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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,870 --> 00:00:03,699 [UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING] 2 00:00:03,786 --> 00:00:07,616 Yeah, well, you see, the thing is, I think that I'm going into labor. 3 00:00:07,703 --> 00:00:10,662 Are you sure that you can't find Frank anywhere on the construction site? 4 00:00:10,749 --> 00:00:14,797 [SIGHING] Well, he got a new fishing magazine. Have you checked the Porta-potty? 5 00:00:16,190 --> 00:00:18,409 Thanks. [BREATHING HEAVILY] 6 00:00:18,496 --> 00:00:21,586 Well, if you find him, please tell him to call home immediately. Okay? 7 00:00:21,673 --> 00:00:24,763 Thanks. [SIGHING IN EXHAUSTION] 8 00:00:24,850 --> 00:00:28,158 -Hey, Carol. -Oh, Cody, Cody, I need your help. 9 00:00:28,245 --> 00:00:30,682 I can't find Frank and I think I'm having the baby. 10 00:00:30,769 --> 00:00:33,076 Oh, the baby? The baby? 11 00:00:33,163 --> 00:00:36,036 Now? Oh, my God! Oh, my God! 12 00:00:36,123 --> 00:00:38,908 -Whoa! Dude, dude. -What's going on? 13 00:00:38,995 --> 00:00:41,476 Dude! Dude! Baby! Baby! Oh, my God! 14 00:00:41,563 --> 00:00:43,043 [PANTING HEAVILY] 15 00:00:43,130 --> 00:00:45,871 Mayday! Mayday! Baby alert! Whoa! 16 00:00:45,958 --> 00:00:48,265 Cody, what's going on? Is Mom going into labor? 17 00:00:48,352 --> 00:00:53,009 Yeah, buddy. Hey, I'll boil the water. You go fetch a midwife. 18 00:00:53,096 --> 00:00:55,794 Cody, Cody, calm down, this isn't, "Little House on the Prairie." 19 00:00:55,881 --> 00:00:59,494 We'll just... We'll get her in the car and we'll get her to the hospital. 20 00:00:59,581 --> 00:01:02,279 The hospital. Yeah, good idea. 21 00:01:02,366 --> 00:01:05,326 They're used to handling this kind of stuff. Okay. 22 00:01:05,413 --> 00:01:07,067 DANA: Mom! 23 00:01:07,154 --> 00:01:09,721 -Are you okay? -Yes, it wasn't labor. 24 00:01:09,808 --> 00:01:11,767 It was just... gas. 25 00:01:13,551 --> 00:01:15,249 Gas? 26 00:01:15,336 --> 00:01:17,164 Whoa, man! 27 00:01:17,251 --> 00:01:20,558 You mean this whole thing's like just one big giant gas bubble? 28 00:01:21,777 --> 00:01:24,432 Dude, clear the runway, man. 29 00:01:24,519 --> 00:01:26,651 When that sucker goes off, it's gonna be lethal. 30 00:01:27,609 --> 00:01:28,958 Oh, man. 31 00:01:31,134 --> 00:01:35,095 [THEME SONG PLAYING] 32 00:01:36,487 --> 00:01:38,272 MAN: ♪ The dream got broken 33 00:01:38,359 --> 00:01:40,187 ♪ Seemed like all was lost 34 00:01:40,274 --> 00:01:42,014 ♪ What would be the future? 35 00:01:42,102 --> 00:01:43,842 ♪ Could you pay the cost? 36 00:01:43,929 --> 00:01:46,497 ♪ You wonder Will there ever be 37 00:01:46,584 --> 00:01:48,891 ♪ A second time around? 38 00:01:50,197 --> 00:01:51,981 WOMAN: ♪ Woah-a, woah-a 39 00:01:52,068 --> 00:01:53,722 ♪ When the tears are over 40 00:01:53,809 --> 00:01:55,811 ♪ And the moment has come 41 00:01:55,898 --> 00:01:59,597 ♪ Say, "My Lord I think I found someone" 42 00:01:59,684 --> 00:02:01,425 ♪ You know it will be better 43 00:02:01,512 --> 00:02:02,948 ♪ 'Cause you're putting it together 44 00:02:03,035 --> 00:02:05,995 ♪ For the second time around 45 00:02:12,001 --> 00:02:15,135 ALL: ♪ Step by step, day by day 46 00:02:15,222 --> 00:02:17,093 WOMAN: ♪ Day by day 47 00:02:17,180 --> 00:02:19,530 ALL: ♪ A fresh start over A different hand to play 48 00:02:19,617 --> 00:02:21,358 ♪ The deeper we fall 49 00:02:21,445 --> 00:02:23,621 ♪ The stronger we stay 50 00:02:23,708 --> 00:02:25,841 WOMAN: ♪ We'll make it better 51 00:02:25,928 --> 00:02:27,886 MAN: ♪ Second time around ♪ 52 00:02:38,027 --> 00:02:39,985 [CHUCKLING] 53 00:02:40,072 --> 00:02:41,987 [MIMICS STAR TREK COMMUNICATOR] 54 00:02:42,074 --> 00:02:43,424 [MIMICS CAPTAIN KIRK] Kirk to Enterprise. 55 00:02:45,165 --> 00:02:48,342 Come in Enterprise. Scotty, I need more power... 56 00:02:49,430 --> 00:02:52,128 And I need it now! 57 00:02:52,215 --> 00:02:55,087 [MIMICS SCOTTY] Cap'n, I got it at warp factor eight now. 58 00:02:55,175 --> 00:02:58,221 If I give her any more, she'll blow! [MIMICS ROBOTIC SOUND] 59 00:02:59,004 --> 00:03:00,745 Yes, okay. 60 00:03:00,832 --> 00:03:02,051 -Hey, cool phone. Can I use it? -Hey, hey, wait a minute. 61 00:03:02,138 --> 00:03:03,966 Son, this is not a toy. 62 00:03:06,186 --> 00:03:07,796 Yeah, right, Captain Kirk. 63 00:03:10,059 --> 00:03:13,018 JT, this phone has one purpose only. 64 00:03:13,105 --> 00:03:14,933 It's so if Carol goes into labor, 65 00:03:15,020 --> 00:03:17,284 she can reach me wherever I am. 66 00:03:17,371 --> 00:03:19,721 Well, can't they just put a phone in the Porta-potty for you? 67 00:03:22,158 --> 00:03:25,117 Probably not. It took me three months just to get a reading light in there. 68 00:03:29,034 --> 00:03:30,166 -Hey, Dad. -Yeah. 69 00:03:30,253 --> 00:03:32,255 -I have got great news. -What? 70 00:03:32,342 --> 00:03:34,518 -Okay, my friend, Kelly-- -Yeah? 71 00:03:34,605 --> 00:03:36,172 Is going to Disneyland this summer and her parents said I could go too, 72 00:03:36,259 --> 00:03:38,174 if I could come up with 500 bucks for the airfare. 73 00:03:38,261 --> 00:03:39,915 -Oh, that is good news. -Yeah. 74 00:03:40,002 --> 00:03:42,309 -So anyway, I need a favor. -No, you can't have $500. 75 00:03:43,658 --> 00:03:44,746 Why not? 76 00:03:45,616 --> 00:03:47,531 Don't you love me? 77 00:03:47,618 --> 00:03:50,839 Not 500 dollars worth. 78 00:03:50,926 --> 00:03:53,668 He doesn't even love me enough to let me use the flip-phone. 79 00:03:53,755 --> 00:03:56,714 Al, if you need money, why don't you go get a job? 80 00:03:56,801 --> 00:03:58,499 I tried. There aren't any. 81 00:03:58,586 --> 00:04:00,718 Well, how about... I don't know... babysitting? 82 00:04:00,805 --> 00:04:03,025 [SCOFFS] Oh, great, Dad. 83 00:04:03,112 --> 00:04:06,202 Three bucks an hour, I should make it to Disneyland by the time I'm 80. 84 00:04:06,289 --> 00:04:08,248 I'll go on the Teacups, my teeth will fly out. 85 00:04:09,945 --> 00:04:11,860 Listen, Al, if you want money, 86 00:04:11,947 --> 00:04:14,166 you're gonna have to earn it the hard way just like the rest of us. 87 00:04:14,254 --> 00:04:16,734 There's no such thing as easy money. 88 00:04:16,821 --> 00:04:18,475 -One last pitch. -Oh... 89 00:04:18,562 --> 00:04:21,130 Huh? How about... an advance on my inheritance? 90 00:04:24,438 --> 00:04:26,701 Oh, that's funny. Inheritance? 91 00:04:26,788 --> 00:04:30,661 Al, I'm a construction worker. I've got six kids and one in the oven. 92 00:04:30,748 --> 00:04:32,707 We're watering-down ketchup as it is. 93 00:04:33,882 --> 00:04:35,492 Inheritance! That's so cute. 94 00:04:40,323 --> 00:04:41,977 Man, he is so cheap. 95 00:04:44,066 --> 00:04:46,155 [SIGHS] Forget about him, Al. 96 00:04:46,242 --> 00:04:47,678 I got a plan. 97 00:04:47,765 --> 00:04:50,507 And it's gonna make us a ton of money. 98 00:04:50,594 --> 00:04:51,813 Really? How? 99 00:04:52,901 --> 00:04:54,119 Babysitting. 100 00:04:56,252 --> 00:05:00,125 Attention, moron, you cannot make money babysitting. 101 00:05:00,212 --> 00:05:02,606 Not if you babysit one kid... 102 00:05:02,693 --> 00:05:04,434 But what if you go for volume? 103 00:05:04,521 --> 00:05:08,438 Okay, ten kids, at three bucks an hour, times four hours. 104 00:05:08,525 --> 00:05:11,876 That's... a whole lot of money. 105 00:05:14,052 --> 00:05:16,272 Yeah, well, how am I supposed to babysit for ten kids? 106 00:05:16,359 --> 00:05:18,709 Easy. We'll do it together and split the money. 107 00:05:18,796 --> 00:05:20,755 How hard can it be to handle a bunch of kids? 108 00:05:22,322 --> 00:05:24,933 AL: It could work. J.T: Of course it'll work. 109 00:05:25,020 --> 00:05:28,850 Okay, Dad and Carol aren't going to be home this Friday. We'll do it. What do you say? 110 00:05:28,937 --> 00:05:31,200 I say, "I'm going to Disneyland." 111 00:05:31,287 --> 00:05:32,375 Yeah, buddy. 112 00:05:39,513 --> 00:05:42,080 Karen, we've been shopping for three hours. 113 00:05:42,167 --> 00:05:45,257 Haven't you found a prom dress that you like yet? 114 00:05:45,345 --> 00:05:46,998 KAREN: Mom, are you in a hurry or something? 115 00:05:47,085 --> 00:05:50,045 Oh, no, no, no, no, no. I'm just eight months pregnant, 116 00:05:50,132 --> 00:05:52,047 been on my feet since seven a.m., 117 00:05:52,134 --> 00:05:53,918 but, uh, you take your time, honey. 118 00:05:54,005 --> 00:05:55,703 I'll let you know if my water breaks. 119 00:05:56,921 --> 00:05:58,445 How are we doing over here? 120 00:05:58,532 --> 00:06:00,490 Well, all of these are rejects. 121 00:06:00,577 --> 00:06:04,494 Well, it takes some time to find the perfect prom dress. 122 00:06:04,581 --> 00:06:08,237 Yeah, well, it took less time to build The Great Wall of China. 123 00:06:15,331 --> 00:06:16,854 What do you think? 124 00:06:16,941 --> 00:06:19,161 Wow, that's sexy. 125 00:06:19,248 --> 00:06:20,902 [SALESWOMAN CHUCKLES] CAROL: We may need a jacket. 126 00:06:22,904 --> 00:06:24,775 I don't know... 127 00:06:24,862 --> 00:06:26,211 It's a good first impression dress. 128 00:06:26,298 --> 00:06:28,300 I can definitely hear the "wows." 129 00:06:28,388 --> 00:06:30,999 But, I don't know if it has any staying power. 130 00:06:31,086 --> 00:06:33,697 I mean, what's this dress going to look like at midnight? 131 00:06:33,784 --> 00:06:36,874 Well, if you don't make up your mind soon, we may find out. 132 00:06:38,659 --> 00:06:41,096 Mother, this prom means a lot to me. 133 00:06:41,183 --> 00:06:43,838 My date is a very special guy. 134 00:06:43,925 --> 00:06:46,101 I really think I could end up marrying him. 135 00:06:46,188 --> 00:06:47,929 Marrying him? 136 00:06:48,016 --> 00:06:50,497 I've never even heard you talk about him. What's his name? 137 00:06:50,584 --> 00:06:52,194 -Brad. -Brad what? 138 00:06:52,281 --> 00:06:55,153 [SCOFFS] I don't know. I just met him yesterday. 139 00:07:01,116 --> 00:07:02,900 [PHONE RINGING] 140 00:07:02,987 --> 00:07:05,990 Oh, yes. Her baby hotline! 141 00:07:18,568 --> 00:07:20,396 Honey, it's me. Hi, yeah... 142 00:07:21,223 --> 00:07:22,790 J.T? 143 00:07:22,877 --> 00:07:25,227 J.T, I told you never to call me on this phone. 144 00:07:25,314 --> 00:07:27,055 [STAMMERS] I'm sorry, son, I'm sorry. 145 00:07:27,142 --> 00:07:29,797 I didn't know it was an emergency. What is it? 146 00:07:31,668 --> 00:07:34,236 No, I do not know where the TV remote is. 147 00:07:36,325 --> 00:07:38,240 JT... 148 00:07:38,327 --> 00:07:40,547 Listen to me very carefully. 149 00:07:40,634 --> 00:07:43,463 If you call me again, I'll have you killed. 150 00:07:44,899 --> 00:07:45,856 Love 'ya. 151 00:07:48,337 --> 00:07:50,513 -Hey, Uncle Frank. Hey... -Hey, Code. 152 00:07:50,600 --> 00:07:52,602 -I got that molding you wanted. -Aw, thanks, thanks. 153 00:07:52,689 --> 00:07:54,952 Yeah. Hey, dude. 154 00:07:55,039 --> 00:07:57,607 I sent a couple guys down on a lumber run, you know, and I told them that 155 00:07:57,694 --> 00:08:01,437 since they'd be cruising right by the hardware store, to pick up that PVC pipe we needed. 156 00:08:01,524 --> 00:08:03,526 Hey, Mr. Lambert, you were right. 157 00:08:03,613 --> 00:08:05,702 The, uh, first floor bathroom was right where you said it was. 158 00:08:06,790 --> 00:08:08,226 It was on the first floor. 159 00:08:09,967 --> 00:08:12,535 I've been in construction a lot-of years, Dave. 160 00:08:12,622 --> 00:08:13,580 Cool. 161 00:08:14,885 --> 00:08:16,844 [WHISTLES] Whoa. 162 00:08:16,931 --> 00:08:20,238 Yeah. Anyway, Cody, listen, you've been doing such a great job for me, 163 00:08:20,325 --> 00:08:23,154 that I've decided to, uh, make you my foreman. 164 00:08:23,807 --> 00:08:25,722 Foreman? 165 00:08:25,809 --> 00:08:27,985 Dude, you messing with my head? 166 00:08:28,072 --> 00:08:31,859 No, no. I mean it. It will really help me out, okay. 167 00:08:31,946 --> 00:08:34,383 I mean, when the baby comes, I'm gonna want to spend more time at home. 168 00:08:34,470 --> 00:08:36,385 And that way, you can cover for me. 169 00:08:36,472 --> 00:08:38,605 Whoa, raging, huh? 170 00:08:38,692 --> 00:08:40,258 The Code-man as the Fore-man. 171 00:08:40,345 --> 00:08:43,392 Yeah, dude. Yeah,, buddy. 172 00:08:43,479 --> 00:08:47,309 Yeah, the lead dog, the head honcho, el burrito supreme-o. 173 00:08:49,398 --> 00:08:52,836 Listen, one of your first jobs as foreman is 174 00:08:52,923 --> 00:08:56,797 to uh, go over there and tell the new guy, Dave, to speed up his work a little bit. Okay? 175 00:08:56,884 --> 00:09:01,236 And also tell him to put those nails a little closer together on the casing, huh? 176 00:09:01,323 --> 00:09:04,892 Wow, man, uh, you mean, I got to tell people what to do, Uncle Frank? 177 00:09:04,979 --> 00:09:08,591 Doesn't that seem kind of bossy? 178 00:09:08,678 --> 00:09:11,420 Cody, you're the foreman. That means you're the boss. 179 00:09:11,507 --> 00:09:13,944 Yeah, I know. But, I always thought it kind of just meant 180 00:09:14,031 --> 00:09:15,293 you got to drive the big truck. 181 00:09:15,380 --> 00:09:18,340 Yeah... [MIMICS ENGINE REVVING] 182 00:09:19,341 --> 00:09:21,473 Okay, I'll give it a shot. 183 00:09:21,561 --> 00:09:23,171 [LAUGHS AND GROANS NERVOUSLY] 184 00:09:26,043 --> 00:09:28,306 [CODY EXHALES] 185 00:09:28,393 --> 00:09:30,526 -Hey, dude. Hey. -Hey. 186 00:09:32,920 --> 00:09:34,182 [CLEARS THROAT] 187 00:09:35,183 --> 00:09:37,577 Hey, Dave, dude. I'm Cody. 188 00:09:38,360 --> 00:09:40,014 The new foreman. 189 00:09:40,101 --> 00:09:42,494 -Hey, congratulations. -Hey, thanks, man. 190 00:09:42,582 --> 00:09:44,496 Hey, listen. I just wanted to tell you, you know, 191 00:09:44,584 --> 00:09:46,368 you're doing a totally awesome job over here, you know. 192 00:09:46,455 --> 00:09:48,457 Oh, thanks. 193 00:09:48,544 --> 00:09:51,329 But if there is any way you can, kind of like, speed it up a little bit 194 00:09:51,416 --> 00:09:54,245 and, like, put those nails just a little bit closer together, 195 00:09:54,332 --> 00:09:56,508 so like, the door casing doesn't fall off the wall. 196 00:09:56,596 --> 00:09:58,815 You know, uh, that'd be totally cool. 197 00:09:58,902 --> 00:10:01,339 -It's easier this way. -Uh, that's cool, too. 198 00:10:06,649 --> 00:10:08,912 [SIGHING] 199 00:10:08,999 --> 00:10:11,741 Man, I don't know if I can keep coming down on guys like this, you know. 200 00:10:19,270 --> 00:10:21,185 Hey, the kids are going to be here any minute. 201 00:10:21,272 --> 00:10:25,102 Any chance you can get off your fat butt and help me? 202 00:10:25,189 --> 00:10:27,714 Al, what's there to do? We just stick 'em in front of the TV, 203 00:10:27,801 --> 00:10:30,717 stuff 'em full of candy, and four hours later, we're rich. 204 00:10:30,804 --> 00:10:32,457 [DOORBELL RINGS] 205 00:10:32,544 --> 00:10:34,198 All right. Bring on the bucks. 206 00:10:36,157 --> 00:10:38,768 KID 1: Stop it! KID 2: Just stop! 207 00:10:38,855 --> 00:10:40,857 MRS. WEBER: Stop it! Kids, stop it! KIDS: Stop! Stop! 208 00:10:40,944 --> 00:10:44,078 -Stop it. Stop it! -CLAIRE AND JOHN: Stop! Stop! Stop! 209 00:10:44,165 --> 00:10:46,646 [BREATHING HEAVILY] 210 00:10:47,429 --> 00:10:48,822 Hello, JT. 211 00:10:48,909 --> 00:10:50,737 -Hi, Mrs. Weber. -[MRS. WEBER SIGHS] 212 00:10:50,824 --> 00:10:54,044 And look at this, it's the lovely Weber children. 213 00:10:54,131 --> 00:10:55,132 Yeah, whatever. 214 00:10:55,219 --> 00:10:57,265 [SIGHING IN EXHAUSTION] 215 00:10:57,352 --> 00:10:58,614 I'll pick 'em up at ten. 216 00:11:03,358 --> 00:11:04,359 Hi... 217 00:11:05,926 --> 00:11:07,710 -Hi, kids. -You're ugly. 218 00:11:10,147 --> 00:11:12,541 Well, aren't you just a precious little thing, huh? 219 00:11:14,456 --> 00:11:17,851 Hey, I'm Al. I'll be sitting with JT. 220 00:11:17,938 --> 00:11:20,505 Hello, hot lips! 221 00:11:22,812 --> 00:11:25,032 -Hey. -Where have you been all my life? 222 00:11:26,468 --> 00:11:28,209 Excuse me? 223 00:11:28,296 --> 00:11:31,429 I think you and me could make beautiful music together. 224 00:11:33,301 --> 00:11:35,607 I think you need some ice down your pants. 225 00:11:36,870 --> 00:11:38,480 Whatever turns you on, babe. 226 00:11:41,483 --> 00:11:44,225 Okay, kids, who wants candy? 227 00:11:44,312 --> 00:11:46,096 -I do, I do. -I want candy. 228 00:11:46,183 --> 00:11:47,707 Okay, follow me. 229 00:11:49,883 --> 00:11:51,319 I'm He-Man. 230 00:11:54,061 --> 00:11:56,367 You better cut that out or you'll be " She" Man. 231 00:12:00,632 --> 00:12:03,897 Finally. We're alone. 232 00:12:03,984 --> 00:12:06,900 Why don't you uh, pour us a drink 233 00:12:06,987 --> 00:12:08,989 and we'll get to uh, know each other. 234 00:12:12,166 --> 00:12:15,038 Listen here, you little pervert... 235 00:12:15,125 --> 00:12:20,130 I'm in high school and you're still wearing cartoon underpants. 236 00:12:20,217 --> 00:12:23,873 So can the hoochie-coochie talk or I'll take you to the vet and have you fixed. 237 00:12:25,266 --> 00:12:28,138 Ooh, you are a feisty one. 238 00:12:29,313 --> 00:12:30,619 [DOORBELL RINGS] 239 00:12:30,706 --> 00:12:31,925 Sit down! 240 00:12:38,801 --> 00:12:41,325 Is this JT's Babysitting Service? 241 00:12:41,412 --> 00:12:42,413 Yeah. 242 00:12:43,197 --> 00:12:44,415 [WHISTLES] 243 00:12:44,502 --> 00:12:46,330 Okay, kids, this is the place. 244 00:12:46,417 --> 00:12:47,941 Everybody out of the bus. 245 00:12:48,028 --> 00:12:49,943 [CHILDREN SCREAMING] Bus? 246 00:12:50,030 --> 00:12:53,076 Church kids. Very well behaved. 247 00:12:53,163 --> 00:12:56,166 [CHILDREN SCREAMING] 248 00:13:00,040 --> 00:13:03,260 I wouldn't give them any more sugar. 249 00:13:03,347 --> 00:13:07,264 Here's their names, phone numbers. Good luck. 250 00:13:07,351 --> 00:13:09,049 Where are you going? 251 00:13:09,136 --> 00:13:11,878 I've been with these kids since dawn. I need a drink. 252 00:13:16,491 --> 00:13:20,408 [CHILDREN SCREAMING] 253 00:13:20,495 --> 00:13:22,497 This is not good. 254 00:13:26,849 --> 00:13:28,111 Okay. I love you. Bye. 255 00:13:28,198 --> 00:13:30,200 All right there, Lambert. 256 00:13:30,287 --> 00:13:32,812 No personal phone calls during working hours. You know that. 257 00:13:32,899 --> 00:13:36,206 [LAUGHS] Too tough? 258 00:13:36,293 --> 00:13:40,036 No, Cody. As a matter of fact, sometimes you've got to be tough to get the job done. 259 00:13:41,603 --> 00:13:44,519 [WINDOW PANEL CRASHING] 260 00:13:54,398 --> 00:13:58,315 As a matter of fact, Cody, I think you're gonna have to be tougher with the new guy. 261 00:13:58,402 --> 00:14:00,013 He hasn't done a thing right all day. 262 00:14:00,100 --> 00:14:02,015 Yeah. So what do you want me to do? 263 00:14:02,102 --> 00:14:05,714 Like, uh, go over there and, like, give him a real disapproving sigh? 264 00:14:05,801 --> 00:14:07,194 [SIGHING DISAPPROVAL] 265 00:14:08,804 --> 00:14:11,720 No, I want you to go over there and fire him. 266 00:14:11,807 --> 00:14:13,200 Fire him? 267 00:14:13,287 --> 00:14:15,811 Oh, dude. I don't know if I can do that. 268 00:14:15,898 --> 00:14:19,815 Okay, listen, how about if I give him a sigh and a really gnarly scowl. 269 00:14:19,902 --> 00:14:21,251 [SIGHING AND SCOWLING] 270 00:14:21,338 --> 00:14:23,906 Cody! We have a schedule to keep here. 271 00:14:23,993 --> 00:14:26,517 We can't afford to correct his mistakes all the time. 272 00:14:26,604 --> 00:14:30,347 Now I want you to get tough, go over there, and fire him. 273 00:14:30,434 --> 00:14:34,003 All right. Heavy is the butt that wears the crown, huh? 274 00:14:36,440 --> 00:14:39,574 -[SIGHS DEEPLY] Hey, Dave. -Hey. 275 00:14:39,661 --> 00:14:42,664 Remember me? El burrito supreme-o, huh? 276 00:14:42,751 --> 00:14:46,363 -Yeah. How's it going? -Yeah. You know, funny you should mention "going." 277 00:14:46,450 --> 00:14:48,278 [INHALES SHARPLY] Yeah. 278 00:14:48,365 --> 00:14:50,019 You know how sometimes you like wake up in the morning 279 00:14:50,106 --> 00:14:52,543 and you just don't feel like going to work? 280 00:14:52,630 --> 00:14:54,197 Yeah, I sure do. 281 00:14:54,284 --> 00:14:56,721 All right, from now on, go with that feeling. 282 00:14:59,463 --> 00:15:01,335 Wait. Are you saying I'm fired? 283 00:15:01,422 --> 00:15:03,380 Yeah, but I like the way you say it a lot better. 284 00:15:05,817 --> 00:15:08,516 Oh, man, I'm really sorry to hear that. 285 00:15:08,603 --> 00:15:10,605 I mean, I don't want to burden you with my problems 286 00:15:10,692 --> 00:15:12,912 or anything, but I've got five kids. 287 00:15:12,999 --> 00:15:16,263 You know, two of them need braces, and one of them needs an operation, 288 00:15:16,350 --> 00:15:19,440 and my wife just told me this morning, she's expecting twins. 289 00:15:19,527 --> 00:15:22,225 Twins? Whoa, dude... 290 00:15:22,312 --> 00:15:24,793 Sounds like your life's going around the bowl and down the hole. 291 00:15:26,012 --> 00:15:27,970 Oh, man. 292 00:15:28,057 --> 00:15:30,320 I'll tell you what, man. Why don't you just like grab a seat right here 293 00:15:30,407 --> 00:15:32,496 and, uh, I'll go see if I can save your job. 294 00:15:32,583 --> 00:15:34,759 -Cool. I'll take a break. -Yeah, dude. 295 00:15:34,846 --> 00:15:38,459 Whoa. Whew... Man! 296 00:15:38,546 --> 00:15:40,635 Well, did you fire him? 297 00:15:40,722 --> 00:15:43,768 Yeah, Uncle Frank, man. I couldn't give him the old heave-ho. 298 00:15:43,855 --> 00:15:45,770 Did you know his kids are sick? 299 00:15:45,857 --> 00:15:48,948 Yeah. And his wife's expecting twins. Dude... 300 00:15:49,035 --> 00:15:52,168 Cody, Dave isn't even married. 301 00:15:52,255 --> 00:15:54,910 He just told you that sob story so he could keep his job. 302 00:15:54,997 --> 00:15:58,174 [GASPS] You mean, he lied to me? 303 00:15:59,654 --> 00:16:01,482 Yes, he lied to you. 304 00:16:01,569 --> 00:16:03,875 Whoa! 305 00:16:03,963 --> 00:16:07,618 Liar, liar, pants on fire. 306 00:16:07,705 --> 00:16:11,231 You slung me the bull and now you're fired. 307 00:16:11,318 --> 00:16:14,147 -You saying I'm fired again? -That's right. 308 00:16:14,234 --> 00:16:16,323 But this time, I mean it. 309 00:16:16,410 --> 00:16:18,151 You're fired. Hit the bricks. 310 00:16:18,238 --> 00:16:20,457 Don't let the door hit 'ya where the good Lord split'ya. 311 00:16:24,461 --> 00:16:26,986 Dude... 312 00:16:27,073 --> 00:16:30,293 Boy, I know he deserved it, man, but that's got to be the toughest thing I ever did. 313 00:16:30,380 --> 00:16:32,992 Oh, man, that feels terrible. 314 00:16:33,079 --> 00:16:36,604 Well, Cody, you shouldn't. I mean, you did what needed to be done. 315 00:16:36,691 --> 00:16:37,953 CODY: Really? FRANK: Yeah. 316 00:16:38,040 --> 00:16:39,520 -You feel okay about it? -You bet. 317 00:16:39,607 --> 00:16:41,609 -[TRUCK ENGINE STARTING] -Good. 318 00:16:41,696 --> 00:16:43,306 -'Cause Dave's stealing your truck. -[TIRES SCREECHING] 319 00:16:45,047 --> 00:16:47,049 -Cody! Get him! -[PANICKING] Dude... 320 00:16:51,445 --> 00:16:53,838 -[CHILDREN YELLING] -AL: Get out, you brat! 321 00:16:57,233 --> 00:16:59,931 Get out of the fireplace, you little creep. 322 00:17:01,281 --> 00:17:04,806 BRENDAN: Help me! Help me! 323 00:17:06,547 --> 00:17:09,419 -[CHILD SCREAMING] -Ow! 324 00:17:09,506 --> 00:17:12,422 You're bigger than them. How did this happen? 325 00:17:12,509 --> 00:17:15,730 They ganged up on me. There were hundreds of them. 326 00:17:16,513 --> 00:17:17,862 [CHILD YELLS] 327 00:17:22,650 --> 00:17:24,695 Oh, my God. 328 00:17:24,782 --> 00:17:27,568 [CHILDREN SCREAMING] 329 00:17:27,655 --> 00:17:29,613 Man, am I glad to see you guys. 330 00:17:29,700 --> 00:17:31,572 What is all this? 331 00:17:31,659 --> 00:17:34,966 JT and I are trying to babysit for 30 kids 332 00:17:35,054 --> 00:17:38,057 and things got a little out of hand. 333 00:17:38,144 --> 00:17:40,711 Look. All right, guys, you've got to help us. 334 00:17:42,974 --> 00:17:45,586 What do you think, Mark? Should we help them? 335 00:17:45,673 --> 00:17:48,067 Well, it would be the noble thing to do. 336 00:17:49,894 --> 00:17:53,072 -[BOTH LAUGHING] -TOGETHER: Nah! 337 00:17:53,159 --> 00:17:56,075 Frank, your genius children have done it again. 338 00:17:57,902 --> 00:18:00,122 [CHILDREN SCREAMING] 339 00:18:02,733 --> 00:18:04,387 [WHISTLES LOUDLY] Freeze! 340 00:18:06,520 --> 00:18:07,651 [JT GASPS] 341 00:18:09,218 --> 00:18:10,959 You... 342 00:18:11,046 --> 00:18:14,745 and you, in the kitchen, now. 343 00:18:14,832 --> 00:18:16,791 Give me that. 344 00:18:16,878 --> 00:18:18,575 [FRANK GRUMBLES] 345 00:18:26,757 --> 00:18:27,758 All right... 346 00:18:37,768 --> 00:18:39,248 [GIGGLING] 347 00:18:39,335 --> 00:18:41,250 Just let me help you here. Okay. 348 00:18:41,337 --> 00:18:43,861 You just go in there with the rest of them, all right. 349 00:18:47,517 --> 00:18:48,562 Okay... 350 00:18:49,650 --> 00:18:52,261 Start talking. 351 00:18:52,348 --> 00:18:56,135 Well, I knew how much Al wanted to go to Disneyland 352 00:18:56,222 --> 00:19:00,269 so, uh, being the loving brother that I am, 353 00:19:00,356 --> 00:19:04,447 I suggested we start a babysitting service. 354 00:19:04,534 --> 00:19:06,841 Well, what ever gave you the idea that 355 00:19:06,928 --> 00:19:10,671 you could use my house as a day care center? 356 00:19:10,758 --> 00:19:12,455 We didn't think you'd find out. 357 00:19:12,542 --> 00:19:14,370 You said you weren't gonna be home until midnight. 358 00:19:16,590 --> 00:19:20,376 Which brings up a very interesting point. 359 00:19:22,509 --> 00:19:23,858 You lied to us. 360 00:19:30,038 --> 00:19:31,866 Is that the kind of father you want to be? 361 00:19:33,346 --> 00:19:34,477 A liar? 362 00:19:36,349 --> 00:19:37,872 Be a good time for me to shut up? 363 00:19:39,090 --> 00:19:41,005 -Oh, yeah. -All right. 364 00:19:45,880 --> 00:19:47,360 Look, Dad, um... 365 00:19:48,839 --> 00:19:50,667 I'm real sorry about all this. 366 00:19:52,016 --> 00:19:54,018 I guess... 367 00:19:54,105 --> 00:19:56,673 I just really wanted to go on that vacation with my friend, 368 00:19:56,760 --> 00:19:59,763 and... I got desperate. 369 00:19:59,850 --> 00:20:04,768 Look, Al, I know you were in a big hurry to buy that airplane ticket, 370 00:20:04,855 --> 00:20:10,557 but I told you, there is no such thing as easy money. 371 00:20:10,644 --> 00:20:14,387 Yeah, I guess all the money we made tonight is gonna go towards the damages, huh? 372 00:20:15,257 --> 00:20:16,998 Yeah, I'd say so. 373 00:20:17,085 --> 00:20:20,219 Now, I want you two to clean this kitchen, now. 374 00:20:20,306 --> 00:20:22,351 I'm gonna go phone the parents of those kids. 375 00:20:23,570 --> 00:20:26,225 [AL SIGHS] 376 00:20:26,312 --> 00:20:29,228 Man, now I'm never gonna get to go to California with my friend. 377 00:20:34,798 --> 00:20:36,060 Not necessarily. 378 00:20:39,063 --> 00:20:41,501 Al, I have got an idea 379 00:20:41,588 --> 00:20:44,547 that is gonna make us a ton of money. 380 00:20:46,419 --> 00:20:47,637 Check it out. 381 00:20:47,724 --> 00:20:51,293 We import and distribute exotic reptiles. 382 00:20:52,903 --> 00:20:55,036 You're an idiot. 383 00:20:55,123 --> 00:20:57,734 No, no, no. It's gonna work. Check this out. 384 00:20:57,821 --> 00:21:00,911 We'll hitchhike to Mexico, wear really baggy pants, 385 00:21:00,998 --> 00:21:03,044 and we'll stuff like snakes and lizards down our pants. 386 00:21:03,131 --> 00:21:04,567 What could go wrong with that? 387 00:21:10,051 --> 00:21:11,922 TV REPORTER: That's it for the eleven o'clock news. 388 00:21:12,009 --> 00:21:14,708 We'll be off the air until six a.m. Good night. 389 00:21:18,146 --> 00:21:19,843 [AMERICA THE BEAUTIFUL PLAYING] 390 00:21:25,675 --> 00:21:27,242 Herbie, what do you think? 391 00:21:33,161 --> 00:21:35,163 -Mom, Ethel, wake up. -[BOTH YAWNING] 392 00:21:35,250 --> 00:21:37,252 -What? -[KAREN SIGHS] 393 00:21:37,339 --> 00:21:40,299 I found it. The perfect prom dress. 394 00:21:40,386 --> 00:21:42,301 -Oh... -What do you think? 395 00:21:42,388 --> 00:21:43,780 Wow. 396 00:21:43,867 --> 00:21:47,610 Oh, you look beautiful. 397 00:21:47,697 --> 00:21:49,743 -[CAROL GASPS] -I'll take it. 398 00:21:49,830 --> 00:21:52,093 -[BOTH SIGH] -Oh, hallelujah! 399 00:21:53,486 --> 00:21:56,315 [EXCLAIMS] Now, what about shoes? 30661

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