All language subtitles for Californication S05E05 The Ride-Along

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:06,660 --> 00:00:08,830 - PREVIOUSLY ON CALIFORNICATION... 2 00:00:08,860 --> 00:00:10,560 YOU'RE SO BEAUTIFUL, YOU'RE ALMOST UGLY. 3 00:00:10,590 --> 00:00:12,530 IT'S OFF-PUTTING. I'M HANK. 4 00:00:12,560 --> 00:00:13,760 - IT WAS NICE TO MEET YOU, HANK. 5 00:00:13,800 --> 00:00:16,270 - BYE, MISS NEVER-GOT-YOUR-NAME. 6 00:00:16,300 --> 00:00:18,300 - I'M GONNA DO MY OWN THING, MY OWN MOMENT. 7 00:00:18,340 --> 00:00:21,640 SANTA MONICA COP IS MY EDDIE MURPHY MOMENT RIGHT NOW. 8 00:00:21,670 --> 00:00:23,210 GET YOUR SEXY ASS OVER HERE. 9 00:00:23,240 --> 00:00:25,440 HANK MOODY, THIS IS MY PROTEGE, KALI. 10 00:00:25,480 --> 00:00:26,440 BETTER NOT BE HITTING ON MY GIRL. 11 00:00:26,480 --> 00:00:28,210 WHAT'S UP, MAN? 12 00:00:28,250 --> 00:00:29,350 YOU SHOULD BE AT STARBUCKS WRITING ME SOME FUNNY SHIT, MAN. 13 00:00:29,380 --> 00:00:30,680 - I DON'T THINK I CAN DO IT. 14 00:00:30,710 --> 00:00:35,150 - GET YOUR PAWS OFF HER, AND YOUR FUCKING PENIS. 15 00:00:35,190 --> 00:00:36,620 - I'D LIKE TO INTRODUCE YOU TO RICHARD BATES. 16 00:00:36,650 --> 00:00:38,220 - HAVEN'T TOUCHED THE STUFF 17 00:00:38,260 --> 00:00:40,220 SINCE SLICK WILLY WAS IN THE WHITE HOUSE. 18 00:00:40,260 --> 00:00:41,590 POUR ME ANOTHER. 19 00:00:41,630 --> 00:00:44,260 HE UNVEILED HIS BEAUTIFUL MAN-PUSSY. 20 00:00:44,290 --> 00:00:45,460 - HOW'S BECCA? 21 00:00:45,500 --> 00:00:47,560 - THE BOYFRIEND, I WANNA KILL HIM, HANK. 22 00:00:47,600 --> 00:00:49,200 - HEY, TYLER. 23 00:00:49,230 --> 00:00:51,300 - THIS--THIS IS-- THIS IS NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE. 24 00:00:51,340 --> 00:00:52,640 THIS IS MY SISTER. 25 00:00:52,670 --> 00:00:54,270 - WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT ALL ABOUT? 26 00:00:54,300 --> 00:00:56,110 - SOME GUY MY DAUGHTER'S SEEING. 27 00:00:56,140 --> 00:00:57,610 I THINK HE'S GONNA BREAK HER HEART. 28 00:00:57,640 --> 00:00:59,540 - MAYBE YOU SHOULD BREAK HIS LEGS FIRST. 29 00:00:59,580 --> 00:01:01,150 - TYLER WAS LEAVING SOME CLUB IN HOLLYWOOD, 30 00:01:01,180 --> 00:01:02,880 AND HE GOT JUMPED BY A BUNCH OF GANGBANGERS. 31 00:01:02,910 --> 00:01:04,850 [phone beeps] 32 00:01:16,530 --> 00:01:17,590 [gunshots] 33 00:01:20,330 --> 00:01:21,670 - WOW. 34 00:01:21,700 --> 00:01:23,270 KILLING BAD GUYS IS YOUR BUSINESS, 35 00:01:23,300 --> 00:01:25,570 AND BUSINESS BE FUCKING CRACKIN', YO. 36 00:01:25,600 --> 00:01:27,600 - THAT'S RIGHT, MOTHERFUCKER. 37 00:01:27,640 --> 00:01:30,540 KNOW WHO THAT IS? - UH, NO. 38 00:01:30,570 --> 00:01:33,240 IT LOOKS KINDA LIKE RYAN SEACREST THOUGH. 39 00:01:33,280 --> 00:01:35,310 - WHAT THE FUCK YOU GOT AGAINST RYAN SEACREST, MAN? 40 00:01:35,350 --> 00:01:36,610 - NOTHING IN PARTICULAR. 41 00:01:36,650 --> 00:01:37,850 THE GUY JUST BUGS THE SHIT OUTTA ME. 42 00:01:37,880 --> 00:01:39,250 - WHY? 43 00:01:39,280 --> 00:01:40,280 THIS MOTHERFUCKER, HE WORKS HARD, 44 00:01:40,320 --> 00:01:41,490 MAKE MILLIONS OF DOLLARS, 45 00:01:41,520 --> 00:01:42,720 AND HE GOT A FUCKING CATCHPHRASE, 46 00:01:42,750 --> 00:01:44,250 WHICH I DON'T HAVE, ALL RIGHT? 47 00:01:44,290 --> 00:01:45,460 AND YOU WANNA KILL HIM DEAD? 48 00:01:45,490 --> 00:01:46,660 THAT'S SOME HARSH SHIT, MOODY. 49 00:01:46,690 --> 00:01:48,360 YOU GOT TOO MUCH NEGATIVE ENERGY IN YOU. 50 00:01:48,390 --> 00:01:49,690 YOU NEED TO WORK THAT SHIT THE FUCK OUT. 51 00:01:49,730 --> 00:01:51,660 - WELL, EXCUSE ME. 52 00:01:51,700 --> 00:01:54,360 - NO, THAT'S FUCKING KALI'S NEW BOYFRIEND RIGHT THERE, MAN. 53 00:01:54,400 --> 00:01:57,570 - OH, SHE'S GOT A NEW BOYFRIEND, DOES SHE? 54 00:01:57,600 --> 00:01:58,940 - I DON'T KNOW, MAN, 55 00:01:58,970 --> 00:02:00,500 BUT SHE MOVED OUT OF MY FUCKING CRIB LAST WEEK, 56 00:02:00,540 --> 00:02:02,240 TALKING ABOUT SHE AIN'T COMFORTABLE 57 00:02:02,270 --> 00:02:03,610 MIXING BUSINESS AND PLEASURE ANYMORE. 58 00:02:03,640 --> 00:02:05,210 WHAT KINDA SHIT IS THAT, MAN? 59 00:02:05,240 --> 00:02:07,280 - DID SHE SAY SHE WAS SEEING SOMEONE ELSE? 60 00:02:07,310 --> 00:02:08,580 - FUCK NO. 61 00:02:08,610 --> 00:02:10,380 BUT I KNOW HOW THAT SHIT GOES, MAN. 62 00:02:10,410 --> 00:02:12,520 I MEAN, SOMEBODY GOTTA BE TAPPING THAT ASS, 63 00:02:12,550 --> 00:02:13,750 'CAUSE THAT ASS IS TOO FINE 64 00:02:13,780 --> 00:02:15,420 NOT TO BE TAPPED. 65 00:02:15,450 --> 00:02:17,420 AND THAT MR. SOMEONE WILL GET HIS MOTHERFUCKING DICK 66 00:02:17,450 --> 00:02:18,920 SHOT THE FUCK OFF. 67 00:02:18,960 --> 00:02:21,390 - HEY, YOU KNOW, DON'T DO ANYTHING CRAZY, 68 00:02:21,430 --> 00:02:23,260 SAM YOU AM. 69 00:02:23,290 --> 00:02:26,930 YOU'RE MERE MONTHS AWAY FROM BECOMING AN A-LIST "RAPTOR." 70 00:02:26,960 --> 00:02:28,570 - WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT? 71 00:02:28,600 --> 00:02:30,300 - RAPPER TURNED ACTOR. GET IT? 72 00:02:30,330 --> 00:02:31,440 - NO, I DON'T GET THAT. 73 00:02:31,470 --> 00:02:32,600 - I LIKE IT. 74 00:02:32,640 --> 00:02:34,270 WHATEVER. 75 00:02:34,300 --> 00:02:37,740 - FUCKING BITCH JUST DRIVES ME CRAZY, MAN. 76 00:02:37,770 --> 00:02:39,440 YOU KNOW WHAT, MAYBE IT'S THE CASE OF A NIGGA 77 00:02:39,480 --> 00:02:41,310 WHO WANTS SOME SHIT HE CAN'T HAVE. 78 00:02:41,350 --> 00:02:42,350 - TRUE DAT. 79 00:02:42,380 --> 00:02:44,410 THIS NIGGA HAS OFTEN 80 00:02:44,450 --> 00:02:46,580 FELL PREY TO THAT ON SOME OCCASIONS. 81 00:02:46,620 --> 00:02:47,920 I'M SORRY. 82 00:02:47,950 --> 00:02:49,520 MY BAD. 83 00:02:49,550 --> 00:02:52,590 I MEAN, YOU KNOW, I'M IN THE WRONG THERE. 84 00:02:52,620 --> 00:02:53,990 - WHAT YOU DOING TONIGHT, MAN? 85 00:02:54,020 --> 00:02:55,330 - MMM? - WHAT YOU DOING TONIGHT? 86 00:02:55,360 --> 00:02:56,760 - NOTHING. - WRONG. 87 00:02:56,790 --> 00:02:58,360 YOU'RE ROLLING WITH ME ON A RIDE-ALONG. 88 00:02:58,400 --> 00:02:59,830 - A RIDE-ALONG? 89 00:02:59,860 --> 00:03:01,670 - YEAH, WITH THE REAL SANTA MONICA P.D. 90 00:03:01,700 --> 00:03:03,330 I GOTTA GET MY FUCKING COP. 91 00:03:03,370 --> 00:03:04,730 REALLY WANNA BE AUTHENTIC, YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? 92 00:03:04,770 --> 00:03:05,840 AND I NEED TO HIT THE STREETS 93 00:03:05,870 --> 00:03:07,640 TO GET THE FEEL FOR THIS SHIT. 94 00:03:07,670 --> 00:03:09,410 AND YOU NEED TO BE TAKING SOME FUCKING NOTES, ALL RIGHT? 95 00:03:09,440 --> 00:03:13,910 SO BE THERE OR BE SIX FEET UNDER, MOTHERFUCKER. 96 00:03:17,380 --> 00:03:20,350 [upbeat music] 97 00:03:20,380 --> 00:03:28,330 * 98 00:04:06,800 --> 00:04:07,830 - YOU GOTTA GO. 99 00:04:07,860 --> 00:04:09,530 - I DON'T GOTTA DO NOTHING. 100 00:04:09,570 --> 00:04:11,700 - GOOD GOD, MAN, IT'S A RIDE-ALONG. 101 00:04:11,740 --> 00:04:13,070 AT THE ABSOLUTE WORST, 102 00:04:13,100 --> 00:04:15,000 IT'LL BE AN ABSOLUTE FUCKING BLAST. 103 00:04:15,040 --> 00:04:17,610 - LOOK, SOONER OR LATER THIS GUY'S GONNA FIND 104 00:04:17,640 --> 00:04:18,940 OR FIGURE OUT THAT I'M FUCKING 105 00:04:18,980 --> 00:04:20,710 THE OBJECT OF HIS GANGSTERY AFFECTIONS, 106 00:04:20,740 --> 00:04:22,410 AND WHEN THAT HAPPENS, I'M TOAST. 107 00:04:22,450 --> 00:04:23,910 BLOODY, BULLET-RIDDEN TOAST. 108 00:04:23,950 --> 00:04:25,620 - I STILL THINK YOU SHOULD GO. 109 00:04:25,650 --> 00:04:27,450 - AND I THINK YOU SHOULD BE ON MY SIDE FOR ONCE. 110 00:04:27,480 --> 00:04:28,850 YOU SHOULD BE FOCUSED ON PROTECTING MY ASS, 111 00:04:28,890 --> 00:04:30,090 NOT JUST MY CAREER. 112 00:04:30,120 --> 00:04:32,390 - YOUR CAREER IS JUST FINE, BUDDY-BOY. 113 00:04:32,420 --> 00:04:34,420 YOU ARE THE GUY THAT GOT SANTA MONICA COP 114 00:04:34,460 --> 00:04:35,490 A GREEN LIGHT. 115 00:04:35,530 --> 00:04:36,630 - WOW. 116 00:04:36,660 --> 00:04:37,730 THERE'S A DUBIOUS HONOR. 117 00:04:37,760 --> 00:04:38,830 - DUBIOUS OR NOT, 118 00:04:38,860 --> 00:04:40,030 I GOT SERIOUS INTEREST IN YOU 119 00:04:40,060 --> 00:04:41,700 FOR A WHOLE BUNCH OF PROJECTS. 120 00:04:41,730 --> 00:04:43,500 - THAT'S GREAT. REALLY? 121 00:04:43,530 --> 00:04:44,970 WELL, WHY AM I JUST HEARING ABOUT IT NOW? 122 00:04:45,000 --> 00:04:46,900 WHY JUST AS AN ASIDE? WHAT ARE THEY? 123 00:04:46,940 --> 00:04:48,610 - I DON'T KNOW. 124 00:04:48,640 --> 00:04:50,710 I GOT 'EM WRITTEN DOWN ON A BUCKSLIP SOMEWHERE. 125 00:04:50,740 --> 00:04:53,810 - WORST AGENT EVER. 126 00:04:53,840 --> 00:04:56,450 - I'LL TELL YOU WHAT, I WILL GO WITH YOU. 127 00:04:56,480 --> 00:04:57,980 KEEP YOU OUT OF HARM'S WAY. 128 00:04:58,010 --> 00:05:00,120 I WILL BE YOUR HUMAN KEVLAR. 129 00:05:00,150 --> 00:05:02,520 IT'S NO PROBLEM, NONE AT ALL. 130 00:05:02,550 --> 00:05:05,460 THAT'S JUST THE KIND OF SERVICE YOU GET FOR YOUR 10%. 131 00:05:05,490 --> 00:05:07,660 - BULLSHIT, YOU JUST WANNA RIDE IN THE POLICE CAR. 132 00:05:07,690 --> 00:05:09,930 - EVER SINCE I WAS A LITTLE BOY. 133 00:05:09,960 --> 00:05:11,460 - YOU'RE HERE, YOU'RE QUEER, AND I'M USED TO IT, 134 00:05:11,500 --> 00:05:12,530 BUT YOU'RE NOT INVITED. 135 00:05:12,560 --> 00:05:14,460 - BUT I COULD BE, RIGHT? 136 00:05:14,500 --> 00:05:15,470 I COULD TAG ALONG 137 00:05:15,500 --> 00:05:17,100 FOR THE RIDE-ALONG. 138 00:05:17,130 --> 00:05:20,800 - I FEEL LIKE CRUSHING ONE OF YOUR TESTICLES RIGHT NOW. 139 00:05:20,840 --> 00:05:23,710 - DOES THAT MEAN I CAN GO? 140 00:05:26,540 --> 00:05:27,710 - FINE, LET'S GO, POWDER. 141 00:05:27,740 --> 00:05:29,380 - [exclaims] 142 00:05:29,410 --> 00:05:31,050 - I HOPE YOU GET KILLED IN THE LINE OF DUTY. 143 00:05:38,520 --> 00:05:40,020 THIS FEELS UNNATURAL TO ME, 144 00:05:40,060 --> 00:05:42,490 VOLUNTARILY ARRIVING AT A POLICE STATION. 145 00:05:42,530 --> 00:05:43,660 - [sniffs] I LIKE IT. 146 00:05:43,690 --> 00:05:45,030 SMELLS LIKE CRIME, PUNISHMENT, 147 00:05:45,060 --> 00:05:46,600 AND THE URINE OF HOMELESS MEN AND WOMEN. 148 00:05:46,630 --> 00:05:50,030 - WHERE IS THAT FUCKING LUNATIC? 149 00:05:50,070 --> 00:05:51,700 - HANDS BEHIND YOUR BACK, MOTHERFUCKER. 150 00:05:51,740 --> 00:05:53,640 'CAUSE YOU UNDER ARREST. - WHAT THE FUCK FOR? 151 00:05:53,670 --> 00:05:57,610 - FOR JERKING OFF ON THE JOB, DR. EVIL! 152 00:05:57,640 --> 00:06:00,080 - WHAT THE FUCK? 153 00:06:00,110 --> 00:06:01,810 - I SCARED THE SHIT OUT YOU. 154 00:06:01,850 --> 00:06:03,650 - HEY, HEY, DO YOUR RUNKLE IMITATION 155 00:06:03,680 --> 00:06:06,420 FOR RUNKLE HIMSELF. CHECK IT OUT. 156 00:06:06,450 --> 00:06:08,620 - [grunting] 157 00:06:08,650 --> 00:06:10,190 - HUH? 158 00:06:10,220 --> 00:06:11,920 - I DON'T SEE WHAT'S SO FUNNY ABOUT THAT. 159 00:06:11,960 --> 00:06:13,520 IT'S NOT EVEN REALISTIC. 160 00:06:13,560 --> 00:06:16,530 DID YOU WATCH THE VIDEO? IT WAS MORE LIKE THIS. 161 00:06:16,560 --> 00:06:17,860 WHOO! 162 00:06:17,890 --> 00:06:18,900 - THAT'S TRUE. 163 00:06:18,930 --> 00:06:20,800 - [sighs] COMMANDO. 164 00:06:20,830 --> 00:06:21,800 - HEY, WHAT THE FUCK HE DOING HERE, MAN? 165 00:06:21,830 --> 00:06:23,070 I DIDN'T INVITE HIM. 166 00:06:23,100 --> 00:06:24,800 - FUCKER INVITED HIMSELF. TELL HIM. 167 00:06:24,830 --> 00:06:27,040 - I ALWAYS WANTED TO RIDE IN A COP CAR. 168 00:06:27,070 --> 00:06:28,770 IT'S A BOYHOOD DREAM, ACTUALLY. 169 00:06:28,810 --> 00:06:30,140 - WELL, KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT 170 00:06:30,170 --> 00:06:31,680 AND YOUR DICK IN YOUR PANTS, A'IGHT? 171 00:06:31,710 --> 00:06:33,010 - A'IGHT. 172 00:06:33,040 --> 00:06:34,540 - A'IGHT. - A'IGHT. 173 00:06:34,580 --> 00:06:36,450 - SHOTGUN. 174 00:06:36,480 --> 00:06:39,450 [rock music] 175 00:06:39,480 --> 00:06:41,520 - * COME ON, PUT 'EM UP, PUT 'EM UP * 176 00:06:41,550 --> 00:06:42,950 - SO THIS IS IT, BOYS. 177 00:06:42,990 --> 00:06:45,560 WELCOME TO THE JUNGLE. TAKE A WHIFF. 178 00:06:45,590 --> 00:06:48,220 - [sniffs] - SORRY, THAT WAS ME. 179 00:06:48,260 --> 00:06:50,030 HEY, LOOK, I'LL BE HONEST WITH YOU, 180 00:06:50,060 --> 00:06:51,760 THERE'S NOT A WHOLE LOT OF GLAMOUR TO THE PROFESSION. 181 00:06:51,800 --> 00:06:53,560 - ARE YOU KIDDING? THIS IS FUCKING AWESOME. 182 00:06:53,600 --> 00:06:54,930 CAN I TURN THIS LIGHT ON? 183 00:06:54,960 --> 00:06:56,570 - NO. - CAN I PULL SOMEONE OVER? 184 00:06:56,600 --> 00:06:57,900 - AND STOP TOUCHING STUFF. 185 00:06:57,930 --> 00:06:59,500 COME ON, MAN, YOU'RE LIKE A BIG BABY. 186 00:06:59,540 --> 00:07:01,200 - HEY, THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I ALWAYS SAY. 187 00:07:01,240 --> 00:07:02,970 - ANY AVAILABLE UNIT IN THE VICINITY OF PICO AND 23RD, 188 00:07:03,010 --> 00:07:04,470 POSSIBLE "B" AND "E" IN PROGRESS. 189 00:07:04,510 --> 00:07:06,040 - AIN'T YOU GONNA GET THAT, MAN? 190 00:07:06,080 --> 00:07:07,610 THAT SHIT'S CLOSE BY. 191 00:07:07,640 --> 00:07:09,850 - NAH, SOMEBODY WILL GET IT. 192 00:07:09,880 --> 00:07:11,580 EVENTUALLY. 193 00:07:11,620 --> 00:07:12,980 SOUNDS PRETTY UNPLEASANT. 194 00:07:13,020 --> 00:07:15,490 BESIDES, I GOTTA BABYSIT YOU BED WETTERS. 195 00:07:15,520 --> 00:07:18,250 SO WHAT'S THIS MOVIE ABOUT? 196 00:07:18,290 --> 00:07:20,960 - IT'S ABOUT HOLLYWOOD'S NEED TO RECYCLE 197 00:07:20,990 --> 00:07:25,260 EVEN THE LAMEST IDEAS IN AN EFFORT TO MAXIMIZE... 198 00:07:25,290 --> 00:07:26,600 STUFF. 199 00:07:26,630 --> 00:07:27,930 I DON'T KNOW. I'M OUT. 200 00:07:27,960 --> 00:07:28,930 I GOT NOTHING. - SHUT THE FUCK UP, MOODY. 201 00:07:28,970 --> 00:07:30,770 YOU'RE TOO CYNICAL, MAN. 202 00:07:30,800 --> 00:07:32,000 YOU NEED TO LOOK AT THE WORLD THROUGH THE EYES OF A CHILD 203 00:07:32,040 --> 00:07:34,000 LIKE RUNKLE HERE. 204 00:07:34,040 --> 00:07:35,670 - OOH. - HEY, YO. 205 00:07:35,710 --> 00:07:36,970 IT'S ABOUT A TOUGH KID WHO GREW UP IN COMPTON, 206 00:07:37,010 --> 00:07:38,540 BECOMES A COP, 207 00:07:38,580 --> 00:07:39,940 GETS TRANSFERRED OVER TO SANTA MONICA, 208 00:07:39,980 --> 00:07:42,110 AND USES HIS STREET SMARTS TO FUCK UP WHITEY. 209 00:07:42,150 --> 00:07:44,250 - SO IT'S LIKE BEVERLY HILLS COP. 210 00:07:44,280 --> 00:07:45,720 - YOU ARE CORRECT, SIR. 211 00:07:45,750 --> 00:07:47,020 - EVERYBODY KEEPS SAYING THAT SHIT. 212 00:07:47,050 --> 00:07:48,890 NAH, MAN, IT'S BASED IN SANTA MONICA. 213 00:07:48,920 --> 00:07:50,150 - YEAH, IT'S SET IN SANTA MONICA. 214 00:07:50,190 --> 00:07:53,560 - HEY, HEY, HEY, MR. OFFICER, SIR, 215 00:07:53,590 --> 00:07:55,160 THAT GUY IS CLEARLY TEXTING WHILE DRIVING. 216 00:07:55,190 --> 00:07:57,690 LET'S GET HIM. - WHO GIVES A FUCK? 217 00:07:57,730 --> 00:07:59,300 WHO DOESN'T? I DO IT ALL THE TIME. 218 00:07:59,330 --> 00:08:00,530 I'D BE A HYPOCRITE IF I PULLED SOMEBODY OVER 219 00:08:00,560 --> 00:08:01,870 FOR THAT SHIT. 220 00:08:01,900 --> 00:08:03,670 YOU IMAGINE GETTING PULLED OVER FOR TEXTING? 221 00:08:03,700 --> 00:08:04,800 WOULDN'T THAT JUST CHAP YOUR FUCKING HIDE? 222 00:08:04,830 --> 00:08:06,300 - FUCK, MAN. 223 00:08:06,340 --> 00:08:08,810 - WHAT'S YOUR TAKE ON DRUNK DRIVING, OFFICER? 224 00:08:08,840 --> 00:08:09,910 - YEAH, THAT'S A GOOD QUESTION, RIGHT? 225 00:08:09,940 --> 00:08:10,940 - THANK YOU. 226 00:08:10,970 --> 00:08:12,140 - THAT DEPENDS REALLY, 227 00:08:12,180 --> 00:08:13,740 MOSTLY ON THE CUT OF THEIR JIB. 228 00:08:13,780 --> 00:08:16,610 IF THE GUY'S A REAL D-BAG, HIS ASS IS MINE. 229 00:08:16,650 --> 00:08:18,110 HE IS GOING DOWN. 230 00:08:18,150 --> 00:08:20,120 AND THE SAME THING FOR A HOT CHICK. 231 00:08:20,150 --> 00:08:21,590 DOWN ON THIS. 232 00:08:21,620 --> 00:08:23,050 - OH-HO! ALL RIGHT. 233 00:08:23,090 --> 00:08:24,720 GET A LOAD OF BAD LIEUTENANT. 234 00:08:24,750 --> 00:08:26,290 - HEY, YO, YOU EVER SHOOT A MOTHERFUCKER BEFORE? 235 00:08:26,320 --> 00:08:27,860 - JUST ONCE. 236 00:08:27,890 --> 00:08:29,230 KIND OF A SAD STORY, ACTUALLY. 237 00:08:29,260 --> 00:08:30,730 IT WAS A LITTLE KID. 238 00:08:30,760 --> 00:08:32,000 I MEAN, I THOUGHT THE KID HAD A PIECE. 239 00:08:32,030 --> 00:08:35,800 TURNS OUT IT WAS AN IPOD TOUCH. 240 00:08:35,830 --> 00:08:37,000 - BET HE WAS BLACK. WAS HE BLACK? 241 00:08:37,030 --> 00:08:38,100 - WAS HE BLACK? 242 00:08:38,130 --> 00:08:39,200 - OF COURSE HE WAS BLACK. 243 00:08:39,240 --> 00:08:41,200 WHY DO YOU THINK I SHOT FIRST? 244 00:08:41,240 --> 00:08:42,940 [laughs] - THIS NIGGA, MAN. 245 00:08:42,970 --> 00:08:45,340 COP OR NO COP, MAN, HE PULL THIS FUCKING CAR OVER, 246 00:08:45,370 --> 00:08:47,180 I'M GONNA BITCH-SMACK THAT MOTHERFUCKER. 247 00:08:47,210 --> 00:08:48,210 - CHURCH. 248 00:08:48,240 --> 00:08:49,210 - [whimpers] 249 00:08:49,250 --> 00:08:50,680 - HEY, RUNKS, 250 00:08:50,710 --> 00:08:51,780 GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER, MAN. 251 00:08:51,820 --> 00:08:53,220 - UH, I'M SORRY. 252 00:08:53,250 --> 00:08:55,020 I WAS JUST--I WAS THINKING ABOUT LITTLE STEWIE. 253 00:08:55,050 --> 00:08:56,850 HE'S ALWAYS PLAYING WITH HIS IPOD TOUCH. 254 00:08:56,890 --> 00:08:58,220 HE'S GOT THIS APP ON IT 255 00:08:58,250 --> 00:08:59,690 THAT MAKES IT SOUND LIKE A GUN, YOU KNOW? 256 00:08:59,720 --> 00:09:00,960 HE USED TO LOVE TO POINT IT AT IRMA 257 00:09:00,990 --> 00:09:02,290 AND PRETEND TO SHOOT HER IN THE HEAD 258 00:09:02,330 --> 00:09:04,930 EXECUTION STYLE. - THAT'S ADORABLE. 259 00:09:04,960 --> 00:09:06,600 - JESUS, THERE BUT FOR THE GRACE OF GOD, HUH? 260 00:09:06,630 --> 00:09:07,730 - [laughs] 261 00:09:07,760 --> 00:09:10,170 I'M JUST FUCKING WITH YOU MORONS. 262 00:09:10,200 --> 00:09:12,100 NEVER PULLED MY PIECE OUT ON THE JOB. 263 00:09:12,140 --> 00:09:14,370 NEVER. NOT ONCE. 264 00:09:14,400 --> 00:09:17,370 - TOO BAD THE SAME CAN'T BE SAID FOR RUNKS, HUH? 265 00:09:17,410 --> 00:09:18,370 - [chuckles] 266 00:09:18,410 --> 00:09:21,110 [both grunting] 267 00:09:21,140 --> 00:09:23,080 - I DON'T KNOW. 268 00:09:23,110 --> 00:09:26,020 - HEY, HEY, HEY, WHO'S HUNGRY? 269 00:09:33,690 --> 00:09:35,390 - I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS, WE'RE ACTUALLY SITTING AROUND 270 00:09:35,420 --> 00:09:36,860 WATCHING A COP EAT DONUTS. 271 00:09:36,890 --> 00:09:38,360 - I KNOW, IT'S A CLICHE, 272 00:09:38,390 --> 00:09:40,100 BUT THEY'RE SO FUCKING DELICIOUS, YOU KNOW? 273 00:09:40,130 --> 00:09:42,300 PLUS DONUTS GOT SUGAR AND CARBS, 274 00:09:42,330 --> 00:09:44,200 WHICH ALLOWS FOR A QUICK BURST OF ENERGY. 275 00:09:44,230 --> 00:09:45,800 COFFEE KEEPS ME AWAKE AND ALERT. 276 00:09:45,840 --> 00:09:48,740 HOT CALL COMES IN, I'M FUCKING READY. 277 00:09:48,770 --> 00:09:50,240 YOU GETTING ALL THIS, WRITER? 278 00:09:50,270 --> 00:09:51,710 YOU NEED ME TO TALK SLOWER? 279 00:09:51,740 --> 00:09:54,710 - IT'S ALL RIGHT UP HERE. 280 00:09:54,740 --> 00:09:55,980 - FILL 'ER UP, DOTTY. 281 00:09:56,010 --> 00:09:57,650 - THIS SHIT IS FUCKING BORING, YO. 282 00:09:57,680 --> 00:09:59,150 IF I WANT TO SIT AROUND AND EAT DONUTS ALL NIGHT, 283 00:09:59,180 --> 00:10:01,180 I COULDA STAYED HOME AND SMOKED SOME FUCKING WEED, MAN. 284 00:10:01,220 --> 00:10:02,720 - HEY, YOU WANTED TO SEE WHAT A NIGHT 285 00:10:02,750 --> 00:10:03,950 IN THE LIFE OF A COP IS LIKE. 286 00:10:03,990 --> 00:10:05,350 THIS IS IT. I DRIVE AROUND. 287 00:10:05,390 --> 00:10:07,020 I TRY NOT TO GET MYSELF KILLED. 288 00:10:07,060 --> 00:10:08,890 AND I FEED THE PAIN THAT COMES FROM KNOWING 289 00:10:08,930 --> 00:10:11,930 THAT I PUT MY LIFE ON THE LINE NIGHT AFTER FUCKING NIGHT. 290 00:10:11,960 --> 00:10:15,160 THAT AND THE PAIN OF DEALING WITH A MESSY DIVORCE. 291 00:10:15,200 --> 00:10:17,430 BANGING A FUCKING FIREMAN. YOU BELIEVE THAT SHIT? 292 00:10:17,470 --> 00:10:19,940 - CHICK MUST REALLY HAVE A THING FOR GUYS IN UNIFORM. 293 00:10:19,970 --> 00:10:21,100 - YEAH, EVER SINCE 9/11, 294 00:10:21,140 --> 00:10:23,310 FUCKING FIREMEN GET ALL THE PUSSY. 295 00:10:23,340 --> 00:10:26,280 HEY, YOU SEE THAT CHICK RIGHT THERE? 296 00:10:26,310 --> 00:10:27,710 TOTAL PRO. 297 00:10:27,740 --> 00:10:28,950 - WOW, HOW CAN YOU TELL? 298 00:10:28,980 --> 00:10:30,310 - YEARS OF EXPERIENCE, MY FRIEND. 299 00:10:30,350 --> 00:10:32,420 - HEY, HEY, HOW MUCH YOU THINK SHE CHARGES? 300 00:10:32,450 --> 00:10:35,020 - AH, 25 BUCKS WILL GET YOU SOME SUCTION. 301 00:10:35,050 --> 00:10:36,920 GOTTA WEAR A RUBBER THOUGH. 302 00:10:36,950 --> 00:10:39,790 50 BUCKS, SHE'LL LET YOU THROW DELI MEAT AT HER ASS. 303 00:10:39,820 --> 00:10:41,190 75, SHE'LL LET YOU TASE HER. 304 00:10:41,220 --> 00:10:42,430 - WHY WOULD ANYBODY WANT TO DO THAT? 305 00:10:42,460 --> 00:10:44,090 - PEOPLE ARE SICK, MAN. 306 00:10:44,130 --> 00:10:45,190 I'M JUST TELLING YOU WHAT'S ON THE MENU 307 00:10:45,230 --> 00:10:46,460 WITH THESE BROADS. 308 00:10:46,500 --> 00:10:48,870 - HEY, RUNKLE, HOW MUCH TO TASE YOU? 309 00:10:48,900 --> 00:10:50,330 - HEY, HEY, MR. SAMURAI, SIR, 310 00:10:50,370 --> 00:10:52,800 I'VE ACTUALLY BEEN TASED, AND IT IS NO FUN. 311 00:10:52,840 --> 00:10:53,840 - NO, IT IS. - NO FUN AT ALL. 312 00:10:53,870 --> 00:10:55,100 - IT'S FUN. 313 00:10:55,140 --> 00:10:56,470 - THAT SAID, I'D PROBABLY DO IT 314 00:10:56,510 --> 00:10:58,340 FOR A CRISP HUNDY. 315 00:10:58,370 --> 00:11:00,040 - OH, YEAH? ALL RIGHT, I'LL THROW IN. 316 00:11:00,080 --> 00:11:03,450 - EACH. EACH MAYBE. 317 00:11:03,480 --> 00:11:04,810 - AH, SHIT, IT'S HAPPENING! 318 00:11:04,850 --> 00:11:06,050 - WHAT'S HAPPENING? 319 00:11:06,080 --> 00:11:07,380 - MY HEART. ANOTHER FUCKING EPISODE. 320 00:11:07,420 --> 00:11:09,720 GOD DAMN IT! - ARE YOU SURE? 321 00:11:09,750 --> 00:11:12,090 - YEAH, GOT AN INTENSE PAIN IN MY CHEST. 322 00:11:12,120 --> 00:11:13,960 ARMS ARE GOING ALL NUMB. 323 00:11:13,990 --> 00:11:15,290 SOMETHING NOT GOOD IS DEFINITELY HAPPENING 324 00:11:15,320 --> 00:11:16,390 TO MY BODY RIGHT NOW. 325 00:11:16,430 --> 00:11:18,090 I'M STROKING OUT OVER HERE. 326 00:11:18,130 --> 00:11:19,260 YOU GUYS ARE GONNA HAVE TO DRIVE ME 327 00:11:19,300 --> 00:11:20,360 TO THE FUCKING HOSPITAL, OKAY? 328 00:11:20,400 --> 00:11:21,870 - I'M CALLING MY AGENT, MAN. 329 00:11:21,900 --> 00:11:23,830 - I'M RIGHT HERE. - MY NEW AGENT. 330 00:11:23,870 --> 00:11:25,940 - NOW LET'S NOT BE RASH. U.T.K. IS A UNIQUE AGENCY. 331 00:11:25,970 --> 00:11:28,040 OUR ABILITY TO PACKAGE IS UNPARALLELED. 332 00:11:28,070 --> 00:11:29,270 HEY, HANG ON, I'LL TAKE CARE OF THIS, 333 00:11:29,310 --> 00:11:30,510 THEN I'LL TAKE CARE OF YOU. 334 00:11:30,540 --> 00:11:32,880 OKAY, 911 IT IS. 335 00:11:32,910 --> 00:11:34,510 - [groans] 336 00:11:34,540 --> 00:11:36,810 - OKAY, MAN DOWN! 337 00:11:38,920 --> 00:11:41,280 GOD DAMN. 338 00:11:41,320 --> 00:11:43,120 ONE MINUTE, YOU'RE EATING A DONUT, 339 00:11:43,150 --> 00:11:44,790 WAXING ALL POETIC. 340 00:11:44,820 --> 00:11:46,390 THE NEXT YOU'RE STROKING OUT ALL OVER THE FLOOR. 341 00:11:46,420 --> 00:11:48,020 THAT KINDA MAKES YOU THINK, HUH? 342 00:11:48,060 --> 00:11:50,260 - ABOUT LAYING OFF THE DONUTS, SURE. 343 00:11:50,290 --> 00:11:51,860 - THINK HE'S GONNA BE OKAY? 344 00:11:51,900 --> 00:11:53,400 - I DON'T KNOW, HE SEEMED PRETTY TWEAKED. 345 00:11:53,430 --> 00:11:55,130 I DO KNOW THAT HE APPRECIATED YOU HOLDING HIS HAND 346 00:11:55,160 --> 00:11:57,030 THE ENTIRE TIME THOUGH, RUNKS. 347 00:11:57,070 --> 00:11:58,400 - WELL, WHAT DO YOU THINK, SAM? 348 00:11:58,430 --> 00:11:59,800 - I THINK WE SHOULD ADD A STROKE SCENE 349 00:11:59,840 --> 00:12:01,100 TO THE SCRIPT, MAN. - STROKE SCENE? 350 00:12:01,140 --> 00:12:02,170 - I CAN PULL THAT SHIT OFF NO PROBLEM. 351 00:12:02,210 --> 00:12:04,110 [groaning] - OH, YEAH. 352 00:12:04,140 --> 00:12:06,810 YEAH, YEAH, YEAH. NICE. 353 00:12:06,840 --> 00:12:08,910 - WE BEST BE THINKING ABOUT GETTING OURSELVES A CAB, HUH? 354 00:12:08,950 --> 00:12:10,310 OH, WAIT A MINUTE, MAYBE ONE OF YOUR CREW GUYS 355 00:12:10,350 --> 00:12:11,510 CAN COME PICK US UP? 356 00:12:11,550 --> 00:12:12,520 - OH, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH, CALL THE MIDGET. 357 00:12:12,550 --> 00:12:14,020 I LOVE THAT LITTLE DUDE. 358 00:12:14,050 --> 00:12:15,020 - THAT LITTLE NAPPY-HEADED NIGGA, MAN. 359 00:12:15,050 --> 00:12:17,250 - YEAH, MR. LOWERCASE "T." 360 00:12:17,290 --> 00:12:19,860 - NAH, MAN. - OH, NO, NO, NO. 361 00:12:19,890 --> 00:12:21,190 I DON'T THINK THAT'S A VERY GOOD IDEA, SAM. 362 00:12:21,220 --> 00:12:22,790 NO, WE COULD REALLY GET IN A LOT OF TROUBLE. 363 00:12:22,830 --> 00:12:24,160 - FOR WHAT? 364 00:12:24,190 --> 00:12:25,530 JUST GONNA TAKE IT BACK TO THE POLICE STATION. 365 00:12:25,560 --> 00:12:26,900 - CHARLIE, IT'S THE RIGHT THING TO DO. 366 00:12:26,930 --> 00:12:28,260 THE MORAL THING, THE POLITE THING. 367 00:12:28,300 --> 00:12:30,530 - I JUST DON'T WANNA GET IN ANY TROUBLE. 368 00:12:30,570 --> 00:12:32,040 - WHAT'S UP, ADAM-12? 369 00:12:32,070 --> 00:12:33,040 I THOUGHT IT WAS YOUR BOYHOOD FUCKING DREAM 370 00:12:33,070 --> 00:12:34,270 TO RIDE IN A POLICE CAR. 371 00:12:34,300 --> 00:12:36,140 - AND I HAVE FULFILLED THAT DREAM. 372 00:12:36,170 --> 00:12:39,340 NOW IT'S TIME WE SHOULD ALL GO HOME AND REFLECT. 373 00:12:39,380 --> 00:12:41,480 - SHOTGUN! 374 00:12:41,510 --> 00:12:43,880 - HEY, GUYS, WHERE YOU GOING? 375 00:12:43,910 --> 00:12:45,380 WHE-- 376 00:12:45,410 --> 00:12:48,450 YOU'RE JUST GONNA LEAVE ME HERE, IS THAT IT? 377 00:12:48,480 --> 00:12:50,450 YEP, IT LOOKS LIKE YOU'RE JUST GONNA LEAVE WITHOUT ME. 378 00:12:50,490 --> 00:12:53,960 OKAY, OKAY, I'M COMING. CAN I DRIVE, HUH? 379 00:12:53,990 --> 00:12:55,490 - * CAN'T STOP NOW 380 00:12:55,520 --> 00:12:57,330 * HOLD THE CHAINS AND THE HARNESSES * 381 00:12:57,360 --> 00:12:59,930 * GET DOWN TO LAKE TOWN, 'CAUSE CAN'T STOP NOW * 382 00:12:59,960 --> 00:13:01,500 * 383 00:13:01,530 --> 00:13:03,300 - COULD HAVE AT LEAST LET ME SIT IN THE FRONT. 384 00:13:03,330 --> 00:13:04,600 - I CALLED SHOTGUN. 385 00:13:04,630 --> 00:13:05,970 - THERE'S NOTHING TO DO BACK HERE. 386 00:13:06,000 --> 00:13:07,370 - SHUT THE FUCK UP, RUNKLE. 387 00:13:07,400 --> 00:13:09,170 YOU'RE LIKE A SMALL CHILD BACK THERE, MAN, 388 00:13:09,210 --> 00:13:10,610 AND IT'S PISSING ME THE FUCK OFF. 389 00:13:10,640 --> 00:13:12,510 - BORING. 390 00:13:12,540 --> 00:13:15,340 - THIS MOTHERFUCKER DRIVING ALL FUCKING SLOW. 391 00:13:15,380 --> 00:13:16,610 WATCH THIS, WATCH THIS. 392 00:13:16,650 --> 00:13:20,480 [siren blares] 393 00:13:20,520 --> 00:13:22,590 [laughs] POW, MOTHERFUCKER! 394 00:13:22,620 --> 00:13:24,490 - EXCUSE ME, 395 00:13:24,520 --> 00:13:28,360 BUT, UM, I REALLY THINK WE'RE PLAYING WITH FIRE HERE NOW, SAM. 396 00:13:28,390 --> 00:13:30,060 I DON'T KNOW IF YOU'RE AWARE, 397 00:13:30,090 --> 00:13:32,460 BUT--BUT HANK HAS ONLY RECENTLY FINISHED HIS PROBATION. 398 00:13:32,500 --> 00:13:33,960 SO-- 399 00:13:34,000 --> 00:13:35,400 - FOR WHAT, BEING A FUCKING RAPIST? 400 00:13:35,430 --> 00:13:38,230 - HEY, STOP IT WITH ALL THAT RAPIST SHIT, OKAY? 401 00:13:38,270 --> 00:13:40,000 I'M SENSITIVE ABOUT THAT. 402 00:13:40,040 --> 00:13:41,570 - COME ON, MAN, I SAY THAT SHIT WITH LOVE, MAN. 403 00:13:41,600 --> 00:13:43,110 THAT'S WHAT I LIKE ABOUT YOU, MAN. 404 00:13:43,140 --> 00:13:45,140 YOU'RE AN OUTLAW, MAN. TRUTH. 405 00:13:45,170 --> 00:13:47,180 - BONG, BONG. - BONG, BONG. 406 00:13:47,210 --> 00:13:48,980 - I PREFER RAPER... 407 00:13:49,010 --> 00:13:50,180 TO RAPIST. 408 00:13:50,210 --> 00:13:51,310 [cell phone rings] - OH, SHIT. 409 00:13:51,350 --> 00:13:53,520 GRAB THE WHEEL FOR ME. 410 00:13:53,550 --> 00:13:55,080 - OH! 411 00:13:55,120 --> 00:13:56,520 - YEAH. 412 00:13:56,550 --> 00:13:59,220 - YEAH, YOU PROBABLY WANT TO PUT THAT ON SPEAKER. 413 00:13:59,260 --> 00:14:01,520 FINE, HAVE IT YOUR WAY. - YO, WHAT UP, MAN? 414 00:14:01,560 --> 00:14:03,030 WHAT? 415 00:14:03,060 --> 00:14:04,960 NO, SINGED FOR NOTHIN'. FUCK THAT. 416 00:14:04,990 --> 00:14:07,260 I'LL BE RIGHT THERE. - BE RIGHT WHERE? 417 00:14:07,300 --> 00:14:08,660 - MY BOY SAW KALI UP IN THE CLUB 418 00:14:08,700 --> 00:14:11,070 GETTING COZY WITH SOME CLOWN-ASS NIGGA, MAN. 419 00:14:11,100 --> 00:14:13,140 - WELL, WE'RE GOING BACK TO THE POLICE STATION FIRST, RIGHT? 420 00:14:13,170 --> 00:14:14,270 YOU'RE GONNA DROP US OFF. 421 00:14:14,300 --> 00:14:16,140 - SOMETHING TELLS ME NO. 422 00:14:16,170 --> 00:14:19,280 - FUCK THAT, YOU GOTTA STRIKE WHEN THE IRON FIST IS HOT. 423 00:14:19,310 --> 00:14:21,480 - YEAH, BUT WHAT IF SOMETHING BAD GOES DOWN? 424 00:14:21,510 --> 00:14:23,410 YOU DON'T WANT ANY WITNESSES AROUND, DO YOU? 425 00:14:23,450 --> 00:14:25,010 - NO, I DO WANT WITNESSES, MAN, 426 00:14:25,050 --> 00:14:26,350 ESPECIALLY SOME WHITE MOTHERFUCKERS, MAN. 427 00:14:26,380 --> 00:14:28,020 - OH, WHY, 'CAUSE WE'RE WHITE? 428 00:14:28,050 --> 00:14:29,220 - YEAH, 'CAUSE YOU WHITE, MOTHERFUCKER. 429 00:14:29,250 --> 00:14:30,950 COPS BELIEVE WHITE MOTHERFUCKERS. 430 00:14:30,990 --> 00:14:32,960 YOU GOT MY BACK, RIGHT? Y'ALL GOT MY BACK, RIGHT? 431 00:14:32,990 --> 00:14:35,460 YOU'D LIE FOR ME, RIGHT? 432 00:14:35,490 --> 00:14:36,930 - NOT IF IT'S AGAINST THE LAW. 433 00:14:36,960 --> 00:14:39,300 - YOU LIE FOR A LIVING, MOTHERFUCKER. 434 00:14:39,330 --> 00:14:41,060 - MAN'S GOT A POINT. 435 00:14:41,100 --> 00:14:42,400 - * CAN'T STOP NOW 436 00:14:42,430 --> 00:14:44,330 * WE WILL FIRE LIKE AN ARSONIST * 437 00:14:44,370 --> 00:14:46,040 * NOT A FORCE TO BE BARGAINED WITH * 438 00:14:46,070 --> 00:14:47,170 * AIN'T STOPPED US 439 00:14:47,200 --> 00:14:48,440 * WON'T STOP US 440 00:14:48,470 --> 00:14:51,010 * CAN'T STOP US NOW 441 00:15:11,160 --> 00:15:13,430 - OFFICER, I THINK SOMEONE'S FOLLOWING ME. 442 00:15:13,460 --> 00:15:15,060 FEEL LIKE I'M IN DANGER. 443 00:15:15,100 --> 00:15:16,700 - GET THE FUCK OUTTA HERE, STREETWALKER. 444 00:15:16,730 --> 00:15:18,370 CAN'T YOU SEE WE'RE WORKING, MAN? 445 00:15:18,400 --> 00:15:20,300 WE ON A STAKEOUT. - NO, THAT'S NOT NICE. 446 00:15:20,340 --> 00:15:21,700 THE LADY SAYS SHE'S IN DANGER. 447 00:15:21,740 --> 00:15:25,170 - YOU JUST WANT A FREE HUMMER, DON'T YOU? 448 00:15:25,210 --> 00:15:28,110 - COME ON INSIDE HERE, SWEETHEART. 449 00:15:28,140 --> 00:15:29,550 THAT'S THE WAY YOU TREAT A LADY. 450 00:15:29,580 --> 00:15:32,420 - THANK YOU. OOH, MY DOGS ARE BARKING. 451 00:15:32,450 --> 00:15:34,480 - AWW. HOW'S BUSINESS TONIGHT? 452 00:15:34,520 --> 00:15:36,550 - IT'S A LITTLE SLOW, ACTUALLY. 453 00:15:36,590 --> 00:15:37,990 - THERE SHE IS. 454 00:15:38,020 --> 00:15:41,220 - ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT, WHAT DO YOU SAY 455 00:15:41,260 --> 00:15:42,760 WE JUST--WE LEAVE THE CAR OUT OF THIS 456 00:15:42,790 --> 00:15:44,360 AND WE PROCEED ON FOOT. 457 00:15:44,390 --> 00:15:45,530 - STOP WORRYING ABOUT THE GOD DAMN CAR, 458 00:15:45,560 --> 00:15:47,160 YOU FUCKING NINNY. 459 00:15:47,200 --> 00:15:49,330 [starts car] 460 00:15:58,610 --> 00:16:00,240 CAN I DO IT? 461 00:16:00,280 --> 00:16:01,640 - FUCK YEAH, GO FOR IT. [sirens blare] 462 00:16:01,680 --> 00:16:03,210 - HOW COME HE GETS TO DO IT? 463 00:16:03,250 --> 00:16:05,610 - 'CAUSE I LIKE HIM BETTER, MAN. 464 00:16:05,650 --> 00:16:09,350 - THAT'S RIGHT, WE'RE PULLING YOU OVER, MOTHERFUCKER. 465 00:16:09,390 --> 00:16:10,520 PULL OVER TO THE RIGHT. 466 00:16:10,550 --> 00:16:12,590 WHAT ARE YOU, STUPID? 467 00:16:12,620 --> 00:16:14,120 YOUR OTHER RIGHT, JACKASS. 468 00:16:14,160 --> 00:16:15,620 THERE YOU GO. 469 00:16:27,140 --> 00:16:28,370 SO WHAT'S THE MOVE HERE, 470 00:16:28,400 --> 00:16:30,810 GOOD COP, BAD COP, BALD COP? 471 00:16:30,840 --> 00:16:32,480 - NO, HOW 'BOUT BAD COP, BAD COP, 472 00:16:32,510 --> 00:16:34,440 BALD COP STAYS IN THE FUCKING CAR? 473 00:16:34,480 --> 00:16:36,680 - WORKS FOR ME. 474 00:16:44,750 --> 00:16:47,320 - THAT WAS SWEET OF YOU TO LET ME IN. 475 00:16:47,360 --> 00:16:49,390 GIVE ME SHELTER FROM THE STORM. 476 00:16:49,430 --> 00:16:51,130 - IT'S NOTHING. 477 00:16:51,160 --> 00:16:55,730 WHO LIKES TO SEE A LADY IN DANGER? 478 00:16:55,760 --> 00:16:57,630 NOT THIS COP. 479 00:16:57,670 --> 00:16:59,700 LIEUTENANT CHARLES W. RUNKLE. 480 00:16:59,740 --> 00:17:01,170 NICE TO MEET YOU. 481 00:17:01,200 --> 00:17:05,310 - NICE TO MEET YOU TOO, OFFICER. 482 00:17:05,340 --> 00:17:07,680 SO YOU A DETECTIVE? - MM-HMM, YEP. 483 00:17:07,710 --> 00:17:09,210 I LIKE TO TAKE A COUPLE OF THE ROOKIES 484 00:17:09,250 --> 00:17:10,750 OUT ON A 5-8-7 NOW AND AGAIN, 485 00:17:10,780 --> 00:17:12,550 MAKE SURE THEY KNOW THEIR SHIT. 486 00:17:12,580 --> 00:17:15,380 IT'S JUST GOOD OLD-FASHIONED POLICE WORK. 487 00:17:15,420 --> 00:17:17,820 - WELL, HOW 'BOUT A GOOD OLD-FASHIONED BLOWJOB? 488 00:17:17,850 --> 00:17:19,460 THIS ONE'S ON ME, 489 00:17:19,490 --> 00:17:25,330 'CAUSE YOU'RE AN OFFICER AND A GENTLEMAN. 490 00:17:25,360 --> 00:17:28,260 [unzips pants] 491 00:17:28,300 --> 00:17:29,770 - OHH! 492 00:17:29,800 --> 00:17:32,270 - OUT OF THE CAR, MA'AM. 493 00:17:32,300 --> 00:17:35,470 - HANK. 494 00:17:35,500 --> 00:17:37,770 - LICENSE AND REGISTRATION, MOTHERFUCKER. 495 00:17:37,810 --> 00:17:39,380 COME ON, LOOK ALIVE. 496 00:17:39,410 --> 00:17:40,880 - WHAT THE FUCK? 497 00:17:40,910 --> 00:17:43,610 - HE'S REALLY PISSED. HE MISSES YOU. 498 00:17:43,650 --> 00:17:44,810 - YOU KNOW, THIS IS WHY I MOVED OUT OF HIS PLACE, 499 00:17:44,850 --> 00:17:46,320 BECAUSE HE IS A FUCKING PSYCHO. 500 00:17:46,350 --> 00:17:48,220 - YEAH, BUT WE GOT TO TALK ABOUT THIS, 501 00:17:48,250 --> 00:17:49,390 'CAUSE SOONER OR LATER HE'S GONNA FIND OUT ABOUT US. 502 00:17:49,420 --> 00:17:50,890 - HOW? I'M NOT GONNA TELL HIM. 503 00:17:50,920 --> 00:17:51,890 ARE YOU GONNA TELL HIM? 504 00:17:51,920 --> 00:17:53,320 - NO FUCKING WAY. 505 00:17:53,360 --> 00:17:54,590 - SO WE DON'T HAVE A PROBLEM. 506 00:17:54,620 --> 00:17:55,890 - YEAH. 507 00:17:55,920 --> 00:17:57,560 NOW I KNOW WHERE THE FUCK YOU LIVE AT. 508 00:17:57,590 --> 00:17:59,400 GET OUT THE CAR. 509 00:17:59,430 --> 00:18:01,230 - HE'S REALLY KIND OF SWEET IN A WAY. 510 00:18:01,260 --> 00:18:03,530 - HANK, I KNOW YOU THINK HE'S ALL WARM AND CUDDLY. 511 00:18:03,570 --> 00:18:04,770 - OH, NO, I DON'T. 512 00:18:04,800 --> 00:18:05,830 - I'M JUST SAYING WATCH YOURSELF. 513 00:18:05,870 --> 00:18:07,640 - I AM WATCHING MYSELF. 514 00:18:07,670 --> 00:18:10,770 I TRY TO GET OUT, BUT HE PULLS ME BACK IN WITH THE MONEY. 515 00:18:10,810 --> 00:18:13,240 AND, UH, THE MONEY. 516 00:18:13,280 --> 00:18:16,250 AND--AND, OH, THE EXCEPTIONAL WEED. 517 00:18:16,280 --> 00:18:19,150 AND, WOW, YOU LOOK REALLY HOT TONIGHT. 518 00:18:19,180 --> 00:18:21,450 YOU KNOW, I'M THINKING MAYBE I SHOULD HANDCUFF YOU 519 00:18:21,480 --> 00:18:24,550 JUST TO BE SAFE. 520 00:18:24,590 --> 00:18:25,920 - WHAT WAS I DOING WRONG, OFFICER? 521 00:18:25,950 --> 00:18:27,620 - YOU TELL ME. 522 00:18:27,660 --> 00:18:31,660 TURN AROUND. 523 00:18:31,690 --> 00:18:33,800 YOU BEEN DRINKING? - NO, SIR, NOT AT ALL. 524 00:18:33,830 --> 00:18:36,230 - NOT AT ALL? BULLSHIT. 525 00:18:36,270 --> 00:18:38,370 YOU WAS AT THE CLUB, WASN'T YOU? 526 00:18:38,400 --> 00:18:40,800 STEP OVER THERE. 527 00:18:40,840 --> 00:18:42,810 [sniffs] 528 00:18:42,840 --> 00:18:44,670 SOMETHING SMELL FUNKY TO ME, NIGGA. 529 00:18:44,710 --> 00:18:45,810 SMELL LIKE PUSSY. 530 00:18:45,840 --> 00:18:47,280 YOU BEEN DRINKING PUSSY? 531 00:18:47,310 --> 00:18:49,180 - NO. - NO WHAT? 532 00:18:49,210 --> 00:18:51,810 - NO, I HAVEN'T BEEN DRINKING PUSSY, OFFICER. 533 00:18:51,850 --> 00:18:53,750 - WHAT, THIS GIRL PUSSY AIN'T GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU TO DRINK? 534 00:18:53,780 --> 00:18:56,790 - I'M SURE SHE GOT A VERY DRINKABLE PUSSY. 535 00:18:56,820 --> 00:18:58,650 WE JUST HAVEN'T GOTTEN THERE YET. 536 00:18:58,690 --> 00:19:00,390 - THINK YOU GONNA GET THERE? 537 00:19:00,420 --> 00:19:02,430 - I THINK I CAN CLOSE THIS, YEAH. 538 00:19:02,460 --> 00:19:03,830 - THINK YOU CAN CLOSE THIS. 539 00:19:03,860 --> 00:19:05,890 WHAT IF SHE'S SOMEBODY ELSE'S GIRL? 540 00:19:05,930 --> 00:19:09,330 - THEN I SAY THAT THAT SOMEONE ELSE IN QUESTION 541 00:19:09,370 --> 00:19:12,440 ISN'T DOING A GOOD JOB MAKING HER HAPPY. 542 00:19:12,470 --> 00:19:15,970 - IS THAT WHAT YOU SAY, NIGGA? 543 00:19:16,000 --> 00:19:17,410 - AHH! 544 00:19:17,440 --> 00:19:18,840 - CALVIN, WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING? 545 00:19:18,870 --> 00:19:20,710 - THIS MOTHERFUCKER DISRESPECTING BOTH OF US. 546 00:19:20,740 --> 00:19:23,310 - WAIT, YOU KNOW THIS GUY? - YOU WANT ME TO CALL 911 547 00:19:23,350 --> 00:19:24,350 SO THAT YOU CAN DEAL WITH THE REAL COPS? 548 00:19:24,380 --> 00:19:25,810 - FUCK THAT. 549 00:19:25,850 --> 00:19:27,320 LOOK, I WANT YOU TO COME HOME WITH ME, A'IGHT? 550 00:19:27,350 --> 00:19:29,620 FORGET ALL THIS BULLSHIT. - FUCK YOU. 551 00:19:29,650 --> 00:19:30,920 - WAIT A SECOND, YOU AIN'T A REAL COP? 552 00:19:30,950 --> 00:19:32,720 SHIT, YOU COULD HAVE FOOLED ME. 553 00:19:32,760 --> 00:19:34,460 - I'M GONNA TAKE THAT AS A COMPLIMENT, MOTHERFUCKER. 554 00:19:34,490 --> 00:19:36,330 I AIN'T GONNA APOLOGIZE FOR FUCKING YOUR LEGS UP. 555 00:19:36,360 --> 00:19:37,490 I KNOW WHERE THE FUCK YOU LIVE. 556 00:19:37,530 --> 00:19:39,360 KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF MY BITCH. 557 00:19:39,400 --> 00:19:40,660 - WAIT A SECOND. 558 00:19:40,700 --> 00:19:42,670 AREN'T YOU SAMURAI APOCALYPSE? 559 00:19:42,700 --> 00:19:44,900 - OH, SHIT. - NO SHIT. 560 00:19:44,930 --> 00:19:46,670 OH, SHIT! 561 00:19:46,700 --> 00:19:49,770 - GOD, YOU GIVE AN EXCEPTIONAL BLOWJOB. 562 00:19:49,810 --> 00:19:53,340 I MEAN, SERIOUSLY. 563 00:19:53,380 --> 00:19:56,350 SOMETHING TO BE SAID FOR PUTTING IN THE TIME. 564 00:19:56,380 --> 00:19:58,750 AHH! 565 00:19:58,780 --> 00:20:00,480 HAVE YOU READ OUTLIERS? 566 00:20:00,520 --> 00:20:02,550 - MM-MM. - MALCOLM GLADWELL. 567 00:20:02,590 --> 00:20:06,590 HE CLAIMS THAT THE SECRET TO SUCCESS IN ANY FIELD 568 00:20:06,620 --> 00:20:08,320 IS A SIMPLE MATTER 569 00:20:08,360 --> 00:20:10,760 OF PRACTICING A SPECIFIC TASK 570 00:20:10,790 --> 00:20:14,900 FOR, MMM, ABOUT 10,000 HOURS. 571 00:20:14,930 --> 00:20:17,730 [moaning] 572 00:20:25,370 --> 00:20:26,640 - WHAT, YOU WANNA SUCK MY DICK NOW? 573 00:20:26,680 --> 00:20:28,640 - WHAT? 574 00:20:28,680 --> 00:20:30,480 - YOU WANT ME TO TAKE MINE OUT? 575 00:20:30,510 --> 00:20:32,620 WANT ME TO PUT IT IN YOUR MOUTH? 576 00:20:32,650 --> 00:20:34,780 - YOUR DICK? 577 00:20:34,820 --> 00:20:39,460 [moaning] 578 00:20:39,490 --> 00:20:42,960 [screaming] 579 00:20:45,330 --> 00:20:47,600 [screaming, whimpering] 580 00:20:47,630 --> 00:20:50,570 [crying] 581 00:20:53,100 --> 00:20:54,800 - BUCK UP, BUDDY-BOY. 582 00:20:54,840 --> 00:20:57,470 IT DOESN'T MATTER. YOU DIDN'T KNOW. 583 00:20:57,510 --> 00:20:58,870 IT DOESN'T COUNT. 584 00:20:58,910 --> 00:21:00,540 - DID YOU KNOW? 585 00:21:00,580 --> 00:21:01,580 - OF COURSE. DIDN'T YOU KNOW? 586 00:21:01,610 --> 00:21:02,950 - FUCK YEAH. 587 00:21:02,980 --> 00:21:04,410 SEEN THE SIZE OF THAT ADAM'S APPLE? 588 00:21:04,450 --> 00:21:05,710 - [sobs] 589 00:21:05,750 --> 00:21:06,950 - SHIT, DO I LOOK IGNORANT TO YOU? 590 00:21:06,980 --> 00:21:08,620 - NO, NO, YOU LOOK LIKE A GUY 591 00:21:08,650 --> 00:21:10,590 WHO COULD SPOT A TRANNY HOOKER FROM A MILE AWAY. 592 00:21:10,620 --> 00:21:11,590 RESPECT. 593 00:21:11,620 --> 00:21:13,620 - MOTHERFUCKING RIGHT, MAN. 594 00:21:13,660 --> 00:21:16,630 SHIT, THIS BITCH KALI GOT MY FUCKING HEART ON FIRE, MAN. 595 00:21:16,660 --> 00:21:18,490 - YEAH, I KNOW HOW THAT FEELS, BROTHER. 596 00:21:18,530 --> 00:21:19,930 BUT YOU KNOW WHAT STING SAYS. 597 00:21:19,960 --> 00:21:21,530 - WHAT DOES STING SAY? 598 00:21:21,560 --> 00:21:23,400 - HE SAYS THAT IF YOU LOVE SOMEBODY, 599 00:21:23,430 --> 00:21:24,770 YOU SET THEM FREE. 600 00:21:24,800 --> 00:21:27,100 - STING SAYS THAT? - YEP, HE SURE DOES. 601 00:21:27,140 --> 00:21:28,600 - YOU'RE FUCKING WITH ME, MAN. 602 00:21:28,640 --> 00:21:30,440 - NO, HE SAYS THAT. HE SINGS ABOUT IT. 603 00:21:30,470 --> 00:21:32,840 - THAT SAYING BEEN AROUND SINCE THE STONE AGES. 604 00:21:32,880 --> 00:21:34,610 - YEAH, WELL, STING'S THE ONE WHO WROTE A SONG ABOUT IT. 605 00:21:34,640 --> 00:21:36,350 - YOU THINK I'M DUMB, DON'T YOU, MOODY? 606 00:21:36,380 --> 00:21:37,910 - NO, I DON'T. 607 00:21:37,950 --> 00:21:39,850 - THEN WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS FUCKING CONDESCENDING TO ME? 608 00:21:39,880 --> 00:21:41,820 - I'M NOT CONDESCENDING TO YOU. I'M RELATING. 609 00:21:41,850 --> 00:21:44,020 - YOU KNOW I GOT A FUCKING BROKEN HEART RIGHT NOW, RIGHT? 610 00:21:44,050 --> 00:21:45,520 - I DO KNOW THAT. YES, I KNOW. 611 00:21:45,550 --> 00:21:46,860 - FUCKING JERSEY SHORE ASS NIGGA, MAN, 612 00:21:46,890 --> 00:21:49,460 STICKING HIS PENCIL DICK IN MY SWEET POUND CAKE. 613 00:21:49,490 --> 00:21:50,830 - YEAH, I RELATE. 614 00:21:50,860 --> 00:21:52,460 YOU KNOW, RIGHT NOW THE LOVE OF MY LIFE 615 00:21:52,500 --> 00:21:54,530 IS GETTING POUNDED BY SOME OMNISEXUAL CHICKEN HAWK. 616 00:21:54,560 --> 00:21:56,030 DOESN'T FEEL GOOD. 617 00:21:56,060 --> 00:21:58,730 - NAH. 618 00:21:58,770 --> 00:22:01,570 - IT COULD BE WORSE. - YEAH, HOW? 619 00:22:01,600 --> 00:22:03,870 - COULDA JUST HAD YOUR DICK DRAINED BY A TRANNY HOOKER. 620 00:22:03,910 --> 00:22:05,070 [both laugh] 621 00:22:05,110 --> 00:22:06,880 - TRUE DAT. 622 00:22:06,910 --> 00:22:10,050 - IT'S NOT FUNNY! WHY ARE YOU LAUGHING? 623 00:22:10,080 --> 00:22:12,750 - OH, MAN. 624 00:22:12,780 --> 00:22:14,650 [laughter] 625 00:22:14,680 --> 00:22:17,150 [cell phone rings] 626 00:22:17,190 --> 00:22:19,020 - OH. 627 00:22:19,050 --> 00:22:20,590 BECCA, HEY, SWEETIE. 628 00:22:20,620 --> 00:22:21,890 I THOUGHT YOU WEREN'T TALKING TO ME. 629 00:22:21,920 --> 00:22:23,760 SHH! 630 00:22:23,790 --> 00:22:25,030 WAIT, HOLD UP. 631 00:22:25,060 --> 00:22:27,000 SLOW DOWN, SLOW DOWN, SLOW DOWN. 632 00:22:27,030 --> 00:22:28,400 IT'S BACK? 633 00:22:28,430 --> 00:22:29,670 OKAY, I GOTTA SEE THIS. 634 00:22:29,700 --> 00:22:32,030 WE'LL BE THERE. - WHAT'S UP? 635 00:22:32,070 --> 00:22:33,770 - WE GOT SOMEWHERE WE GOTTA GO. 636 00:22:33,800 --> 00:22:37,510 [sirens blare] - LET'S GO DEEP. 637 00:22:37,540 --> 00:22:39,940 [laughter] 638 00:22:44,080 --> 00:22:45,950 - YOU OKAY, BABY? WHAT HAPPENED? 639 00:22:45,980 --> 00:22:48,780 - SEE FOR YOURSELF. - IT WAS AMAZING, HANK. 640 00:22:48,820 --> 00:22:51,850 IT'S THE COOLEST THING THAT I'VE EVER SEEN. 641 00:22:53,090 --> 00:22:54,820 WHAT? IT WAS, I'M SORRY. 642 00:22:56,790 --> 00:22:58,030 - RICHARD-- - PEEK-A-BOO, 643 00:22:58,060 --> 00:22:59,530 AND FINE WINE. 644 00:22:59,560 --> 00:23:00,530 COME ON UP, HONEY. 645 00:23:00,560 --> 00:23:02,530 - COME-- GET DOWN NOW. 646 00:23:02,570 --> 00:23:04,430 - I CAN'T REMEMBER THE SONG. - KAREN. 647 00:23:04,470 --> 00:23:05,670 - JESUS. 648 00:23:05,700 --> 00:23:07,000 WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING HERE? 649 00:23:07,040 --> 00:23:08,670 - IT'S A LONG STORY, AND ULTIMATELY 650 00:23:08,700 --> 00:23:09,970 NOT AS INTERESTING AS WHAT'S HAPPENING HERE. 651 00:23:10,010 --> 00:23:13,010 WHAT HAPPENED? - TYLER SWITCHED DRINKS, 652 00:23:13,040 --> 00:23:14,540 THOUGHT IT WOULD BE FUNNY TO WATCH HIM GET DRUNK. 653 00:23:14,580 --> 00:23:16,550 - JESUS, THAT KID REALLY IS A YOUNG ME. 654 00:23:16,580 --> 00:23:18,580 HEY, BATESY! 655 00:23:18,610 --> 00:23:20,120 - HANK, GOD DAMN IT! IT'S GREAT TO SEE YOU! 656 00:23:20,150 --> 00:23:21,750 I'M SO GLAD YOU COULD MAKE IT. 657 00:23:21,780 --> 00:23:22,750 - GOOD TO SEE YOU TOO, MAN. 658 00:23:22,790 --> 00:23:24,220 LOVING THAT MAN-GINA. 659 00:23:24,250 --> 00:23:26,590 - THANK YOU. IT IS FUCKING LIBERATING. 660 00:23:26,620 --> 00:23:28,120 - HEY, YOU WANNA COME DOWN AND PUT SOME CLOTHES ON 661 00:23:28,160 --> 00:23:29,830 BEFORE THE LAW GETS HERE? 662 00:23:29,860 --> 00:23:31,160 - NO, NO, NONSENSE. I'M TUCKED. 663 00:23:31,190 --> 00:23:32,830 YOU KNOW, I WAS JUST TELLING KAREN 664 00:23:32,860 --> 00:23:35,000 I USED TO FUCK GUYS LIKE TYLER BACK IN PRISON. 665 00:23:35,030 --> 00:23:37,070 DID I EVER TELL YOU ABOUT THE YEAR I SPENT BEHIND BARS? 666 00:23:37,100 --> 00:23:38,830 - NO. 667 00:23:38,870 --> 00:23:40,540 - YEAH, I WAS RESEARCHING A NOVEL ABOUT PRISON LIFE, 668 00:23:40,570 --> 00:23:42,740 SO I KNOCKED OVER A LITTLE LIQUOR STORE. 669 00:23:42,770 --> 00:23:44,570 THE RESEARCH WAS GREAT, 670 00:23:44,610 --> 00:23:46,680 BUT THERE WAS AN UNEXPECTED GIFT. 671 00:23:46,710 --> 00:23:48,040 I FELL IN LOVE THERE, HANK. 672 00:23:48,080 --> 00:23:50,550 TWICE. TWO VERY DIFFERENT MEN. 673 00:23:50,580 --> 00:23:51,750 - MM-HMM. 674 00:23:51,780 --> 00:23:53,080 - AND WE STILL KEEP IN TOUCH. 675 00:23:53,120 --> 00:23:54,620 I GOTTA TELL YOU, 676 00:23:54,650 --> 00:23:56,250 MEN IN PRISON MAKE EXCEPTIONAL PEN PALS. 677 00:23:56,280 --> 00:23:58,250 LETTERS LIKE FUCKING SHORT STORIES. 678 00:23:58,290 --> 00:23:59,590 YOU REMEMBER YOUR FIRST SHORT STORY, HANK? 679 00:23:59,620 --> 00:24:00,960 - YEAH. 680 00:24:00,990 --> 00:24:03,260 - FINISHING MINE GAVE ME A THUNDEROUS ERECTION. 681 00:24:03,290 --> 00:24:05,060 YOU REMEMBER YOUR FIRST ERECTION? 682 00:24:05,090 --> 00:24:06,700 - YEAH, I HAD A BIG CRUSH 683 00:24:06,730 --> 00:24:08,260 ON THE BLONDE FROM THE BEVERLY HILLBILLIES. 684 00:24:08,300 --> 00:24:10,000 - ELLY MAY CLAMPETT. 685 00:24:10,030 --> 00:24:13,040 SPILT A LOT OF BOY MILK TO THAT FOXY LITTLE TRAMP. 686 00:24:13,070 --> 00:24:15,000 YEAH. 687 00:24:15,040 --> 00:24:16,570 YOU KNOW, THANKS TO THAT FINE MEMORY, 688 00:24:16,610 --> 00:24:18,570 THE BLOOD IS STARTING TO FLOW DOWN SOUTH. 689 00:24:18,610 --> 00:24:20,940 THIS COULD BE PRETTY HARD TO TUCK IN A MINUTE. 690 00:24:20,980 --> 00:24:22,680 - I HEAR YOU. - I'M GOING FOR A RUN. 691 00:24:22,710 --> 00:24:24,280 GIVE ME A HUG. 692 00:24:24,310 --> 00:24:27,550 - THERE YOU GO. THERE YOU GO. 693 00:24:27,580 --> 00:24:29,020 - I LOVE YOU, BABE. 694 00:24:29,050 --> 00:24:30,690 DON'T WAIT UP. 695 00:24:30,720 --> 00:24:32,890 - HEY, HEY, HEY. 696 00:24:32,920 --> 00:24:34,290 YOU WANT ME TO GO AFTER HIM? 697 00:24:34,320 --> 00:24:36,990 - NO, I DON'T. JUST LET HIM RUN IT OFF. 698 00:24:37,030 --> 00:24:39,530 - HEY, TYLER, NOT COOL. - I'M SPEECHLESS. 699 00:24:39,560 --> 00:24:41,160 - NOT COOL. - I AM SPEECHLESS. 700 00:24:41,200 --> 00:24:42,970 - NOT COOL AT ALL. - I KNOW, I KNOW. 701 00:24:43,000 --> 00:24:44,700 OKAY, I'M SORRY, ALL RIGHT? I FEEL BAD. 702 00:24:44,730 --> 00:24:46,100 - YEAH. 703 00:24:46,130 --> 00:24:47,640 - BUT, LOOK, BECCA TOLD ME ALL THESE STORIES 704 00:24:47,670 --> 00:24:50,040 ABOUT HOW CRAZY HE GETS WHEN HE DRINKS. 705 00:24:50,070 --> 00:24:51,770 AND, LOOK, IT WAS JUST-- IT WAS TOO TEMPTING. 706 00:24:51,810 --> 00:24:52,980 - ALL RIGHT, MUCH AS I HATE TO SAY IT, 707 00:24:53,010 --> 00:24:54,540 I UNDERSTAND, BUT-- 708 00:24:54,580 --> 00:24:55,980 - BESIDES, HE WAS BEING A TOTAL DICK. 709 00:24:56,010 --> 00:24:57,210 IT'S LIKE HE WAS STANDING IN FOR YOU TONIGHT. 710 00:24:57,250 --> 00:24:59,010 LITERALLY GIVING ME A HARD TIME 711 00:24:59,050 --> 00:25:01,050 ABOUT EVERY SINGLE WORD THAT WAS COMING OUT OF MY MOUTH. 712 00:25:01,080 --> 00:25:02,920 SHIT JUST GETS TIRING, YOU KNOW, 713 00:25:02,950 --> 00:25:04,750 AND I JUST HIT MY LIMIT. 714 00:25:04,790 --> 00:25:06,590 - YO, AN ORDER OF ANKIO, MAN. 715 00:25:06,620 --> 00:25:07,790 - IS HE WITH YOU BY ANY CHANCE? 716 00:25:07,820 --> 00:25:09,560 - WHO, THAT-- - YEAH. 717 00:25:09,590 --> 00:25:10,890 - THAT WOMAN? - NO, HIM. 718 00:25:10,930 --> 00:25:12,960 - OH, HIM? OFFICER DOLEMITE OVER THERE? 719 00:25:13,000 --> 00:25:14,760 NO, I'VE NEVER SEEN HIM BEFORE IN MY LIFE. 720 00:25:14,800 --> 00:25:16,330 - YEAH? 'CAUSE I'M PRETTY SURE HE WAS THERE 721 00:25:16,360 --> 00:25:17,900 THE NIGHT I GOT MY ASS KICKED. 722 00:25:17,930 --> 00:25:19,330 - REALLY? THAT WOULD BE QUITE A COINKYDINK. 723 00:25:19,370 --> 00:25:20,570 YOU SURE YOU'RE NOT JUST BEING RACIST? 724 00:25:20,600 --> 00:25:21,840 YOU GOTTA CHECK THAT-- 725 00:25:21,870 --> 00:25:23,170 - YO, MOODY, YOU SEEN THAT FUCKING 726 00:25:23,210 --> 00:25:24,310 NAKED GUY RUN OUTTA HERE? 727 00:25:24,340 --> 00:25:25,770 FUCKING DICK SWINGING 728 00:25:25,810 --> 00:25:26,940 IN SOME REAL WHITE BOY SHIT, YO. 729 00:25:26,980 --> 00:25:29,780 CRAZY. HEY, YO. 730 00:25:29,810 --> 00:25:31,210 YO, AIN'T THIS THE LITTLE ROMEO 731 00:25:31,250 --> 00:25:32,580 WE HAD TO SMACK DOWN AT THE CLUB THE OTHER NIGHT? 732 00:25:32,620 --> 00:25:34,920 - YES, YES, IT IS. GOOD TO SEE YOU. 733 00:25:34,950 --> 00:25:36,820 - GOOD TO SEE YOU TOO. YOU'RE HEALING REAL GOOD, SON. 734 00:25:36,850 --> 00:25:39,120 - THANKS. 735 00:25:39,150 --> 00:25:40,690 - DAD, WHAT DID YOU DO? 736 00:25:40,720 --> 00:25:43,090 - NOTHING. I DID--I DID NOTHING. 737 00:25:43,130 --> 00:25:44,790 WILL YOU TELL THEM? - WILL YOU ANSWER HER? 738 00:25:44,830 --> 00:25:46,230 - TELL 'EM. - TELL 'EM WHAT? 739 00:25:46,260 --> 00:25:49,100 - THAT I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING OF THAT NATURE. 740 00:25:49,130 --> 00:25:50,370 - NO, HE AIN'T DO ANYTHING THOUGH, 741 00:25:50,400 --> 00:25:51,700 BUT I KNEW IT WAS IMPORTANT TO HIM, 742 00:25:51,730 --> 00:25:52,970 SO I TOOK CARE OF IT. 743 00:25:53,000 --> 00:25:54,600 THAT'S WHAT WE DO FOR EACH OTHER. 744 00:25:54,640 --> 00:25:56,300 I'D BE HAPPY TO DO IT AGAIN IF NECESSARY. 745 00:25:56,340 --> 00:25:57,770 - IT'S NOT NECESSARY. 746 00:25:57,810 --> 00:26:00,110 - LET'S GO. 747 00:26:01,640 --> 00:26:03,280 - THEY MAKE A CUTE COUPLE, MAN. 748 00:26:03,310 --> 00:26:04,950 I DON'T SEE WHY YOU GETTING SO FUCKING BENT UP ABOUT IT. 749 00:26:04,980 --> 00:26:06,920 - THANKS. THAT WAS VERY HELPFUL. 750 00:26:06,950 --> 00:26:08,650 - COOL, LET'S GET SOME SAKE. 751 00:26:08,680 --> 00:26:11,220 UNFILTERED SAKE, NIGORI. 752 00:26:15,690 --> 00:26:17,130 I WANNA SEE SOME NEW PAGES TOMORROW, MOODY. 753 00:26:17,160 --> 00:26:20,160 - WHAT EXACTLY HAVE WE LEARNED TONIGHT? 754 00:26:20,200 --> 00:26:21,860 - OUR BOY RUNKLE LEARNED WHAT IT'S LIKE 755 00:26:21,900 --> 00:26:23,400 TO COME IN A TRANNY HOOKER'S MOUTH. 756 00:26:23,430 --> 00:26:27,000 - THANK YOU, SAM. THANK YOU SO MUCH. 757 00:26:27,040 --> 00:26:29,000 I'D ALMOST MANAGED TO STOP THINKING ABOUT IT 758 00:26:29,040 --> 00:26:31,270 FOR FIVE WHOLE SECONDS THERE. 759 00:26:31,310 --> 00:26:32,740 - GARGLE, GARGLE, YO. 760 00:26:32,780 --> 00:26:34,740 [laughs] 761 00:26:34,780 --> 00:26:36,780 HOLY SHIT, YO. CHECK THAT OUT. 762 00:26:36,810 --> 00:26:39,680 WHAT THE FUCK? 763 00:26:40,850 --> 00:26:42,920 - [laughing] 764 00:26:46,450 --> 00:26:47,920 - BATESY! 765 00:26:47,960 --> 00:26:49,960 - HEY! - HEY, WANT A RIDE? 766 00:26:49,990 --> 00:26:51,330 - OH, I DON'T MIND IF I DO. 767 00:26:51,360 --> 00:26:55,060 - WELL, GET ON IN. 768 00:26:55,100 --> 00:26:56,430 - THANKS, BOYS. 769 00:26:56,460 --> 00:26:58,830 WHO'S UP FOR A COCKTAIL? 770 00:27:01,270 --> 00:27:03,740 [siren blaring] 771 00:27:03,770 --> 00:27:07,040 - OH, FUCK. 772 00:27:07,080 --> 00:27:10,010 [rock music] 54718

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