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Welcome to Spidey's cardio workout.
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What the...
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Uh, excuse me.
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Good morning. This is your 9 a.m. wake-up call.
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Curtain of 1-555-HALP A NICE DAY.
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Already?
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Guess we'll have to finish our workout some other time.
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Okay, class, pair up with your partners
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and go do your experiments.
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50% of your term rests on this experiment.
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In other words, do not screw up.
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Well, what'd I miss?
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Just like the entire assignment.
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Experiment of your choice illustrating the relationship
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between thought and behavior.
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We're supposed to partner up.
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Oh. Then, uh, want to be partners?
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Oh, sorry. I'm taking.
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Coolest partner in the class, if I must say.
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Good morning, Mr. Dylan.
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It's pretty cool, huh?
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You know what that is? Your new lab partner.
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You're about to enter the Christina Zone.
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Ooh!
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I'm really easy to get along with.
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The truth is, I have an almost preternatural ability
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to communicate with others.
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Preternatural?
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Mm-hmm. Practically supernatural.
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You know, psychokinesis, ESP, Jedi mind stuff.
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You believe in all that, don't you?
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Actually, no.
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Okay, how about cryptozoology?
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You have to believe in that, 'cause hello, human spider.
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Out there saving people, pretty awesome.
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Yeah, Spiderman's cool.
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Cool, mysterious, big-hearted.
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And those spider eyes.
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Ugh. I get butterflies just looking.
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Mm. Yup. Me and the Spidey-Dude are soulmates.
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Soulmates? Um...
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So, shouldn't we talk about our experiment?
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Like I told you, this is where my new invention is.
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I know, solitary trade inventing.
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You wouldn't associate it with someone so verbal like me.
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It's a gift, really.
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Listen, I'm not sure that's gonna--
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Not this!
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Bottom is creating a super glue gun.
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Acid polymers.
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Pretty much melted half my high school science class.
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It's a da!
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Here it is. My ESP crown.
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I don't--
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And now, I am going to read your mind.
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Okay.
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First, let's set the mood.
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Peter Parker, yes.
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Let's see, let's see, let's see. Uh-huh.
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You like to study. You live off-campus.
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Right, well, you have serious major mega-girl problems.
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With a redhead.
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Yes?
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See, I told you, let's crank it up!
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Christina!
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Christina, where are you?
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Where are you?
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Whoa, you all right?
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I need to be alone now.
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What? Are you? I mean--
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Sorry, Peter. We'll have to experiment some other time.
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Where are you?
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Christina, where are you?
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I'm here. Where are you?
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Who are you? On your desk.
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Getting warmer.
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I've been calling and calling.
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If you don't listen, how are we ever going to be together?
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Now, are you ready to do everything I say?
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So, how was psych?
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MJ, it was a nightmare.
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I got the lab partner from Sunnydale.
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Want to grab lunch? I got a serious pastrami jones working.
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Okay, I know that look.
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Extra lean, on sourdough, hold the mustard.
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And here I thought you weren't paying attention.
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No, I pay plenty of attention.
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You do? You know what our problem is?
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We don't ever share our thoughts, our feelings.
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That's your hunger talking.
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Peter, I don't think you get it.
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We've been friends for, like, ever, right?
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And we know a lot of details about each other.
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But see, if we're going to make this shift, you know,
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it has to be more than knowing my favorite sandwich.
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It should be like... like...
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Like ESP?
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Like communicating.
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Oh, okay. I can do that.
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Can you? You're always running off somewhere.
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But I realized I have no idea what you do or where you go.
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I mean, who are you, really?
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Right now? A guy who wants to take you to lunch.
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This is what we're going to do.
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Every day, starting tomorrow, we write a note to each other,
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divulging a personal tidbit.
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A tidbit?
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Uh-huh. Something small, but deep.
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A secret.
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I'm determined, Peter.
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I will get to know the real you.
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I'll do anything for us to be together, Spider-Man. Anything.
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Well, you're going to have to find me, aren't you?
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The real me.
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But how? I mean, it's not like you're in the phone book.
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Think, Christina. Think.
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How do you lure the amazing Spider-Man to you?
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What do heroes do?
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They... they save people?
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She shoots, she scores.
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Go catch yourself a spider.
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So, there you go. I need a tidbit.
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A tidbit?
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I know. That was my reaction.
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So, then she explained. She wants something deeply personal and soul-bearing.
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Help me, Harry Wan Kenobi. You're my only hope.
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Well, I got only one piece of advice.
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Get out. Get out while you still can.
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Come on. I'm serious.
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It's a tough one, buddy. We're guys.
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We don't do soul-surging.
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I have to think of something to write.
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Okay, dude. You like MJ. You want her to be your girlfriend?
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Well, there's only one thing she wants you to write on that piece of paper.
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How do you really feel about her?
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I feel... good about her. Really good.
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Yeah. That's pure poetry. Suck it up, man.
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Put pen to paper and take the plunge.
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Okay, Spider-Man. Time to play hero.
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Good thing I was in the neighborhood.
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I knew it. I knew you'd come. Oh, Spidey. This just froze it.
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What? What does this prove?
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I knew. If I jumped, you'd save me.
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And once you were here, you'd realize that we're...
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We're what? What do you think? We're like soulmates?
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Oh, my God. You knew exactly what I was thinking.
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This just proves it. We are soulmates. We are!
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No, we are not. I don't even know you.
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Now don't put yourself or others in danger. Ever again.
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I was trying to be a good girlfriend.
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I was only doing what you said. I thought it would make you happy.
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Well, next time, be more careful.
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I don't have time to go around saving careless girls.
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Oh, Spidey. I'm so sorry. I blew it.
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Please, tell me. How else can I find you?
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Figure it out.
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MJ, a personal tidbit about me that nobody knows is...
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When I was little, I used to get a rash every time I took a bath.
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Must go deeper.
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MJ, what you don't know is...
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I'm not nearly as smart as everyone thinks.
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I had to take my driver's license test twice.
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MJ, deep down inside me...
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I'm afraid there's a big, boring nothing.
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I don't know what else I can tell you.
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Except for the coolest, secret stuff about me which I can never share with you.
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Like this.
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And thanks to Empire State U's own Peter Parker for that exclusive Spider-Man footage.
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Peter Parker. He always seems to know where to find Spider-Man.
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Okay, I'll have an ice vanilla latte with non-dairy whipped cream.
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That moo-wang. 20,000 students at Empire U and he remembers that I'm lactose intolerant.
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Peter Parker? Where?
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Wait, when did you see Peter last?
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Parker, Parker. I don't know.
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But his roomie, Harry Osborne, just bought two half-calf granny macchiatos and went that way.
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Peter, I'm so glad you're here. This is so exciting. Here.
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Here's mine. Where's yours?
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Well, I...
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Now, come on. I won't accept any excuse. Cough it up.
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It might not be what you're hoping.
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Relax. It'll be great. Mine first, okay?
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When I was little and my parents were fighting, I would hide in my closet and pretend I was a stowaway on a ship.
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It was grimy and cold there, but I was happy because I wasn't stuck in the house. Nobody fought.
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Wow.
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Say no more. I'll read yours.
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No, don't. Don't.
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I couldn't believe what he wrote. Go ahead, read it.
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To MG, I confess that no one else in the world knows I'm allergic to grouper, the fish.
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I was deeply, nakedly honest with him, and he offered up grouper.
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Well, what'd you say?
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Thank you, Peter Parker, for wading toe deep into our relationship.
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You obviously have no conception of what really matters in life, and so will die a sad, pathetic, lonely old man.
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Ouch. You said that?
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Maybe not with words.
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But my body language made it pretty clear.
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So now what?
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I don't know. It's all so very messed up.
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Well, long as you don't flip-flop back to Spider-Man.
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Spider-Man? Don't worry. I know how much you hate him.
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Besides, I am so over that.
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Yeah. Well, I bet he's not over you. In fact, I bet that sleaze bucket still has the hots for you.
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Harry, stop it.
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See? No, I have to help Peter. It'll be you and Spider-Man all over again.
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MJ, you're in love with Mary Jane Watson?
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Mmm. Possibly.
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But you can't be. You can't be.
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The heart feels what it feels.
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The heart can change with enough determination. I know it can.
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So, you do whatever it takes?
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Anything.
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Well, if that's the case, all you really need to do to win Spider-Man's heart...
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Yeah?
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...is remove the obstacle between you.
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Remove? You mean MJ, as in...
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That's right. Eliminate.
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Okay, okay. Here's the money shot.
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Look, Spider-Man focuses, and boom! Catches the car with webbing from only one hand.
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Come on. That didn't look so hard.
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If I could shoot Sticky-Goop from my wrist, I wouldn't have to focus on it.
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He's a guy. I bet he's thinking about girls.
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He is not.
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I mean, he seems a little too busy for that.
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Eh, maybe you're right.
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Ooh, come to think of it. What's up with that mask? He probably looks like Goat Boy under that thing.
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Yeah.
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Anyone else seen this?
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Um, no. You're the first.
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Exactly. You keep supplying me with footage, people will take notice, and then you'll become famous.
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You think?
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I know. And I will make reporter and get my own morning talk show.
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Actually, I never really considered being famous. I just like taking pictures.
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Humility. My charming quality.
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Aww, nice.
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Who is it?
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What do you want?
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Spider-Man, here, to profess his true and undying affection for me.
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Candy and I will be together forever.
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You're insane.
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Insanely jealous.
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Look, there's nothing going on between me and Spider-Man. You lie!
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I don't like liars.
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Oh, no.
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We're early for our wedding.
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Don't the lovebirds be surprised to see an uninvited guest splayed on the buffet with acid holes where her vital arcades should be?
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What can you possibly hope to accomplish?
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I will prove that Spider-Man loves me, even if it's buried deep in his subconscious.
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You see, everyone, even Spider-Man, needs help to eat through facades and expose true feelings.
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But what if, what if it's not you?
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Then you'd better hope it's not you.
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I'm melting! I'm melting!
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Hey, know what I'm feeling right now?
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Yeah.
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Your invention sucks.
263
00:15:15,540 --> 00:15:20,540
Christina, I think this crown did something to your mind to make you act like this.
264
00:15:20,540 --> 00:15:27,540
No. I've always known you were my soulmate, Spider-Man. I just needed you to realize it, too.
265
00:15:30,540 --> 00:15:31,540
Put the wires on.
266
00:15:31,540 --> 00:15:32,540
It doesn't work.
267
00:15:32,540 --> 00:15:35,540
Put the wires on! Do it now!
268
00:15:35,540 --> 00:15:40,540
Okay, then. Read my mind. Tell me what I really feel.
269
00:15:40,540 --> 00:15:43,540
Wait! How do you know you're not just projecting your own feelings onto him?
270
00:15:43,540 --> 00:15:48,540
How many times has this crown thing been absolutely correct? She has a point.
271
00:15:48,540 --> 00:15:51,540
So I'll have to ask a question I know I can prove right or wrong.
272
00:15:55,540 --> 00:15:57,540
Who are you under that mask?
273
00:16:03,540 --> 00:16:06,540
Oh, my God. I know who Spider-Man is.
274
00:16:07,540 --> 00:16:11,540
I had no idea you were so average and unexciting.
275
00:16:12,540 --> 00:16:14,540
I mean, no offense.
276
00:16:34,540 --> 00:16:36,540
I'm not a fan of Spider-Man.
277
00:16:36,540 --> 00:16:38,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
278
00:16:38,540 --> 00:16:40,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
279
00:16:40,540 --> 00:16:42,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
280
00:16:42,540 --> 00:16:44,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
281
00:16:44,540 --> 00:16:46,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
282
00:16:46,540 --> 00:16:48,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
283
00:16:48,540 --> 00:16:50,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
284
00:16:50,540 --> 00:16:52,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
285
00:16:52,540 --> 00:16:54,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
286
00:16:54,540 --> 00:16:56,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
287
00:16:56,540 --> 00:16:58,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
288
00:16:58,540 --> 00:17:00,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
289
00:17:00,540 --> 00:17:02,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
290
00:17:02,540 --> 00:17:04,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
291
00:17:04,540 --> 00:17:06,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
292
00:17:06,540 --> 00:17:08,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
293
00:17:08,540 --> 00:17:10,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
294
00:17:10,540 --> 00:17:12,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
295
00:17:12,540 --> 00:17:14,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
296
00:17:14,540 --> 00:17:16,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
297
00:17:16,540 --> 00:17:18,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
298
00:17:18,540 --> 00:17:20,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
299
00:17:20,540 --> 00:17:22,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
300
00:17:22,540 --> 00:17:24,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
301
00:17:24,540 --> 00:17:26,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
302
00:17:26,540 --> 00:17:28,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
303
00:17:28,540 --> 00:17:30,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
304
00:17:30,540 --> 00:17:32,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
305
00:17:32,540 --> 00:17:34,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
306
00:17:34,540 --> 00:17:36,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
307
00:17:36,540 --> 00:17:38,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
308
00:17:38,540 --> 00:17:40,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
309
00:17:40,540 --> 00:17:42,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
310
00:17:42,540 --> 00:17:44,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
311
00:17:44,540 --> 00:17:46,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
312
00:17:46,540 --> 00:17:48,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
313
00:17:48,540 --> 00:17:50,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
314
00:17:50,540 --> 00:17:52,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
315
00:17:52,540 --> 00:17:54,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
316
00:17:54,540 --> 00:17:56,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
317
00:17:56,540 --> 00:18:00,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
318
00:18:00,540 --> 00:18:02,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
319
00:18:02,540 --> 00:18:04,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
320
00:18:04,540 --> 00:18:06,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
321
00:18:06,540 --> 00:18:08,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
322
00:18:08,540 --> 00:18:10,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
323
00:18:10,540 --> 00:18:12,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
324
00:18:12,540 --> 00:18:14,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
325
00:18:14,540 --> 00:18:16,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
326
00:18:16,540 --> 00:18:18,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
327
00:18:18,540 --> 00:18:20,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
328
00:18:20,540 --> 00:18:22,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
329
00:18:22,540 --> 00:18:24,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
330
00:18:24,540 --> 00:18:26,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
331
00:18:26,540 --> 00:18:28,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
332
00:18:28,540 --> 00:18:30,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
333
00:18:30,540 --> 00:18:32,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
334
00:18:32,540 --> 00:18:34,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
335
00:18:34,540 --> 00:18:36,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
336
00:18:36,540 --> 00:18:38,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
337
00:18:38,540 --> 00:18:40,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
338
00:18:40,540 --> 00:18:42,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
339
00:18:42,540 --> 00:18:44,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
340
00:18:44,540 --> 00:18:46,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
341
00:18:46,540 --> 00:18:48,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
342
00:18:48,540 --> 00:18:50,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
343
00:18:50,540 --> 00:18:54,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
344
00:18:54,540 --> 00:18:56,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
345
00:18:56,540 --> 00:18:58,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
346
00:18:58,540 --> 00:19:00,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
347
00:19:00,540 --> 00:19:02,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
348
00:19:02,540 --> 00:19:04,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
349
00:19:04,540 --> 00:19:06,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
350
00:19:06,540 --> 00:19:08,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
351
00:19:08,540 --> 00:19:10,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
352
00:19:10,540 --> 00:19:12,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
353
00:19:12,540 --> 00:19:14,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
354
00:19:14,540 --> 00:19:16,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
355
00:19:16,540 --> 00:19:18,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
356
00:19:18,540 --> 00:19:20,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
357
00:19:20,540 --> 00:19:22,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
358
00:19:22,540 --> 00:19:24,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
359
00:19:24,540 --> 00:19:26,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
360
00:19:26,540 --> 00:19:28,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
361
00:19:28,540 --> 00:19:30,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
362
00:19:30,540 --> 00:19:32,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
363
00:19:32,540 --> 00:19:34,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
364
00:19:34,540 --> 00:19:36,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
365
00:19:36,540 --> 00:19:38,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
366
00:19:38,540 --> 00:19:40,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
367
00:19:40,540 --> 00:19:42,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
368
00:19:42,540 --> 00:19:44,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
369
00:19:44,540 --> 00:19:46,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
370
00:19:46,540 --> 00:19:48,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
371
00:19:48,540 --> 00:19:50,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
372
00:19:50,540 --> 00:19:52,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
373
00:19:52,540 --> 00:19:54,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
374
00:19:54,540 --> 00:19:56,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
375
00:19:56,540 --> 00:19:58,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
376
00:19:58,540 --> 00:20:00,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
377
00:20:00,540 --> 00:20:02,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
378
00:20:02,540 --> 00:20:04,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
379
00:20:04,540 --> 00:20:06,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
380
00:20:06,540 --> 00:20:08,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
381
00:20:08,540 --> 00:20:10,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
382
00:20:10,540 --> 00:20:12,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
383
00:20:12,540 --> 00:20:16,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
384
00:20:16,540 --> 00:20:18,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
385
00:20:18,540 --> 00:20:20,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
386
00:20:20,540 --> 00:20:22,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
387
00:20:22,540 --> 00:20:24,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
388
00:20:24,540 --> 00:20:26,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
389
00:20:26,540 --> 00:20:28,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
390
00:20:28,540 --> 00:20:30,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.
28050
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