All language subtitles for Spin City S01E18 Dog Day Afternoon_track13_[eng]

First of all,
let me just say,

I completely disagree
with your school's decision
to expel you over this.

But even though
you're a student
at a city university,

neither I nor the mayor

have any jurisdiction
over what ultimately

becomes a question of
your First Amendment
rights.

So I... I urge you
to take it up
at a federal level.

I'm sorry,
we just can't
help you here.

So...

Cold outside, huh?

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

(WIND BLOWS)

Could you describe
him again?

He was naked.

That's it? No height,
weight, hair color?

He was blond.

He was
a natural blond.

Can you believe
the snow out there?

This morning,
I tried to take

my cat out
for a walk, right?

Buttons is pulling
on the leash so hard,

I could hardly get
him from the building.

Okay, let's forget
for a second

that Paul actually
walks his cat.

There's a kernel of relevance
in what he has to say.

The finest weathermen
in the city

say we're gonna get
somewhere between

1 and 125 inches
of snow today.

You know,
if you're in
an avalanche,

you're supposed to
hunch over and create
an air pocket.

Well, that's great,
James.

We're gonna post
that on Fifth Avenue.

Right next to
the tsunami warnings.

Don't worry
about it, James.
If it weren't for you,

I wouldn't know
that if attacked
by a bear,

I should avoid
eye contact.

Oh, yeah,
they get nervous
if you stare.

Okay, we gotta
process these
overtime forms

and get them over
to the Department
of Transportation,

so we can get
the plows out in
the streets in time.

Carter, Stuart,
which one of you
wants to handle this?

He does.
He does.

Congratulations,
we have a tie.

Nikki, you're
in charge
of the TLC.

Oh, that's sweet.

We could use
a little more of
that around here.

That's Taxi and
Limousine Commission,

you dip.

Thank you for
proving my point.

Mike, Building Services
needs your permission

to start
salting the steps.

Tell 'em they got it.

And if there's a fire,
they should feel free
to put that out, too.

Oh, and there's
a young woman coming
upstairs to see you.

Janelle, we're in
the middle of a potential
crisis situation here.

This is priority one
right now.
Nothing else matters.

Great googly moogly!

Hi, Mike.

I suppose we could
take a quick time out.

Shelly McCrory.

I can't believe
I haven't seen you
since high school.

Shelly...

McCrory.

Right again.

I had the...
The biggest...

crush on you
in high school,
and I...

I just never did
anything about it.

Well, if you had
a thing for me,

why did you go out
with Julie MacCallum
senior year?

Because her locker
was next to yours.

And she put out.

Well, guess what, Mike.

Everything you were
thinking about me,

I was thinking the exact
same things about you.

Oh, I doubt it.

Well, it's too bad we never
went out on a date.

Actually, we went
out on lots of them.

You, uh...
You just didn't
know it.

Remember that
homecoming game?

We sat next
to each other
in the bleachers.

Mike, I was
with my boyfriend.

Was that as
uncomfortable for you
as it was for me?

Well, since you're
in town now,

there's no reason
we couldn't
get together.

Well, actually,
I'm just here
for the night.

I, uh... I turned 30
a couple of months ago,

and, uh...
it occurred to me,

my whole life,
it's been nothing

but missed opportunities,
you know?

So, I figured,
what the hell?

And I... I quit
my job, I gave up
my apartment,

and I am
moving to Paris.

My plane leaves
tomorrow morning.

Well, that's exciting.

Just when I had stopped
obsessing about you.

Thanks for dropping by.

Well, you know,
just because I'm...
I'm leaving tomorrow morning,

doesn't mean that
we can't get together...

tonight.

You know,
you're right.
You're right.

(STAMMERS) Listen,
why don't I take
you out to dinner, all right?

Any place you want,
you name it.

I was thinking
room service.

(SNAPS)

I love that place.

Mike, I've come up
with what I think

is a cohesive theme
for our storm broadcast,

Blizzard Watch '97.

That's brilliant.

You should put in
for overtime this week.

James, I need you to
write the mayor's copy.

Just basic stuff, okay?

Keep the avalanche
safety tips
to a minimum.

James?

I'm... I'm sorry, Mike,
I'm just a little nervous.

You know, I haven't spent
a lot of time in here.

I don't want to put
my foot in my mouth.

Don't worry,
you won't.

Who's this drunken
old man with the mayor?

That's his mom.

So, we all
ready in here?

Yes, sir, we are.
This is the command
center for...

(IN DEEP VOICE)
Blizzard Watch '97!

Sorry, sir.

As you can see, sir,
I leave you in
the most capable hands.

Uh-huh.

Now, Mr. Mayor...
Yeah.

...when speaking into
a radio microphone,

I usually like
to keep my lips

just a...
A comfortable distance
from the device.

Really, Paul?

I usually like
to swallow the
microphone whole

and then talk.

(EXHALES)

Hey, there, citizens.

Ooh.

(LOUDER)
Hey, there, citizens.

Hey, there.
(MIMICKING ECHO)
Hey, there. Hey, there.

♪♪ Hey there

♪♪ You with the stars
In your eyes

♪♪ Love never made... ♪♪

Sir. Sir.

What?

Sir, we're live.

And now,
here's the mayor.

Why is this
not working?

I don't suppose
you have change
for a dollar?

Sorry.

What are you
looking at?

Nothing.

Not that
it's nothing.

It's just that,
well...

You must be
very proud.

(SHOUTING)
Damn this thing!

Give me...
Give me your money.
Give me your money.

You know, this
hallway light
is out, too.

Maybe a fuse
is blown.

I'll get you
your Mr. Goodbar or...

I want a Zagnut.

Apparently,
you want
a Mr. Goodbar.

MIKE: You talk
to Human Services

about setting up
extra shelters?
Check.

Suspended alternate
side of the street
parking?

Check. We've taken
care of everything
on your list.

No, not quite
everything.

Put on your mittens.

Yes.

Well, my work
here is done.

Good night,
everybody.

JANELLE: Good night, Mike.

Have fun catching up
with your friend.

All right, do I detect
a note of sarcasm there?

Come on, out with it.
Out with it.

Let's hear what
you have to say.

She's trying to say
you could not be

in more of a hurry
to go have sex.

Well, I never.

I mean, I am shocked.

Claudia, you know me.
Do I seem like

that kind of guy
to you?
Uh...

I just came by
to say hi to Paul.
(CHUCKLING)

Come on, you're
among friends here.
Let's go. Out with it.

Mmm, I think
you're looking to make
a booty call.

Right.

(BOTH LAUGHING)

Stuart, we don't
have time for this.

We have to fax
the overtime authorization

for the snow plow guys.

That'll take five seconds.
What are you talking about?

I don't want to be
down here in this
nasty boiler room

trying to fix a fuse,
because you want
a damn Zagnut.

I still want a Zagnut.

Shut up!

It's got a crispy
nougat center.

Just flip
the switch.

(SIGHS)

I can't get
it open.

Oh, let me.
Move, move.

Go ahead,
you control freak.

This should
be simple.

Here, use this
to pry it open.

Where did
you get this?

STUART: Um...
(DOOR CLOSES)

(SIGHS IN
EXASPERATION)
Under the door.

So cold.

No cabs.

You were
really out there
for an hour?

I don't know.
It seemed
like an hour.

I think
my watch stopped.

And now it's frozen
to my head.

Help me.

Help me.

Careful.

Ahhh!

Why aren't the streets
plowed, Janelle?

(BOTH SCREAMING)

Where the hell
are Stuart and Carter?

We must have
plows, Janelle.

No plows, no streets.
No streets, no cabs.

You want me
to call someone?

That would be nice.

You know,
with that woman
waiting for you,

I'm surprised you didn't
just tunnel your way
to a subway station.

I tried.

I got a couple
of hundred yards,

I couldn't feel
the lower half
of my body.

I figured, you know,

what's the point?

NIKKI: I'm glad
you're here.

A large section
of Brooklyn

just lost power.

Claudia's helping
us with the calls.

Uh, no, I'm sorry.

I don't got
no freaking idea

how long the lights
will be out.

Well, conditions
as they are,

I'm restricting
transportation to
emergency vehicles only.

Hang the sign out, Mike.
New York City is closed.

No, no, sir,
you can't do that!

Give me one
good reason.

The children, sir.

What children?

The children
in all of us.

It's done, Mike.
We're stuck here
for now!

Well, I don't suppose
it could get any worse.

Shelly just called.
She wanted you to know

she's curled up
in front of a big,
cozy fire.

Was that the guy?

I don't know.

I just saw him
from the back.

(WIND WHOOSHING)

(TAPPING IN MORSE CODE)

Morse code.
Brilliant.

Maybe the Coast Guard
will come down and rescue us.

Well, your idea
to crank the heat
up to 150

didn't exactly
bring people
flocking down here.

I can't take
this anymore.
I'm turning it off.

(CLATTERS)

Great! What are you
gonna do now?

(TAPPING IN MORSE CODE)

Cut me some slack!
I'm dying over here.

Well, take off...
Take off the wool suit.

Oh, yeah, right.

Oh, what are you, eight?

I promise
not to watch.

All right, then.

(SIGHS)

(VOCALIZING)

♪♪ Da da da da da da

♪♪ Da da da da da

♪♪ Da da da da da da da da
Boom, boom, boom ♪♪
Will you stop it!

You're making me
uncomfortable!

Whatever it takes
to get you guys
to drive the plows,

I authorize it.

Just saddle up.

Thank you.
Thank you, thank you.

Yes! Ladies and gentlemen,
put on your name tags,

New York City
is open for business.

Whew!

And what
are you doing?

I'm getting
some coffee.

We're snowed in.

What are you gonna do,
throw me out?

Give me a cup
of that, will you?

Cream and sugar?

Yeah, I'll...
I'll stir it myself.

Damn! It is
hot in here!

You know,
some people pay
a lot of money for this.

You know,
I'm totally comfortable.

The human body
is remarkably
self-regulating.

Take a hike,
you nudist crackpot.

I'm going to ahead
and announce the school
closings for tomorrow.

All of them. (LAUGHS)

"So, who's your
favorite mayor,
huh, kids?

"And you high-schoolers,
let's remember that
come election time, huh?"

That's
very funny.

Thank you.
Thank you.

You know...

This storm reminds me
of when I was a boy.

Uh, no,
it doesn't.

It was December,
1955.

(CHUCKLES) I was rushing out
to meet up with my playmates.

(CLICKS TONGUE)
And my mother grabbed me

And told me to shovel
the front walk,

so that the postman
wouldn't slip.

God, I resented her.

Yeah, no, no.
Of course,
I'm still coming.

Yeah, no, listen.
All the emergencies
are taken care of.

It's just
a waiting game now.

Yeah. Oh, hey, you, uh,
forgot your shopping bag.

It's a...
It's a nice scarf.

It's not?

Nikki.

Go!

I'll be there
in 15 minutes.

You have to promise
you'll wear your beeper
at all times.

I'll tie it
to my wrist.

Mike, that's not
your coat.

I don't care.

Hey, I think I hear
my Paulie on the radio.

PAUL: James, I can't
take this anymore.

Thank goodness he
went to the bathroom.

The mayor and his
stories! Sheesh!

The man could bore his
way through sheetrock.

JAMES: Paul,
we're still on the air.

PAUL: Oh, no.

No.

Bummer for Paulie.

Mike, you can't
leave. You gotta
help him!

This job
is Paul's life.

It's everything to him.
If he loses it,

he'll be stripped
of his pride,
his dignity.

Mike, he'll be a broken,
empty, hollowed out
shell of a man!

Claudia.

That's a worst-case scenario.

(SIGHING)

(SIGHS)

Ahhh!
Congratulations,
Stuart.

You've done it.

You are now officially
the worst guy ever

to be stuck
in a room with.

Ha! Meet my parents!

No, thanks.
I've already
met my own.

A little family tension
from the most sensitive
man on the planet?

Oh, it's mostly my dad.

Wait a minute.

Are we relating?

We'll deny it later.

Go ahead, talk
about your father.

I'm here for you.

I'll keep trying
to attract attention.

STUART: What is that,
the water pressure?

All right, do me
a favor. Get utilities
on the phone.

Find out what
the hell is going on
with the water pressure.

I flushed a toilet
in the men's room.

I almost got sucked into
the center of the earth.

What are you doing
flushing the toilet
while you're sitting down?

Stay out of my
personal life, okay?

Where the hell
is Paul?

I can't get out
of here till this
thing is settled.

Shelly's flight
leaves in less
than six hours.

Are the airports
still closed?

Runways will
be open by dawn.

All right. Do me a favor.
Call the fire department.
Have them open the hoses

and freeze those
babies back up.

Are you proposing that
we shut down a major
international airport?

Hey, dinner, flowers,
shutting down airports.

Women appreciate
the little gestures.

Well, where
is he, Mike?

I looked
everywhere, sir.

I even put a plate
of Ho-Hos in front
of the air duct.

Oh.

I think he's gone AWOL.

Oh, out there
in the bitter cold...
(SHIVERS)

Let's hope he
forgot his jacket.

Sir, you're angry,
you have every
reason to be, but...

Look, it's late,
we're all tired.
MAYOR: Mmm-hmm.

The sooner
we get past this,

the sooner we can
finish up and go home.

Plus, Mike,
aren't you meeting
that girl tonight?

We're focusing
on the mayor
right now, James.

Paul?

Honey, it's Claudia.

PAUL: Shh. I'm hiding.

Ooh, are we playing
our little game?

PAUL: This is no game.

The mayor's got it
out for me.

Paul, I heard what
you said on the radio,

and it's not as bad
as you think.

Now, you should
just go find the mayor
and apologize.

No one ever solved
anything by hiding.

The Von Trapps did.

Honey, that
was a musical.

Based on a true story.

Paul, please, for me.

Okay, all right, but...

Does this mean that
we've reached that stage
in our relationship

where I have to do
whatever you ask?

Honey, we got
to that stage

the second I agreed
to go out with you.

Paul? (GASPS)

Sorry. I didn't
realize anybody was, um,

naked in here.

Stay. I'm just
reading the paper.

Here. Sports page?

No, no. You go ahead
and wear that.

Listen, I am not one
of those '70s hipsters

who's trying to act out
some exhibitionist fantasy.

So then it's laundry day?

Think about
the power of nudity.

No fashion,
no shopping malls,
no supermodels.

Ridding the world
of supermodels,
I could get on that bus.

No shame about your body,
no sexual hang-ups.

No guys asking you out
just 'cause they want
to see you naked.

Are you with me?
I am!

We've been
oppressed too long!
Yes, we have!

Take your clothes off.
Not a chance.

Sir, you're on
in 30 seconds.
Okay.

Sir, this is Paulie
we're talking about.
MAYOR: Hmm.

Should it have
happened? No.

Could it
happen again?

You betcha.

(SOFTLY) Mr. Mayor?

Mr. Mayor, there
is nothing I could say
to undo what I said,

so I just want
to say that
I said it,

I'm sorry.

Work on that
a long time, did you?

It may not be poetry,
sir, but it is from
the heart.

"Good morning, citizens.

"Oh, good news.
Power has been restored

"to all affected areas
of Brooklyn,

"and the subways
will be up and running

"by morning rush hour."

Now, earlier,
most of you probably
heard some comments

made by my
press secretary,
Paul Lassiter.

Well, I'd like to take
this opportunity

to assure you
that I...

took no offense.

Good night,
New York.

In fact, Paulie is...
He's with me
right here now.

Say hi,
to the folks, Paul.

(WHISPERING) Hi.

This is radio,
Lassiter.

Oh, I'm sorry.

Hello, everybody.
Yes, come on,
sit down.

God knows we kid
each other around
the office, huh, Paul?

We do?
Yeah. (LAUGHING)

Sure. Why, I can
hardly count the
number of times

that you've stuck
your foot in your mouth
up on that podium.

(LAUGHS)
It's a thousand
if it's one, sir.

Yeah.

And I'm sure
we can both admit

that I do sometimes
get a little
long-winded myself.

A little? I could
strap you onto
a balloon

and fly around
the world!
(LAUGHING)

I should go
hide now.

Well, will you
look at this.

(WHISPERING)
Water!

(HOARSELY) Is it really true?

Are we finally free?

(TELEPHONE RINGING)

Yeah?

Yeah, I was right.
They're down here.

You sure I can't
see him just
for a minute?

I'm sorry. No.

You see, I caused
him a lot of trouble
last night.

He was so tired,
he fell asleep
at his desk.

Now he is asleep,
he's gonna stay asleep,

and that's the end,
okay?

But, I just really...
(STAMMERS)

No buts. No buts.

Now, you just
go off to Paris,
okay?

I hear it's beautiful
this time of year.

Okay, just do me
a favor and give
him a kiss for me.

Oh, yeah, okay.

Yes, that is exactly
what I am going to do.

Of course. Yeah. Will do.

Good night, buddy.