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1
00:00:07,703 --> 00:00:10,227
J.T., dude, you gotta
help me out, man.
2
00:00:10,314 --> 00:00:12,577
-I got a major problem.
-Sure, man. What is it?
3
00:00:12,664 --> 00:00:13,926
[SIGHS] I'm dead.
4
00:00:16,973 --> 00:00:17,974
You mean, you're in trouble?
5
00:00:18,061 --> 00:00:20,020
No. I mean, I'm dead.
6
00:00:20,107 --> 00:00:22,718
Deceased.
Pushin' up the daisies.
7
00:00:22,805 --> 00:00:24,720
That sweet chariot
is swingin' low
8
00:00:24,807 --> 00:00:26,722
and coming forward
to carry me home.
9
00:00:28,506 --> 00:00:30,291
Cody, what are you
talking about?
10
00:00:30,378 --> 00:00:31,857
This. Check it out.
11
00:00:31,944 --> 00:00:34,512
The newspaper ran
my obituary this morning.
12
00:00:34,599 --> 00:00:36,036
I wasn't even cold yet.
13
00:00:38,125 --> 00:00:40,344
"Cody Lambert
of Port Washington, Wisconsin
14
00:00:40,431 --> 00:00:42,303
"died yesterday
of natural causes."
15
00:00:42,390 --> 00:00:43,826
You see?
16
00:00:43,913 --> 00:00:46,524
[SNIFFLES] I'm on the voyage
to that final frontier
17
00:00:46,611 --> 00:00:48,657
from which the Enterprise
never returned.
18
00:00:48,744 --> 00:00:50,050
[SOBS] Oh, God!
19
00:00:51,964 --> 00:00:53,792
Cody, you're not dead.
Think about it.
20
00:00:53,879 --> 00:00:55,403
If you're dead, then how come
we could see you?
21
00:00:56,186 --> 00:00:57,144
That's right.
22
00:00:59,842 --> 00:01:01,887
Yeah, that's a good point.
23
00:01:03,280 --> 00:01:04,542
Maybe I'm a ghost.
24
00:01:05,761 --> 00:01:06,936
Cool!
25
00:01:08,590 --> 00:01:11,897
Dude, I always wanted
to walk through a wall.
26
00:01:11,984 --> 00:01:13,421
[CHUCKLES] All right.
27
00:01:19,122 --> 00:01:22,082
Dude, maybe St. Peter
didn't get my paperwork yet.
28
00:01:22,169 --> 00:01:23,822
[LAUGHS]
29
00:01:23,909 --> 00:01:25,607
[THEME SONG PLAYING]
30
00:01:25,694 --> 00:01:27,304
[PEOPLE SHOUTING]
31
00:01:31,308 --> 00:01:32,962
MAN:
♪ The dream got broken
32
00:01:33,049 --> 00:01:34,790
♪ Seemed like all was lost
33
00:01:34,877 --> 00:01:36,748
♪ What would be the future?
34
00:01:36,835 --> 00:01:38,359
♪ Could you pay the cost?
35
00:01:38,446 --> 00:01:39,708
♪ You wonder
36
00:01:39,795 --> 00:01:41,275
♪ Will there ever be
37
00:01:41,362 --> 00:01:43,146
♪ A second time around?
38
00:01:45,017 --> 00:01:46,410
WOMAN:
♪ Woah-a, woah-a
39
00:01:46,497 --> 00:01:48,108
♪ When the tears are over
40
00:01:48,195 --> 00:01:50,414
♪ And the moment has come
41
00:01:50,501 --> 00:01:54,070
♪ Say, "My Lord
I think I found someone"
42
00:01:54,157 --> 00:01:56,116
♪ You know it will be better
43
00:01:56,203 --> 00:01:57,595
♪ 'Cause you're
putting it together
44
00:01:57,682 --> 00:02:00,250
♪ For the second time around
45
00:02:06,561 --> 00:02:09,868
ALL:
♪ Step by step, day by day
46
00:02:09,955 --> 00:02:11,174
WOMAN:
♪ Day by day
47
00:02:11,261 --> 00:02:12,393
ALL:
♪ A fresh start over
48
00:02:12,480 --> 00:02:14,221
♪ A different hand to play
49
00:02:14,308 --> 00:02:16,005
♪ The deeper we fall
50
00:02:16,092 --> 00:02:18,355
♪ The stronger we stay
51
00:02:18,442 --> 00:02:20,314
WOMAN:
♪ We'll make it better
52
00:02:20,401 --> 00:02:23,012
MAN:
♪ The second time around ♪
53
00:02:31,847 --> 00:02:33,457
[ALL CLAMORING]
54
00:02:33,544 --> 00:02:35,067
Yeah, hey, uh,
this is Frank Lambert
55
00:02:35,155 --> 00:02:36,330
over at Lambert Constructions.
56
00:02:36,417 --> 00:02:37,635
-Dad, please.
-Yeah, Al, would you just
57
00:02:37,722 --> 00:02:39,289
wait a minute, please?
Thank you.
58
00:02:39,376 --> 00:02:41,204
-Have my roofing tiles
come in yet?
-Mom,
59
00:02:41,291 --> 00:02:42,727
-my waffles are cold.
-All right,
just a minute, Mark.
60
00:02:42,814 --> 00:02:44,381
Karen, how's this? Karen,
Karen, Karen, how's this?
61
00:02:44,468 --> 00:02:45,774
Give me a minute,
would you, please?
62
00:02:45,861 --> 00:02:47,167
-Mom, you missed a spot.
-Dad!
63
00:02:47,254 --> 00:02:49,647
-Mom, waffles?
-Just a minute, Mark.
64
00:02:49,734 --> 00:02:50,866
But, Mom, they're cold.
65
00:02:50,953 --> 00:02:52,172
[SIGHS] Give me that.
66
00:02:53,085 --> 00:02:54,391
[SIZZLES]
67
00:02:55,914 --> 00:02:57,220
There. Now, they're hot.
68
00:02:57,307 --> 00:02:59,135
All right.
69
00:02:59,222 --> 00:03:00,919
FRANK: Now I'm sorry, pal.
70
00:03:01,006 --> 00:03:03,183
Yeah, but that's just
not gonna cut it, okay?
71
00:03:03,270 --> 00:03:05,054
-Dad, permission slip.
-Yeah, okay. Hang on.
72
00:03:05,141 --> 00:03:06,621
Yeah, but well, when are
they coming in anyway?
73
00:03:08,579 --> 00:03:09,580
Huh?
74
00:03:09,667 --> 00:03:11,060
Permission slip.
75
00:03:11,147 --> 00:03:12,409
Well, listen here,
that's not gonna work
76
00:03:12,496 --> 00:03:14,368
'cause I'm putting
the roof on today.
77
00:03:14,455 --> 00:03:16,196
Listen, I ordered those tiles
78
00:03:16,283 --> 00:03:17,675
-six weeks ago.
-Permission slip.
79
00:03:17,762 --> 00:03:19,242
And you promised me
that they'd be in...
80
00:03:21,331 --> 00:03:23,551
Yeah, yeah, [STAMMERS]
hold on a minute, hold on.
81
00:03:25,161 --> 00:03:26,162
Who are you?
82
00:03:27,816 --> 00:03:29,121
I'm Brendan's friend.
83
00:03:29,209 --> 00:03:30,427
Can I go to the museum too?
84
00:03:31,776 --> 00:03:33,778
Sure. Why not?
85
00:03:33,865 --> 00:03:35,171
-Okay, listen, you call me
as soon a they come in...
-Thanks.
86
00:03:35,258 --> 00:03:36,694
...would you?
No problem, pal.
87
00:03:36,781 --> 00:03:38,392
-Come on. Let's go.
-Okay, kids, come on.
88
00:03:38,479 --> 00:03:40,350
-Everybody, in the car.
-Shotgun.
89
00:03:40,437 --> 00:03:42,787
ALL: No, I get it.
90
00:03:42,874 --> 00:03:44,833
Carol, come home for dinner.
I'll see you at 6:00.
91
00:03:44,920 --> 00:03:46,965
-I can't. I have PTA tomorrow.
-DANA: Don't push me.
92
00:03:47,052 --> 00:03:49,838
-J.T.: Al pushed you.
-Brendan's got,
uh, Cub Scouts.
93
00:03:49,925 --> 00:03:51,883
-Maybe on the weekend, huh?
-Oh, I'll get back to you.
94
00:03:51,970 --> 00:03:53,189
Yeah, you'll get back to me.
95
00:03:53,276 --> 00:03:54,973
J.T.: Come on, Dad.
We're late.
96
00:03:55,060 --> 00:03:56,279
[SIGHS] Oh.
97
00:03:59,021 --> 00:04:00,022
[SIGHS WEARILY]
98
00:04:01,415 --> 00:04:02,546
You'll get back to me?
99
00:04:03,808 --> 00:04:05,157
Frank, Frank, this is crazy.
100
00:04:05,245 --> 00:04:06,768
I mean, we have not spent
101
00:04:06,855 --> 00:04:08,726
five minutes alone together
in the last month.
102
00:04:08,813 --> 00:04:10,337
I know.
103
00:04:10,424 --> 00:04:13,688
And it's gonna stop tonight.
104
00:04:13,775 --> 00:04:15,690
You're gonna call
and cancel your PTA.
105
00:04:15,777 --> 00:04:17,996
-Oh, I...
-And I'm gonna make us
a reservation
106
00:04:18,083 --> 00:04:20,042
at Chez Paris
restaurant, okay?
107
00:04:20,129 --> 00:04:21,609
We'll have a nice quiet dinner
108
00:04:21,696 --> 00:04:23,872
go to a movie,
we'll park by the lake
109
00:04:23,959 --> 00:04:25,656
and I can help you work off
110
00:04:25,743 --> 00:04:28,572
some of those
post-pregnancy bounce.
[CHUCKLES]
111
00:04:28,659 --> 00:04:30,182
Well, if I have to workout
112
00:04:30,270 --> 00:04:32,968
I guess I might as well
work out on you.
113
00:04:33,055 --> 00:04:34,274
[BOTH LAUGHING]
114
00:04:39,844 --> 00:04:41,281
[PLAYING GUITAR]
115
00:04:42,804 --> 00:04:44,371
♪ I got the blues
116
00:04:46,024 --> 00:04:48,984
♪ I got the blues
117
00:04:49,071 --> 00:04:51,421
♪ I got to woke up
yesterday morning
feeling pretty good
118
00:04:51,508 --> 00:04:53,118
♪ Then the Big Kahuna
called me home
119
00:04:53,205 --> 00:04:55,599
♪ Now I'm just looking for those Pearly Gates blues ♪
120
00:04:58,559 --> 00:04:59,951
Hey, Cody. How's it going?
121
00:05:01,475 --> 00:05:03,215
How do you think it's going?
I'm dead.
122
00:05:03,303 --> 00:05:04,739
[SNORTS]
123
00:05:04,826 --> 00:05:06,044
Man, frankly,
this whole thing's
124
00:05:06,131 --> 00:05:07,568
starting to bunch my shorts.
125
00:05:09,309 --> 00:05:11,702
Cody, for the 100th time,
you're not dead.
126
00:05:11,789 --> 00:05:13,269
Oh, yes, I am, bro.
127
00:05:13,356 --> 00:05:14,923
Dude, now I even
got documentation
128
00:05:15,010 --> 00:05:17,012
to prove it, okay?
129
00:05:17,099 --> 00:05:19,101
This morning I went
to my bank machine
to get out some cash,
130
00:05:19,188 --> 00:05:21,408
you know,
for my cemetery plot,
my shroud,
131
00:05:21,495 --> 00:05:24,367
other sundry items
I might need
in the afterlife.
132
00:05:24,454 --> 00:05:25,760
Check this out. I put my card
133
00:05:25,847 --> 00:05:27,414
in the machine.
Guess what it said.
134
00:05:27,501 --> 00:05:28,719
You have lost your mind.
135
00:05:29,851 --> 00:05:31,200
No, no, that's not it.
136
00:05:33,681 --> 00:05:36,553
It said, "Account closed.
Card holder deceased."
137
00:05:38,163 --> 00:05:40,035
Knock, knock, knocking
on heaven's doorknob.
138
00:05:40,122 --> 00:05:41,689
Penniless to boot.
139
00:05:41,776 --> 00:05:43,995
Phew. Man,
that gives me the blues.
140
00:05:44,082 --> 00:05:45,606
[PLAYING GUITAR]
141
00:05:45,693 --> 00:05:48,565
♪ I got the blues
142
00:05:48,652 --> 00:05:51,220
♪ I got the just-bought
TIME magazine for five years
143
00:05:51,307 --> 00:05:53,265
♪ Now I'm not gonna get to read it so I got ripped off
144
00:05:53,353 --> 00:05:56,356
♪ Even though they sent me my free football phone blues ♪
145
00:06:02,753 --> 00:06:03,885
Uh, thank you, girls,
146
00:06:03,972 --> 00:06:05,365
for taking care
of Lilly tonight.
147
00:06:05,452 --> 00:06:07,323
No problem. It'll be cool.
148
00:06:07,410 --> 00:06:09,456
Okay, uh, Frank and I
are bringing
the cellular phones
149
00:06:09,543 --> 00:06:10,848
so you can reach us
at any time.
150
00:06:10,935 --> 00:06:12,459
And here are the numbers
for the pediatrician,
151
00:06:12,546 --> 00:06:14,504
the restaurant,
the Poison Control Center,
152
00:06:14,591 --> 00:06:16,158
and the medevac helicopter
153
00:06:16,245 --> 00:06:17,638
in case you have to airlift
the baby to Chicago.
154
00:06:19,466 --> 00:06:22,164
Mom, with all due respect
155
00:06:22,251 --> 00:06:24,558
to your mothering abilities
156
00:06:24,645 --> 00:06:27,517
taking care of a baby
is not that complicated.
157
00:06:27,604 --> 00:06:29,911
You know, I mean, they eat,
they sleep, they poop.
158
00:06:32,304 --> 00:06:33,305
Kind of like J.T.
159
00:06:35,525 --> 00:06:37,397
Well, I know
it all seems very simple
160
00:06:37,484 --> 00:06:38,833
but taking care of a baby
161
00:06:38,920 --> 00:06:41,139
is a lot harder
than you think.
162
00:06:41,226 --> 00:06:42,967
Believe me, we can handle
163
00:06:43,054 --> 00:06:45,361
a night with the baby.
164
00:06:47,015 --> 00:06:48,712
Okay, honey. Come on.
Let's hurry up.
165
00:06:48,799 --> 00:06:50,105
We only have three
and a half hours
to be alone. Let's move.
166
00:06:50,192 --> 00:06:51,672
Okay, all right,
all right. Bye, girls.
167
00:06:51,759 --> 00:06:53,195
Bye, Lilly. Goodbye, you.
168
00:06:53,282 --> 00:06:55,023
FRANK: Bye-bye, Lilly.
Bye, Lilly. Come on.
169
00:06:55,110 --> 00:06:56,459
-Come on, let's go.
Here we go.
-Bye-bye, Lilly.
170
00:06:56,546 --> 00:06:58,548
-Bye-bye.
-Okay, here we go. Bye, girls.
171
00:06:58,635 --> 00:07:00,289
Okay. Oh, and remember,
there are extra diapers
in the closet
172
00:07:00,376 --> 00:07:02,247
-and make sure
you put her down by 7:00.
-Oh, look at that,
173
00:07:02,334 --> 00:07:04,075
Three hours
and 26 minutes now.
174
00:07:04,162 --> 00:07:05,686
-Bye. Call me.
-Bye. Okay. Bye.
175
00:07:05,773 --> 00:07:06,861
-Bye, Lilly.
-Call. No, we'll call you.
176
00:07:12,780 --> 00:07:13,911
[SNIFFING]
177
00:07:25,009 --> 00:07:26,228
[SNIFFING]
178
00:07:28,752 --> 00:07:29,710
What's that smell?
179
00:07:41,461 --> 00:07:42,462
Well...
180
00:07:44,986 --> 00:07:46,857
I would say that
181
00:07:46,944 --> 00:07:48,772
the baby just dropped
a diaper potato.
182
00:07:50,992 --> 00:07:51,993
Gross.
183
00:07:53,342 --> 00:07:54,778
Karen, relax.
184
00:07:54,865 --> 00:07:56,519
This is no big deal.
185
00:07:56,606 --> 00:07:58,913
One of us just takes
the baby upstairs
186
00:07:59,000 --> 00:08:00,480
and changes the diaper.
187
00:08:02,220 --> 00:08:03,221
Go ahead, Al.
188
00:08:05,528 --> 00:08:07,965
Me? Why do I have to do it?
189
00:08:09,097 --> 00:08:10,359
'Cause you're the youngest
190
00:08:10,446 --> 00:08:11,969
and majority rules.
191
00:08:12,056 --> 00:08:13,536
All in favor of Al changing
the baby, say aye.
192
00:08:13,623 --> 00:08:14,581
BOTH: Aye.
193
00:08:16,278 --> 00:08:18,019
Man, what a rip.
194
00:08:24,808 --> 00:08:25,853
[LILLY FUSSING]
195
00:08:26,941 --> 00:08:28,682
Oh, my God, it's green!
196
00:08:37,212 --> 00:08:39,475
-[IN A FRENCH ACCENT] Madame.
-Oh, thank you.
197
00:08:39,562 --> 00:08:41,259
-Monsieur.
-Yeah.
198
00:08:41,346 --> 00:08:42,739
How are you this evening?
199
00:08:42,826 --> 00:08:44,393
Well, we don't have
seven little brats
200
00:08:44,480 --> 00:08:46,656
hanging on us.
We're doing great.
[CHUCKLES]
201
00:08:46,743 --> 00:08:50,442
Bon.Pierre wants everything
to be absolument parfait.
202
00:08:50,530 --> 00:08:53,707
Especially for madame.
203
00:08:53,794 --> 00:08:56,971
Ooh. Viva la France.
[CHUCKLES]
204
00:08:57,058 --> 00:09:00,061
Uh, Pierre, how come
it's so quiet in here tonight?
205
00:09:00,148 --> 00:09:02,846
Ah, we have a, um,
little problem.
206
00:09:02,933 --> 00:09:04,805
The help, uh,
just went on strike.
207
00:09:04,892 --> 00:09:06,328
But do not worry.
208
00:09:06,415 --> 00:09:08,765
Pierre will make
this evening tres bon.
209
00:09:09,549 --> 00:09:10,550
Well...
210
00:09:10,637 --> 00:09:12,377
[MIMICKING FRENCH]
211
00:09:17,600 --> 00:09:19,559
Frank, I didn't know
you spoke French.
212
00:09:19,646 --> 00:09:21,038
Well...
213
00:09:21,125 --> 00:09:24,128
I want this evening
to be tres bon.
214
00:09:24,215 --> 00:09:25,869
-Oh, how romantic.
-[LAUGHS]
215
00:09:39,056 --> 00:09:41,493
Can, uh, we help you
with something?
216
00:09:41,581 --> 00:09:43,495
Yeah, you folks plan
on eating here tonight?
217
00:09:46,324 --> 00:09:48,892
Well, uh, yeah.
218
00:09:48,979 --> 00:09:50,764
Well, we're striking
this establishment
219
00:09:50,851 --> 00:09:53,027
for unfair business practices.
220
00:09:53,114 --> 00:09:54,985
We would appreciate it
if you would take
221
00:09:55,072 --> 00:09:57,031
your restaurant dollars
elsewhere.
222
00:09:59,337 --> 00:10:00,991
Well, Mister...
223
00:10:01,078 --> 00:10:02,514
Soupy.
224
00:10:02,602 --> 00:10:06,083
Mr. Soupy, I'm real sorry
about the strike
225
00:10:06,170 --> 00:10:08,303
but Pierre is a very nice man.
226
00:10:08,390 --> 00:10:10,218
Yeah, so come on.
Give us a break here,
can't you?
227
00:10:10,305 --> 00:10:12,307
I mean, I haven't been alone
with my wife in months.
228
00:10:12,394 --> 00:10:15,179
[CHUCKLES] We,
we have seven kids, huh?
229
00:10:15,266 --> 00:10:16,746
Yeah, well, we got kids too.
230
00:10:16,833 --> 00:10:18,443
And you strike breakers
are taking the food
231
00:10:18,530 --> 00:10:20,315
right out of their mouths.
232
00:10:20,402 --> 00:10:22,360
Hey, kids, come over here
and look at the people
233
00:10:22,447 --> 00:10:23,623
that are starving you
to death.
234
00:10:27,714 --> 00:10:30,412
Go ahead,
take a look at these faces
and then try and eat.
235
00:10:34,764 --> 00:10:36,723
-Come on, Frank.
Let's get out of here.
-Yeah, all right.
236
00:10:39,203 --> 00:10:40,509
Give me those.
237
00:10:40,596 --> 00:10:41,597
Go on, get back
on the picking line.
238
00:10:49,953 --> 00:10:52,390
KAREN: And then
Prince Charming who had
239
00:10:52,477 --> 00:10:54,349
gorgeous eyes like that
240
00:10:54,436 --> 00:10:56,568
tasty Val Kilmer
in Batman Forever...
[GIGGLES]
241
00:10:57,874 --> 00:11:00,224
...kissed Sleeping Beauty.
242
00:11:00,311 --> 00:11:01,965
Who had dark,
raven hair like me.
[GIGGLES]
243
00:11:03,663 --> 00:11:05,665
And Prince Charming
244
00:11:05,752 --> 00:11:08,450
whisked Sleeping Beauty
away to his castle
245
00:11:08,537 --> 00:11:09,843
where they drove
matching Beemers
246
00:11:09,930 --> 00:11:11,061
and lived happily ever after.
247
00:11:11,148 --> 00:11:12,236
[GIGGLES]
248
00:11:12,323 --> 00:11:13,324
The end.
249
00:11:15,370 --> 00:11:16,371
[SIGHS]
250
00:11:17,459 --> 00:11:21,898
Well, Lilly, as entertaining
251
00:11:21,985 --> 00:11:24,292
as that inane drivel
may have been,
252
00:11:26,033 --> 00:11:27,295
that is not the way
it happened.
253
00:11:29,427 --> 00:11:33,997
Sleeping Beauty was not
some hopeless,
254
00:11:34,084 --> 00:11:35,738
bubble-headed female.
255
00:11:35,825 --> 00:11:37,044
[GURGLING]
256
00:11:37,131 --> 00:11:38,654
DANA: No, no.
257
00:11:38,741 --> 00:11:42,005
She was an intelligent,
capable woman
258
00:11:42,092 --> 00:11:44,007
who chose to sleep alone
259
00:11:44,094 --> 00:11:46,009
rather than marry
some macho creep.
260
00:11:48,011 --> 00:11:51,014
Prince Charming, therefore,
261
00:11:51,101 --> 00:11:53,451
did not set her free
262
00:11:53,538 --> 00:11:57,542
but rather condemned her
to a life of
marital enslavement
263
00:11:59,370 --> 00:12:01,721
which male-dominated
society has perpetrated
264
00:12:01,808 --> 00:12:03,244
since the beginning of time.
265
00:12:05,333 --> 00:12:06,813
Where do you get this slop?
266
00:12:10,120 --> 00:12:11,252
Feminist Fairy Tales.
267
00:12:14,298 --> 00:12:15,865
It's a very important book.
268
00:12:18,868 --> 00:12:20,957
What's the difference?
The baby's asleep. Let's go.
269
00:12:28,356 --> 00:12:30,750
Wow. Getting her to sleep
was pretty easy.
270
00:12:30,837 --> 00:12:32,534
Of course, like I told Mom,
271
00:12:32,621 --> 00:12:34,579
any boob can
take care of a baby.
272
00:12:34,666 --> 00:12:36,277
[LILLY CRYING]
273
00:12:40,194 --> 00:12:41,282
Oh, nice going, boob.
274
00:12:43,284 --> 00:12:45,373
Relax, we're gonna
read her another story
275
00:12:45,460 --> 00:12:46,678
and she'll go
right back to sleep.
276
00:12:46,766 --> 00:12:48,115
[CRYING CONTINUES]
277
00:12:48,202 --> 00:12:49,464
[LOCK CLICKS]
278
00:12:49,551 --> 00:12:51,118
[DOOR RATTLING]
279
00:12:54,686 --> 00:12:57,341
Oh, my God.
We locked the baby
in the bedroom.
280
00:13:07,090 --> 00:13:08,352
All right, I see her.
281
00:13:08,439 --> 00:13:10,572
She's okay. She's chewing
on her foot.
282
00:13:12,052 --> 00:13:14,141
All right, this should do it.
283
00:13:23,280 --> 00:13:24,716
All right, give me a hammer.
284
00:13:24,804 --> 00:13:26,501
-No, Dana, come on...
-Just give me the hammer.
285
00:13:26,588 --> 00:13:27,850
-Dana, I'm telling you...
-Just give me it.
286
00:13:27,937 --> 00:13:29,025
We've got to get
the door open
287
00:13:29,112 --> 00:13:30,113
before Mom gets home.
288
00:13:30,200 --> 00:13:31,549
Okay, fine. You're crazy.
289
00:13:31,636 --> 00:13:32,986
[EXHALES] All right,
I'm just gonna...
290
00:13:33,073 --> 00:13:34,335
I have to try
and loosen it up.
291
00:13:43,344 --> 00:13:44,649
Oh, nice going, Bob Vila.
292
00:13:46,869 --> 00:13:48,088
Okay, okay.
293
00:13:48,175 --> 00:13:49,176
I called the fire department.
294
00:13:49,263 --> 00:13:50,220
They're on their way.
295
00:13:51,569 --> 00:13:54,355
Fire department? Karen!
296
00:13:54,442 --> 00:13:57,662
We do not need
men to help us.
297
00:13:57,749 --> 00:14:00,404
We are three strong women.
298
00:14:00,491 --> 00:14:03,233
We're capable
of handling this ourselves.
299
00:14:03,320 --> 00:14:05,322
[PHONE RINGING]
300
00:14:05,409 --> 00:14:07,324
-Hello?
-CAROL: Hi, honey.
301
00:14:07,411 --> 00:14:08,935
Oh, Mom,
I'm so glad you called.
302
00:14:09,022 --> 00:14:10,414
We have got a huge problem.
303
00:14:10,501 --> 00:14:12,112
Give me it!
304
00:14:12,199 --> 00:14:13,461
You speak, you die.
305
00:14:16,246 --> 00:14:18,118
Hi, Mom.
306
00:14:18,205 --> 00:14:21,382
Dana, what's going on?
What's the huge problem?
307
00:14:21,469 --> 00:14:23,732
Oh, you know Karen.
308
00:14:24,602 --> 00:14:25,603
Zits.
309
00:14:26,778 --> 00:14:28,258
So how's dinner?
310
00:14:28,345 --> 00:14:30,347
Oh, well, we had a little
trouble at the restaurant
311
00:14:30,434 --> 00:14:31,479
so we're going to
an early movie.
312
00:14:31,566 --> 00:14:32,567
How's the baby?
313
00:14:33,698 --> 00:14:34,917
-She's fine.
-[DOORBELL RINGS]
314
00:14:35,004 --> 00:14:36,310
[GASPS] That must be
the firemen.
315
00:14:38,051 --> 00:14:40,705
Firemen? Dana,
what's going on?
316
00:14:42,533 --> 00:14:43,883
We're watching Backdraft.
317
00:14:45,623 --> 00:14:46,973
You know the...
you know the... The movie
318
00:14:47,060 --> 00:14:49,192
with all the firemen
running around?
319
00:14:49,279 --> 00:14:52,021
Yeah, that William Baldwin
is such a hottie, huh?
320
00:14:52,979 --> 00:14:54,763
Um, Mom, I gotta go.
321
00:14:54,850 --> 00:14:56,591
All right, well,
call me if you need me.
322
00:14:56,678 --> 00:14:57,853
-Uh, will do.
-Bye.
323
00:14:57,940 --> 00:14:58,898
Bye.
324
00:15:00,421 --> 00:15:01,813
It's right over here.
[GIGGLES]
325
00:15:01,901 --> 00:15:02,902
[DANA SCOFFS]
326
00:15:03,859 --> 00:15:05,600
Oh, joy.
327
00:15:05,687 --> 00:15:09,734
Here come
the big strong firemen
to save the day.
328
00:15:09,821 --> 00:15:11,911
What're you gonna do?
Break down the door
with your ax?
329
00:15:13,347 --> 00:15:15,088
Nope. Got a screwdriver?
330
00:15:17,917 --> 00:15:18,918
Mmm.
331
00:15:19,962 --> 00:15:21,442
Let me save you some time.
332
00:15:21,529 --> 00:15:23,879
I tried that.
It does not work.
333
00:15:34,629 --> 00:15:37,371
[SCOFFS] Well, sure,
after I loosened it up
for 'em.
334
00:15:45,901 --> 00:15:47,381
Excuse us.
335
00:15:47,468 --> 00:15:49,426
Excuse us.
336
00:15:49,513 --> 00:15:51,341
Oh, this is
some romantic dinner.
337
00:15:53,561 --> 00:15:55,563
We've got two and a half hours
left on our date.
338
00:15:55,650 --> 00:15:57,739
Let's just relax
and enjoy the movie.
339
00:15:57,826 --> 00:15:58,827
Okay.
340
00:16:00,872 --> 00:16:02,048
[CLEARS THROAT]
341
00:16:02,135 --> 00:16:03,745
[MUSIC PLAYING OVER SPEAKERS]
342
00:16:03,832 --> 00:16:04,833
[COUGHS LOUDLY]
343
00:16:18,064 --> 00:16:19,456
[CONTINUES COUGHING]
344
00:16:23,634 --> 00:16:25,332
Frank, would you
tell him to be quiet?
345
00:16:25,419 --> 00:16:26,986
Well, honey,
he's coughing up a lung.
346
00:16:27,073 --> 00:16:28,422
I don't think
he's doing it on purpose.
347
00:16:29,684 --> 00:16:31,512
[COUGHS VIOLENTLY]
348
00:16:37,387 --> 00:16:39,911
MAN: [ON SCREEN]
We better head home.
Looks like rain.
349
00:16:39,999 --> 00:16:42,566
-What'd he say?
-Something about a train.
350
00:16:42,653 --> 00:16:45,656
A train? Nobody rides
a train anymore.
351
00:16:45,743 --> 00:16:47,919
WOMAN 1: Cousin Edna does.
She's afraid of flying.
352
00:16:49,356 --> 00:16:50,748
Isn't that Meg Ryan?
353
00:16:50,835 --> 00:16:52,446
I love her.
354
00:16:52,533 --> 00:16:54,578
Uh, she was in that movie.
355
00:16:54,665 --> 00:16:56,493
WOMAN 1: Mmm-hmm,
When Harry Met Sally.
356
00:16:56,580 --> 00:16:58,930
-[COUGHS]
-WOMAN 2: No, the other one.
357
00:17:00,236 --> 00:17:01,977
When A Man Loves A Woman?
358
00:17:02,064 --> 00:17:03,326
-[COUGHING CONTINUES]
-No, no.
359
00:17:03,413 --> 00:17:05,894
The one with,
what's his name?
360
00:17:05,981 --> 00:17:07,504
That Forrest Gumpguy?
361
00:17:07,591 --> 00:17:09,419
WOMAN 1: Oh, yeah.
What's the name of that movie?
362
00:17:09,506 --> 00:17:10,812
It's Sleepless in Seattle!
363
00:17:10,899 --> 00:17:12,248
[ALL SHUSHING]
364
00:17:14,207 --> 00:17:15,295
They started it.
365
00:17:24,652 --> 00:17:25,609
-Is this yours?
-No.
366
00:17:26,436 --> 00:17:27,394
You sure?
367
00:17:34,096 --> 00:17:35,489
See, this is nice.
368
00:17:35,576 --> 00:17:37,839
We're all alone on a lake
369
00:17:37,926 --> 00:17:40,189
on a beautiful night, hmm?
370
00:17:40,276 --> 00:17:42,061
Yeah, this is better
than a movie.
371
00:17:43,627 --> 00:17:46,500
And the following preview
has been approved
372
00:17:46,587 --> 00:17:49,242
for adult audiences only.
373
00:17:49,329 --> 00:17:50,373
[BOTH CHUCKLING]
374
00:17:57,424 --> 00:17:59,426
Frank! Wild animal.
375
00:17:59,513 --> 00:18:00,775
You ain't seen
nothing yet, honey.
376
00:18:00,862 --> 00:18:02,777
No, no, no, no,
Frank, outside.
377
00:18:03,865 --> 00:18:05,954
Love al fresco, okey-dokey.
378
00:18:06,041 --> 00:18:07,869
-[GROWLS]
-Ah, geez!
379
00:18:07,956 --> 00:18:09,827
-Honey, that's a bear.
-Duh!
380
00:18:09,914 --> 00:18:12,003
-Ahhh!
-Well, do something.
381
00:18:12,091 --> 00:18:13,788
-[STUTTERS] What?
-Well, scare it off!
382
00:18:13,875 --> 00:18:15,224
Shoo, bear!
383
00:18:15,311 --> 00:18:16,921
Shoo, go, bear.
Go, bear, shoo! No!
384
00:18:17,008 --> 00:18:18,227
-Oh, no.
-Not on my truck!
385
00:18:18,314 --> 00:18:21,143
I just waxed my truck. Geez.
386
00:18:21,230 --> 00:18:22,449
Oh, boy, this is perfect.
387
00:18:22,536 --> 00:18:24,799
Now the whole evening
is ruined.
388
00:18:24,886 --> 00:18:28,455
First, the Incredible Hulk
tells me I can't eat
in my favorite restaurant.
389
00:18:28,542 --> 00:18:31,675
Then Dr. Hawking Phlegm
blows lung butter
all over my hot dog
390
00:18:31,762 --> 00:18:34,200
and now I got a bear
using my truck
for an outhouse.
391
00:18:34,287 --> 00:18:36,202
Get out of here! God, geez!
392
00:18:36,289 --> 00:18:38,508
[LAUGHING]
393
00:18:40,206 --> 00:18:41,598
What are you laughing at?
394
00:18:42,730 --> 00:18:44,775
[CONTINUES LAUGHING]
395
00:18:44,862 --> 00:18:46,386
Well, yak it up, honey,
396
00:18:46,473 --> 00:18:47,909
'cause I hope you realize
397
00:18:47,996 --> 00:18:49,171
the next chance
you and I have to be alone
398
00:18:49,258 --> 00:18:50,955
is about the turn
of the century.
399
00:18:51,042 --> 00:18:53,741
Oh, Frank, I know we're
really desperate to be alone
400
00:18:53,828 --> 00:18:57,353
but sometimes things just
don't work out
like you planned.
401
00:18:57,440 --> 00:18:59,094
[GRUNTS]
402
00:18:59,181 --> 00:19:01,140
What are we gonna do?
There's a bear on our hood.
403
00:19:01,227 --> 00:19:03,142
[BOTH LAUGHING]
404
00:19:03,229 --> 00:19:06,057
-Are you still hungry?
-Yeah, I'm starving.
405
00:19:06,145 --> 00:19:08,147
Well, let's see
what I can do here.
406
00:19:11,062 --> 00:19:13,587
Hey, Tony? Yeah,
Frank Lambert here.
407
00:19:13,674 --> 00:19:14,892
I'd like to order a pizza,
408
00:19:14,979 --> 00:19:16,677
a number three
with extra cheese.
409
00:19:16,764 --> 00:19:17,895
You're gonna
have to deliver it
410
00:19:17,982 --> 00:19:20,028
up here to Blue Ridge Lake.
411
00:19:20,115 --> 00:19:22,596
I'll be the only truck
with a bear on the hood.
412
00:19:28,384 --> 00:19:29,777
The point is,
the reason there aren't
413
00:19:29,864 --> 00:19:31,257
more female firefighters
414
00:19:31,344 --> 00:19:33,346
is that men are still
stereotyping us
415
00:19:33,433 --> 00:19:36,436
as docile, domesticated,
416
00:19:36,523 --> 00:19:38,089
subservient creatures.
417
00:19:38,177 --> 00:19:39,178
More iced tea?
418
00:19:40,657 --> 00:19:42,181
[CHUCKLES] Uh, no, no.
419
00:19:42,268 --> 00:19:44,966
Uh, we really should get back
to the station.
420
00:19:45,053 --> 00:19:46,576
Mayday. Dad and Carol
just pulled up.
421
00:19:46,663 --> 00:19:48,796
All right, everybody, out.
Out, out, out, out.
422
00:19:48,883 --> 00:19:50,406
Oh, I get it, I get it.
423
00:19:50,493 --> 00:19:51,755
You don't want your mom
to know you screwed up
424
00:19:51,842 --> 00:19:52,930
and locked the baby
in the bedroom.
425
00:19:53,017 --> 00:19:54,018
Move it, fire boy!
426
00:19:57,587 --> 00:19:58,545
Girls.
427
00:20:00,764 --> 00:20:02,810
Mom.
428
00:20:02,897 --> 00:20:04,812
So is everything okay
with the baby?
429
00:20:05,595 --> 00:20:07,728
Wonderful.
430
00:20:07,815 --> 00:20:11,340
Like I say, taking care
of babies is a breeze.
431
00:20:11,427 --> 00:20:12,646
Oh, well then,
maybe you'd like to explain
432
00:20:12,733 --> 00:20:15,214
why there is a firetruck
parked out front.
433
00:20:21,089 --> 00:20:22,133
I can explain the firetruck.
434
00:20:22,221 --> 00:20:23,222
You don't have to.
435
00:20:24,745 --> 00:20:27,617
The man driving
the firetruck just did.
436
00:20:27,704 --> 00:20:29,228
So is there anything that
437
00:20:29,315 --> 00:20:30,968
you would like to say to me?
438
00:20:31,055 --> 00:20:32,448
Hmm? Hmm? Hmm?
439
00:20:32,535 --> 00:20:34,233
Come on, say the words.
Say the words.
440
00:20:34,320 --> 00:20:37,453
Taking care...
441
00:20:37,540 --> 00:20:39,716
Of a baby is harder
than I thought.
442
00:20:39,803 --> 00:20:40,804
Thank you.
443
00:20:41,936 --> 00:20:42,937
Goodnight, girls.
444
00:20:48,682 --> 00:20:49,900
I hate it when she's right.
445
00:20:52,251 --> 00:20:54,340
Who cares? I've got a date
with a fireman.
446
00:20:54,427 --> 00:20:55,384
[LAUGHS]
447
00:21:00,824 --> 00:21:02,217
Well, there it is.
448
00:21:02,304 --> 00:21:04,001
The last of my worldly
possessions, huh?
449
00:21:04,088 --> 00:21:05,699
[CHUCKLES]
Now I'm just looking
450
00:21:05,786 --> 00:21:07,396
for that stairway to Heaven.
451
00:21:07,483 --> 00:21:09,442
-Thanks a lot, man.
-Totally.
452
00:21:09,529 --> 00:21:11,618
[LAUGHS] Phew.
453
00:21:11,705 --> 00:21:14,360
"Death, be not proud."
454
00:21:14,447 --> 00:21:16,536
Cody, where's that guy going
with all your stuff?
455
00:21:16,623 --> 00:21:17,624
Well, the way I figured,
456
00:21:17,711 --> 00:21:18,886
I won't be needing it anymore.
457
00:21:18,973 --> 00:21:20,844
I mean, hey, what good's
a matching set
458
00:21:20,931 --> 00:21:22,498
of Elvis glasses
when you're dead?
459
00:21:24,283 --> 00:21:27,590
Cody, great news,
you're alive.
460
00:21:27,677 --> 00:21:29,288
Don't toy with me, dude.
461
00:21:30,854 --> 00:21:32,639
It's in the paper.
462
00:21:32,726 --> 00:21:34,641
They did a follow-up article
on the Cody Lambert that died.
463
00:21:34,728 --> 00:21:37,470
Apparently, he was some
big war hero in World War I.
464
00:21:37,557 --> 00:21:39,123
World War I?
How old was he?
465
00:21:39,210 --> 00:21:41,038
Hundred and sixteen.
466
00:21:41,125 --> 00:21:42,953
They even have
a picture of him.
467
00:21:43,040 --> 00:21:45,391
Give me...
Well, hey, that's not me.
468
00:21:45,478 --> 00:21:47,436
[LAUGHS] Wow, man.
469
00:21:47,523 --> 00:21:49,743
Dude, I'm still alive!
470
00:21:49,830 --> 00:21:51,919
Wow! I can sing,
I can dance.
471
00:21:52,006 --> 00:21:53,050
I can play my guitar!
472
00:21:53,137 --> 00:21:54,138
Right...
473
00:21:54,225 --> 00:21:55,226
Uh-oh.
474
00:21:56,315 --> 00:21:57,316
I need my guitar back!
33328
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