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00:00:02,169 --> 00:00:03,269
Synchro: mpm
2
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This sucks dick I hate swimming!
3
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Oh, just shut up and give me
a hand with this shit.
4
00:00:13,000 --> 00:00:15,509
- What the hell are you doing?
- What does it look like I'm doing?
5
00:00:15,634 --> 00:00:18,175
- I'm hiding the Jet Ski.
- Why are you hiding the Jet Ski?
6
00:00:18,300 --> 00:00:20,359
Because I told Dust... Look...
7
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I can't talk with your tits hanging
out like cabbages.
8
00:00:23,440 --> 00:00:25,091
Just give me a hand with this.
9
00:00:25,216 --> 00:00:27,774
Screw you. You threw me into
the fucking lake, Kenny.
10
00:00:31,053 --> 00:00:32,929
Now, then. I think
your body is awesome.
11
00:00:33,054 --> 00:00:36,366
You got great tits, but I'm concerned
about your bill of health.
12
00:00:36,491 --> 00:00:38,848
I'm gonna insist upon you
using some sort of protection.
13
00:00:38,973 --> 00:00:41,249
I got a dental dam in the glove
compartment of my truck.
14
00:00:41,417 --> 00:00:43,793
- You can just grab that.
- What the fuck's a dental dam?
15
00:00:43,961 --> 00:00:46,796
It's a rubber for your mouth.
It's not that big of a deal, okay?
16
00:00:47,036 --> 00:00:49,538
And besides,
it's not just for my protection.
17
00:00:49,663 --> 00:00:51,515
You don't know
what shit I got either.
18
00:00:57,372 --> 00:00:58,622
It's Pakistani.
19
00:00:59,634 --> 00:01:01,284
That's what he told me.
20
00:01:02,091 --> 00:01:04,982
How does somebody manage
to get ambushed on a Jet Ski?
21
00:01:05,107 --> 00:01:07,163
I don't know,
I guess they jumped them
22
00:01:07,288 --> 00:01:08,844
and rode off with it.
23
00:01:09,436 --> 00:01:10,934
Yeah, but I mean, it's a lake.
24
00:01:11,059 --> 00:01:13,574
There ain't exactly places
to sneak up on somebody from.
25
00:01:13,825 --> 00:01:15,742
- You'd need a scuba gear.
- I don't know.
26
00:01:15,910 --> 00:01:17,203
Or a snorkel, maybe.
27
00:01:20,168 --> 00:01:22,874
- What's he out there doing?
- Actually, I think
28
00:01:23,335 --> 00:01:25,021
he's in training...
29
00:01:26,715 --> 00:01:27,962
... for the majors.
30
00:01:28,962 --> 00:01:30,712
Going back to the majors.
31
00:01:32,686 --> 00:01:33,760
All right, boys.
32
00:01:33,928 --> 00:01:36,512
Let's get back in the baseball, okay?
Wayne.
33
00:01:36,682 --> 00:01:38,477
Keep that pistol
aimed at the strike zone,
34
00:01:38,602 --> 00:01:40,808
because that is
where this bad boy's going.
35
00:01:41,740 --> 00:01:44,386
All right.
Fly as I say fly.
36
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Do as I say do.
Master and commander.
37
00:01:53,384 --> 00:01:56,030
And the crowd goes crazy.
38
00:02:00,716 --> 00:02:02,467
- Sixty-eight.
- What did I tell you, man?
39
00:02:02,592 --> 00:02:05,505
Don't read the readout.
That'sy my own private information.
40
00:02:05,630 --> 00:02:07,804
- Why didn't you hit the target?
- Because, Dustin Jr.,
41
00:02:07,929 --> 00:02:09,613
at the last moment I decided not to.
42
00:02:09,738 --> 00:02:12,743
I decided to go for that
birdbath your dad put there.
43
00:02:13,008 --> 00:02:16,107
I'm trying so hard not to be
an asshole to you guys, okay?
44
00:02:16,232 --> 00:02:18,201
Just please work with me here.
45
00:02:18,577 --> 00:02:22,141
I'm sorry. I'm not mad at you guys
I'm disappointed with my arm
46
00:02:22,309 --> 00:02:24,615
and how it's trying
to butt-fuck me back here.
47
00:02:25,147 --> 00:02:27,546
- I hated that birdbath.
- I broke that birdbath for you,
48
00:02:27,671 --> 00:02:30,485
I knew you hated it. We're the same.
I hate that fucking thing too.
49
00:02:30,610 --> 00:02:32,382
A stork wrapped around
a tree branch.
50
00:02:32,507 --> 00:02:34,570
That's the stupidest thing
I've ever seen.
51
00:02:34,952 --> 00:02:37,389
You know, that's how the plague
started back in the day.
52
00:02:37,514 --> 00:02:40,413
It's from a little disgusting
birdbath in someone's backyard
53
00:02:40,538 --> 00:02:41,538
that rats
54
00:02:42,246 --> 00:02:43,996
made sex to birds in it
55
00:02:44,166 --> 00:02:46,249
and created a whole-new
type of AIDS.
56
00:02:46,417 --> 00:02:50,211
It's important. One time I was invited
to come to social gathering.
57
00:02:50,379 --> 00:02:53,986
I was paid a handsome amount of money
and I brought shotgun and a bottle
58
00:02:54,111 --> 00:02:57,140
and showed those people
the best fucking time they've ever seen.
59
00:02:57,265 --> 00:02:59,701
A humongous part about
being a celebrity
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00:02:59,826 --> 00:03:02,429
is cashing in on it,
making shitloads of money,
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00:03:02,554 --> 00:03:04,943
having expensive, luxurious things.
62
00:03:05,068 --> 00:03:07,569
That way, in case one day
you're not famous,
63
00:03:07,694 --> 00:03:11,213
you could still be rich as hell
and better than everyone around you.
64
00:03:26,594 --> 00:03:29,292
Wait a second, is that Kenny Powers
walking in my showroom.
65
00:03:29,531 --> 00:03:31,312
- Quite possibly
- How are you doing?
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00:03:31,437 --> 00:03:34,386
- Who am I speaking to here?
- Ashley Schaeffer, BMW.
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Damn fine to meet you.
68
00:03:36,186 --> 00:03:38,175
- I take it you own this place.
- I sure do.
69
00:03:38,345 --> 00:03:40,094
That's why my name's
on that building.
70
00:03:40,262 --> 00:03:42,451
I thought Ashley Schaeffer
was gonna be a woman
71
00:03:42,576 --> 00:03:45,182
I love women
I'll take that as a compliment.
72
00:03:45,394 --> 00:03:46,800
Take it as you will.
73
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- I will.
- You should.
74
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I am. I'm taking it.
75
00:03:52,072 --> 00:03:54,635
- It's a pretty nice showroom.
- Thank you. We have a lot of pride.
76
00:03:54,760 --> 00:03:57,403
We've done a lot of work lately.
Complete renovations.
77
00:03:57,571 --> 00:04:00,564
We got beautiful cars.
Beautiful surroundings.
78
00:04:01,214 --> 00:04:02,514
Beautiful women.
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00:04:02,868 --> 00:04:05,718
- Yeah, they are pretty.
- They're my closers.
80
00:04:06,092 --> 00:04:07,621
And they help people who are
81
00:04:07,791 --> 00:04:09,623
slightly hesitant to buy cars.
82
00:04:09,748 --> 00:04:11,959
So if you happen to be a man,
Ashley over there
83
00:04:12,127 --> 00:04:13,584
will suck your dick.
84
00:04:13,818 --> 00:04:15,197
I like how you work.
85
00:04:15,322 --> 00:04:18,674
If you're a woman, Scott will
finger you with his penis.
86
00:04:20,679 --> 00:04:23,095
That's the kind of fun and games
we have around here.
87
00:04:23,265 --> 00:04:25,362
Oh, you... You get it done?
88
00:04:25,487 --> 00:04:28,619
That was... That's not what you do,
not in my neighborhood.
89
00:04:28,744 --> 00:04:30,232
That's what we do around here.
90
00:04:30,357 --> 00:04:32,224
- No, that's not...
- That's what we do here.
91
00:04:32,349 --> 00:04:34,876
We're having fun.
It's so good to have you in here.
92
00:04:35,001 --> 00:04:37,443
- Well, I'm gonna cut to the chase.
- Please, do.
93
00:04:37,817 --> 00:04:39,067
I'm an athlete.
94
00:04:39,321 --> 00:04:41,171
But I'm also a businessman.
95
00:04:41,570 --> 00:04:43,470
You got a classy joint here.
96
00:04:44,345 --> 00:04:46,795
And you're trying
to lure costumers in
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00:04:47,336 --> 00:04:49,786
with a caveman
spinning a sign around.
98
00:04:50,332 --> 00:04:52,917
It's actually...
It's technically an orangutan.
99
00:04:53,085 --> 00:04:55,920
It seems to me an establishment such
as this could go for overhaul
100
00:04:56,088 --> 00:04:57,858
in the advertising spokesman game.
101
00:04:57,983 --> 00:05:01,967
I'm talking about a real celebrity,
not some sign-spinning fucking monkey.
102
00:05:02,819 --> 00:05:04,887
I'm talking about
goddamn me in the store,
103
00:05:05,142 --> 00:05:07,256
live, uncut, in person.
104
00:05:07,381 --> 00:05:09,181
Bringing in the customers,
105
00:05:09,436 --> 00:05:12,137
- lubing the deals.
- Holy shit!
106
00:05:12,653 --> 00:05:15,465
This must be my goddamn
fucking lucky day.
107
00:05:15,590 --> 00:05:18,192
First off, Kenny Powers
walks into my showroom
108
00:05:18,525 --> 00:05:20,569
and then he says he wants
to do personal appearance.
109
00:05:21,108 --> 00:05:22,658
It's goddamn amazing!
110
00:05:24,546 --> 00:05:26,158
Yeah, I got a lot of star power.
111
00:05:26,481 --> 00:05:29,286
I think it would make this night
a grand success.
112
00:05:29,456 --> 00:05:31,971
And I think it'll only cost you
113
00:05:32,096 --> 00:05:33,096
two grand.
114
00:05:34,220 --> 00:05:36,422
Yeah, I'm gonna pay you 100 bucks.
115
00:05:38,510 --> 00:05:41,557
You sure you don't wanna maybe
meet in the middle somewhere?
116
00:05:41,682 --> 00:05:43,182
How about 200 bucks?
117
00:05:44,958 --> 00:05:47,388
- Two hundred bucks to come...
- Two hundred bucks, cash.
118
00:05:48,046 --> 00:05:50,085
- And a blowjob.
- Fuck you man.
119
00:05:50,210 --> 00:05:51,213
Fuck you.
120
00:05:51,338 --> 00:05:54,269
I'm just kidding.
Bring the fucking ape in here.
121
00:05:54,439 --> 00:05:57,022
123
00:06:20,780 --> 00:06:23,056
Now, part of becoming
a professional athlete
124
00:06:23,181 --> 00:06:24,881
is being strong and fit.
125
00:06:25,540 --> 00:06:28,040
Another part is staying
strong and fit.
126
00:06:28,704 --> 00:06:31,821
That is a part that I myself
am currently involve with.
127
00:06:31,946 --> 00:06:32,946
Example A.
128
00:06:33,647 --> 00:06:35,247
I can stand to lose 4,
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00:06:35,372 --> 00:06:38,847
maybe 5 pounds to get back
in practical game condition.
130
00:06:38,972 --> 00:06:41,690
- No shit.
- What did you just say?
131
00:06:42,887 --> 00:06:45,325
Let's do this.
I got my two favorite students here.
132
00:06:45,450 --> 00:06:48,910
They're gonna spot me
252 pounds of pure steel.
133
00:06:50,013 --> 00:06:52,013
Let's pump some iron, bitches.
134
00:06:53,999 --> 00:06:58,001
Take this serious, because you can get
hurt if you're not strong enough, okay?
135
00:06:58,214 --> 00:06:59,949
Okay. Watch, class.
136
00:07:00,502 --> 00:07:01,952
Masculine strength.
137
00:07:06,509 --> 00:07:10,195
Yeah, help me. Help me out. Okay.
All right, back up, back up. Get away.
138
00:07:10,320 --> 00:07:11,728
Oh, shit!
139
00:07:11,853 --> 00:07:13,096
Oh, fuck me!
140
00:07:13,439 --> 00:07:16,143
Spot me, goddamn it!
Get it off of me!
141
00:07:55,822 --> 00:07:58,424
Yo, what's happening over here
with the babes?
142
00:07:58,549 --> 00:08:00,103
* dance
143
00:08:00,272 --> 00:08:02,439
- A dance?
- Would you like to buy a ticket?
144
00:08:03,003 --> 00:08:05,358
All the profits go toward
Phillip's hospital bills.
145
00:08:05,917 --> 00:08:07,617
Who the fuck is Phillip?
146
00:08:08,730 --> 00:08:11,331
He's one of our students here.
He has brain cancer.
147
00:08:11,456 --> 00:08:14,518
- I've never seen that kid.
- "Spina difa", I think it's called.
148
00:08:14,643 --> 00:08:17,299
Whatever the fuck any of that stuff is,
I don't know him.
149
00:08:17,424 --> 00:08:18,724
He gets a dance?
150
00:08:19,174 --> 00:08:21,833
No, I'm not going
to any depressing shit like that.
151
00:08:22,007 --> 00:08:23,207
Too sensitive.
152
00:08:23,461 --> 00:08:25,380
Kenny, I hate to burst your bubble,
153
00:08:25,505 --> 00:08:28,474
but it looks like your name
is on the chaperon list.
154
00:08:28,599 --> 00:08:31,259
I don't know anything about
a chaperon list. What is that?
155
00:08:32,362 --> 00:08:35,722
It's right here and it says
that you're a teacher supervisor.
156
00:08:36,998 --> 00:08:39,052
Are you asking met to this dance?
157
00:08:39,177 --> 00:08:42,673
I'm not. I'm just saying that your name
is on the chaperon list.
158
00:08:43,493 --> 00:08:45,455
Are you asking me to this dance?
159
00:08:47,910 --> 00:08:49,360
When is this dance?
160
00:08:49,614 --> 00:08:51,418
- It's tonight.
- Tonight?
161
00:08:51,543 --> 00:08:53,948
You mean, tonight, tonight?
Fuck that noise.
162
00:08:54,073 --> 00:08:56,744
I can't do anything tonight
I've got some shit set up already.
163
00:08:56,869 --> 00:08:59,650
- What?
- I'm hosting a celebrity event tonight.
164
00:08:59,838 --> 00:09:02,207
- Really?
- I'm getting paid, like, 15 notes.
165
00:09:02,965 --> 00:09:05,001
Okay, well, if you can't come,
you can't come.
166
00:09:05,400 --> 00:09:08,678
Well, you don't have to get upset,
I'm sorry I can't go the dance with you.
167
00:09:08,803 --> 00:09:11,007
Guess you'll have to chalk
this up to another heartbreak.
168
00:09:11,177 --> 00:09:13,175
Just like back in high school.
169
00:09:15,109 --> 00:09:17,144
How much will you give me
if I slam*** the***
170
00:09:17,269 --> 00:09:19,183
- into the trashcan?
- Nothing.
171
00:09:25,286 --> 00:09:28,358
- D- Ball, what are you doing, man?
- Goddamn it, I'm brushing my teeth.
172
00:09:28,780 --> 00:09:30,561
I need you to give me a ride.
173
00:09:31,717 --> 00:09:34,739
- What's wrong with your truck?
- Nothing. I need you to drive me.
174
00:09:35,118 --> 00:09:36,118
Why?
175
00:09:36,375 --> 00:09:39,008
Well, Schaeffer BMW
is gonna pay me a shit-ton of money
176
00:09:39,133 --> 00:09:41,244
to make a little celebrity
appearance tonight.
177
00:09:42,438 --> 00:09:46,442
And, I don't know. I just felt like
it'll be stupid if I drive myself
178
00:09:46,667 --> 00:09:48,117
because I'm famous.
179
00:09:49,023 --> 00:09:51,921
All right. I'll drive you there
and you can find your way back.
180
00:09:52,046 --> 00:09:53,851
No, I need you to stay.
181
00:09:53,976 --> 00:09:57,220
That's what drivers do. They don't just
drive you there and then drive off.
182
00:09:57,390 --> 00:09:59,867
If you're gonna do this,
you're gonna have to do it the full way.
183
00:09:59,992 --> 00:10:01,839
I might even need you
to wear a uniform.
184
00:10:01,964 --> 00:10:02,964
Forget it.
185
00:10:03,193 --> 00:10:06,061
Look, no one's gonna look down on you
because you drove yourself.
186
00:10:06,186 --> 00:10:08,503
Now, close the door.
Get the fuck out of here.
187
00:10:08,924 --> 00:10:11,641
What's up with them yellow towels?
Those things are pretty...
188
00:10:11,766 --> 00:10:13,616
Give me that, motherfucker.
189
00:10:14,350 --> 00:10:15,650
I saw your dick.
190
00:10:17,731 --> 00:10:19,583
Give me that toilet paper, Kenny.
191
00:10:22,026 --> 00:10:25,883
Come on, you wanna give me a ride?
You wanna be my personal chauffeur?
192
00:10:26,008 --> 00:10:27,962
- I got enough.
- That's not enough.
193
00:10:28,087 --> 00:10:30,408
I smelled that.
You're gonna need more than that.
194
00:10:30,533 --> 00:10:32,964
You have crossed the line.
Give me the toilet paper now!
195
00:10:33,850 --> 00:10:34,850
Fine.
196
00:10:36,068 --> 00:10:38,998
Turtle-walk your ass out of here.
Thanks for nothing.
197
00:10:43,816 --> 00:10:46,309
- Man, this thing's got some power.
- Don't rev my shit, all right?
198
00:10:46,434 --> 00:10:47,824
I'm trying to be serious,
199
00:10:47,949 --> 00:10:50,355
I don't need you to go all
fucking Maverick on me.
200
00:10:50,519 --> 00:10:52,394
All right, it's up here on the left.
201
00:10:53,370 --> 00:10:55,051
- Where?
- Clegg, to the left.
202
00:10:55,176 --> 00:10:57,655
- Where, there? There?
- The fucking place, Schaeffer BMW.
203
00:10:58,025 --> 00:10:59,853
All right, I got it, I got it.
204
00:11:01,683 --> 00:11:03,620
Fuck you, asshole!
205
00:11:04,781 --> 00:11:06,914
All right, here we are.
206
00:11:07,627 --> 00:11:09,759
Man, this feels good, Clegg.
207
00:11:11,459 --> 00:11:13,639
Did you take one
of those black beauties?
208
00:11:13,764 --> 00:11:14,864
The ecstasy?
209
00:11:15,467 --> 00:11:17,506
No, dude.
This is a real job.
210
00:11:17,631 --> 00:11:19,969
It's not like teaching kids.
You can't get fucked up.
211
00:11:20,590 --> 00:11:23,074
What feels good is just this.
212
00:11:24,388 --> 00:11:26,238
Back in the spotlight, man.
213
00:11:26,778 --> 00:11:28,351
Right where I belong.
214
00:11:28,476 --> 00:11:30,978
All right!
Kenny Powers is here, everyone!
215
00:11:33,795 --> 00:11:35,818
Keep going. Keep going.
216
00:11:36,251 --> 00:11:38,764
Kenny Powers.
That's Kenny Powers.
217
00:11:39,281 --> 00:11:40,823
He doesn't do this all the time.
218
00:11:42,823 --> 00:11:45,509
- Turn around! Look at them, man.
- How's it going?
219
00:11:45,634 --> 00:11:47,330
Why'd you bring a football?
220
00:11:48,287 --> 00:11:50,673
Shelby's bad boy
is back in business, huh?
221
00:11:50,798 --> 00:11:52,668
Oh, yes, he is.
Yes, he is.
222
00:11:53,023 --> 00:11:55,213
Are you nervous or not?
You feel a lot of emotions?
223
00:11:55,574 --> 00:11:59,578
I feel 110 percent.
Ready to move some BMWs tonight!
224
00:12:01,975 --> 00:12:03,253
That's... That's it.
225
00:12:03,378 --> 00:12:05,387
It's a big night.
What are you gonna go with,
226
00:12:05,512 --> 00:12:08,712
your fastball or your cut fastball?
Maybe a forkball?
227
00:12:09,110 --> 00:12:11,650
Maybe just signing
some balls instead.
228
00:12:11,775 --> 00:12:13,775
- Signing some balls?
- Yeah.
229
00:12:14,322 --> 00:12:15,922
It's not a microphone.
230
00:12:16,150 --> 00:12:19,654
- It's not a microphone.
- I know. We're just having fun.
231
00:12:20,028 --> 00:12:21,397
How's it going?
232
00:12:21,522 --> 00:12:24,545
- You ready to get this thing going?
- Let's do it.
233
00:12:25,061 --> 00:12:27,068
- Why don't you throw that on?
- What's this?
234
00:12:27,193 --> 00:12:29,363
That's an Ashley Schaeffer BMW polo.
235
00:12:29,488 --> 00:12:30,914
- Put that on.
- Right now?
236
00:12:31,039 --> 00:12:31,916
Right now.
237
00:12:32,307 --> 00:12:34,954
No offense, but I think
the all-black is more indicative
238
00:12:35,079 --> 00:12:37,072
of the Kenny Powers rebel persona.
239
00:12:37,197 --> 00:12:39,097
Scott, heads up.
Thank you.
240
00:12:39,431 --> 00:12:40,890
Look, I paid you $200, okay?
241
00:12:41,015 --> 00:12:44,365
I wanna see Ashley Schaeffer BMW
on your tit. All right?
242
00:12:45,391 --> 00:12:48,307
Easy. I don't play games like that.
243
00:12:49,241 --> 00:12:50,641
This isn't a game.
244
00:12:54,985 --> 00:12:57,923
All right, everybody, who
wants to meet Kenny Powers?
245
00:12:59,466 --> 00:13:02,311
- What the fuck is up with you, man?
- Ah, you know me.
246
00:13:02,436 --> 00:13:04,699
- Who am I making this out to?
- Well, Kenny,
247
00:13:04,869 --> 00:13:06,950
my name's Kevin Hickman
and I want you to know
248
00:13:07,075 --> 00:13:10,005
even though your career's hit
a real sour patch lately,
249
00:13:10,130 --> 00:13:13,516
I'm still your number-one
goshdarn fan, man, 100 percent.
250
00:13:13,641 --> 00:13:16,377
That's great, there you go, sport.
Take a hike.
251
00:13:17,122 --> 00:13:19,130
Actually the thing is, Kenny,
252
00:13:20,284 --> 00:13:23,066
I was wondering if maybe you might
burn one down middle for me.
253
00:13:23,191 --> 00:13:25,574
I brought my glove
and it'd mean a lot.
254
00:13:25,699 --> 00:13:28,338
Well, obviously I'd love to,
you know, do that,
255
00:13:28,463 --> 00:13:31,058
but I don't think it would be fair
to all the other people...
256
00:13:32,076 --> 00:13:34,350
I think you're underestimating
your fan base.
257
00:13:34,655 --> 00:13:37,273
Who in their right mind
wouldn't wanna see
258
00:13:37,672 --> 00:13:39,160
the Kenny Powers
259
00:13:39,417 --> 00:13:41,694
give us a little display
of that God-given talent!
260
00:13:41,863 --> 00:13:43,863
- All right!
- Who wouldn't wanna see that?
261
00:13:44,584 --> 00:13:47,830
Well, the thing is,
I didn't even warm the old whip up.
262
00:13:48,159 --> 00:13:50,560
I got all this Polynesian sauce
all over my fingers
263
00:13:50,685 --> 00:13:53,559
for eating these goddamn egg rolls.
I would just hate if I slipped up
264
00:13:53,684 --> 00:13:55,708
and put a hole
on one of these vehicles.
265
00:13:55,878 --> 00:13:57,576
Nonsense!
Come on, man!
266
00:13:58,351 --> 00:14:02,005
I'm Ashley Schaeffer,
I got a whole lot full of goddamn BMWs.
267
00:14:02,216 --> 00:14:05,787
Who the hell wouldn't wanna see you
burn a hole through one, right?
268
00:14:05,912 --> 00:14:07,732
The people wanna see it!
269
00:14:11,275 --> 00:14:12,641
Yeah, come on!
270
00:14:15,197 --> 00:14:16,770
- Here we go.
- Take it easy.
271
00:14:17,001 --> 00:14:18,970
Hell with that.
Smoke that fool.
272
00:14:20,236 --> 00:14:22,234
Kenny Powers.
Come on, everyone.
273
00:14:32,372 --> 00:14:36,005
Sorry, sorry. I can't do it.
Not gonna do it. I can't do it.
274
00:14:37,043 --> 00:14:39,876
I'll be goddamned
if I fork out 200 bucks
275
00:14:40,001 --> 00:14:43,631
and I'm flat-out denied a single
goddamn pitch. Throw the damn ball.
276
00:14:44,220 --> 00:14:47,913
Pitch was never part of the deal.
I mean, I'm sorry to be a stickler,
277
00:14:48,038 --> 00:14:51,698
but, I throw one to him, next thing I'm
at the grocery store, I'm at the bar,
278
00:14:51,823 --> 00:14:54,290
I'm at the titty club and ever
dumb motherfucker I pass
279
00:14:54,415 --> 00:14:57,894
is asking me to smoke one for him.
And I can't open myself up to that.
280
00:14:58,019 --> 00:15:01,676
If I didn't know better, I'd think Kenny
is afraid to throw a baseball.
281
00:15:03,471 --> 00:15:05,366
Come on, it's been that long? Huh?
282
00:15:05,491 --> 00:15:07,604
No.
Forget your trade?
283
00:15:07,729 --> 00:15:10,032
Come on, it's a simple motion,
it's like that.
284
00:15:10,203 --> 00:15:12,642
You got a little tendinitis
or something? Come on.
285
00:15:12,767 --> 00:15:14,703
How about: Why don't you
roll one on the ground,
286
00:15:14,874 --> 00:15:17,831
- pretend like it's a bowling ball?
- How about we just go back
287
00:15:18,002 --> 00:15:20,116
and we'll sign the rest
of the balls and...
288
00:15:20,241 --> 00:15:23,985
How about you throw the ball?
Come on, these people wanna see a show
289
00:15:24,195 --> 00:15:25,836
and I don't wanna be embarrassed.
290
00:15:25,961 --> 00:15:28,862
Well, you're doing a good job
of that on your own
291
00:15:28,987 --> 00:15:32,219
- just by how you fucking look.
- I thought you were a baseball pitcher.
292
00:15:33,286 --> 00:15:35,251
- You know...
- I thought you were a ball player.
293
00:15:35,376 --> 00:15:36,961
- I am a ball player.
- Are you?
294
00:15:37,086 --> 00:15:39,038
- I'm not a goddamn ape.
- Really?
295
00:15:39,577 --> 00:15:42,755
- So far I don't believe it.
- You know what? Fuck you.
296
00:15:42,880 --> 00:15:46,439
Fuck this, fuck all you people.
Good luck selling these stupid cars.
297
00:15:46,564 --> 00:15:47,953
I'm not helping you.
298
00:15:48,078 --> 00:15:51,469
You know you're not gonna get paid
if you walk out of here.
299
00:15:56,486 --> 00:15:57,486
Good Lord.
300
00:16:30,278 --> 00:16:31,788
What are you doing?
301
00:16:32,010 --> 00:16:33,229
What's up?
302
00:16:33,834 --> 00:16:35,897
Dude, it's time to roll!
Come on!
303
00:16:36,022 --> 00:16:38,172
See? Look, I told you I know him.
304
00:16:40,076 --> 00:16:41,154
Come on!
305
00:16:42,423 --> 00:16:44,073
I gotta go, I gotta go.
306
00:16:46,963 --> 00:16:48,959
Where were you? I told you
to wait in the car.
307
00:16:49,084 --> 00:16:51,834
Why is there silver shit
all over your face?
308
00:16:52,035 --> 00:16:54,379
I was hanging out
with those dudes in the parking lot.
309
00:16:54,504 --> 00:16:57,614
Doing what?
Giving RoboCop a blowjob?
310
00:16:57,985 --> 00:16:59,685
- Are you crying?
- No!
311
00:17:01,053 --> 00:17:02,811
Do you still have that ecstasy?
312
00:17:21,825 --> 00:17:23,925
He's with me.
Don't bust balls.
313
00:17:26,501 --> 00:17:28,628
My... My friends are here.
They're...
314
00:17:46,116 --> 00:17:47,416
Fucking awesome!
315
00:17:58,867 --> 00:18:01,249
I'm not gonna get out
on that dance floor.
316
00:18:01,374 --> 00:18:03,400
It would be inappropriate.
What is this?
317
00:18:03,525 --> 00:18:05,793
- You're gonna dance with her?
- That's different.
318
00:18:05,918 --> 00:18:07,033
That's how it is?
319
00:18:07,158 --> 00:18:08,793
Okay, come on, come on.
320
00:18:20,421 --> 00:18:23,255
Hey, everybody really turned
it out for Phillip tonight,
321
00:18:23,380 --> 00:18:26,269
don't you think?
It's a pretty good party.
322
00:18:27,886 --> 00:18:29,436
Pretty...
All right.
323
00:18:38,873 --> 00:18:41,191
- Hi, how are you?
- What are you doing here?
324
00:18:41,316 --> 00:18:43,787
- I thought you had a big event.
- Yeah, I did.
325
00:18:44,874 --> 00:18:47,101
I cancelled it.
I'm not an ape.
326
00:18:47,670 --> 00:18:49,542
I'm a professional ball player.
327
00:18:50,202 --> 00:18:53,102
I need to be around people
who understand that.
328
00:18:55,508 --> 00:18:58,344
Are you okay?
Because you're sweating a lot.
329
00:18:59,634 --> 00:19:01,384
I gotta come clean, babe.
330
00:19:02,048 --> 00:19:03,948
There's one image in my life
331
00:19:04,073 --> 00:19:06,184
that consistently makes me happy
332
00:19:06,538 --> 00:19:08,663
no matter when I think about it,
and that image...
333
00:19:08,788 --> 00:19:10,772
That one image is your big tits.
334
00:19:11,842 --> 00:19:12,892
No, listen.
335
00:19:13,112 --> 00:19:15,475
I'm not trying to be crude
with you, okay? This is real.
336
00:19:15,600 --> 00:19:17,421
This is me being honest with you.
337
00:19:17,546 --> 00:19:20,281
- You're inappropriate.
- Love is inappropriate sometimes.
338
00:19:20,453 --> 00:19:23,447
- There are children present.
- What a better place to say my love
339
00:19:23,572 --> 00:19:25,536
than surrounded by little angels?
340
00:19:25,661 --> 00:19:27,080
This is about real emotions.
341
00:19:27,681 --> 00:19:31,150
This is about me
loving you for real.
342
00:19:31,981 --> 00:19:34,546
And not in a just-to-make-me-cum
kind of way.
343
00:19:34,717 --> 00:19:36,673
In a real way.
All right.
344
00:19:38,044 --> 00:19:40,144
If you won't listen to my words,
345
00:19:40,599 --> 00:19:42,919
then listen to my dancing feet.
346
00:19:52,419 --> 00:19:53,419
Oh, my.
347
00:19:53,906 --> 00:19:54,899
Work drugs.
348
00:21:03,159 --> 00:21:04,010
A janitor.
349
00:21:13,062 --> 00:21:14,712
Do you think he's okay?
350
00:21:15,878 --> 00:21:18,278
Yeah,
I think he just got overheated.
351
00:21:20,127 --> 00:21:22,777
- You doing okay there, Kenny?
- I'm fine.
352
00:21:23,127 --> 00:21:25,577
It was the egg rolls,
not the ecstasy.
353
00:21:26,034 --> 00:21:28,987
Okay. Well, we're gonna
get you a ride home, all right?
354
00:21:40,021 --> 00:21:42,889
Well, we raised a lot of money
for Phillip tonight, huh?
355
00:21:43,014 --> 00:21:44,564
That was pretty good.
356
00:21:45,374 --> 00:21:46,924
That's right, Stevie.
357
00:21:54,037 --> 00:21:55,512
Everybody's gone, Kenny.
358
00:21:55,637 --> 00:21:58,340
- He was supposed to wait for me.
- Who's that?
359
00:22:00,275 --> 00:22:01,275
My driver.
360
00:22:03,178 --> 00:22:06,056
- You have a driver?
- Of course I do. I'm famous.
361
00:22:07,742 --> 00:22:10,226
Why don't you come with me?
I'll give you a ride.
362
00:22:11,519 --> 00:22:12,769
I'm going home.
363
00:22:21,340 --> 00:22:22,890
We'll see you Monday.
364
00:22:43,357 --> 00:22:45,444
You look like
you could use a friend.
365
00:22:45,820 --> 00:22:47,154
What'd you just say?
366
00:22:47,326 --> 00:22:49,240
You look like you could use a ride.
367
00:22:49,591 --> 00:22:51,091
Well, maybe I could.
368
00:22:51,473 --> 00:22:54,724
- Is that such a crime?
- No, it's not a crime.
369
00:22:55,402 --> 00:22:59,406
I'd give you a ride gladly,
Kenny Powers.
370
00:23:00,746 --> 00:23:01,846
Funny thing.
371
00:23:02,575 --> 00:23:04,319
When you're on top of the world,
372
00:23:04,444 --> 00:23:07,594
every motherfucker wants
to get a piece of your ass.
373
00:23:08,303 --> 00:23:11,697
But then you take a little time
off from being unstoppable
374
00:23:11,822 --> 00:23:15,119
just to regroup and relax,
375
00:23:16,324 --> 00:23:19,274
no one will to give you
the time of fucking day.
376
00:23:20,121 --> 00:23:23,309
This face used to cash
fucking checks.
377
00:23:24,061 --> 00:23:25,109
And this dick...
378
00:23:30,885 --> 00:23:33,735
I guess Kenny Powers
ain't what he used to be.
379
00:23:36,155 --> 00:23:39,081
No, you... I can imagine.
I saw you lots on TV.
380
00:23:39,788 --> 00:23:42,038
Your face did cash a lot of checks.
381
00:23:42,671 --> 00:23:44,971
I don't know about the dick, though.
382
00:23:47,765 --> 00:23:49,383
What the fuck is your name again?
383
00:23:51,793 --> 00:23:54,430
Stevie.
It's Stevie Janowski.
384
00:23:59,200 --> 00:24:00,935
All right, Stevie Janowski.
385
00:24:01,450 --> 00:24:02,938
I accept your offer.
386
00:24:12,679 --> 00:24:15,409
Can we go to Ashley Schaeffer
BMW first?
387
00:24:17,407 --> 00:24:19,507
Anything you want, Kenny Powers.
388
00:24:20,067 --> 00:24:21,367
Anything at all.
30980
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