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1
00:00:00,826 --> 00:00:01,958
[instrumental music]
2
00:00:03,699 --> 00:00:05,788
Hey, he's coming, he's coming.
Everybody hide.
3
00:00:10,445 --> 00:00:11,750
[all]
Surprise!
4
00:00:11,837 --> 00:00:12,795
Whoa!
5
00:00:14,188 --> 00:00:15,450
Blow my mind.
6
00:00:15,537 --> 00:00:16,973
[all]
Happy birthday!
7
00:00:17,060 --> 00:00:18,496
Great. Thanks. Yeah.
8
00:00:18,583 --> 00:00:20,324
- Were you surprised?
- Totally.
9
00:00:20,411 --> 00:00:22,761
I didn't even know
it was my birthday.
10
00:00:22,848 --> 00:00:24,067
Dude, how old am I?
11
00:00:24,154 --> 00:00:26,548
- Nineteen.
- Nineteen?
12
00:00:26,635 --> 00:00:28,419
What happened to 16 through 18?
13
00:00:31,292 --> 00:00:34,164
[theme song]
14
00:00:45,480 --> 00:00:48,178
[screaming]
15
00:00:50,528 --> 00:00:51,747
♪ The dream wide broken ♪
16
00:00:51,834 --> 00:00:53,705
♪ Seemed like all was lost ♪
17
00:00:53,792 --> 00:00:55,664
♪ What would be the future ♪
18
00:00:55,751 --> 00:00:57,405
♪ Could you pay the cost ♪
19
00:00:57,492 --> 00:00:58,449
♪ You wonder ♪
20
00:00:58,536 --> 00:00:59,885
♪ Will there ever be ♪
21
00:00:59,972 --> 00:01:02,279
♪ A second time around ♪
22
00:01:03,976 --> 00:01:05,108
♪ Whoa whoa ♪
23
00:01:05,195 --> 00:01:07,067
♪ When the tears are over ♪
24
00:01:07,154 --> 00:01:09,243
♪ And the moment has come ♪
25
00:01:09,330 --> 00:01:13,073
♪ Say my Lord
I think I found someone ♪
26
00:01:13,160 --> 00:01:14,857
♪ You know it will be better ♪
27
00:01:14,944 --> 00:01:16,554
♪ 'Cause you're putting it
together ♪
28
00:01:16,641 --> 00:01:19,601
♪ For the second time around ♪
29
00:01:22,169 --> 00:01:25,824
♪ We got the woman and man ♪♪ Ooh-ooh-ooh ♪
30
00:01:25,911 --> 00:01:29,698
♪ We got the kids in the clan ♪♪ Ooh-ooh-ooh ♪
31
00:01:29,785 --> 00:01:31,917
♪ Only time will tell ♪
32
00:01:32,004 --> 00:01:33,484
♪ If all these dreams ♪
33
00:01:33,571 --> 00:01:36,096
♪ Fit under one umbrella ♪
34
00:01:40,665 --> 00:01:42,450
♪ Step by step ♪
35
00:01:42,537 --> 00:01:44,452
♪ Day by day ♪
36
00:01:44,539 --> 00:01:46,193
♪ A fresh start over ♪
37
00:01:46,280 --> 00:01:48,325
♪ A different hand to play ♪
38
00:01:48,412 --> 00:01:49,979
♪ The deeper we fall ♪
39
00:01:50,066 --> 00:01:52,416
♪ The stronger we stay ♪
40
00:01:52,503 --> 00:01:54,288
♪ And we'll be better ♪
41
00:01:54,375 --> 00:01:55,898
♪ The second time around ♪
42
00:01:55,985 --> 00:01:57,769
♪ Step by step ♪
43
00:01:57,856 --> 00:01:59,815
♪ Day by day ♪♪ Day by day ♪
44
00:01:59,902 --> 00:02:01,512
♪ A fresh start over ♪
45
00:02:01,599 --> 00:02:03,210
♪ A different hand to play ♪
46
00:02:03,297 --> 00:02:04,863
♪ Only time will tell ♪
47
00:02:04,950 --> 00:02:07,605
♪ But you know what they say ♪
48
00:02:07,692 --> 00:02:09,651
♪ We'll make it better ♪
49
00:02:09,738 --> 00:02:11,870
♪ The second time around ♪♪
50
00:02:24,666 --> 00:02:26,842
[instrumental music]
51
00:02:33,849 --> 00:02:37,113
I swear, Tina is the most
beautiful girl I've ever seen.
52
00:02:39,028 --> 00:02:40,508
I bet she doesn't
even know I'm alive.
53
00:02:40,595 --> 00:02:42,858
Oh, she knows.
She just doesn't care.
54
00:02:44,903 --> 00:02:46,470
I got to get a date with her.
55
00:02:46,557 --> 00:02:48,690
Forget it, J.T.,
you can't just walk up
56
00:02:48,777 --> 00:02:50,561
to a girl like that
and say hi.
57
00:02:50,648 --> 00:02:52,346
You have to have an in.
58
00:02:55,218 --> 00:02:57,177
- Hi, guys.
- Hi, how are you?
59
00:02:57,264 --> 00:02:59,483
I think my in just walked in.
60
00:02:59,570 --> 00:03:01,050
Excuse me, guys.
61
00:03:03,052 --> 00:03:05,794
[indistinct chatter]
62
00:03:07,099 --> 00:03:10,146
Psst, psst, Dana!
63
00:03:10,233 --> 00:03:11,756
Psst!
64
00:03:26,118 --> 00:03:28,077
J.T., I told you to stay
65
00:03:28,164 --> 00:03:29,905
at least a 100 feet away
from me.
66
00:03:29,992 --> 00:03:31,472
What do I have to do,
get a court order?
67
00:03:33,561 --> 00:03:35,345
Relax, this is
no treat for me either.
68
00:03:35,432 --> 00:03:37,173
But I gotta ask you a big favor.
69
00:03:37,260 --> 00:03:39,131
I want you
to introduce me to Tina.
70
00:03:40,394 --> 00:03:41,438
And I want world peace.
71
00:03:41,525 --> 00:03:43,048
I think I've got a better shot.
72
00:03:44,528 --> 00:03:46,530
Come on, Dana,
name your price.
73
00:03:46,617 --> 00:03:49,229
Ooh, name my price?
74
00:03:49,316 --> 00:03:50,621
This could be fun.
75
00:03:51,927 --> 00:03:53,450
I've got it.
76
00:03:53,537 --> 00:03:55,670
If I introduce you to Tina
77
00:03:55,757 --> 00:03:58,281
for the next week, I own you.
78
00:03:58,368 --> 00:03:59,761
What do you mean "own?"
79
00:03:59,848 --> 00:04:02,459
"Own" as in you are my slave
and do anything I ask.
80
00:04:02,546 --> 00:04:04,026
No way.
81
00:04:04,113 --> 00:04:05,636
Then, no Tina.
82
00:04:07,943 --> 00:04:09,553
She is pretty, isn't she?
83
00:04:12,817 --> 00:04:15,298
My mind says, "No,"
but my hormones say, "Yes!"
84
00:04:16,691 --> 00:04:17,779
Okay.
85
00:04:24,438 --> 00:04:27,092
How about this, Frank?
How does this look?
86
00:04:27,179 --> 00:04:29,269
We-well, that's fine.
87
00:04:30,792 --> 00:04:32,054
Just fine?
88
00:04:32,141 --> 00:04:33,664
Frank, I've never
met your father before.
89
00:04:33,751 --> 00:04:35,666
I wanna make a good impression.
Fine's not good enough.
90
00:04:35,753 --> 00:04:37,059
O-o-okay, okay, um..
91
00:04:37,146 --> 00:04:39,888
That's fine and dandy.
92
00:04:42,107 --> 00:04:43,718
- I gotta take this off.
- Hey, o-oh..
93
00:04:43,805 --> 00:04:45,546
[chuckles]
Well, that will make
an impression.
94
00:04:48,462 --> 00:04:52,292
Frank, I'm so excited
about meeting your dad.
95
00:04:52,379 --> 00:04:54,424
Mom, you're not
wearing that, are you?
96
00:05:00,256 --> 00:05:02,084
- No.
- Yes, yes, she is.
97
00:05:02,171 --> 00:05:03,433
[doorbell rings]
Oh, that's him.
98
00:05:03,520 --> 00:05:05,566
Oh, I-I'll get it, honey.
Now, trust me.
99
00:05:05,653 --> 00:05:07,089
You look great.
100
00:05:07,176 --> 00:05:08,133
Okay.
101
00:05:10,092 --> 00:05:12,094
[both chuckling]
102
00:05:12,181 --> 00:05:13,704
Is that the little runt?
103
00:05:15,140 --> 00:05:16,881
Is that the old buzzard?
104
00:05:18,361 --> 00:05:20,450
Excuse me.
105
00:05:20,537 --> 00:05:21,799
That's my father.
106
00:05:21,886 --> 00:05:23,584
[grunting]
107
00:05:29,546 --> 00:05:30,895
Frank, Frank,
is this your father
108
00:05:30,982 --> 00:05:32,027
or should I call the police?
109
00:05:32,114 --> 00:05:34,072
[grunts]
110
00:05:34,159 --> 00:05:37,511
No. No, honey, uh,
this is my father.
111
00:05:37,598 --> 00:05:38,816
Oh, you must be Carol.
112
00:05:38,903 --> 00:05:39,948
- Yeah.
- You were right, Frank.
113
00:05:40,035 --> 00:05:41,906
- She's a looker.
- Yeah.
114
00:05:41,993 --> 00:05:43,212
Oh, thank you.
115
00:05:43,299 --> 00:05:44,735
A-and this is
my daughter, Karen.
116
00:05:44,822 --> 00:05:47,303
Oh, my goodness,
it runs in the family.
117
00:05:47,390 --> 00:05:49,784
You certainly are
a beautiful young lady.
118
00:05:49,871 --> 00:05:51,351
[chuckles]
I know.
119
00:05:52,352 --> 00:05:53,875
- Grandpa!
- Hey!
120
00:05:55,050 --> 00:05:56,007
[chuckles]
121
00:05:56,094 --> 00:05:57,400
[grunts]
122
00:06:02,710 --> 00:06:04,538
Oh, and this is
my step-brother, Mark.
123
00:06:04,625 --> 00:06:06,409
- Nice to meet you.
- How you doin', little fella?
124
00:06:06,496 --> 00:06:09,369
[screaming]
125
00:06:13,416 --> 00:06:14,374
[sighs]
126
00:06:15,375 --> 00:06:16,898
That was real fun.
127
00:06:19,379 --> 00:06:22,817
Excuse me, I think I'm about
to have deja vuwith my lunch.
128
00:06:24,166 --> 00:06:26,864
Alright, he's gonna puke!
129
00:06:30,128 --> 00:06:32,217
Well, come on in, Bill.
Sit down.
130
00:06:32,304 --> 00:06:33,828
Thank you.
131
00:06:33,915 --> 00:06:35,220
- Hey, dad.
- Yeah?
132
00:06:35,307 --> 00:06:36,396
How-how are things in Dubuque?
133
00:06:36,483 --> 00:06:39,007
Oh, you know,
same old stuff.
134
00:06:39,094 --> 00:06:40,617
Finally put in
a new water heater.
135
00:06:40,704 --> 00:06:43,533
Put snow tires on the truck.
136
00:06:43,620 --> 00:06:44,969
Gettin' married next week.
137
00:06:45,056 --> 00:06:46,406
Got cable TV.
138
00:06:47,972 --> 00:06:50,497
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa..
139
00:06:50,584 --> 00:06:52,281
Back up just a little bit,
that's big news.
140
00:06:52,368 --> 00:06:53,413
Oh, you bet your life it is.
141
00:06:53,500 --> 00:06:55,632
I got 36 channels.
142
00:06:55,719 --> 00:06:57,591
Uh, no, I think, uh
143
00:06:57,678 --> 00:06:59,810
Frank was more interested
in the getting-married part.
144
00:06:59,897 --> 00:07:02,465
Yeah. I mean, who is she?
When do we get to meet her, huh?
145
00:07:02,552 --> 00:07:04,598
[doorbell dings]
146
00:07:04,685 --> 00:07:05,773
How about now?
147
00:07:07,644 --> 00:07:09,472
- Oh.
- I'll get it.
148
00:07:09,559 --> 00:07:12,170
I bet you, it's Mrs. Swenson
from your bingo group.
149
00:07:12,257 --> 00:07:13,520
No.
150
00:07:13,607 --> 00:07:15,043
Okay, then it's Edna Phillips
from church.
151
00:07:15,130 --> 00:07:17,001
Frank, you never saw her
before in your life.
152
00:07:17,088 --> 00:07:18,133
Oh!
153
00:07:24,356 --> 00:07:26,663
Hi, I'm Luanne Dexter.
154
00:07:27,882 --> 00:07:29,753
- Flower.
- Peaches.
155
00:07:31,886 --> 00:07:33,888
[grunts]
156
00:07:33,975 --> 00:07:36,107
Frankie, Carol
157
00:07:36,194 --> 00:07:38,458
I want you to meet
the next Mrs. Lambert.
158
00:07:39,720 --> 00:07:41,025
H-hi, mom.
159
00:07:44,246 --> 00:07:47,162
[instrumental music]
160
00:07:49,164 --> 00:07:51,514
- Here you go, grandpa.
- Oh, thanks, pal.
161
00:07:51,601 --> 00:07:53,473
So, where did you two meet?
162
00:07:53,560 --> 00:07:55,692
[laughing]
163
00:07:55,779 --> 00:07:57,433
You're never gonna believe this.
164
00:07:57,520 --> 00:07:59,479
- We met at a truck stop.
- Yeah.
165
00:08:00,654 --> 00:08:03,352
Right out on Interstate 94.
166
00:08:03,439 --> 00:08:04,832
- Really?
- 'Yeah.'
167
00:08:04,919 --> 00:08:07,008
I never have any luck there.
168
00:08:09,750 --> 00:08:11,229
Well, we'd like
to stay for dinner
169
00:08:11,316 --> 00:08:12,927
but we have other plans.
170
00:08:13,014 --> 00:08:15,320
Besides, we weren't invited.
171
00:08:15,407 --> 00:08:16,844
What do you mean "we?"
172
00:08:16,931 --> 00:08:19,150
You mean, they invited you?
173
00:08:19,237 --> 00:08:20,891
I guess Carol doesn't
want me around.
174
00:08:20,978 --> 00:08:22,676
She can't handle
the competition.
175
00:08:25,113 --> 00:08:26,636
Yeah, that's it.
176
00:08:32,337 --> 00:08:34,252
Boy, your house is so homey.
177
00:08:34,339 --> 00:08:36,124
Oh, would you like me
to give you a grand tour?
178
00:08:36,211 --> 00:08:37,560
We'd be delighted, sir.
179
00:08:37,647 --> 00:08:38,735
Okay.
180
00:08:38,822 --> 00:08:41,085
Now, if you look closely
181
00:08:41,172 --> 00:08:42,826
you'll notice this house
is a good example
182
00:08:42,913 --> 00:08:45,220
of pre-war
suburban architecture.
183
00:08:48,005 --> 00:08:49,746
I told you he was a nerd.
184
00:08:57,145 --> 00:08:59,234
J.T., where have you been?
185
00:08:59,321 --> 00:09:00,627
You almost missed dinner.
186
00:09:00,714 --> 00:09:03,064
Just running
a couple of errands.
187
00:09:03,151 --> 00:09:04,718
There's your dry-cleaning, Dana.
188
00:09:04,805 --> 00:09:07,285
And here's all the books
you wanted from the library.
189
00:09:09,374 --> 00:09:10,854
Aren't you forgetting something?
190
00:09:14,945 --> 00:09:16,773
Here are your pantyhose.
191
00:09:20,472 --> 00:09:21,996
Control top?
192
00:09:23,606 --> 00:09:26,261
Oh, no, no, no, no, J.T.
193
00:09:27,741 --> 00:09:30,091
You'll just have to
exchange those tomorrow.
194
00:09:30,178 --> 00:09:32,180
But that won't be
a problem, will it?
195
00:09:32,267 --> 00:09:33,660
No, ma'am.
196
00:09:36,358 --> 00:09:37,838
Ma'am?
197
00:09:37,925 --> 00:09:41,145
J.T., what is going on here?
198
00:09:41,232 --> 00:09:42,538
You wanna know
what's goin' on here?
199
00:09:42,625 --> 00:09:44,322
I'll tell you
what's goin' on here.
200
00:09:46,498 --> 00:09:49,589
I am trying to be
a better step-brother to Dana.
201
00:09:51,373 --> 00:09:52,983
So, we're getting along now?
202
00:09:53,070 --> 00:09:54,463
How come nobody told me?
203
00:09:56,508 --> 00:09:58,989
Something nice is going on here,
and I don't like it.
204
00:10:03,646 --> 00:10:05,126
What is the matter
with you, Frank?
205
00:10:05,213 --> 00:10:07,041
You haven't said a word
all evening.
206
00:10:07,128 --> 00:10:08,782
I don't know, Carol.
207
00:10:08,869 --> 00:10:11,045
Something bothers me
about Luanne.
208
00:10:11,132 --> 00:10:12,873
Oh, come on, Frank,
you're just a little upset
209
00:10:12,960 --> 00:10:14,701
'cause you think
she's too young for your dad.
210
00:10:14,788 --> 00:10:16,746
No. No, no, no, that's not it.
211
00:10:16,833 --> 00:10:18,443
Listen, I think
it's great he hooked up
212
00:10:18,530 --> 00:10:20,489
with a girl half his age.
213
00:10:20,576 --> 00:10:22,360
In fact, I almost envy him.
214
00:10:22,447 --> 00:10:25,146
- Excuse me?
- Yeah, but I don't.
215
00:10:25,233 --> 00:10:27,714
I-I-I don't because I've got
something better.
216
00:10:27,801 --> 00:10:31,500
- You.
- Yeah. Nice save, Frank.
217
00:10:31,587 --> 00:10:32,806
Yeah, I thought so.
218
00:10:32,893 --> 00:10:33,807
Ooh!
219
00:10:35,373 --> 00:10:36,766
I know what it is.
220
00:10:36,853 --> 00:10:39,595
I have seen Luanne
somewhere before.
221
00:10:39,682 --> 00:10:40,727
Excuse me.
222
00:10:40,814 --> 00:10:42,076
I feel terrible
sitting out there
223
00:10:42,163 --> 00:10:43,730
while you two
are doing all the work.
224
00:10:43,817 --> 00:10:45,775
- Can I help?
- Uh, sure.
225
00:10:45,862 --> 00:10:47,472
Why don't you take that plate
of cookies in the living room
226
00:10:47,559 --> 00:10:48,517
and we'll be right in
with the coffee.
227
00:10:48,604 --> 00:10:49,561
Oh!
228
00:10:52,477 --> 00:10:53,478
[gasps]
229
00:11:01,312 --> 00:11:03,053
Oh, boy.
230
00:11:03,140 --> 00:11:05,665
Frank, she's gonna be your mom.
231
00:11:07,405 --> 00:11:09,930
No, no, no, honey.
I mean, oh, boy!
232
00:11:10,017 --> 00:11:12,062
I remember where I saw
Luanne before.
233
00:11:12,149 --> 00:11:13,455
It was last year
234
00:11:13,542 --> 00:11:16,110
at Bob Hackett's
bachelor's party.
235
00:11:16,197 --> 00:11:19,287
Oh, what was she doing at
Bob Hackett's bachelor party?
236
00:11:19,374 --> 00:11:20,462
[humming]
237
00:11:20,549 --> 00:11:22,246
♪ Rum pum ra rum ♪
238
00:11:22,333 --> 00:11:23,770
♪ Pum pa rum pum ba ♪♪
239
00:11:23,857 --> 00:11:25,380
[gibbering]
240
00:11:29,210 --> 00:11:30,646
She was the girl
241
00:11:30,733 --> 00:11:34,171
who jumped out
of the cake wearing...cake.
242
00:11:35,912 --> 00:11:37,435
Well, this is crazy, Frank.
243
00:11:37,522 --> 00:11:39,437
She can't be a, a..
244
00:11:39,524 --> 00:11:42,353
A stripper? Oh, yeah. Well,
there is one way to find out.
245
00:11:42,440 --> 00:11:45,313
The girl at that party
had the weirdest laugh.
246
00:11:45,400 --> 00:11:46,488
It was a..
247
00:11:46,575 --> 00:11:49,186
[wheezing laugh]
248
00:11:49,273 --> 00:11:51,493
Like that.
249
00:11:51,580 --> 00:11:53,713
Oh, come on, Frank,
nobody laughs like that.
250
00:11:53,800 --> 00:11:55,540
Yeah, well, I'll prove it.
I'll make her laugh.
251
00:11:55,627 --> 00:11:57,107
How?
252
00:11:57,194 --> 00:11:59,283
Just gonna rely
on the old Lambert wit.
253
00:12:00,937 --> 00:12:02,678
This could take all night.
254
00:12:11,818 --> 00:12:13,123
[chuckles]
Well..
255
00:12:13,210 --> 00:12:15,169
Here we go.
I got coffee, Luanne.
256
00:12:15,256 --> 00:12:18,128
You want, uh,
leaded or unleaded?
257
00:12:18,215 --> 00:12:21,088
[guffaws]
258
00:12:24,482 --> 00:12:25,701
Oh, golly.
259
00:12:27,572 --> 00:12:29,096
He means regular or decaf.
260
00:12:29,183 --> 00:12:31,054
- Oh, decaf.
- Oh.
261
00:12:31,141 --> 00:12:33,013
Carol, you have
raised yourself
262
00:12:33,100 --> 00:12:35,363
one heck of a nice family.
263
00:12:35,450 --> 00:12:36,756
Just don't let
Frank mess it up.
264
00:12:37,974 --> 00:12:40,629
[guffaws]
265
00:12:40,716 --> 00:12:42,239
Carol, these cookies
are delicious.
266
00:12:42,326 --> 00:12:43,806
- Are they home-made?
- They sure are.
267
00:12:43,893 --> 00:12:44,807
At least that's what
they told me
268
00:12:44,894 --> 00:12:46,374
at the bakery this morning.
269
00:12:46,461 --> 00:12:49,377
[wheezing laugh]
270
00:12:54,730 --> 00:12:57,472
[instrumental music]
271
00:13:01,737 --> 00:13:03,652
[Bill]
'Thanks a lot for dinner.'
272
00:13:03,739 --> 00:13:05,654
Oh-oh, looks like it was so good
273
00:13:05,741 --> 00:13:08,048
that Frank decided
to save some for later.
274
00:13:08,135 --> 00:13:09,092
Whoop! Gotcha.
275
00:13:09,179 --> 00:13:11,268
[wheezing laugh]
276
00:13:12,661 --> 00:13:14,837
Hasn't she got the cutest laugh?
277
00:13:14,924 --> 00:13:16,752
You guys are so much fun.
278
00:13:16,839 --> 00:13:18,275
I'm really gonna enjoy
being a part of this family.
279
00:13:18,362 --> 00:13:19,668
[chuckles]
280
00:13:19,755 --> 00:13:21,539
Well, we're gonna
enjoy having you.
281
00:13:21,626 --> 00:13:23,541
[wheezing laugh]
282
00:13:24,847 --> 00:13:26,762
You lying stripper.
283
00:13:29,765 --> 00:13:31,288
- Frank.
- Oh, honey.
284
00:13:31,375 --> 00:13:33,595
Can you believe that?
She lied about everything.
285
00:13:33,682 --> 00:13:36,598
I bet you she is
no dental hygienist either.
286
00:13:36,685 --> 00:13:38,861
Oh, somebody's gotta
sit my dad down
287
00:13:38,948 --> 00:13:41,777
and tell him
the cold, hard truth.
288
00:13:41,864 --> 00:13:44,127
Yeah, well, Frank, there's only
one person who can do that.
289
00:13:44,214 --> 00:13:45,912
Yeah, yeah.
290
00:13:45,999 --> 00:13:47,870
I'll call my brother
in Florida.
291
00:13:49,959 --> 00:13:51,265
Frank, I meant you.
292
00:13:51,352 --> 00:13:54,485
Oh, no, no, no,
I-I can't talk to him.
293
00:13:54,572 --> 00:13:57,053
I mean, my dad and I,
we can talk about sports
294
00:13:57,140 --> 00:13:58,968
and huntin' and snow tires
295
00:13:59,055 --> 00:14:00,752
but never anything personal.
296
00:14:00,840 --> 00:14:02,145
But, Frank,
if your father marries
297
00:14:02,232 --> 00:14:03,538
this woman,
it could ruin his life.
298
00:14:03,625 --> 00:14:05,279
I mean, who knows
what else she's lied about.
299
00:14:05,366 --> 00:14:07,629
- You've gotta talk to to him.
- Carol, I can't.
300
00:14:09,065 --> 00:14:11,502
Fine, don't talk to him.
301
00:14:11,589 --> 00:14:13,722
Let him marry Luanne.
302
00:14:13,809 --> 00:14:15,115
At least J.T. will be happy.
303
00:14:16,681 --> 00:14:18,248
We'll give him
a 16th birthday party
304
00:14:18,335 --> 00:14:20,468
he'll never forget.
305
00:14:20,555 --> 00:14:23,297
[instrumental music]
306
00:14:28,868 --> 00:14:31,261
Here she comes.
Now, go with me on this.
307
00:14:31,348 --> 00:14:33,829
I had to tell a few white lies
to get you this date.
308
00:14:35,657 --> 00:14:37,354
Lies? What lies?
309
00:14:38,355 --> 00:14:40,531
I told her you were smart.
310
00:14:40,618 --> 00:14:42,098
Well, if I told her
what an idiot you are
311
00:14:42,185 --> 00:14:43,404
you think she'd be
meeting you at all?
312
00:14:47,669 --> 00:14:49,149
- Tina, hi.
- Hi, Dana.
313
00:14:49,236 --> 00:14:50,454
This is J.T.
314
00:14:50,541 --> 00:14:52,892
Hi, Dana's told me
a lot about you.
315
00:14:52,979 --> 00:14:54,371
You know, I'm very interested
in hearing about
316
00:14:54,458 --> 00:14:56,939
the summer you spent working
with the apes in Africa.
317
00:15:01,552 --> 00:15:04,904
That's kind of a sensitive
subject right now.
318
00:15:04,991 --> 00:15:08,559
J.T. just found out
that his favorite chimp, Bingo
319
00:15:08,646 --> 00:15:10,910
was caught
in a wildebeest stampede.
320
00:15:13,782 --> 00:15:15,958
Oh, I'm so sorry.
321
00:15:17,568 --> 00:15:19,440
Hey, it's just another monkey.
322
00:15:27,448 --> 00:15:29,363
Well, I've got
some shoppin' to do.
323
00:15:29,450 --> 00:15:31,452
- I'll see you guys later, huh?
- Bye.
324
00:15:32,975 --> 00:15:34,977
So, Tina, what do you wanna do?
325
00:15:35,064 --> 00:15:37,197
Well, I was thinking
we can go to the art museum.
326
00:15:37,284 --> 00:15:39,416
They just opened an exhibition
of impressionists.
327
00:15:39,503 --> 00:15:41,636
Oh, that'd be great.
I love impressionists.
328
00:15:41,723 --> 00:15:43,333
You know, I do
a pretty fair Stallone.
329
00:15:43,420 --> 00:15:45,031
[imitating Stallone]
Hey, yo, Tina.
330
00:15:53,604 --> 00:15:55,693
[indistinct TV chatter]
331
00:15:55,780 --> 00:15:57,391
No, no, don't take that shot.
332
00:15:57,478 --> 00:15:59,175
Three pointer, yeah.
333
00:16:00,611 --> 00:16:02,352
Hey, guys, how is the game?
334
00:16:02,439 --> 00:16:04,311
Just started, honey.
335
00:16:04,398 --> 00:16:05,399
[whispering]
Talk to him.
336
00:16:05,486 --> 00:16:06,487
[indistinct TV chatter]
337
00:16:06,574 --> 00:16:07,923
Oh, no, Turner.
338
00:16:08,010 --> 00:16:09,098
Did you see what he did,
Frankie?
339
00:16:09,185 --> 00:16:10,621
He stripped the guy of the ball.
340
00:16:10,708 --> 00:16:12,101
Oh, stripping.
341
00:16:15,191 --> 00:16:17,237
Is that number 23
a good stripper?
342
00:16:17,324 --> 00:16:19,761
Carol, honey,
we're watching the game.
343
00:16:19,848 --> 00:16:20,892
I know, I know, but I..
344
00:16:20,980 --> 00:16:22,068
[indistinct muttering]
345
00:16:22,155 --> 00:16:23,243
Just talk to him.
346
00:16:27,943 --> 00:16:29,727
Uh..
347
00:16:29,814 --> 00:16:31,729
Uh, uh, d-dad,
can I talk to you?
348
00:16:31,816 --> 00:16:33,253
Sure, son.
349
00:16:33,340 --> 00:16:35,081
The Bucks just took timeout.
We got two minutes.
350
00:16:35,168 --> 00:16:37,257
What's on your mind?
351
00:16:37,344 --> 00:16:39,781
Uh, it's about Luanne.
352
00:16:39,868 --> 00:16:41,130
[chuckles]
353
00:16:41,217 --> 00:16:44,003
Oh, she is certainly something,
isn't she?
354
00:16:44,090 --> 00:16:45,787
The more you see of her,
the more you like her.
355
00:16:45,874 --> 00:16:47,528
Oh, you got that right.
356
00:16:49,965 --> 00:16:52,228
Alright, listen, dad,
a-about a year ago
357
00:16:52,315 --> 00:16:54,100
I went to a bachelor party.
358
00:16:54,187 --> 00:16:56,537
You know, one of those things
where a bunch of guys act silly
359
00:16:56,624 --> 00:16:59,279
and half-naked girl
jumps out of a cake.
360
00:16:59,366 --> 00:17:00,976
[chuckles]
361
00:17:01,063 --> 00:17:03,935
Well, what I'm trying
to say is, um..
362
00:17:04,023 --> 00:17:06,503
...that half-naked girl..
363
00:17:06,590 --> 00:17:07,591
...was Luanne.
364
00:17:08,897 --> 00:17:10,159
Luanne.
365
00:17:10,246 --> 00:17:12,379
Oh, dad, I'm positive
it was her.
366
00:17:12,466 --> 00:17:14,990
It was the same eyes,
the same laugh
367
00:17:15,077 --> 00:17:17,601
the same body language.
368
00:17:19,081 --> 00:17:20,387
It was Luanne.
369
00:17:24,086 --> 00:17:26,697
I-I think I see
what's going on here.
370
00:17:26,784 --> 00:17:29,439
You can't handle me marrying
a younger woman.
371
00:17:29,526 --> 00:17:32,051
Dad, that's not it.
She lied to you.
372
00:17:32,138 --> 00:17:33,748
Who knows what else
she not telling you?
373
00:17:33,835 --> 00:17:35,576
And let's face it, you don't
know very much about her.
374
00:17:35,663 --> 00:17:37,099
I'm not gonna sit here
and listen to you
375
00:17:37,186 --> 00:17:39,275
make up wild stories
about my future wife.
376
00:17:39,362 --> 00:17:40,668
I just didn't
want you to get hurt.
377
00:17:40,755 --> 00:17:42,235
It's a little late
for that, son.
378
00:17:42,322 --> 00:17:43,627
Oh! Come on, dad. Wait.
379
00:17:43,714 --> 00:17:46,630
Now, listen!
You just live your life.
380
00:17:46,717 --> 00:17:48,589
And let me live mine!
381
00:17:48,676 --> 00:17:50,112
[door slams]
382
00:17:50,199 --> 00:17:53,072
[mellow music]
383
00:18:00,905 --> 00:18:02,124
Hey, J.T.
384
00:18:03,604 --> 00:18:05,736
How was your date
with Tina Gordon?
385
00:18:05,823 --> 00:18:07,825
Tina Gordon?
386
00:18:07,912 --> 00:18:09,827
How did you ever
land a date with her?
387
00:18:09,914 --> 00:18:13,657
I sold my soul to the devil,
and her name is Dana.
388
00:18:13,744 --> 00:18:15,877
Dana fixed him up.
389
00:18:15,964 --> 00:18:18,749
I can't believe
you sold out for a dame.
390
00:18:22,666 --> 00:18:25,234
J.T., so how did your date go?
391
00:18:25,321 --> 00:18:28,759
Next to moving in here, it was
the worst experience of my life.
392
00:18:28,846 --> 00:18:31,980
Tina was stuck-up,
conceited, pig-headed snob.
393
00:18:32,067 --> 00:18:35,114
It was like dating
a better-looking version of you.
394
00:18:37,768 --> 00:18:40,336
So Tina,
who's a straight A student
395
00:18:40,423 --> 00:18:42,686
and you,
who has the IQ of a cabbage
396
00:18:42,773 --> 00:18:44,775
didn't get along?
397
00:18:44,862 --> 00:18:46,734
Gasp. What a shock!
398
00:18:48,344 --> 00:18:50,868
[chuckles]
Oh, you got him again, Dana.
399
00:18:52,000 --> 00:18:53,741
Okay, you won this time.
400
00:18:55,351 --> 00:18:57,614
But, to show you
there's no hard feelings
401
00:18:57,701 --> 00:18:59,573
I still picked up
your dinner for you.
402
00:18:59,660 --> 00:19:02,402
Spaghetti and meatballs.
403
00:19:02,489 --> 00:19:06,014
J.T., you are a bigger man
than I thought.
404
00:19:06,101 --> 00:19:07,581
No, I'm not.
405
00:19:07,668 --> 00:19:09,365
[screams]
406
00:19:15,023 --> 00:19:17,939
[instrumental music]
407
00:19:27,035 --> 00:19:28,602
Alright, Frank, why don't you
408
00:19:28,689 --> 00:19:30,299
just call the hotel
and talk to your dad?
409
00:19:30,386 --> 00:19:31,648
Well, let me see.
410
00:19:31,735 --> 00:19:33,868
The last time
I followed your advice
411
00:19:33,955 --> 00:19:34,956
he walked out on me.
412
00:19:35,043 --> 00:19:36,827
Maybe this time,
he'll disown me.
413
00:19:36,914 --> 00:19:37,872
[doorbell rings]
414
00:19:39,395 --> 00:19:40,483
I'll get it.
415
00:19:45,314 --> 00:19:47,316
Frank.
416
00:19:47,403 --> 00:19:49,666
Hi, Bill, come on in.
417
00:19:49,753 --> 00:19:50,711
Thank you.
418
00:19:52,495 --> 00:19:53,801
So, would you like a cup
of coffee or something?
419
00:19:53,888 --> 00:19:55,542
No, thanks, Carol.
Thanks, just the same.
420
00:19:57,196 --> 00:19:59,241
Well, great.
421
00:19:59,328 --> 00:20:01,330
Yeah, I'll just be
in the kitchen..
422
00:20:01,417 --> 00:20:02,810
...not getting coffee.
423
00:20:04,855 --> 00:20:06,335
Sit down. Please.
424
00:20:11,035 --> 00:20:13,168
- Listen, son, there's..
- Listen, dad, I really..
425
00:20:13,255 --> 00:20:14,430
Alright, you go first.
426
00:20:14,517 --> 00:20:17,216
Uh, no. No, no, you-you go.
427
00:20:17,303 --> 00:20:18,913
[sighs]
428
00:20:19,000 --> 00:20:22,786
Listen, I owe you an apology.
429
00:20:22,873 --> 00:20:24,484
The other night
after I'd left here
430
00:20:24,571 --> 00:20:26,877
and...cooled down a bit
431
00:20:26,964 --> 00:20:29,271
I, I asked Luanne
432
00:20:29,358 --> 00:20:31,665
if what you said was true.
433
00:20:31,752 --> 00:20:33,971
She said it was.
434
00:20:34,058 --> 00:20:36,365
- I'm sorry, dad.
- Oh, no, don't be sorry.
435
00:20:36,452 --> 00:20:38,367
Glad I found out.
436
00:20:38,454 --> 00:20:40,064
Did she say why she lied to you?
437
00:20:41,327 --> 00:20:43,938
Well, she said when we first met
438
00:20:44,025 --> 00:20:45,331
she didn't think
it was all that important.
439
00:20:45,418 --> 00:20:48,899
And then,
once we got serious, she..
440
00:20:51,032 --> 00:20:53,687
She was afraid of losing me.
441
00:20:53,774 --> 00:20:56,472
I know how disappointed
you must be.
442
00:20:56,559 --> 00:20:58,300
Depends on how you look at it,
I guess.
443
00:20:59,736 --> 00:21:01,260
Finding out your fiance
is an ex-stripper
444
00:21:01,347 --> 00:21:03,087
ain't all that bad, you know?
445
00:21:06,265 --> 00:21:08,005
An ex-stripper?
446
00:21:08,092 --> 00:21:10,617
Yeah, all of that's
behind her now.
447
00:21:10,704 --> 00:21:11,661
She's turning her
whole life around.
448
00:21:11,748 --> 00:21:14,055
She's even going back to school.
449
00:21:14,142 --> 00:21:17,624
So, uh, what happens now?
450
00:21:17,711 --> 00:21:19,539
Well..
451
00:21:19,626 --> 00:21:21,932
...gonna put a hold
on this marriage thing
452
00:21:22,019 --> 00:21:23,891
until we get to know
each other a little better.
453
00:21:23,978 --> 00:21:25,327
- I think that's a good idea.
- Yeah.
454
00:21:25,414 --> 00:21:27,373
Thought that.
455
00:21:27,460 --> 00:21:29,636
[sighs]
456
00:21:29,723 --> 00:21:31,420
But, you know, the one thing
that still bothers me
457
00:21:31,507 --> 00:21:32,987
about all this..
458
00:21:35,337 --> 00:21:37,208
I didn't believe you, son.
I'm sorry.
459
00:21:38,819 --> 00:21:40,864
Oh, that's alright.
460
00:21:40,951 --> 00:21:42,692
You know, when I was young
and you used to tell me
461
00:21:42,779 --> 00:21:44,738
all kinds of things,
I never believed you either.
462
00:21:44,825 --> 00:21:46,870
[both chuckle]
463
00:21:46,957 --> 00:21:49,090
Yeah, maybe we're just
getting even, huh?
464
00:21:49,177 --> 00:21:50,134
Yeah.
465
00:21:51,832 --> 00:21:54,138
[mellow music]
466
00:21:59,883 --> 00:22:01,624
Boy.
467
00:22:01,711 --> 00:22:03,583
This is the first time we ever
had a talk like this, huh?
468
00:22:03,670 --> 00:22:05,280
It was great.
469
00:22:05,367 --> 00:22:08,065
Maybe we should do it some more.
470
00:22:08,152 --> 00:22:09,110
Yeah.
471
00:22:14,333 --> 00:22:16,335
Yeah.
472
00:22:16,422 --> 00:22:18,119
Say, what time was that game on?
473
00:22:18,206 --> 00:22:20,251
- It's about ten minutes in.
- Oh, well, let's go for it.
474
00:22:20,339 --> 00:22:22,471
- Yeah.
- Oh, dad, you lost a button.
475
00:22:22,558 --> 00:22:24,343
- What?
- Oh, no!
476
00:22:25,605 --> 00:22:28,477
[instrumental music]
477
00:22:32,394 --> 00:22:35,092
[theme music]
32697
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