

- Yeah. - What was it?

- I think it was like an animal dying or something.

(bag rustling)

- Okay, he's upstairs, we should go now.

- Hold on. Just wait a minute.

- What do you mean, "Wait a minute?"

(keypad beeping)

- There's like $10,000 in each of those envelopes.

- That he's taking upstairs to put in his safe

that we can't open.

(gun thuds)

We have no idea what just happened.

He could be in some serious shit.

He's bleeding. What if he killed someone?

What if people are after him?

- Okay, okay. Shh.

- Fuck this.

(gun clanks)

- Jesus, McKayla. What the fuck are you doing?

- I told you I was coming by this weekend

to get some of my shit.

Just chill.

- Yeah, well, now's not really a good time, okay?

- Who is that? - It's his wife.

- You said she was at her mother's?

- That's what he told me.

- We're so fucked.

- Eli, what happened to your stomach?

- Oh, shit.

Look, it's been a rough night, okay?

- Let me see.

What happened?

- This crazy homeless man bit me.

- You really need to get this looked at.

- I know. I will. - Like soon.

- Yeah, I know. - Like tonight.

Ugh, it's oozing.

- You're the one wanting to look at it.

- Yeah, and I'm glad I did because that shit is infected.

- Infected?

- A bite doesn't just have to come from an animal

to cause an infection.

A human bite can be just as dangerous,

especially one from a homeless person.

- How dangerous? - I dunno.

Hepatitis B, hepatitis C, herpes,

AIDS, rabies even. - AIDS?

- Look it up. - I can't go to the hospital.

- Why not?

- Because they're gonna ask questions.

- And? - And...

It happened, it happened during a transaction.

- A drug deal.

So, what? The buyer just attacked you?

- No, not the buyer, it was somebody else.

- Who? - I don't know.

He was just there.

He attacked the buyer and then me and then...

- And what?

- I shot him.

- Oh my God, you shot someone?

- What do you want me to say?

I had to protect myself.

- Is he dead?

Eli, is he dead? - Yes, I'm pretty sure.

- Okay, what about the buyer?

- He's really dead.

- What does that mean? - I knew it.

He killed somebody.

I told you. - Shh.

- Bag so I can leave.

If you wanna stick around - - What is this ?

- Be my guest . (zombie growling)

- [Eli] Watch out !

(Bo screaming)

(growling)

(growling)

- Okay, turn it off. - Are you watching?

- Just turn it the fuck off!

What was wrong with him?

- Bath salts maybe.

- Yeah, well, he looked like a zombie.

- Yeah, well then I guess that would make me a zombie.

I'm quitting, Mick, I'm done.

I have enough money to do whatever we wanna do.

- Eli, is someone gonna come after you?

- No.

- What if they think you killed him?

Wait, did you take his money?

- Well, I wasn't just gonna leave it there.

Look, look, this guy, the buyer, he's my only contact.

He gets ahold of me when he wants shit,

and that's the extent of it.

Nobody's coming after me.

Mick, this is a sign for me to get out.

- [Margot's dad] Look, I think if anything is a sign, it's this .

There's already been three cases of cancer

and one of the guys is younger than me .

- And they're sure they got it from the factory?

- They said it's from the solvents.

And I know we wear masks, but you know, after time,

I'm sure that they don't work.

- [Margot's mother] Have you had any symptoms?

- Other than the cough I've had,

I guess I've been a little lightheaded sometimes.

- What are you gonna do for work if you quit?

- I will figure something out. - For less money.

- Look, there are more important things than money, okay?

Like that little girl upstairs,

and I wanna be around to walk her down the aisle.

Okay?

(coughs)

- I always told myself that as soon as I had enough money

and investments set aside for Reagan, I'd stop.

Tonight put me where I need to be.

Tonight, this ends.

Mick, we can get past this.

(suspenseful music)

- Ow! What the fuck? - I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

I don't know what happened.

- You're scaring me.

I really think we need to take you to a hospital.

Eli. - No hospital!

(Eli panting)

- You should have the combination of my safe

in case anything happens to me.

It's 08, 19, 72.

You wanna write it down?

- 08,19,72. I got it.

Fine. All right.

Happy?

- There's almost 80 grand in there

and another 50 in product.

I'll give you the number

to a guy you can offload it to for 40.

(Eli panting)

- Where are you going? - Bathroom.

(Eli gagging)

(continues gagging)

Oh, that's not good.

(toilet flushes)

(Eli panting)

(continues panting)

(sighs)

(glass thuds)

- Okay, they're both gone

and we have the combination, 8,19,72.

- We can't take it. - What?

- You heard him, he's done.

If we take his money,

he'll have to break his word

and keep doing what he's doing.

- That's not our problem. - And what if he's right?

What if something does happen to him?

Where's that gonna leave his wife and daughter?

They're gonna need that money.

- Nothing is going to happen to him.

Look, I got news for you, all right?

He's not done, even if he says he is.

- What the...

(ominous music)

(people chattering)

(car door thumps)

(both laughing)

- That was so bad.

- Thank God.

I was afraid to say anything in case you liked it.

- My local church puts on scarier stuff than that.

- My nephew's third grade class had better set designing

in their school play.

- I mean, they literally had trash bags taped to the walls.

- I'm so sorry I brought you all the way out here for that.

I read good reviews.

- It's okay.

I'm having a great time making fun of it.

- Good. Good.

I'm having a great time too.

I'm so sorry. - It's fine. It's fine.

- What? - Is everything okay?

- I don't know. (phone buzzing)

Oh, do you mind if I take this?

- Of course not. Go ahead, yeah.

- Thanks.

Hello? - Jesus Christ.

Thank God you finally answered.

I've been calling and calling.

I left you messages. I'm fucking freaking out.

- Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Slow down. Who is this?

- It's Eli, your neighbor.

- Eli, how'd you get this number?

- From your website, the podcast page,

Zombie Playhouse or whatever.

- Yeah, so what do you want?

I'm kind of busy right now.

- I don't know. Advice. - Advice about what?

- About, you know, zombies.

- Is this something we can talk about later?

- No, it's not.

How should I put this?

So, about an hour ago,

I was attacked by a man and he bit me.

- Oh God. Is it bad?

Are you bleeding? - Yes. Yes, I'm bleeding.

I have a temperature, my heart rate is slow.

I'm fucking puking up black shit.

- Listen, I can't talk about this right now,

but you should definitely go to the ER, okay?

Good luck and I'll talk to you later.

(phone beeping)

- Hello? Casper?

Hello?

- Who was that? - My neighbor.

He thinks he got bit by a zombie.

- Oh - Yeah.

- Huh. - Look, he might fly straight

for a little while, but look,

don't let the bullshit

that he's feeding her feed into you too, all right?

- What about the bullshit you fed me?

Trying to take his whole safe

after you said that you weren't gonna try to rob him blind.

- Okay, well, now we have the combination.

- No, where are you going? - He's in the bathroom,

she's in the living room, I have to go do it now.

- Are you crazy?

- Look, we're gonna communicate through text, okay?

I'll tell you when I have the money.

You just warn me if they're coming.

No, don't go. Don't go out there.

- I'm not gonna take it all, all right?

Calm down.

- Shit.

(stairs creaking)

(panting)

(bag rustling)

- I feel like getting some ice cream.

Do you want some ice cream?

I like to get ice- - Don't you think you

should answer the phone? - No, he's messing with me.

He thinks what I do is a joke.

- Would he be calling you this much if it was a joke?

- Yes, you don't know him.

He's one of those guys that...

Hey, don't.

- Hello? - Man.

- Who's this? - This is Georgia. Who's this ?

- Where's Casper? - He's right here.

It's for you.

- Thanks. - Welcome.

chuckling)

(suspenseful music)

- Oh shit.

- Eli, I get 20 phone calls a week

from people who think they're zombies.

It's actually a segment on my show.

- Maybe they were telling you the truth.

- Do you have any idea the impact

that one zombie would have on the entire world?

- That's why I'm calling you.

(suspenseful music continues)

(crowbar thuds) (Pilot grunts)

(McKayla groans)

(suspenseful music continues)

(Pilot grunts)

(suspenseful music continues)

If you don't believe me,

take a trip to Hideaway Park and see for yourself.

- Wait, Hideaway Park. Did you say Hideaway Park?

- Yeah.

- What's at Hideaway Park, Eli?

- That thing that bit me.

I shot him, or it, or whatever the fuck it was.

His body is at Hideaway Park.

(McKayla groaning)

- Hey, can we video chat?

I wanna take a look at that bite.

(body thuds)

(suspenseful music continues)

- Oh my God.

Baby? Baby?

McKayla? McKayla?

Come on, baby.

No!

(Eli speaking faintly)

(suspenseful music continues)

(Margot gasps)

Why'd you take the moeny

(Eli sobbing)

- Eli, are you there? Eli?

(phone ringing)

(phone continues ringing)

(Eli sighs)

(phone ringing)

Come on, man. I don't know what happened.

- I thought you didn't care. - He mentioned Hideaway Park.

- What's that? - Hideaway Park

is a public park area

where some of my listeners have reported seeing a zombie.

And where there's smoke- - There's fire.

Why would there be a zombie at a public park?

- There's a CDC building near there.

Center for Disease Control. - And?

- And neuroscience, neurotoxins,

and neurological research have all been linked

to the re-animation of the brain.

Hmm. - What?

- I guess I just always pictured outta the ground

Ramiro zombies when the time came.

- (chuckles) You're such a nerd.

Oh my God.

(phone ringing)

(phone continues ringing)

- Hey, I don't know what happened .

Are you okay ?

Eli? Eli?

- You know, my grandmother

was the most religious person I've ever met,

went to church every week her whole life.

I doubt she missed a mass.

She prayed before every meal,

read the Bible every night before bed .

She quoted

scriptures for just about any occasion.

When she got stomach cancer,

the pain was so unbearable that she did something

that nobody thought she was capable of.

She killed herself.

Now, if anyone believes that the price for suicide

was eternal damnation, it was her.

But in the end, it didn't matter.

She gave up all her convictions to stop the pain

because she believed she was already dead.

And if you're already dead, is it really suicide ?

- Whoa. Whoa.

Wait, just wait a second.

I know where you're going with this, and just wait.

Don't do anything stupid. Let's talk this out.

Let's evaluate our options .

- Options? What options?

Is this something that's reversible?

- Can we at least do a video chat?

- For your podcast? - Yes, Eli, for my podcast .

But listen, if what you say is true,

we have an opportunity to document your story.

We can prove zombies exist.

We can bring awareness to the world.

You'll be the fucking Neil Armstrong of zombies.

Your face will be in textbooks about this shit .

- Maybe it's better if the world doesn't know.

- Then how will it be ready?

How will your daughter be ready?

(Eli sighs)

(sirens wailing)

- Can you see me ? - Turn your phone sideways.

- Better ? - Yeah.

Can I see your bite?

- Oh shit. Sorry. - Jesus Christ.

- Sorry. Sorry. - Should I drive?

- No, no, no, you need to film.

- Okay. - How about your eyes?

- Fuck. - Would you just film?

- Sorry. - I'm sorry. That was rude.

There's a lot going on here right now.

- It's fine. - There's no excuse for that.

Sorry. - It's okay.

- Thanks.

- Does it hurt ? Transforming?

- Well, you have to die first

and then when you wake up you're transformed .

- I guess that doesn't sound so bad.

- Well, technically you're already dead or dying .

- How long does it usually take?

- It depends. It's different for different people .

- Have you ever seen one? - No, actually I haven't.

- So, it must be pretty exciting for you .

- It's amazing .

- It's okay, you can smile .

- So, I guess we have to talk about

what happens after you change .

- What do you mean ?

- Well, remember what I said about

the effects one zombie could have?

- Yeah.

- Well, we don't want you infecting others ,

so I'm gonna need you to contain yourself.

Still have that plywood?

- Yeah, in my garage .

- Okay, well, I'm about 40 minutes out and you're gonna...

You're probably gonna change before I get there ,

so you need to use whatever strength you have left

to board yourself in.

- Reagan.

- I know, buddy.

- Fuck it.

Okay, let's do this .

- Okay, good.

All right, I need you to make sure you get all the exits

and all the windows .

Use screws and a power drill if you can .

It is vitally important that you cannot get out.

I'll be there as soon as I can.

- And then you'll...

- And then I'll show up and-

- Kill me. - Unless you kill me first.

(Casper chuckles)

(Eli chuckles)

(Eli sighs)

- Listen, I need you to do something for me .

- What?

- I'm gonna leave behind the duffel bag.

Inside there will be money, a lot of money.

I don't want the police to find it or anyone else ,

do you understand me ?

- What about McKayla, does she know about it?

- I'll leave it on the kitchen island,

just promise me you'll give it to Reagan

when the time comes.

- Hey, Eli, what about McKayla?

- Just promise me or I'll shoot myself

in the fucking head right now .

- Okay, I promise. Jesus.

(ominous music)

- Is that your date?

- Yeah.

- Hi. - Wow, she's ho t.

- Thanks.

Sorry that you're gonna turn into a zombie.

- Yeah, thanks .

Good luck.

- Hey, Eli? - Yeah ?

- I'm sorry, man.

- Yeah, me too .

(Casper sighs) - Wow.

(ominous music continues)

Should I keep recording?

- No, you can turn that off too.

Thanks. - Yeah.

(car engine humming)

(paper rustling)

(paper continues rustling)

- Oh, Paul, look, it's a duffle bag for summer camp

to replace the one you lost,

courtesy of Uncle Bill, who's sorry he missed your birthday.

Listen, not every present

is going to be a video game or a toy.

When your uncle asks what you wanted for your birthday,

I said you needed a new tote bag,

so if you wanna blame anybody, blame me.

And we're gonna make sure that you do not lose this one.

(gentle music)

(gentle music continues)

(bag rustling)

(gentle music continues)

(Margot chuckles)

(phone ringing)

Hello?

- Hi. I found this number in a bag at Cole's Tavern.

I'm looking for a Paul Daniels.

- Jesus. That's my son's bag.

Let me give you his number.

- Oh, okay.

- He's probably looking everywhere for it.

Are there drugs in it?

- I don't know, I haven't looked inside.

- Do you have a pen?

(phone ringing)

- Hello? - Hi, is this Paul?

- Yeah, who's this? - My name's Margot,

I work at Cole's Tavern.

I found a bag with your name inside.

- You found my bag? - I think so.

- I have torn apart my house, my car, my...

Sorry, you said Cole's Tavern?

- Yeah. - When do you guys close?

- About 30 minutes. - All right,

I'm gonna be there in 20.

- Okay.

(gentle music)

- Is that the duffle bag date?

- Yeah, I think so.

- He's cute. - Shut up.

- You should definitely let him win and influence you.

- Stop it.

[music playing]

[music continues playing]

- You must be Paul. - You must be Margot.

- And this must be your bag.

- You must, must be an angel.

Did you just start working here?

I haven't seen you around.

- Yeah, second day. - Well, here.

- No, I can't. - Sure you can.

- Really, I appreciate it.

- Then take it. Come on, as a tip.

- I'd have to split it with Willow.

- Okay, well, lemme take you out.

(Margot chuckles)

Oh, what? Do you have a boyfriend?

- No, I don't know.

- You don't know if you have a boyfriend?

- I don't know you. - I don't know you either.

- Why do you wanna take me out then?

- You found my lucky bag.

I mean, I think this has gotta mean something.

- It means you must not care that much about your lucky bag

if you left on a dirty bar floor.

- Well, thank you for finding it, Margot.

I hope to see you again.

- You should really update the information in that

if you're gonna leave it places.

- Yeah, I'll do that.

- I'm off Tuesday.

(gentle music)

(drill whirring)

(ominous music)

(drill continues whirring)

(ominous music continues)

(wood thudding)

(drill whirring)

(ominous music continues)

(ominous music continues)

(ominous music continues)

(wood creaking)

(Margot gasps)

(Margot grunts)

(drill whirring)

(Margot yells)

(drill whirring)

(panting)

(drill whirring)

(door thuds)

You've gotta be kidding me.

(drill whirring)

(Eli panting)

(ominous music continues)

(Eli grunting)

(Eli grunts)

(ominous music continues)

(ominous music continues)

(ominous music continues)

(door squeaking)

- You just scared the shit outta me.

- What did you do? - Hey, she fell.

She fell, all right?

It was an accident, all right?

Where's Eli? - I don't know,

but this whole place is boarded up

and we have to get outta here.

- What do you think I'm trying to do?

- [Eli] You have nowhere to go Pilot.

I've blocked all the exits.

Coming after the money I can forgive, but killing my wife,

the mother of my child (laughs).

I'm gonna make you suffer.

(footsteps padding)

(Eli breathing heavily)

(Eli moaning)

(Margot whimpering)

(Margot screaming)

(suspenseful music)

(crowbar thuds)

(gunshot booms)

- I'm sorry. Eli, I'm sorry, man.

Eli, I'm sorry, man.

You pointed a gun at me, dude.

(Eli laughs)

(suspenseful music)

- I'll see you soon, Pilot.

(suspenseful music continues)

- Margot, I...

He was trying to kill me. He was trying to kill you.

I didn't...

It's like the infection was in his brain or something.

- I'm an accomplice.

I won't get as much time as you,

but my life is fucking over. - Hey.

No, no, no, no, no, no. No one's getting any time, okay?

- Don't you watch "Forensic Files,"

the police are fucking smart, okay?

They figure shit out.

How did he even know you were here?

- The bag.

- What bag?

- The bag. The duffle bag.

The bag. My bag.

- You brought that here?

You brought the bag with your fucking name on it here?

Are you a fucking idiot?

- It's my lucky bag. - Stop saying that. Stop.

You're not 10 years old.

How can you be so fucking stupid?

How can I be so fucking stupid?

They have a daughter, Pilot!

(Margot grunts)

- Hey. - Help me get outta here.

- Help me find the bag. - Look around.

And I don't know where it is.

- We're not leaving without it.

- Are you serious?

- My name is in the bag, all right?

We can't just leave it here.

There's two of us, if we split up,

we're gonna find it faster.

There's no point in you doing that, all right?

They're lag screws.

- What does that mean?

- It means they're very sturdy.

Look, he drilled into the studs.

- How do you know that?

- Look, they're in the fricking window frame.

He went through a lot of trouble

to make sure that we weren't gonna get outta here.

Hey, what do you think he meant when he was like,

"I'll see you soon, Pilot?"

- Are you really not gonna help me?

- I need you, Margot. - Fuck you!

Fuck you! Fuck you!

Fuck you!

(suspenseful music continues)

- All right, look.

- No, get the fuck away from me!

- Fine.

I'm gonna go check the kitchen.

You check the living room.

- Where?

(cupboard thuds)

- Shit.

- Fuck.

(footsteps thudding)

(ominous music)

(ominous music continues)

(Eli growling)

(ominous music continues)

(growling)

(ominous music continues)

- What the fuck was that?

- He was dead, all right?

He was dead. I checked his pulse.

- Did you see his face?

Shit. Be quiet.

Hurry up.

- I can't be quiet and hurry up at the same time, all right?

(wood crunching)

- Do you have to be so loud?

- I don't know what you want me to do right now.

- Oh God, you're making so much noise.

(door knocking)

- Hey, hey, Eli, I am really, really sorry about it.

It was all an accident, man.

Can we talk about this?

- That's not Eli.

(door continues knocking)

(both panting)

(crowbar clanking)

(gunshots booming)

(growling)

- Eli, stop, stop, stop.

No, no, no, man.

(Eli continues growling)

(Margot whimpers)

(glass shatters)

(Margot panting)

(suspenseful music)

(Eli growling)

(suspenseful music continues)

(Margot screams)

(suspenseful music continues)

- For those of you just joining our live feed ,

let me get you caught up .

We are in the middle of a zombie hunt .

And no, this is not a prank .

I have visual confirmation, which I'll be posting later .

And yes, I'm fucking terrified .

Invite your friends and family .

This will most likely be taken offline immediately .

- Casper, do you have a girl in here?

- Not now, mom. I'm live.

- You do have a girl in here.

I smelled your perfume .

- Hi . - Hi. I'm Casper's mom.

- Nice to meet you. - Don't video me.

I'm not wearing any makeup.

- Mom, what part of I'm live don't you understand?

- Well, frankly, I don't understand any of this.

- It means that thousands of people

are watching you right now.

Yeah, seriously, you're gonna be a meme

in like 20 minutes.

- A what ? - A meme.

It's an internet thing. Yeah.

It means, like, you might go viral.

- Let's roll. - Okay.

- Where are you going with all that stuff?

- To save the world. - Go for it, honey.

- Bye. - Bye.

(gravel crunching)

- How do I look?

- You look ready to kick some zombie ass.

Go get 'em, Casper.

- You can record me until I go in,

but you can't come in with me.

- Yes, okay.

- Let's go. - Okay.

(suspenseful music)

(door thuds)

(Margot breathing heavily)

(door continues thudding)

(Margot grunts)

(suspenseful music continues)

- Shit.

(door thuds)

(Eli growling)

(Margot screams)

(Eli growling)

(Margot screams)

(Eli growling) (Margot screaming)

(suspenseful music continues)

(Margot panting)

(Margot screams)

(Margot panting)

(Eli growling)

(somber music)

(somber music continues)

(Margot breathing heavily)

(somber music continues)

(somber music continues)

(crowbar thumps)

(growling)

(Margot screams)

(suspenseful music)

(suspenseful music continues)

(Pilot growling)

(Margot gasps)

(suspenseful music continues)

- Hurry, please!

Hurry, please!

(growling)

He's coming for you!

(Casper grunting)

- Oh fuck. Oh fuck.

(Casper screams)

It's Kevlar, bitch.

(Casper grunts)

(knife thuds)

(Pilot growling)

(Ax thumps)

You bit?

- No. - How many others?

- Two - Eli?

- I got him. He's in there.

- Oh, good.

- He was right there.

I stabbed that bar right through his chest.

- Did you get him in the head? - No, in the heart.

- These are zombies, not vampires,

you have to get them in the head.

(Eli growling)

(Casper screams)

Fuck.

(Casper screams)

(flesh squelching)

(Casper continues screaming)

(Casper continues screaming)

(crowbar thuds)

(flesh squelching)

(Margot panting)

- Thank you for saving me.

(crowbar thuds)

(somber music)

Hi. - Hi.

(somber music continues)

(somber music continues)

- Yeah, he broke his hand.

(girls chattering)

- Reagan.

- Do I know you?

- No.

Could you give us a second?

- I'm good.

So...

- So, here we are.

- What does that mean?

- It means I've been waiting for this day.

- Should I be worried?

- I knew your dad.

I don't know how much you know about him.

- Were you a friend of his or something?

- Let's go with or something.

- Okay, I don't know what I'm supposed to do

with that information.

- Your father left you some money.

He wanted you to have it once you became old enough.

- How much?

- This much.

- Wait. Is that drug money?

I know he was a drug dealer.

- No, it's from investments he had at the time of his death.

Here, open your backpack.

I wanna give you something else.

Something that might be even more important than that money.

Something that nobody else alive knows.

I was with him when he died.

- Oh.

- I don't know if you know what happened.

- Just a little bit.

I...

- Your dad died doing the right thing.

If he hadn't boarded up that house...

Your dad died a hero,

and that's how you should remember him.

(upbeat music)

- Reagan, come on.

- I gotta go.

- Yeah.

- Thank you.

- You're welcome.

(upbeat music continues)

(upbeat music continues)

- Hello, freaky fans.

Welcome back to Zombie Playhouse.

I'm your new host, Georgia,

taking over for our fearless,

amazing zombie hunter Casper Credence

who died saving all of humanity.

Rest in peace, Casper.

I understand that these are big shoes to fill

and I'm not trying to replace him as much as honor him.

So, please give me some time.

Now, I have taken some time in the past few weeks

to read all of your comments.

I certainly understand the skepticism

of what really happened that night.

I mean, if I wasn't there myself, I would be skeptical too.

But I was there and witnessed that account firsthand.

Now, ever since we released that video,

there has been an investigation near the CDC building

at Hideaway Park

and they have found multiple experiments.

Now, I'm not confirming anything but,

I promise to do the best I can to update you.

(door thumps) (Georgia gasps)

I've gotta go.

(music playing)

(ominous music)

(ominous music continues)

(ominous music continues)

(music ends)