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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,702 --> 00:00:04,852 [theme music playing] 2 00:00:21,521 --> 00:00:23,257 [screams] 3 00:00:23,291 --> 00:00:25,260 [Poison Ivy] Gotcha! 4 00:00:25,294 --> 00:00:28,661 I'm not great at having people who are actually good to me in my life. 5 00:00:28,696 --> 00:00:31,045 Same. Most people are trash. 6 00:00:32,432 --> 00:00:34,701 Wouldn't it be messed up if I ate you right now? 7 00:00:34,734 --> 00:00:39,073 [both laughing] 8 00:00:39,106 --> 00:00:43,277 -[groans] -Ive! 9 00:00:43,310 --> 00:00:46,460 [Poison Ivy groaning] 10 00:00:49,350 --> 00:00:50,951 Ive, don't leave me. 11 00:00:50,984 --> 00:00:53,820 We still got so much ass-kicking to do. 12 00:00:53,853 --> 00:00:55,956 Harley... 13 00:00:55,990 --> 00:00:57,189 I can't. 14 00:01:05,099 --> 00:01:06,448 [sobbing] 15 00:01:10,203 --> 00:01:11,971 [Joker laughing] 16 00:01:11,971 --> 00:01:12,740 Oops! 17 00:01:12,740 --> 00:01:15,740 [laughing continues] 18 00:01:17,778 --> 00:01:20,748 [laughing continues] 19 00:01:20,781 --> 00:01:23,180 [laughing fades] 20 00:01:26,887 --> 00:01:31,091 Harley, uh, a few words? 21 00:01:31,125 --> 00:01:33,227 [stifled sobs] 22 00:01:33,260 --> 00:01:36,563 Let her grieve. I've prepared a little something. 23 00:01:36,596 --> 00:01:37,965 [clearing throat] 24 00:01:37,998 --> 00:01:39,667 -[Harley sobbing] -We have gathered today 25 00:01:39,700 --> 00:01:42,503 to pay respects to our beloved friend. 26 00:01:42,537 --> 00:01:45,439 Her death was not an empty sacrifice. 27 00:01:45,472 --> 00:01:48,575 And, of my friend, I will say just this. 28 00:01:48,609 --> 00:01:52,146 Of all the souls I have met on my journeys, 29 00:01:52,179 --> 00:01:54,581 hers was the most... 30 00:01:54,615 --> 00:01:56,450 -human. [sobs] -[Harley sobbing] 31 00:01:56,483 --> 00:01:58,918 Wow, that, uh... [sniffles] Wasn't awful. 32 00:01:58,953 --> 00:02:00,921 As apropos a speech now 33 00:02:00,954 --> 00:02:02,423 as when it was originally delivered 34 00:02:02,456 --> 00:02:05,959 by William Shatner's Captain James Tiberius Kirk 35 00:02:05,992 --> 00:02:08,895 in Star Trek II: Wrath of Khan. 36 00:02:08,929 --> 00:02:13,729 [Dr. Psycho] Mmm-hmm. All right. 37 00:02:14,735 --> 00:02:16,804 [Frank sobbing] 38 00:02:16,836 --> 00:02:20,074 Goodbye, my dear fiancee. 39 00:02:20,106 --> 00:02:22,356 [Frank wailing] 40 00:02:25,913 --> 00:02:27,647 Who's gonna water my roots? 41 00:02:27,681 --> 00:02:29,349 [sobbing] 42 00:02:29,383 --> 00:02:33,753 I don't trust any of these assholes. 43 00:02:33,753 --> 00:02:34,754 [Harley sobs] 44 00:02:34,754 --> 00:02:36,776 You'll be missed. 45 00:02:39,725 --> 00:02:41,975 [Harley crying] 46 00:02:50,771 --> 00:02:55,771 She's a doctor, damn it! Who chiseled this shit? 47 00:03:11,792 --> 00:03:15,295 [screaming] 48 00:03:15,329 --> 00:03:17,264 No, no, no. 49 00:03:17,298 --> 00:03:18,766 What're ya... What are you doin'? 50 00:03:18,800 --> 00:03:20,868 He doesn't want you to follow Ivy to the grave. 51 00:03:20,868 --> 00:03:24,038 So that's it? We're just supposed to sit here twiddling our thumbs? 52 00:03:24,072 --> 00:03:28,308 Well, unless you got some kind of actual plan, I say yes. 53 00:03:28,342 --> 00:03:30,344 Yes. I got one. 54 00:03:30,378 --> 00:03:33,881 Ooh, does it involve indiscriminate smashing of other people's property? 55 00:03:33,913 --> 00:03:35,181 -No. -Aw! 56 00:03:35,216 --> 00:03:37,286 When no one believed in me, Ivy did. 57 00:03:37,318 --> 00:03:40,420 She always wanted me to get rid of this asshole, so that's what I'm gonna do. 58 00:03:40,455 --> 00:03:41,822 Still not a plan. 59 00:03:41,854 --> 00:03:44,655 I'm workin' on one. 60 00:03:51,231 --> 00:03:52,633 Come on, come on. 61 00:03:52,667 --> 00:03:54,235 -Jim, what's wrong? -Nothing. 62 00:03:54,268 --> 00:03:55,637 My marriage is totally fine. 63 00:03:55,669 --> 00:03:57,504 [sighs] I mean the situation on the street. 64 00:03:57,538 --> 00:03:59,439 Oh, that's a shit show. 65 00:03:59,473 --> 00:04:01,408 Unlike my marriage, which is rock-solid. 66 00:04:01,408 --> 00:04:02,830 -Right. -[door opens] 67 00:04:02,830 --> 00:04:05,044 Ugh, what is the point of having an elevator if it doesn't work? 68 00:04:05,079 --> 00:04:06,379 Quinn, what are you doing here? 69 00:04:06,413 --> 00:04:08,250 I wanna take down Joker. 70 00:04:08,250 --> 00:04:10,183 I can't believe I'm saying this, but... we need to work together. 71 00:04:10,217 --> 00:04:11,384 I work alone. 72 00:04:11,419 --> 00:04:12,419 What about me? 73 00:04:12,453 --> 00:04:13,754 -Not now, Jim. -[groans] 74 00:04:13,788 --> 00:04:15,622 No one knows Joker better than you and me. 75 00:04:15,657 --> 00:04:18,593 [breathlessly] I've got a file on him. I'll be right back. 76 00:04:18,625 --> 00:04:20,461 Look, we put our heads together, we can beat him. 77 00:04:20,495 --> 00:04:22,629 And then you can go back to doing whatever it is you do. 78 00:04:22,663 --> 00:04:25,333 I'm not teaming up with you. You should be locked up in Arkham. 79 00:04:25,333 --> 00:04:28,035 Joker killed Ivy, took over Gotham, 80 00:04:28,067 --> 00:04:29,735 and cut off your bat nuts! 81 00:04:29,769 --> 00:04:31,538 -Hmm. -Help me! 82 00:04:31,538 --> 00:04:33,040 You're never gonna believe this. [panting] 83 00:04:33,040 --> 00:04:34,172 Found Joker's file, 84 00:04:34,172 --> 00:04:36,944 but he replaced it with one of those greeting cards that plays music. 85 00:04:36,976 --> 00:04:38,211 [music playing] 86 00:04:38,245 --> 00:04:41,115 What a tricky son of a so-and-so. 87 00:04:41,148 --> 00:04:43,117 -[laughs] -If I say yes to this, 88 00:04:43,149 --> 00:04:45,386 what do you bring to the table, Quinn? 89 00:04:45,418 --> 00:04:49,019 The thing he wants most. 90 00:04:51,891 --> 00:04:55,041 [mechanical whirring] 91 00:05:00,033 --> 00:05:02,584 [camera whirring] 92 00:05:06,406 --> 00:05:07,875 [Joker over speaker] Who is it? 93 00:05:07,908 --> 00:05:09,442 I've already donated. 94 00:05:09,476 --> 00:05:11,745 Oh, Harley. [laughs] 95 00:05:11,778 --> 00:05:13,747 To what do I owe the pleasure? 96 00:05:13,781 --> 00:05:17,250 Well, seein' as it's your birthday and all, I got you a gift. 97 00:05:17,283 --> 00:05:18,920 Oh, you shouldn't have. 98 00:05:18,952 --> 00:05:22,548 I mean, especially after what I did to Ivy. 99 00:05:22,548 --> 00:05:24,524 You must be very upset with me. 100 00:05:24,559 --> 00:05:28,596 Of course I'm referring to the "murdering her on purpose." 101 00:05:28,629 --> 00:05:31,365 Oh, I hate you more than you'll ever know. 102 00:05:31,399 --> 00:05:32,800 But I'm also practical. 103 00:05:32,834 --> 00:05:35,603 You won, and I wanna be on the winnin' side. 104 00:05:35,636 --> 00:05:39,372 Oh, Harley, how positively mature of you. 105 00:05:39,406 --> 00:05:40,942 I know, real growth. 106 00:05:40,975 --> 00:05:43,142 I thought maybe we could patch things up 107 00:05:43,177 --> 00:05:45,913 over a steamin' cup of... 108 00:05:45,946 --> 00:05:49,016 Batman. 109 00:05:49,050 --> 00:05:51,786 Oh, Harley, this... [laughs] This is amazing. 110 00:05:51,819 --> 00:05:53,821 For the man who has everything, 111 00:05:53,855 --> 00:05:58,059 you found the one thing I wanted and didn't have! 112 00:05:58,093 --> 00:06:00,360 [Clayface in sing-song voice] He's buying it! 113 00:06:00,394 --> 00:06:04,293 Just keep your mouth shut. 114 00:06:14,341 --> 00:06:18,879 Well, happy birthday to me! [laughing] 115 00:06:18,913 --> 00:06:20,817 Of course, no birthday's complete 116 00:06:20,850 --> 00:06:24,016 without my special birthday song. 117 00:06:24,050 --> 00:06:25,620 What do you say, Harls? 118 00:06:25,653 --> 00:06:28,021 For old time's sake? 119 00:06:28,055 --> 00:06:29,255 [clearing throat] 120 00:06:29,290 --> 00:06:30,891 To my puddin'. 121 00:06:30,925 --> 00:06:35,163 ♪ Happy birthday to you!♪ 122 00:06:35,196 --> 00:06:37,899 -♪ Happy birthday to you! ♪ -♪ Happy birthday... ♪ 123 00:06:37,932 --> 00:06:40,100 Would you look at this dumbass son of a bitch. 124 00:06:40,134 --> 00:06:42,370 Don't sing! 125 00:06:42,403 --> 00:06:46,339 -♪ Happy birthday... ♪ -♪ Happy birthday Clown prince of evil! ♪ 126 00:06:46,374 --> 00:06:51,173 ♪ Happy birthday to you!♪ 127 00:06:51,545 --> 00:06:55,295 ♪ And many more! ♪ 128 00:06:56,884 --> 00:06:59,754 Wait a minute. That's not Batman! 129 00:06:59,786 --> 00:07:03,237 Shit! Shit, shit, shit! 130 00:07:13,834 --> 00:07:17,237 God damn it! 131 00:07:17,271 --> 00:07:19,173 [beeps] 132 00:07:19,206 --> 00:07:21,040 [chuckles] 133 00:07:21,074 --> 00:07:22,942 [Joker laughing] 134 00:07:22,975 --> 00:07:24,545 Keep banging away. 135 00:07:24,579 --> 00:07:26,247 You'll never get away with this. 136 00:07:26,279 --> 00:07:28,314 Nighty night, Batman. 137 00:07:28,348 --> 00:07:31,218 [laughing] 138 00:07:31,252 --> 00:07:32,485 Grab them! 139 00:07:32,519 --> 00:07:35,956 [laughing] 140 00:07:35,988 --> 00:07:38,238 [all screaming] 141 00:07:43,630 --> 00:07:45,499 [Joker] That's right, Harley! 142 00:07:45,533 --> 00:07:49,583 Run away! [laughing] 143 00:08:03,817 --> 00:08:05,166 [screams] 144 00:08:15,194 --> 00:08:17,531 [screams] Make it stop! 145 00:08:17,564 --> 00:08:21,067 Oh, my God! 146 00:08:21,100 --> 00:08:22,470 [screaming] 147 00:08:22,502 --> 00:08:24,672 [Joker] Don't handi-crap your pants. [laughing] 148 00:08:24,704 --> 00:08:27,206 [Clayface exclaiming] 149 00:08:27,240 --> 00:08:29,677 [splutters] 150 00:08:29,709 --> 00:08:34,710 No, Nurse, I said to prick his boil! 151 00:08:37,618 --> 00:08:39,919 [police siren wailing] 152 00:08:39,952 --> 00:08:41,903 [gun cocking] 153 00:08:49,062 --> 00:08:53,533 [Joker's voice] Cuckoo! Cuckoo! Cuckoo! 154 00:08:53,567 --> 00:08:55,667 [Joker laughs] 155 00:09:03,043 --> 00:09:06,312 [Joker laughs] 156 00:09:06,346 --> 00:09:08,148 -Ugh! -[electricity crackling] 157 00:09:08,148 --> 00:09:09,149 Take that... 158 00:09:09,149 --> 00:09:10,917 -[Batman grunts] -And that. 159 00:09:10,951 --> 00:09:13,287 And that. 160 00:09:13,320 --> 00:09:14,488 Yawn! 161 00:09:14,488 --> 00:09:18,125 Who would've thought my 25th birthday month would be so blah. 162 00:09:18,158 --> 00:09:20,230 -Maybe I'm having a quarter-life crisis. -[cork popping] 163 00:09:20,263 --> 00:09:23,297 [screams] What the hell are you doing? 164 00:09:23,330 --> 00:09:24,731 Celebrating! 165 00:09:24,764 --> 00:09:27,768 Think of all you've accomplished in 38 years. 166 00:09:27,768 --> 00:09:31,072 I'm 25, and you know how I feel about champagne corks. 167 00:09:31,072 --> 00:09:32,472 That could've hit me in the eye. 168 00:09:32,505 --> 00:09:33,573 Sorry about that. 169 00:09:33,573 --> 00:09:34,841 So, what shall we do now, boss? 170 00:09:34,875 --> 00:09:36,378 Maybe we build a giant maze, yeah? 171 00:09:36,410 --> 00:09:39,980 Dose the people in it with fear toxin? [chuckling] 172 00:09:40,014 --> 00:09:42,551 [groans] You are so one note, bag head. 173 00:09:42,583 --> 00:09:46,653 [laughs] After Harley and I got disruptive, you know how we'd celebrate? 174 00:09:46,687 --> 00:09:47,988 Uh, fondue? 175 00:09:48,020 --> 00:09:49,823 "Fondue"? No! 176 00:09:49,856 --> 00:09:52,525 By getting more disruptive! 177 00:09:52,559 --> 00:09:54,360 Like kidnapping Gordon and eating sushi 178 00:09:54,394 --> 00:09:56,898 off his lumpy, naked body. 179 00:09:56,931 --> 00:09:59,299 [sighs] I was picking hair 180 00:09:59,332 --> 00:10:01,601 out of my teeth for weeks. 181 00:10:01,635 --> 00:10:03,004 And now I'm doing this, 182 00:10:03,037 --> 00:10:05,609 which should be tons of fun, but I'm bored. 183 00:10:05,643 --> 00:10:07,875 What is wrong with me? 184 00:10:07,908 --> 00:10:10,677 You're a sociopathic narcissist. [screams] 185 00:10:10,711 --> 00:10:12,879 It was rhetorical, asshole! 186 00:10:12,913 --> 00:10:15,448 And who do you think you are, a psychiatrist? 187 00:10:15,482 --> 00:10:17,951 Let's find out. 188 00:10:17,985 --> 00:10:20,053 -What? -Bloody hell! 189 00:10:20,087 --> 00:10:23,356 [stammers] It's billionaire playboy Bruce Wayne. 190 00:10:23,389 --> 00:10:25,125 [hysterically] No! 191 00:10:25,125 --> 00:10:26,125 [breathing heavily] 192 00:10:26,159 --> 00:10:28,461 Are you shitting me! 193 00:10:28,495 --> 00:10:30,197 What is wrong with you? 194 00:10:30,230 --> 00:10:34,001 Don't you think I would have done that had I wanted to? 195 00:10:34,034 --> 00:10:36,839 Half the fun of our relationship was the mystery! 196 00:10:36,871 --> 00:10:40,908 Now I know Batman is just some boring rich asshole with parental issues. 197 00:10:40,942 --> 00:10:42,476 That's really reductive. 198 00:10:42,510 --> 00:10:44,946 Thanks for ruining the funnest thing I had going. 199 00:10:44,979 --> 00:10:47,783 Now I don't even feel like torturing him. 200 00:10:47,816 --> 00:10:50,618 [stutters] Sorry, I thought it might be the kind of thing Harley would do. 201 00:10:50,650 --> 00:10:52,320 I don't care about Harley! 202 00:10:52,354 --> 00:10:55,057 [stammers] I'm sorry, look, I must've misread the situation 203 00:10:55,090 --> 00:10:58,458 when you kept saying her name and reminiscing about all your memories together. 204 00:10:58,491 --> 00:11:00,727 Over and over and over and-- 205 00:11:00,760 --> 00:11:02,410 [screaming] 206 00:11:06,000 --> 00:11:08,235 [groans] Not even that was fun. 207 00:11:08,269 --> 00:11:12,239 WayneTech promised an electric car by this year. 208 00:11:12,272 --> 00:11:13,573 I put a deposit down. 209 00:11:13,606 --> 00:11:17,312 Where's my goddamn electric car, Bruce? 210 00:11:17,345 --> 00:11:21,481 The guy at the flower shop said black roses don't exist in nature, 211 00:11:21,514 --> 00:11:23,317 so I had to dye these. 212 00:11:23,350 --> 00:11:26,721 Just wanted you to have a little bit of me in the ground with ya. 213 00:11:26,754 --> 00:11:29,724 Oh, Ive! I miss you so much! 214 00:11:29,756 --> 00:11:32,525 If you can hear me, just give me a sign. 215 00:11:32,559 --> 00:11:34,528 -Harley? -[exclaims] 216 00:11:34,562 --> 00:11:37,030 Hey there. I was just taking a little catnap back here on the ol' rock. 217 00:11:37,065 --> 00:11:38,566 [stammers] Are you living here? 218 00:11:38,566 --> 00:11:40,033 I don't know if I'd call this "living." 219 00:11:40,033 --> 00:11:41,601 You're damn right. I'm an indoor plant. 220 00:11:41,634 --> 00:11:43,738 I'm supposed to get indirect sunlight. 221 00:11:43,770 --> 00:11:46,740 I just hate the thought of leaving Ivy alone. 222 00:11:46,774 --> 00:11:48,475 Hey, what... Why aren't you hiding? 223 00:11:48,509 --> 00:11:51,846 Bounty's up to... Oh, man! That's a lot of zeros. 224 00:11:51,879 --> 00:11:53,514 But why does he want your ass alive? 225 00:11:53,548 --> 00:11:56,750 It's obvi. To make her watch her crew get executed. 226 00:11:56,783 --> 00:11:58,044 Wait, what? 227 00:11:58,044 --> 00:12:01,089 Yeah. He's gonna execute them and then after, he's throwing an '80s party. 228 00:12:01,121 --> 00:12:03,390 You don't have to dress up but it's strongly suggested. 229 00:12:03,424 --> 00:12:06,760 God, so many iconic '80s looks to choose from. 230 00:12:06,793 --> 00:12:08,198 I wanna go "Thriller" 231 00:12:08,198 --> 00:12:11,164 but I don't wanna be the third "Thriller" in line for the potato salad. You feel me? 232 00:12:11,164 --> 00:12:13,033 [Harley] They're doing it at sundown tonight! 233 00:12:13,067 --> 00:12:14,735 Oh. I'm not gonna let this happen. 234 00:12:14,769 --> 00:12:17,238 Uh, how are you gonna stop Joker by yourself 235 00:12:17,272 --> 00:12:19,005 when you couldn't even do it with Batman? 236 00:12:19,039 --> 00:12:21,042 I don't know. I need a minute to think. 237 00:12:21,075 --> 00:12:24,644 -One Mississippi, two Mississippi... -[Kite Man humming] 238 00:12:24,677 --> 00:12:27,447 -...three Mississippi... -Can you... 239 00:12:27,480 --> 00:12:28,950 Can you not be here right now? 240 00:12:28,982 --> 00:12:32,086 Like, you want me to go over by that tree, or... 241 00:12:32,120 --> 00:12:35,255 You know, I know I said I don't live here, but I sort of do. 242 00:12:35,289 --> 00:12:40,289 Just give me a sec with Ive, okay? 243 00:12:40,827 --> 00:12:44,798 Ive, what I'm gonna do may be a suicide mission. 244 00:12:44,831 --> 00:12:46,134 If I don't see you back here, 245 00:12:46,167 --> 00:12:50,671 maybe I'll see you on the flip side. 246 00:12:50,703 --> 00:12:55,703 [exhales] All right, here goes nothing. 247 00:13:02,149 --> 00:13:05,600 [Joker imitating alarm] 248 00:13:07,254 --> 00:13:08,422 Hey! 249 00:13:08,455 --> 00:13:10,024 Oh, hey, Harley. 250 00:13:10,057 --> 00:13:14,128 I was just... [clears throat] Finishing Infinite Jest. 251 00:13:14,162 --> 00:13:15,629 Are you familiar with it? 252 00:13:15,663 --> 00:13:17,063 Spine looks pretty intact. 253 00:13:17,097 --> 00:13:19,433 [stutters] Well, I have a digital copy, too. 254 00:13:19,466 --> 00:13:22,537 Anyway, are you here for the big execution? 255 00:13:22,571 --> 00:13:24,538 There ain't gonna be an execution. 256 00:13:24,572 --> 00:13:28,043 Flyers say there is. Right before the live '80s cover band. 257 00:13:28,076 --> 00:13:30,977 Their version of "Sweet Child O' Mine" is... [laughs] 258 00:13:31,011 --> 00:13:33,014 -It's okay. -Release my friends. 259 00:13:33,014 --> 00:13:37,216 Or what? I have a whole army inside this sick-ass tower. 260 00:13:37,250 --> 00:13:38,318 [laughing] 261 00:13:38,352 --> 00:13:40,855 What leg do you have to stand on? 262 00:13:40,888 --> 00:13:42,822 It seems like you really want me alive, 263 00:13:42,856 --> 00:13:44,892 so, if you don't do what I say... 264 00:13:44,926 --> 00:13:49,397 I'm gone. 265 00:13:49,431 --> 00:13:54,431 -[elevator music playing] -[floor indicator beeping] 266 00:13:54,500 --> 00:13:55,735 [elevator dings] 267 00:13:55,769 --> 00:13:57,404 Welcome to my penthouse. 268 00:13:57,438 --> 00:13:59,774 [laughs] It's got all the amenities. 269 00:13:59,807 --> 00:14:02,277 Central air, 360-degree views, 270 00:14:02,309 --> 00:14:04,611 and a couple of horny tigers. 271 00:14:04,644 --> 00:14:06,214 [roaring] 272 00:14:06,214 --> 00:14:08,816 What the hell do you want from me? Where's my crew? 273 00:14:08,849 --> 00:14:10,985 [chuckling] 274 00:14:11,018 --> 00:14:14,889 I want you to put this on. 275 00:14:14,922 --> 00:14:18,359 [laughing] 276 00:14:18,393 --> 00:14:22,195 Come on, remember how much fun you had in that costume? 277 00:14:22,195 --> 00:14:23,130 No. 278 00:14:23,130 --> 00:14:24,798 I didn't have fun. 279 00:14:24,798 --> 00:14:26,700 You were the one having fun. 280 00:14:26,700 --> 00:14:28,470 It wasn't till I got away from you 281 00:14:28,470 --> 00:14:32,206 that I realized how deeply un- fun being with you was. 282 00:14:32,240 --> 00:14:35,476 So I would rather blow myself up and take you with me 283 00:14:35,509 --> 00:14:39,279 than go back to being your sidekick and wearing that fuckin' costume! 284 00:14:39,313 --> 00:14:42,182 Well, you could. Certainly an option. 285 00:14:42,216 --> 00:14:44,985 Only fly in the ointment is if you blow yourself up, 286 00:14:45,019 --> 00:14:47,520 -you'll take your crew with you. -[beeps, whirs] 287 00:14:47,553 --> 00:14:50,557 [Joker laughing] 288 00:14:50,591 --> 00:14:54,861 So, how about you make this easy and put... 289 00:14:54,894 --> 00:14:56,897 the outfit... 290 00:14:56,931 --> 00:14:58,533 on. 291 00:14:58,566 --> 00:14:59,933 -[Clayface, King Shark, Sy] Don't do it. -Do it. 292 00:14:59,966 --> 00:15:02,802 So, I put this on, you let them go? 293 00:15:02,836 --> 00:15:06,472 And if you don't... [laughing] 294 00:15:06,506 --> 00:15:08,307 I kill them. 295 00:15:13,080 --> 00:15:15,816 [chuckles] Oh, there she is! 296 00:15:15,850 --> 00:15:17,820 Harley Quinn original recipe. 297 00:15:17,854 --> 00:15:20,754 Why'd you have to go and mess with a classic? 298 00:15:20,788 --> 00:15:23,124 Are you gonna let my crew go, or what? 299 00:15:23,157 --> 00:15:24,750 I'm a man of my word. 300 00:15:24,750 --> 00:15:25,750 Buh-bye. 301 00:15:25,759 --> 00:15:26,994 [crew screaming] 302 00:15:27,028 --> 00:15:29,596 [distant screams continue] 303 00:15:29,629 --> 00:15:30,931 [groans] 304 00:15:30,965 --> 00:15:35,965 She gave her life so that we may live. 305 00:15:36,136 --> 00:15:40,375 [tearfully] Goodbye, Harley. 306 00:15:40,408 --> 00:15:43,510 Okay, I'm in the costume. So what's the plan? 307 00:15:43,544 --> 00:15:45,547 Want me to make you a chocolate cake, 308 00:15:45,580 --> 00:15:49,384 -put on Legally Blonde, call you "puddin'"? -[laughing] 309 00:15:49,417 --> 00:15:51,653 Harley, I've got the city by the balls. 310 00:15:51,686 --> 00:15:53,823 The cops are mine. Batman's tied up and gagged. 311 00:15:53,856 --> 00:15:57,591 I have everything a man could want. 312 00:15:57,624 --> 00:15:58,926 But I'm not happy. 313 00:15:58,958 --> 00:16:00,528 And do you know why? 314 00:16:00,562 --> 00:16:03,464 Because you're a textbook sociopathic narcissist 315 00:16:03,498 --> 00:16:07,100 with a chemical imbalance in your parasympathetic nervous system? 316 00:16:07,134 --> 00:16:09,035 Hey, that's what Batman said. 317 00:16:09,070 --> 00:16:11,307 Hey, Batman, she said the thing you said. 318 00:16:11,341 --> 00:16:14,743 Anyway, no. The reason I wasn't happy 319 00:16:14,775 --> 00:16:17,110 was because we weren't together. 320 00:16:17,144 --> 00:16:20,114 It wasn't until I got everything... 321 00:16:20,147 --> 00:16:22,615 that I realized it means nothing 322 00:16:22,649 --> 00:16:24,551 without you by my side. 323 00:16:24,585 --> 00:16:25,854 Really? 324 00:16:25,854 --> 00:16:28,288 Harley, you're the missing piece to my happiness. 325 00:16:28,322 --> 00:16:30,191 I knew you'd be back. 326 00:16:30,224 --> 00:16:33,860 I guess I could never stay away from my puddin'. 327 00:16:33,894 --> 00:16:35,697 -[stabbing] -[both grunting] 328 00:16:35,730 --> 00:16:39,600 You were always so unoriginal, stealing my ideas. 329 00:16:39,633 --> 00:16:43,533 Fuck you! This is for Ivy. 330 00:16:46,572 --> 00:16:48,142 Ha! 331 00:16:48,176 --> 00:16:50,426 [both grunting] 332 00:16:54,148 --> 00:16:56,917 [Joker laughs] 333 00:16:56,951 --> 00:16:58,301 [roaring] 334 00:17:08,695 --> 00:17:09,797 [yelping] 335 00:17:09,829 --> 00:17:12,532 [Joker laughing] 336 00:17:12,566 --> 00:17:14,501 [screaming] 337 00:17:14,536 --> 00:17:16,804 Did you really think I was gonna believe that bullshit 338 00:17:16,836 --> 00:17:19,105 about me being the missing piece? 339 00:17:19,140 --> 00:17:22,343 [chuckles] But that was all true! 340 00:17:22,376 --> 00:17:25,346 You see, I only have one weakness. You. 341 00:17:25,346 --> 00:17:29,083 And when you're the most powerful man in the world, there's no room for weakness. 342 00:17:29,115 --> 00:17:30,984 And so, my only option 343 00:17:31,018 --> 00:17:33,721 is to... [chuckling] Get rid of you. 344 00:17:33,753 --> 00:17:36,057 Then do it. Kill me! 345 00:17:36,089 --> 00:17:39,926 [laughs] Do you take me for a basic bitch? 346 00:17:39,960 --> 00:17:41,528 If I were I to kill you, 347 00:17:41,563 --> 00:17:45,266 you'd live on forever, an emotional martyr in my soul. 348 00:17:45,298 --> 00:17:49,237 So I'm going to erase you from existence. 349 00:17:49,269 --> 00:17:52,772 Pick her up. Follow me. 350 00:17:52,806 --> 00:17:55,875 [Harley grunts] 351 00:17:55,910 --> 00:17:58,511 [bubbling] 352 00:17:58,511 --> 00:17:59,513 [gasps, strains] 353 00:17:59,547 --> 00:18:01,648 I made the mistake of creating you, 354 00:18:01,682 --> 00:18:03,651 and now I'm going to undo that mistake. 355 00:18:03,684 --> 00:18:08,055 This acid will erase all that makes you Harley Quinn. 356 00:18:08,088 --> 00:18:11,224 You'll be a nobody. A blank canvas. 357 00:18:11,259 --> 00:18:14,493 A stranger on the streets. [chuckling] 358 00:18:14,528 --> 00:18:15,561 Normal. 359 00:18:15,596 --> 00:18:16,865 Don't do this. 360 00:18:16,897 --> 00:18:19,034 If you wanna kill me, kill me, but don't do this! 361 00:18:19,034 --> 00:18:24,034 Should've thought of that before you made me fall in love with you. 362 00:18:28,241 --> 00:18:30,044 [Joker] It's time. But don't worry, 363 00:18:30,076 --> 00:18:32,046 you won't remember a thing. 364 00:18:32,078 --> 00:18:34,513 [gasps softly] 365 00:18:34,548 --> 00:18:36,049 Let me jump. 366 00:18:36,083 --> 00:18:38,885 Let this last act of Harley Quinn be my own. 367 00:18:38,919 --> 00:18:40,454 You owe me at least that. 368 00:18:40,488 --> 00:18:44,238 [chuckles] Sure. Go nuts. 369 00:18:50,163 --> 00:18:52,365 Goodbye, Harley Quinn. 370 00:18:52,400 --> 00:18:53,734 [bubbling continues] 371 00:18:53,768 --> 00:18:55,638 Wait a minute. Did anyone hear a splash? 372 00:18:55,672 --> 00:18:59,606 I've fallen in acid enough times to know that there should be a splash. 373 00:18:59,641 --> 00:19:01,842 You're right about that, puddin'. 374 00:19:01,875 --> 00:19:03,144 How did you... 375 00:19:03,176 --> 00:19:05,612 Wait. Where are those vines coming from? 376 00:19:05,645 --> 00:19:06,996 Oh, fuck. 377 00:19:22,163 --> 00:19:25,333 I knew I should've harpooned you in the head! 378 00:19:25,333 --> 00:19:26,701 One in the head, one in the heart. 379 00:19:26,701 --> 00:19:29,135 It's Harpooning 101. 380 00:19:29,170 --> 00:19:32,105 [both scream] 381 00:19:32,138 --> 00:19:34,307 -Guess who's next? -[grunts] 382 00:19:34,342 --> 00:19:37,044 Harley... [chuckling] You don't wanna do this. 383 00:19:37,076 --> 00:19:39,046 We can rule Gotham together. 384 00:19:39,046 --> 00:19:40,814 [laughing hysterically] 385 00:19:40,847 --> 00:19:42,482 You're nothing without me! 386 00:19:42,482 --> 00:19:44,853 You always tried to make me think that, but it's not true! 387 00:19:44,885 --> 00:19:47,087 I have friends that love and care about me. 388 00:19:47,122 --> 00:19:50,089 I'm moving on with my life with the people that matter. 389 00:19:50,124 --> 00:19:51,959 And that ain't you, puddin'. 390 00:19:51,991 --> 00:19:54,060 -Drop him. -Love to. 391 00:19:54,094 --> 00:19:56,096 [whimpering] You don't want to do this. 392 00:19:56,130 --> 00:19:58,199 I've always supported strong female 393 00:19:58,231 --> 00:20:01,832 friendships! [screaming] 394 00:20:11,077 --> 00:20:13,213 Oh, Ive! Oh, my God! 395 00:20:13,247 --> 00:20:15,383 It was my tears, wasn't it? 396 00:20:15,415 --> 00:20:16,817 My tears of friendship 397 00:20:16,851 --> 00:20:19,186 fell on your grave and brought you back to life! 398 00:20:19,221 --> 00:20:22,589 Harls, I love you, but we don't live in a Disney movie, okay? 399 00:20:22,624 --> 00:20:26,094 It was the renewing power of nature that brought me back. 400 00:20:26,127 --> 00:20:31,127 And, you know, maybe the tears helped a little, too. 401 00:20:31,832 --> 00:20:33,481 [screaming] 402 00:20:42,643 --> 00:20:44,292 [straining] 403 00:20:56,990 --> 00:20:59,192 Oh, my God, he saved us. 404 00:20:59,226 --> 00:21:01,028 He'll be okay, right? I mean, he's Batman. 405 00:21:01,061 --> 00:21:04,097 [uncertainly] Sure. I mean, you know, he's got the polymer suit 406 00:21:04,131 --> 00:21:05,333 -with the-- -[loud crashing] 407 00:21:05,365 --> 00:21:07,465 Oh, shit. Let's get out of here. 408 00:21:11,005 --> 00:21:12,567 [woman screams] 409 00:21:20,213 --> 00:21:23,116 [screaming] 410 00:21:23,150 --> 00:21:25,849 [Joker's laughter] 411 00:21:30,125 --> 00:21:33,627 So, to summarize, good news, Joker no longer rules Gotham. 412 00:21:33,661 --> 00:21:36,230 Bad news, thanks to an 8.6 earthquake, 413 00:21:36,262 --> 00:21:38,265 there's no longer a Gotham left to rule. 414 00:21:38,298 --> 00:21:39,932 And Batman is missing. 415 00:21:39,967 --> 00:21:41,868 More updates as we get them. 416 00:21:41,902 --> 00:21:45,352 [distant siren wailing] 417 00:21:48,175 --> 00:21:50,377 [Dr. Psycho] And I just want the record to reflect 418 00:21:50,411 --> 00:21:52,278 that I always had faith in you, Harley. 419 00:21:52,313 --> 00:21:53,948 Did not doubt it for a moment. 420 00:21:53,948 --> 00:21:57,884 I did not feel the same way, but am so glad I was wrong. 421 00:21:57,917 --> 00:21:59,153 Harls, ya did it. 422 00:21:59,185 --> 00:22:00,721 Justice League is gone, 423 00:22:00,755 --> 00:22:03,123 same with the Legion of Doom, and the Joker's dead. 424 00:22:03,156 --> 00:22:05,492 Gotham is in complete chaos. 425 00:22:05,526 --> 00:22:09,576 [Harley] It's so beautiful. 426 00:22:13,200 --> 00:22:14,768 [distant siren wailing] 427 00:22:14,800 --> 00:22:18,305 [Joker laughing] 428 00:22:18,338 --> 00:22:21,189 [laughter subsides] 429 00:22:24,211 --> 00:22:25,444 [theme music playing] 29069

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