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1
00:00:11,315 --> 00:00:12,621
Ah.
2
00:00:15,493 --> 00:00:16,842
That's a sandwich.
3
00:00:19,541 --> 00:00:21,760
Hi, J.T.
Hey, Lilly.
What's up?
4
00:00:21,847 --> 00:00:27,592
I just wanted
you to know
5
00:00:27,679 --> 00:00:28,941
Well, thank you.
6
00:00:29,029 --> 00:00:30,465
And, because
you're my favorite,
7
00:00:30,552 --> 00:00:33,772
you don't have to get me
anything for my birthday.
8
00:00:33,859 --> 00:00:36,775
Aw, come on.
I gotta get you something.
9
00:00:36,862 --> 00:00:40,301
Well, okay.
You can get me a sticker.
10
00:00:40,388 --> 00:00:43,826
'Cause Al's getting me
something really good.
11
00:00:43,913 --> 00:00:46,220
Oh, really?
What's Al getting you?
12
00:00:46,307 --> 00:00:49,005
Barbie's Malibu
Dream House.
13
00:00:51,573 --> 00:00:53,749
Well, if Al's
getting you that,
14
00:00:53,836 --> 00:00:56,099
then, uh, your best brother's
gonna get you
15
00:00:56,186 --> 00:00:58,536
the best birthday present
you've ever seen.
16
00:00:58,623 --> 00:01:00,625
I'm registered
at Toys "R" Us.
17
00:01:02,323 --> 00:01:07,415
On my way.
18
00:01:07,502 --> 00:01:08,459
Yes!
19
00:01:11,984 --> 00:01:13,899
Oh, Karen...
20
00:01:33,354 --> 00:01:37,575
Carol, have you
seen my bathrobe?
21
00:01:37,662 --> 00:01:39,186
The white
terry-cloth one?
22
00:01:39,273 --> 00:01:41,710
Yeah. I can't
find it anywhere.
23
00:01:42,841 --> 00:01:45,453
Morning,
Mr. L, Mrs. L.
24
00:01:45,540 --> 00:01:47,368
Good morning, baby.
25
00:01:47,455 --> 00:01:50,371
Mmm. Man, I love
living right next door.
26
00:01:50,458 --> 00:01:52,068
What do you want
for breakfast,
sweetheart?
27
00:01:52,155 --> 00:01:54,114
Oh, no breakfast
for me, thanks.
I already ate.
28
00:01:55,332 --> 00:01:56,377
Oh, uh, by the way,
29
00:01:56,464 --> 00:01:58,248
you're out of eggs,
bacon, milk,
30
00:01:58,335 --> 00:02:00,772
orange juice, uh,
cottage cheese,
31
00:02:00,859 --> 00:02:04,124
fruit, and, uh,
yeah, potatoes.
32
00:02:05,995 --> 00:02:09,216
Rich,
that's my bathrobe.
33
00:02:09,303 --> 00:02:12,393
Yeah, I know.
It's nice and toasty, too.
34
00:02:12,480 --> 00:02:14,046
Had I seen that one...
35
00:02:16,745 --> 00:02:18,790
Uh, you don't mind that
I borrowed this, do you?
36
00:02:18,877 --> 00:02:20,531
Yes, I do.
Now take it off.
37
00:02:24,100 --> 00:02:25,319
I'd rather not.
38
00:02:25,406 --> 00:02:27,408
I want you
to take it off now.
39
00:02:28,887 --> 00:02:30,802
Okay,
but I'm au naturel.
40
00:02:30,889 --> 00:02:32,152
Oh, jeez.
41
00:02:33,457 --> 00:02:34,980
Keep it on.
42
00:02:35,067 --> 00:02:36,591
When you're done with it,
burn it.
43
00:02:38,897 --> 00:02:40,116
I don't want any
breakfast now, honey.
44
00:02:40,203 --> 00:02:41,422
I'm not hungry.
45
00:02:43,598 --> 00:02:45,904
Oh, by the way, Dana,
I hope you're not
busy on Saturday,
46
00:02:45,991 --> 00:02:47,036
'cause I could really
use some help
47
00:02:47,123 --> 00:02:48,777
with Lilly's
birthday party.
48
00:02:48,864 --> 00:02:50,170
What do you need
help for?
49
00:02:50,257 --> 00:02:51,910
Just let the
little brats
run around,
50
00:02:51,997 --> 00:02:56,088
stuff 'em
full of cake,
51
00:02:56,176 --> 00:02:58,569
Oh, I see. So you think
handling a birthday party
52
00:02:58,656 --> 00:03:01,006
with 16 little
six-year-olds is easy?
53
00:03:01,093 --> 00:03:03,531
Are you kidding?
54
00:03:03,618 --> 00:03:06,577
All you need to do
is let them know
who's the boss.
55
00:03:06,664 --> 00:03:10,451
Oh. Oh, I would like
to see you put your money
where your mouth is.
56
00:03:10,538 --> 00:03:13,541
Fifty bucks says
that you can't run
Lilly's birthday party
57
00:03:13,628 --> 00:03:15,586
without begging for help.
58
00:03:15,673 --> 00:03:20,809
[SCOFFS]
You're on.
59
00:03:20,896 --> 00:03:22,158
I can vouch for that.
60
00:03:24,029 --> 00:03:26,293
I'm usually the one
who does the begging.
61
00:03:28,338 --> 00:03:30,775
You know what?
I don't want
any breakfast either.
62
00:03:37,260 --> 00:03:39,088
[CHEERING ON TV]
Yes!
That's my first win.
63
00:03:39,175 --> 00:03:42,700
Hey, hey. Guys.
Ugh.
64
00:03:42,787 --> 00:03:47,401
Guys, could you
please keep it down?
65
00:03:47,488 --> 00:03:49,794
Let me save you some time.
You don't got one.
66
00:03:53,885 --> 00:03:55,539
[SPEAKS FRENCH]
67
00:03:55,626 --> 00:03:59,151
Hey, Jean-Luc.
Hey, Jean-Luc.
68
00:03:59,239 --> 00:04:01,719
Karen, I want to thank you
for lending me this tape.
69
00:04:01,806 --> 00:04:04,374
Uh, after
carefully reviewing it,
70
00:04:04,461 --> 00:04:06,333
I'm happy to say
that I was right.
71
00:04:06,420 --> 00:04:09,814
I do in fact
have buns of steel.
72
00:04:09,901 --> 00:04:14,993
Now then,
who would like to guess
what I am doing this Saturday?
73
00:04:15,080 --> 00:04:16,691
Using your butt
as a wrecking ball?
[LAUGHS]
74
00:04:18,127 --> 00:04:19,520
No.
75
00:04:19,607 --> 00:04:23,524
This Saturday,
I, Jean-Luc Rieupeyroux,
76
00:04:23,611 --> 00:04:26,701
will be cutting the hair of
somebody so incredibly famous
77
00:04:26,788 --> 00:04:28,006
that when you find out
who it is,
78
00:04:28,093 --> 00:04:29,399
you will all die.
79
00:04:29,486 --> 00:04:31,749
Who is it?
I cannot tell you.
80
00:04:31,836 --> 00:04:33,447
My client has
sworn me to secrecy.
81
00:04:33,534 --> 00:04:36,319
There is nothing
you can say or do
82
00:04:36,406 --> 00:04:39,148
that will make me
divulge the identity
83
00:04:39,235 --> 00:04:41,672
of my incredibly
famous client.
84
00:04:41,759 --> 00:04:45,067
Unless, of course, you happen
to figure out who it is
85
00:04:45,154 --> 00:04:47,417
by flipping through
this celebrity magazine
86
00:04:47,504 --> 00:04:49,941
and sneaking a peek
at his or her picture.
87
00:04:50,028 --> 00:04:51,421
In which case,
it's not my fault.
88
00:04:51,508 --> 00:04:53,771
It's just
a little thing...
89
00:04:53,858 --> 00:04:55,207
Is it Dennis Rodman?
90
00:04:55,295 --> 00:04:57,775
Nope. He has his hair cut
at 31 Flavors.
91
00:04:59,864 --> 00:05:04,216
Oh, is it
Michelle Pfeiffer?
92
00:05:04,304 --> 00:05:06,044
Get real.
She's married.
93
00:05:06,131 --> 00:05:12,529
And it's a shame too,
94
00:05:12,616 --> 00:05:14,749
Oh, look,
it's the Baywatchbabes.
95
00:05:14,836 --> 00:05:16,228
Is it one of them?
96
00:05:16,316 --> 00:05:20,537
That's not Baywatch.
97
00:05:20,624 --> 00:05:24,933
Get some glasses.
98
00:05:25,020 --> 00:05:26,456
This is somebody so big
99
00:05:26,543 --> 00:05:28,284
that they have
only one name.
100
00:05:30,895 --> 00:05:31,896
Sting.
No.
101
00:05:31,983 --> 00:05:33,071
Cher.
No.
102
00:05:33,158 --> 00:05:34,682
Gandhi?
103
00:05:37,772 --> 00:05:38,903
No.
104
00:05:38,990 --> 00:05:40,514
He's dead and he's bald.
105
00:05:42,254 --> 00:05:43,560
I give you one more hint.
106
00:05:43,647 --> 00:05:45,736
This person
has the only one name,
107
00:05:45,823 --> 00:05:47,216
and it begin
with the letter F.
108
00:05:48,652 --> 00:05:49,784
Flipper.
109
00:05:52,134 --> 00:05:54,484
Yes, that's right, Brendan.
It's Flipper.
110
00:05:54,571 --> 00:05:56,878
I'm going to cut
Flipper's hair.
111
00:05:56,965 --> 00:05:59,359
I'm going to dive
right into that tank,
112
00:05:59,446 --> 00:06:02,274
and I'm gonna put some
dippity-do on his dorsal fin.
113
00:06:02,362 --> 00:06:05,016
Yes, that's what I--
All right, this group
is never gonna figure it out.
114
00:06:05,103 --> 00:06:07,628
It's hopeless.
Unless, of course,
115
00:06:07,715 --> 00:06:10,457
you happen to show up
at my apartment this Saturday
116
00:06:10,544 --> 00:06:13,242
at exactly 2:00 p.m.
117
00:06:13,329 --> 00:06:16,245
where I will be
cutting this incredibly
famous person's hair
118
00:06:16,332 --> 00:06:18,073
who has only one name
that begin with
the letter F.
119
00:06:18,160 --> 00:06:19,248
That's Saturday, 2:00 p.m.,
120
00:06:19,335 --> 00:06:20,641
Jean-Luc Rieupeyroux,
121
00:06:20,728 --> 00:06:21,946
one word,
begins with the letter F,
122
00:06:22,033 --> 00:06:23,513
but you didn't
hear it from me.
123
00:06:25,210 --> 00:06:27,256
And people say
I can't keep a secret.
124
00:06:27,822 --> 00:06:28,866
Ha!
125
00:06:37,309 --> 00:06:38,789
[CHILDREN CLAMORING]
126
00:06:44,752 --> 00:06:45,970
Oh, hello, boys.
127
00:06:46,057 --> 00:06:47,363
Hi, Mrs. Lambert.
128
00:06:47,450 --> 00:06:49,931
Hi, Carol.
I'm sorry we're late,
129
00:06:50,018 --> 00:06:52,150
but the boys
had a little problem.
130
00:06:52,237 --> 00:06:55,545
See, Brian stuck
a peanut up his nose,
131
00:06:55,632 --> 00:06:58,592
and Ryan tried to get it out
with a Dustbuster.
132
00:07:00,376 --> 00:07:05,294
It worked.
133
00:07:05,381 --> 00:07:06,948
A marble?
[LAUGHS]
134
00:07:07,035 --> 00:07:08,515
Well, it's okay.
We're just
getting started.
135
00:07:08,602 --> 00:07:09,646
Come on in.
Come on in.
136
00:07:11,996 --> 00:07:14,869
Well, I'm gonna be
next door getting coffee
if you need me.
137
00:07:14,956 --> 00:07:16,479
Well, I
won't be here.
138
00:07:16,566 --> 00:07:20,657
My daughter Dana
thinks it's easy
139
00:07:20,744 --> 00:07:22,398
so she'll be running
this whole thing for me.
140
00:07:22,485 --> 00:07:23,965
Hi.
Hi.
141
00:07:24,052 --> 00:07:26,750
Did you ever
run a children's
birthday party before?
142
00:07:28,491 --> 00:07:30,754
[CHUCKLES] Do you get
migraine headaches?
143
00:07:32,452 --> 00:07:34,584
[LAUGHS]
You will.
144
00:07:36,064 --> 00:07:37,631
Well, Dana,
I'll be next door
145
00:07:37,718 --> 00:07:40,677
having some coffee
with Frank,
146
00:07:40,764 --> 00:07:42,636
it'll cost you 50 bucks.
[LAUGHS]
147
00:07:46,117 --> 00:07:49,817
Oh, wow.
[LAUGHS]
148
00:07:49,904 --> 00:07:51,862
[GASPS] A ball pit!
Whoo!
149
00:07:51,949 --> 00:07:53,168
Rich.
Rich! Hey!
150
00:07:53,255 --> 00:07:54,952
Rich.
151
00:07:55,039 --> 00:07:56,214
Dive! Dive!
152
00:07:56,301 --> 00:07:57,477
Rich.
153
00:08:00,480 --> 00:08:02,046
You are not a guest.
154
00:08:02,133 --> 00:08:05,093
You are here to help me
with the party.
155
00:08:05,180 --> 00:08:06,921
Do I get cake?
If you're good.
156
00:08:07,008 --> 00:08:08,966
Ooh, you're strict.
I like that.
157
00:08:09,053 --> 00:08:10,577
Get out.
158
00:08:10,664 --> 00:08:13,710
ALL: [CHANTING]
We want tokens!
We want tokens!
159
00:08:13,797 --> 00:08:15,973
DANA: Okay!
All right. All right.
160
00:08:16,060 --> 00:08:17,975
Everybody,
quiet down.
161
00:08:18,062 --> 00:08:19,411
All right, how many--
162
00:08:19,499 --> 00:08:20,935
We want...
163
00:08:22,850 --> 00:08:25,940
ALL:
We want tokens!
We want tokens!
164
00:08:26,027 --> 00:08:27,594
[BLOWS WHISTLE]
165
00:08:27,681 --> 00:08:29,944
All right,
fun time is over.
166
00:08:30,031 --> 00:08:32,076
It is time
to start the party.
167
00:08:32,163 --> 00:08:33,904
Here are the rules.
168
00:08:33,991 --> 00:08:38,082
No running,
no yelling,
no hitting.
169
00:08:38,169 --> 00:08:39,388
Lady, lady, lady.
170
00:08:39,475 --> 00:08:41,651
DANA: What?
He licked me.
171
00:08:42,870 --> 00:08:44,698
No licking.
172
00:08:44,785 --> 00:08:48,092
How are we supposed
to have ice cream
if we can't lick?
173
00:08:50,530 --> 00:08:52,575
Okay, you can
lick ice cream.
174
00:08:52,662 --> 00:08:54,403
Can we lick the pizza?
175
00:08:56,100 --> 00:08:58,320
You can lick food,
but not a person.
176
00:08:58,407 --> 00:09:01,366
What if we lick somebody
by accident?
177
00:09:02,977 --> 00:09:05,414
Can we just move on
from this whole licking thing?
178
00:09:05,501 --> 00:09:07,155
When do we
get to play?
179
00:09:07,242 --> 00:09:08,504
ALL:
Yeah!
180
00:09:08,591 --> 00:09:10,680
Hey, play on
your own time.
181
00:09:10,767 --> 00:09:12,029
This is a party.
182
00:09:12,116 --> 00:09:14,031
ALL:
Boo!
183
00:09:14,118 --> 00:09:16,599
You're ruining
my party!
184
00:09:18,079 --> 00:09:20,124
Honey, uh,
you know, uh,
185
00:09:20,211 --> 00:09:23,171
might wanna lighten up
with this whole
Nazi thing. [CHUCKLES]
186
00:09:23,258 --> 00:09:24,738
I mean, I find it
very attractive,
187
00:09:24,825 --> 00:09:27,436
but I don't think
the kids are digging it.
188
00:09:27,523 --> 00:09:29,438
Listen,
kids respect an adult
189
00:09:29,525 --> 00:09:32,833
who is not afraid
to lay down the law, okay?
190
00:09:32,920 --> 00:09:34,269
All right,
one more rule.
191
00:09:34,356 --> 00:09:36,576
No throwing food.
192
00:09:40,231 --> 00:09:41,363
[CHILDREN LAUGHING]
193
00:09:43,626 --> 00:09:47,021
Hey, kids.
I'm Possum Dave.
194
00:09:47,108 --> 00:09:48,413
Obviously.
195
00:09:48,500 --> 00:09:50,546
For the next
five minutes,
196
00:09:50,633 --> 00:09:52,548
all games are free!
197
00:09:52,635 --> 00:09:54,855
[ALL CHEER]
198
00:09:54,942 --> 00:09:56,639
Wait a minute!
[BLOWS WHISTLE]
199
00:09:56,726 --> 00:09:59,163
Get back here! Hey!
I'm in charge here.
200
00:09:59,250 --> 00:10:00,774
Listen to me!
201
00:10:00,861 --> 00:10:02,427
[CHILDREN CLAMORING]
202
00:10:09,478 --> 00:10:11,611
DANA:
All right, stop it.
203
00:10:11,698 --> 00:10:13,264
Stop it.
That's enough.
204
00:10:13,351 --> 00:10:15,919
All right.
All right, enough.
Enough now. Serious.
205
00:10:16,006 --> 00:10:17,529
Rich!
Rich, help me.
206
00:10:17,617 --> 00:10:20,315
Get me out of here.
207
00:10:20,402 --> 00:10:22,534
Back. Back--
ooh. Away!
208
00:10:22,622 --> 00:10:23,623
Away! Hey!
209
00:10:23,710 --> 00:10:26,582
[GROANING]
Hey! Hey!
210
00:10:26,669 --> 00:10:28,628
Look! Look!
Free tokens.
211
00:10:28,715 --> 00:10:30,107
Free! Free!
212
00:10:30,194 --> 00:10:32,283
Away! Away!
213
00:10:32,370 --> 00:10:34,416
What? Oh, honey,
let me help you.
214
00:10:34,503 --> 00:10:35,896
Let me help you, honey.
215
00:10:35,983 --> 00:10:37,811
I got you. I got you.
216
00:10:37,898 --> 00:10:40,204
All right. Okay.
217
00:10:40,291 --> 00:10:41,771
You okay? You--
218
00:10:45,166 --> 00:10:48,343
I'll--I'll accept that
as an accident.
219
00:10:54,566 --> 00:10:55,872
Where were you?
220
00:10:55,959 --> 00:10:59,049
Oh. [CHUCKLES]
221
00:10:59,136 --> 00:11:00,747
and they both
missed target.
222
00:11:00,834 --> 00:11:05,752
[LAUGHS]
223
00:11:05,839 --> 00:11:07,623
Great. So I'm out here
fighting for my life,
224
00:11:07,710 --> 00:11:09,364
and you're worried
about your socks?
225
00:11:09,451 --> 00:11:11,061
Honey, they're just
having a little fun.
226
00:11:11,148 --> 00:11:13,281
Besides,
I thought you said
babysitting wasn't hard.
227
00:11:13,368 --> 00:11:14,935
Well, maybe
it wouldn't be
228
00:11:15,022 --> 00:11:16,284
if you were
out here helping me
229
00:11:16,371 --> 00:11:17,851
instead of playing
with the kids.
230
00:11:17,938 --> 00:11:19,679
Lady!
231
00:11:19,766 --> 00:11:21,855
More tokens.
More tokens.
More tokens...
232
00:11:21,942 --> 00:11:23,987
Be quiet. I'm having
a conversation, okay?
233
00:11:24,074 --> 00:11:26,990
You know, maybe the kids
wouldn't be so wild
234
00:11:27,077 --> 00:11:29,166
if you were a little bit
more nurturing.
235
00:11:29,253 --> 00:11:32,256
What do you mean
I'm not nurturing?
236
00:11:32,343 --> 00:11:34,389
Oh, pipe down now,
you little twerp.
237
00:11:37,871 --> 00:11:39,089
Oh, how cute.
238
00:11:39,176 --> 00:11:40,917
A couple of kids
are playing tug of war...
239
00:11:41,004 --> 00:11:42,397
With your jacket.
240
00:11:43,050 --> 00:11:44,268
Hey.
241
00:11:44,355 --> 00:11:46,531
Put that down.
Drop it!
242
00:11:49,360 --> 00:11:51,623
Ryan, where are
you going?
243
00:11:51,711 --> 00:11:55,453
I want my mommy.
That whistle lady's mean.
244
00:11:55,540 --> 00:12:00,067
The whistle lady?
245
00:12:00,154 --> 00:12:02,417
No, she's yelling
at the guy I peed on.
246
00:12:04,375 --> 00:12:05,594
You peed on a guy?
247
00:12:06,769 --> 00:12:09,206
Frank,
we can't have kids
248
00:12:09,293 --> 00:12:10,294
Let's go in there
and take over.
249
00:12:10,381 --> 00:12:12,775
Uh, honey,
wait a minute.
250
00:12:12,862 --> 00:12:15,909
If Dana doesn't know
that Ryan's out here,
251
00:12:15,996 --> 00:12:17,867
we could let her
sweat a little.
252
00:12:21,175 --> 00:12:23,873
How about I take you
inside to your mom
253
00:12:23,960 --> 00:12:25,483
and we'll let
Mrs. Lambert
254
00:12:25,570 --> 00:12:28,443
go in there and torture
the mean whistle lady?
255
00:12:28,530 --> 00:12:30,053
Yeah.
Yeah.
256
00:12:31,185 --> 00:12:33,013
Yeah.
Yeah!
257
00:12:37,713 --> 00:12:38,932
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
258
00:12:40,760 --> 00:12:41,891
Hey, Jean-Luc.
259
00:12:41,978 --> 00:12:43,110
Hey.
260
00:12:43,197 --> 00:12:44,807
Oh. Oh.
261
00:12:44,894 --> 00:12:47,549
[SPEAKS FRENCH]
262
00:12:47,636 --> 00:12:51,422
waiting for a famous
celebrity client
at exactly 2:00 p.m.?
263
00:12:51,509 --> 00:12:53,120
Uh, you told us.
264
00:12:53,207 --> 00:12:54,991
Well, never mind.
265
00:12:55,078 --> 00:12:56,993
Since you're here,
you may as well meet
266
00:12:57,080 --> 00:12:59,256
my incredibly famous
celebrity client
267
00:12:59,343 --> 00:13:02,216
who has only one name
which begin with
the letter F.
268
00:13:02,303 --> 00:13:04,653
Well, J.T. thinks
he knows who the
mystery client is.
269
00:13:04,740 --> 00:13:07,134
It's Frederique, right?
The underwear model, right?
270
00:13:07,221 --> 00:13:08,875
Come on, say it's her.
Please, please, please.
271
00:13:10,572 --> 00:13:12,313
He's a little worked up
over this.
272
00:13:12,400 --> 00:13:14,837
That's why I decided
to come along.
273
00:13:14,924 --> 00:13:17,013
Sam, you know I'm
totally devoted to you,
274
00:13:17,100 --> 00:13:19,973
but the human body
is God's finest work of art.
275
00:13:20,060 --> 00:13:22,453
I mean, can't I
enjoy a masterpiece
when I see one?
276
00:13:22,540 --> 00:13:25,282
Uh, J.T., did I mention that
this masterpiece is a guy?
277
00:13:25,369 --> 00:13:27,197
That's sick.
Let's get out of here.
Come on, Sam.
278
00:13:27,284 --> 00:13:29,417
Oh, wait a minute.
279
00:13:29,504 --> 00:13:32,159
Jean-Luc, is your client
a good-looking guy?
280
00:13:32,246 --> 00:13:34,814
Well, he has the body
of a Greek statue.
281
00:13:34,901 --> 00:13:37,599
Well, hey, J.T.
has the body of a statue.
282
00:13:37,686 --> 00:13:38,687
Buddha.
283
00:13:40,341 --> 00:13:42,038
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
284
00:13:42,125 --> 00:13:44,301
Okay, everybody
just act naturally.
285
00:13:46,564 --> 00:13:48,175
If it's Famous Amos,
286
00:13:48,262 --> 00:13:49,785
I hope
he brought cookies.
287
00:13:59,969 --> 00:14:02,493
Oh, my God.
It's Fabio.
288
00:14:02,580 --> 00:14:04,321
Bonjour, mon ami.
Hey, bonjour,Jean-Luc.
289
00:14:04,408 --> 00:14:05,975
[BOTH SPEAK ITALIAN]
290
00:14:06,062 --> 00:14:08,369
[SIGHS]
Isn't he gorgeous?
291
00:14:08,456 --> 00:14:10,937
Well, to tell you the truth,
I'm really not that impressed.
292
00:14:11,024 --> 00:14:13,940
Can you please
take my jacket?
293
00:14:14,027 --> 00:14:15,550
Sure.
294
00:14:15,637 --> 00:14:19,032
Okay.
Now I'm impressed.
295
00:14:19,119 --> 00:14:21,295
Fabio,
I'd like you to meet
some of my friend.
296
00:14:21,382 --> 00:14:23,775
Uh, somehow they found out
that you were
going to be here,
297
00:14:23,863 --> 00:14:26,778
and they just couldn't,
uh, pass up the opportunity
298
00:14:26,866 --> 00:14:29,651
to meet a world-famous
celebrity like yourself.
299
00:14:29,738 --> 00:14:31,218
Well,
who could blame them?
300
00:14:33,829 --> 00:14:35,309
It's a pleasure...
301
00:14:36,701 --> 00:14:38,007
To meet...
302
00:14:39,269 --> 00:14:40,401
You.
303
00:14:43,360 --> 00:14:45,188
Uh, Fabio,
would you like
to sit in a chair?
304
00:14:45,275 --> 00:14:46,363
Sure.
Why not?
305
00:14:49,627 --> 00:14:53,893
I don't get it.
306
00:14:53,980 --> 00:14:55,503
A body and a job.
307
00:14:57,679 --> 00:14:58,941
My God.
308
00:14:59,028 --> 00:15:01,944
That is one
massive Italian.
309
00:15:08,733 --> 00:15:12,824
Uh, I have over 500
of your novels, Mr. Fabio.
310
00:15:14,870 --> 00:15:16,480
To tell you the truth,
I didn't write
all those novels.
311
00:15:16,567 --> 00:15:18,352
I just posed
for the covers.
312
00:15:18,439 --> 00:15:20,267
Oh, that's okay.
I don't read them.
313
00:15:20,354 --> 00:15:22,530
I just look at
your picture. [LAUGHS]
314
00:15:22,617 --> 00:15:24,662
Don't worry, honey.
I still make the money.
315
00:15:26,838 --> 00:15:28,753
Okay, I'm ready
to begin.
316
00:15:28,840 --> 00:15:30,886
Everybody,
stand back.
317
00:15:30,973 --> 00:15:33,845
I, Jean-Luc Rieupeyroux,
318
00:15:33,933 --> 00:15:35,499
am about to
get a vision.
319
00:15:36,718 --> 00:15:39,373
Yes,
I'm seeing the vision.
320
00:15:39,460 --> 00:15:41,636
I'm seeing
the perfection,
321
00:15:41,723 --> 00:15:44,291
and I know exactly
how to achieve it.
322
00:15:44,378 --> 00:15:47,772
Get ready for the total
hair-styling experience
323
00:15:47,859 --> 00:15:50,688
and complete
grooming makeover.
324
00:16:00,481 --> 00:16:02,091
Yes! Voila.
325
00:16:02,178 --> 00:16:05,529
Fini!You are perfect once again.
326
00:16:05,616 --> 00:16:07,096
See you again
in six months.
327
00:16:09,055 --> 00:16:10,230
I want
that hair.
328
00:16:10,317 --> 00:16:11,318
No,
it's mine!
329
00:16:11,405 --> 00:16:15,975
Not if I
can help it.
330
00:16:16,062 --> 00:16:19,369
I have a package of my hair
just for this occasion.
331
00:16:19,456 --> 00:16:20,980
For each of you.
332
00:16:21,937 --> 00:16:22,938
Here we go.
333
00:16:23,025 --> 00:16:24,984
[GASPING]
334
00:16:27,116 --> 00:16:29,205
So how do you like
your new haircut?
335
00:16:29,292 --> 00:16:31,077
Jean-Luc,
you are a genius.
336
00:16:31,164 --> 00:16:32,556
No, come on.
You are a genius.
337
00:16:32,643 --> 00:16:33,688
No, no, no, you are.
338
00:16:33,775 --> 00:16:36,996
Come on!
You are a genius.
339
00:16:37,083 --> 00:16:38,606
Okay, I'm a genius.
340
00:16:39,650 --> 00:16:40,825
And I'm Fabio.
341
00:16:45,569 --> 00:16:46,614
KIDS: [CHANTING]
We want cake!
We want cake!
342
00:16:46,701 --> 00:16:49,704
DANA:
Okay. Okay.
343
00:16:49,791 --> 00:16:51,271
All right.
Okay, all right.
344
00:16:51,358 --> 00:16:57,625
Everybody, sit down,
345
00:16:57,712 --> 00:16:59,496
Hey, I caught
a couple more of 'em.
346
00:16:59,583 --> 00:17:01,020
Found 'em breaking into
the token machine
347
00:17:01,107 --> 00:17:02,325
with a screwdriver.
348
00:17:03,761 --> 00:17:06,025
Ooh, that was
a good one, too.
349
00:17:07,983 --> 00:17:10,333
Hi, Dana.
How's it going?
350
00:17:10,420 --> 00:17:12,901
Great.
It's going just great.
Right, kids?
351
00:17:12,988 --> 00:17:16,209
KIDS: Boo!
352
00:17:16,296 --> 00:17:18,341
Gee, Rich.
Maybe we should
take a head count
353
00:17:18,428 --> 00:17:20,343
so we know how many pieces
of cake to cut, huh?
354
00:17:20,430 --> 00:17:22,084
You got it.
Two, four, six, eight,
355
00:17:22,171 --> 00:17:25,522
ten, 12, 14, 15 kids.
356
00:17:25,609 --> 00:17:27,611
No. No, that's impossible.
357
00:17:27,698 --> 00:17:29,222
We're supposed
to have 16.
358
00:17:30,832 --> 00:17:32,355
God, Rich.
I think we lost a kid.
359
00:17:32,442 --> 00:17:34,662
You lost a kid?
360
00:17:34,749 --> 00:17:37,056
Well, we still got
15 out of 16.
361
00:17:37,143 --> 00:17:38,840
That's good enough
for an A, isn't it?
362
00:17:38,927 --> 00:17:40,885
Rich, these are kids.
Not a spelling test.
363
00:17:40,972 --> 00:17:44,759
We... We need
all of 'em.
364
00:17:44,846 --> 00:17:48,023
ALL: [CHANTING]
We want cake!
We want cake!
365
00:17:48,850 --> 00:17:50,808
Ryan! Ryan!
366
00:17:50,895 --> 00:17:52,897
Whichever one you are,
where are you?
367
00:17:52,984 --> 00:17:55,813
Gee, Dana, you sound
kind of frazzled.
368
00:17:55,900 --> 00:18:00,818
Frazzled?
I'm going insane.
369
00:18:00,905 --> 00:18:04,083
God, I wish somebody could
just make 'em be quiet.
370
00:18:04,170 --> 00:18:08,217
Hey, five tokens
to the kid who can
keep quiet the longest.
371
00:18:10,611 --> 00:18:13,440
Ryan. Ryan.
372
00:18:13,527 --> 00:18:15,355
It's time
for the cake.
373
00:18:15,442 --> 00:18:16,878
Come out.
374
00:18:18,271 --> 00:18:19,707
Mom,
I need your help.
375
00:18:19,794 --> 00:18:21,491
I'm begging.
376
00:18:21,578 --> 00:18:23,537
Begging?
You owe me 50 bucks.
377
00:18:23,624 --> 00:18:25,669
Who cares about the bet?
I lost a kid.
378
00:18:25,756 --> 00:18:27,628
Oh, you mean
Ryan, the other twin?
379
00:18:27,715 --> 00:18:28,846
Yes.
380
00:18:28,933 --> 00:18:30,587
Oh, he's okay.
381
00:18:30,674 --> 00:18:37,333
We found him outside,
382
00:18:37,420 --> 00:18:42,338
You mean you knew
he was safe
383
00:18:42,425 --> 00:18:44,601
Yeah.
It was really fun.
384
00:18:46,386 --> 00:18:47,474
I can't believe that.
385
00:18:47,561 --> 00:18:48,779
How could you
do that to me?
386
00:18:48,866 --> 00:18:51,173
Oh. Oh, excuse me
just a minute.
387
00:18:51,260 --> 00:18:53,001
Weren't you the one
who said,
388
00:18:53,088 --> 00:18:56,657
"Why do you need help,
389
00:18:56,744 --> 00:18:59,225
"all you need to do
is let 'em know who's boss"?
390
00:18:59,312 --> 00:19:02,271
Okay, fine,
so I underestimated
how hard it is
391
00:19:02,358 --> 00:19:03,838
to be in charge
of something like this.
392
00:19:03,925 --> 00:19:05,318
Well, everyone does,
you know.
393
00:19:05,405 --> 00:19:09,322
Unless you've
had a kid,
394
00:19:09,409 --> 00:19:11,454
Mothers get no credit
for this work,
395
00:19:11,541 --> 00:19:14,240
and it is the single
most important job
396
00:19:14,327 --> 00:19:15,676
we have as adults.
397
00:19:17,156 --> 00:19:18,592
You're right.
398
00:19:18,679 --> 00:19:19,941
I don't give you
enough credit.
399
00:19:20,028 --> 00:19:21,725
I mean,
with seven of us,
400
00:19:21,812 --> 00:19:24,119
I have no idea how
you can handle that.
401
00:19:28,341 --> 00:19:30,256
You'll do just fine
when you have your own kids.
402
00:19:32,519 --> 00:19:36,914
Why?
403
00:19:37,001 --> 00:19:41,745
Oh, don't do that.
404
00:19:41,832 --> 00:19:45,096
Okay, kids, it's time
to sing the birthday song.
405
00:19:45,184 --> 00:19:48,839
ALL:
♪ Happy birthday to you
406
00:19:48,926 --> 00:19:52,191
♪ Happy birthday to you
407
00:19:52,278 --> 00:19:56,151
♪ Happy birthday, dear Lilly
408
00:19:56,238 --> 00:19:59,589
♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
409
00:19:59,676 --> 00:20:01,417
Okay, Lilly,
make a wish.
410
00:20:01,504 --> 00:20:04,464
I wish Dana
would lighten up.
411
00:20:04,551 --> 00:20:06,379
[ALL CHEER]
412
00:20:12,123 --> 00:20:17,999
"And so...
413
00:20:18,086 --> 00:20:21,089
"they gaze into
each other's eyes,
414
00:20:23,265 --> 00:20:26,529
"knowing that the fire
of their passion
415
00:20:28,662 --> 00:20:31,447
"would burn on
throughout their lives...
416
00:20:32,666 --> 00:20:36,191
"Forever... And ever.
417
00:20:37,627 --> 00:20:39,890
"And ever."
418
00:20:40,674 --> 00:20:42,241
That's the end.
419
00:20:43,416 --> 00:20:45,592
That was so romantic.
420
00:20:45,679 --> 00:20:46,984
Read it again.
421
00:20:49,073 --> 00:20:50,814
I'm sorry, ladies,
but I have to go
422
00:20:50,901 --> 00:20:53,077
or I'll miss my flight.
423
00:20:53,164 --> 00:20:56,690
Oh, can you wait
just a minute?
424
00:20:56,777 --> 00:20:57,778
Sure.
Okay.
425
00:20:59,519 --> 00:21:01,390
I don't have
any of your books.
426
00:21:01,477 --> 00:21:03,566
I'll just go get my
pillow for you to sign.
427
00:21:03,653 --> 00:21:05,133
Okay.
428
00:21:16,579 --> 00:21:18,277
Hi. I'm Fabio.
429
00:21:25,675 --> 00:21:28,330
Oh, my God.
I'm hallucinating.
430
00:21:28,417 --> 00:21:31,333
No, you're not.
Honestly, I am Fabio.
431
00:21:31,420 --> 00:21:34,815
[SCOFFS] Yeah, right,
and I'm Aretha Franklin,
queen of soul.
29941
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