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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,857 --> 00:00:02,880 Boo! 2 00:00:02,905 --> 00:00:04,052 Sorry to startle you. 3 00:00:04,513 --> 00:00:05,552 You didn't startle us. 4 00:00:05,576 --> 00:00:07,537 Yeah, you struggled with the lock for like thirty seconds. 5 00:00:07,561 --> 00:00:08,695 I got a new job! 6 00:00:08,729 --> 00:00:10,536 - Babe, that's great. - Oh, that's awesome. 7 00:00:10,561 --> 00:00:12,195 Well, not really "new." 8 00:00:12,230 --> 00:00:14,607 I'm starting on a trial basis tomorrow. 9 00:00:14,632 --> 00:00:15,662 So where is it? 10 00:00:15,678 --> 00:00:16,945 Is it at that super crunchy school? 11 00:00:17,013 --> 00:00:19,147 It's the most progressive school in Los Angeles. 12 00:00:19,215 --> 00:00:21,850 It's basically heaven if heaven were populated 13 00:00:21,917 --> 00:00:24,152 with kids that look like tiny members of Arcade Fire. 14 00:00:24,220 --> 00:00:25,412 Sounds like your dream job. 15 00:00:25,437 --> 00:00:27,822 I'd give you a hug, but my shirt smells pretty weird today. 16 00:00:27,890 --> 00:00:29,157 Thank you. I was actually worried. 17 00:00:29,225 --> 00:00:30,325 It was getting rough out there. 18 00:00:35,731 --> 00:00:36,665 Ah... 19 00:00:36,732 --> 00:00:38,500 La-la-la-la-la-la. 20 00:00:40,088 --> 00:00:41,294 God, I miss Paris. 21 00:00:41,504 --> 00:00:42,654 Stop it! 22 00:00:43,072 --> 00:00:44,172 Wha...? I was drinking that. 23 00:00:44,240 --> 00:00:45,407 It's Jess's. 24 00:00:45,474 --> 00:00:46,849 Every time she gets a job at a new school, 25 00:00:46,874 --> 00:00:48,176 she brings back kid germs 26 00:00:48,244 --> 00:00:49,844 that infect your filthy body. 27 00:00:49,912 --> 00:00:51,012 Don't get me sick. 28 00:00:51,080 --> 00:00:52,380 Don't get me sick either, man. 29 00:00:52,448 --> 00:00:54,883 I got a date coming up, and I might get to mouth-base. 30 00:00:54,950 --> 00:00:56,217 I'm not gonna get sick. 31 00:00:56,285 --> 00:00:59,848 No germ can live in a body that is 65% beer. 32 00:00:59,873 --> 00:01:02,027 Nick, are you eating raisins from my purse? 33 00:01:02,052 --> 00:01:03,701 I confiscated those from a kid. 34 00:01:03,726 --> 00:01:05,493 That explains why they're so sticky. 35 00:01:05,756 --> 00:01:07,902 Sticky Nicky eats anything 36 00:01:07,927 --> 00:01:09,255 and I don't get sick. 37 00:01:09,662 --> 00:01:11,840 Nick, you have, like, 7,500 raisins all over your room. 38 00:01:11,865 --> 00:01:13,633 Why would you eat the...? 39 00:01:13,919 --> 00:01:15,435 I knew it. I knew it. 40 00:01:15,460 --> 00:01:16,974 That was so immediate. 41 00:01:23,678 --> 00:01:27,314 And this is our nondenominational Eden. 42 00:01:34,088 --> 00:01:35,589 - Wow. - I know. 43 00:01:35,657 --> 00:01:37,024 Did the kids build the chicken coup? 44 00:01:37,091 --> 00:01:39,359 Yep. Only hens, though, obviously. 45 00:01:39,427 --> 00:01:42,029 Banyon Canyon has a strict "zero cocks" policy. 46 00:01:42,096 --> 00:01:44,998 I like how it... it encourages the chickens to stay inside 47 00:01:45,066 --> 00:01:46,333 but doesn't force them. 48 00:01:46,401 --> 00:01:48,001 In line with our philosophy. 49 00:01:48,069 --> 00:01:50,871 Who are we to tell the children what to learn and when? 50 00:01:51,638 --> 00:01:52,673 Their teachers? 51 00:01:53,451 --> 00:01:56,009 Williamsburg ate my seaweed, Genevieve. 52 00:01:56,077 --> 00:01:57,344 No, I didn't. 53 00:01:57,412 --> 00:01:59,379 Don, Williamsburg, do I have your permission 54 00:01:59,447 --> 00:02:01,498 to move this conflict to the Feelings Farm? 55 00:02:02,334 --> 00:02:05,152 W-Wait, Jess, we sit on the floor. 56 00:02:05,220 --> 00:02:07,693 Chairs are reserved for the children's feelings. 57 00:02:07,718 --> 00:02:08,441 Oh. 58 00:02:08,466 --> 00:02:11,559 This is much better than solving problems the Coolidge way. 59 00:02:11,584 --> 00:02:12,826 There's a fight in the gym! 60 00:02:12,894 --> 00:02:13,827 Oh, my God! 61 00:02:13,895 --> 00:02:14,912 I got this, Jess. 62 00:02:14,937 --> 00:02:18,498 Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight! 63 00:02:21,563 --> 00:02:24,665 I've been thinking about starting to wear a watch again. 64 00:02:25,248 --> 00:02:28,942 Let me open the barn door and welcome Honesty. 65 00:02:29,010 --> 00:02:31,211 Hi, Honesty. 66 00:02:31,279 --> 00:02:33,580 Williamsburg, now, Honesty is here 67 00:02:33,648 --> 00:02:36,652 and has no agenda but to listen. 68 00:02:36,677 --> 00:02:39,269 Honesty, I ate the seaweed. 69 00:02:39,294 --> 00:02:40,420 And I'm sorry. 70 00:02:40,488 --> 00:02:43,380 And, Don, do you have anything to say to Honesty? 71 00:02:43,405 --> 00:02:46,393 Honesty, sorry for being so macho. 72 00:02:46,461 --> 00:02:48,729 I'm sorry I picked you last for touch basket. 73 00:02:48,796 --> 00:02:52,165 I'm sorry I insulted you for having a mommy and daddy. 74 00:02:52,233 --> 00:02:53,400 Beautiful, Jess. 75 00:02:53,468 --> 00:02:54,401 Well done. 76 00:02:54,469 --> 00:02:55,168 Thank you. 77 00:02:56,070 --> 00:02:57,519 Into quarantine, you. 78 00:02:57,544 --> 00:02:58,672 Huge presentation 79 00:02:58,740 --> 00:02:59,673 at Ass-Strat tomorrow, 80 00:02:59,741 --> 00:03:01,174 and I cannot be sick for it. 81 00:03:01,242 --> 00:03:03,510 Women I work with hate weakness. 82 00:03:03,578 --> 00:03:06,630 You show up sick, you-you might as well be dead. 83 00:03:09,717 --> 00:03:11,985 Uh, I'm... I'm so sorry. 84 00:03:12,053 --> 00:03:13,320 No, uh, it wasn't really... 85 00:03:13,388 --> 00:03:14,475 Get out. 86 00:03:15,723 --> 00:03:17,457 Guys, I'm on the mend. 87 00:03:17,525 --> 00:03:18,258 Sorry, Nick. 88 00:03:19,319 --> 00:03:21,395 Winston here has got that hot coffee date tomorrow, so... 89 00:03:21,462 --> 00:03:23,964 But, to be clear, the date's hot, not the coffee. 90 00:03:24,032 --> 00:03:25,265 Uh, thinking about going iced. 91 00:03:25,333 --> 00:03:26,633 Don't look at my hands. 92 00:03:26,701 --> 00:03:29,105 - Thanks for backing me up, boo. - Oh, you know how boo do. 93 00:03:29,130 --> 00:03:30,973 You know who's my boo? I got a clue it's you. 94 00:03:30,998 --> 00:03:31,980 Aw... 95 00:03:38,148 --> 00:03:39,064 So... 96 00:03:40,048 --> 00:03:42,449 this is the most time we've ever spent alone. 97 00:03:43,115 --> 00:03:45,452 Pretty interesting observation on your part. 98 00:03:45,520 --> 00:03:46,787 Yeah. 99 00:03:46,990 --> 00:03:48,622 What are we... what are we watching? 100 00:03:48,690 --> 00:03:50,326 We are having a... 101 00:03:50,351 --> 00:03:53,369 I just started streaming it, and now it won't stop playing. 102 00:03:53,394 --> 00:03:55,329 Boy, ham sandwiches. 103 00:03:56,397 --> 00:03:57,531 What is it? 104 00:03:57,598 --> 00:03:58,865 It's hard to say. 105 00:03:58,933 --> 00:04:00,467 It's either a puppet show for kids, 106 00:04:00,535 --> 00:04:02,402 or it's North Korean propaganda. 107 00:04:04,906 --> 00:04:06,073 Pretty weird. 108 00:04:12,271 --> 00:04:13,947 I feel like we have a real connection. 109 00:04:14,015 --> 00:04:14,787 Me, too. 110 00:04:14,812 --> 00:04:17,117 I know it's only the first day of your trial period, 111 00:04:17,185 --> 00:04:19,692 but my gut is telling me... 112 00:04:20,855 --> 00:04:22,322 you're a perfect fit. 113 00:04:22,390 --> 00:04:24,324 I just... like, I'm so happy here, I could cry, 114 00:04:24,392 --> 00:04:25,692 but the gray water bucket's too far away, 115 00:04:25,760 --> 00:04:27,961 and I want to save my tears to water these plants. 116 00:04:28,029 --> 00:04:29,296 That's considerate. Ooh! 117 00:04:29,544 --> 00:04:30,964 My partner's here to pick me up. 118 00:04:31,032 --> 00:04:32,377 I think you're gonna really like him. 119 00:04:32,402 --> 00:04:33,535 Sorry I'm late. 120 00:04:33,560 --> 00:04:35,302 The string came out of my prayer beads, 121 00:04:35,370 --> 00:04:36,503 and they just bounced all over the office. 122 00:04:36,571 --> 00:04:37,704 - Oh... - So frustrating. 123 00:04:37,772 --> 00:04:39,306 Sam, I want you to meet Jess. 124 00:04:39,374 --> 00:04:41,308 This is the candidate we were discussing in the shower. 125 00:04:41,376 --> 00:04:43,410 - Yeah. - Jess, this is Sam, my partner. 126 00:04:45,580 --> 00:04:46,732 Hey, Jess. 127 00:04:49,250 --> 00:04:51,518 You're a doctor for children. 128 00:04:51,586 --> 00:04:52,953 Uh, it's, you know, mostly paperwork. 129 00:04:53,021 --> 00:04:56,189 How do you always look so beautiful in the morning? 130 00:04:57,525 --> 00:04:59,936 Oh, my God. 131 00:04:59,961 --> 00:05:01,128 You could have killed him. 132 00:05:01,195 --> 00:05:02,502 I'm gonna kick your ass, man. 133 00:05:02,527 --> 00:05:03,794 - Hi, Sam. - Hi. 134 00:05:05,752 --> 00:05:07,018 Have you met before? 135 00:05:07,368 --> 00:05:08,997 We... Yeah, we've met. 136 00:05:09,022 --> 00:05:10,804 We did. Yes, that's right, we met, we met. 137 00:05:10,872 --> 00:05:13,184 - How funny. - Um, a bunch of times. 138 00:05:13,209 --> 00:05:14,637 A lot of times. Very many. A lot of times. 139 00:05:14,662 --> 00:05:16,043 We met a lot... Yeah. 140 00:05:16,068 --> 00:05:17,811 Sometimes in the day, sometimes... 141 00:05:18,201 --> 00:05:20,781 in the, uh, nighttime. 142 00:05:20,848 --> 00:05:22,282 - Oh. - It was, you know... 143 00:05:22,350 --> 00:05:23,567 Yeah, we, I mean... 144 00:05:28,959 --> 00:05:29,849 Yeah. 145 00:05:31,092 --> 00:05:32,462 Oh. 146 00:05:33,738 --> 00:05:34,694 Bye, Jess. 147 00:05:34,762 --> 00:05:36,170 Nice to see you. 148 00:05:40,317 --> 00:05:44,035 The fly shirts and the even more fly shirts. 149 00:05:44,036 --> 00:05:45,411 Okay, let's make this quick. 150 00:05:45,435 --> 00:05:46,835 I need to work on my presentation. 151 00:05:46,903 --> 00:05:47,936 It's for a chair company, 152 00:05:48,004 --> 00:05:49,338 and it's tentatively titled, 153 00:05:49,405 --> 00:05:51,406 "I Hope You're Sitting Down for This." 154 00:05:52,481 --> 00:05:54,042 - 'Cause it's chairs. - Yeah. 155 00:05:54,110 --> 00:05:55,377 At which point you would laugh if you weren't 156 00:05:55,445 --> 00:05:56,712 so preoccupied with your date. 157 00:05:56,779 --> 00:05:59,047 Okay, Winston, what are you wearing? 158 00:05:59,115 --> 00:06:00,255 Well, you know, I don't want to overthink it. 159 00:06:00,280 --> 00:06:02,214 It's just coffee, so... 160 00:06:02,239 --> 00:06:03,988 So you're going to just dress like you did today, 161 00:06:04,013 --> 00:06:05,948 which apparently happened during a solar eclipse 162 00:06:06,015 --> 00:06:07,282 in a land of no mirrors. 163 00:06:07,575 --> 00:06:08,762 Good note. Strong note. 164 00:06:08,787 --> 00:06:09,994 - Winston, listen to me. - Yeah. 165 00:06:10,019 --> 00:06:11,286 This is the first date 166 00:06:11,354 --> 00:06:13,128 since the... since the Aly heartbreak. 167 00:06:13,153 --> 00:06:14,472 This date is going to define 168 00:06:14,497 --> 00:06:16,989 the next chapter of your dating story. 169 00:06:21,286 --> 00:06:23,332 Wear these magnificent sunglasses. 170 00:06:23,399 --> 00:06:24,399 Put 'em on. 171 00:06:24,467 --> 00:06:25,622 Oh, man. 172 00:06:26,336 --> 00:06:27,936 You look like Brad Pitt on a tank. 173 00:06:28,004 --> 00:06:29,838 - In that movie Furry. - Yeah. 174 00:06:29,906 --> 00:06:32,274 - You ever see Furry? - Furry? Nah. 175 00:06:32,342 --> 00:06:34,176 It's a bunch of dudes on a tank. They're, uh... 176 00:06:34,243 --> 00:06:35,577 and they're outnumbered and they shoot a bunch of people. 177 00:06:35,645 --> 00:06:36,878 Are they dressed in...? 178 00:06:36,946 --> 00:06:38,113 You should check it out. Just look it up, Furry. 179 00:06:38,181 --> 00:06:39,848 Google "Furry," nice, yeah. 180 00:06:39,916 --> 00:06:41,583 Hey, don't screw up this date, it's important. 181 00:06:51,772 --> 00:06:53,862 How is Genevieve dating Sam? 182 00:06:54,086 --> 00:06:56,184 Is Los Angeles that small? 183 00:06:56,465 --> 00:06:57,866 You guys even listening to me? 184 00:06:57,934 --> 00:06:58,834 Yeah, we're listening. 185 00:07:00,395 --> 00:07:01,503 What-what did Queen Ta Ta say? 186 00:07:01,571 --> 00:07:02,838 Well, the ball's tonight, 187 00:07:02,905 --> 00:07:04,808 and Queen Ta Ta's got nothing to wear, 188 00:07:04,833 --> 00:07:06,108 so she's got to find a dress. 189 00:07:06,575 --> 00:07:07,943 What the hell is this show? 190 00:07:08,011 --> 00:07:09,222 Poppycock Palace. 191 00:07:09,247 --> 00:07:09,945 It's amazing. 192 00:07:10,013 --> 00:07:11,279 Winston, when did you get sick? 193 00:07:11,347 --> 00:07:12,514 You were fine this morning. 194 00:07:12,582 --> 00:07:14,349 Oh, yeah, I'm super sick. 195 00:07:15,752 --> 00:07:17,853 Genevieve just said, "Oh." 196 00:07:17,920 --> 00:07:19,087 Oh's, like, the worst. 197 00:07:19,155 --> 00:07:20,088 What should I do? 198 00:07:20,156 --> 00:07:21,223 - Don't do anything. - Just do nothing. 199 00:07:21,290 --> 00:07:22,557 You're just gonna make it worse. 200 00:07:22,710 --> 00:07:24,058 Leave it alone, Jess. 201 00:07:24,223 --> 00:07:25,112 Oh, I know. 202 00:07:25,137 --> 00:07:26,926 I could go talk to Sam. 203 00:07:27,137 --> 00:07:29,198 I could ask him to put in a good word for me. 204 00:07:29,223 --> 00:07:31,130 How long does it take to get over a breakup? 205 00:07:31,348 --> 00:07:33,144 Two years? Two years is enough, right? 206 00:07:33,169 --> 00:07:34,102 - I swear to God, just leave it alone. - Let it lie. 207 00:07:34,170 --> 00:07:35,103 Do nothing, Jess. 208 00:07:35,171 --> 00:07:36,669 Four votes for leaving it alone. 209 00:07:36,694 --> 00:07:37,628 That's what I'll do. 210 00:07:41,344 --> 00:07:43,111 I'll just do nothing. 211 00:07:44,434 --> 00:07:45,247 Hi. 212 00:07:46,816 --> 00:07:49,052 I couldn't do nothing. 213 00:07:51,954 --> 00:07:54,456 We must find this Tee-Tee Wah Wah... 214 00:07:56,092 --> 00:07:57,926 Humina humina humina humina... 215 00:08:03,599 --> 00:08:06,068 All these puppets do is sing about how they're friends. 216 00:08:06,505 --> 00:08:08,236 I'm starting to not believe them. 217 00:08:08,304 --> 00:08:09,337 Shh! 218 00:08:09,405 --> 00:08:10,739 This is the best part. 219 00:08:10,807 --> 00:08:13,675 The Tee-Tee Wah Wah was in... 220 00:08:17,747 --> 00:08:19,339 It's in the damn Pee-Paw Playhouse! 221 00:08:19,364 --> 00:08:20,749 - Shh. - Spoiler alert, man. 222 00:08:20,817 --> 00:08:23,418 The Pee-Paw Playhouse! 223 00:08:25,262 --> 00:08:26,088 Every time. 224 00:08:26,155 --> 00:08:27,089 I've been saying that for the past hour 225 00:08:27,156 --> 00:08:28,401 'cause I saw you put it in there! 226 00:08:28,426 --> 00:08:29,253 You know what? 227 00:08:29,278 --> 00:08:31,293 I can't. I can not. 228 00:08:31,360 --> 00:08:32,461 I'm not sick. 229 00:08:32,528 --> 00:08:33,528 I've been faking it. 230 00:08:33,596 --> 00:08:35,161 There you go, Poppycock Palace. 231 00:08:35,186 --> 00:08:36,262 You've outed me! 232 00:08:36,287 --> 00:08:38,733 - You're choosing to be in here? - Why? 233 00:08:38,801 --> 00:08:40,335 'Cause I'm freaking out about the date. Okay? 234 00:08:40,403 --> 00:08:42,137 Why don't you want to go on this date? 235 00:08:42,578 --> 00:08:44,011 Because I'm not over Aly. 236 00:08:44,036 --> 00:08:45,631 And I know I should be moving on 237 00:08:45,708 --> 00:08:47,175 and this girl is okay, 238 00:08:47,243 --> 00:08:48,343 but she's not Aly. 239 00:08:48,411 --> 00:08:49,244 No one is Aly. 240 00:08:50,528 --> 00:08:51,573 What'd she say? 241 00:08:51,598 --> 00:08:52,481 Wait. 242 00:08:52,548 --> 00:08:53,482 Just hold. 243 00:08:53,549 --> 00:08:54,516 Oh, please don't blow your nose. 244 00:08:54,584 --> 00:08:55,517 You do it so disgustingly. 245 00:09:00,387 --> 00:09:01,425 Not done. 246 00:09:01,450 --> 00:09:03,191 I don't need to know that bad what you said. 247 00:09:10,366 --> 00:09:12,000 I'm beggin' you to stop. Just stop. 248 00:09:15,770 --> 00:09:17,239 No one is Aly. 249 00:09:17,306 --> 00:09:19,948 Okay? You have to give other people a chance. 250 00:09:19,973 --> 00:09:21,409 You deserve to be happy, Winston. 251 00:09:21,477 --> 00:09:22,744 Just go on the date. 252 00:09:22,812 --> 00:09:24,880 Or I could fire up another episode 253 00:09:24,947 --> 00:09:27,516 and we could see where they hide the Tee-Tee Wah Wah this time. 254 00:09:27,583 --> 00:09:29,498 I wonder where it would be. 255 00:09:34,157 --> 00:09:35,757 No, I'm-I'm gonna go on the date. 256 00:09:36,176 --> 00:09:37,482 Yeah, I think I'll do that. 257 00:09:37,507 --> 00:09:38,440 You guys are right. 258 00:09:38,465 --> 00:09:39,060 Could you tell your future husband 259 00:09:39,128 --> 00:09:40,262 to let me out of this room, please? 260 00:09:40,329 --> 00:09:41,270 I love that man, 261 00:09:41,295 --> 00:09:43,031 but he is not letting anyone out of this room. 262 00:09:43,099 --> 00:09:44,299 Just being in here 263 00:09:44,367 --> 00:09:45,967 makes you fully contaminated. 264 00:09:47,872 --> 00:09:49,304 Uh, hey, I was hoping 265 00:09:49,372 --> 00:09:51,039 you could put in a good word for me. 266 00:09:51,107 --> 00:09:52,040 I know you're mad... 267 00:09:52,108 --> 00:09:53,441 No, I'm not mad, Jess. 268 00:09:53,509 --> 00:09:55,973 I'm just, you know, bummed that you're at my house. 269 00:09:55,998 --> 00:09:58,923 Obviously, I know I messed up our relationship 270 00:09:58,948 --> 00:10:01,416 and you probably think I'm a bad person, 271 00:10:01,484 --> 00:10:03,051 - but if you could... - Jess! 272 00:10:03,452 --> 00:10:04,958 What are you doing here? 273 00:10:05,708 --> 00:10:07,155 At my lover's house? 274 00:10:08,270 --> 00:10:09,391 Oh! 275 00:10:09,458 --> 00:10:10,926 Hi! Hi. 276 00:10:10,993 --> 00:10:13,296 - Um, were you... - Making love? 277 00:10:13,321 --> 00:10:14,488 Just finished. 278 00:10:15,160 --> 00:10:17,094 He defused me like a bomb. 279 00:10:19,602 --> 00:10:20,635 That sounds nice. 280 00:10:20,703 --> 00:10:22,038 - Um... - Did you bake... 281 00:10:22,705 --> 00:10:24,139 Sam brownies? 282 00:10:24,207 --> 00:10:26,608 No. Chocolate's way too sexual. 283 00:10:28,211 --> 00:10:30,178 This is just good, old-fashioned Kansas cornbread. 284 00:10:38,354 --> 00:10:39,287 Jess... 285 00:10:39,355 --> 00:10:41,223 No. 286 00:10:41,290 --> 00:10:43,147 ...my gut is telling me 287 00:10:44,227 --> 00:10:45,961 this isn't going to work out. 288 00:10:46,028 --> 00:10:47,796 Please give me a chance to make this right. 289 00:10:47,863 --> 00:10:48,797 Five minutes. 290 00:10:48,864 --> 00:10:52,500 Mmm... 291 00:10:52,997 --> 00:10:57,134 Mmm... 292 00:11:09,560 --> 00:11:10,560 Okay, good morning. 293 00:11:10,833 --> 00:11:13,224 Yes, help yourself to a bagel. 294 00:11:13,411 --> 00:11:14,202 Hmm. 295 00:11:14,270 --> 00:11:15,403 They're all the same, Jan. 296 00:11:15,471 --> 00:11:17,105 No need to put your hands on every one of them. 297 00:11:17,173 --> 00:11:18,653 Okay, ladies and gentlemen, 298 00:11:18,803 --> 00:11:20,391 as you know, 299 00:11:20,810 --> 00:11:24,941 on the seventh day, God... he rested. 300 00:11:25,568 --> 00:11:26,683 Yes, that's right. 301 00:11:26,708 --> 00:11:27,975 God rested on the seventh day. 302 00:11:28,043 --> 00:11:29,536 But the question remains: 303 00:11:29,561 --> 00:11:30,928 what did he rest on? 304 00:11:31,544 --> 00:11:32,675 That's right. 305 00:11:32,700 --> 00:11:36,072 He rested... on a chair. 306 00:11:40,219 --> 00:11:41,397 Oh... 307 00:11:45,060 --> 00:11:46,160 Look underneath your butts. 308 00:11:46,443 --> 00:11:49,307 You will find mankind's greatest invention. 309 00:11:49,332 --> 00:11:51,166 Without chairs, do you know what we have? 310 00:11:51,185 --> 00:11:53,494 Squat, both position and diddly kind. 311 00:11:53,854 --> 00:11:55,894 Sam, you got rid of your sofa. 312 00:11:55,919 --> 00:11:57,857 Boy, that thing really gave me a rash. 313 00:11:57,925 --> 00:11:58,891 Five minutes, Jess. 314 00:11:58,959 --> 00:11:59,825 Okay, look. 315 00:11:59,850 --> 00:12:00,888 I know it's weird to hire 316 00:12:00,913 --> 00:12:02,371 your boyfriend's ex-girlfriend, 317 00:12:02,396 --> 00:12:04,441 but I think it's another way 318 00:12:04,466 --> 00:12:05,833 in which we are linked. 319 00:12:05,858 --> 00:12:08,601 You are the best candidate we've had in a long time. 320 00:12:08,669 --> 00:12:10,269 - Thank you. - As we all know, 321 00:12:10,337 --> 00:12:11,957 healing is talking. 322 00:12:12,406 --> 00:12:13,973 Samuel, what do you think? 323 00:12:14,041 --> 00:12:15,274 I would love to explore all of this with you, 324 00:12:15,342 --> 00:12:16,976 but I have a circumcision to perform. 325 00:12:17,044 --> 00:12:18,377 Hopefully not your own. 326 00:12:19,891 --> 00:12:22,134 Just kidding. I know you're circumcised. 327 00:12:22,683 --> 00:12:24,184 Ha, ha. Yeah. 328 00:12:24,209 --> 00:12:26,043 Well, not that I think about it, it just... 329 00:12:26,068 --> 00:12:28,564 I mean, I'm definitely not picturing it right now. 330 00:12:28,589 --> 00:12:29,583 I am picturing it. 331 00:12:29,608 --> 00:12:30,941 Only 'cause we talked about it. 332 00:12:31,067 --> 00:12:33,035 How long did you two share your journeys? 333 00:12:33,060 --> 00:12:34,861 - Couple months. - But at first it was just sex. 334 00:12:34,928 --> 00:12:36,429 Mmm. Mmm. 335 00:12:36,497 --> 00:12:37,497 I used sex 336 00:12:37,564 --> 00:12:39,565 as a wall around my heart. 337 00:12:39,633 --> 00:12:40,497 Mmm. 338 00:12:40,521 --> 00:12:43,145 Uh, Jess climbed that wall many, many times. 339 00:12:43,170 --> 00:12:45,004 - Mmm. - Uh, couldn't stop climbing it. 340 00:12:45,072 --> 00:12:46,849 I think I was not the only climber to climb that wall. 341 00:12:46,874 --> 00:12:48,005 Until we decided to become 342 00:12:48,030 --> 00:12:50,699 a one-wall, one-climber mountain. 343 00:12:50,724 --> 00:12:52,578 And then you invited another climber 344 00:12:52,646 --> 00:12:54,280 to lick your toehold. 345 00:12:54,899 --> 00:12:57,894 My roommate, Nick, kissed me. 346 00:12:57,919 --> 00:12:59,019 I'm so sorry, Sam. 347 00:12:59,087 --> 00:13:00,087 I exist only in the present. 348 00:13:00,154 --> 00:13:01,188 All of that's behind me. 349 00:13:01,256 --> 00:13:03,123 What... what about this Nick? 350 00:13:03,747 --> 00:13:04,758 Is he sorry? 351 00:13:04,826 --> 00:13:06,894 I think Nick's kind of still upset 352 00:13:06,961 --> 00:13:08,395 that Sam punched him in the throat. 353 00:13:08,611 --> 00:13:09,653 What? 354 00:13:09,678 --> 00:13:10,612 Sam... 355 00:13:10,637 --> 00:13:12,232 so tender and delicate... 356 00:13:12,300 --> 00:13:13,433 You haven't met Nick. 357 00:13:13,501 --> 00:13:15,667 He's just the most throat-punchable boy 358 00:13:15,692 --> 00:13:16,527 in all the world. 359 00:13:16,552 --> 00:13:18,071 I don't care. I don't even... 360 00:13:18,139 --> 00:13:19,740 Nick is a whatever, I don't even have to... 361 00:13:19,807 --> 00:13:21,833 Sam, do you need this Nick to apologize for wounding you? 362 00:13:21,858 --> 00:13:22,638 I do. 363 00:13:23,811 --> 00:13:25,019 So, Nick... 364 00:13:25,044 --> 00:13:26,280 I'm wondering if you could 365 00:13:26,347 --> 00:13:27,848 come in the other room with me 366 00:13:27,916 --> 00:13:29,283 and just, like, real quick, 367 00:13:29,350 --> 00:13:30,684 apologize to Sam for kissing me? 368 00:13:30,752 --> 00:13:31,474 No. 369 00:13:31,499 --> 00:13:33,353 Jess, I told you to leave it alone. 370 00:13:33,421 --> 00:13:34,688 I didn't, though. 371 00:13:34,756 --> 00:13:35,756 I made it worse. 372 00:13:35,823 --> 00:13:36,990 Now the only way 373 00:13:37,058 --> 00:13:38,859 I'm gonna get that job 374 00:13:38,927 --> 00:13:41,895 is if Nick apologizes to Sam. 375 00:13:41,963 --> 00:13:43,330 Jess, he hit me. He's gonna hit me again. 376 00:13:43,398 --> 00:13:44,398 He's not gonna hit you. 377 00:13:44,465 --> 00:13:46,133 Please, it's my dream job. 378 00:13:49,037 --> 00:13:51,505 I'd like to apologize, Nick, 379 00:13:51,573 --> 00:13:53,307 for punching you in the throat. 380 00:13:53,374 --> 00:13:54,474 I know it hurt a whole lot. 381 00:13:54,542 --> 00:13:55,576 Not that much, but you did it, so... 382 00:13:55,643 --> 00:13:56,743 Okay. 383 00:13:56,811 --> 00:13:59,714 And I feel like you should apologize to me 384 00:13:59,739 --> 00:14:01,277 for kissing my girlfriend. 385 00:14:01,302 --> 00:14:02,649 Yes, uh, right. 386 00:14:02,717 --> 00:14:03,650 Cool. 387 00:14:04,852 --> 00:14:06,587 Well, that went so well. 388 00:14:06,654 --> 00:14:09,656 I-I don't really feel like that was a genuine apology, 389 00:14:09,724 --> 00:14:11,124 and-and I'd really like one. 390 00:14:11,192 --> 00:14:13,011 - Yeah. - I mean... did you feel like it was genuine? 391 00:14:13,036 --> 00:14:14,777 Actually, he didn't even apologize. 392 00:14:14,802 --> 00:14:16,330 Cool beard, Sam. 393 00:14:17,122 --> 00:14:19,144 What'd you just say about my beard, bro? 394 00:14:19,169 --> 00:14:19,900 "Bro"? 395 00:14:19,968 --> 00:14:21,234 Yeah, I just said "cool beard." 396 00:14:21,302 --> 00:14:22,736 I think your beard looks really cool. 397 00:14:23,216 --> 00:14:25,572 Talk about my beard one more time, bro. 398 00:14:25,640 --> 00:14:27,140 Sam, "bro" is a beach term. 399 00:14:27,208 --> 00:14:29,910 - The beard is very fun. - Say "beard." 400 00:14:29,935 --> 00:14:31,059 You want me to say the word 401 00:14:31,084 --> 00:14:32,411 that starts with a "B," 402 00:14:32,436 --> 00:14:33,369 - ends with a "D"? - Yeah. 403 00:14:33,394 --> 00:14:34,828 Say "beard" one more time, bro. 404 00:14:38,486 --> 00:14:40,067 Say the word "beard," bro! 405 00:14:41,986 --> 00:14:43,357 Beard. 406 00:14:43,424 --> 00:14:45,459 Oh! Oh! 407 00:14:45,716 --> 00:14:46,893 Nick, are you dying? 408 00:14:46,961 --> 00:14:48,028 'Cause it looks like you're dying! 409 00:14:48,096 --> 00:14:49,062 Not dying. 410 00:14:49,130 --> 00:14:50,855 - Who are you? - I don't know what it is. 411 00:14:50,880 --> 00:14:52,132 I just can't help it with this guy. 412 00:14:52,200 --> 00:14:53,367 Why didn't you just hit me in the nads 413 00:14:53,434 --> 00:14:54,800 like a normal person, Sam? 414 00:14:54,825 --> 00:14:56,570 Well, I'm leaving. 415 00:14:56,638 --> 00:14:58,372 Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait! Don't, don't go! 416 00:14:58,439 --> 00:14:59,356 Nobody goes. 417 00:14:59,381 --> 00:15:00,755 Jim Morrison. 418 00:15:01,075 --> 00:15:01,934 That's who you look like. 419 00:15:01,959 --> 00:15:03,677 We are solving this conflict 420 00:15:03,745 --> 00:15:06,208 in the mother-loving Feelings Farm. 421 00:15:14,303 --> 00:15:16,552 Those sunglasses are amazing. 422 00:15:16,577 --> 00:15:18,083 Well, they're made even more amazing 423 00:15:18,108 --> 00:15:19,575 by your reflection in them. 424 00:15:19,643 --> 00:15:22,044 Wait, how are you seeing my reflection in them? 425 00:15:22,882 --> 00:15:24,315 You got me. I'm not. 426 00:15:25,070 --> 00:15:26,068 I'm just running game. 427 00:15:26,092 --> 00:15:28,076 Are you this smooth-talking in regular glasses? 428 00:15:28,092 --> 00:15:29,779 No, I'm not that smooth-talking, no. 429 00:15:30,100 --> 00:15:31,861 I'm not. I'm not gonna lie to you. 430 00:15:32,225 --> 00:15:33,229 Honesty, 431 00:15:33,297 --> 00:15:36,099 I stole coffee from a bagel restaurant. 432 00:15:36,889 --> 00:15:38,868 Um, I didn't know how the line worked. 433 00:15:38,893 --> 00:15:40,903 Okay, now I've talked. 434 00:15:40,971 --> 00:15:42,472 Uh, who wants to go next... Sam? 435 00:15:42,539 --> 00:15:44,037 Sure, uh, Honesty, 436 00:15:44,062 --> 00:15:47,477 I honestly want Nick to apologize for kissing Jess. 437 00:15:47,544 --> 00:15:49,045 I did apologize, Sam. 438 00:15:49,113 --> 00:15:52,181 Real, real quick... you have to address Honesty directly. 439 00:15:52,249 --> 00:15:54,083 You want me to talk to a chair? 440 00:15:54,151 --> 00:15:55,251 I don't want to. 441 00:15:55,319 --> 00:15:56,619 Hey, you like soup? 442 00:15:56,687 --> 00:15:58,154 Right? You like soup, right? 443 00:15:58,222 --> 00:15:59,489 Of course I like soup. 444 00:15:59,556 --> 00:16:00,857 All right, well, address the chair 445 00:16:00,924 --> 00:16:02,239 and I'll make you some soup. 446 00:16:02,264 --> 00:16:03,359 No strings attached. 447 00:16:03,427 --> 00:16:04,527 Well, except for the string of the chair. 448 00:16:04,595 --> 00:16:05,212 All right. 449 00:16:06,803 --> 00:16:08,197 Honesty, 450 00:16:08,678 --> 00:16:11,034 I'm, uh, sorry I ki... 451 00:16:11,101 --> 00:16:12,301 You know what? I'm not. 452 00:16:12,369 --> 00:16:15,038 I'm not sorry that I kissed your girlfriend. 453 00:16:15,826 --> 00:16:17,709 'Cause, first of all, she wanted me to! 454 00:16:18,193 --> 00:16:19,542 And it was fun. 455 00:16:19,920 --> 00:16:20,877 It felt great. 456 00:16:21,451 --> 00:16:23,098 And then we dated for a long time 457 00:16:23,123 --> 00:16:24,284 and that was fun. 458 00:16:24,982 --> 00:16:27,163 You were out of the picture, not even in her thoughts. 459 00:16:27,639 --> 00:16:29,686 It was a whole new thing. We just, we fell in love 460 00:16:29,753 --> 00:16:31,788 with each other, like crazy love... like, 461 00:16:31,855 --> 00:16:34,357 a lot of good memories, a lot of passion. 462 00:16:34,701 --> 00:16:36,537 - A lot of good sex. - Nick. 463 00:16:36,562 --> 00:16:39,262 We once tried to sneak into the Kids' Choice Awards, 464 00:16:39,329 --> 00:16:42,031 and we got in and watched a bunch of kids 465 00:16:42,099 --> 00:16:43,387 get awards. 466 00:16:45,826 --> 00:16:46,869 So, yeah. 467 00:16:46,937 --> 00:16:47,870 - Nick. - Topped... 468 00:16:47,938 --> 00:16:49,806 - Okay. - I have a fever of 103 469 00:16:49,873 --> 00:16:51,764 and I'm talking to a chair and I'm not a great talk... 470 00:16:51,788 --> 00:16:52,375 O-Okay. 471 00:16:52,376 --> 00:16:53,631 Cool, cool. 472 00:16:53,655 --> 00:16:54,510 Well, I think everything's good then. 473 00:16:54,511 --> 00:16:55,945 Sam, I can feel you holding back. 474 00:16:56,013 --> 00:16:57,814 If you can't be honest now 475 00:16:57,881 --> 00:17:00,215 in this strange place to that hideous chair, 476 00:17:00,240 --> 00:17:02,356 how can I trust you with my mind, 477 00:17:02,381 --> 00:17:03,753 my breasts 478 00:17:04,303 --> 00:17:05,855 and my precious yoni. 479 00:17:05,923 --> 00:17:07,256 Sounds like it's full of yarn. 480 00:17:07,324 --> 00:17:09,325 Okay, fine. Honesty, all right, 481 00:17:09,393 --> 00:17:11,594 I... had a really hard time 482 00:17:11,662 --> 00:17:14,715 opening up to someone and then I met Jess 483 00:17:14,740 --> 00:17:15,245 and... 484 00:17:15,999 --> 00:17:17,433 and I thought we were... 485 00:17:19,403 --> 00:17:20,770 We were great together. 486 00:17:21,670 --> 00:17:23,039 And then Nick kissed her, 487 00:17:23,107 --> 00:17:25,775 and I-I went down kind of a weird path. 488 00:17:25,843 --> 00:17:27,677 I gained 85 pounds. 489 00:17:27,745 --> 00:17:29,812 And then I lost, like, 100. 490 00:17:29,880 --> 00:17:31,029 I had no idea. 491 00:17:31,054 --> 00:17:33,222 Poured almost all my money into silkworms. 492 00:17:33,467 --> 00:17:34,550 They froze to death. 493 00:17:34,618 --> 00:17:37,207 Now I'm doing yoga, meditation, 494 00:17:37,232 --> 00:17:39,582 and... I'm a vegan 495 00:17:39,607 --> 00:17:41,424 and I don't know. 496 00:17:41,951 --> 00:17:43,426 What the hell have I become? 497 00:17:43,764 --> 00:17:45,170 Look at these shoes, huh? 498 00:17:45,194 --> 00:17:47,262 Look at these ridiculous shoes! 499 00:17:47,329 --> 00:17:48,363 I like those shoes. 500 00:17:48,430 --> 00:17:49,964 They're made from recycled shoes. 501 00:17:50,032 --> 00:17:51,533 They are so dumb! 502 00:17:51,600 --> 00:17:53,621 I don't know who I am! 503 00:17:53,779 --> 00:17:56,838 I want to go back to who I was! 504 00:18:04,459 --> 00:18:06,428 There he is. 505 00:18:07,100 --> 00:18:09,348 The real Sam. 506 00:18:09,373 --> 00:18:10,420 Wow! 507 00:18:12,904 --> 00:18:15,924 What a breakthrough! Sam. 508 00:18:15,991 --> 00:18:17,692 It is an honor to meet you. 509 00:18:18,982 --> 00:18:20,495 I'm Genevieve. 510 00:18:27,123 --> 00:18:28,870 And I am also dumping you. 511 00:18:28,938 --> 00:18:30,104 Okay, that's great. 512 00:18:30,172 --> 00:18:31,639 That's perfect, yeah. 513 00:18:31,707 --> 00:18:34,395 As usual, I have had a terrible time 514 00:18:34,420 --> 00:18:35,977 in your horrible loft 515 00:18:36,045 --> 00:18:38,778 with all of you idiot people. 516 00:18:39,582 --> 00:18:41,099 Sam, wait! 517 00:18:41,483 --> 00:18:43,740 If you take your bike, will you relock mine? 518 00:18:44,529 --> 00:18:45,653 Thank you. 519 00:18:47,193 --> 00:18:49,157 Oh, Genevieve, I am so sorry. 520 00:18:49,224 --> 00:18:50,925 Don't be, don't be. 521 00:18:51,739 --> 00:18:53,474 I wanted a resolution 522 00:18:54,068 --> 00:18:55,214 and I got one. 523 00:18:55,310 --> 00:18:57,614 Now, if you'll excuse me, 524 00:18:57,639 --> 00:18:58,754 I'm going to call 525 00:18:58,779 --> 00:19:01,637 my childhood phone number and scream at whoever picks up. 526 00:19:01,662 --> 00:19:02,795 I'll see you Monday. 527 00:19:02,826 --> 00:19:04,272 Wait, I got the job? 528 00:19:05,225 --> 00:19:06,598 Of course you did. 529 00:19:06,623 --> 00:19:08,504 This was one of the most profound 530 00:19:08,529 --> 00:19:11,403 Feelings Farm I have ever been a part of. 531 00:19:11,428 --> 00:19:13,314 Radical, Jess, radical. 532 00:19:13,382 --> 00:19:14,749 Uh, yeah, I have questions 533 00:19:14,817 --> 00:19:16,250 about where to park and stuff, but you know, 534 00:19:16,318 --> 00:19:17,819 I'll just, uh, I'll text you! 535 00:19:17,886 --> 00:19:19,654 Ha! 536 00:19:19,722 --> 00:19:21,856 What if the big letter comes back? 537 00:19:21,881 --> 00:19:23,864 I can't believe it just took a high fever 538 00:19:23,889 --> 00:19:25,497 for me to like this show. 539 00:19:25,522 --> 00:19:26,689 Not if it's silent! 540 00:19:26,714 --> 00:19:27,747 Well, I hate it. 541 00:19:27,772 --> 00:19:29,540 Why is the Crispy Castle 542 00:19:29,607 --> 00:19:31,008 bigger than Mount Tummy Tum? 543 00:19:31,075 --> 00:19:32,109 It's dang gibberish. 544 00:19:32,177 --> 00:19:33,277 How was your presentation? 545 00:19:33,344 --> 00:19:35,410 Well, thank you for asking. 546 00:19:35,435 --> 00:19:36,847 It was a disaster. 547 00:19:36,915 --> 00:19:39,216 We can expect robust grow... 548 00:19:42,412 --> 00:19:44,655 Are you holding in a sneeze? 549 00:19:45,506 --> 00:19:46,859 Mm-mm. 550 00:19:50,795 --> 00:19:52,429 God, where did it even go? 551 00:19:58,837 --> 00:19:59,937 Son of a bitch. 552 00:20:00,004 --> 00:20:02,606 How did I get sick? I was so careful. 553 00:20:02,674 --> 00:20:03,907 You did the best you could. I have no idea, man. 554 00:20:03,975 --> 00:20:05,509 - We're missing Poppycock. - You guys, 555 00:20:05,577 --> 00:20:07,771 I hate that Sam's out there mad at me. 556 00:20:07,796 --> 00:20:09,163 Because he's mad at you 557 00:20:09,188 --> 00:20:11,189 or because you still have feelings for him? 558 00:20:11,225 --> 00:20:12,717 Because he's mad at me. If I could just... 559 00:20:12,733 --> 00:20:15,337 Leave it alone. Leave it alone, Jess. 560 00:20:15,362 --> 00:20:17,533 Right. You're right. 561 00:20:21,405 --> 00:20:23,506 Wow, you shaved. 562 00:20:23,574 --> 00:20:25,075 I mean, not "wow" like I like it. 563 00:20:25,142 --> 00:20:27,342 I mean... I don't not like it. 564 00:20:27,358 --> 00:20:29,459 What are you doing here? I, I don't want your cornbread. 565 00:20:29,527 --> 00:20:31,537 It's not cornbread. It's, uh, 566 00:20:32,176 --> 00:20:33,343 it's brownies. 567 00:20:33,368 --> 00:20:35,636 Um... 568 00:20:36,973 --> 00:20:40,129 Hey, I'm sorry we broke up. 569 00:20:40,154 --> 00:20:42,554 And I think for me it was just... 570 00:20:43,040 --> 00:20:44,681 weird timing. 571 00:20:45,428 --> 00:20:46,717 But I agree with you. 572 00:20:46,835 --> 00:20:47,929 We were... 573 00:20:49,004 --> 00:20:50,604 great together. 574 00:20:51,983 --> 00:20:52,916 Really great. 575 00:21:21,375 --> 00:21:24,778 Get out of my life. 576 00:21:30,649 --> 00:21:32,553 Big shift in tone there. 577 00:21:36,325 --> 00:21:38,066 Eh, Nick'll eat 'em. 39158