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1
-1:59:53,804 --> -1:59:57,038
CBS presents this
program in color.
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00:00:48,108 --> 00:00:51,093
♪ ♪
3
00:01:23,144 --> 00:01:24,110
Newkirk's away, Colonel.
4
00:01:24,145 --> 00:01:25,722
All right, good.
LeBeau, you're next.
5
00:01:25,746 --> 00:01:27,958
Three minutes, then
Carter, Kinch; I'll be last out.
6
00:01:27,982 --> 00:01:29,926
Okay. Now, look,
stay on schedule.
7
00:01:29,950 --> 00:01:32,296
Wait until we're all assembled
at the rendezvous point.
8
00:01:32,320 --> 00:01:33,952
This one has got to work.
9
00:01:33,988 --> 00:01:35,482
You're a little
jumpy, mon colonel.
10
00:01:35,506 --> 00:01:37,039
This is important.
11
00:01:37,075 --> 00:01:38,718
That Kraut officer's
carrying plans
12
00:01:38,742 --> 00:01:41,238
for the German coastal
defense for the channel ports.
13
00:01:41,262 --> 00:01:43,362
Oh, yeah, big stuff. Now, look,
14
00:01:43,397 --> 00:01:45,409
the underground
has assigned a girl.
15
00:01:45,433 --> 00:01:47,066
Her name is Christina.
16
00:01:47,101 --> 00:01:49,079
She's going to
stop the Kraut's car.
17
00:01:49,103 --> 00:01:50,735
A girl to stop a car?
18
00:01:50,771 --> 00:01:52,070
It's been done before.
19
00:01:52,105 --> 00:01:53,705
She wouldn't have
any trouble with me.
20
00:01:53,740 --> 00:01:55,185
You don't even know
what she looks like.
21
00:01:55,209 --> 00:01:57,137
After two years in
here, who cares?
22
00:01:57,161 --> 00:01:58,161
LeBeau.
23
00:02:03,167 --> 00:02:04,566
All right, stand by.
24
00:02:04,602 --> 00:02:06,413
Kinch, you'll handle the camera.
25
00:02:06,437 --> 00:02:08,749
Right. Bring the film
back and get it developed.
26
00:02:08,773 --> 00:02:11,406
London wants the negatives
delivered to a local contact.
27
00:02:11,442 --> 00:02:12,753
His name is Carl. Right.
28
00:02:12,777 --> 00:02:13,759
Any questions?
29
00:02:13,794 --> 00:02:16,261
Colonel, we're all
going to be out of camp.
30
00:02:16,296 --> 00:02:18,274
Now, what happens if
Schultz or Klink decide
31
00:02:18,298 --> 00:02:20,060
to make a surprise
bed check tonight?
32
00:02:20,084 --> 00:02:22,564
Impossible. I locked
the barracks door.
33
00:02:23,303 --> 00:02:25,103
I know there's a war on,
34
00:02:25,138 --> 00:02:27,740
but we're entitled
to some privacy.
35
00:03:16,540 --> 00:03:19,041
Franz.
36
00:03:20,377 --> 00:03:23,045
Franz?
37
00:03:28,568 --> 00:03:30,469
Was ist los?
38
00:04:10,210 --> 00:04:12,528
Madame Fraulein, trouble?
39
00:04:12,563 --> 00:04:13,679
Afraid so.
40
00:04:13,714 --> 00:04:17,016
I started to turn around,
and the engine went dead.
41
00:04:17,051 --> 00:04:19,051
Sorry I have blocked the road.
42
00:04:19,086 --> 00:04:20,486
We'll see what we can do.
43
00:04:20,521 --> 00:04:22,841
Baggert, have a look at it.
44
00:04:23,640 --> 00:04:25,785
Would you care
to wait in my car?
45
00:04:25,809 --> 00:04:29,144
Danke, Major. That
is very kind of you.
46
00:04:30,147 --> 00:04:32,359
You know, there is a café
47
00:04:32,383 --> 00:04:33,626
just down the road.
48
00:04:33,650 --> 00:04:35,284
Excellent idea.
49
00:04:35,319 --> 00:04:37,130
We might as well be comfortable,
50
00:04:37,154 --> 00:04:39,488
and I am ready for a drink.
51
00:04:42,493 --> 00:04:44,826
Carry on, Baggert.
52
00:04:54,021 --> 00:04:56,821
Madame Fraulein, Herr Major.
53
00:04:56,857 --> 00:04:57,822
Madame, this way, please.
54
00:04:57,858 --> 00:05:00,058
I think I have a table for you.
55
00:05:00,093 --> 00:05:02,528
Ah. Danke.
56
00:05:04,031 --> 00:05:05,664
Allow me.
57
00:05:05,699 --> 00:05:06,998
Would you care to order?
58
00:05:07,034 --> 00:05:08,500
Uh, cognac, bitte.
59
00:05:08,536 --> 00:05:10,669
Sir? Eins Schnaps for me.
60
00:05:10,704 --> 00:05:13,505
Eins cognac and
eins Schnaps, bitte.
61
00:05:13,541 --> 00:05:15,519
Would you like me to
hang your coat up, sir?
62
00:05:15,543 --> 00:05:18,277
No. Uh, I will
keep it right here.
63
00:05:18,312 --> 00:05:19,778
Yes.
64
00:05:19,813 --> 00:05:22,214
I'll get your drinks right away.
65
00:05:24,201 --> 00:05:26,434
Must be in his overcoat.
66
00:05:26,470 --> 00:05:28,603
He didn't seem to care
about the briefcase.
67
00:05:28,639 --> 00:05:32,775
Eins mal cognac...
68
00:05:32,810 --> 00:05:35,443
und eins mal Schnaps.
69
00:05:35,479 --> 00:05:38,113
A vache lot of good it does us.
70
00:05:38,149 --> 00:05:40,127
Everything's going to be okay.
71
00:05:40,151 --> 00:05:42,671
The Marines have landed.
72
00:05:43,987 --> 00:05:47,507
Guten Abend, Captain.
73
00:05:49,660 --> 00:05:51,638
Eins cognac. Danke.
74
00:05:51,662 --> 00:05:53,962
Eins Schnaps. Danke.
75
00:05:53,997 --> 00:05:55,331
Bitte.
76
00:05:56,334 --> 00:05:57,966
Karl?
77
00:05:58,001 --> 00:05:59,479
Aren't you Major Grunnel?
78
00:05:59,503 --> 00:06:01,470
Afraid not. Uh,
my name is Klantz.
79
00:06:01,505 --> 00:06:03,972
You look enough like Major
Grunnel to be his twin brother.
80
00:06:04,007 --> 00:06:05,140
Forgive me, sir.
81
00:06:05,175 --> 00:06:06,986
Perhaps the captain
would like to join us?
82
00:06:07,010 --> 00:06:08,644
Oh, I would be intruding.
83
00:06:08,679 --> 00:06:11,647
No intrusion, Captain.
Uh, join us, by all means.
84
00:06:11,682 --> 00:06:13,649
Danke. Uh, Captain Hoganlaffer.
85
00:06:13,684 --> 00:06:16,819
Well, you know my name,
and this is Fraulein Etst.
86
00:06:16,854 --> 00:06:18,587
Fraulein. Captain, may I?
87
00:06:18,622 --> 00:06:19,755
Ah, danke.
88
00:06:19,790 --> 00:06:22,023
Uh, would you like me to,
uh, hang your coat up, sir?
89
00:06:22,059 --> 00:06:23,470
Please do, and
bring me some beer.
90
00:06:23,494 --> 00:06:25,160
Right away, sir.
91
00:06:27,297 --> 00:06:29,330
Eins beer, Rudolph.
92
00:06:29,366 --> 00:06:32,735
Eins beer... Rudolph?
93
00:06:58,295 --> 00:06:59,605
And with a little champagne
94
00:06:59,629 --> 00:07:01,474
I was able to get
on the black market,
95
00:07:01,498 --> 00:07:04,632
the trip should not be too dull.
96
00:07:04,668 --> 00:07:06,634
Now, uh, what about
another cognac?
97
00:07:06,670 --> 00:07:08,136
Ja, I think I will.
98
00:07:08,172 --> 00:07:09,137
Captain?
99
00:07:09,173 --> 00:07:10,638
Oh, no, it's past my bedtime.
100
00:07:10,674 --> 00:07:11,974
Waiter, my coat, please.
101
00:07:12,009 --> 00:07:13,308
Jawohl, Herr Captain.
102
00:07:13,344 --> 00:07:16,644
Well... Major.
103
00:07:16,680 --> 00:07:18,247
Captain.
104
00:07:18,282 --> 00:07:20,249
Fraulein.
105
00:07:20,284 --> 00:07:21,917
It's been most pleasant.
106
00:07:21,952 --> 00:07:23,096
Danke, Captain.
107
00:07:23,120 --> 00:07:25,420
I don't know when I've
gotten more out of an evening.
108
00:07:25,455 --> 00:07:26,421
My pleasure, Captain.
109
00:07:26,456 --> 00:07:28,257
Yes. Heil Hitler.
110
00:07:28,292 --> 00:07:29,936
Heil Hitler. Auf Wiedersehen.
111
00:07:29,960 --> 00:07:31,104
Auf Wiedersehen.
112
00:07:31,128 --> 00:07:33,929
Waiter, eins mal, bitte.
113
00:07:33,964 --> 00:07:36,431
Jawohl. Danke.
114
00:07:36,466 --> 00:07:38,466
Eins mal, bitte, Rudolph.
115
00:07:43,006 --> 00:07:43,988
Come in.
116
00:07:44,024 --> 00:07:46,775
Commandant, you
wanted to see me?
117
00:07:46,810 --> 00:07:48,610
Yes, Hogan, I have
a very serious matter
118
00:07:48,645 --> 00:07:49,611
to discuss with you.
119
00:07:49,646 --> 00:07:50,790
At your service, Colonel.
120
00:07:50,814 --> 00:07:52,764
I know everything that
happened last night.
121
00:07:52,800 --> 00:07:53,582
You what?
122
00:07:53,617 --> 00:07:54,599
I know all about it,
123
00:07:54,634 --> 00:07:55,967
every move that was made.
124
00:07:56,003 --> 00:07:57,897
Hogan, you don't
fool me for one minute.
125
00:07:57,921 --> 00:07:59,204
How did you find out?
126
00:07:59,240 --> 00:08:02,057
General Burkhalter just
telephoned the news from Berlin.
127
00:08:02,092 --> 00:08:03,308
He knows, too?
128
00:08:03,343 --> 00:08:04,592
Of course!
129
00:08:04,628 --> 00:08:07,012
Now, Hogan, there were two
attempted escapes last night:
130
00:08:07,047 --> 00:08:09,025
one from Stalag Nine,
one from Stalag Five,
131
00:08:09,049 --> 00:08:10,399
almost at the same hour.
132
00:08:10,434 --> 00:08:11,750
Phew!
133
00:08:11,785 --> 00:08:13,418
That's wonderful news.
134
00:08:13,453 --> 00:08:16,421
Now don't tell me you
didn't know anything about it.
135
00:08:16,456 --> 00:08:18,590
Well, sir, I... Hogan,
136
00:08:18,625 --> 00:08:20,909
you can't hide a thing from me.
137
00:08:20,944 --> 00:08:23,061
That's very true, sir.
138
00:08:23,096 --> 00:08:25,980
Now, General Burkhalter
feels, and I agree...
139
00:08:26,016 --> 00:08:29,418
Naturally. that this may
be part of a master plan
140
00:08:29,453 --> 00:08:32,004
in which allied prisoners
in all the Stalags
141
00:08:32,039 --> 00:08:34,350
at the same time
attempt an escape,
142
00:08:34,374 --> 00:08:37,342
creating confusion and
tying down German forces
143
00:08:37,377 --> 00:08:38,872
that may be
needed for the front.
144
00:08:38,896 --> 00:08:41,129
That's a great idea.
Mind if I borrow it?
145
00:08:41,164 --> 00:08:44,360
That is exactly why I've
ordered special security forces.
146
00:08:44,384 --> 00:08:47,530
Now, all guards inside
the camp will be doubled,
147
00:08:47,554 --> 00:08:49,832
and a strong patrol will
be placed outside the camp.
148
00:08:49,856 --> 00:08:52,090
That's against the Geneva
Prisoner of War Convention.
149
00:08:52,126 --> 00:08:54,537
I must protest. Your
protest has been noted.
150
00:08:54,561 --> 00:08:58,030
Now, I understand
that General Burkhalter
151
00:08:58,065 --> 00:09:00,032
will make a surprise
visit to investigate
152
00:09:00,067 --> 00:09:02,200
my new special security forces,
153
00:09:02,236 --> 00:09:04,369
and when he
does, I shall be able
154
00:09:04,405 --> 00:09:06,154
to give him a perfect report.
155
00:09:06,189 --> 00:09:07,405
And I'll have to report this
156
00:09:07,440 --> 00:09:09,569
to the Swiss Protecting
Power when they come here.
157
00:09:09,593 --> 00:09:12,194
By all means, but I warn you,
158
00:09:12,229 --> 00:09:16,198
any attempt at an escape
will be crushed without mercy.
159
00:09:16,233 --> 00:09:19,301
From now on, every
soldier under my command
160
00:09:19,336 --> 00:09:20,964
will have to work
an extra shift.
161
00:09:20,988 --> 00:09:22,832
How are they going to
feel about that in Berlin?
162
00:09:22,856 --> 00:09:24,639
What do you mean?
163
00:09:24,674 --> 00:09:26,594
That runs into
a lot of overtime.
164
00:09:35,702 --> 00:09:37,101
All there.
165
00:09:37,137 --> 00:09:38,881
Now you go out through
the emergency tunnel.
166
00:09:38,905 --> 00:09:40,216
You meet Carl,
give him the film.
167
00:09:40,240 --> 00:09:41,451
He'll pass it along to London.
168
00:09:41,475 --> 00:09:42,440
Oui, Colonel.
169
00:09:42,475 --> 00:09:43,308
There he is.
170
00:09:43,344 --> 00:09:44,537
All right, keep an
eye on him, Kinch.
171
00:09:44,561 --> 00:09:46,060
What's the recognition
code, Colonel?
172
00:09:46,096 --> 00:09:47,496
Three first names.
173
00:09:47,531 --> 00:09:50,832
Now, use Harry,
George, Joe, any names.
174
00:09:50,868 --> 00:09:52,679
He must answer
yes to all of them.
175
00:09:52,703 --> 00:09:54,213
Then use the name Carl.
176
00:09:54,237 --> 00:09:56,516
He must answer no. Got it?
177
00:09:56,540 --> 00:09:57,950
Right. On your
way and good luck.
178
00:09:57,974 --> 00:10:00,186
- Thank you.
- Hey, hold it.
179
00:10:00,210 --> 00:10:01,254
Uh-uh.
180
00:10:01,278 --> 00:10:02,427
Trouble.
181
00:10:02,462 --> 00:10:04,428
Real trouble, Colonel.
182
00:10:04,464 --> 00:10:05,744
Take a look.
183
00:10:07,100 --> 00:10:09,651
The Kraut's got him!
184
00:10:09,686 --> 00:10:10,652
What?!
185
00:10:10,687 --> 00:10:11,831
I thought Klink was bluffing
186
00:10:11,855 --> 00:10:12,998
about those patrols.
187
00:10:13,022 --> 00:10:14,155
Let's spring him, Colonel.
188
00:10:14,190 --> 00:10:15,501
Sure, before they take him away.
189
00:10:15,525 --> 00:10:16,569
Take it easy, take it easy.
190
00:10:16,593 --> 00:10:17,804
Nothing's going
to happen to him.
191
00:10:17,828 --> 00:10:19,805
He's a local man. They
have no evidence on him.
192
00:10:19,829 --> 00:10:21,357
They'll question
him and let him go.
193
00:10:21,381 --> 00:10:24,232
And we get the film
to him tomorrow night.
194
00:10:24,267 --> 00:10:25,634
That's the problem.
195
00:10:25,669 --> 00:10:27,079
The Krauts have Carl tagged now.
196
00:10:27,103 --> 00:10:28,069
They'll keep an eye on him.
197
00:10:28,104 --> 00:10:29,148
He's useless to us.
198
00:10:29,172 --> 00:10:30,672
Then what about this?
199
00:10:30,707 --> 00:10:33,953
The alternate plan is to
get this film to Christina.
200
00:10:33,977 --> 00:10:36,856
She knows the next link
in the chain to London.
201
00:10:36,880 --> 00:10:38,625
We'll contact her in town.
202
00:10:38,649 --> 00:10:40,649
Klink's got it sewn up
tight. We can't get out.
203
00:10:40,684 --> 00:10:43,062
Right. Tomorrow, I go to
work on old blood and guts
204
00:10:43,086 --> 00:10:44,931
and make him pull those
patrols out of the woods.
205
00:10:44,955 --> 00:10:45,921
How, Colonel?
206
00:10:45,956 --> 00:10:47,255
I'll tell you how.
207
00:10:47,290 --> 00:10:50,002
I turn into a rat fink
and squeal on you guys.
208
00:10:50,026 --> 00:10:51,593
That's how.
209
00:10:53,296 --> 00:10:54,429
The way I get it,
210
00:10:54,465 --> 00:10:56,097
one of my men
would sacrifice himself
211
00:10:56,132 --> 00:10:57,398
by going over the wire here.
212
00:10:57,434 --> 00:10:58,912
Over the wire? By what means?
213
00:10:58,936 --> 00:11:00,301
A ladder, grappling hooks.
214
00:11:00,337 --> 00:11:01,536
Uh-huh.
215
00:11:01,572 --> 00:11:02,704
Once outside,
216
00:11:02,739 --> 00:11:04,205
he'd divert the
patrols this way.
217
00:11:04,240 --> 00:11:05,807
He'd also draw off
the tower guards
218
00:11:05,843 --> 00:11:07,408
who would be
firing into the woods.
219
00:11:07,444 --> 00:11:08,793
Uh-huh!
220
00:11:08,828 --> 00:11:11,190
And now comes the
real escape. Right.
221
00:11:11,214 --> 00:11:12,748
They plan on
stealing your staff car.
222
00:11:12,783 --> 00:11:15,049
They'd start the motor by
crossing the ignition wires.
223
00:11:15,085 --> 00:11:17,419
Then they race across here
and crash through the gates.
224
00:11:17,454 --> 00:11:18,737
That's it!
225
00:11:18,772 --> 00:11:20,689
That's very interesting.
226
00:11:20,724 --> 00:11:21,690
Mm-hmm.
227
00:11:21,725 --> 00:11:23,169
Schultz, can you
confirm any of this?
228
00:11:23,193 --> 00:11:24,553
Do you have any indication?
229
00:11:24,577 --> 00:11:27,479
I see nothing. I know nothing.
230
00:11:27,514 --> 00:11:30,448
Hmm. "I know
nothing. I see nothing."
231
00:11:30,483 --> 00:11:31,983
You, too, Herr Kommandant?
232
00:11:34,170 --> 00:11:35,754
They kept it very quiet, sir.
233
00:11:35,789 --> 00:11:36,922
Well, you knew.
234
00:11:36,957 --> 00:11:38,735
Well, the escape committee
must report all their plans
235
00:11:38,759 --> 00:11:40,208
to me for approval.
236
00:11:40,243 --> 00:11:42,722
And here you are...
How do you say...
237
00:11:42,746 --> 00:11:44,524
Squealing on your own men?
238
00:11:44,548 --> 00:11:46,209
Mm-hmm. Why, Hogan, why?
239
00:11:46,233 --> 00:11:48,177
Well, I told them how you
had tightened your security,
240
00:11:48,201 --> 00:11:49,278
but they wouldn't believe me.
241
00:11:49,302 --> 00:11:50,680
I just don't want
anybody to get hurt.
242
00:11:50,704 --> 00:11:54,922
Such a nice man for an officer.
243
00:11:54,958 --> 00:11:56,290
Schultz!
244
00:11:56,326 --> 00:11:57,837
A show of force might
stop them from doing it, sir?
245
00:11:57,861 --> 00:11:58,972
You think so? Yes.
246
00:11:58,996 --> 00:12:00,862
Now, if you were to
pull some of your men
247
00:12:00,898 --> 00:12:03,331
and their gun positions
from out of here
248
00:12:03,366 --> 00:12:05,867
and put them down
inside the wire,
249
00:12:05,903 --> 00:12:08,002
might discourage the
men from even trying.
250
00:12:08,038 --> 00:12:10,033
Hogan, I am very impressed
251
00:12:10,057 --> 00:12:11,022
by your attitude.
252
00:12:11,058 --> 00:12:12,168
You're being very helpful.
253
00:12:12,192 --> 00:12:13,224
Thank you, sir.
254
00:12:13,259 --> 00:12:14,403
As a matter of fact,
255
00:12:14,427 --> 00:12:15,805
I would be even more impressed
256
00:12:15,829 --> 00:12:18,446
if the whole thing
were not a lie!
257
00:12:18,481 --> 00:12:21,082
Lie? Colonel, that hurts!
258
00:12:21,117 --> 00:12:22,595
You come here
with this nonsense,
259
00:12:22,619 --> 00:12:24,230
trying to get me
to redeploy my men
260
00:12:24,254 --> 00:12:25,898
so I would leave
an area unguarded?
261
00:12:25,922 --> 00:12:27,766
Then the real escape
would be attempted
262
00:12:27,790 --> 00:12:29,101
with you leading the pack.
263
00:12:29,125 --> 00:12:30,875
Sir, you're doing
me an injustice.
264
00:12:30,910 --> 00:12:32,488
Huh! Even if this escape
were unsuccessful,
265
00:12:32,512 --> 00:12:33,478
it would embarrass me
266
00:12:33,513 --> 00:12:34,824
in the eyes of
General Burkhalter!
267
00:12:34,848 --> 00:12:37,032
Colonel, just a minute!
268
00:12:37,067 --> 00:12:39,195
I am going to take
your suggestion, Hogan,
269
00:12:39,219 --> 00:12:41,581
only in a slightly
different way.
270
00:12:41,605 --> 00:12:43,899
I am going to order
reinforcements
271
00:12:43,923 --> 00:12:46,274
from divisional
headquarters at once.
272
00:12:46,309 --> 00:12:47,554
That is what I think
273
00:12:47,578 --> 00:12:50,746
of your childish little scheme.
274
00:12:52,783 --> 00:12:56,518
Anytime you care to report
to me again, Colonel Hogan,
275
00:12:56,553 --> 00:12:58,987
I shall be at your disposal.
276
00:13:01,341 --> 00:13:02,957
Colonel Hogan, what happened?
277
00:13:02,992 --> 00:13:06,261
Schultz, I think
I'm losing my touch.
278
00:13:14,721 --> 00:13:17,355
A cigarette for a pal?
279
00:13:17,390 --> 00:13:20,692
The Fuhrer does not share
his cigarettes with anybody,
280
00:13:20,727 --> 00:13:24,763
especially with you,
Newkirk... A filthy Englander!
281
00:13:24,798 --> 00:13:26,909
All I did was ask
him for a cigarette,
282
00:13:26,933 --> 00:13:28,611
and he gives me a
bloody vaudeville.
283
00:13:28,635 --> 00:13:31,247
Hey, I do that pretty
good, if I do say so myself.
284
00:13:31,271 --> 00:13:32,470
And you do.
285
00:13:32,505 --> 00:13:33,883
Well, I used to go to
the news reels a lot.
286
00:13:33,907 --> 00:13:36,074
Hey, you know, I can
also do Bette Davis.
287
00:13:36,109 --> 00:13:37,308
Oh, really?
288
00:13:37,343 --> 00:13:39,144
What a dump.
289
00:13:39,179 --> 00:13:40,757
Oh, it's great.
Exactly like her.
290
00:13:40,781 --> 00:13:42,058
Don't call us, we'll call you.
291
00:13:42,082 --> 00:13:43,581
That was pretty good.
292
00:13:44,584 --> 00:13:46,384
Struck out.
293
00:13:46,419 --> 00:13:47,952
You're kidding.
294
00:13:47,988 --> 00:13:50,171
Had me figured
from the beginning.
295
00:13:50,206 --> 00:13:52,040
Wouldn't take the bait.
296
00:13:52,075 --> 00:13:53,541
Toyed with me.
297
00:13:53,576 --> 00:13:54,993
I can't believe it.
298
00:13:55,028 --> 00:13:56,956
The patrols are
still in the woods?
299
00:13:56,980 --> 00:13:59,397
Worse than that. He's
ordered reinforcements.
300
00:13:59,433 --> 00:14:02,467
Either Klink has smartened
up, or I've lost my touch.
301
00:14:02,502 --> 00:14:04,514
Blimy, old Klink's
really got us boxed in.
302
00:14:04,538 --> 00:14:05,787
Right.
303
00:14:05,822 --> 00:14:08,084
We're sitting here with the
most important piece of film
304
00:14:08,108 --> 00:14:09,173
we've ever handled.
305
00:14:09,209 --> 00:14:11,509
If our side tries
even a probing attack
306
00:14:11,544 --> 00:14:13,689
on the coast of France,
could mean the difference
307
00:14:13,713 --> 00:14:15,880
between living and
dying for a lot of people.
308
00:14:15,916 --> 00:14:19,367
Colonel Hogan,
I will get that film
309
00:14:19,402 --> 00:14:23,004
out of Stalag 13 for you,
because I, Adolf Hitler,
310
00:14:23,039 --> 00:14:25,790
am basically a lovable person!
311
00:14:25,825 --> 00:14:28,193
How can you kid
around at a time like this?!
312
00:14:28,228 --> 00:14:30,623
You know what we're up
against. I just laid it out for you.
313
00:14:30,647 --> 00:14:31,612
Sorry, Colonel.
314
00:14:31,648 --> 00:14:32,780
You should be.
315
00:14:32,816 --> 00:14:34,699
Imitating that nut in Berlin.
316
00:14:34,734 --> 00:14:37,068
It's not all that funny.
317
00:14:39,572 --> 00:14:41,339
Wait a minute.
318
00:14:42,342 --> 00:14:44,542
It's really not all that funny.
319
00:14:45,562 --> 00:14:47,362
Do it again.
320
00:14:47,397 --> 00:14:50,414
Put the comb up
the way you had it.
321
00:14:50,450 --> 00:14:52,400
Sure.
322
00:14:54,071 --> 00:14:56,371
Now, walk like old
scramble-brains...
323
00:14:56,406 --> 00:14:58,423
with your thumb in your buckle.
324
00:15:15,859 --> 00:15:17,859
Just might work.
325
00:15:25,969 --> 00:15:27,747
Mills, Foster and Greenberg:
326
00:15:27,771 --> 00:15:29,582
a colonel, a major
and a brigadier general.
327
00:15:29,606 --> 00:15:31,350
Very good uniforms, LeBeau.
328
00:15:31,374 --> 00:15:32,340
Merci, mon colonel.
329
00:15:32,375 --> 00:15:33,536
All right, this is
330
00:15:33,560 --> 00:15:34,525
a very important
job, so make it work,
331
00:15:34,560 --> 00:15:36,238
and it'll be a big
score for our side.
332
00:15:36,262 --> 00:15:37,829
Only one man should talk.
333
00:15:37,864 --> 00:15:38,947
Who's it going to be?
334
00:15:38,982 --> 00:15:40,181
I'm elected, Colonel.
335
00:15:40,217 --> 00:15:42,078
All right, Foster,
keep it to a minimum,
336
00:15:42,102 --> 00:15:43,912
but very arrogant
and sure of yourself.
337
00:15:43,936 --> 00:15:45,036
Yes, sir!
338
00:15:45,071 --> 00:15:46,916
And stay away from the
guards as much as possible.
339
00:15:46,940 --> 00:15:49,107
We don't want some
nosy Kraut recognizing you.
340
00:15:49,142 --> 00:15:50,369
Gentlemen,
341
00:15:50,393 --> 00:15:53,144
gentlemen, a little
Achtung if you please!
342
00:15:53,180 --> 00:15:56,581
And now, direct from a
successful engagement
343
00:15:56,616 --> 00:15:58,783
in Berlin, where he bombed,
344
00:15:58,818 --> 00:16:02,354
here he is, your enemy and mine,
345
00:16:02,389 --> 00:16:05,690
Heil Jigglegruber!
346
00:16:20,307 --> 00:16:22,040
Carter, it's great.
347
00:16:22,075 --> 00:16:24,342
You look just like
Mr. Nutty himself.
348
00:16:24,378 --> 00:16:25,743
Formidable.
349
00:16:25,778 --> 00:16:27,089
You could fool Eva Braun.
350
00:16:27,113 --> 00:16:28,390
All right, look,
it's almost time.
351
00:16:28,414 --> 00:16:29,681
Here's the setup.
352
00:16:29,716 --> 00:16:31,482
Kinch has got a car
from the motor pool.
353
00:16:31,517 --> 00:16:33,517
You drive along inside the wire
354
00:16:33,553 --> 00:16:35,352
just after they
change the guards.
355
00:16:35,388 --> 00:16:36,966
Now, the Krauts
coming on duty will think
356
00:16:36,990 --> 00:16:39,035
you've already been admitted
to camp through another gate.
357
00:16:39,059 --> 00:16:41,025
You know the rest. Good luck.
358
00:16:41,061 --> 00:16:42,860
Yeah, good luck.
359
00:16:42,896 --> 00:16:44,128
You scared, Carter?
360
00:16:44,164 --> 00:16:45,529
I'm scared.
361
00:16:45,565 --> 00:16:47,531
Doing this bit in
here is one thing,
362
00:16:47,567 --> 00:16:49,767
but outside there
with those killers...
363
00:16:49,802 --> 00:16:50,768
Heil!
364
00:16:50,803 --> 00:16:52,215
Heil!
365
00:16:52,239 --> 00:16:56,074
Why did I have to go
to those news reels?
366
00:17:01,164 --> 00:17:03,464
Changing the guard now, Colonel.
367
00:17:03,499 --> 00:17:06,368
Corporal Schmidt
is posting the men.
368
00:17:06,403 --> 00:17:08,369
There's the car.
369
00:17:09,840 --> 00:17:11,873
Approaching the gate.
370
00:17:12,876 --> 00:17:13,886
Right on time.
371
00:17:13,910 --> 00:17:16,430
Should be over in five
minutes if we're lucky.
372
00:17:18,281 --> 00:17:19,647
It's working!
373
00:17:19,682 --> 00:17:21,916
He's going to Klink's office.
374
00:17:57,954 --> 00:17:59,688
What is this?
375
00:17:59,723 --> 00:18:04,092
I thought I gave the order:
no more barrage balloons.
376
00:18:04,127 --> 00:18:07,195
This is the sergeant of
the guard, Mein Fuhrer.
377
00:18:07,230 --> 00:18:09,030
Sergeant?
378
00:18:09,066 --> 00:18:11,432
I was once a corporal, you know.
379
00:18:11,467 --> 00:18:16,537
I hated sergeants then,
and I hate sergeants now!
380
00:18:16,573 --> 00:18:18,434
Danke, Mein Fuhrer!
381
00:18:18,458 --> 00:18:20,052
What is the meaning of this?
382
00:18:20,076 --> 00:18:21,787
What is this car doing here?
383
00:18:21,811 --> 00:18:24,579
This is against all regulations.
384
00:18:24,614 --> 00:18:25,947
Herr Kommandant, please...
385
00:18:25,982 --> 00:18:27,627
Schultz, who are these officers?
386
00:18:27,651 --> 00:18:28,983
Herr Kommandant, they are...
387
00:18:29,019 --> 00:18:31,218
Oh, shut up!
388
00:18:31,254 --> 00:18:35,122
I am Major Hauptman
of the Fuhrer's staff.
389
00:18:35,158 --> 00:18:36,301
Oh, you are?
390
00:18:36,325 --> 00:18:39,965
And why didn't you
bring the Fuhrer with you?
391
00:18:41,831 --> 00:18:43,831
I'm glad you did.
392
00:18:44,968 --> 00:18:46,851
Heil Hitler.
393
00:18:47,870 --> 00:18:49,515
This man is the commandant?
394
00:18:49,539 --> 00:18:51,122
Jawohl, Mein Fuhrer.
395
00:18:52,258 --> 00:18:54,658
We will the war any minute!
396
00:18:55,996 --> 00:18:58,262
It is indeed a very great honor
397
00:18:58,298 --> 00:19:00,293
to have you here
with us, Mein Fuhrer.
398
00:19:00,317 --> 00:19:03,117
His Excellency was on
his way to Dusseldorf,
399
00:19:03,152 --> 00:19:05,753
and he decided to
make a surprise visit.
400
00:19:05,789 --> 00:19:06,904
Ja!
401
00:19:06,939 --> 00:19:09,140
Everything I do is a surprise,
402
00:19:09,175 --> 00:19:10,958
even to me!
403
00:19:10,994 --> 00:19:13,795
Come on, Carter,
pack up and leave.
404
00:19:13,830 --> 00:19:15,463
Stop gassing with Klink.
405
00:19:15,498 --> 00:19:16,742
Is he balmy?
406
00:19:16,766 --> 00:19:18,444
Every minute out
there is dangerous.
407
00:19:18,468 --> 00:19:20,635
If he starts to sweat, that
mustache will come off.
408
00:19:20,670 --> 00:19:21,914
His orders were to get it over
409
00:19:21,938 --> 00:19:24,171
as quickly as
possible and leave.
410
00:19:25,174 --> 00:19:26,318
Mein Fuhrer,
411
00:19:26,342 --> 00:19:27,586
I had the extreme honor
412
00:19:27,610 --> 00:19:28,988
of being presented to you
413
00:19:29,012 --> 00:19:30,389
at a rally in Munich, uh,
414
00:19:30,413 --> 00:19:31,913
just before the war.
415
00:19:31,948 --> 00:19:33,748
Before the war? Ja, ja.
416
00:19:33,784 --> 00:19:35,616
There was nothing
before the war!
417
00:19:35,652 --> 00:19:37,786
Nobody existed before the war!
418
00:19:37,821 --> 00:19:38,898
Of course not, Mein Fuhrer.
419
00:19:38,922 --> 00:19:39,962
And I will make sure
420
00:19:39,990 --> 00:19:42,290
no one will exist after the war!
421
00:19:42,325 --> 00:19:44,336
Hogan, out of your
barracks at a time like this?
422
00:19:44,360 --> 00:19:45,671
I'm sorry, sir. I heard voices.
423
00:19:45,695 --> 00:19:47,339
Thought maybe you
were having a party.
424
00:19:47,363 --> 00:19:48,707
Back to your quarters at once!
425
00:19:48,731 --> 00:19:51,231
Just a minute. Who
is this Americana?
426
00:19:51,267 --> 00:19:52,277
Colonel Robert Hogan,
427
00:19:52,301 --> 00:19:54,013
Senior Prisoner of War, s-sir.
428
00:19:54,037 --> 00:19:55,163
Colonel Hogan,
429
00:19:55,187 --> 00:19:57,600
may I present Adolf Hitler,
430
00:19:57,624 --> 00:19:59,952
the supreme leader
of our German nation.
431
00:19:59,976 --> 00:20:02,136
How do you do, sir?
I've heard a lot about you.
432
00:20:02,161 --> 00:20:03,706
Back to the barracks, Hogan.
433
00:20:03,730 --> 00:20:05,441
I wish to talk to this man.
434
00:20:05,465 --> 00:20:08,132
Yes, Mein Fuhrer.
435
00:20:09,168 --> 00:20:10,134
Carter, what are you doing,
436
00:20:10,169 --> 00:20:11,969
trying for an Academy Award?
437
00:20:12,004 --> 00:20:14,706
They're watching us; be careful.
438
00:20:14,741 --> 00:20:15,707
Yes, sir.
439
00:20:15,742 --> 00:20:18,243
Your orders were to
get out of camp fast.
440
00:20:18,278 --> 00:20:20,523
Well, I guess I
started imitating Hitler
441
00:20:20,547 --> 00:20:21,846
and I lost my head.
442
00:20:21,881 --> 00:20:24,048
Imitating Hitler and
you lost your head.
443
00:20:24,083 --> 00:20:26,718
I'll guarantee it if
they get wise to us.
444
00:20:26,753 --> 00:20:27,719
Now go back to them
445
00:20:27,754 --> 00:20:29,520
and give orders
to resume your trip.
446
00:20:29,556 --> 00:20:31,122
Get that film out of here.
447
00:20:31,157 --> 00:20:32,123
Yes, sir.
448
00:20:32,158 --> 00:20:33,725
No matter what happens, don't...
449
00:20:33,760 --> 00:20:36,010
Wait a minute... we've blown it.
450
00:20:38,748 --> 00:20:40,248
Burkhalter!
451
00:20:45,588 --> 00:20:47,733
General Burkhalter,
what a surprise.
452
00:20:47,757 --> 00:20:48,723
As a matter of fact,
453
00:20:48,758 --> 00:20:50,436
we are full of
surprises tonight.
454
00:20:50,460 --> 00:20:52,738
The Fuhrer has just arrived.
455
00:20:52,762 --> 00:20:54,295
The Fuhrer, here?
456
00:20:54,331 --> 00:20:56,408
And in a very good mood, sir.
457
00:20:56,432 --> 00:20:58,349
I must greet him at once.
458
00:20:58,384 --> 00:21:01,018
I would have won the
war a long time ago
459
00:21:01,053 --> 00:21:03,754
if it wasn't for my generals!
460
00:21:03,790 --> 00:21:05,684
They are ignorant, stupid fools,
461
00:21:05,708 --> 00:21:07,837
and they know nothing about war!
462
00:21:07,861 --> 00:21:10,461
All they do is eat
and have good times!
463
00:21:10,496 --> 00:21:11,996
Really? Ja!
464
00:21:12,031 --> 00:21:15,631
I have one general who
looks like a stuffed goose!
465
00:21:16,786 --> 00:21:18,064
But, believe me,
466
00:21:18,088 --> 00:21:22,257
one day, the goose will
hang high by his heels!
467
00:21:22,292 --> 00:21:23,502
On second thought,
468
00:21:23,526 --> 00:21:26,060
I will see the Fuhrer
some other time.
469
00:21:26,096 --> 00:21:28,396
But, Herr General, I-I-I...
470
00:21:31,701 --> 00:21:33,234
Ow!
471
00:21:38,808 --> 00:21:40,052
Phew! That was too close.
472
00:21:40,076 --> 00:21:41,042
All right, get going, Carter.
473
00:21:41,077 --> 00:21:42,910
Yes, sir.
474
00:21:46,316 --> 00:21:47,882
Mein Fuhrer...
475
00:21:47,917 --> 00:21:49,645
would you care for
some refreshment?
476
00:21:49,669 --> 00:21:51,435
Nothing. We must go.
477
00:21:51,470 --> 00:21:52,982
We resume our trip at once.
478
00:21:53,006 --> 00:21:55,940
Mein Fuhrer, I cannot tell you
479
00:21:55,975 --> 00:21:56,941
what it has meant to me...
480
00:21:56,976 --> 00:21:58,643
Of course you can't.
481
00:21:58,678 --> 00:22:01,078
Nobody can tell me anything.
482
00:22:01,113 --> 00:22:03,014
I enjoyed myself.
483
00:22:03,049 --> 00:22:04,326
Danke, Mein Fuhrer.
484
00:22:04,350 --> 00:22:06,216
Love your Stalag.
485
00:22:07,987 --> 00:22:10,688
Very nice barbed wire.
486
00:22:10,723 --> 00:22:12,222
We think so.
487
00:22:12,258 --> 00:22:14,158
I like barbed wire.
488
00:22:14,193 --> 00:22:19,329
It makes me feel very
warm, very sentimental inside.
489
00:22:19,365 --> 00:22:21,933
Ja, mein Fuhrer.
490
00:22:21,968 --> 00:22:24,068
Heil! Heil! Heil!
Heil! Heil! Heil!
491
00:22:24,103 --> 00:22:25,936
Yes, yes, by all means.
492
00:22:25,971 --> 00:22:28,172
Auf Wiedersehen, folks.
493
00:22:29,425 --> 00:22:34,111
Heil, heil, heil, heil, heil...
494
00:22:34,147 --> 00:22:37,548
Sig heil! Sig heil!
495
00:22:37,583 --> 00:22:39,995
Heil, heil, Heil, heil...
496
00:22:40,019 --> 00:22:42,097
What a wonderful human being.
497
00:22:42,121 --> 00:22:43,521
What magnetism!
498
00:22:43,556 --> 00:22:45,556
And a great soldier.
499
00:22:45,592 --> 00:22:47,002
Let's not forget
one other thing.
500
00:22:47,026 --> 00:22:48,058
What's that?
501
00:22:48,094 --> 00:22:51,262
He's also a pretty good actor.
502
00:22:54,267 --> 00:22:58,903
♪ Oh, when the soldiers
march through the town, dear ♪
503
00:22:58,938 --> 00:22:59,978
♪ Ba-r-r-um, pom... ♪
504
00:23:02,558 --> 00:23:04,269
Film's on its way
to London, Colonel.
505
00:23:04,293 --> 00:23:05,637
Christina said
she'd take care of it.
506
00:23:05,661 --> 00:23:06,827
Nice work, Adolf.
507
00:23:06,862 --> 00:23:07,895
Yeah.
508
00:23:07,930 --> 00:23:09,674
We-we buried the
clothes in the woods
509
00:23:09,698 --> 00:23:12,011
and the car is parked
on the Hammelburg Road.
510
00:23:12,035 --> 00:23:13,000
Fine.
511
00:23:13,036 --> 00:23:14,063
Now, don't forget your story.
512
00:23:14,087 --> 00:23:15,186
You sneaked out last night
513
00:23:15,221 --> 00:23:16,370
while the Fuhrer was here.
514
00:23:16,406 --> 00:23:17,488
Right.
515
00:23:17,523 --> 00:23:18,673
Achtung!
516
00:23:22,194 --> 00:23:24,662
Now, there is a touching sight.
517
00:23:24,697 --> 00:23:26,797
Your colonel consoling you.
518
00:23:26,832 --> 00:23:28,977
It's no wonder he wins
all the popularity contests.
519
00:23:29,001 --> 00:23:31,835
I have decided on
your punishment:
520
00:23:31,871 --> 00:23:33,203
30 days in the cooler
521
00:23:33,239 --> 00:23:34,938
and all privileges revoked
522
00:23:34,974 --> 00:23:36,707
for an additional 30 days.
523
00:23:36,743 --> 00:23:38,643
That will teach you
to have more faith
524
00:23:38,678 --> 00:23:40,060
in my security measures.
525
00:23:40,096 --> 00:23:43,047
But, sir, we did give ourselves
up to the guards in the woods.
526
00:23:43,082 --> 00:23:45,349
Only after you realized
you couldn't get away.
527
00:23:45,384 --> 00:23:46,350
Sentence stands.
528
00:23:46,385 --> 00:23:47,463
Carter, the commandant is right.
529
00:23:47,487 --> 00:23:48,897
The only thing I can do now
530
00:23:48,921 --> 00:23:50,732
is get in touch
with the Red Cross
531
00:23:50,756 --> 00:23:53,068
and ask them to
deliver a letter to Hitler.
532
00:23:53,092 --> 00:23:54,258
Hitler?
533
00:23:54,293 --> 00:23:56,505
Yeah, he did ask
me to drop him a note.
534
00:23:56,529 --> 00:23:59,263
Simply asked for
clemency in this case.
535
00:23:59,298 --> 00:24:01,365
But you know there's
been an escape attempt,
536
00:24:01,400 --> 00:24:03,800
and he adored our barbed wire.
537
00:24:03,836 --> 00:24:04,980
I know how you feel.
538
00:24:05,004 --> 00:24:06,047
It's too bad, Commandant.
539
00:24:06,071 --> 00:24:07,916
Of course, if you
suspended the sentence,
540
00:24:07,940 --> 00:24:09,418
I'd have nothing to write about.
541
00:24:09,442 --> 00:24:11,842
You could say, "Having
a wonderful time.
542
00:24:11,877 --> 00:24:13,810
Wish you were here."
543
00:24:15,381 --> 00:24:17,548
Very well, sentence suspended.
544
00:24:17,583 --> 00:24:19,066
Schultz, release him.
545
00:24:20,319 --> 00:24:21,485
Dismissed!
546
00:24:30,296 --> 00:24:31,863
Beautiful, Colonel.
547
00:24:31,898 --> 00:24:33,865
You're a happy fella, yeah?
548
00:24:33,900 --> 00:24:34,866
Why shouldn't I be?
549
00:24:34,901 --> 00:24:36,545
I think I've got
the old touch back.
550
00:24:36,569 --> 00:24:37,569
Oh.
551
00:24:38,738 --> 00:24:41,505
He's got his old touch back.
38438
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