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1
00:00:57,357 --> 00:00:58,723
Oh, Herr Brockman, I...
2
00:00:58,758 --> 00:01:01,126
Oh, please, Fraulein,
not Herr Brockman.
3
00:01:01,161 --> 00:01:02,127
Call me Horst.
4
00:01:02,162 --> 00:01:04,863
Really, Horst, I think
I've had enough wine.
5
00:01:04,898 --> 00:01:06,943
My face is getting
red as a beet.
6
00:01:06,967 --> 00:01:10,501
Such a becoming color
for such a lovely face.
7
00:01:10,537 --> 00:01:13,338
You artists really
have a way with words.
8
00:01:13,373 --> 00:01:14,439
Mm-hmm.
9
00:01:14,474 --> 00:01:16,041
It must be very exciting
10
00:01:16,076 --> 00:01:18,054
being a foreign correspondent.
11
00:01:18,078 --> 00:01:19,394
Very dangerous, too.
12
00:01:19,429 --> 00:01:22,397
Not nearly as dangerous
as your brother's job.
13
00:01:22,433 --> 00:01:24,666
Takes a real man
to be an SS officer.
14
00:01:24,701 --> 00:01:27,752
His division's right in the
middle of the fighting, isn't it?
15
00:01:27,788 --> 00:01:28,870
It was.
16
00:01:28,906 --> 00:01:31,306
They've been pulled back
from the Russian front to...
17
00:01:34,144 --> 00:01:36,711
The rest is a military
secret, I'm afraid.
18
00:01:36,746 --> 00:01:38,780
Better we not
talk about it, then.
19
00:01:38,815 --> 00:01:41,849
You never know who
might be listening.
20
00:01:41,885 --> 00:01:43,051
I propose a toast.
21
00:01:43,086 --> 00:01:44,719
To what are we toasting?
22
00:01:44,754 --> 00:01:48,523
To your brother's division,
the glorious 12th SS.
23
00:01:48,558 --> 00:01:50,241
Sixth SS.
24
00:01:50,276 --> 00:01:53,778
To the glorious Sixth SS.
25
00:01:53,813 --> 00:01:55,947
May their victories
at the Russian front
26
00:01:55,983 --> 00:01:58,266
be equal to their
new victories in Sicily.
27
00:01:58,301 --> 00:02:00,302
North Africa.
28
00:02:00,337 --> 00:02:02,181
They're regrouping at Stuttgart,
29
00:02:02,205 --> 00:02:05,407
then they're off for a surprise
counterattack at Tobruk.
30
00:02:05,442 --> 00:02:06,858
It will be quite a surprise.
31
00:02:06,893 --> 00:02:08,944
The Allies would never
expect such a move.
32
00:02:08,979 --> 00:02:10,645
To a glorious victory.
33
00:02:10,680 --> 00:02:11,713
Oh, gracious.
34
00:02:11,748 --> 00:02:13,982
With such enchanting
company, I completely forgot.
35
00:02:14,017 --> 00:02:15,934
I have to catch a
plane in a half an hour.
36
00:02:15,969 --> 00:02:18,970
But Horst, couldn't
you take a later plane?
37
00:02:19,005 --> 00:02:20,138
If only I could,
38
00:02:20,174 --> 00:02:23,675
but I have an assignment
of the greatest urgency.
39
00:02:23,710 --> 00:02:25,455
One more glass of
wine before you go?
40
00:02:25,479 --> 00:02:27,628
Best I keep my head clear.
41
00:02:27,664 --> 00:02:31,617
You know, I never did
get your name or address.
42
00:02:31,652 --> 00:02:33,252
Audrey St. Laurence.
43
00:02:33,287 --> 00:02:37,138
Special Operations
Intelligence, London, England.
44
00:02:37,173 --> 00:02:40,442
Are you sure you wormed
enough information
45
00:02:40,477 --> 00:02:42,877
out of me, Colonel Hogan?
46
00:02:57,094 --> 00:02:58,327
Something must have happened.
47
00:02:58,362 --> 00:03:00,273
Colonel Hogan's never
been this late before.
48
00:03:00,297 --> 00:03:01,864
Yeah, it's almost
time for roll call.
49
00:03:01,899 --> 00:03:03,109
He's here.
50
00:03:03,133 --> 00:03:05,178
I could see him making his
way to the edge of the woods.
51
00:03:05,202 --> 00:03:06,246
Schultz coming.
52
00:03:06,270 --> 00:03:08,298
We got to stall him till
Colonel Hogan gets here.
53
00:03:08,322 --> 00:03:09,922
Carter!
54
00:03:14,895 --> 00:03:17,029
Achtung!
55
00:03:17,064 --> 00:03:18,630
Achtung!
56
00:03:18,665 --> 00:03:20,899
What did you say, Schultz?
57
00:03:20,935 --> 00:03:23,135
I said "Achtung!"
58
00:03:23,170 --> 00:03:24,136
Oh.
59
00:03:24,171 --> 00:03:25,220
Your bid, Kinch.
60
00:03:25,256 --> 00:03:27,138
Two of clubs.
61
00:03:27,174 --> 00:03:28,807
When I say "Achtung,"
62
00:03:28,842 --> 00:03:32,510
that means that you all
are to snap to attention.
63
00:03:32,545 --> 00:03:34,457
Oh, is that what it means?
64
00:03:34,481 --> 00:03:35,781
Huh.
65
00:03:35,816 --> 00:03:38,361
I always thought it meant "Good
morning" or "Greetings, mates,"
66
00:03:38,385 --> 00:03:39,350
something like that.
67
00:03:39,386 --> 00:03:40,952
No.
68
00:03:40,988 --> 00:03:43,421
No, "Achtung" is a command.
69
00:03:43,457 --> 00:03:45,140
When I say "Achtung,"
70
00:03:45,175 --> 00:03:48,577
I want you all to come
to attention at once.
71
00:03:48,612 --> 00:03:50,523
I never was sure
what it meant myself.
72
00:03:50,547 --> 00:03:53,593
It always sounded like Schultz
was just clearing his throat.
73
00:03:53,617 --> 00:03:55,761
You say it's a command
for attention, huh?
74
00:03:55,785 --> 00:03:56,785
That's right.
75
00:03:56,820 --> 00:03:58,720
Now that you all know it...
76
00:04:03,193 --> 00:04:04,308
Achtung!
77
00:04:04,344 --> 00:04:06,728
And a good morning
to you, too, Schultz.
78
00:04:08,281 --> 00:04:10,493
Didn't you hear
what Schultz said?
79
00:04:10,517 --> 00:04:11,483
Sure.
80
00:04:11,518 --> 00:04:12,484
He said "Achtung,"
81
00:04:12,519 --> 00:04:14,453
so I said "Good
morning" right back to him.
82
00:04:14,488 --> 00:04:16,466
"Achtung" doesn't
mean "Good morning."
83
00:04:16,490 --> 00:04:18,490
Well, that's what
Newkirk says it means.
84
00:04:18,525 --> 00:04:21,526
And who are we going to
believe, one of us or one of them?
85
00:04:23,063 --> 00:04:24,273
He's got a point there.
86
00:04:24,297 --> 00:04:25,408
Yes, he does.
87
00:04:25,432 --> 00:04:27,744
You better brush up on
your German, Schultz.
88
00:04:27,768 --> 00:04:29,968
Yeah, don't use words
you're not sure of.
89
00:04:30,003 --> 00:04:31,470
In future, to avoid confusion,
90
00:04:31,505 --> 00:04:33,938
why don't you just say
"Good morning" in English.
91
00:04:33,974 --> 00:04:35,090
It wasn't...
92
00:04:35,125 --> 00:04:36,174
Hi, Schultz.
93
00:04:36,210 --> 00:04:38,610
Let us know when it's
time for roll call, will you?
94
00:04:38,645 --> 00:04:39,656
Jawohl, Colonel.
95
00:04:39,680 --> 00:04:40,990
But it is time for roll call!
96
00:04:41,014 --> 00:04:42,858
That's why I'm here
in the first place.
97
00:04:42,882 --> 00:04:44,561
It's almost past
time for roll call.
98
00:04:44,585 --> 00:04:47,185
Boy, you'd never make
sergeant in our air force.
99
00:04:47,221 --> 00:04:48,264
Roll call!
100
00:04:48,288 --> 00:04:50,500
Everybody out,
out, out, out, out.
101
00:04:50,524 --> 00:04:51,489
Roll call!
102
00:04:51,525 --> 00:04:52,924
Raus.
103
00:04:52,959 --> 00:04:55,360
Thank you, and a "Good
day" to you, too, Schultz.
104
00:04:57,797 --> 00:04:59,364
And while I'm on leave,
105
00:04:59,399 --> 00:05:02,617
Colonel Krueger will be
in charge of Stalag 13.
106
00:05:02,652 --> 00:05:06,120
Now let me leave
you with this warning:
107
00:05:06,156 --> 00:05:10,391
while the cat's away,
the mice better not play.
108
00:05:11,762 --> 00:05:15,479
And I will personally deal with
any mouse play around here.
109
00:05:15,515 --> 00:05:17,549
You can depend on my
men to conduct themselves
110
00:05:17,584 --> 00:05:18,700
as they always have, sir.
111
00:05:18,735 --> 00:05:21,402
Colonel Hogan, I will
hold you responsible.
112
00:05:21,438 --> 00:05:23,555
Sergeant Schultz,
dismiss the men.
113
00:05:23,590 --> 00:05:25,790
Jawohl, Herr Kommandant.
114
00:05:26,843 --> 00:05:28,276
Achtung.
115
00:05:28,311 --> 00:05:29,372
Now, uh, uh, uh...
116
00:05:29,396 --> 00:05:30,946
I mean, good morning.
117
00:05:30,981 --> 00:05:31,947
I mean... attention.
118
00:05:31,982 --> 00:05:33,359
Colonel Krueger looks
119
00:05:33,383 --> 00:05:34,683
like a lot of
laughs, doesn't he?
120
00:05:34,718 --> 00:05:36,712
Oh, yeah, he's a
regular Huckleberry Finn.
121
00:05:36,736 --> 00:05:38,920
Colonel Hogan, will you
do me a small favor, please?
122
00:05:38,955 --> 00:05:40,099
Sure, Schultz; what is it?
123
00:05:40,123 --> 00:05:42,223
Will you tell your
men not to leave
124
00:05:42,258 --> 00:05:44,426
until I say,
"Prisoners dismissed."
125
00:05:44,461 --> 00:05:46,494
I mean, please, not everybody,
126
00:05:46,530 --> 00:05:48,779
but enough to make me look good.
127
00:05:48,815 --> 00:05:51,266
Well, I don't mind hanging
around when the weather's nice,
128
00:05:51,301 --> 00:05:53,768
but a man could take a nasty
chill on a morning like this.
129
00:05:53,803 --> 00:05:56,082
I think it was pretty
decent of us to stick around
130
00:05:56,106 --> 00:05:57,816
for Colonel Klink's
farewell address.
131
00:05:57,840 --> 00:05:59,291
I believe my men's health
132
00:05:59,326 --> 00:06:01,692
comes before your
personal glory, Schultz.
133
00:06:01,728 --> 00:06:04,930
But Colonel Hogan, I do not
want to make a bad impression
134
00:06:04,965 --> 00:06:06,214
on the new Kommandant.
135
00:06:06,249 --> 00:06:07,332
From the looks of him,
136
00:06:07,367 --> 00:06:09,767
that's the only kind anybody's
going to make on him.
137
00:06:09,803 --> 00:06:12,186
That's not very
nice of you, LeBeau.
138
00:06:12,222 --> 00:06:13,187
Hey.
139
00:06:13,223 --> 00:06:15,289
The colonel and the
Gestapo act like old buddies.
140
00:06:15,325 --> 00:06:16,290
What's up, Schultz?
141
00:06:16,326 --> 00:06:17,291
Are you asking me?
142
00:06:17,327 --> 00:06:20,829
Haven't you learned
that I know nothing,
143
00:06:20,864 --> 00:06:23,965
I see nothing and
I hear nothing?
144
00:06:24,000 --> 00:06:24,983
Morning, gentlemen.
145
00:06:25,018 --> 00:06:25,984
Allow me to, uh...
146
00:06:26,019 --> 00:06:27,630
Hogan, this is a
private conversation.
147
00:06:27,654 --> 00:06:28,620
Oh, I'm sorry, sir.
148
00:06:28,655 --> 00:06:29,821
I didn't mean to interrupt.
149
00:06:29,856 --> 00:06:31,123
Just wanted to pay my respects
150
00:06:31,158 --> 00:06:32,224
to Colonel Krueger here.
151
00:06:32,259 --> 00:06:33,442
Military courtesy, you know.
152
00:06:33,494 --> 00:06:34,993
Very good of you, Colonel.
153
00:06:35,028 --> 00:06:36,945
You'll find that I'm
more than willing to...
154
00:06:36,980 --> 00:06:38,624
Hogan, this is a
private conversation.
155
00:06:38,648 --> 00:06:40,282
No one can hear
what I'm saying, sir.
156
00:06:40,317 --> 00:06:41,627
This is a private conversation
157
00:06:41,651 --> 00:06:43,596
between Colonel Krueger,
Colonel Nikolas and myself.
158
00:06:43,620 --> 00:06:45,231
Oh, of course, that's
what you said before.
159
00:06:45,255 --> 00:06:47,099
I'm sorry, gentlemen, I
didn't mean to interrupt.
160
00:06:47,123 --> 00:06:48,133
That's what you said before
161
00:06:48,157 --> 00:06:49,835
and all you've done
is interrupt ever since.
162
00:06:49,859 --> 00:06:51,988
Before I leave, I
have a few things
163
00:06:52,012 --> 00:06:55,091
to discuss with Colonel
Krueger... personal matters.
164
00:06:55,115 --> 00:06:56,659
You're welcome to
use the officer's mess
165
00:06:56,683 --> 00:06:57,649
if you'd like, sir.
166
00:06:57,684 --> 00:06:59,450
Excuse me, gentlemen,
I think you'll find it
167
00:06:59,486 --> 00:07:00,985
much more convenient
and more privacy
168
00:07:01,020 --> 00:07:02,120
in Colonel Klink's office.
169
00:07:02,155 --> 00:07:04,667
We don't want to
inconvenience the Kommandant.
170
00:07:04,691 --> 00:07:06,719
Well, you see, I have
a lot of work to do and...
171
00:07:06,743 --> 00:07:08,009
It's no inconvenience at all.
172
00:07:08,044 --> 00:07:09,811
Anything for the
Gestapo, right, Colonel?
173
00:07:09,846 --> 00:07:12,125
Of course I can
always do my work later.
174
00:07:12,149 --> 00:07:14,416
That's most kind
of you, Colonel.
175
00:07:14,451 --> 00:07:15,500
That's nothing.
176
00:07:15,536 --> 00:07:16,500
Glad to do it.
177
00:07:16,536 --> 00:07:18,769
I was addressing the Kommandant.
178
00:07:18,805 --> 00:07:19,805
Hogan!
179
00:07:21,140 --> 00:07:22,374
Try to be nice.
180
00:07:24,845 --> 00:07:26,310
That will be all, Fraulein.
181
00:07:26,346 --> 00:07:27,812
Jawohl, Herr Kommandant.
182
00:07:29,483 --> 00:07:30,548
And one more thing...
183
00:07:30,584 --> 00:07:33,084
Would you make sure
that we are not disturbed?
184
00:07:33,119 --> 00:07:34,452
Jawohl.
185
00:07:37,441 --> 00:07:39,908
You know, Walter, in one week,
186
00:07:39,943 --> 00:07:43,661
Stalag 13 will not look
like the same place.
187
00:07:43,696 --> 00:07:46,614
Except for the Fraulein, I hope.
188
00:07:46,650 --> 00:07:50,418
Now if we can only
convince the High Command
189
00:07:50,453 --> 00:07:52,131
to let the military
fight the war,
190
00:07:52,155 --> 00:07:53,571
let us run the prison camps.
191
00:07:53,607 --> 00:07:56,541
When they see the changes
here, they will be convinced.
192
00:07:56,577 --> 00:07:58,793
So that's what they're up to.
193
00:07:58,828 --> 00:08:00,311
A Gestapo takeover.
194
00:08:00,347 --> 00:08:01,312
Kinch.
195
00:08:01,347 --> 00:08:02,313
Yeah.
196
00:08:02,348 --> 00:08:04,348
Did you radio London
about that surprise attack
197
00:08:04,384 --> 00:08:05,395
the Sixth SS is planning?
198
00:08:05,419 --> 00:08:07,184
Not yet, Colonel...
Too much interference.
199
00:08:07,220 --> 00:08:08,453
The Germans must be jamming.
200
00:08:08,488 --> 00:08:11,401
I like the idea of cutting
food rations in half,
201
00:08:11,425 --> 00:08:14,609
and confiscating their
Red Cross packages
202
00:08:14,644 --> 00:08:17,545
as spoils of war
is really brilliant.
203
00:08:17,580 --> 00:08:19,681
We must think of our
own people, Walter.
204
00:08:19,716 --> 00:08:22,150
They would pay us
anything on the black market
205
00:08:22,186 --> 00:08:23,218
for those packages.
206
00:08:23,253 --> 00:08:24,253
Ah.
207
00:08:24,287 --> 00:08:25,720
I guess we heard enough.
208
00:08:25,755 --> 00:08:27,166
I wish I hadn't heard any of it.
209
00:08:27,190 --> 00:08:29,924
Those two are going to make
a jail out of this prison camp.
210
00:08:29,959 --> 00:08:31,820
Keep trying to get
through to London, Kinch.
211
00:08:31,844 --> 00:08:32,810
With the Gestapo here,
212
00:08:32,845 --> 00:08:34,023
we may have to go off the air
213
00:08:34,047 --> 00:08:35,012
on very short notice.
214
00:08:35,048 --> 00:08:36,048
Right, Colonel.
215
00:08:37,050 --> 00:08:38,649
We've got to keep Klink here.
216
00:08:38,685 --> 00:08:40,285
We can kill this whole thing
217
00:08:40,320 --> 00:08:42,454
if we can get him
to cancel his leave.
218
00:08:42,489 --> 00:08:44,355
Cancel a two-week leave?
219
00:08:44,391 --> 00:08:46,569
No one in his right mind...
220
00:08:46,593 --> 00:08:48,953
You may have a chance at that.
221
00:08:55,652 --> 00:08:58,787
Herr Kommandant, you're
packed and ready to go.
222
00:08:58,822 --> 00:08:59,966
Thank you, Schultz.
223
00:08:59,990 --> 00:09:03,235
Ah, the mountain air will
be beautiful this time of year.
224
00:09:03,259 --> 00:09:04,954
I cannot wait to
get up to the lodge.
225
00:09:04,978 --> 00:09:06,027
Let me see...
226
00:09:06,063 --> 00:09:08,529
The train trip will
take about nine hours.
227
00:09:08,565 --> 00:09:10,815
Would it be not
much quicker to fly?
228
00:09:10,851 --> 00:09:12,984
It takes only an
hour by airplane.
229
00:09:13,019 --> 00:09:13,985
No, Schultz.
230
00:09:14,020 --> 00:09:15,565
Then you miss the
beautiful scenery.
231
00:09:15,589 --> 00:09:17,071
Besides, I enjoy trains.
232
00:09:17,107 --> 00:09:18,807
You would enjoy airplanes, too,
233
00:09:18,842 --> 00:09:20,636
if you wouldn't
be afraid to fly.
234
00:09:20,660 --> 00:09:22,777
Schultz, I'm not
afraid of flying.
235
00:09:22,812 --> 00:09:26,147
It's just that I find train
traveling more relaxing.
236
00:09:26,182 --> 00:09:29,584
Now, did you pack
everything that I laid out?
237
00:09:29,620 --> 00:09:30,952
Jawohl, Herr Kommandant.
238
00:09:30,987 --> 00:09:32,653
Oh.
239
00:09:32,689 --> 00:09:34,923
I think I forgot something.
240
00:09:34,958 --> 00:09:35,958
What was it...
241
00:09:35,992 --> 00:09:39,077
The nose drops, ear
drops or the eye drops?
242
00:09:39,112 --> 00:09:41,946
Why don't you open
the bag and make sure?
243
00:09:41,982 --> 00:09:43,214
Jawohl, Herr Kommandant.
244
00:09:43,249 --> 00:09:45,662
Sorry to bust in on you like
this, sir, but I just had to...
245
00:09:45,686 --> 00:09:47,030
Thank goodness you're unpacking.
246
00:09:47,054 --> 00:09:48,865
This is certainly no
time to go on vacation.
247
00:09:48,889 --> 00:09:50,332
Hogan, what are
you talking about?
248
00:09:50,356 --> 00:09:51,734
You know what
I'm talking about...
249
00:09:51,758 --> 00:09:53,619
Colonel Krueger and
his Gestapo hatchet man.
250
00:09:53,643 --> 00:09:56,410
I was pretty sure you
saw the same thing I saw.
251
00:09:56,446 --> 00:09:57,595
What is it you saw?
252
00:09:57,630 --> 00:09:58,997
The same thing you saw.
253
00:09:59,032 --> 00:10:00,609
You did see it, didn't you?
254
00:10:00,633 --> 00:10:02,000
If you saw it, I saw it.
255
00:10:02,035 --> 00:10:03,568
What was it we were seeing?
256
00:10:03,603 --> 00:10:05,481
The nods and winks
between Krueger and Nikolas.
257
00:10:05,505 --> 00:10:06,716
Those two are up to something.
258
00:10:06,740 --> 00:10:07,706
We both saw that.
259
00:10:07,741 --> 00:10:08,606
Hogan, I...
260
00:10:08,641 --> 00:10:09,919
Now that you're
going to be staying on,
261
00:10:09,943 --> 00:10:11,521
they'll have to call
off their little scheme.
262
00:10:11,545 --> 00:10:12,510
What scheme?
263
00:10:12,546 --> 00:10:14,390
Colonel Krueger's
after your command.
264
00:10:14,414 --> 00:10:15,458
Well, you knew that.
265
00:10:15,482 --> 00:10:17,398
Hogan, that's ridiculous.
266
00:10:17,433 --> 00:10:19,428
Oh? Then why'd you
cancel your leave?
267
00:10:19,452 --> 00:10:20,718
Because I...
268
00:10:20,754 --> 00:10:22,219
Who said I canceled my leave?
269
00:10:22,255 --> 00:10:23,999
That's the only
way to stop them.
270
00:10:24,023 --> 00:10:26,185
What makes my blood
boil is that they had the gall
271
00:10:26,209 --> 00:10:27,886
to plot against you
in your own office.
272
00:10:27,910 --> 00:10:30,088
Schultz, get that luggage
unpacked on the double.
273
00:10:30,112 --> 00:10:31,763
Jawohl, Colonel.
274
00:10:31,798 --> 00:10:33,014
Achtung, Schultz.
275
00:10:33,049 --> 00:10:35,533
Oh, no, no, Herr
Kommandant, not "Achtung."
276
00:10:35,569 --> 00:10:37,001
"Achtung" is too late.
277
00:10:37,036 --> 00:10:40,438
What you want to say is "Good
afternoon, Sergeant Schultz."
278
00:10:40,473 --> 00:10:42,273
It's almost 3:30.
279
00:10:42,309 --> 00:10:44,609
Suddenly, I'm
surrounded by two lunatics.
280
00:10:44,644 --> 00:10:45,688
Not lunatics, sir.
281
00:10:45,712 --> 00:10:47,890
I'd call Krueger
and Nikolas fanatics.
282
00:10:47,914 --> 00:10:49,931
I was talking about
you and Schultz.
283
00:10:49,966 --> 00:10:50,949
Oh, swell.
284
00:10:50,984 --> 00:10:52,717
That's the gratitude I get?
285
00:10:52,752 --> 00:10:53,718
I try to help.
286
00:10:53,753 --> 00:10:55,119
What thanks do I get?
287
00:10:55,154 --> 00:10:57,021
Oh, I do thank you, Hogan.
288
00:10:57,056 --> 00:10:59,507
I thank you for
trying to ruin a trip
289
00:10:59,543 --> 00:11:01,675
that I've planned all last year.
290
00:11:01,711 --> 00:11:03,812
I thank you for trying
to make me suspicious
291
00:11:03,847 --> 00:11:05,063
of a loyal comrade.
292
00:11:05,098 --> 00:11:08,733
I thank you for trying to turn
one of my own men against me!
293
00:11:10,002 --> 00:11:12,203
Schultz, you fathead!
294
00:11:12,239 --> 00:11:14,606
Pack, don't unpack.
295
00:11:14,641 --> 00:11:16,073
Jawohl, Herr Kommandant.
296
00:11:24,133 --> 00:11:25,744
He wasn't about
to cancel his leave.
297
00:11:25,768 --> 00:11:28,313
He just laughed at the idea
of Krueger taking over here.
298
00:11:28,337 --> 00:11:29,837
Yeah, well, the laugh's on him,
299
00:11:29,873 --> 00:11:31,539
although it's no
laughing matter.
300
00:11:31,574 --> 00:11:32,985
Yeah, the Gestapo have a way
301
00:11:33,009 --> 00:11:35,489
of taking all the
fun out of prison life.
302
00:11:36,730 --> 00:11:39,158
Guess that means we'll be going
out of the espionage business
303
00:11:39,182 --> 00:11:40,275
for awhile, won't we, sir?
304
00:11:40,299 --> 00:11:41,949
I don't know.
305
00:11:41,985 --> 00:11:44,129
Krueger could just be
a very good fighter pilot
306
00:11:44,153 --> 00:11:45,965
with no brains at
all for this command.
307
00:11:45,989 --> 00:11:48,857
Yeah, that still makes
him smarter than Klink.
308
00:11:48,892 --> 00:11:51,036
And the Gestapo
is supporting him.
309
00:11:51,060 --> 00:11:53,461
If we could discredit Krueger...
310
00:11:53,497 --> 00:11:56,097
takes care of the
plan right there.
311
00:11:57,401 --> 00:11:58,681
All clear, Kinch.
312
00:12:00,036 --> 00:12:02,248
Colonel, I finally got
through to London.
313
00:12:02,272 --> 00:12:03,916
They send their warmest thanks
314
00:12:03,940 --> 00:12:05,573
and these instructions.
315
00:12:05,608 --> 00:12:06,574
Instructions?
316
00:12:06,609 --> 00:12:08,242
I told them about
the enemy attack.
317
00:12:08,278 --> 00:12:09,410
What more do they want?
318
00:12:11,814 --> 00:12:13,814
Huh?
319
00:12:13,849 --> 00:12:17,218
Are they out of their
ever-loving minds?
320
00:12:17,253 --> 00:12:18,386
This is crazy.
321
00:12:18,421 --> 00:12:19,454
It's insane.
322
00:12:21,057 --> 00:12:23,224
Absolutely insane.
323
00:12:24,744 --> 00:12:26,311
There's no way.
324
00:12:28,215 --> 00:12:30,414
Some nut had to
come up with this one.
325
00:12:30,449 --> 00:12:31,983
Good news, sir?
326
00:12:33,769 --> 00:12:37,037
The Allied forces need a little
time to bring up fresh troops
327
00:12:37,073 --> 00:12:39,051
to launch a surprise
counteroffensive
328
00:12:39,075 --> 00:12:41,325
against the German
surprise counterattack.
329
00:12:41,361 --> 00:12:42,894
What's that got to do with us?
330
00:12:42,929 --> 00:12:45,830
They want us to keep those
SS troops pinned down here
331
00:12:45,865 --> 00:12:47,365
for at least two more days.
332
00:12:47,400 --> 00:12:50,468
We're supposed to keep
10,000 men pinned down?!
333
00:12:50,504 --> 00:12:52,537
Did they say how we'd do that?
334
00:12:52,572 --> 00:12:54,472
There's only one way...
335
00:12:54,507 --> 00:12:55,923
we surround them.
336
00:12:55,958 --> 00:12:57,658
Now, I don't know...
337
00:12:57,694 --> 00:12:59,939
We got so much going
in our favor as it is.
338
00:12:59,963 --> 00:13:02,240
You see, we're a
small group, first of all,
339
00:13:02,264 --> 00:13:03,943
and we have the added advantage
340
00:13:03,967 --> 00:13:05,365
of being unarmed.
341
00:13:05,401 --> 00:13:06,946
I'd say we try direct charge.
342
00:13:06,970 --> 00:13:08,736
Good plan, Newkirk.
343
00:13:08,772 --> 00:13:10,788
They'd never expect
a surprise attack
344
00:13:10,823 --> 00:13:12,257
from five unarmed men.
345
00:13:12,292 --> 00:13:13,992
So right there we've got
346
00:13:14,027 --> 00:13:16,043
the element of
surprise going for us.
347
00:13:16,078 --> 00:13:17,706
They don't really expect
us to delay that division,
348
00:13:17,730 --> 00:13:18,696
do they, Colonel?
349
00:13:18,732 --> 00:13:20,475
Not unless you got
this message wrong.
350
00:13:20,499 --> 00:13:22,160
I thought it might
be a mistake, too,
351
00:13:22,184 --> 00:13:23,584
so I asked them to repeat it.
352
00:13:23,620 --> 00:13:25,414
Five times I asked
them to repeat it.
353
00:13:25,438 --> 00:13:28,956
I'd say they definitely expect
us to delay that division.
354
00:13:28,991 --> 00:13:30,057
How?
355
00:13:30,093 --> 00:13:31,592
We don't even have any guns.
356
00:13:31,628 --> 00:13:33,393
Carter, if we had guns
357
00:13:33,429 --> 00:13:35,941
there'd be no trick to
it at all, would there?
358
00:13:35,965 --> 00:13:38,176
We'd just sneak up
behind them 10,000 men,
359
00:13:38,200 --> 00:13:40,445
we'd say, "All right,
this is a stick-up.
360
00:13:40,469 --> 00:13:42,414
Don't anybody
move for three days."
361
00:13:42,438 --> 00:13:43,548
If this is an example
362
00:13:43,572 --> 00:13:45,050
of London's warmest thanks,
363
00:13:45,074 --> 00:13:46,184
we better not send them
364
00:13:46,208 --> 00:13:47,536
any more enemy information.
365
00:13:47,560 --> 00:13:49,321
They've given us tough
assignments before
366
00:13:49,345 --> 00:13:52,046
and we've always been able to
think of a way to get them done.
367
00:13:52,081 --> 00:13:53,281
They probably just assume
368
00:13:53,316 --> 00:13:54,826
that we're going to
do it the same way
369
00:13:54,850 --> 00:13:55,894
with this little problem.
370
00:13:55,918 --> 00:13:58,903
Well, five men cannot
hold off a division.
371
00:13:58,938 --> 00:13:59,787
Right.
372
00:13:59,823 --> 00:14:01,022
It's ridiculous.
373
00:14:01,057 --> 00:14:02,022
Right.
374
00:14:02,058 --> 00:14:03,857
Just can't be done.
375
00:14:03,893 --> 00:14:05,259
Right.
376
00:14:07,029 --> 00:14:09,763
And here's how
we're going to do it.
377
00:14:09,799 --> 00:14:11,165
Escape!
378
00:14:11,201 --> 00:14:12,734
What escape?!
379
00:14:12,769 --> 00:14:16,086
I went to Barrack One
for morning roll call...
380
00:14:17,757 --> 00:14:19,256
and the men were gone.
381
00:14:19,292 --> 00:14:20,607
How many men?
382
00:14:20,643 --> 00:14:23,794
All 15 of them.
383
00:14:23,830 --> 00:14:25,763
What's happening, Kinch?
384
00:14:25,798 --> 00:14:28,333
Is Krueger calling out the
Sixth SS to help in the search?
385
00:14:28,368 --> 00:14:29,767
Nikolas is all for it,
386
00:14:29,802 --> 00:14:31,469
but Krueger wants
to handle it himself.
387
00:14:31,504 --> 00:14:32,714
Here you are, boys,
388
00:14:32,738 --> 00:14:34,333
our own private
entrance to the camp.
389
00:14:34,357 --> 00:14:35,634
All right, fellows, let's go.
390
00:14:35,658 --> 00:14:36,957
Hi.
391
00:14:36,993 --> 00:14:38,359
Here we go.
392
00:14:39,529 --> 00:14:41,374
Move all the way
back there, huh?
393
00:14:41,398 --> 00:14:43,238
Plenty of room for everybody.
394
00:14:44,483 --> 00:14:45,628
Can you fill us in
395
00:14:45,652 --> 00:14:46,896
on just what we're doing, sir?
396
00:14:46,920 --> 00:14:48,285
Yeah, we have orders
397
00:14:48,321 --> 00:14:50,249
to keep the Sixth SS
Division from moving out.
398
00:14:50,273 --> 00:14:51,751
We're hoping Colonel
Krueger gets them
399
00:14:51,775 --> 00:14:53,602
to help track down all
the escaped prisoners.
400
00:14:53,626 --> 00:14:55,755
What escaped prisoners are
you talking about, Colonel?
401
00:14:55,779 --> 00:14:58,140
I'm talking about you 15
men from Barracks One.
402
00:14:58,164 --> 00:14:59,497
My cooperation just ended.
403
00:14:59,532 --> 00:15:01,410
I don't like being
a prisoner of war,
404
00:15:01,434 --> 00:15:03,768
but I'm a lot safer
inside than I am outside.
405
00:15:03,803 --> 00:15:06,081
Colonel, they'd nail us
before we got ten feet.
406
00:15:06,105 --> 00:15:08,450
And them SS boys, they're
a trigger-happy bunch.
407
00:15:08,474 --> 00:15:09,735
Let me explain something.
408
00:15:09,759 --> 00:15:11,871
Nobody's stepping
foot outside this camp.
409
00:15:11,895 --> 00:15:13,995
That way you won't
be taking any chances.
410
00:15:14,030 --> 00:15:15,612
We're escaped prisoners,
411
00:15:15,648 --> 00:15:17,481
but we never leave
the prison, right?
412
00:15:17,516 --> 00:15:19,595
That's right, we're going to
hide you here in the tunnel.
413
00:15:19,619 --> 00:15:20,696
All right, let's move out.
414
00:15:20,720 --> 00:15:22,531
Come on, fellows,
make room for him.
415
00:15:22,555 --> 00:15:24,332
One more in there...
Plenty of room.
416
00:15:24,356 --> 00:15:25,490
When he was captured,
417
00:15:25,525 --> 00:15:27,636
did they have to quiet him
down with a crack on the head
418
00:15:27,660 --> 00:15:28,826
or anything like that?
419
00:15:28,862 --> 00:15:31,428
I imagine he put up a
bit of a struggle, yes.
420
00:15:31,464 --> 00:15:33,392
Something bothering
you, Sergeant?
421
00:15:33,416 --> 00:15:34,715
Well, it's this escape idea.
422
00:15:34,750 --> 00:15:36,150
Does it make any sense to you?
423
00:15:36,185 --> 00:15:37,746
Frankly, I think it's one
424
00:15:37,770 --> 00:15:40,170
of the Colonel's
more brilliant plans.
425
00:15:40,206 --> 00:15:42,540
Uh-huh...
426
00:15:42,575 --> 00:15:43,941
You took a couple of good ones
427
00:15:43,976 --> 00:15:45,876
in the old noggin
yourself, didn't you?
428
00:15:48,264 --> 00:15:50,075
I will not have
escaped prisoners
429
00:15:50,099 --> 00:15:52,011
sabotaging the
German war effort.
430
00:15:52,035 --> 00:15:53,946
I will have to call in
the Sixth SS Division.
431
00:15:53,970 --> 00:15:55,469
That will not be
necessary, Colonel.
432
00:15:55,504 --> 00:15:56,916
My men will capture
the prisoners.
433
00:15:56,940 --> 00:15:58,239
Your men are the ones
434
00:15:58,274 --> 00:16:00,007
who let them get
away in the first place.
435
00:16:00,042 --> 00:16:01,236
Surely you don't think
436
00:16:01,260 --> 00:16:02,471
that this escape is my fault?
437
00:16:02,495 --> 00:16:03,561
Bah.
438
00:16:03,596 --> 00:16:05,374
But obviously they
have been planning it
439
00:16:05,398 --> 00:16:06,608
for some time...
440
00:16:06,632 --> 00:16:08,644
Right under the
nose of Colonel Klink.
441
00:16:08,668 --> 00:16:10,634
But they escaped under yours,
442
00:16:10,670 --> 00:16:13,137
so you can't really pin
this on anybody's nose
443
00:16:13,173 --> 00:16:14,173
except your own!
444
00:16:15,408 --> 00:16:16,357
Sergeant!
445
00:16:16,392 --> 00:16:18,208
J-j-jawohl, Herr Kommandant.
446
00:16:18,244 --> 00:16:20,677
Shall I call the
prisoners to attention?
447
00:16:20,713 --> 00:16:21,873
No, Sergeant.
448
00:16:21,897 --> 00:16:23,409
I would like you
to kick in the door
449
00:16:23,433 --> 00:16:25,060
and we'll see what
they may be up to.
450
00:16:25,084 --> 00:16:27,051
Jawohl, Herr Kommandant.
451
00:16:29,688 --> 00:16:31,321
Didn't you hear the Kommandant?!
452
00:16:31,357 --> 00:16:32,756
Kick in the door!
453
00:16:36,495 --> 00:16:39,564
Nobody move or I will...
454
00:16:43,603 --> 00:16:45,402
They're gone, too.
455
00:16:45,438 --> 00:16:46,403
Where are they?
456
00:16:46,439 --> 00:16:47,638
They must have escaped.
457
00:16:47,674 --> 00:16:48,884
They couldn't have.
458
00:16:48,908 --> 00:16:50,274
Why not?
459
00:16:50,309 --> 00:16:51,871
This seems to be the day for it.
460
00:16:51,895 --> 00:16:53,138
If they have escaped,
461
00:16:53,162 --> 00:16:54,874
they cannot be far from here.
462
00:16:54,898 --> 00:16:56,976
So you will organize
a search party
463
00:16:57,000 --> 00:16:58,126
and go after them.
464
00:16:58,150 --> 00:16:59,549
Yes, sir!
465
00:16:59,585 --> 00:17:01,130
But I have already
a search party
466
00:17:01,154 --> 00:17:03,470
out looking for the men
from Barrack Number One.
467
00:17:03,506 --> 00:17:06,273
So organize a
second search party.
468
00:17:06,308 --> 00:17:07,591
Yes, Colonel.
469
00:17:09,228 --> 00:17:10,928
If this keeps up,
470
00:17:10,964 --> 00:17:13,815
we won't have any men
left to guard the prisoners.
471
00:17:13,850 --> 00:17:15,582
If this keeps up, Sergeant,
472
00:17:15,618 --> 00:17:18,402
you won't have any
prisoners left to guard.
473
00:17:18,437 --> 00:17:20,988
Yes, Colonel.
474
00:17:21,023 --> 00:17:24,992
May I use your office
phone, Colonel Krueger?
475
00:17:25,027 --> 00:17:27,628
If you think you
are going to call
476
00:17:27,664 --> 00:17:30,097
the Sixth SS Division to help...
477
00:17:30,132 --> 00:17:32,916
That's exactly
what I think I'll do.
478
00:17:32,952 --> 00:17:34,468
All right now, fellows,
479
00:17:34,503 --> 00:17:37,572
Colonel Hogan wants
you men to feel free to do
480
00:17:37,607 --> 00:17:39,574
anything you feel like doing.
481
00:17:39,609 --> 00:17:41,775
A couple of things you can't do:
482
00:17:41,810 --> 00:17:44,261
Uh, no smoking and
no moving around.
483
00:17:44,296 --> 00:17:48,582
You know, no unnecessary
noises like talk and stuff like that.
484
00:17:48,617 --> 00:17:51,752
Just what can we do?
485
00:17:51,788 --> 00:17:53,399
Well, I would suggest you find
486
00:17:53,423 --> 00:17:56,156
a nice, comfortable spot
and sack out for awhile.
487
00:17:56,192 --> 00:17:57,607
I just left a comfortable spot
488
00:17:57,643 --> 00:17:58,742
where I was sacked out.
489
00:17:58,777 --> 00:18:00,344
How long are we
going to be stuck
490
00:18:00,379 --> 00:18:01,845
in this Black Hole of Calcutta?
491
00:18:01,881 --> 00:18:03,314
Only a very short time...
492
00:18:03,349 --> 00:18:05,015
One or two days at the most.
493
00:18:07,554 --> 00:18:08,730
Well, how are we fixed for chow?
494
00:18:08,754 --> 00:18:11,383
Oh, well, now, you're going
to be eating the very best.
495
00:18:11,407 --> 00:18:13,418
You see, our chef
here, Corporal LeBeau,
496
00:18:13,442 --> 00:18:15,254
has an access to
the officers' mess.
497
00:18:15,278 --> 00:18:16,654
So we have a ready supply...
498
00:18:16,678 --> 00:18:17,878
Not anymore.
499
00:18:17,914 --> 00:18:19,446
They had all the locks changed.
500
00:18:19,482 --> 00:18:21,059
Does that mean there
ain't no chow for us?
501
00:18:21,083 --> 00:18:22,250
You'll be fed, Corporal.
502
00:18:22,285 --> 00:18:23,618
We don't have a lot of food,
503
00:18:23,653 --> 00:18:25,052
but with a little imagination
504
00:18:25,087 --> 00:18:26,554
I can make a very nice dinner.
505
00:18:26,589 --> 00:18:28,472
What about breakfast and lunch?
506
00:18:28,507 --> 00:18:30,524
I imagine that's what
I'll be making it with.
507
00:18:30,559 --> 00:18:33,244
Oh, hey, come on, fellows,
just hold it down now.
508
00:18:33,279 --> 00:18:35,090
You want the
Germans to catch you?
509
00:18:35,114 --> 00:18:36,692
No, I want them to rescue us.
510
00:18:36,716 --> 00:18:38,299
What kind of soldiers are you?
511
00:18:38,334 --> 00:18:39,667
You're not thinking
512
00:18:39,702 --> 00:18:41,335
of the thousands of
lives you can save!
513
00:18:41,370 --> 00:18:43,036
You only care about
eating and sleeping!
514
00:18:43,072 --> 00:18:44,705
Have you forgotten
we're fighting a war
515
00:18:44,740 --> 00:18:45,907
and why we're fighting it?!
516
00:18:45,942 --> 00:18:47,241
Okay, Frenchy,
517
00:18:47,276 --> 00:18:48,859
before you break
into the "Marseillay."
518
00:18:48,894 --> 00:18:50,378
"Marseillaise."
519
00:18:50,413 --> 00:18:52,441
All right, you've
made your point.
520
00:18:52,465 --> 00:18:55,566
I guess I can stand to be
a caveman for a few days.
521
00:18:55,601 --> 00:18:58,002
That goes for the
rest of you guys, too.
522
00:18:58,037 --> 00:19:00,699
Hey, come on, move
on back down there.
523
00:19:00,723 --> 00:19:01,772
Get closer.
524
00:19:01,807 --> 00:19:03,252
Make room for the fugitives
525
00:19:03,276 --> 00:19:04,556
from Barracks Three!
526
00:19:11,517 --> 00:19:13,395
Oh, good morning, Colonel Klink.
527
00:19:13,419 --> 00:19:15,152
Good morning, Bruno.
528
00:19:15,188 --> 00:19:16,820
Just came down to check
529
00:19:16,856 --> 00:19:18,722
where I start with
Fraulein Baermann.
530
00:19:18,758 --> 00:19:21,725
I mean, about my
skiing lessons, of course.
531
00:19:21,761 --> 00:19:23,794
That's marvelous.
532
00:19:23,829 --> 00:19:26,530
Oh, Colonel, it's
wonderful to see a man
533
00:19:26,565 --> 00:19:28,527
who faces death
seven days a week
534
00:19:28,551 --> 00:19:30,195
and still has a sense of humor.
535
00:19:30,219 --> 00:19:33,237
I guess maybe that is
the way all heroes are.
536
00:19:33,272 --> 00:19:36,623
Oh, Bruno, I'm a far
cry from being a hero.
537
00:19:36,659 --> 00:19:38,292
I believe the Colonel forgets
538
00:19:38,328 --> 00:19:40,744
that little slip of the
tongue last night.
539
00:19:40,779 --> 00:19:42,112
"Slip of the tongue," huh?
540
00:19:42,148 --> 00:19:44,048
About the three medals
541
00:19:44,083 --> 00:19:46,078
personally presented
by the Führer himself.
542
00:19:46,102 --> 00:19:47,818
I didn't, did I?
543
00:19:47,853 --> 00:19:50,254
Yes, you did.
544
00:19:51,257 --> 00:19:53,140
"Killer Klink."
545
00:19:53,176 --> 00:19:55,626
Not my nickname, too?
546
00:19:58,964 --> 00:20:00,781
Oh, but do not worry, Colonel,
547
00:20:00,816 --> 00:20:03,050
I haven't said a
word to anyone else.
548
00:20:03,085 --> 00:20:05,202
Your secret is safe with me.
549
00:20:05,237 --> 00:20:06,320
Ah, that's good.
550
00:20:06,356 --> 00:20:07,521
Thank you, Bruno.
551
00:20:07,557 --> 00:20:08,789
Well, I'm here to forget
552
00:20:08,825 --> 00:20:10,290
all about the war for awhile.
553
00:20:10,326 --> 00:20:13,126
I'm sick and tired of
fighting and bloodshed.
554
00:20:13,162 --> 00:20:16,347
For the next two weeks
it's death takes a holiday.
555
00:20:16,382 --> 00:20:17,926
Oh, I meant to
tell you, Colonel.
556
00:20:17,950 --> 00:20:19,795
General Burkhalter
is very anxious...
557
00:20:19,819 --> 00:20:21,347
He didn't call again, did he?
558
00:20:21,371 --> 00:20:22,836
Well, I'm still not in.
559
00:20:22,872 --> 00:20:24,571
The next time he calls,
560
00:20:24,607 --> 00:20:26,285
I'm in, but I've just gone out.
561
00:20:26,309 --> 00:20:28,876
But, Colonel, I think
you had better...
562
00:20:28,911 --> 00:20:30,022
No, no, no, no...
563
00:20:30,046 --> 00:20:31,390
I do not want to talk to him.
564
00:20:31,414 --> 00:20:32,924
He's probably
found out something
565
00:20:32,948 --> 00:20:34,626
about some paperwork
I've done wrong
566
00:20:34,650 --> 00:20:35,960
and that'll give him a chance
567
00:20:35,984 --> 00:20:37,762
to yell at someone
for an hour or two.
568
00:20:37,786 --> 00:20:39,164
You know something, Bruno?
569
00:20:39,188 --> 00:20:41,099
Fat men are
supposed to be jolly.
570
00:20:41,123 --> 00:20:43,668
General Burkhalter is
just a nasty old tub of lard.
571
00:20:43,692 --> 00:20:45,137
Colonel...
572
00:20:45,161 --> 00:20:47,038
And the next time
he phones, I'm out.
573
00:20:47,062 --> 00:20:49,480
He didn't call this time.
574
00:20:49,515 --> 00:20:51,081
He didn't?
575
00:20:51,117 --> 00:20:53,361
Well, if he didn't, he
probably telegraphed,
576
00:20:53,385 --> 00:20:54,730
and if he didn't telegraph,
577
00:20:54,754 --> 00:20:56,765
he's probably standing
right behind me.
578
00:20:58,223 --> 00:21:00,502
Oh! What a wonderful
surprise, General Burkhalter.
579
00:21:00,526 --> 00:21:02,137
I knew you were
here all the time.
580
00:21:02,161 --> 00:21:03,922
I bet you're ready
to blow your lard...
581
00:21:03,946 --> 00:21:05,212
I mean...
582
00:21:05,248 --> 00:21:07,175
You know I was only
kidding, don't you?
583
00:21:07,199 --> 00:21:09,033
Of course you were.
584
00:21:09,068 --> 00:21:11,035
And I want you to know
585
00:21:11,070 --> 00:21:13,370
I haven't laughed
like this in years.
586
00:21:13,405 --> 00:21:16,840
Yes, sir, as I said before,
it's a wonderful surprise.
587
00:21:16,876 --> 00:21:18,753
Are you here for
any special reason?
588
00:21:18,777 --> 00:21:20,344
Yes, I am, Klink.
589
00:21:20,380 --> 00:21:23,680
Since you were obviously
ducking my phone calls,
590
00:21:23,716 --> 00:21:25,900
I decided to see you personally.
591
00:21:25,935 --> 00:21:27,312
Ducking your phone calls, sir?
592
00:21:27,336 --> 00:21:28,713
Bruno, why didn't you tell me
593
00:21:28,737 --> 00:21:29,948
General Burkhalter was...
594
00:21:29,972 --> 00:21:31,255
Klink!
595
00:21:31,290 --> 00:21:33,040
I heard everything you said.
596
00:21:33,075 --> 00:21:34,909
Yes, sir.
597
00:21:34,944 --> 00:21:36,989
Now, you know I
was only kidding.
598
00:21:37,013 --> 00:21:39,713
It was all said in very good fun
599
00:21:39,749 --> 00:21:40,926
and I hope you
took it in the spirit
600
00:21:40,950 --> 00:21:42,060
that it was intended to.
601
00:21:42,084 --> 00:21:43,461
After all, I would
be the last man to...
602
00:21:43,485 --> 00:21:44,652
Shut up, Klink.
603
00:21:44,687 --> 00:21:45,986
Yes, sir.
604
00:21:46,022 --> 00:21:47,888
Let us go to your room.
605
00:21:47,923 --> 00:21:50,741
I will do the talking
while you do the packing.
606
00:21:50,776 --> 00:21:51,854
Yes, sir, that's fine.
607
00:21:51,878 --> 00:21:52,954
You do the talking...
608
00:21:52,978 --> 00:21:54,072
Did you say "packing"?
609
00:21:54,096 --> 00:21:56,213
That's right, "Killer."
610
00:21:56,249 --> 00:21:59,182
What you said
is absolutely true.
611
00:21:59,218 --> 00:22:02,553
I really am a nasty
old tub of lard.
612
00:22:10,780 --> 00:22:13,747
Yes, sir, I know the Sixth
Division has been tied up
613
00:22:13,783 --> 00:22:15,349
for three days.
614
00:22:15,384 --> 00:22:18,218
Yes, sir, it is a problem.
615
00:22:18,253 --> 00:22:19,653
However, I'm sure you'll agree
616
00:22:19,689 --> 00:22:21,555
that no one's really
to blame for it...
617
00:22:21,591 --> 00:22:23,457
That's exactly what
I was saying, sir...
618
00:22:23,493 --> 00:22:25,392
No one's really to
blame for it but me.
619
00:22:25,427 --> 00:22:27,473
Tell Marshal
Goering I said hello.
620
00:22:27,497 --> 00:22:29,697
Klink, this is a
private conversation.
621
00:22:29,732 --> 00:22:32,332
I'm sorry, I only wanted
to pay my respects.
622
00:22:32,368 --> 00:22:34,735
Yes, sir, you're
absolutely right, sir.
623
00:22:34,770 --> 00:22:36,670
It is my problem
624
00:22:36,706 --> 00:22:39,540
and I will personally
take care of it at once.
625
00:22:39,575 --> 00:22:43,143
Yes, sir, it is as good as done.
626
00:22:43,178 --> 00:22:44,945
Nice talking to you again.
627
00:22:44,981 --> 00:22:47,014
Please give Mrs. Goering my...
628
00:22:50,853 --> 00:22:52,586
Swine.
629
00:22:52,622 --> 00:22:54,254
Is something wrong, sir?
630
00:22:55,791 --> 00:22:57,758
Marshall Goering
has issued an order
631
00:22:57,793 --> 00:22:59,638
that all of the
escaped prisoners
632
00:22:59,662 --> 00:23:01,629
are to be found by
tomorrow morning.
633
00:23:01,664 --> 00:23:03,108
Well, General Burkhalter,
634
00:23:03,132 --> 00:23:04,665
do you think it can be done?
635
00:23:04,700 --> 00:23:06,400
I don't see how...
636
00:23:06,435 --> 00:23:08,780
But this is your
problem, not mine.
637
00:23:08,804 --> 00:23:10,004
My problem?
638
00:23:10,039 --> 00:23:11,438
It was your problem a moment ago
639
00:23:11,473 --> 00:23:13,106
when you spoke to
Field Marshal Goering.
640
00:23:13,142 --> 00:23:14,909
Yes, it was.
641
00:23:14,944 --> 00:23:17,811
But luckily, I'm not talking
to Marshal Goering now.
642
00:23:17,847 --> 00:23:21,081
I am talking to Colonel Klink!
643
00:23:21,116 --> 00:23:25,185
A man with a very big
problem on his hands.
644
00:23:25,221 --> 00:23:26,682
Sorry to barge in
on you, Colonel,
645
00:23:26,706 --> 00:23:28,550
but this is terribly
important. Hi, General.
646
00:23:28,574 --> 00:23:30,652
I want to ask you, sir...
No, I want to beg you...
647
00:23:30,676 --> 00:23:32,075
Not to be too tough
648
00:23:32,110 --> 00:23:33,355
on those poor, misguided men.
649
00:23:33,379 --> 00:23:34,645
What men?
650
00:23:34,680 --> 00:23:36,057
The 30 escaped prisoners.
651
00:23:36,081 --> 00:23:38,327
It was an obvious case of
mass temporary insanity.
652
00:23:38,351 --> 00:23:39,877
You will let them off
easy, won't you, sir?
653
00:23:39,901 --> 00:23:41,818
You know where they are?
654
00:23:41,854 --> 00:23:44,405
No, sir, but once they hear that
Colonel Klink's back in charge,
655
00:23:44,440 --> 00:23:46,067
naturally they'll
turn themselves in.
656
00:23:46,091 --> 00:23:49,659
Why would they do a
crazy thing like that?
657
00:23:49,695 --> 00:23:51,044
It would be crazy not to.
658
00:23:51,080 --> 00:23:52,991
They know Colonel
Klink won't sleep
659
00:23:53,015 --> 00:23:55,215
until he catches
every last one of them.
660
00:23:55,251 --> 00:23:57,329
And he's awfully mean
when he doesn't sleep.
661
00:23:57,353 --> 00:23:58,652
I think you are the one
662
00:23:58,687 --> 00:24:00,620
with the temporary
insanity, Hogan.
663
00:24:00,656 --> 00:24:03,390
If the entire Sixth
Division couldn't find them,
664
00:24:03,426 --> 00:24:05,075
how is this, uh...
665
00:24:05,110 --> 00:24:08,144
Herr Kommandant, it is them.
666
00:24:08,180 --> 00:24:11,681
All the escaped prisoners
are back in the barracks.
667
00:24:14,036 --> 00:24:16,920
They got here sooner
than I expected, sir.
668
00:24:16,955 --> 00:24:19,251
I hope you'll find it in your
heart, sir, to be lenient.
669
00:24:19,275 --> 00:24:20,369
I will, Hogan.
670
00:24:20,393 --> 00:24:21,820
I also hope you find
it in your heart, sir,
671
00:24:21,844 --> 00:24:23,755
to give us some of the
supplies we're running short on.
672
00:24:23,779 --> 00:24:25,540
We'll talk about
that some other time.
673
00:24:25,564 --> 00:24:26,941
It's perfectly all right, sir.
674
00:24:26,965 --> 00:24:28,076
I've made out a list.
675
00:24:28,100 --> 00:24:29,110
If you'll just okay it,
676
00:24:29,134 --> 00:24:30,479
I'm quite sure Sergeant Schultz
677
00:24:30,503 --> 00:24:31,613
can run it over to supply.
678
00:24:31,637 --> 00:24:32,848
Oh, you don't have a pen.
679
00:24:32,872 --> 00:24:34,671
Here...
680
00:24:34,707 --> 00:24:35,987
Use mine.
48764
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