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1
00:00:48,916 --> 00:00:50,615
Mm-hmm...
2
00:00:50,651 --> 00:00:52,016
Anything interesting, Colonel?
3
00:00:52,052 --> 00:00:53,852
Yeah, might be...
It's from Burkhalter.
4
00:00:53,887 --> 00:00:55,465
It's an order to
keep all prisoners
5
00:00:55,489 --> 00:00:57,033
in the barracks
today until 4:00.
6
00:00:57,057 --> 00:00:58,089
Why?
7
00:00:58,124 --> 00:00:59,090
Doesn't say.
8
00:00:59,125 --> 00:01:00,291
I wonder what it is
9
00:01:00,327 --> 00:01:01,927
they don't want us to see.
10
00:01:01,962 --> 00:01:03,728
I'm curious myself.
11
00:01:03,764 --> 00:01:05,764
I'll put this back
on Klink's desk...
12
00:01:05,799 --> 00:01:06,865
after 4:00.
13
00:01:08,685 --> 00:01:10,485
Hey, look what I found.
14
00:01:13,657 --> 00:01:15,001
You'd better lose him, quick.
15
00:01:15,025 --> 00:01:16,636
I thought we'd
keep him for a pet.
16
00:01:16,660 --> 00:01:18,092
Come on, you know
the camp rules...
17
00:01:18,128 --> 00:01:19,427
We're not allowed to have pets.
18
00:01:20,998 --> 00:01:22,575
You see, he knows
what you're saying.
19
00:01:22,599 --> 00:01:24,232
Sorry, I don't
make up the rules.
20
00:01:24,268 --> 00:01:25,711
Can we please keep him, Colonel?
21
00:01:25,735 --> 00:01:26,935
He's a great watchdog.
22
00:01:26,970 --> 00:01:28,336
LeBeau, this is a prison camp...
23
00:01:28,372 --> 00:01:29,704
Nobody's breaking in.
24
00:01:29,739 --> 00:01:31,539
You're going to
have to get rid of him.
25
00:01:33,059 --> 00:01:34,926
Sorry, old-timer.
26
00:01:34,961 --> 00:01:36,311
Oh, it's a rotten shame.
27
00:01:36,346 --> 00:01:37,857
It'd be fun to have a dog.
28
00:01:37,881 --> 00:01:40,832
What are we doing inside?
29
00:01:40,868 --> 00:01:43,669
The schedule calls
for calisthenics.
30
00:01:43,704 --> 00:01:45,816
Schultz, we're getting a
little bored with the pushups.
31
00:01:45,840 --> 00:01:47,551
We're planning a
different kind of exercise.
32
00:01:47,575 --> 00:01:48,540
What do you have in mind?
33
00:01:48,576 --> 00:01:49,541
A cross-country run.
34
00:01:49,577 --> 00:01:50,909
Hmm, yeah, yeah...
35
00:01:50,945 --> 00:01:53,545
Running in the fresh air,
it's very good exercise...
36
00:01:54,949 --> 00:01:57,148
Out of the question,
37
00:01:57,184 --> 00:01:59,329
absolutely out of the question.
38
00:02:02,523 --> 00:02:03,633
What was that?
39
00:02:03,657 --> 00:02:05,474
Now you're supposed to guess.
40
00:02:05,509 --> 00:02:07,309
I'll do the imitation again.
41
00:02:11,515 --> 00:02:12,847
That's a dog!
42
00:02:12,883 --> 00:02:15,066
Right... give that man a cigar.
43
00:02:15,101 --> 00:02:17,169
Now, for my next imitation...
44
00:02:17,204 --> 00:02:19,905
Ah, that animal is
against the rules!
45
00:02:19,940 --> 00:02:21,685
But you have dogs in camp.
46
00:02:21,709 --> 00:02:23,575
Those are killers.
47
00:02:23,610 --> 00:02:25,359
To keep a dog for pleasure
48
00:02:25,395 --> 00:02:26,879
is not permitted.
49
00:02:26,914 --> 00:02:28,747
All right, hold it.
50
00:02:28,782 --> 00:02:30,816
We're just going to
have to cut Schultz in.
51
00:02:30,851 --> 00:02:33,886
You familiar with this breed?
52
00:02:33,921 --> 00:02:35,904
With that?
53
00:02:35,939 --> 00:02:38,389
It's a little bit of
this, a little bit of that.
54
00:02:38,425 --> 00:02:39,891
You hit it right on the head.
55
00:02:39,927 --> 00:02:42,360
A lot of dogs have two
or three different breeds.
56
00:02:42,395 --> 00:02:44,930
That dog has five percent
of 20 different breeds.
57
00:02:44,965 --> 00:02:47,032
There's only three
like him in the world.
58
00:02:47,067 --> 00:02:48,166
He's worth a fortune.
59
00:02:48,201 --> 00:02:50,569
Is that right?
60
00:02:50,604 --> 00:02:52,737
But... if he is so valuable,
61
00:02:52,773 --> 00:02:53,973
how come you have him?
62
00:02:54,007 --> 00:02:56,307
Well, the dog doesn't
belong to us, he's lost.
63
00:02:56,342 --> 00:02:58,910
And the owner has offered
a reward for his return...
64
00:02:58,946 --> 00:03:00,979
100 marks.
65
00:03:01,014 --> 00:03:02,513
100 marks for that?
66
00:03:02,549 --> 00:03:04,360
What are we waiting for?
67
00:03:04,384 --> 00:03:06,295
Let's collect the reward.
68
00:03:06,319 --> 00:03:08,119
What's the rush?
69
00:03:08,154 --> 00:03:09,654
It will go up to 500 marks,
70
00:03:09,690 --> 00:03:11,456
and we're partners.
71
00:03:13,159 --> 00:03:14,503
Who would be that stupid
72
00:03:14,527 --> 00:03:16,647
to give so much money?
73
00:03:17,197 --> 00:03:18,863
General Brechschneider?
74
00:03:20,033 --> 00:03:21,878
Yup, he is that stupid.
75
00:03:21,902 --> 00:03:24,819
Now, Hogan, we are partners?
76
00:03:24,854 --> 00:03:26,554
We have a contract.
77
00:03:26,589 --> 00:03:27,788
Coochie-coochie...
78
00:03:32,195 --> 00:03:35,196
Colonel, does that
mean I can keep him?
79
00:03:35,232 --> 00:03:37,598
Of course not.
80
00:03:37,634 --> 00:03:40,201
Only until General
Brechschneider pays
81
00:03:40,237 --> 00:03:41,869
the reward of 500 marks.
82
00:03:55,335 --> 00:03:59,237
One, two, three, four.
83
00:03:59,272 --> 00:04:03,057
One, two, three, four.
84
00:04:03,092 --> 00:04:04,092
One...
85
00:04:05,261 --> 00:04:07,562
Wow, look at the
size of those tanks.
86
00:04:07,598 --> 00:04:11,249
No wonder they wanted
us to stay in the barracks.
87
00:04:11,284 --> 00:04:13,651
It's their newest
model, mounted 88s.
88
00:04:13,687 --> 00:04:18,256
Heavier armor plate,
faster, bigger tracks.
89
00:04:18,291 --> 00:04:21,442
Be nice if the Allies
knew about this.
90
00:04:21,478 --> 00:04:24,396
Carter... now.
91
00:04:24,431 --> 00:04:25,442
Okay, Colonel.
92
00:04:28,068 --> 00:04:29,212
Oh, it's the heat!
93
00:04:29,236 --> 00:04:30,435
It's worse.
94
00:04:30,471 --> 00:04:31,747
Oh, I feel like I...
95
00:04:31,771 --> 00:04:33,037
Carter!
96
00:04:33,072 --> 00:04:34,839
Just faint.
97
00:04:37,410 --> 00:04:39,093
All right, all
right, give him air.
98
00:04:39,129 --> 00:04:41,212
It must have been
the cold that caused it.
99
00:04:41,248 --> 00:04:42,464
All right, Carter,
100
00:04:42,499 --> 00:04:43,698
out with the camera, quick.
101
00:04:43,734 --> 00:04:44,833
I want a lot of pictures.
102
00:04:44,868 --> 00:04:46,367
Keep them coming,
and don't stop.
103
00:04:46,403 --> 00:04:47,969
I want plenty of
them, get them all.
104
00:04:48,005 --> 00:04:49,482
LeBEAU: Here comes
the commandant.
105
00:04:49,506 --> 00:04:50,889
All right, watch out, quick.
106
00:04:50,924 --> 00:04:52,106
Attention!
107
00:04:52,142 --> 00:04:53,441
Everybody, attention!
108
00:04:53,476 --> 00:04:54,442
What's going on here?
109
00:04:54,477 --> 00:04:55,822
Why isn't this man at attention?
110
00:04:55,846 --> 00:04:57,323
I believe he's
fainted, commandant.
111
00:04:57,347 --> 00:05:00,231
That's no excuse...
That's very unmilitary.
112
00:05:00,266 --> 00:05:02,500
I'll speak sharply to
him when he comes to.
113
00:05:04,621 --> 00:05:05,654
Aha!
114
00:05:05,689 --> 00:05:06,788
The new tanks.
115
00:05:06,823 --> 00:05:08,167
Oh, is that your new ones, sir?
116
00:05:08,191 --> 00:05:09,157
I hadn't noticed.
117
00:05:09,192 --> 00:05:10,358
You wouldn't notice
118
00:05:10,393 --> 00:05:12,827
till they walked right
up to you and bit you.
119
00:05:17,317 --> 00:05:18,644
What are your men doing here?
120
00:05:18,668 --> 00:05:21,219
Just following your
orders about calisthenics...
121
00:05:21,255 --> 00:05:23,233
You know, mens
sana in corpore sano...
122
00:05:23,257 --> 00:05:24,972
A sound mind in a sound body.
123
00:05:25,008 --> 00:05:27,103
You don't have
to translate to me;
124
00:05:27,127 --> 00:05:28,387
I understand French.
125
00:05:28,411 --> 00:05:29,544
It's Latin.
126
00:05:29,580 --> 00:05:32,030
Your accent is terrible.
127
00:05:32,065 --> 00:05:33,898
Go on with your calisthenics!
128
00:05:33,933 --> 00:05:35,433
All right, let's have it!
129
00:05:35,468 --> 00:05:36,718
Exercises!
130
00:05:36,753 --> 00:05:38,053
Mmm, there is no word
131
00:05:38,088 --> 00:05:39,353
from General Brechschneider
132
00:05:39,389 --> 00:05:40,922
about the dog, huh?
133
00:05:40,958 --> 00:05:42,501
Not yet, but the
longer he waits,
134
00:05:42,525 --> 00:05:44,270
the higher the reward will be.
135
00:05:44,294 --> 00:05:45,426
Exercises!
136
00:05:45,462 --> 00:05:47,929
Exercises...
137
00:05:47,965 --> 00:05:49,530
All right, Carter.
138
00:05:49,566 --> 00:05:51,265
Keep taking pictures.
139
00:05:51,301 --> 00:05:53,668
I'll try to keep Klink
from wandering around.
140
00:05:53,704 --> 00:05:55,169
Get plenty of them.
141
00:05:57,991 --> 00:05:58,957
Come in, come in.
142
00:05:58,992 --> 00:06:00,036
Yes, Hogan, what is it?
143
00:06:00,060 --> 00:06:01,137
I, uh, I, um...
144
00:06:01,161 --> 00:06:02,293
You know, Hogan,
145
00:06:02,329 --> 00:06:03,729
I didn't like that man fainting.
146
00:06:03,764 --> 00:06:05,397
That doesn't look very good.
147
00:06:05,432 --> 00:06:07,210
That's what I wanted
to talk to you about.
148
00:06:07,234 --> 00:06:09,245
I think he needs a rest.
149
00:06:09,269 --> 00:06:10,469
Oh, you do, huh?
150
00:06:10,504 --> 00:06:11,681
Mm-hmm.
151
00:06:11,705 --> 00:06:13,304
How about a resort
in the Swiss Alps?
152
00:06:13,340 --> 00:06:14,873
I understand the
skiing is very good
153
00:06:14,908 --> 00:06:15,874
this time of year.
154
00:06:15,909 --> 00:06:17,476
Sounds good.
155
00:06:17,511 --> 00:06:19,456
Seems to me a warmer climate...
156
00:06:19,480 --> 00:06:22,191
Say, uh, the French
Riviera would be good.
157
00:06:22,215 --> 00:06:24,549
Oh... how about a real vacation,
158
00:06:24,585 --> 00:06:26,618
maybe a few weeks in Berlin?
159
00:06:26,653 --> 00:06:27,819
No, from what I hear,
160
00:06:27,855 --> 00:06:30,066
it's too hot for anyone
in Berlin right now.
161
00:06:30,090 --> 00:06:31,901
Missed a spot by
your sideburn, sir.
162
00:06:31,925 --> 00:06:33,425
Oh, yes, yes, yes.
163
00:06:33,460 --> 00:06:35,494
Hogan, let me remind
you of something...
164
00:06:35,529 --> 00:06:38,997
Oh, oh, General Burkhalter.
165
00:06:39,032 --> 00:06:40,799
What a pleasure to see you, sir.
166
00:06:40,834 --> 00:06:41,944
Klink, how is it
167
00:06:41,968 --> 00:06:43,980
that you get so
much more pleasure
168
00:06:44,004 --> 00:06:45,437
out of seeing me
169
00:06:45,472 --> 00:06:47,873
than I do out of seeing you?
170
00:06:47,908 --> 00:06:49,408
Because you're
a better man, sir.
171
00:06:49,443 --> 00:06:50,876
You're much more
of a human being.
172
00:06:50,911 --> 00:06:52,343
You have wonderful qualities...
173
00:06:52,379 --> 00:06:53,956
Klink, shut up
and wipe your face.
174
00:06:53,980 --> 00:06:55,246
Wipe my face...
175
00:06:55,282 --> 00:06:56,748
Oh, I was shaving, sir, shaving.
176
00:06:56,784 --> 00:06:57,982
Glad to hear it...
177
00:06:58,018 --> 00:06:59,161
I thought you had rabies.
178
00:06:59,185 --> 00:07:00,952
"Rabies..." oh,
that's a good one.
179
00:07:00,987 --> 00:07:02,687
Very funny, "rabies."
180
00:07:02,723 --> 00:07:05,067
What are those prisoners
doing at the fence?
181
00:07:05,091 --> 00:07:06,057
Exercising, sir.
182
00:07:06,092 --> 00:07:07,793
That's just part of my program.
183
00:07:07,828 --> 00:07:09,861
You know the old
Latin saying, uh...
184
00:07:09,896 --> 00:07:11,763
Mens sana in corpore sano.
185
00:07:11,799 --> 00:07:13,031
That's the one.
186
00:07:13,066 --> 00:07:14,677
So you thought that
was more important
187
00:07:14,701 --> 00:07:15,650
than the special order
188
00:07:15,685 --> 00:07:17,018
I sent this morning
189
00:07:17,053 --> 00:07:18,620
telling you to
keep the prisoners
190
00:07:18,655 --> 00:07:20,221
in their barracks?!
191
00:07:20,256 --> 00:07:21,940
Sir, I didn't get any order.
192
00:07:21,975 --> 00:07:23,274
I give you my word of honor
193
00:07:23,310 --> 00:07:25,237
as an officer and a
gentleman, I received nothing.
194
00:07:25,261 --> 00:07:27,512
Please, please, take
a look for yourself, sir.
195
00:07:27,547 --> 00:07:29,080
Now, there was no order in here.
196
00:07:29,116 --> 00:07:31,616
Now, you know very well
I would never overlook...
197
00:07:32,786 --> 00:07:36,288
Tell me, Mr. Officer
and Gentleman,
198
00:07:36,323 --> 00:07:37,789
how did this get here?
199
00:07:37,824 --> 00:07:39,824
Was it left by the Good Fairy?
200
00:07:39,859 --> 00:07:40,825
I, I...
201
00:07:40,860 --> 00:07:42,227
Klink!
202
00:07:42,262 --> 00:07:43,694
The High Command wanted
203
00:07:43,730 --> 00:07:46,314
a certain operation
as secret as possible.
204
00:07:46,349 --> 00:07:48,016
Well!
205
00:07:48,051 --> 00:07:50,451
I can assure you,
General Burkhalter,
206
00:07:50,486 --> 00:07:52,553
nothing gets out of this prison.
207
00:07:52,589 --> 00:07:54,388
Don't be too sure.
208
00:07:54,424 --> 00:07:56,591
You may be getting out.
209
00:07:56,626 --> 00:07:58,960
Sir, the prisoners
did not see a thing.
210
00:07:58,995 --> 00:08:00,762
I can assure you.
211
00:08:00,797 --> 00:08:02,864
Colonel Hogan,
you were with them;
212
00:08:02,899 --> 00:08:05,499
now, you didn't see
any new tanks, did you?
213
00:08:05,535 --> 00:08:07,802
Not until you called
them to my attention, sir.
214
00:08:13,092 --> 00:08:14,692
Allied High Command in London.
215
00:08:14,727 --> 00:08:17,895
They want the pictures of
the new tanks right away, huh?
216
00:08:19,566 --> 00:08:21,098
"An agent will pick them up.
217
00:08:21,134 --> 00:08:23,467
Wait for contact with
a 'Rumpelstiltskin.'"
218
00:08:23,503 --> 00:08:25,469
Who is Rumpelstiltskin?
219
00:08:25,505 --> 00:08:27,739
Well, since he's going
to get in touch with us,
220
00:08:27,774 --> 00:08:29,619
it's someone who's
in camp right now...
221
00:08:29,643 --> 00:08:30,908
Or is coming here.
222
00:08:30,944 --> 00:08:32,443
All done.
223
00:08:32,478 --> 00:08:34,445
And a good job, if
I do say so myself.
224
00:08:35,615 --> 00:08:36,580
Yeah... very good.
225
00:08:36,616 --> 00:08:37,627
This all you took?
226
00:08:37,651 --> 00:08:39,183
Yeah, well, Schultz
came, you know,
227
00:08:39,218 --> 00:08:40,918
and chased us
back to the barracks.
228
00:08:40,954 --> 00:08:42,286
I was going to put
229
00:08:42,321 --> 00:08:43,621
another roll in the camera,
230
00:08:43,657 --> 00:08:44,889
but I didn't have time...
231
00:08:46,292 --> 00:08:47,458
Oh, boy.
232
00:08:47,493 --> 00:08:48,793
What's the matter?
233
00:08:48,828 --> 00:08:50,895
I left the camera
near the fence.
234
00:08:52,048 --> 00:08:54,665
Of all the idiotic things.
235
00:08:54,701 --> 00:08:56,913
If they find that
camera before we do,
236
00:08:56,937 --> 00:08:58,536
we're in trouble.
237
00:08:58,571 --> 00:09:00,671
I think I'm really
going to faint.
238
00:09:03,877 --> 00:09:05,844
No film.
239
00:09:05,879 --> 00:09:07,845
Exactly where did you find this?
240
00:09:07,880 --> 00:09:09,558
Near the fence, Herr Kommandant.
241
00:09:09,582 --> 00:09:11,049
Where the men were exercising?
242
00:09:11,084 --> 00:09:12,395
Jawohl, Herr Kommandant.
243
00:09:12,419 --> 00:09:14,819
Herr Kommandant,
if nobody claims it,
244
00:09:14,854 --> 00:09:16,771
may I keep it?
245
00:09:16,806 --> 00:09:18,751
Don't worry,
somebody will claim it.
246
00:09:18,775 --> 00:09:20,207
Oh, you know who owns it?
247
00:09:20,243 --> 00:09:21,793
Of course I know.
248
00:09:21,828 --> 00:09:23,528
But he doesn't know that I know,
249
00:09:23,563 --> 00:09:25,897
which means that I know
what he doesn't know.
250
00:09:25,932 --> 00:09:27,415
Do you know what that means?
251
00:09:27,450 --> 00:09:29,767
That I don't get the camera.
252
00:09:29,802 --> 00:09:31,920
Stupid... that means
253
00:09:31,955 --> 00:09:34,856
that I am much smarter
than Colonel Hogan.
254
00:09:34,891 --> 00:09:36,758
This time he's gone too far.
255
00:09:36,793 --> 00:09:38,827
If you're worried about
them finding that camera,
256
00:09:38,862 --> 00:09:40,595
all we have to do is
deny we ever saw it.
257
00:09:40,630 --> 00:09:42,341
Yeah, it's their word
against ours, sir.
258
00:09:42,365 --> 00:09:43,625
It isn't that simple.
259
00:09:43,649 --> 00:09:45,767
Once Klink's
suspicion is aroused,
260
00:09:45,802 --> 00:09:47,780
it's going to make
it that much harder
261
00:09:47,804 --> 00:09:49,515
for Rumpelstiltskin
to contact us.
262
00:09:49,539 --> 00:09:51,906
In the meantime, until
we know exactly where,
263
00:09:51,942 --> 00:09:54,308
when and with whom
the contact is being made,
264
00:09:54,344 --> 00:09:57,945
I'm going to carry this film
around with me all the time.
265
00:09:57,980 --> 00:09:59,447
It does make it a problem.
266
00:09:59,482 --> 00:10:01,065
Sticky wicket.
267
00:10:02,435 --> 00:10:03,835
Go on, say it!
268
00:10:03,870 --> 00:10:05,336
It's all my fault.
269
00:10:05,371 --> 00:10:06,949
Why don't you say it?
270
00:10:06,973 --> 00:10:09,006
All right, it's all your fault.
271
00:10:09,042 --> 00:10:10,007
It is?
272
00:10:10,043 --> 00:10:11,253
You mean it?
273
00:10:11,277 --> 00:10:13,077
Of course not, Carter,
it was an accident...
274
00:10:13,113 --> 00:10:14,395
Could have happened to anyone.
275
00:10:14,430 --> 00:10:16,459
If we weren't ordered
to stay in the barracks,
276
00:10:16,483 --> 00:10:17,810
we could find that camera, sir.
277
00:10:17,834 --> 00:10:19,712
Just have to wait
and play it by ear.
278
00:10:19,736 --> 00:10:21,313
I feel just awful.
279
00:10:21,337 --> 00:10:22,482
It really was my fault.
280
00:10:22,506 --> 00:10:23,716
Hi, Schultz.
281
00:10:23,740 --> 00:10:26,107
It's all right, it's all right.
282
00:10:26,142 --> 00:10:28,009
You don't have to get up,
283
00:10:28,044 --> 00:10:29,911
it's just a social visit.
284
00:10:29,946 --> 00:10:31,045
Everybody feel good?
285
00:10:31,080 --> 00:10:32,380
Mm-hmm.
286
00:10:32,415 --> 00:10:34,582
Good!
287
00:10:34,618 --> 00:10:36,529
Must have heard some
bad news about somebody
288
00:10:36,553 --> 00:10:37,819
to feel so good.
289
00:10:37,854 --> 00:10:39,921
I know nothing... nothing.
290
00:10:39,956 --> 00:10:42,891
I wouldn't call that
a secret, Schultz.
291
00:10:42,926 --> 00:10:45,259
Mmm, something smells very good.
292
00:10:45,294 --> 00:10:46,305
Schultz...
293
00:10:46,329 --> 00:10:47,461
Now, please, please.
294
00:10:51,968 --> 00:10:53,601
Mmm...
295
00:10:55,304 --> 00:10:58,222
It needs a little bit more salt.
296
00:11:00,092 --> 00:11:01,943
What's the matter with him?
297
00:11:01,978 --> 00:11:04,023
You're eating his dinner.
298
00:11:04,047 --> 00:11:06,614
Don't worry, there's
plenty left for you.
299
00:11:10,586 --> 00:11:12,564
When are we going
to collect the reward?
300
00:11:12,588 --> 00:11:14,433
Oh, we're waiting
for General Steiner
301
00:11:14,457 --> 00:11:15,601
to make a better offer.
302
00:11:15,625 --> 00:11:17,125
"General Steiner"?
303
00:11:17,160 --> 00:11:19,160
You told me
Breckschneider owns the dog.
304
00:11:19,195 --> 00:11:20,505
Oh, well, they're partners.
305
00:11:20,529 --> 00:11:22,108
I mean, a valuable dog like that
306
00:11:22,132 --> 00:11:24,043
couldn't be owned
by one man, Schultz.
307
00:11:24,067 --> 00:11:26,167
Well, to me he looks
like an ordinary dog.
308
00:11:26,202 --> 00:11:28,013
Well, to some people,
a diamond looks
309
00:11:28,037 --> 00:11:29,536
like a piece of glass.
310
00:11:29,572 --> 00:11:31,538
Well, then, make it
as fast as possible.
311
00:11:31,574 --> 00:11:32,807
You know the regulations.
312
00:11:32,842 --> 00:11:33,869
Mm-hmm.
313
00:11:33,893 --> 00:11:35,259
Oh, what was it
314
00:11:35,294 --> 00:11:36,794
I wanted to tell you?
315
00:11:36,830 --> 00:11:38,563
What was it?
316
00:11:38,598 --> 00:11:40,498
What was it?!
317
00:11:40,534 --> 00:11:42,567
Worst acting I've ever seen.
318
00:11:42,602 --> 00:11:44,569
Mmm!
319
00:11:44,604 --> 00:11:46,237
Ah...
320
00:11:46,272 --> 00:11:48,372
It was on the tip of my brain.
321
00:11:48,408 --> 00:11:49,874
What was it?
322
00:11:49,910 --> 00:11:51,475
Ah... now I remember.
323
00:11:51,511 --> 00:11:53,556
Yeah, I thought you would.
324
00:11:53,580 --> 00:11:55,780
The commandant wants
you to clean up the yard.
325
00:11:55,815 --> 00:11:57,660
Any particular area, Schultz?
326
00:11:57,684 --> 00:11:59,551
Yeah, wait a
minute, let me think.
327
00:11:59,586 --> 00:12:01,330
Where we were exercising today?
328
00:12:01,354 --> 00:12:02,954
Yeah, and he doesn't want you
329
00:12:02,989 --> 00:12:04,556
to miss any cigarette butts.
330
00:12:04,591 --> 00:12:05,751
Okay.
331
00:12:08,377 --> 00:12:10,055
Well, we know
where the camera is.
332
00:12:10,079 --> 00:12:11,612
Where?
333
00:12:11,647 --> 00:12:13,314
Right where you left it.
334
00:12:13,349 --> 00:12:15,327
Klink found it, put
it back to trap us.
335
00:12:15,351 --> 00:12:16,650
Come on, let's go.
336
00:12:16,686 --> 00:12:18,352
What are we going
to do, Colonel?
337
00:12:18,387 --> 00:12:20,988
For one thing, do a better
job of acting than he just did.
338
00:12:27,079 --> 00:12:30,125
All right, I want all these
cigarette butts picked up.
339
00:12:30,149 --> 00:12:31,115
All of them?
340
00:12:31,150 --> 00:12:32,116
All of them.
341
00:12:32,151 --> 00:12:33,151
Okay.
342
00:12:33,185 --> 00:12:35,119
You know, we're supposed
to be prisoners of war,
343
00:12:35,154 --> 00:12:36,120
not domestics, sir.
344
00:12:36,155 --> 00:12:37,767
That's right, you tell him.
345
00:12:37,791 --> 00:12:38,756
Just get them all.
346
00:12:38,792 --> 00:12:39,757
Even the paper, sir?
347
00:12:39,793 --> 00:12:40,758
All of them.
348
00:12:40,794 --> 00:12:42,443
Want to be proud of this camp.
349
00:12:42,478 --> 00:12:43,673
Oh, right, right.
350
00:12:43,697 --> 00:12:44,662
Yeah, sure.
351
00:12:44,698 --> 00:12:46,564
Here we go, then.
352
00:12:46,600 --> 00:12:47,999
Hey!
353
00:12:48,034 --> 00:12:50,034
Look what I found.
354
00:12:50,070 --> 00:12:51,018
It's a camera, isn't it?
355
00:12:51,053 --> 00:12:52,303
LeBEAU: Looks like a camera.
356
00:12:52,339 --> 00:12:53,855
Yeah, I wonder whose it is.
357
00:12:53,890 --> 00:12:54,905
It's not mine.
358
00:12:56,742 --> 00:12:59,055
I don't know, it looks
like an expensive one.
359
00:12:59,079 --> 00:13:00,122
Newkirk?
360
00:13:00,146 --> 00:13:01,112
Sir?
361
00:13:01,147 --> 00:13:02,959
Take this to Klink's office.
362
00:13:02,983 --> 00:13:04,899
Someone may be
looking for it, huh?
363
00:13:04,935 --> 00:13:06,367
Never mind! Hold it!
364
00:13:06,403 --> 00:13:07,579
Colonel Klink.
365
00:13:07,603 --> 00:13:08,780
Oh, you saved me a trip, sir,
366
00:13:08,804 --> 00:13:10,749
I was going to take this
camera to your office.
367
00:13:10,773 --> 00:13:12,501
That's right, some
idiot left it here.
368
00:13:12,525 --> 00:13:14,592
Careful what you are saying.
369
00:13:14,628 --> 00:13:16,794
The idiot you are talking about
370
00:13:16,830 --> 00:13:17,795
is Commandant Klink.
371
00:13:17,831 --> 00:13:19,313
Schultz!
372
00:13:19,349 --> 00:13:22,450
You shouldn't leave an expensive
camera like that laying around.
373
00:13:22,485 --> 00:13:24,001
Neither should you.
374
00:13:24,037 --> 00:13:25,130
Colonel, what are
you talking about?
375
00:13:25,154 --> 00:13:27,755
Hogan, don't play games with me,
376
00:13:27,790 --> 00:13:30,691
just tell me that
this is your camera.
377
00:13:30,727 --> 00:13:31,803
Okay, it's my camera.
378
00:13:31,827 --> 00:13:32,793
Aha!
379
00:13:32,828 --> 00:13:33,961
Then you admit it.
380
00:13:33,996 --> 00:13:35,907
No, you asked me
to tell you and I did.
381
00:13:35,931 --> 00:13:37,843
Is there anything else
you want me to tell you?
382
00:13:37,867 --> 00:13:39,166
All right, Hogan,
383
00:13:39,201 --> 00:13:41,802
if you say it's not your camera,
384
00:13:41,837 --> 00:13:43,170
we'll let it go just at that.
385
00:13:43,205 --> 00:13:44,171
No hard feelings?
386
00:13:44,206 --> 00:13:45,172
None at all, sir.
387
00:13:45,207 --> 00:13:46,190
Uh-huh.
388
00:13:46,226 --> 00:13:47,992
Schultz.
389
00:13:49,546 --> 00:13:52,463
Klink isn't going to
rest until he gets this.
390
00:13:52,498 --> 00:13:54,165
Weren't you afraid
he would search you?
391
00:13:54,200 --> 00:13:55,166
Not a chance...
392
00:13:55,201 --> 00:13:56,879
He's sure I wouldn't
be foolish enough
393
00:13:56,903 --> 00:13:57,851
to carry it with me.
394
00:13:57,887 --> 00:14:00,247
We should have searched him.
395
00:14:00,272 --> 00:14:02,840
He certainly would not
be carrying the film on him.
396
00:14:02,876 --> 00:14:05,426
Wouldn't he be hiding it?
397
00:14:05,461 --> 00:14:09,914
We are going to surprise
Hogan when he least expects it.
398
00:14:09,949 --> 00:14:12,183
Get a few men, and
in exactly one hour
399
00:14:12,218 --> 00:14:14,301
be ready to make
a thorough search.
400
00:14:14,337 --> 00:14:16,670
Jawohl, Herr Kommandant!
401
00:14:19,575 --> 00:14:21,192
Colonel Klink speaking.
402
00:14:21,228 --> 00:14:23,528
This is General Burkhalter.
403
00:14:23,563 --> 00:14:26,447
Ah, General Burkhalter, this
is indeed a great pleasure.
404
00:14:26,483 --> 00:14:28,682
Klink, stop with the pleasure.
405
00:14:28,717 --> 00:14:31,352
Sir, I cannot help
myself, I must be honest.
406
00:14:31,387 --> 00:14:33,454
Get your camp in order.
407
00:14:33,490 --> 00:14:34,522
Tomorrow morning,
408
00:14:34,557 --> 00:14:37,492
the Swiss Prison Commission
is paying you a visit
409
00:14:37,527 --> 00:14:40,294
and I want a favorable report.
410
00:14:40,330 --> 00:14:43,915
Don't worry, sir, I'm ready
at all time for an inspection.
411
00:14:43,950 --> 00:14:47,351
Pick out some special
prisoners for them to interview,
412
00:14:47,386 --> 00:14:50,387
ones you can depend
on to say they are happy.
413
00:14:50,423 --> 00:14:54,308
And make sure nobody
is in solitary confinement.
414
00:14:54,344 --> 00:14:56,071
It's as good as
done, Herr General.
415
00:14:56,095 --> 00:14:58,015
And may I say
to you, sir, that...
416
00:15:02,452 --> 00:15:04,302
Prussian.
417
00:15:04,337 --> 00:15:05,303
Oh, don't tell me
418
00:15:05,338 --> 00:15:08,017
you're going to feed
that swill to that poor dog.
419
00:15:08,041 --> 00:15:10,308
It isn't for him;
this is our dinner.
420
00:15:10,343 --> 00:15:11,309
What is it?
421
00:15:11,344 --> 00:15:12,688
I never know till I finish it.
422
00:15:12,712 --> 00:15:14,823
Oh, it'll be the
finish of us, mate.
423
00:15:16,116 --> 00:15:18,582
I suppose nobody by the name
of "Rumpelstiltskin" showed up?
424
00:15:18,618 --> 00:15:20,596
No, we've had two "Rumpelmeyers"
425
00:15:20,620 --> 00:15:22,531
and a "Meyerrumpel," that's all.
426
00:15:22,555 --> 00:15:23,854
He'll show up sooner or later.
427
00:15:23,890 --> 00:15:25,701
Yeah, well, we're
running out of time.
428
00:15:25,725 --> 00:15:27,336
I don't feel safe
with this film on me.
429
00:15:27,360 --> 00:15:29,527
Any minute now,
Klink will show up and...
430
00:15:29,562 --> 00:15:31,262
Attention!
431
00:15:31,298 --> 00:15:32,474
The Commandant is here!
432
00:15:32,498 --> 00:15:33,597
There he is.
433
00:15:33,633 --> 00:15:34,598
Nobody move!
434
00:15:34,634 --> 00:15:35,600
Stay right where you are.
435
00:15:35,635 --> 00:15:38,986
I want every inch of
this place searched,
436
00:15:39,021 --> 00:15:40,454
and the men, too.
437
00:15:40,490 --> 00:15:42,756
Now, don't miss a
thing, look everywhere.
438
00:15:42,791 --> 00:15:45,960
Search the footlockers,
the mattresses.
439
00:15:45,995 --> 00:15:49,147
I don't want you
to miss anything.
440
00:15:51,134 --> 00:15:53,567
What was that dog doing here?
441
00:15:53,603 --> 00:15:55,603
He didn't say.
442
00:15:55,638 --> 00:15:57,872
Search everybody!
443
00:15:59,109 --> 00:16:00,374
Okay.
444
00:16:01,127 --> 00:16:02,693
Looking for anything
in particular?
445
00:16:02,728 --> 00:16:03,905
We'd be glad to help, sir.
446
00:16:03,929 --> 00:16:04,962
I mean, give us a clue.
447
00:16:04,998 --> 00:16:06,730
Is it animal,
vegetable, mineral?
448
00:16:06,765 --> 00:16:08,143
Put them all in the cooler!
449
00:16:08,167 --> 00:16:09,278
Jawohl, Herr Kommandant.
450
00:16:09,302 --> 00:16:11,602
We'll see if they feel
like making jokes there.
451
00:16:11,638 --> 00:16:13,037
Wait!
452
00:16:13,072 --> 00:16:14,316
They don't go into the cooler?
453
00:16:14,340 --> 00:16:15,406
No.
454
00:16:15,441 --> 00:16:18,042
The Swiss Prison Commission
is coming tomorrow.
455
00:16:18,077 --> 00:16:20,278
Now, after they go,
we'll take care of it.
456
00:16:20,313 --> 00:16:21,679
Now get this place cleaned up.
457
00:16:21,714 --> 00:16:23,247
There may be an
inspection later.
458
00:16:23,283 --> 00:16:24,615
Jawohl, Herr Kommandant.
459
00:16:24,651 --> 00:16:26,184
Clean up this place!
460
00:16:26,219 --> 00:16:28,339
Aye, Schultz.
461
00:16:32,909 --> 00:16:34,653
Hey, what'd you do
with the film, Colonel?
462
00:16:34,677 --> 00:16:36,187
Must have had a
great hiding place...
463
00:16:36,211 --> 00:16:37,289
They searched everywhere.
464
00:16:37,313 --> 00:16:39,713
I put it in the bone
the dog ran off with.
465
00:16:39,749 --> 00:16:42,015
I told you he was a smart dog.
466
00:16:42,051 --> 00:16:43,517
Colonel, do you think
467
00:16:43,553 --> 00:16:45,252
that Swiss Commission...
468
00:16:45,287 --> 00:16:47,120
I do... Rumpelstiltskin
is one of them.
469
00:16:47,156 --> 00:16:48,221
It all fits perfectly.
470
00:16:48,257 --> 00:16:49,957
Hey, speaking of
the dog, where is he?
471
00:16:51,193 --> 00:16:52,193
There he is.
472
00:16:53,546 --> 00:16:54,978
LeBEAU: There's my little baby.
473
00:16:55,014 --> 00:16:56,763
Where's the bone?
474
00:16:56,799 --> 00:16:57,976
I'll send him to find it.
475
00:16:58,000 --> 00:16:58,966
Okay...
476
00:16:59,001 --> 00:17:01,161
show us where you hid the bone.
477
00:17:02,505 --> 00:17:05,439
Go on, baby, we'll
give the bone back.
478
00:17:05,475 --> 00:17:07,891
Come on, show us.
479
00:17:07,927 --> 00:17:09,460
Maybe if we gave
him another bone,
480
00:17:09,496 --> 00:17:10,895
he'd take it to the same place.
481
00:17:10,930 --> 00:17:11,996
Good idea.
482
00:17:14,751 --> 00:17:16,617
Here you are, baby, take it.
483
00:17:18,071 --> 00:17:19,886
That's a good boy.
484
00:17:35,055 --> 00:17:36,165
Hey, hey, come on, come on.
485
00:17:36,189 --> 00:17:37,155
Right here.
486
00:17:37,190 --> 00:17:38,556
Huh? Huh?
487
00:17:51,420 --> 00:17:53,420
Hey, hey, hey. Huh?
488
00:17:53,456 --> 00:17:55,089
Not this one.
489
00:17:55,124 --> 00:17:56,902
The one you took from me before.
490
00:17:56,926 --> 00:17:59,159
The one I gave you
back in the barracks.
491
00:17:59,195 --> 00:18:00,439
You can trust us.
492
00:18:00,463 --> 00:18:02,341
Please show us where it is.
493
00:18:05,050 --> 00:18:07,151
Ah, welcome to Stalag 13.
494
00:18:07,186 --> 00:18:09,453
This is indeed a great
pleasure, a privilege...
495
00:18:09,489 --> 00:18:11,655
This is Colonel Klink.
496
00:18:11,690 --> 00:18:12,789
Herr Kommandant,
497
00:18:12,825 --> 00:18:13,790
Herr Kraft.
498
00:18:13,826 --> 00:18:14,836
Herr Kraft.
499
00:18:14,860 --> 00:18:15,826
Monsieur Bonner.
500
00:18:15,861 --> 00:18:16,827
Monsieur Bonner.
501
00:18:16,862 --> 00:18:18,762
Of the Swiss Prison Commission.
502
00:18:18,797 --> 00:18:20,731
And Hanna Vogel,
503
00:18:20,766 --> 00:18:23,100
deputy leader of the
Nazi Youth Group.
504
00:18:23,136 --> 00:18:27,088
She's escorting them to
the different prison camps.
505
00:18:27,123 --> 00:18:28,823
If I had known that
you were coming here,
506
00:18:28,858 --> 00:18:30,958
I would have prepared this camp.
507
00:18:30,993 --> 00:18:33,026
Of course, you
see it as it really is.
508
00:18:33,062 --> 00:18:35,712
Klink, they know I
called you yesterday
509
00:18:35,748 --> 00:18:36,897
to say they were coming.
510
00:18:36,933 --> 00:18:38,032
Oh.
511
00:18:38,067 --> 00:18:40,367
It, uh, must have
slipped my mind.
512
00:18:40,403 --> 00:18:41,446
I think it is criminal
513
00:18:41,470 --> 00:18:43,015
to keep the prisoners in luxury
514
00:18:43,039 --> 00:18:45,339
while our men are
fighting at the front.
515
00:18:45,374 --> 00:18:46,741
I quite agree.
516
00:18:46,776 --> 00:18:48,242
Uh, but, uh, the
laws of humanity
517
00:18:48,277 --> 00:18:49,760
must always be
observed, of course.
518
00:18:49,795 --> 00:18:52,697
The prisoners, they
get enough to eat?
519
00:18:52,732 --> 00:18:54,982
Oh, indeed they do.
520
00:18:55,017 --> 00:18:57,017
As a matter of fact, they
eat the same food I do,
521
00:18:57,053 --> 00:19:01,054
and, uh, you can see I
am in tip-top condition.
522
00:19:01,090 --> 00:19:04,408
I eat the same food, too.
523
00:19:04,443 --> 00:19:06,254
Naturally, he eats more.
524
00:19:06,278 --> 00:19:09,313
Do you have any men
in solitary confinement?
525
00:19:09,349 --> 00:19:10,932
Of course not.
526
00:19:10,967 --> 00:19:11,933
To tell you the truth,
527
00:19:11,968 --> 00:19:13,512
I don't even know
where those cells are.
528
00:19:13,536 --> 00:19:14,629
That's how much we use them.
529
00:19:14,653 --> 00:19:19,273
Gentlemen, I know
you are short of time.
530
00:19:19,308 --> 00:19:21,575
Suppose we start the inspection.
531
00:19:21,611 --> 00:19:24,695
Follow me.
532
00:19:24,730 --> 00:19:27,793
Well, looks like we've had it...
533
00:19:27,817 --> 00:19:29,261
He's going to sleep for a week.
534
00:19:29,285 --> 00:19:32,520
And he calls himself
"Man's Best Friend."
535
00:19:32,555 --> 00:19:33,954
They finished the inspection.
536
00:19:33,989 --> 00:19:35,790
They're heading back
to Klink's quarters.
537
00:19:35,825 --> 00:19:37,157
Well, that does it.
538
00:19:37,192 --> 00:19:39,493
Better get over and
tell Rumpelstiltskin...
539
00:19:39,529 --> 00:19:40,694
Whoever he is...
540
00:19:40,730 --> 00:19:41,862
We don't have the film.
541
00:19:41,898 --> 00:19:44,948
Break it to him gently, Colonel.
542
00:19:44,983 --> 00:19:46,617
Merci.
543
00:19:46,653 --> 00:19:49,286
Everything seems to be in order.
544
00:19:49,321 --> 00:19:50,699
Yes, from what I've seen,
545
00:19:50,723 --> 00:19:51,967
I have no complaints.
546
00:19:51,991 --> 00:19:52,957
Gentlemen...
547
00:19:52,992 --> 00:19:54,670
I try to make my prison
548
00:19:54,694 --> 00:19:56,488
as homelike as possible.
549
00:19:56,512 --> 00:20:01,148
I often ask myself, "What
would I want if I were a prisoner?"
550
00:20:01,183 --> 00:20:02,984
And then I answer myself.
551
00:20:03,019 --> 00:20:04,251
I say, "Klink"...
552
00:20:04,286 --> 00:20:05,535
That's my name, "Klink."
553
00:20:05,571 --> 00:20:06,665
I say...
554
00:20:06,689 --> 00:20:08,622
That's enough, Klink.
555
00:20:09,992 --> 00:20:14,244
But I am not satisfied.
556
00:20:14,280 --> 00:20:15,746
Believe me...
557
00:20:15,782 --> 00:20:19,116
the Führer is going to hear
how soft they have it here.
558
00:20:19,151 --> 00:20:20,534
How they even have showers.
559
00:20:20,569 --> 00:20:22,486
Cold showers.
560
00:20:22,521 --> 00:20:26,057
Ooh... there is one
thing we didn't do.
561
00:20:26,092 --> 00:20:28,175
We are supposed to
interview a prisoner.
562
00:20:28,210 --> 00:20:29,176
Certainly.
563
00:20:29,211 --> 00:20:30,555
Schultz, go to Barracks G and...
564
00:20:31,580 --> 00:20:33,614
Hogan?
565
00:20:33,649 --> 00:20:35,894
Very sorry, sir, I didn't
realize you're entertaining.
566
00:20:35,918 --> 00:20:36,883
Out, dismissed.
567
00:20:36,919 --> 00:20:39,537
No, no, wait, Colonel Klink.
568
00:20:39,572 --> 00:20:41,672
We will talk to this prisoner.
569
00:20:41,707 --> 00:20:43,608
Colonel Hogan?
570
00:20:43,643 --> 00:20:45,454
Oh, sir, I have a much
better man for you.
571
00:20:45,478 --> 00:20:46,855
Very intelligent,
let me get him.
572
00:20:46,879 --> 00:20:47,889
Schultz, please.
573
00:20:47,913 --> 00:20:48,879
No.
574
00:20:48,914 --> 00:20:50,380
This man will do.
575
00:20:50,416 --> 00:20:52,065
He is supposed to
be picked at random.
576
00:20:52,100 --> 00:20:54,479
Of course, but you see,
this man in Barracks G,
577
00:20:54,503 --> 00:20:57,504
oh, you just won't find
anyone more random, sir.
578
00:20:57,539 --> 00:20:58,505
Schultz, please.
579
00:20:58,541 --> 00:21:00,891
Colonel Hogan?
580
00:21:00,927 --> 00:21:04,028
These men are from the
Swiss Prison Commission.
581
00:21:04,063 --> 00:21:05,462
They would like to talk to you.
582
00:21:05,498 --> 00:21:06,675
I'll be happy to tell them
583
00:21:06,699 --> 00:21:07,943
whatever they want to know.
584
00:21:07,967 --> 00:21:10,717
I'm sure Colonel Hogan
has a million things to do.
585
00:21:10,753 --> 00:21:12,631
Let me find someone
who is not so busy.
586
00:21:12,655 --> 00:21:13,737
Schultz, please.
587
00:21:13,772 --> 00:21:16,012
I haven't anything to do.
588
00:21:17,159 --> 00:21:18,437
I'm entirely at your disposal.
589
00:21:18,461 --> 00:21:19,993
Good. Good.
590
00:21:20,028 --> 00:21:24,865
Now, tell me, do you
have any complaints?
591
00:21:24,900 --> 00:21:25,916
Well...
592
00:21:25,952 --> 00:21:27,618
Excuse me, I have a cold.
593
00:21:27,653 --> 00:21:28,785
Rumpelstiltskin!
594
00:21:31,457 --> 00:21:32,901
Standing around
without any clothes on
595
00:21:32,925 --> 00:21:34,069
and I seem to
have caught a cold.
596
00:21:34,093 --> 00:21:36,760
What were you
doing without clothes?
597
00:21:36,796 --> 00:21:38,061
He's a sun worshipper.
598
00:21:38,096 --> 00:21:39,830
He just can't get enough sun.
599
00:21:39,866 --> 00:21:40,998
In this weather?
600
00:21:41,033 --> 00:21:43,283
That's what I said to
him: "In this weather?"
601
00:21:43,318 --> 00:21:44,718
Rumpelstiltskin!
602
00:21:44,754 --> 00:21:47,037
Now, I ask you,
603
00:21:47,072 --> 00:21:49,406
do you have anything
to complain of?
604
00:21:49,441 --> 00:21:50,691
Well, uh...
605
00:21:53,413 --> 00:21:55,107
Actually, I have
nothing to complain of.
606
00:21:55,131 --> 00:21:56,997
You see, gentlemen,
607
00:21:57,033 --> 00:21:58,543
Colonel Hogan is
truly a representative
608
00:21:58,567 --> 00:21:59,750
of our camp as a whole.
609
00:21:59,785 --> 00:22:00,929
Oh, thank you, Colonel Hogan.
610
00:22:00,953 --> 00:22:01,963
Dismissed.
611
00:22:01,987 --> 00:22:03,532
If you gentlemen are through,
612
00:22:03,556 --> 00:22:05,989
will you please sign
the inspection report?
613
00:22:06,024 --> 00:22:07,825
Oh, certainly.
614
00:22:13,466 --> 00:22:14,898
Now you show up.
615
00:22:14,933 --> 00:22:16,933
Colonel Hogan?
616
00:22:21,440 --> 00:22:23,769
You are supposed to
be standing at attention.
617
00:22:23,793 --> 00:22:26,577
Why? Because I'm talking
to one of the "master race"?
618
00:22:26,612 --> 00:22:28,879
I could have you shot
for talking to me like that.
619
00:22:28,914 --> 00:22:30,931
I'll bet you would, too.
620
00:22:30,966 --> 00:22:34,184
Tell me, what's a nice girl like
you doing in a place like this?
621
00:22:35,704 --> 00:22:37,805
I came here...
622
00:22:37,840 --> 00:22:39,173
to meet a friend.
623
00:22:39,208 --> 00:22:40,257
Is that right?
624
00:22:41,461 --> 00:22:42,742
Rumpelstiltskin.
625
00:22:45,414 --> 00:22:47,064
You're Rumpelstiltskin?
626
00:22:47,099 --> 00:22:48,643
Better give me the film
before they come out.
627
00:22:48,667 --> 00:22:49,633
I haven't got it.
628
00:22:49,669 --> 00:22:50,634
Where is it?
629
00:22:50,670 --> 00:22:51,635
Ask this silly dog.
630
00:22:51,671 --> 00:22:53,470
They were searching us and he...
631
00:22:53,506 --> 00:22:54,471
Shh.
632
00:22:54,507 --> 00:22:55,472
Here they come.
633
00:22:55,508 --> 00:22:57,052
Ah, General
Burkhalter, this has been
634
00:22:57,076 --> 00:22:58,209
a most enjoyable visit.
635
00:22:58,244 --> 00:23:00,277
I wish we had more time
to just sit around and...
636
00:23:00,313 --> 00:23:02,112
Good-bye, Klink.
637
00:23:02,147 --> 00:23:03,531
You see?
638
00:23:03,566 --> 00:23:04,531
That is why
639
00:23:04,584 --> 00:23:06,911
we have a rule against dogs.
640
00:23:06,935 --> 00:23:08,134
Naughty, naughty.
641
00:23:08,170 --> 00:23:09,470
I will get rid of that dog
642
00:23:09,505 --> 00:23:10,471
right away, sir.
643
00:23:10,506 --> 00:23:11,472
Schultz?
644
00:23:11,507 --> 00:23:12,890
Jawohl, Herr Kommandant.
645
00:23:12,925 --> 00:23:14,119
Get that dog out of here.
646
00:23:14,143 --> 00:23:17,978
I have a better idea.
647
00:23:18,013 --> 00:23:19,625
Fräulein, do you like dogs?
648
00:23:19,649 --> 00:23:21,582
Why, ja, I do.
649
00:23:21,617 --> 00:23:22,849
Please accept this one
650
00:23:22,885 --> 00:23:26,320
as a gift from the
boys here at Stalag 13.
651
00:23:26,355 --> 00:23:27,799
Uh, here, you may as well
652
00:23:27,823 --> 00:23:29,834
take along his
favorite bone, too.
653
00:23:29,858 --> 00:23:31,903
I'll just put it in
your doggy bag.
654
00:23:31,927 --> 00:23:34,328
Why, uh, thank you very much.
655
00:23:34,363 --> 00:23:36,179
Sergeant Schultz?
656
00:23:36,215 --> 00:23:39,349
Tell the others we
are ready to leave.
657
00:23:39,385 --> 00:23:40,996
After you've had him awhile,
658
00:23:41,020 --> 00:23:43,721
you'll develop a
real affection for him.
659
00:23:43,756 --> 00:23:46,524
What is his name?
660
00:23:46,559 --> 00:23:48,358
"Rumpelstiltskin."
661
00:23:56,319 --> 00:23:57,329
Hogan, I appreciate
662
00:23:57,353 --> 00:23:58,597
that what you told them
663
00:23:58,621 --> 00:23:59,831
helped me get the highest rating
664
00:23:59,855 --> 00:24:00,899
we've ever had in this camp.
665
00:24:00,923 --> 00:24:01,888
But.
666
00:24:01,924 --> 00:24:03,224
But there is still the matter
667
00:24:03,259 --> 00:24:04,958
of the missing film
from the camera,
668
00:24:04,993 --> 00:24:07,328
and I'm going to report
that to General Burkhalter.
669
00:24:07,363 --> 00:24:08,507
When Burkhalter finds out
670
00:24:08,531 --> 00:24:09,741
you think there was a film
671
00:24:09,765 --> 00:24:10,875
and you haven't got it,
672
00:24:10,899 --> 00:24:12,877
you're really going
to be in big trouble...
673
00:24:12,901 --> 00:24:14,680
Whether there
is any film or not.
674
00:24:14,704 --> 00:24:16,615
So far, it's only in your mind.
675
00:24:16,639 --> 00:24:19,106
Do you want to put it in his?
676
00:24:19,141 --> 00:24:20,974
If only I could be sure.
677
00:24:21,009 --> 00:24:22,654
Could have saved
yourself a lot of trouble
678
00:24:22,678 --> 00:24:24,089
if you'd just asked
me two questions
679
00:24:24,113 --> 00:24:25,691
which I would have
answered truthfully.
680
00:24:25,715 --> 00:24:27,615
What questions?
681
00:24:27,650 --> 00:24:29,261
Well, if before you
started the search,
682
00:24:29,285 --> 00:24:30,362
you had come to me and said,
683
00:24:30,386 --> 00:24:32,664
"Colonel Hogan, do
you have the film?"
684
00:24:32,688 --> 00:24:34,099
I would have
said, "No, I do not."
685
00:24:34,123 --> 00:24:35,166
And then if you had said,
686
00:24:35,190 --> 00:24:36,535
"Do you know where the film is?"
687
00:24:36,559 --> 00:24:38,870
I would have
said, "No, I do not."
688
00:24:38,894 --> 00:24:40,004
And I give you my word
689
00:24:40,028 --> 00:24:41,773
it would have been the truth.
690
00:24:41,797 --> 00:24:43,029
I believe you.
691
00:24:43,065 --> 00:24:45,031
But there's another question:
692
00:24:45,067 --> 00:24:47,067
"Was there any film?"
693
00:24:47,102 --> 00:24:50,371
Sorry... only answer
two questions at a time.
46973
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