All language subtitles for Over.Your.Dead.Body.2026.AMZN.SCOPE.eng

My darling.

I love you more
than you can imagine.

You deserve endless happiness
and infinite love.

And that's why you deserve...

the fastest 5G network
in America,

with no hidden fees
and a free NorvaCom XP4 phone.

It's time you got engaged
to Lumezza Wireless.

- And cut!
- Cut it.

Reset!

It's a cut.
Uh, good job, Frank.

Rene, that's beautiful work.
Let's go to the fifteens.

- Yes.
- Uh, it was a little low.

- I'm sorry. What?
- The phone.

They were just wanting
to get one

where the phone is
a little higher in frame.

Higher?
It's gonna be a cutaway,

so just tell him it'll be fine.

Um, just real quick.

So if we could just do
one more

where it's a little higher...

Going again!

Going again!

- Oh, thanks.
- See ya, Anna.

Hey.
Decent day.

Right?
- Yeah.

We're going up to the cabin
this weekend.

Did I tell you that?
- No. Uh...

Lisa. Lisa and I.

We're going...
going up to the cabin.

- Oh. Oh, yeah. Oh.
- Yeah.

How, uh, how are things
with you and Lisa?

Lisa's planning
a big hike for "Sunurday"...

Saturday or Sunday.
- Oh. Uh-huh.

She's going by herself
up into the mountains all alone,

which I keep telling her,

"Lisa. Lisa.
It just sounds dangerous."

Okay.

It's also supposed
to snow up there,

which feels even more dangerous.

Oh. Oh.

Well, I should get going.

But you did a great job today,

and I really value
our friendship.

Okay, well, see ya, Dan.

- Hello.
- Have a good weekend.

Oh. Yeah. It's gonna be fine.

No. Not you.
It's me.

We, uh,
we still good for tomorrow?

Uh, yeah, I'll be there.

You got the, uh...

you know,
whatever you need for...

- I got it.
- Okay. Alright. Great.

I'll see you in, uh...
- Hey. Afterwards...

Do you think we could take
the boat out?

What?

'Cause we're gonna
be up there.

Maybe we could take
the boat out for fun.

No! No!
Obviously not.

- Okay, yeah.
- Tomorrow, noon.

Don't be late.

Lisa and I are going up
to the cabin this weekend.

Oh, fuck.

You see how many fucking
blueberries are in this yogurt?

- Yeah.
- You know, everything

is just so damn sweet
these days.

The whole country's
going to hell.

Sorry about that, Dad.

Jesus.

If there are any new
details...

So Lisa is planning
this big hike for Saturday.

Yeah, she's going up into
the mountains all by herself.

I keep telling her it's very,
very dangerous.

But...
- Lisa? Is she still with you?

I thought you fucked that up.

No. We're fine.

I just thought it would be
nice to relax.

- Relax? For what?
- Yes.

From playing make-believe
with your Hollywood pedophiles?

Or maybe relax
from asking me for money.

- Okay.
- Relax from that.

I mean, you know,
you and your whole generation,

you got to have
everything handed to you.

You got to cry
when you don't get a trophy.

But you're not ready
to bleed for it.

What you all need is a good war.

Yeah, I hear that about war.
That it's good.

Yeah.
It made a man out of me.

Men are not born, Daniel.
They're made.

They're forged in a furnace
of pain and suffering,

hardened by glorious battle.

- Okay, Mr. Burton.
- Oh, fuck off, Kevin!

Sorry, Kevin.

Christ.
He's trying to poison me.

Ahh.

I should have died
over there in combat.

Not here. Not like this.
This...

Well, I should get going.

Dan, I wish a war upon you.

I know you do, Dad.

I said fuck off, Kevin!

Hey, Dan!

Hey!
Hey, Rachel.

Happy hunting.

- Hey.
- Hi.

Are you ready
for some hiking?

What the hell are you talking
about? I'm not hiking.

You always park so close
to the bushes.

Why?!

Oh, I like that.
Okay.

Okay, okay.

Can you not eat another
protein bar on the way up?

Because I want to make
you dinner,

and I don't want you to be full.

Aw.

I like it
when you tell me what to do.

How's your dad?

He's fine.
Same.

Loves you.

Utterly embarrassed
by my existence.

Is that the new play?

- Yeah.
- Yeah?

How is it?
- Yeah, it's good.

Horse!

Sorry.
What were you saying?

It's fine.

Yeah? Well, I'm certain
you will get the part.

Thank you.

I don't know, though,

because the director's kind of
a pretentious asshole, you know?

Sort of part
of our job description.

Yeah.

He's a theater director, though.

What's that supposed to mean?

Nothing.

What? Because I direct films,
I'm not as good...

Are you saying films aren't art?

No, obviously,
films can be art.

Oh, so you're saying
my films aren't art.

No, I'm saying
you don't direct films.

- I have.
- Yeah.

You directed one
eight years ago,

but now you direct pop-up ads.

O-kay!

What?

Those pop-up ads...

which is not exactly
what they are, by the way...

paid off our Visa bill.

- That you ran up.
- Supporting you.

Okay. Wow.

And your noble work in
the theater.

- Okay.
- Not Broadway, mind you.

- Alright.
- Off-season...

- Alright. Easy.
- Catskills...

jukebox musicals.
- Can we not?

Which gives you
the artistic high ground of a...

- Can we not?
- Something low.

- Can we not?
- A submarine!

Can we please, Jesus,
just pretend to be happy

for one weekend and we can just
fucking pretend?

- Yes, yes, yes.
- Please, ah!

Yes. Yes.

Yes.

I wasn't even trying
to insult you.

I was trying to insult
this fucking guy.

If it makes you feel any better,

I think you're
an amazing director.

We both know that's bullshit.

Horse!

Can you get the groceries,
please?

Yeah.

Where's the key?

It's right where you're
reaching, on top of the door.

No, it's not.

It is.
Do you want me to help you?

- No, I got it.
- Okay.

Hey, I found it.

Alright.

Ahh.

It's wine o'clock,
motherfucker.

Ha ha ha!

Ha. I have fun.
Alright.

Yes, please.

Fucking mice.

Seems like a tablespoon.

Okay, I think we're good.

Oh, hey,
have you seen my sweater?

Uh... which one?

Which one?
The one that I always wear here.

The winter one. It's blue.

It has the decorative snowflakes
on it.

Have you checked the closet?

The closet
where we keep the clothes?

Yes, I checked the closet.

Well, I haven't seen it.

Oh.
Can you not crush the garlic?

It needs to be sliced.

Yes, chef!

Okay.

I'm just...
I'm trying to follow the recipe,

and it says
thinly sliced garlic.

Oh, does it?
Okay. My God.

Okay, you know what? I'm trying
to make it nice for you.

Well, then be nice.

I'm being nice to you.

Are you? You're screaming at me
about garlic.

Garlic's garlic, mate.

- Okay.
- Okay.

Okay.

Just shut it down.
Get back to...

What were you doing?
Something.

So bendy.

That's so fibrous.
Fuck me.

- For crying out loud.
- No, no, no, no, no.

- Just grab it.
- It's not ready.

Gosh darn it to heck!

Okay. Thank you, Lisa.
- Sorry. Sorry.

Thank you. Yeah.
You're good.

Why don't you go take a bath?

Why don't you go take
a 5-hour bath?

Hey.
- Hey.

- How is it?
- Oh, yeah. It's good.

It's really good.
- Great.

I picked these cuts out
specifically.

And those peppercorns, you can't
get them on the East Coast.

I had to order them
two weeks in advance from Ohio.

You ordered
rare peppercorns from Ohio?

I did. I just...

I wanted this meal
to be really special.

Why?

There's no why.

I just wanted to cook you
your favorite food,

give you
a really nice experience.

Steak's not my favorite food.

It isn't?

Nope.

But you eat steak
all the time.

I like steak. Absolutely.

It's not my favorite.

Okay.

And what is your favorite food?

Ceviche.

- Ceviche? Ceviche?
- Ceviche.

The fish in citrus?

- Yeah.
- Funny.

I've never seen you
once order ceviche.

Never have we been
at a restaurant

and you said,
"Do you have ceviche?

Excuse me.

Do you have ceviche?

I'll start with that."

That's because
I only order it, darling,

if the restaurant does it well.

I see.
What restaurants do it well?

Peruvian ones, usually,
but any South American place.

That guy
from your acting class,

what's his...
What's his name again?

Uh, help me.

Who?

The swarthy one.

- Oh! Dario?
- Dario!

- Uh-huh.
- That's it. Yeah.

Isn't that guy from Peru?

I don't know.

What's that got to do
with anything?

Nothing.
I was changing the subject.

Oh. Okay.

How's that thing
you guys are writing together?

Oh. It's good. Yeah.
I think it's good.

- That's great.
- Yeah.

Smart to write
your own material, I think.

It's really smart.

Thank you.

Yep, yep, yep.

Yep.

So that's a triple word score.

Zek?

What the fuck is a zek?

Zek is an approved word
in the Scrabble dictionary.

Yeah,
I'm gonna challenge that.

Oh, are you? Okay.

Fucking zek.

Damn it.
- What?

You know what.

What happened?
You can say it.

It's okay.
- Uhh.

So that is...

Wow!

That's 28 points.

This is bullshit.
This is bullshit.

You just memorize short,
stupid Scrabble words.

I mean, what... what is this?
Qin?

- "Kwin."
- You don't know what qin means.

I don't have to know
what it means.

That's... That's not the rules.

Oh, yeah, but it's not fun.

Is it?

- You qin some, you lose some.
- Ohh.

I was joking around.
Oh, come on.

We used to joke like this a lot.

- I'm going to bed.
- Lis...

Don't do this.
Please don't do this.

I thought Bronwyn was
insane in that scene.

Well, no, I'm glad that she
didn't kiss her or anything.

I'm glad that Heather was like,
"Fuck you."

It's risky doing this thing.

And when you take chances,
you can fall.

And then you have to decide
to get up or stay down.

And it's like, "Sweetie,
you're on a reality show.

This is who these people are."

This is the wire
you walk on up there.

Someone's
sad sack of a husband.

So simple. You're here,
then you're not.

The real benefit is
if you don't have to suffer.

It's just...

- Do not not bring Heather...
- ...without you knowing it...

What gives you the right?

Why, the future
of our little town, of course.

The house is not for sale,
mayor.

My future or yours, James?

The lights fade.

Oh, Mayor Thompson.

I wasn't aware we had
an appointment.

Complication?
What do you mean?

Don't pretend to care about
my father's legacy.

I cared for him, cared for him.

And I care about you.

The vultures are circling
already on him.

Oh, does he now?

He has no right
to pry into our affairs.

What gives...
What gives him...

What gives you the right?

What? What?

What gives you the right?

What?
What gives you the right?

What gives you the right?

What gives you the right, Dan?

Ah!

Ew.

Mm-kay.

Wakey, wakey.

Did you pee on me?

What? No.
Dan, you peed on yourself.

What the fuck is going on?

Uh, not much.

Just having a cup of tea

and wondering
what this was for.

That's cleaning fluid.

Mm.

It smells pretty strong.

Mm-hmm.

It is strong. It's very strong.

Because that window is filthy.

And so I thought that I would...

- Knock it unconscious?
- Yeah.

Wait. No. What? What?

Unconscious?

What are you fucking
talking about?

I was also curious about these.

Those are supplies.

Those are my...
Those are my supplies for stuff.

This place is falling apart.

And what about the rocks
in the boat?

What are they for?

My boat rocks?

I was collecting them for...

I saw you, you dumbass!

Okay. What is going on?
What are you doing?

Why do you have a taser, Lisa?!

Lisa, let me go!
Lisa, let me go!

Ahh!

Fuck you. Yah!

Ha ha ha!

God damn it!

Oh! Oh!

Okay. Alright. Really?

Really cute. Hey, hey.
Let's take...

Let's act like adults
and have a conversation.

Okay? You don't even know
how to use that thing.

Okay, okay, okay. Hey!
Hey! Enough!

Lisa, enough! Lisa! Stop it!

I think you were gonna
knock me unconscious,

strangle me with that,

take me out to the boat,

tie me to the bag of rocks
you hid in there,

sink me to the bottom
of the lake.

Am I close?

The only thing I don't know
is what this guy is for.

What's the saw for, Dan?

I don't know what
the hell you're talking about.

And I think... Okay, okay.
Hey, hey.

Okay.

Bodies can float.

They can resurface
if you don't...

cut them up.

Youwere gonna cut me up?

As if.

You can't even touch raw meat.

Then what?

You were just gonna tell people

that I just wandered off into
the woods and never came back?

Fuck, you're really dumb.

You're the dumbest person
on Earth.

Why do you want to kill
me anyway?

What sick reason do you have?

Why do you fucking think,
Miss Ceviche?

When did you find out?

I saw you.

Want a little tip?

If you don't want to
get caught cheating,

maybe don't fuck a Peruvian
at a party

that your husband is also at.

You were gonna kill
and dismember me

because I slept
with someone else?

Dan...

you haven't touched me
in two years.

The last time we had sex,
we didn't even have sex.

We just jerked off next
to each other.

'Cause all you do
is fucking criticize me!

You make me feel so small.

Like I'm nothing.

Do you think
that I need help with that?

Do you think that every day
I don't wake up feeling

like a piece of shit?

And everything sounds so mean
in your stupid fucking accent.

It's like British crossed
with the devil.

I wanted a wife,
not to be married to my mother.

And I wanted a man,
not some 40-year-old toddler.

I wanted someone responsible
who had their shit together.

I thought marrying
someone 10 years older,

they'd be fucking mature.

But, no, I'm stuck with
a giant shitting baby.

How'd you like that
in my accent?

Fuck! You are so pathetic.
- I'm gonna fucking...

You are pathetic
and your plan sucks!

My plan, on the other hand...

magnifico.

And what was your plan?

Not was, bloody is.

- Hunting?
- Yes, I know.

I'm begging him not to,
but he's so excited about it.

He insists on us doing it
to help us, like, bond.

Oh, my God, that is so Dan.

I mean, why would he think
you'd be into that?

I don't know.
You know how much I hate guns.

So dangerous.
Anything could happen.

- Hey!
- Aah! Fucking Christ!

Just a few more leaves,
then I'm done.

Okay. Thanks, Henry.
I'll PayPal you.

Thank you.

- Okay. See ya.
- Oh.

Okay.

Bye.

Henry.

He went to Dan's
high school and prison.

Yeah.
Anyway, Dan helps him out.

We pay him to do
chores and stuff. b

Oh, my God,
this is such an amazing house.

I have no idea
why you'd want to move.

Yeah. You know,
just time for a change.

- Hey, Dan.
- Hey. Hey, Rachel.

Happy hunting.
Pew, pew!

I didn't want to go.

I kept telling you,
hunting was a crazy idea.

Everyone knows
how much I hate guns.

Everything was fine
until it started getting dark.

I went for a walk.

And I guess the safety must
not have been on.

Because suddenly I tripped...

...and your head splattered
all over the place.

What the fuck?

Your big plan is
to just shoot me?

That is honestly so fucked up.
- You just tried to kill me!

Yes,
but I was being nice about it.

By... By strangling me.

After cooking you
a lovely meal.

Oh, okay.

And you wouldn't
have felt anything.

You would have been unconscious.

The only thing you would have
felt is the rush of euphoria

that accompanies
cerebral hypoxia,

which I know about
because I did research.

Because I am considerate.

Yeah,
you're real considerate.

I'm feeling real
turned on right now.

Should we renew our vows?
Fucking do it on the table?

Okay, you know what?
Whatever.

It doesn't matter.
Your plan's never gonna work.

And why's that?

Because, Lisa...

you... are
a terrible fucking actress.

Fuck you.

You're rigid,
you lack presence,

and you're too fucking big.

Fuck you.

You know it's true.

And the cops are never
gonna buy your bullshit.

Because they're gonna see
exactly what I've seen

for the past seven years.

Somebody just pretending
to care.

Ha ha.

Like you can do any better.

What's happening?

I don't know what happened.

She should have been back
by now.

I told her it was too dangerous.
Can you please do something?

Can you please...
Can you please help?

You have to call somebody.

Please. Quick!
He's still breathing.

Look, she's not just gone.
I refuse to accept that.

Oh, my God,
there's so much blood.

Oh, Lisa!

Oh, my sweet and beautiful Lisa.

Stay with me, Dan!

Don't walk into the light!

Oh, heaven has another angel.

You have so much life
to live.

- Oh, God.
- Don't go. Don't go.

Oh, God, come down from heaven
and save her!

- Heaven isn't ready for you!
- Oh, God!

Oh, God!
She was so beautiful in life.

I can only hope in death,
her beauty survived!

Come on, come on.

Oh, no.

Oh, yeah, baby!

- Damn it!
- Like Benedict fucking Cum...

Fuck! Ow!

- You know what?
- Ow!

Maybe the gun went off
inside the house.

Okay. Hey, let's...
let's just talk about this.

I'm done talking.

It's time to say goodbye.

No, Lisa...

it's hammer time.

What?

I'm saying...

it's hammer time.

What are you talking about?

I'm just saying...
it's hammer time.

Now.

Now. Now!

Now is hammer time.

Now! For fuck's sake, Henry!
Hit her with the hammer!

Oh!

Sorry, that was so unclear.

Where the fuck have you been?

It's hammer time!

Whoo! Aah!

Why did you want to meet
here?

It's a theme park.
It's fun.

- It's loud!
- Exactly. It's less suspicious.

Jesus fucking Christ, man.

Also, I think there's
a dance show later.

- I don't give a shit, Henry.
- Hey, don't be rude.

You're the one who needs me.
Don't forget that.

Yeah, I know.
Just... Just for the later part.

That's the bit that I...
- Man, that's the easy part.

You know, I'm more than happy to
take care of the...

No.

I have to do that.
- Alright.

Now, about my compensation...

She's insured for $100,000.

You get half.
- Yeah.

But, like...

In addition,

I would also
like for us to hang out more.

Okay, okay. Okay, man.
Sure.

And... I'd like to have it
in writing.

You'd like to have it
in writing?

Yeah.

You'd like
to have a written document

on how we're going
to murder my wife?

I... would.

I'm not having this fucking
conversation, Henry.

Be there on time!

You're lucky
I'll be there at all.

I got shit to do, man.

Everybody dance!

Wakey, wakey.

Fuck!

My turn to ask
some questions.

- Oh.
- Don't waste your strength.

I think you'll find
that tape is quite...

God damn it! Hey! Stop!
Henry, grab her!

- Stop! Seriously, stop!
- What the fuck is he doing here?

Wrap her up!

Fuck! Get off me!
Fucking Gronk!

Oh, I knew you didn't have
the balls to do this yourself.

You have to get Henry to do it.
Fucking Henry!

Hey!
Don't not be nice.

And for your information,
he does have the balls.

He's the one doing the killing.
- That's enough.

I'm only doing
the second part

because blood makes
Dan uncomfortable.

Henry.

What reason could you possibly
have for wanting to kill me?

- You fucking kidding me?
- I knew it.

You can't even think
of a single...

You're controlling.
You're weak, you're insecure.

You pushed me to quit my job

where I was making real money
so I could focus on acting,

and you didn't even
fucking help me do that.

You didn't even give me
a tiny role in your movie.

Did you? No.
You could have.

You lost all our money, Dan.

You lost the car.
You lost the house.

You lost fucking everything.

All I wanted was to be loved
and supported.

But instead, you fucked both
of our futures up.

Now, even if I divorce you, I'll
never get away from the debt.

There it is.

The insurance money.

Yeah, Dan,
that's the only reason.

The money.
- Right.

You kill me and...
- I'm finally free.

- Well, that's weird.
- What is weird?

- Nothing.
- Nah, man.

The insurance money is
coincidence.

- Shut up, Henry.
- That's why we're killing you.

- Henry, stop talking.
- Huh.

Dario, huh?

Yeah, well... two birds.

I'm getting half, 50 thou.

I'm gonna buy an RV.

- Wait. What?
- Shut up, Henry!

- Hey, Henry! Wait!
- Hey, enough.

- Wait!
- Enough. You shut up!

And you shut your mouth!

You shut up!
You shut your mouth!

Henry! Henry! Henry!
The policy is for a mill...

Okay. Okay.

Okay. I did it, and...

Yep, it's happening now.

And it's different than
how I thought...

Oh, boy. It'll be over soon.

Dan.

- Yes.
- Take the bag off.

What the fuck are you doing?
Henry!

Take it off.
Let her talk.

Henry, I'm in the middle
of something right now.

Do it!

Fine. Is that what you want?
Are you happy?

Henry.
Henry, listen to me.

The policy is for
a million... dollars

You lied to me?

No. Absolutely not.
You misheard me.

Yeah, he lied to you,
but I will give you half.

Oh, fuck you.

- Yep, 500 grand.
- 500 grand.

You just shoot him
in the fucking face!

- Alright.
- 750.

Henry, just shoot her.
Shoot her!

- 750?
- All of it.

- All of it?
- I will give you $1 million.

Well, now you know she's lying.

Henry, shoot her in the head,

and then we'll take
the boat out!

- With fishing?
- With fishing.

- The boat... The boat.
- I...

I will set you up
with one of my friends.

- Rachel?
- Yeah. Rachel. Yes.

- For fuck's sake.
- She likes you.

Aah!

You're not my buddy!
You lied.

Give me the gun,
you fucking psycho!

You never wanted to be
my friend.

Grow up! Fuck!

Okay, guys...

I think we all...

- Oh, my God!
- Oh, my God.

- Jesus Christ!
- Oh, my God.

- What did you do?
- What did Ido?

You pulled the trigger.

You were holding
the fucking barrel.

Oh, can you just for once admit
when you're wrong?

I am not wrong.

I was holding the gun like this.
- Yeah.

Ah! God damn it!

Oof!

Ah!

Okay. Okay.

- Oh, shit!
- Aah!

Aaaaaah!

My fucking foot!

You stabbed my fucking foot!

- Ha ha!
- Uhh!

Aah! Fuck!

Fuck!

Fuck you!

Fuck!

Oh! Ow ow ow ow!

That's your favorite movie?

Rock.

Oh!

Ahh.

Cornflakes.
You want?

As the manhunt has
expanded further to the north,

police again are seeking
any information

as to the whereabouts
of Correctional Officer

Allegra Danvers
and two convicted killers,

Peter Jacob Hughes
and Todd James Templeton.

What a dork.
Stupid fucking hat.

Yes.
Ah! Oh!

Oh, God! Oh! Ah!

You savage! You dirty pig!
You dirty pig!

Who's my filthy little piggy?

And say you love me.

- Sure.
- Oh!

Penguins.

So we stay here for a couple
of days till things mellow out.

Then we try to find a car.

Dressed like this?

This guy's clothes suck.

I don't know.
I like a big wooly sweater.

It's kind of cozy.

Shit!

Can you get the groceries,
please?

I say we jump 'em.

What if more people show up?

Oh, boys.

- Shit! Fuck me!
- Pete!

Where's the key?

It's right where you're
reaching, on top of the door.

No, it's not.

Hurry!

It's wine o'clock,
motherfucker.

Ha ha ha!

Baby,
can't we just kill them?

We lay low.
We ride it out.

Just be patient.

Where are you going?

I have to pee.

- Here you go.
- Don't give her...

Thanks, Toddy.

You're welcome.

You can't just hold it?

I'm not gonna piss
in my pants.

I have dignity.

I have dignity.

I'm bored.

I said I'm bored.

Correct.
This is boring.

Be bored, honey.

Let's, like, do something.

What do you want to do?
You want to play charades?

I'll play Charades.

Okay.

I wasn't being...

- I'll go first.
- Movie.

Nose.

Scissors. Scissors.

Two words, Todd.

Nose. A heart.

Heart. Your heart.

Heart. Heart you?

Your sweater. Your heart.

Me. Me. Me.

Heart. Me heart.

Me! Me heart!

Shut the fuck up!

It's her favorite movie.

Nose.

Shh! Hey,
there's another one coming.

Rock your baby.
Pet your baby.

Um...
- This one's fucking weird.

- "Babe"! Pig in the city!
- No.

- "Throw Momma from the Train."
- No!

"Mommy Dearest."

"Harry Potter."

- No.
- Just shut up.

He's almost got it, Pete.

You're being so discouraging.

Why are you so discouraging?

- Shut the fuck up!
- You shut the fuck up!

Uhh!

Oh, shit!

- "Mamma Mia"!
- Yes!

Oh! Ow.

That's your favorite movie?

Wakey, wakey.

What the fuck?

What the fuck?

What is on the steak?

Huh?

Is it some kind of
special pepper?

Yeah.
Yeah. Yes.

I told you.
It was pepper.

You guessed it.

Delicious. Mmm.

It's very good, this pepper.

It's from... from Ohio.

Oh! Go, Buckeyes!

I'm sorry.

Um, who are you?

I'm Pete.
That's Allegra.

It's Italian.

Good afternoon.
- The big guy's Todd.

You shot me in the ass.

Now,
normally in a conversation,

this is
where I'd ask for your names.

But in my experience, it's
better to keep you dehumanized.

So for now, let's call you...

Ron and Hermione.

- Say again.
- Ron and Hermione.

Ron...

Hermione, I hate to overstep,

but it seems like you
guys have some marital issues.

Who did this guy piss off?

Oh. Him.
He did that.

Excuse me.
Wedid that.

He pulled the trigger.

We discussed this.

I may have been holding
the barrel, but you came up...

Ronald Weasley.

He was try...

It was an accident.

How did it feel?

It was pretty good. Right?

When the lights go out,

there's just nothing else there.

It's just...
There's just nothing.

That's it.

That's cool. Right?

What do you want?

Fine. No small talk.

For the past seven years,

my colleague Todd
and I were wards of the state

until we were granted early
and unofficial parole.

Now...
- Because we're in love.

What?

Well,
if you're gonna tell the story,

don't skip out on the best part.

I was a corrections officer.

I helped him escape
because we're in love.

Isn't that right?

Yeah.

Yeah, no, yeah.

We're in love.

Anyhow, our plan has bumped up
against a liquidity problem,

and what we require now is cash.

My wallet is right upstairs.
You can...

Believe it or not,
it did occur to us

to check your wallet and purse.

And we're very appreciative of
the 53 whole dollars we found.

Okay,
but, um, there's another $200.

$200 in the, uh, ceramic pot
in the office upstairs.

Just take it.
Take it and go.

- My God.
- And we're not gonna say...

Aren't you hospitable?

And if we were looking
to purchase a high-end blender,

why, we'd be well on our way.

But we require more than that.

Thoughts?

We don't have anything else.

I swear to God,
we don't have anything.

Ron, do you really expect
me to believe you spent

your last dime
on special pepper?

He did. He does that.
He's bullshit with money.

- No, I'm not.
- Yes, you are.

- No, I'm not.
- We're broke because you

had to pretend you were rich.
- In our industry...

In our industry, it's important
to keep up appearances.

And so...
- It's not a thing.

- Can you not do this right now?
- Hey. - What?

Your purse had to be
Louis Vuitton.

Large knife!
Large knife! Large knife!

Honey.

Can I...
Can I take a stab at this?

I'll trade you.

Thank you.

Todd, circle up.

Cool.

Please. No, no, no, no, no,

please, please,
please, please, don't.

Oh, my God, please don't.
Please don't.

Fuck. I'm so sorry.
I'm so sorry.

Whatever I did, I'm so sorry.

Oh, fucking relax!

You know what the worst part
about working in a prison is?

It's the night shift.
It's so boring.

Everybody's asleep.

There's no action,

there's no contraband searches,
and it's just quiet.

And so me and a couple of the
guards, we got together,

and we... we got it in our minds

to, um, play
this really fun game.

- Honey.
- What?

Can you...

Why are you always
micromanaging me?

It's fun.
I want to have fun.

I'm having fun, too.

Anyway...
super easy to learn.

We just go
and grab a couple of guys

and we would drag them
out of their cells,

down to the laundry room
where it was nice and quiet,

and then draw this big circle
around them,

and then we would see
who could fuck who first.

No, no, no, no, no.

And the winner would get
a pack of cigarettes.

And the loser, well,
the loser would just get fucked.

No.

No, I don't...
I don't want to.

Of course you don't want to!

That's the whole point
is you don't wanna.

If you don't want to play the
game, you don't have to play.

Thank God.

You just tell us
where your money's at.

No, listen, please.
I'm not...

Okay.
- Unh-unh-unh.

Oh. Right, I understand.
Sorry.

I understand.

I'm not lying to you.
Please.

I respect you, I respect you.

I wouldn't lie to you.
We don't have any money.

Please.
Please don't do this to me.

Oh, my God.

You know you have
a fighting chance

because you got
a couple inches on him.

And the good news is,
Todd now has a handicap.

Because you shot me
in the ass.

But the bad news is,

he's gotten really good
at playing this game.

We don't have to do this.

Listen to me.
We don't have to do this.

We can think
of another solution.

Let's think of another way.

We'll all think of a way.
- Todd, honey, are you ready?

- Hold on.
- What the fuck?

- Alright, let's go.
- Ron...

I'm not ready.
I don't want to do it.

Fucking hold on, please.
Just wait.

Let's just stop doing this.

- On your marks.
- No! I said I'm not ready!

- Get set!
- Stop! Don't fucking do this!

Play ball!

Oh, my God!

I don't have any money!

I overdrew my account
months ago!

What?

- Please, please, please.
- Ron, you're out of the circle!

They never stay in the circle.

Oh, fuck.
Please, I'll do anything.

It's gonna get messy.

No, please.

Please, please, please, please,
please, please.

Aah!

I want to watch your eyes
when it first goes in.

Oh, we got a wiggler.
We got a wiggler.

Hold up, hold up, hold up,
hold up, hold up, hold up!

Why do you have that?
- What?

That, uh, the movie poster.

Are you just a big fan
or something?

It's my film.
I directed...

I directed it.

- You directed that?
- Yes.

Dude,
are you fucking with me?

No, I swear to God, I'm not.

- You fucking directed that?
- Yes.

- I love that movie!
- He loves that movie.

You saw it?

Oh, my God, I've seen it
multiple times.

In the theater?

No, I've been in prison.
What are you talking about?

On movie night.
- Movie night.

- We saw it together.
- Movie night.

Oh, but, honey,
that's a good movie.

You love that movie.

That's a very fucking
good movie.

It's solid.

You know, one thing
I did think,

at the end,

the main guy is kind of a pussy,

but you're rooting for him.

He should have sacrificed
himself.

I know.

Producers wanted
a happy ending,

so I had to give them
what they wanted.

Oh, no.

You wanted to do the...
- Yes.

And they...

Oh!

It's your movie, not theirs.

You have to fight for that shit.

I know.

But seriously,
you got a real voice.

It's good stuff.

- Thank you.
- You know what I'm saying?

I do. It means
a lot coming from you.

Okay. Alright.
As you were.

What? No! Fuck!
Oh, God. No, no, no!

Lisa, do something!
Lisa, do something!

- No.
- Please don't do this to me.

Fuck.

- What's the issue?
- Hold on.

- Oh, yeah. Here we go.
- No, no, no!

- Here we go.
- Oh, God, ohh!

Give me a second.
Here we go.

Nah.

Sorry, guys.

What the fuck, Todd?

Can we just get this
over with?

No. No, no.

Ah!

Fuck! Please.
Please, please.

Open your eyes.

Open your eyes!

Don't be rude.
Say goodbye to your wife.

No, please don't.

Say goodbye
to your fucking wife!

Say goodbye.

Goodbye.

Stop, stop, stop, stop!

Okay, I have money.

I have money.
I have 50 grand.

I've been setting it aside.

There's a bank...
There's a bank in town.

When it opens, you can have it.

You can have all of it.

Just fucking don't touch us,
either of us.

Okay. Deal.

Well, that wasn't so hard now,
was it?

Again... big fan.

This marks the second year...

- G... Eh!
- I have to...

I have to dig in it.
- Ah!

In other news, a raccoon
by the name of Felix

has been seen all
over Southfield

on top of people's cars.

Dan?

Dan.

How did we get here?

I was so in love with you.

When we found each other,
I thought, um...

...I thought...

we'd always be a team,

that we would take
on the world together,

that...

that we'd have a good life.

I don't know what happened.

It got so ugly.

And then, um...

...Dario.

I don't even know why I did it.

I think maybe I wanted to
get caught.

I think I wanted you
to fight for us.

I'm so sorry.

Whatever.

They're gonna kill us anyway.

Okay.

Tomorrow we take her
to the bank,

get the money,
kill them both,

drive south,
find a spot to ditch the car,

cross the border.

You're just gonna
ditch the car?

Well, yeah.

Stolen car stuffed
with dead bodies, so...

It's a really nice car,
and it could be helpful.

You don't care about that?

- Uh...
- You just...

You don't care
that that car has been nothing

but helpful to us in our escape?

Like, where's the respect
for that?

Where's the... the basic level
of human decency?

It's a Volvo.

What I'm saying is we
can get rid of it

because we won't have
any use for it.

I'm just saying, Pete, that if
you get rid of that automobile

like it's a piece
of fucking trash,

you better be careful
that it doesn't come back

and just burn your
fucking dick off.

How?

Hello?! Hey!

- What are you doing?
- Hey! Hey!

Can you go see what
the fuck's going on?

I gotta deal with her.

- Hello?!
- Yeah.

Hey! Hello!

Can somebody come down?!

What do you want,
Ron Weasley?

I have to go to the bathroom.

Ah, you piss in
your fucking pants.

It's number two.

Oh.

Hey, are they allowed
to take dumps?!

Yeah, fine!

Alright.

Yeah.
- Oh, fuck.

Oh, God. God.
Okay, okay.

You're not gonna do
anything dumb now, are you?

No.
I just have to take a shit.

Okay? I swear to God.
Please, please.

- Alright.
- Fuck.

Okay.
- Get up.

Okay.

No, no, no, no.
Wait, wait, wait, wait.

Eh...

Hmm? Hmm?
- You got me.

Go on.

Go potty.

You're not allowed
to touch me.

But I'm not touching you.

I'm not touching you.

I'm not touching you.

I'm not touching you.

Boop, boop.

I'm not touching you.

Come on out, Weasley.

Hey.
Hey, what the fuck?

Oh!

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
- Hey, hey.

- Okay.
- Shh.

Okay. Wait a minute.

What? Dan!
Fuck!

- Shh.
- Da...

Okay.

I'm sorry, baby.

Baby...

Where's my baby?

Hmm?
Where's my baby girl?

Is that my baby girl?

Hmm?

Shit.

Okay. Okay.

That's my baby girl.

Oh, you're such an asshole.

Oh.

Fuck me!
Fuck me!

Oh, you fucking pig,
do it now.

Todd, are we good?!

Fuck me.

- Fuck.
- Todd?

- Oh, God. He's fine.
- Are we good?

Todd!
- I'm sure he's fine.

God damn it!

Todd!
- He's fine.

Todd?

What the fuck?
- Oh, my God.

Todd.

Hey.
Look at me.

What happened?

- Weasley hit me with a sock.
- With what?

- A sock?
- Yeah.

Fuck!

Fuck!

She can't be far.

Todd, you take the road.

I'll take the forest.

Okay.

Shit.

Okay. Okay. Shit. Okay.

Okay. Shit. Come on. Okay.

Okay, okay. Um... Um...

Um... Um...

Okay.

Dang it!

Peekaboo.

I see you.

Drop it.

What you got in your other hand
there?

- Oh. Nothing.
- Give it over.

- I was...
- Shut up!

Okay, okay.

Boop!

Remember the money.

No, no, no, no, no, no.
See, that deal's over.

You guys hit me in the head,

so now you've gotta fucking die.

Those are the rules.

Rules?
What... What fucking rules?

Okay, okay. Please.
You don't have to do this.

That's what everybody says.

Please.
We can figure something out.

We can figure something out.
- And they say that, too.

Listen, listen.

Listen, okay,
'cause there's something...

There's something
you don't know.

There's something
you don't know.

I'm pregnant.
- Ah.

I'm 12.5 weeks.
It's a little girl.

Mmmm... no.

Bullshit.

I swear I'm not lying.
I swear.

Nah, you would
have said something before.

I couldn't say anything
before because...

I had an affair.
Okay?

And it's not my husband's.

Oh.

Poor old Ron Weasley.

I didn't want to hurt him.
I didn't want to hurt him.

Please,
just let me go. Please.

She didn't do anything
to anyone.

Please.
Please don't kill my baby.

Please don't kill my baby.

Fine.

I just won't shoot you
in the stomach.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no!

- Aah!
- Please, no!

Oh. Oh, shit!

Ah!

Ah! God.

Fuck off!

Fuck off!

You go there!

Aaaahhh!

Ah! My eyes!

Fucking hell! Oh, shit!

Aah!

Ooh!

Oh, my God!

Oh, my God! Okay!

Okay. Aaaah!

Fuck!
Okay, okay, okay, okay.

Oh, oh, whole thing.
Okay.

Die, you cunt!

Oh, my God.

Oh, God.

Okay.
- Ah!

- Oh! Fucking hell! Okay.
- Ah!

Uhhhhh...

Dumbledore.

I caught the snitch.

Todd!

Boat keys, boat keys.
Come on.

Oh, fuck.

- Go, go, go, go.
- Okay, okay, okay. Shit.

Todd!

Oh, my God!

Oh, no!
Oh, my God! Toddy?!

Toddy?! Oh, no!

Why would anybody do this?

He was such a great person.

Oh, I'm gonna kill you,
you motherfuckers!

- Dan, come on.
- Okay.

Fuck.

This is all my fault.

You're right.

I didn't fight for you.

I didn't fight for us.

Outside.

When things started
falling apart with us,

I got so scared.

I just felt like such a failure.

And I didn't know
how to stop it...

...how to fix it.

So I just gave up, I think.

I'm so sorry.

- Hey.
- They're coming.

I want you to get to
the boat.

I want you to run.

- What about you?
- It's not important.

I know that you're pregnant,
and I know it's not mine.

I don't care.

- No, no, no, Dan...
- Shh.

It's funny. After all
this fucking shit,

when I heard you,
my first thought, I wasn't mad.

I was really excited.

No, Dan, I was lying.

- What?
- I had to stall him.

- You're not pregnant?
- No.

- At all?
- Not even a little bit.

Lisa...

that was the best fucking acting
I've ever seen.

Yeah?

Gotcha.

Ah!

Fucking bitch!

Sorry, sweetheart.

Uhh!

Oh!

Oh! Oh, my...

Oh!

Oh!

It's broken!

Oh, my God! Oh, my God.

Thank you.

Let's go.

Fucking nail him!

He hurt my back.
Fucking asshole!

- Aah!
- Uhh!

I'm sorry.

Remember me?

This is what happens
when you fuck with...

- Todd.
- Todd!

Yes! My name is Todd.

- Aah!
- Oh!

Fucking hold her.

Let me tell you something,
Ron Weasley.

You kill enough people,

it honestly
starts to get a bit boring.

Like in a relationship,

the key is finding ways
to keep things fresh.

Isn't that right, honey?

- Aaaaaah!
- Dan!

Stay.

I've stabbed, choked, smothered,

melted my old scoutmaster
with acid.

It was more trouble
than it was worth.

Very hard to get acid.

But one thing I've never done

is shove someone's face
into a lawnmower.

Come on.

So thank you for this!

- No.
- Oh, shut up and watch.

Go ahead, honey.

No, please.
No, no, please!

Please, please, please.

- Isn't this fun?
- Fuck, no!

Please! Please!

We're trying something new
together.

Please, please. Please!

Shut the fuck up!

Aah!

He's not gonna have a face.

Aah, fuck!

Aah!

Shit.

Who fucked up my window?

Hmm.

Well, that don't look right.

Mm.

Oh.

What the fuck?

Oh.

Oh.

Michael Burton speaking.

Mike, can you hear me?

It's Carl Marshall,
down by the lake.

- Carl?
- Yeah.

I'm just phoning to say, Mike,

that I was driving
past your place,

and, uh, I had to go

to the 24-hour convenience
store, you know?

So, Mike,
I took the back way.

You know, I prefer
the back way to the front.

Potato starch and some tomatoes.

Carl.
What is this about?

Oh. I'm sorry.

I was driving past your place
and...

- One second, Mike. One second.
- Oh, my God.

Excuse me.

Okay, so...

One of your pots
was out on the front lawn.

- What?
- And also,

one of your windows
was smashed.

Look, Carl.
Goodbye, Carl.

Mike?

Mike?!

That fucking kid.

Whoa, whoa, Mr. Burton.

I need you to go back
to your room.

I'm sorry, Kevin, I gotta go.

There's a problem
up at my cabin.

Mr. Burton, please.

Give me your
fucking car keys, man.

Don't wait up.

Fuck, yeah.

Oh, fuck me!

What is this shit?

What the fuck?

No. No. No. No.

Jesus Christ!

Turn music off!

You motherfucker!

What? You gotta be kidding me.

Kevin, you asshole!

Hey, cupcake. Fill it up.

No, thanks.

Yeah, yeah.

Turn it up!

Dan?

Shit.

Who fucked up my window?

Baby!

- Dad?!
- Dan.

Are you broken?

So who are these dusty cunts?

Who the fuck are you?

Can you hear me?

Oh, hey. Hey, hey!

Stay the fuck back, old man.

I'll slit her fucking throat!

You good, Lis?

Mm-hmm.

Toddy!

Alright.

Who's next?

Is it you?

- Dad! Look out!
- Ugh!

No!

Die, you fucking ape!

Aah!

Oh! Oh, my God!

- Oh.
- Fuck!

Oh!

You gonna die, old man?

No.

I'm gonna eat your nose.

Oh!

I'm gonna get ya!

Dad!

Run, Danny.

Your nose tastes like shit.

Dan. Get in the car.

No! Fucking come on!

What the fuck is happening?!

Dad! Dad!

Ugh! Ugh!

Come on! Come on!

Oh!

Lisa.

Lisa.

Lisa, wake up.

Lisa. Lisa, wake up.

Lisa.

- Uhh.
- Lisa?

Ah. Oh, ho.

What? Okay.

That's okay, that's okay.

Hey!

It goes right there.

He shot off my... my hair.

What... Does it look...
Does it look okay?

How does it look?

It looks fine.

You know what?
I actually think it looks good.

Okay.

- Let's focus.
- Okay.

- Right here.
- Okay.

I need you to get to the boat.

Okay?
- Okay.

Okay?

Where are you going?

I have to go take care
of something.

Hold on.
I don't want to lie to you.

I don't want to lie to you
ever again, okay?

I want to start
communicating honestly.

The whole side of your head
looks like shit.

It looks like a total nightmare.

I don't want to repress
things anymore.

Dan, Dan, I appreciate
what you're trying to do,

I really do,
but now is not the fucking time!

Right, right.
Okay, let's fucking go.

Okay.

I'm in so much pain! Ow!

Ow! Ah!

Okay.
We just gotta wrap this up.

Okay?

Honey, help me up.

Nah, I'm good.

Wait, what?

Uh,
I think we should break up.

- What?
- Yeah.

It's just not working out
for me.

What are you talking about?

It was...
It's just a setback.

Ah, you motherfucker!

Oh, you're a fucking coward!

You fucking piece of shit!

I will cut your fucking dick
off, shithead!

Motherfucker!

Fucking piece of shit asshole!

Shit.
Oh, my God.

I knew I shouldn't
have left my fucking job.

Ohh!

Oh, that goes over there.

That goes there. Okay.

Ewwww, God.

Oh, God.
Oh, God.

Okay.
That's good. Okay.

Oh, God!

Ow! Uhh!

Oh! That's better.
That's better.

Ooh, that's better.

Shit! Fuck you!

Okay.

God damn it!
Work!

We've got ourselves
a wiggler.

No! Wait.

Don't shoot.

I'd like my sweater back.

Wait.
I just wanted to say I'm sorry.

I wasn't in my right mind.

I was being manipulated.
I was totally brainwashed.

I didn't see you as human.

But we are. I'm human.
You're human.

I see you now.

Please let me go.

I'll just run away
into the woods

and we'll never know
this happened.

Fuck!

You...
You fucking piece of shit!

Oh, my God,
you're not gonna kill a cop!

Go ahead.
Make my day, asshole.

Kill a federal officer!

That's what I am.

They'll all come after you.

You motherfucker,
titty-sucking, 2-balled bitch.

I fucking dare...

Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh.

Jesus Christ!

Okay.
Come on, you fucking thing.

Yes.

Where are we going?

Dan!!

Oof!

Where is this fucking bank?

Aren't you gonna go back
for your girlfriend?

Were you just gonna ditch her?

Technically, we broke up.

She was a lot.

You met her.
- Yeah.

Here's the plan, Hermione.

You're gonna clean yourself up,

go into the bank,
get my 50 grand,

or I kill you

and leave you in the trunk
of a car like my sister!

Uhh!

I'm gonna kill you,
you fucking piece of shit!

Motherfucker!

- Aah!
- Fuck! Ow.

Hey, asshole!

Eat shit!

Wow!

You two deserve each other.

Ugh!

New plan.

Now you can watch me do what you
were too big of a pussy to do,

which is kill your fucking wife.

Get... the fuck...

away... from my wife!

Come on!

Oh! Oh!

I really did like your movie.

A shame there's
not gonna be a sequel.

Aah!

Ohh!

Fuck you guys.

Oh! Dan!

It's okay.

It's okay.

No!

Come on!

Police will be here soon.

I found your fingers.

Thanks.

Hey.

I'm sorry I tried
to kill you.

I'm sorry I tried
to kill you, too.

So what now?

We're just right back to
where we started?

Still broke.

Still gonna lose everything?

Still got all our shit
to deal with.

So let's deal with it.

Okay.

But specifically how?

You know?
Like, do you have an idea?

Yeah.

I got an idea.

Can you tell us
what happened in there?

I don't even really know.

It's just such a blur.

Well, we just came
for a vacation.

Next thing we knew,

we were attacked by this group
of very, very angry people.

Were there
any other survivors?

Just my beautiful husband.

You know, at some point,
you realize

you don't care about yourself.
I just...

I wanted to make sure
that my wife was okay.

Dan's father, a retired Marine.

Has struck a chord
with people across the country.

Lisa Burton,
the miraculous survivors

of the cabin attack.

You must have been terrified.

How did you survive?

I guess in a word...

Love.

Freak bitch!

Yeah. Love.

Aw, I love that.

And I hear Hollywood is making
this story into a movie.

Is that right?

Yes.

We're finally gonna
get make a film together.

And this is gonna be
streaming?

It is. It's for streaming.

- Which is fine.
- Yeah.

Everything's on streaming
these days.

- It's just as good.
- Better.

Well, congratulations,
you guys.

Give it up for Dan and Lisa.

It really happened to them.

What the hell
do you want from us?

Just a little cash, baby.

I'm gonna make you beg,
bitch.

And I'm gonna have
some fun with you, boy.

Hold him down.

You ready, Ron?

No.

Ow, my balls!

Rack 'em up.

Ow, my balls.

Let's get the hell
out of here.

And cut!

Was that okay?

Kamil, it was great.

- Are you sure?
- I'm sure. Yeah.

Yeah.
You were great.

- Oh, no.
- Dan. Dan, dan.

Can we try just one more?

No.

We're good.