Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,870 --> 00:00:02,872
[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]
2
00:00:07,311 --> 00:00:10,010
I can't bear the thought
of being away from you
for Christmas.
3
00:00:10,097 --> 00:00:13,709
Me, neither.
Promise you'll fax me
every day?
4
00:00:14,884 --> 00:00:16,755
I will, I will.
5
00:00:16,842 --> 00:00:18,496
That way, even though
we're hundreds
of miles apart,
6
00:00:18,583 --> 00:00:20,411
our souls will be
electronically linked.
7
00:00:20,498 --> 00:00:22,500
[CODY LAUGHS]
8
00:00:22,587 --> 00:00:26,330
Talk about romance
in the twenty-first century,
huh? [LAUGHS]
9
00:00:26,417 --> 00:00:28,593
Goodbye, my sweet.
10
00:00:28,680 --> 00:00:30,204
Farewell, my lovely.
11
00:00:35,296 --> 00:00:38,603
Is it me, or is she just
one smokin' mama?
12
00:00:38,690 --> 00:00:40,649
[LAUGHS] Gotta love that.
13
00:00:43,260 --> 00:00:45,175
[THEME SONG PLAYING]
14
00:00:49,527 --> 00:00:51,399
MAN:
♪ The dream got broken
15
00:00:51,486 --> 00:00:53,270
♪ Seemed like all was lost
16
00:00:53,357 --> 00:00:55,359
♪ What would be the future?
17
00:00:55,446 --> 00:00:56,839
♪ Could you pay the cost?
18
00:00:56,926 --> 00:00:57,927
♪ You wonder
19
00:00:58,014 --> 00:00:59,711
♪ Will there ever be
20
00:00:59,798 --> 00:01:01,757
♪ A second time around?
21
00:01:03,628 --> 00:01:04,977
WOMAN:
♪ Woah-a, woah-a
22
00:01:05,065 --> 00:01:06,501
♪ When the tears are over
23
00:01:06,588 --> 00:01:08,894
♪ And the moment has come
24
00:01:08,981 --> 00:01:12,507
♪ Say, "My Lord
I think I found someone"
25
00:01:12,594 --> 00:01:14,683
♪ You know it will be better
26
00:01:14,770 --> 00:01:16,598
♪ 'Cause you're putting
it together
27
00:01:16,685 --> 00:01:19,079
♪ For the second time around
28
00:01:24,649 --> 00:01:27,957
ALL:
♪ Step by step, day by day
29
00:01:28,044 --> 00:01:29,393
WOMAN:
♪ Day by day
30
00:01:29,480 --> 00:01:30,829
ALL:
♪ A fresh start over
31
00:01:30,916 --> 00:01:32,527
♪ A different hand to play
32
00:01:32,614 --> 00:01:34,442
♪ The deeper we fall
33
00:01:34,529 --> 00:01:36,835
♪ The stronger we stay
34
00:01:36,922 --> 00:01:38,924
WOMAN:
♪ We'll make it better
35
00:01:39,011 --> 00:01:41,013
MAN:
♪ Second time around ♪
36
00:01:54,940 --> 00:01:56,290
[STAPLING]
37
00:02:04,646 --> 00:02:08,476
It's ski time.
This is gonna be the
greatest Christmas ever.
38
00:02:09,477 --> 00:02:10,652
I don't know, JT.
39
00:02:10,739 --> 00:02:12,175
Don't you think
it's kind of lame
40
00:02:12,262 --> 00:02:13,655
to be away from your family
at Christmas?
41
00:02:14,482 --> 00:02:16,658
Cody, I'm 18.
42
00:02:16,745 --> 00:02:18,877
I'm a little too old
to be sitting around the tree,
43
00:02:18,964 --> 00:02:21,315
singing The Twelve Days Of Christmaswith the kiddies.
44
00:02:21,402 --> 00:02:23,317
Yeah. Well, what do you think,
Uncle Frank?
45
00:02:23,404 --> 00:02:24,970
Don't you think
it's kind of lame
46
00:02:25,057 --> 00:02:27,016
to be away from your family
at Christmas?
47
00:02:27,103 --> 00:02:28,931
Well, like he said, he's 18.
48
00:02:29,018 --> 00:02:31,542
If that's what he wants to do
for the holidays, that's fine.
49
00:02:31,629 --> 00:02:33,936
Thanks, Dad. Gotta go.
See ya later, Code.
50
00:02:34,023 --> 00:02:35,764
-Sure.
-See ya, son.
51
00:02:35,851 --> 00:02:38,158
-Have fun skiing. Bye.
-[DOOR CLOSES]
52
00:02:38,245 --> 00:02:39,985
That ungrateful little brat.
53
00:02:43,119 --> 00:02:45,730
I spend 18 years raising him
and he leaves me at Christmas.
54
00:02:46,688 --> 00:02:48,168
Whoa, Uncle Frank, man...
55
00:02:51,171 --> 00:02:53,521
Major 'tude swing,
dude. [LAUGHS]
56
00:02:53,608 --> 00:02:56,306
I mean, hey, if you didn't
want him to go,
why didn't you just say so?
57
00:02:56,393 --> 00:02:58,656
Cody, that's not my style.
58
00:02:58,743 --> 00:03:00,702
Sure, I'm gonna miss him,
59
00:03:00,789 --> 00:03:02,704
but I'll just have to try
not to think about him.
60
00:03:02,791 --> 00:03:05,402
[SCOFFS] Yeah. Well,
good luck. [CHUCKLES]
61
00:03:05,489 --> 00:03:07,883
Hey, man, if I was you,
that's all I'd be
thinking about. [LAUGHS]
62
00:03:07,970 --> 00:03:11,582
Sure, my first born son
won't be with me at Christmas.
63
00:03:11,669 --> 00:03:13,454
Oh, yeah,
there's plenty of turkey,
64
00:03:13,541 --> 00:03:15,456
but JT won't be here
to eat it.
65
00:03:15,543 --> 00:03:18,502
Yeah, oh, all kinds of eggnog,
66
00:03:18,589 --> 00:03:20,765
but JT won't be here
to drink it. Nope.
67
00:03:20,852 --> 00:03:23,115
Of course, there'll be
plenty of presents,
68
00:03:23,203 --> 00:03:26,031
but JT won't be here
to open them up and say,
69
00:03:26,118 --> 00:03:30,471
"Gee, thanks, Dad,
you're the greatest guy
in the world."
70
00:03:30,558 --> 00:03:33,778
God, God, this is sadder than
when they shot Old Yeller.
71
00:03:33,865 --> 00:03:36,259
All right, all right,
I get your point.
72
00:03:36,346 --> 00:03:39,088
Just stop talking
about how much
I'm going to miss JT.
73
00:03:39,175 --> 00:03:41,656
Yeah, right, dude.
You're the one who keeps
bringing it up.
74
00:03:41,743 --> 00:03:43,484
[SCOFFS]
75
00:03:43,571 --> 00:03:46,574
[DOOR OPENS, CLOSES]
76
00:03:46,661 --> 00:03:48,010
-[STAPLES]
-[GLASS SHATTERS]
77
00:03:54,364 --> 00:03:55,800
[GLASS PIECES CLINKING]
78
00:03:57,715 --> 00:04:00,240
♪ Deck the halls
with boughs of holly
79
00:04:00,327 --> 00:04:02,154
♪ Fa la la la la la la la la ♪
80
00:04:02,242 --> 00:04:04,505
Honey, honey, I'm afraid
I have some bad news.
81
00:04:04,592 --> 00:04:06,898
You know that vase
you ordered by mail?
82
00:04:06,985 --> 00:04:09,510
I think some bonehead
down at the post office
broke it.
83
00:04:09,597 --> 00:04:10,815
[GLASS PIECES CLINKING]
84
00:04:12,687 --> 00:04:14,602
Wrapping with the staple gun
again, Frank?
85
00:04:18,083 --> 00:04:21,391
-[PHONE RINGING]
-I'll get it!
86
00:04:21,478 --> 00:04:23,088
It's probably my little
love muffin.
87
00:04:25,221 --> 00:04:27,223
Hello, baby.
88
00:04:27,310 --> 00:04:29,747
Ah! It's Aunt Edna.
89
00:04:29,834 --> 00:04:32,663
Shh! Shh! Okay, everybody
pretend we're not home.
Just be quiet.
90
00:04:32,750 --> 00:04:34,622
Come on, guys.
91
00:04:36,406 --> 00:04:40,628
Hello. Oh, hi, Aunt Edna,
what a nice surprise.
92
00:04:42,412 --> 00:04:46,677
Yes, uh, yes, we're going
to be home for Christmas.
93
00:04:46,764 --> 00:04:48,766
No, no, no,
don't tell her we're going
to be home for Christmas.
94
00:04:48,853 --> 00:04:50,942
Tell her... Tell her, uh,
tell her we don't
celebrate Christmas.
95
00:04:51,029 --> 00:04:52,944
Tell her we're Jewish.
Tell her we're Jewish!
96
00:04:53,031 --> 00:04:55,556
[SINGING "HAVA NAGELA"]
97
00:04:57,340 --> 00:05:00,038
Shh! Shh!
98
00:05:00,125 --> 00:05:01,736
Would you be quiet.
99
00:05:04,869 --> 00:05:07,394
Excuse us. We're just playing
our Hanukkah records.
100
00:05:09,961 --> 00:05:13,617
Well, of course we'd love
to have you join us
for Christmas.
101
00:05:13,704 --> 00:05:16,533
Okay. See you soon.
102
00:05:16,620 --> 00:05:20,276
Oh, honey, how could you
invite that old bat over here
for Christmas?
103
00:05:21,451 --> 00:05:23,845
Well, Frank, she's family.
104
00:05:23,932 --> 00:05:25,368
She's a witch!
105
00:05:25,455 --> 00:05:27,022
You know, the last time
she was here,
106
00:05:27,109 --> 00:05:30,852
she pinched my cheeks so hard,
I wet my pants.
107
00:05:33,071 --> 00:05:34,595
Yeah, and she never
gets my name right.
108
00:05:34,682 --> 00:05:38,860
She's always calling me
Mike or Moe or Melvin.
109
00:05:38,947 --> 00:05:40,252
At least she gets
close to your name.
110
00:05:40,340 --> 00:05:43,212
All she ever calls me
is Lazy Boy.
111
00:05:43,299 --> 00:05:45,954
I thought your cousin Ernie
had to take her this year.
112
00:05:46,041 --> 00:05:50,611
Well, apparently,
Ernie had to have
an emergency heart bypass.
113
00:05:50,698 --> 00:05:52,134
[SCOFFS] Oh, right.
114
00:05:54,876 --> 00:05:57,139
Like that couldn't wait
until after the holidays.
115
00:05:58,706 --> 00:06:01,056
-[DOORBELL RINGS]
-Well, that must be her.
116
00:06:01,143 --> 00:06:03,232
Run for your lives!
117
00:06:03,319 --> 00:06:05,930
Wait a minute, must be her?
Honey, how'd she
get here so fast?
118
00:06:06,017 --> 00:06:09,194
Well, she was calling
from the corner.
119
00:06:09,281 --> 00:06:11,022
You know, you should've
let us kept singing.
120
00:06:11,109 --> 00:06:12,459
I think that Jewish thing
would have worked.
121
00:06:12,546 --> 00:06:14,504
Just stop it. Shh.
122
00:06:19,074 --> 00:06:22,425
Well, hi, Aunt Edna.
How nice to see you.
123
00:06:22,512 --> 00:06:24,775
Oh, yeah?
124
00:06:24,862 --> 00:06:27,430
Then how come every Christmas
I get passed around
like a bad fruitcake?
125
00:06:28,997 --> 00:06:31,303
Well, we like fruitcake.
[CHUCKLES]
126
00:06:31,391 --> 00:06:32,696
Where are your bags?
127
00:06:32,783 --> 00:06:34,176
In the car.
128
00:06:34,263 --> 00:06:36,134
Hey, Lazy Boy, go get my bags.
129
00:06:42,314 --> 00:06:43,533
Nice to see you, too,
Aunt Edna.
130
00:06:48,973 --> 00:06:50,671
Aunt Edna,
you remember the kids?
131
00:06:50,758 --> 00:06:53,413
Well, of course
I remember them. [CHUCKLES]
132
00:06:53,500 --> 00:06:55,415
Hey, Whitey,
what's your name again?
133
00:06:57,547 --> 00:06:58,722
Mark.
134
00:07:00,463 --> 00:07:02,030
Mark, right.
135
00:07:02,117 --> 00:07:03,727
I never did like that name.
136
00:07:03,814 --> 00:07:05,686
From now on,
your name is Maurice.
137
00:07:08,515 --> 00:07:10,081
You can't do that.
138
00:07:10,168 --> 00:07:12,736
I'm older than dirt.
I can do anything I want.
139
00:07:12,823 --> 00:07:15,435
Now shut up and go help
Lazy Boy with my bags.
140
00:07:19,221 --> 00:07:21,005
Aunt Edna, you seem
kind of tense.
141
00:07:21,092 --> 00:07:23,181
Would you like to
lie down for a while?
142
00:07:23,268 --> 00:07:25,401
No, not until I check out
Smiley here.
143
00:07:31,189 --> 00:07:34,715
Look, we went through this
the last time you were here.
144
00:07:34,802 --> 00:07:39,023
All right, the name
is not Smiley. It's Al.
145
00:07:39,110 --> 00:07:40,460
You know, I don't care
how old you are,
146
00:07:40,547 --> 00:07:42,113
I'm not taking
any lip from you.
147
00:07:42,200 --> 00:07:44,768
-Al!
-Oh, no, no, no,
that's okay. [LAUGHS]
148
00:07:44,855 --> 00:07:47,902
I like this one.
She's got spunk. [CHUCKLES]
149
00:07:50,295 --> 00:07:53,168
You get in my face again
and I'll be on you
like a bad rash.
150
00:08:12,143 --> 00:08:14,494
[ALL CHEERING]
151
00:08:19,760 --> 00:08:23,198
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,
152
00:08:23,285 --> 00:08:25,983
you said we were staying
in an Alpine chalet.
153
00:08:26,070 --> 00:08:28,595
This place looks more like
the entrance to a mine shaft.
154
00:08:28,682 --> 00:08:31,075
Well, it's supposed
to be rustic.
155
00:08:31,162 --> 00:08:32,686
It's all part of that
wilderness experience.
156
00:08:35,253 --> 00:08:38,082
What's that shack
with the steam
coming out of it?
157
00:08:38,169 --> 00:08:41,303
That's another part
of the wilderness experience.
It's the outhouse.
158
00:08:43,871 --> 00:08:46,351
Oh, man. I hope
I can hold it 'til Monday.
159
00:08:48,832 --> 00:08:52,053
Well, here it is, our little
mountain bachelor pad.
160
00:08:52,140 --> 00:08:55,752
Man, this place is a dump.
There's like 10 guys,
and we only got four cots.
161
00:08:55,839 --> 00:08:57,711
Who cares about the cabin?
162
00:08:57,798 --> 00:08:59,669
I mean, we're going to be
spending all our time
on the ski slopes.
163
00:08:59,756 --> 00:09:02,542
Huh, think again. An avalanche
took out the ski lifts.
164
00:09:03,978 --> 00:09:05,632
Oh, man, this is so lame.
165
00:09:05,719 --> 00:09:08,504
I'm stuck in this rat hole
and I can't even ski.
166
00:09:08,591 --> 00:09:10,462
Man, it doesn't get
any worse than this.
167
00:09:10,550 --> 00:09:13,161
Oh, yeah it does.
The outhouse has a metal seat.
168
00:09:29,351 --> 00:09:32,310
I can't believe Mom stuck us
with cooking the turkey.
169
00:09:32,397 --> 00:09:34,356
Well, she couldn't help it.
170
00:09:34,443 --> 00:09:36,880
It's Christmas Eve
and she's backed up
in the beauty shop.
171
00:09:36,967 --> 00:09:39,883
Come on, I mean,
how hard can it be?
172
00:09:39,970 --> 00:09:41,711
It came with directions.
173
00:09:41,798 --> 00:09:43,147
All right.
174
00:09:43,234 --> 00:09:45,715
"Step number one,
175
00:09:45,802 --> 00:09:49,284
"Reach inside the body cavity
and remove the heart,
gizzard and other innards."
176
00:09:53,244 --> 00:09:54,550
Go ahead, Karen.
177
00:09:56,204 --> 00:09:58,946
No way. I don't do innards.
178
00:10:01,035 --> 00:10:03,124
You are such a wimp.
179
00:10:03,211 --> 00:10:05,996
Yeah, well, I don't see you
fishing around inside
Mister Turkey.
180
00:10:07,868 --> 00:10:09,173
Fine, I'll do it.
181
00:10:16,050 --> 00:10:17,312
Oh, it's wet in there.
182
00:10:18,792 --> 00:10:21,446
And there's a loose flap
of skin hanging down.
183
00:10:23,710 --> 00:10:25,755
What are you princesses
doing in the kitchen?
184
00:10:25,842 --> 00:10:27,148
You get lost?
185
00:10:30,107 --> 00:10:33,807
No, Carol put us in charge
of cooking the turkey,
186
00:10:33,894 --> 00:10:37,332
but we kind of don't want
to clean it out.
187
00:10:37,419 --> 00:10:39,290
What's your problem?
188
00:10:39,377 --> 00:10:41,684
Just stick your hand
up his butt
and you go to work.
189
00:10:46,646 --> 00:10:49,257
What are you waiting for,
candlelight and soft music?
190
00:10:58,919 --> 00:11:01,965
Oh, this is disgusting.
191
00:11:02,052 --> 00:11:04,315
Yeah, well, it's no picnic
for the bird, either.
192
00:11:08,232 --> 00:11:10,191
Grab his guts and rip 'em out.
193
00:11:13,455 --> 00:11:14,935
Oh, God.
194
00:11:16,197 --> 00:11:18,416
-Come on.
-[GROANING]
195
00:11:23,117 --> 00:11:24,466
You left some.
196
00:11:38,262 --> 00:11:41,439
Okay, who's the genius
who decided to bring
frozen dinners up here?
197
00:11:43,615 --> 00:11:46,140
I'm sucking on frozen gravy.
198
00:11:48,142 --> 00:11:50,100
This is the lowest moment
of my life.
199
00:11:51,449 --> 00:11:52,712
[KNOCK AT DOOR]
200
00:11:55,715 --> 00:11:58,500
Hi, guys, it's party time.
[LAUGHS]
201
00:11:58,587 --> 00:12:00,502
The entertainment committee
is here.
202
00:12:04,071 --> 00:12:05,725
Hey, JT, check it out.
203
00:12:05,812 --> 00:12:07,596
Your friends are here.
Beavis and Butt-head.
204
00:12:07,683 --> 00:12:09,206
[LAUGHS]
205
00:12:09,293 --> 00:12:11,861
There's no bottom
to this nightmare.
206
00:12:11,948 --> 00:12:15,473
I have to take
the up escalator
just to get to Hell.
207
00:12:15,560 --> 00:12:19,260
We brought
a really great video.
Naughty Ski Babes.[LAUGHS]
208
00:12:23,612 --> 00:12:27,834
Yeah. We like, taped it off
the Smut Channel. Huh huh.
209
00:12:27,921 --> 00:12:31,098
A porno movie
on Christmas Eve.
You guys are sick!
210
00:12:31,185 --> 00:12:32,752
[VIEO PLAYING INDISTINCTLY]
211
00:12:32,839 --> 00:12:34,884
What are all
the squiggly lines for?
212
00:12:34,971 --> 00:12:38,366
LARRY: Uh, it's scrambled.
213
00:12:38,453 --> 00:12:42,065
But if you like look
really close,
there's butts and stuff.
214
00:12:42,152 --> 00:12:44,285
Yep. Butts.
215
00:12:44,372 --> 00:12:46,853
You guys are perverts, man.
I gotta get some air.
216
00:12:46,940 --> 00:12:48,332
You're gonna
miss the best part.
217
00:12:48,419 --> 00:12:49,638
Whoa! There goes a boob.
218
00:12:49,725 --> 00:12:51,422
Yeah, man, yeah.
219
00:12:51,509 --> 00:12:53,729
That's not a boob.
It's a bald guy.
220
00:13:06,394 --> 00:13:08,918
-[MUSIC PLAYING]
-[INDISTINCT CHATTERING]
221
00:13:09,005 --> 00:13:10,398
[PHONE RINGING]
222
00:13:10,485 --> 00:13:12,922
Oh, I'll get it.
223
00:13:13,009 --> 00:13:15,098
Merry Christmas.
Cody Lambert speaking.
224
00:13:15,185 --> 00:13:17,622
Hey, Cody, it's JT.
Man, how's it going?
225
00:13:17,709 --> 00:13:19,842
Oh, totally awesome, bro.
[CHUCKLES]
226
00:13:19,929 --> 00:13:21,713
Your dad built
this big old raging fire,
227
00:13:21,801 --> 00:13:23,367
we got a monster turkey
in the oven,
228
00:13:23,454 --> 00:13:25,674
mashed potatoes
up the wazoo. [LAUGHS]
229
00:13:25,761 --> 00:13:29,634
Hey, for later, Carol made
three kinds of pies.
230
00:13:29,721 --> 00:13:31,941
Hey, did you guys sing
Christmas carols yet?
231
00:13:32,028 --> 00:13:34,465
Oh, no, we're saving that
for later on,
232
00:13:34,552 --> 00:13:36,163
probably around midnight,
233
00:13:36,250 --> 00:13:38,513
you know, when we're all
feeling nice
and warm and cozy,
234
00:13:38,600 --> 00:13:41,081
and there's a lot of love
in the room. [LAUGHS]
235
00:13:41,168 --> 00:13:42,299
How's it going for you?
236
00:13:43,997 --> 00:13:46,608
Oh, just great.
237
00:13:46,695 --> 00:13:48,175
Great.
238
00:13:48,262 --> 00:13:49,829
The food's great.
239
00:13:49,916 --> 00:13:53,397
The cabin's great.
Everything's just great, Code.
240
00:13:53,484 --> 00:13:56,096
Dude, you just said great
five times in a row.
241
00:13:56,183 --> 00:13:59,490
You ain't gotta be a gardener
to figure out who's spreading
around the manure, you know
242
00:14:02,406 --> 00:14:04,278
All right, Cody, man,
the whole thing's a bust.
243
00:14:04,365 --> 00:14:07,063
I'm with a bunch of guys
and we're sucking down
frozen dinners
244
00:14:07,150 --> 00:14:10,632
and watching scrambled
porno movies. I'm miserable.
245
00:14:10,719 --> 00:14:13,591
Well, dude, why don't you
just bag that bummer
and come on home?
246
00:14:13,678 --> 00:14:15,376
I can't do that.
247
00:14:15,463 --> 00:14:17,987
I made a big deal about
being too old for Christmas.
248
00:14:18,074 --> 00:14:21,164
If I come home now,
it'll be like telling my dad
I'm still a little kid.
249
00:14:21,251 --> 00:14:24,124
Oh, man, he won't think that.
He'd love to see you here.
250
00:14:24,211 --> 00:14:26,213
Why don't you hold on,
I'll go get him.
251
00:14:26,300 --> 00:14:28,432
No, no, Cody,
I can't talk to him, man.
252
00:14:28,519 --> 00:14:31,696
Just... Just tell everybody
I said, "Merry Christmas."
Okay, Cody?
253
00:14:31,783 --> 00:14:33,437
I gotta go. Bye.
254
00:14:49,801 --> 00:14:53,631
Hey, Uncle Frank,
I think we've got
kind of a problem.
255
00:14:53,718 --> 00:14:55,285
Uh, look, JT just called
and he said he's having
256
00:14:55,372 --> 00:14:57,548
a miserable time
up at that ski lodge.
257
00:14:57,635 --> 00:14:59,855
Well, why doesn't he
just come home?
258
00:14:59,942 --> 00:15:02,945
Well, because he made such
a big deal about being
too old for Christmas.
259
00:15:03,032 --> 00:15:06,209
Well, now he's embarrassed
and doesn't want to admit
he was wrong.
260
00:15:06,296 --> 00:15:08,385
I think you should go
up there and get him.
261
00:15:08,472 --> 00:15:11,823
Oh, no. No, I'm not driving
two hours to pick him up.
262
00:15:11,911 --> 00:15:14,914
If he's such a big boy,
he can come home himself.
263
00:15:15,001 --> 00:15:20,920
You know, this passive
aggressive jive is really
starting to cheese me off.
264
00:15:21,007 --> 00:15:23,748
I mean, look, you didn't
want him going up there
in the first place,
265
00:15:23,835 --> 00:15:25,707
but you wouldn't say anything.
266
00:15:25,794 --> 00:15:27,665
Well, now he wants
to come home,
but he won't tell you.
267
00:15:27,752 --> 00:15:30,190
Well, of course he won't
tell me. And you know
why he won't tell me?
268
00:15:30,277 --> 00:15:32,235
Because he's stubborn
and pig headed.
269
00:15:32,322 --> 00:15:34,803
[SCOFFS] Stubborn
and pig headed, huh,
Uncle Frank?
270
00:15:34,890 --> 00:15:37,675
I wonder where he gets
that from? Oink, oink.
271
00:15:48,469 --> 00:15:50,993
-Whoa, that was cool.
-Yeah, yeah.
272
00:15:51,080 --> 00:15:53,126
[KNOCK AT DOOR]
273
00:15:53,213 --> 00:15:55,432
I'll get it. Maybe it's
a serial killer and he'll
put me out of my misery.
274
00:15:59,654 --> 00:16:02,135
Dad, what are you doing here?
275
00:16:02,222 --> 00:16:07,575
Well, it was a nice night,
so I thought I'd take
a little two hour drive.
276
00:16:07,662 --> 00:16:10,708
Son, is there some place
we can talk alone?
277
00:16:10,795 --> 00:16:13,189
Sure. Either here on the porch
or over there on the outhouse.
278
00:16:15,322 --> 00:16:17,193
Uh, let's try the porch, okay?
279
00:16:25,506 --> 00:16:26,986
So...
280
00:16:28,422 --> 00:16:29,771
What did you
want to talk about?
281
00:16:31,555 --> 00:16:34,906
Oh. You know.
282
00:16:34,994 --> 00:16:37,605
Just wondering how things
were going up here. [CHUCKLES]
283
00:16:39,476 --> 00:16:41,174
They're going...
284
00:16:41,261 --> 00:16:44,090
You know. Going.
285
00:16:44,177 --> 00:16:46,179
How are, uh,
things going at home?
286
00:16:47,876 --> 00:16:49,747
Oh... You know.
287
00:16:51,836 --> 00:16:54,578
Boy, we're not very good
at telling each other
how we feel, are we?
288
00:16:54,665 --> 00:16:57,190
-We stink, Dad.
-Yeah.
289
00:16:57,277 --> 00:17:00,019
Wll, you probably get that
from me. So, I'll go first.
290
00:17:02,195 --> 00:17:04,023
Son, it's Christmas.
291
00:17:04,762 --> 00:17:06,677
I want you home.
292
00:17:06,764 --> 00:17:10,072
I didn't want you
to come up here
in the first place.
293
00:17:10,159 --> 00:17:12,335
So, why didn't you
say something
before I left?
294
00:17:14,772 --> 00:17:19,429
Well, when you told me
you didn't want to be
around for Christmas,
295
00:17:20,735 --> 00:17:22,998
it kind of hurt.
296
00:17:23,085 --> 00:17:24,434
But I didn't know
how to say that,
297
00:17:24,521 --> 00:17:27,785
so I just pretended
it didn't bother me.
298
00:17:30,223 --> 00:17:31,920
That's pretty stupid,
isn't it?
299
00:17:32,877 --> 00:17:34,140
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
300
00:17:34,227 --> 00:17:35,967
Not as stupid
as me staying here
301
00:17:36,055 --> 00:17:39,188
even though I was having
a lousy time.
302
00:17:39,275 --> 00:17:43,627
Well, why didn't you just
tell me when you called?
I would have picked you up.
303
00:17:43,714 --> 00:17:46,108
Like it would have been
real manly of me
to call up and say,
304
00:17:46,195 --> 00:17:49,068
"Daddy, I miss you,
can I please come home?"
305
00:17:50,765 --> 00:17:52,854
[SIGHS]
306
00:17:52,941 --> 00:17:57,859
You know, JT,
we could probably save
ourselves a lot of trouble
307
00:17:57,946 --> 00:18:00,731
if we just stop trying to act
so tough all the time
308
00:18:00,818 --> 00:18:04,387
and told each other
what we were really thinking.
309
00:18:09,131 --> 00:18:10,741
You know
what I'm thinking, Dad?
310
00:18:10,828 --> 00:18:12,091
What?
311
00:18:13,527 --> 00:18:14,876
I want to come home
for Christmas.
312
00:18:17,487 --> 00:18:18,967
You know what I'm thinking?
313
00:18:20,403 --> 00:18:22,057
I'd love to have you home.
314
00:18:32,937 --> 00:18:36,767
Oh, what did those girls
put on that turkey?
315
00:18:36,854 --> 00:18:38,987
I have more gas
than a Texaco station.
316
00:18:42,164 --> 00:18:43,905
[WATER RUNNING]
317
00:18:43,992 --> 00:18:46,037
I thought you were trying
to sleep, Aunt Edna.
318
00:18:46,125 --> 00:18:47,648
How am I supposed to sleep
319
00:18:47,735 --> 00:18:49,911
if I feel like I'm digesting
a bowling ball?
320
00:18:52,435 --> 00:18:54,829
You never should have
let those girls
cook that meal.
321
00:18:54,916 --> 00:18:58,311
I think they tried
to poison me.
322
00:18:58,398 --> 00:19:00,835
You know, Aunt Edna,
you have been here
an entire day
323
00:19:00,922 --> 00:19:03,881
and you have not said
one nice thing to anybody.
324
00:19:03,968 --> 00:19:06,275
When I think of something nice
to say, I'll mention it.
325
00:19:07,972 --> 00:19:10,366
What is your problem?
326
00:19:10,453 --> 00:19:13,152
You know, we have gone
out of our way to welcome you
327
00:19:13,239 --> 00:19:15,458
and you do nothing
but crab at us.
328
00:19:15,545 --> 00:19:18,418
We opened our home to you,
we cooked dinner for you,
329
00:19:18,505 --> 00:19:20,550
we even gave you our bedroom.
330
00:19:20,637 --> 00:19:23,597
Obviously, nothing we can do
will make you happy.
331
00:19:23,684 --> 00:19:25,990
So why don't you just
go ahead and be a pill.
332
00:19:26,077 --> 00:19:29,907
But I will not let it ruin
my Christmas, or my family's.
333
00:19:36,784 --> 00:19:38,089
I'm sorry.
334
00:19:39,439 --> 00:19:41,223
I know I'm a pain in the butt.
335
00:19:41,310 --> 00:19:43,617
I try not to be,
but it just comes out.
336
00:19:47,186 --> 00:19:49,536
Why? What are you
so angry about?
337
00:19:52,016 --> 00:19:53,540
I'm not angry,
338
00:19:54,802 --> 00:19:56,760
I'm lonely.
339
00:19:56,847 --> 00:19:59,198
I know everybody's nice
to me at Christmas,
340
00:19:59,285 --> 00:20:01,635
but for the rest of the year,
I just sit home alone
341
00:20:01,722 --> 00:20:04,333
watching People's Court
and talking to my cat.
342
00:20:06,640 --> 00:20:09,730
I would like to have
a good time at Christmas,
343
00:20:09,817 --> 00:20:14,778
but the nicer you are to me,
the more it reminds me
that the rest of the year...
344
00:20:14,865 --> 00:20:18,042
I don't have anybody.
345
00:20:18,129 --> 00:20:21,176
Well, gee, I never thought
about what your life
must be like.
346
00:20:23,831 --> 00:20:26,007
I hope I haven't ruined
your Christmas.
347
00:20:26,094 --> 00:20:28,227
I'd hate to do that
to my favorite niece.
348
00:20:29,402 --> 00:20:31,186
I'm your favorite niece?
349
00:20:31,273 --> 00:20:33,536
Well, sure. [CHUCKLES]
350
00:20:33,623 --> 00:20:36,496
Why do you think I made up
that story about Ernie
needing a heart bypass?
351
00:20:38,585 --> 00:20:41,283
[CHUCKLES] You mean
that wasn't true?
352
00:20:41,370 --> 00:20:45,853
[LAUGHING] No,
Ernie's as healthy as a horse.
353
00:20:45,940 --> 00:20:49,073
I just wanted to be with you
and your family.
354
00:20:51,075 --> 00:20:52,947
Maybe we should just get
together more often.
355
00:20:53,034 --> 00:20:54,905
You know,
not just at Christmas.
356
00:20:54,992 --> 00:20:57,386
Oh, that would
make me very happy.
357
00:20:57,473 --> 00:20:59,519
-Oh.
-[SOBBING]
358
00:20:59,606 --> 00:21:01,608
ALL:
♪ On the first day
of Christmas
359
00:21:01,695 --> 00:21:03,653
♪ My true love gave to me
360
00:21:03,740 --> 00:21:07,962
♪ A partridge in a pear tree
361
00:21:08,049 --> 00:21:10,138
♪ On the second day
of Christmas,
362
00:21:10,225 --> 00:21:11,879
♪ My true love gave to me
363
00:21:11,966 --> 00:21:13,968
♪ Two turtledoves
364
00:21:14,055 --> 00:21:18,494
♪ And a partridge
in a pear tree
365
00:21:18,581 --> 00:21:20,801
♪ On the third day
of Christmas
366
00:21:20,888 --> 00:21:22,933
♪ My true love gave to me
367
00:21:23,020 --> 00:21:24,544
♪ Three French hens
368
00:21:24,631 --> 00:21:26,067
♪ Two turtledoves
369
00:21:26,154 --> 00:21:30,376
♪ And a partridge
in a pear tree
370
00:21:30,463 --> 00:21:32,595
♪ On the fourth day
of Christmas
371
00:21:32,682 --> 00:21:34,597
♪ My true love gave to me
372
00:21:34,684 --> 00:21:36,164
♪ Four calling birds
373
00:21:36,251 --> 00:21:37,818
♪ Three Fench hens
374
00:21:37,905 --> 00:21:39,341
♪ Two turtledoves
375
00:21:39,428 --> 00:21:43,476
♪ And a partridge
in a pear tree
376
00:21:43,563 --> 00:21:45,739
♪ On the fifth day
of Christmas
377
00:21:45,826 --> 00:21:47,871
♪ My true love gave to me
378
00:21:47,958 --> 00:21:50,831
♪ Five golden rings
379
00:21:50,918 --> 00:21:52,180
-Dudesie.
-[ALL LAUGH]
380
00:21:52,267 --> 00:21:53,486
♪ Four calling birds
381
00:21:53,573 --> 00:21:54,748
♪ Three Fench hens
382
00:21:54,835 --> 00:21:56,358
♪ Two turtledoves
383
00:21:56,445 --> 00:21:59,187
♪ And a partridge
in a pear tree♪
384
00:22:04,888 --> 00:22:08,414
Dude, this was a totally
awesome Christmas, huh?
[CHUCKLES]
385
00:22:08,501 --> 00:22:10,241
Yeah, it was okay.
386
00:22:10,329 --> 00:22:12,722
"Okay?" What are you
talking about, little cuz?
387
00:22:12,809 --> 00:22:14,550
You got all the loot
you wanted.
388
00:22:14,637 --> 00:22:16,030
Yeah, but
what good are presents
389
00:22:16,117 --> 00:22:18,075
if you can't share them
with the woman you love?
390
00:22:19,120 --> 00:22:20,426
[DOORBELL RINGS]
391
00:22:20,513 --> 00:22:22,210
I'll get it.
392
00:22:22,297 --> 00:22:24,125
You just stay right here
and wallow in self pity.
[CHUCKLES]
393
00:22:27,868 --> 00:22:29,565
Hi, Cody.
394
00:22:29,652 --> 00:22:31,654
-Gabrielle!
-Mark!
30552
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Northern Sotho
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof