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1
00:00:00,913 --> 00:00:03,829
[instrumental music]
2
00:00:06,354 --> 00:00:08,660
Admit it, boys,
the old man was awesome today.
3
00:00:08,747 --> 00:00:09,835
Yeah, totally.
4
00:00:09,922 --> 00:00:11,098
I was blockin' shots
5
00:00:11,185 --> 00:00:12,142
hittin' the boards and playin'
6
00:00:12,229 --> 00:00:13,709
some hard-nose defense.
7
00:00:13,796 --> 00:00:15,841
Yeah, it sure was nice
of that brownie troop
8
00:00:15,928 --> 00:00:17,756
to let you play
in their game, huh?
9
00:00:19,715 --> 00:00:21,847
- Oh, Frank.
- Hi, hon.
10
00:00:21,934 --> 00:00:24,154
Oh, thank goodness
I got here before you ate.
11
00:00:24,241 --> 00:00:25,938
I just got the results
of our cholesterol tests
12
00:00:26,026 --> 00:00:27,375
from Dr. Tyler.
13
00:00:27,462 --> 00:00:30,334
Mine's 160, but yours is 273.
14
00:00:30,421 --> 00:00:32,641
Well, don't worry, honey,
a little more junk food
15
00:00:32,728 --> 00:00:34,773
and layin' around the house,
you'll catch right up.
16
00:00:34,860 --> 00:00:36,819
[laughing]
17
00:00:36,906 --> 00:00:38,473
Okay, guys. Here you go.
18
00:00:38,560 --> 00:00:40,736
Bacon chili cheeseburgers
all around.
19
00:00:40,823 --> 00:00:42,564
- Mm-hmm.
- Yeah, burgers.
20
00:00:42,651 --> 00:00:43,869
Hey!
21
00:00:43,956 --> 00:00:45,958
Frank, you can't eat
this cheeseburger.
22
00:00:46,046 --> 00:00:49,266
It's dripping
with saturated fat.
23
00:00:49,353 --> 00:00:51,486
Come on, Frank, you know,
if you're not gonna deal
24
00:00:51,573 --> 00:00:52,574
with your cholesterol problem
25
00:00:52,661 --> 00:00:54,184
then I will. Come with me.
26
00:00:54,271 --> 00:00:56,230
I wanna take you to Edna Smith's
health food cafe.
27
00:00:56,317 --> 00:00:58,841
Edna Smith, honey,
she's a scrawny, pale woman
28
00:00:58,928 --> 00:01:01,278
with a hackin' cough.
29
00:01:01,365 --> 00:01:02,584
If I eat what she eats
30
00:01:02,671 --> 00:01:04,107
I'm gonna be dead
within the week.
31
00:01:04,194 --> 00:01:05,717
Frank, the doctor says
you have to do something
32
00:01:05,804 --> 00:01:07,676
about your cholesterol problem.
33
00:01:07,763 --> 00:01:11,767
[sighs]
Alright,
I'll go to the sprout joint.
34
00:01:11,854 --> 00:01:14,639
But, if she starts combing
her legs, I'm outta there.
35
00:01:14,726 --> 00:01:15,814
[scoffs]
36
00:01:18,513 --> 00:01:20,080
Man, poor dad,
having to eat lunch
37
00:01:20,167 --> 00:01:21,864
in a vegetarian restaurant.
38
00:01:21,951 --> 00:01:24,345
Yeah, you know,
I used to be a vegetarian.
39
00:01:24,432 --> 00:01:27,696
It was pretty cool, until I
found out you couldn't eat meat.
40
00:01:27,783 --> 00:01:29,089
And I shined it right on.
41
00:01:29,176 --> 00:01:30,351
[both laugh]
42
00:01:31,874 --> 00:01:34,790
[theme song]
43
00:01:45,583 --> 00:01:48,456
[screaming]
44
00:01:51,023 --> 00:01:52,590
♪ The dream got broken ♪
45
00:01:52,677 --> 00:01:54,375
♪ Seemed like all was lost ♪
46
00:01:54,462 --> 00:01:56,333
♪ What would be the future? ♪
47
00:01:56,420 --> 00:01:57,987
♪ Could you pay the cost? ♪
48
00:01:58,074 --> 00:01:59,162
♪ You wonder ♪
49
00:01:59,249 --> 00:02:00,859
♪ Will there ever be ♪
50
00:02:00,946 --> 00:02:03,035
♪ A second time around ♪
51
00:02:04,733 --> 00:02:05,864
♪ Woah-a woah-a ♪
52
00:02:05,951 --> 00:02:07,562
♪ When the tears are over ♪
53
00:02:07,649 --> 00:02:09,955
♪ And the moment has come ♪
54
00:02:10,042 --> 00:02:11,305
♪ Say my Lord ♪
55
00:02:11,392 --> 00:02:13,698
♪ I think I found someone ♪
56
00:02:13,785 --> 00:02:15,570
♪ You know it will be better ♪
57
00:02:15,657 --> 00:02:17,224
♪ 'Cause you're
puttin' it together ♪
58
00:02:17,311 --> 00:02:20,009
♪ For the second time around ♪
59
00:02:26,102 --> 00:02:27,973
♪ Step by step ♪
60
00:02:28,060 --> 00:02:29,975
♪ Day by day ♪♪ Day by day ♪
61
00:02:30,062 --> 00:02:31,760
♪ A fresh start over ♪
62
00:02:31,847 --> 00:02:33,457
♪ A different hand to play ♪
63
00:02:33,544 --> 00:02:35,459
♪ The deeper we fall ♪
64
00:02:35,546 --> 00:02:37,635
♪ The stronger we stay ♪
65
00:02:37,722 --> 00:02:39,594
♪ It will be better ♪
66
00:02:39,681 --> 00:02:41,291
♪ The second time around ♪
67
00:02:41,378 --> 00:02:43,163
♪ Step by step ♪
68
00:02:43,250 --> 00:02:45,295
♪ Day by day ♪
69
00:02:45,382 --> 00:02:47,297
♪ We'll make it better ♪
70
00:02:47,384 --> 00:02:50,126
♪ The second time around ♪♪
71
00:02:52,911 --> 00:02:55,784
[music continues]
72
00:03:02,399 --> 00:03:05,185
[instrumental music]
73
00:03:11,234 --> 00:03:12,931
Hey, Codeman, check it out.
74
00:03:13,018 --> 00:03:15,282
Those are the sisters that just
moved into town last month.
75
00:03:15,369 --> 00:03:16,892
Kellie and Kimmie Peterson.
76
00:03:16,979 --> 00:03:19,068
I hear their motto is,
"Just say yes."
77
00:03:21,462 --> 00:03:24,160
No way. Then they must know
Nancy Reagan.
78
00:03:26,728 --> 00:03:28,164
Hey, Batlina.
79
00:03:28,251 --> 00:03:31,646
Send a small soda over
to Kellie Peterson on me.
80
00:03:31,733 --> 00:03:33,256
[scoffs]
J.T., the only way
81
00:03:33,343 --> 00:03:34,910
you're gonna get
Kellie Peterson
82
00:03:34,997 --> 00:03:37,782
is with some plastic surgery
and a breath transplant.
83
00:03:39,044 --> 00:03:40,481
Schmuck.
84
00:03:40,568 --> 00:03:43,005
Major harshin'
from the Dana burger, huh?
85
00:03:43,092 --> 00:03:44,572
[J.T.]
Yeah.
86
00:03:44,659 --> 00:03:45,747
It shows how much she knows.
87
00:03:45,834 --> 00:03:47,314
I hear nobodystrikes out
88
00:03:47,401 --> 00:03:49,054
with Kellie Peterson. Ha-ha!
89
00:03:49,141 --> 00:03:50,317
Check this out.
90
00:03:57,280 --> 00:04:00,196
Hey, Kellie. You wanna go
to movies with me tonight?
91
00:04:00,283 --> 00:04:01,589
No.
92
00:04:06,463 --> 00:04:07,856
Okay.
93
00:04:11,294 --> 00:04:12,861
[giggling]
94
00:04:12,948 --> 00:04:15,211
Kellie, why'd you say no to him?
95
00:04:15,298 --> 00:04:18,127
I don't know. I just thought
I'd try something different.
96
00:04:18,214 --> 00:04:20,434
[laughing]
97
00:04:20,521 --> 00:04:22,131
Gee, I'd love to go out
with that cute one
98
00:04:22,218 --> 00:04:23,567
sitting next to him.
99
00:04:26,614 --> 00:04:29,747
Any chance you'd change your
mind so we could, uh, double?
100
00:04:29,834 --> 00:04:31,358
Sure, why not?
101
00:04:31,445 --> 00:04:32,837
Saying no wasn't as much fun
102
00:04:32,924 --> 00:04:35,231
as I thought it would be.
103
00:04:35,318 --> 00:04:37,364
Don't feel bad, cuz,
I mean, heh
104
00:04:37,451 --> 00:04:39,801
every dude strikes out
once in a while.
105
00:04:39,888 --> 00:04:42,064
But as
Alfred Lord Tennyson once said
106
00:04:42,151 --> 00:04:44,196
"'Tis better to have
loved and lost
107
00:04:44,284 --> 00:04:47,112
than never to have had
the love jones at all."
108
00:04:51,421 --> 00:04:55,599
J.T. I changed my mind.
109
00:04:55,686 --> 00:04:57,645
- You did?
- Yeah.
110
00:04:57,732 --> 00:05:00,474
Do you guys wanna go
to the movies with us tonight?
111
00:05:00,561 --> 00:05:03,477
Huh. Well, I say yes.
How about you, cuz?
112
00:05:03,564 --> 00:05:06,958
I say yes. Yes, yes. God, yes.
113
00:05:09,744 --> 00:05:11,354
Little over the top there,
eh, brother?
114
00:05:12,747 --> 00:05:15,619
[instrumental music]
115
00:05:17,665 --> 00:05:20,189
- 'Give me the sour cream.'
- 'Hey, give me a roll.'
116
00:05:20,276 --> 00:05:22,583
- Get your own roll.
- Pass the potatoes, please.
117
00:05:22,670 --> 00:05:24,628
Shut your face
and pass the butter.
118
00:05:24,715 --> 00:05:27,196
Hey, he has more
butter than me.
119
00:05:27,283 --> 00:05:30,199
Okay, here's another lobster.
120
00:05:30,286 --> 00:05:32,288
Oh, Carol, I'm sorry I'm late.
121
00:05:32,375 --> 00:05:34,072
Floyd screwed up
at work again today.
122
00:05:34,159 --> 00:05:35,160
He put a chimney on a house
that doesn't
123
00:05:35,247 --> 00:05:36,901
even have a fireplace.
124
00:05:39,382 --> 00:05:42,124
Oh, wow, lobster.
What's the occasion?
125
00:05:42,211 --> 00:05:43,995
Well, Verne at the fish shack
was so happy
126
00:05:44,082 --> 00:05:45,475
with the remodel you did,
he sent over
127
00:05:45,562 --> 00:05:47,521
an entire crate
of lobsters for us.
128
00:05:47,608 --> 00:05:50,219
Well, slap a two pounder
and a tub of butter on me
129
00:05:50,306 --> 00:05:52,308
and I'm a happy camper. He-he!
130
00:05:52,395 --> 00:05:55,006
- Ah! What's that?
- Well..
131
00:05:55,093 --> 00:05:57,095
Frank, you know, shellfish
are so high in cholesterol
132
00:05:57,182 --> 00:05:58,923
so I made you
a little tofu lobster.
133
00:05:59,010 --> 00:06:00,882
Isn't he cute?
See the little claws.
134
00:06:00,969 --> 00:06:02,884
The little tail, little eyes.
135
00:06:04,015 --> 00:06:06,322
Tofu? I don't want tofu, honey.
136
00:06:06,409 --> 00:06:08,193
I want lobster.
137
00:06:08,280 --> 00:06:09,543
They got lobster.
138
00:06:11,066 --> 00:06:13,242
And it's really quite tasty.
139
00:06:14,939 --> 00:06:16,767
It sure is.
140
00:06:16,854 --> 00:06:19,030
Mmm, this is so good.
141
00:06:20,728 --> 00:06:22,947
- Dana!
- Mom.
142
00:06:23,034 --> 00:06:24,601
I just want Frank
to know how much
143
00:06:24,688 --> 00:06:27,212
we're enjoying
the fruits of his labor.
144
00:06:27,299 --> 00:06:28,562
Thank you, Frank.
145
00:06:28,649 --> 00:06:30,564
Thank you for every tender
146
00:06:30,651 --> 00:06:31,956
succulent morsel.
147
00:06:32,043 --> 00:06:33,697
[slurping]
148
00:06:33,784 --> 00:06:35,220
Give me that..
No, no, give it..
149
00:06:35,307 --> 00:06:37,745
Hey, daddy.. Dad!
150
00:06:37,832 --> 00:06:39,747
Mine! I built the fish shack
151
00:06:39,834 --> 00:06:41,488
I get the lobster! Stop!
152
00:06:42,880 --> 00:06:44,316
Frank, before you bite
into that
153
00:06:44,404 --> 00:06:45,927
I just want to say one thing.
154
00:06:46,014 --> 00:06:47,450
With your cholesterol,
eating that lobster
155
00:06:47,537 --> 00:06:49,626
is like swallowing
a live grenade.
156
00:06:49,713 --> 00:06:52,020
A live grenade
drenched in butter.
157
00:06:54,631 --> 00:06:56,154
Alright.
158
00:06:56,241 --> 00:06:58,330
I won't eat it.
159
00:06:58,418 --> 00:07:00,507
But I do wish I had
a live grenade.
160
00:07:01,638 --> 00:07:04,511
[instrumental music]
161
00:07:08,515 --> 00:07:10,865
Yeah, my favorite part of the
flick was when Schwarzenegger
162
00:07:10,952 --> 00:07:12,388
ripped that dude's arm off
163
00:07:12,475 --> 00:07:15,391
and clubbed the other guys
with it. Ha-ha-ha!
164
00:07:15,478 --> 00:07:18,394
Boy, for me, it was
the feel-good movie of the year.
165
00:07:19,874 --> 00:07:22,572
So, what do you guys
wanna do now?
166
00:07:22,659 --> 00:07:24,313
Hey, I got an idea,
how about, uh
167
00:07:24,400 --> 00:07:26,271
we take a little drive
and check out the view
168
00:07:26,358 --> 00:07:28,535
from, oh, I don't know
169
00:07:28,622 --> 00:07:30,058
Suck Face Hill?
170
00:07:32,452 --> 00:07:34,018
Oh, I'm sick of Suck Face Hill.
171
00:07:34,105 --> 00:07:36,020
I was just there last night.
172
00:07:36,107 --> 00:07:38,414
And the night before that
and the night before that.
173
00:07:38,980 --> 00:07:40,764
[sighs]
174
00:07:40,851 --> 00:07:44,159
Well, we wouldn't wanna break
your streak now, would we?
175
00:07:44,246 --> 00:07:46,944
You know, I've got
a much more exciting idea.
176
00:07:47,031 --> 00:07:48,946
I don't think anything
could be more exciting
177
00:07:49,033 --> 00:07:50,600
than Suck Face Hill.
178
00:07:50,687 --> 00:07:52,254
Why don't we go back
to our house?
179
00:07:52,341 --> 00:07:53,385
Our parents are away.
180
00:07:53,473 --> 00:07:54,430
[giggles]
181
00:07:57,389 --> 00:07:59,087
That would bemore exciting.
182
00:08:00,741 --> 00:08:03,352
Excuse us for a minute.
We'll be right back.
183
00:08:03,439 --> 00:08:05,006
See you soon, Codeman.
184
00:08:06,050 --> 00:08:07,269
Tch-yeah.
185
00:08:09,445 --> 00:08:11,142
[sighs]
186
00:08:11,229 --> 00:08:12,970
Yeah, yeah! We're in!
187
00:08:13,057 --> 00:08:16,496
Touchdown! Tonight is the night!
188
00:08:16,583 --> 00:08:18,715
Heh, you know, J.T.,
I was thinkin'
189
00:08:18,802 --> 00:08:22,632
uh, maybe call it a night
and head home, huh?
190
00:08:22,719 --> 00:08:24,547
Head home? Why?
191
00:08:24,634 --> 00:08:25,896
Oh, you know,
it's getting kinda late
192
00:08:25,983 --> 00:08:27,115
and I still got
a lot of welding to do
193
00:08:27,202 --> 00:08:28,986
on my mom's birthday present.
194
00:08:30,901 --> 00:08:33,208
Codeman, the girls
are practically begging us
195
00:08:33,295 --> 00:08:34,644
for our bods.
196
00:08:34,731 --> 00:08:37,212
And I, for one,
don't need to be asked twice.
197
00:08:37,299 --> 00:08:39,214
Especially since
I've never been asked once.
198
00:08:41,608 --> 00:08:44,219
Yeah, well, I'm not
going to their house, dude.
199
00:08:45,307 --> 00:08:47,396
Cody, what is the problem?
200
00:08:49,267 --> 00:08:50,660
You know, I'm..
201
00:08:50,747 --> 00:08:52,749
I'm just..
202
00:08:52,836 --> 00:08:54,534
I've never, uh..
203
00:08:56,623 --> 00:08:57,754
I'm a virgin.
204
00:09:01,236 --> 00:09:03,281
You're a what?
205
00:09:03,368 --> 00:09:07,155
You know, I'm pure,
I'm fresh, untainted.
206
00:09:07,242 --> 00:09:09,766
Tch-ya!
207
00:09:09,853 --> 00:09:12,639
I have not boldly gone where
other men have gone before.
208
00:09:15,424 --> 00:09:17,992
But this can't be.
You're the Codeman.
209
00:09:18,079 --> 00:09:21,996
It's a law of nature.
Birds fly, fish swim.
210
00:09:22,083 --> 00:09:24,172
The Codeman is nota virgin.
211
00:09:24,259 --> 00:09:26,435
Tch-yeah, well, I am.
212
00:09:26,522 --> 00:09:28,045
And I don't want to get,
you know
213
00:09:28,132 --> 00:09:30,091
un-virginized. Tch-ya!.
214
00:09:32,049 --> 00:09:34,138
What are you? Crazy?
215
00:09:34,225 --> 00:09:37,838
Look, this may not make any
sense to you. That's cool.
216
00:09:37,925 --> 00:09:39,970
But it's somethin' I feel
really strongly about.
217
00:09:41,581 --> 00:09:43,626
Look, here's the keys to my van.
218
00:09:43,713 --> 00:09:46,455
You can do whatever you want,
bro. I'm goin' home.
219
00:09:49,110 --> 00:09:51,982
[instrumental music]
220
00:09:58,989 --> 00:10:01,426
[instrumental music]
221
00:10:03,211 --> 00:10:04,212
Another rice cake, Frank?
222
00:10:04,299 --> 00:10:05,648
Oh, sure. Yeah, I'd love one.
223
00:10:05,735 --> 00:10:07,302
They are tasty. Heh-he-heh.
224
00:10:16,354 --> 00:10:17,921
Hey, Carol, you were right.
225
00:10:18,008 --> 00:10:20,620
Daddy had food in his truck.
226
00:10:20,707 --> 00:10:24,275
Good Lord!
What is all that stuff?
227
00:10:24,362 --> 00:10:25,929
We entered
the perpetrator's vehicle
228
00:10:26,016 --> 00:10:27,888
at approximately 8:34 p.m.
229
00:10:27,975 --> 00:10:29,324
We proceeded to search--
230
00:10:29,411 --> 00:10:31,848
Just tell her what we found,
cheeseball.
231
00:10:33,720 --> 00:10:35,852
Four bags of Corn Nuts,
two dozen doughnut holes
232
00:10:35,939 --> 00:10:37,158
'a case of Milk Duds'
233
00:10:37,245 --> 00:10:40,770
a Boston cream pie
and a canned ham.
234
00:10:40,857 --> 00:10:42,729
A canned ham?
235
00:10:42,816 --> 00:10:45,079
Oh, Frank, you're pathetic.
236
00:10:46,776 --> 00:10:48,299
Come on, guys.
Let's go check his tool box.
237
00:10:48,386 --> 00:10:50,258
- He alwayshides food in there.
- Yeah.
238
00:10:50,345 --> 00:10:51,433
- Yeah.
- Hey, guys, wait, wait.
239
00:10:51,520 --> 00:10:52,956
Don't touch that pepperoni!
240
00:10:58,745 --> 00:11:00,747
[Frank]
'Hey, Cody.'
241
00:11:00,834 --> 00:11:02,792
Hey, Uncle Frank. Hey, Carol.
242
00:11:02,879 --> 00:11:04,881
Hey, pal, w-why the long face?
243
00:11:04,968 --> 00:11:07,101
Oh, I don't know.
244
00:11:07,188 --> 00:11:09,712
I think it comes from my mom's
side of the family, you know?
245
00:11:12,193 --> 00:11:15,718
We all kinda got that Jay Leno
thing going on.
246
00:11:15,805 --> 00:11:19,548
Uh, no, Cody,
I meant, you seem a little down.
247
00:11:19,635 --> 00:11:21,463
Do you wanna talk about it?
248
00:11:21,550 --> 00:11:23,465
Oh, yeah, I do. Hah.
249
00:11:24,988 --> 00:11:26,773
But you may not wanna
hear this, Carol.
250
00:11:26,860 --> 00:11:28,600
Heh, it's kind of personal.
251
00:11:28,688 --> 00:11:31,125
Oh, no, I mean,
you may be Frank's nephew
252
00:11:31,212 --> 00:11:33,301
but I still care
about your problems.
253
00:11:33,388 --> 00:11:35,042
Well, okay then. Heh..
254
00:11:35,129 --> 00:11:36,608
It's about my sex life.
255
00:11:36,696 --> 00:11:39,611
Okay. Well, uh, I have to go.
256
00:11:42,745 --> 00:11:46,096
Okay, pal. What's the problem?
257
00:11:46,183 --> 00:11:48,446
J.T. and I went out with
the Peterson sisters tonight.
258
00:11:48,533 --> 00:11:52,189
Heh. Totally awesomechicks,
Uncle Frank.
259
00:11:52,276 --> 00:11:54,278
Kimmie Peterson liked me a lot.
260
00:11:54,365 --> 00:11:56,628
In fact, she liked me a way lot.
261
00:11:56,716 --> 00:11:58,021
A way, way, way--
262
00:11:58,108 --> 00:12:00,154
Y-yeah, Cody, I'm with you.
263
00:12:00,241 --> 00:12:01,546
I understand, yeah.
264
00:12:01,633 --> 00:12:02,678
Kimmie likes you a way lot
265
00:12:02,765 --> 00:12:04,724
but I'm not hearin' a problem.
266
00:12:04,811 --> 00:12:07,161
Oh. Well, okay.
267
00:12:07,248 --> 00:12:09,250
She liked me so much
she wanted to take me back
268
00:12:09,337 --> 00:12:10,555
to her house and, uh..
269
00:12:11,818 --> 00:12:13,733
...do the wild monkey dance.
270
00:12:17,780 --> 00:12:21,349
- "The wild monkey dance."
- That's right.
271
00:12:21,436 --> 00:12:23,438
I didn't wanna do that.
272
00:12:23,525 --> 00:12:25,614
I'm saving myself for true love.
273
00:12:25,701 --> 00:12:28,051
Uh, Cody, uh, could I
back you up here a minute
274
00:12:28,138 --> 00:12:30,880
and ask you where
J.T. is right now?
275
00:12:30,967 --> 00:12:32,142
Probably at the Petersons
276
00:12:32,229 --> 00:12:34,014
notsaving himselffor true love.
277
00:12:35,885 --> 00:12:37,539
That does it.
I'm going to the Petersons.
278
00:12:39,410 --> 00:12:42,544
Wow, what a swell night
this has been.
279
00:12:42,631 --> 00:12:44,111
Alright, J.T.
280
00:12:44,198 --> 00:12:46,766
I'm going to ask you
a man-to-man question
281
00:12:46,853 --> 00:12:49,333
and I want a very
serious answer.
282
00:12:49,420 --> 00:12:51,596
Were you doin' the wild
monkey dance tonight?
283
00:12:54,556 --> 00:12:56,427
Relax, dad.
Nothing happened.
284
00:12:56,514 --> 00:12:57,689
Thanks to Codeman.
285
00:12:57,777 --> 00:12:59,604
Kimmie was so upset
when you ditched her
286
00:12:59,691 --> 00:13:01,389
that the girls just went home.
287
00:13:01,476 --> 00:13:04,348
- I'm sorry, cuz.
- Hey, sure. No problem.
288
00:13:04,435 --> 00:13:06,350
I'll just go upstairs
and write "Not tonight"
289
00:13:06,437 --> 00:13:09,179
in my diary
for the 5000th time!
290
00:13:11,225 --> 00:13:14,184
You know somethin', Codeman?
You're a real whacko.
291
00:13:14,271 --> 00:13:15,795
Now, wait a minute, J.T.
292
00:13:15,882 --> 00:13:18,623
that's no way to talk
to your best friend.
293
00:13:18,710 --> 00:13:20,625
Oh, that's okay, Uncle Frank.
294
00:13:20,712 --> 00:13:24,586
Maybe he's right.
Heh, am I a whacko?
295
00:13:24,673 --> 00:13:27,415
Am I from another galaxy?
Tch-eh!
296
00:13:27,502 --> 00:13:30,940
Am I totally out of touch
with reality as we know it?
297
00:13:34,422 --> 00:13:36,206
Wha-what was that
first choice again?
298
00:13:38,121 --> 00:13:41,603
I don't know what to do,
you know? Tch-eh!
299
00:13:41,690 --> 00:13:45,737
I mean, I'm tryin' to stay
totally pure and chaste
300
00:13:45,825 --> 00:13:47,696
while these nubile young foxes
301
00:13:47,783 --> 00:13:50,394
are throwin' themselves
at me all the time.
302
00:13:50,481 --> 00:13:52,092
Wouldn't it drive you crazy
303
00:13:52,179 --> 00:13:55,095
if you had these beautiful,
gorgeous, awesome babes
304
00:13:55,182 --> 00:13:56,923
like, jumpin' on you
night and day, sayin'
305
00:13:57,010 --> 00:14:00,404
"Take me, take me?"
Tch-eh!
306
00:14:00,491 --> 00:14:02,363
Makes me a little crazy
just hearin' about it.
307
00:14:05,018 --> 00:14:06,367
Totally.
308
00:14:06,454 --> 00:14:08,456
I mean, hey, I'm a normal dude.
309
00:14:08,543 --> 00:14:10,675
[chuckles]
I have urges.
310
00:14:10,762 --> 00:14:14,549
I read the swimsuit edition
like everybody else...you know?
311
00:14:14,636 --> 00:14:17,421
But I'm tryin' to make
a moral decision here.
312
00:14:17,508 --> 00:14:20,729
I wanna stay pure
for the dudette of my dreams.
313
00:14:20,816 --> 00:14:23,688
Well, then do it.
I-I don't mean do it.
314
00:14:23,775 --> 00:14:26,387
Uh, th-the monkey thing, uh..
315
00:14:26,474 --> 00:14:28,824
- I mean, you know what I mean.
- Yeah.
316
00:14:28,911 --> 00:14:30,739
I wanna stick
to what I believe in
317
00:14:30,826 --> 00:14:34,134
but my best friend
thinks I'm a whacko, tch-ya!
318
00:14:34,221 --> 00:14:35,613
And worst part about it
319
00:14:35,700 --> 00:14:37,398
I'm beginning to wonder
if he's right.
320
00:14:37,485 --> 00:14:39,879
Yeah, listen, Cody,
a lot of teenagers think
321
00:14:39,966 --> 00:14:41,837
they're ready for sex,
but emotionally they're not.
322
00:14:41,924 --> 00:14:44,144
Now, I personally think
it makes a lot of sense
323
00:14:44,231 --> 00:14:45,885
for a guy to wait.
324
00:14:45,972 --> 00:14:49,192
But you're the only one who can
decide what's right for you.
325
00:14:49,279 --> 00:14:51,194
Yeah. I know, Uncle Frank.
326
00:14:53,066 --> 00:14:54,763
I just gotta figure out
what that is.
327
00:14:56,417 --> 00:14:57,374
Thanks.
328
00:14:58,636 --> 00:15:01,509
[instrumental music]
329
00:15:03,772 --> 00:15:06,688
[crickets chirping]
330
00:15:44,595 --> 00:15:45,814
[laughs]
331
00:15:51,602 --> 00:15:52,560
- Okay.
- Huh?
332
00:15:53,865 --> 00:15:55,476
Give me the ice cream.
333
00:15:55,563 --> 00:15:58,392
It's mine. I found it.
334
00:15:58,479 --> 00:16:00,220
- Frank..
- Ha!
335
00:16:00,307 --> 00:16:02,831
I love you, Carol, but you
try to touch my ice cream
336
00:16:02,918 --> 00:16:04,789
you'll be dead
before you hit the floor.
337
00:16:07,401 --> 00:16:10,882
Okay, Frank,
just put down the can
338
00:16:10,970 --> 00:16:12,710
and step away
from the ice cream.
339
00:16:17,454 --> 00:16:18,760
- No.
- Frank!
340
00:16:18,847 --> 00:16:21,023
Ha-uh, I'm warnin' you.
341
00:16:21,110 --> 00:16:22,982
I'm not afraid to use this.
342
00:16:26,159 --> 00:16:28,248
Oh, you're gonna
clean that up, mister.
343
00:16:30,641 --> 00:16:33,079
I don't care. It's worth it.
344
00:16:33,166 --> 00:16:36,473
Frank, you gotta get
your mind off junk food.
345
00:16:36,560 --> 00:16:39,694
Now, I'll tell you what,
if you come back to bed
346
00:16:39,781 --> 00:16:42,305
we can play the lucky burglar.
347
00:16:48,355 --> 00:16:49,443
W-well, I..
348
00:16:51,749 --> 00:16:55,449
Frank, it's either
junk food or...me.
349
00:17:02,934 --> 00:17:05,198
This used to be
such an easy choice.
350
00:17:07,287 --> 00:17:10,203
- Frank!
- Oh, okay, I-I, uh-uh.. You.
351
00:17:10,290 --> 00:17:13,989
- I choose you.
- Oh, good.
352
00:17:14,076 --> 00:17:15,947
Uh, could we put a little
whipped cream behind your ear?
353
00:17:16,035 --> 00:17:18,341
- Frank.
- Chocolate sauce?
354
00:17:18,428 --> 00:17:19,560
No! Choc..
355
00:17:19,647 --> 00:17:21,127
- No.
- Oh!
356
00:17:21,214 --> 00:17:24,086
[instrumental music]
357
00:17:27,089 --> 00:17:29,265
- Oh, hi, mom.
- Hi, girls. How was work?
358
00:17:29,352 --> 00:17:31,137
Very interesting.
359
00:17:31,224 --> 00:17:34,314
Everyone's talking about how
Cody ditched Kimmie Peterson.
360
00:17:34,401 --> 00:17:37,360
Yeah? Well, why is that such
a hot topic of conversation?
361
00:17:37,447 --> 00:17:39,188
Because it doesn't
make any sense.
362
00:17:39,275 --> 00:17:43,105
No guy has ever turned down
Kimmie Peterson.
363
00:17:43,192 --> 00:17:44,585
Well, it makes perfect sense.
364
00:17:44,672 --> 00:17:45,934
Frank told me that Cody's saving
365
00:17:46,021 --> 00:17:47,370
himself for true love.
366
00:17:49,503 --> 00:17:51,244
Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
367
00:17:51,331 --> 00:17:54,247
Are you saying
that Cody is a virgin?
368
00:17:54,334 --> 00:17:56,597
Well, why is that
so hard to believe?
369
00:17:56,684 --> 00:18:00,427
'Cause 80% of the guys
his age aren't.
370
00:18:00,514 --> 00:18:03,430
"Eighty percent?"
Eighty percent?
371
00:18:03,517 --> 00:18:06,259
Who are all these boys
sleeping with?
372
00:18:06,346 --> 00:18:08,087
I don't know.
Local girls, I guess.
373
00:18:09,653 --> 00:18:11,351
How local?
374
00:18:11,438 --> 00:18:12,613
I mean, like, local in this town
375
00:18:12,700 --> 00:18:14,180
or-or-or, uh
376
00:18:14,267 --> 00:18:15,833
local in this kitchen?
377
00:18:18,097 --> 00:18:21,187
Mom, relax, I'm still pure
and Karen hasn't done it
378
00:18:21,274 --> 00:18:22,710
more than 15 or 20 times.
379
00:18:22,797 --> 00:18:25,452
[both gasp]
380
00:18:25,539 --> 00:18:28,194
That is not true.
Mom, ask any guy at school.
381
00:18:28,281 --> 00:18:29,673
I'm just a tease.
382
00:18:32,807 --> 00:18:34,504
Oh, good girl.
383
00:18:34,591 --> 00:18:35,810
[chuckles]
384
00:18:38,595 --> 00:18:41,120
Look, mom, you've talked
to us about sex a lot.
385
00:18:41,207 --> 00:18:43,296
We get the message.
We know you want us to wait.
386
00:18:43,383 --> 00:18:45,211
Well, I'm not trying
to force anything on you.
387
00:18:45,298 --> 00:18:47,038
It's just my opinion.
388
00:18:47,126 --> 00:18:49,998
And-and-and you are certainly
entitled to your opinion.
389
00:18:50,085 --> 00:18:51,042
I just wanna make sure
390
00:18:51,130 --> 00:18:52,261
that your opinion
391
00:18:52,348 --> 00:18:54,611
ismy opinion.
392
00:18:54,698 --> 00:18:56,700
And I'm so glad it is.
393
00:18:56,787 --> 00:18:58,311
Oh, my little angels.
394
00:18:58,398 --> 00:18:59,442
[giggles]
395
00:18:59,529 --> 00:19:02,402
[instrumental music]
396
00:19:05,187 --> 00:19:06,623
[Cody sighs]
397
00:19:10,932 --> 00:19:12,977
- Hey, Codeman.
- Hey, cuz.
398
00:19:13,064 --> 00:19:14,109
Here's the bandage you wanted.
399
00:19:14,196 --> 00:19:17,068
Oh, thanks, bro. Tch-uh.
400
00:19:17,156 --> 00:19:18,505
Look..
401
00:19:18,592 --> 00:19:20,898
I'm sorry I called you a whacko.
402
00:19:20,985 --> 00:19:22,770
I was really out of line.
403
00:19:22,857 --> 00:19:24,641
Uh, it's okay, bro.
404
00:19:24,728 --> 00:19:26,513
No, no, it's not.
405
00:19:26,600 --> 00:19:29,255
It's just that lately
my hormones have gone turbo
406
00:19:29,342 --> 00:19:30,952
and taken over my brain.
407
00:19:32,823 --> 00:19:34,085
That ever happened to you, Cody?
408
00:19:34,173 --> 00:19:36,175
Tch-yeah, all the time, dude.
409
00:19:37,828 --> 00:19:42,268
Yeah, it's the burden
of manhood...you know?
410
00:19:42,355 --> 00:19:45,227
But that doesn't mean we can
walk around like cavemen, sayin'
411
00:19:45,314 --> 00:19:47,664
"Hey, cave babe,
how about a bronto burger
412
00:19:47,751 --> 00:19:48,839
and a little cave whoopee?"
413
00:19:48,926 --> 00:19:50,319
[chuckles]
You know?
414
00:19:52,713 --> 00:19:54,454
I know what you mean.
415
00:19:54,541 --> 00:19:56,891
I'm not real proud
of the way I've been acting.
416
00:19:56,978 --> 00:19:59,415
Not surprised after last night,
dad hasn't called me
417
00:19:59,502 --> 00:20:01,939
into his workshop for one
of his little man-to-man chats.
418
00:20:02,026 --> 00:20:03,767
[laughing]
419
00:20:03,854 --> 00:20:06,596
Oh, J.T., could I see you
for a minute in the workshop?
420
00:20:10,600 --> 00:20:12,646
Well, Codeman, hah,
see you in a couple of hours.
421
00:20:12,733 --> 00:20:14,778
Yeah. Hang tough, dude.
422
00:20:20,654 --> 00:20:23,309
- Cody?
- Oh, hey, Kimmie.
423
00:20:23,396 --> 00:20:26,225
- How's it goin'?
- Okay, I guess.
424
00:20:26,312 --> 00:20:28,052
Could we talk for a second?
425
00:20:28,139 --> 00:20:29,489
Sure. What's up?
426
00:20:31,055 --> 00:20:32,970
Um. Uh..
427
00:20:33,057 --> 00:20:35,364
I was just wondering
why you took off last night.
428
00:20:35,451 --> 00:20:38,411
I mean...nobody's ever
done that to me before.
429
00:20:39,542 --> 00:20:41,501
Don't you like me?
430
00:20:41,588 --> 00:20:43,677
Oh, sure, I like you.
431
00:20:43,764 --> 00:20:46,549
Then why didn't you wanna go
back to my house with me?
432
00:20:46,636 --> 00:20:48,247
[sighs]
You know,
I was up half the night
433
00:20:48,334 --> 00:20:49,813
tryin' to figure things out.
434
00:20:49,900 --> 00:20:51,337
And then I got up
real early this morning.
435
00:20:51,424 --> 00:20:53,643
I went to the rock quarry. Heh.
436
00:20:53,730 --> 00:20:56,864
And I just walked
around...thinking.
437
00:20:56,951 --> 00:20:58,169
And after four hours
438
00:20:58,257 --> 00:21:01,085
I came to two major conclusions.
439
00:21:01,172 --> 00:21:04,741
Number one, if you're gonna be
walking around a rock quarry
440
00:21:04,828 --> 00:21:05,916
wear shoes.
441
00:21:08,223 --> 00:21:11,705
And number two,
I think that a dude and a babe
442
00:21:11,792 --> 00:21:14,447
should hang out together,
get to know each other
443
00:21:14,534 --> 00:21:16,449
fall in love
and get married, you know?
444
00:21:16,536 --> 00:21:19,669
Before they, uh,
constipate the relationship.
445
00:21:22,672 --> 00:21:25,196
Are you saying we could
go out and have fun
446
00:21:25,284 --> 00:21:27,851
just going to the movies
or talking
447
00:21:27,938 --> 00:21:29,766
and not have sex?
448
00:21:29,853 --> 00:21:33,161
- Uh, well, yeah.
- And you'd still like me?
449
00:21:33,248 --> 00:21:34,380
Sure.
450
00:21:34,467 --> 00:21:36,773
[giggles]
451
00:21:36,860 --> 00:21:39,689
Kimmie,
you're a pretty righteous babe.
452
00:21:39,776 --> 00:21:41,909
Once you get that giggling
thing under wraps.
453
00:21:45,304 --> 00:21:46,957
Huh!
454
00:21:47,044 --> 00:21:51,135
You know, this might be
kinda personal, but uh..
455
00:21:51,222 --> 00:21:52,572
...now, you might
wanna give some thought
456
00:21:52,659 --> 00:21:55,270
into changing your lifestyle
a little bit.
457
00:21:55,357 --> 00:21:58,142
This AIDS stuff
is really dangerous.
458
00:21:58,229 --> 00:22:00,406
I wouldn't wanna see
anything happen to you.
459
00:22:02,843 --> 00:22:04,279
Wow, Cody, I..
460
00:22:04,366 --> 00:22:07,021
I've never met anyone
like you before.
461
00:22:07,108 --> 00:22:09,893
You know, it's weird.
I hear that all the time.
462
00:22:12,766 --> 00:22:14,463
You wanna get somethin' to eat?
463
00:22:14,550 --> 00:22:16,378
Sure. I'm starving.
464
00:22:16,465 --> 00:22:17,945
Come on over
to my Uncle Frank's truck.
465
00:22:18,032 --> 00:22:20,426
- I'll make you a ham sandwich.
- Okay.
466
00:22:20,513 --> 00:22:23,385
[instrumental music]
467
00:22:30,610 --> 00:22:32,002
Hey, pizza guy!
468
00:22:33,090 --> 00:22:34,091
Huh?
469
00:22:35,223 --> 00:22:36,572
Don't touch that door!
470
00:22:38,661 --> 00:22:39,923
Are you Fr..
471
00:22:41,142 --> 00:22:43,144
Yes, I'm Frank Lambert.
472
00:22:43,231 --> 00:22:45,451
Now, here's your money.
473
00:22:45,538 --> 00:22:48,149
Plus the ten-dollar tip
I promised ya.
474
00:22:48,236 --> 00:22:49,846
- Thanks.
- Hey!
475
00:22:51,152 --> 00:22:53,241
What is this?
I ordered pepperoni.
476
00:22:53,328 --> 00:22:55,199
A tofu pizza.
477
00:22:55,286 --> 00:22:58,594
A tofu..
I gave you a ten-dollar tip.
478
00:23:00,161 --> 00:23:02,250
Yeah, but, uh..
479
00:23:02,337 --> 00:23:04,165
...I promised him a 20.
480
00:23:04,252 --> 00:23:06,559
[instrumental music]
34184
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