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1
00:00:01,871 --> 00:00:06,571
[ lisping]:
...four, five, six, seven,
2
00:00:06,658 --> 00:00:09,226
eight, nine...
3
00:00:09,313 --> 00:00:13,491
Yes, I still have
the record, sucker!
4
00:00:13,578 --> 00:00:17,626
♪ Yes, no, maybe ♪
5
00:00:17,713 --> 00:00:18,975
♪ I don't know ♪
6
00:00:19,062 --> 00:00:22,326
♪ Can you repeat the question? ♪
7
00:00:22,413 --> 00:00:24,502
♪ You're not the boss
of me now ♪
8
00:00:24,589 --> 00:00:26,983
♪ You're not
the boss of me now ♪
9
00:00:27,070 --> 00:00:28,376
♪ You're not the boss
of me now ♪
10
00:00:28,463 --> 00:00:31,466
♪ And you're not so big ♪
11
00:00:31,553 --> 00:00:33,598
♪ You're not the boss
of me now ♪
12
00:00:33,685 --> 00:00:35,992
♪ You're not
the boss of me now ♪
13
00:00:36,079 --> 00:00:37,863
♪ You're not the boss
of me now ♪
14
00:00:37,950 --> 00:00:41,302
♪ And you're not so big ♪
15
00:00:41,389 --> 00:00:45,915
♪ Life is unfair ♪
16
00:00:51,399 --> 00:00:54,967
I swear this mall gets more
beautiful every time we come.
17
00:00:55,055 --> 00:00:57,187
They have really made
some changes.
18
00:00:57,274 --> 00:00:59,015
There used to be
a Banana Republic over there.
19
00:00:59,102 --> 00:01:00,799
Now it's over there.
20
00:01:00,886 --> 00:01:02,584
Can we please just get my
underwear and get out of here?
21
00:01:02,671 --> 00:01:03,759
Malcolm, you know
22
00:01:03,846 --> 00:01:05,194
it's hard
to buy underwear for you.
23
00:01:05,282 --> 00:01:07,067
You have your
father's irregular crotch.
24
00:01:07,154 --> 00:01:08,416
Nothing to be ashamed of, son.
25
00:01:08,503 --> 00:01:10,026
If a woman really
loves you,
26
00:01:10,113 --> 00:01:11,549
it won't bother
her a bit.
27
00:01:13,812 --> 00:01:15,379
Oh, oh, oh, oh!
28
00:01:15,466 --> 00:01:16,946
Will you look at that?
29
00:01:17,033 --> 00:01:20,602
They turned a Soap Town
into a Soap And Such.
30
00:01:24,388 --> 00:01:26,521
Hi. Are you here
to take class?
31
00:01:26,608 --> 00:01:27,696
Yes,
32
00:01:27,783 --> 00:01:28,958
that's why
I came in here,
33
00:01:29,045 --> 00:01:30,002
to take class.
34
00:01:30,090 --> 00:01:32,222
It's dancing, right?
35
00:01:32,309 --> 00:01:34,572
Yes. Just sign up
at the counter.
36
00:01:38,489 --> 00:01:39,621
So, you're the new guy.
37
00:01:39,708 --> 00:01:41,449
What? Oh, yeah, hi.
38
00:01:41,536 --> 00:01:43,451
Zzzt! It's all right.
39
00:01:43,538 --> 00:01:45,148
I don't mind
a little competition,
40
00:01:45,235 --> 00:01:48,282
but just so you know
what you're up against.
41
00:01:59,989 --> 00:02:02,992
So the person who keeps
his or her hand
42
00:02:03,079 --> 00:02:04,733
on the vehicle the longest
43
00:02:04,820 --> 00:02:08,824
is going to drive out of here
in this brand-new truck!
44
00:02:08,911 --> 00:02:10,955
Oh, Hal,
look at that truck.
45
00:02:11,043 --> 00:02:13,307
Can you imagine if we could
finally get rid of the van?
46
00:02:13,394 --> 00:02:15,526
That piece of junk's costing us
a hundred bucks a month
47
00:02:15,613 --> 00:02:17,311
in duct tape alone.
48
00:02:17,398 --> 00:02:19,182
All right, the contest is going
to begin in ten seconds.
49
00:02:19,269 --> 00:02:21,793
If all the contestants
are ready, here we go.
50
00:02:21,880 --> 00:02:25,232
In seven, six, five,
51
00:02:25,319 --> 00:02:29,627
four, three, two, one.
And we're off!
52
00:02:29,714 --> 00:02:32,456
I can't believe we never entered
one of these contests before.
53
00:02:32,543 --> 00:02:34,110
It's going to be
a long ride, honey.
54
00:02:34,197 --> 00:02:35,242
[ cell phone ringing]
Hello?
55
00:02:35,329 --> 00:02:36,460
We got our first loser.
56
00:02:36,547 --> 00:02:38,245
-Ha! Idiot!
-Number two.
57
00:02:38,332 --> 00:02:39,985
[ shrieks]
Damn it all to hell!
58
00:02:45,513 --> 00:02:47,645
Come on, pal, here we go,
here we go.
59
00:02:47,732 --> 00:02:48,646
There we go.
60
00:02:49,604 --> 00:02:51,127
Oh!
61
00:02:51,214 --> 00:02:53,173
Oh, geez.
62
00:02:53,260 --> 00:02:54,217
[ grunts]
63
00:02:55,740 --> 00:02:57,568
No, no, no, Jamie!
64
00:02:57,655 --> 00:02:59,918
You have to stay in your chair
until breakfast is ready, okay?
65
00:03:00,005 --> 00:03:02,007
Listen, your mommy's going
to be home in a couple days,
66
00:03:02,094 --> 00:03:03,574
just as soon as she wins
that truck.
67
00:03:03,661 --> 00:03:05,620
And then everything
will be back to normal.
68
00:03:05,707 --> 00:03:08,188
Oh, eggs.
69
00:03:13,149 --> 00:03:14,890
Ow, ow, ow!
70
00:03:14,977 --> 00:03:16,544
Ooh!
71
00:03:16,631 --> 00:03:19,068
Oh, oh, oh, God.
72
00:03:19,155 --> 00:03:20,635
Oh, dear.
73
00:03:20,722 --> 00:03:23,812
[ phone rings]
74
00:03:23,899 --> 00:03:24,900
Hello!
75
00:03:24,987 --> 00:03:26,554
Oh, hi, Hal, how's it going?
76
00:03:26,641 --> 00:03:29,209
Oh, uh, everything is...
everything's great, honey.
77
00:03:29,296 --> 00:03:30,601
Oh, good. Listen,
78
00:03:30,688 --> 00:03:32,124
I was thinking this might
be the perfect time
79
00:03:32,212 --> 00:03:33,778
for you to get to your
"To Do" board.
80
00:03:37,347 --> 00:03:39,480
Well, um, you know,
I am not sure
81
00:03:39,567 --> 00:03:41,917
that I'm going to be able to...
82
00:03:42,004 --> 00:03:44,311
Hal, I'm making this sacrifice
for the whole family.
83
00:03:44,398 --> 00:03:45,486
I think the least you can do
84
00:03:45,573 --> 00:03:46,878
is catch up on some housework.
85
00:03:46,965 --> 00:03:49,229
Okay, okay,
I'll talk to you later.
86
00:03:49,316 --> 00:03:52,536
Oh, geez.
87
00:03:56,061 --> 00:03:56,975
[ loud crash]
88
00:03:57,062 --> 00:03:58,281
What was that?
89
00:03:58,368 --> 00:04:00,065
REESE AND DEWEY:
Nothing!
90
00:04:00,152 --> 00:04:04,635
Oh, my God, Dad's middle
management trophy-- The Middie.
91
00:04:04,722 --> 00:04:07,508
We have no choice but to confess
and take the punishment.
92
00:04:10,772 --> 00:04:11,642
You're a good brother.
93
00:04:11,729 --> 00:04:13,296
Hey!
94
00:04:21,086 --> 00:04:23,001
Are you sure you've
never danced before?
95
00:04:23,088 --> 00:04:24,568
No, never.
96
00:04:24,655 --> 00:04:28,398
♪ Dance with me,
make me sway ♪
97
00:04:28,485 --> 00:04:32,576
♪ Like a lazy ocean
hugs the shore ♪
98
00:04:32,663 --> 00:04:33,621
♪ Hold me close ♪
99
00:04:33,708 --> 00:04:35,492
♪ Sway me more ♪
100
00:04:35,579 --> 00:04:37,538
You really have a gift.
101
00:04:37,625 --> 00:04:38,756
♪ Like a flower bending
in the breeze ♪
102
00:04:38,843 --> 00:04:40,976
She's right.
103
00:04:41,063 --> 00:04:42,717
Turns out,
I'm naturally talented
104
00:04:42,804 --> 00:04:44,849
at science and dancing...
105
00:04:44,936 --> 00:04:47,025
two things that are guaranteed
to get you beat up.
106
00:04:47,112 --> 00:04:49,637
♪ Stay with me ♪
107
00:04:49,724 --> 00:04:51,943
♪ Sway with me ♪
108
00:04:57,253 --> 00:04:58,776
All right, partner up.
109
00:04:58,863 --> 00:05:00,648
You know,
our dance competition's
110
00:05:00,735 --> 00:05:01,997
coming up next week.
111
00:05:02,084 --> 00:05:03,433
You can choose
any girl in the class
112
00:05:03,520 --> 00:05:04,739
to be your partner.
113
00:05:04,826 --> 00:05:06,436
Really? Any girl?
114
00:05:06,523 --> 00:05:08,830
♪ Other dancers may be
on the floor ♪
115
00:05:08,917 --> 00:05:12,224
You and Danielle
would be a dream together.
116
00:05:12,312 --> 00:05:13,791
Who?
117
00:05:13,878 --> 00:05:15,489
♪ But my eyes
will see only you ♪
118
00:05:15,576 --> 00:05:18,230
♪ Only you have
that magic technique ♪
119
00:05:18,318 --> 00:05:21,495
I think I need a little
time to think about it.
120
00:05:21,582 --> 00:05:24,933
♪ I can hear the sound
of violin... ♪
121
00:05:28,893 --> 00:05:30,852
Say hi to Angela
for me.
122
00:05:33,942 --> 00:05:36,074
So who's Angela?
123
00:05:36,161 --> 00:05:37,424
She's my best friend.
124
00:05:37,511 --> 00:05:38,425
He's helping her move.
125
00:05:38,512 --> 00:05:40,644
-Huh.
-What?
126
00:05:42,167 --> 00:05:44,735
No, I am not worried
about him and Angela.
127
00:05:44,822 --> 00:05:46,215
Good for you.
128
00:05:46,302 --> 00:05:48,304
I actually met my husband
when he helped me move.
129
00:05:48,391 --> 00:05:49,653
Boy, there's nothing sexier
130
00:05:49,740 --> 00:05:51,438
than a man
coming to the rescue.
131
00:05:52,308 --> 00:05:54,266
The two of you lug
that mattress up the stairs,
132
00:05:54,354 --> 00:05:56,443
you get it laid down
on the floor in the bedroom.
133
00:05:56,530 --> 00:05:58,836
You're both
already sweaty.
134
00:05:58,923 --> 00:06:01,970
Anyway, I think
you're making the right choice.
135
00:06:02,057 --> 00:06:03,406
A truck will never
let you down.
136
00:06:03,493 --> 00:06:06,104
I've got to go.
137
00:06:08,933 --> 00:06:11,371
Can't we just throw
the thing in the trash?
138
00:06:11,458 --> 00:06:13,111
That is the worst
possible place.
139
00:06:13,198 --> 00:06:14,461
Dad accidentally throws
140
00:06:14,548 --> 00:06:16,027
his car keys out
three times a week,
141
00:06:16,114 --> 00:06:18,160
and he always ends up
going through the barrels.
142
00:06:18,247 --> 00:06:19,770
[ loud clunk]
143
00:06:19,857 --> 00:06:21,206
What was that?
144
00:06:25,646 --> 00:06:26,864
There's a handle here.
145
00:06:33,001 --> 00:06:34,524
Oh, my God, do you
know what this means?
146
00:06:34,611 --> 00:06:36,004
Yes!
147
00:06:36,091 --> 00:06:37,614
Rabbits have been
using our technology!
148
00:06:37,701 --> 00:06:39,007
No, it's a bomb shelter.
149
00:06:39,094 --> 00:06:40,356
People built these
in the '50s and '60s
150
00:06:40,443 --> 00:06:41,531
in case of a nuclear war.
151
00:06:47,624 --> 00:06:48,843
This is incredible.
152
00:06:50,888 --> 00:06:51,759
HAL:
What the hell...?
153
00:06:51,846 --> 00:06:54,022
Dad?
154
00:06:54,109 --> 00:06:56,285
HAL:
Boys, are you down there?
155
00:06:56,372 --> 00:06:59,810
Dad, look, we have
a bomb shelter.
156
00:06:59,897 --> 00:07:02,030
Oh, good God.
157
00:07:02,117 --> 00:07:04,902
I never knew this was here.
158
00:07:04,989 --> 00:07:06,121
-Isn't it amazing?
-All right,
159
00:07:06,208 --> 00:07:07,383
let's get out of here.
160
00:07:07,470 --> 00:07:08,993
We don't know
how stable this place is.
161
00:07:09,080 --> 00:07:11,300
There could be snakes
and rats and...
162
00:07:11,387 --> 00:07:12,606
Is that my trophy?
163
00:07:12,693 --> 00:07:14,564
Yeah.
164
00:07:14,651 --> 00:07:15,565
Here!
165
00:07:15,652 --> 00:07:16,653
What...?
166
00:07:18,742 --> 00:07:20,527
You broke the Middie!
167
00:07:20,614 --> 00:07:21,658
They only give out
168
00:07:21,745 --> 00:07:24,835
200 of these a year!
169
00:07:27,969 --> 00:07:30,145
Hurry, get the trash cans!
170
00:07:30,232 --> 00:07:32,843
HAL:
You boys let me out of here!
171
00:07:41,896 --> 00:07:45,552
HAL [ yelling]:
Are you trying to bury me here
like a rat?!
172
00:07:45,639 --> 00:07:47,641
-You want to see what's on TV?
-Okay.
173
00:07:47,728 --> 00:07:49,338
HAL:
Get me out of here!
174
00:07:49,425 --> 00:07:52,080
They let me pick Hanna
as my partner.
175
00:07:52,167 --> 00:07:54,343
We really got a shot
at winning this competition.
176
00:07:54,430 --> 00:07:56,606
Plus, I get to touch her body,
like, a lot.
177
00:07:59,870 --> 00:08:00,871
-Ow!
-Sorry.
178
00:08:01,785 --> 00:08:02,743
[ groans]
179
00:08:04,222 --> 00:08:05,789
[ groans]
180
00:08:05,876 --> 00:08:06,790
[ groans]
181
00:08:10,185 --> 00:08:14,232
Dad, if you can hear me,
knock once on the hatch.
182
00:08:14,319 --> 00:08:16,321
[ single knock]
183
00:08:16,408 --> 00:08:18,585
Okay, it's pretty obvious
184
00:08:18,672 --> 00:08:19,977
we've all made
some mistakes here.
185
00:08:20,064 --> 00:08:21,588
There's no point
in trying to figure out
186
00:08:21,675 --> 00:08:22,676
who's right and who's wrong.
187
00:08:22,763 --> 00:08:24,068
The important thing is
188
00:08:24,155 --> 00:08:26,984
you forgive us
so we can forgive you
189
00:08:27,071 --> 00:08:28,420
so we can let you out.
190
00:08:28,508 --> 00:08:30,074
Now if we're all
on the same page,
191
00:08:30,161 --> 00:08:32,729
knock once
on the lid.
192
00:08:32,816 --> 00:08:33,991
[ single knock]
193
00:08:34,078 --> 00:08:35,515
He agreed.
We're both witnesses.
194
00:08:44,698 --> 00:08:46,003
Dad, I really think...
195
00:08:46,090 --> 00:08:47,222
[ screaming]
196
00:08:48,789 --> 00:08:49,659
It's a trick!
197
00:08:49,746 --> 00:08:51,095
I will...!
198
00:08:51,182 --> 00:08:53,358
[ growling]
199
00:08:53,445 --> 00:08:54,621
I just...!
200
00:08:54,708 --> 00:08:56,448
Vengeance!
201
00:08:59,669 --> 00:09:00,931
Back, Dad!
Back, Dad!
202
00:09:01,018 --> 00:09:02,324
Back!
[ screaming]
203
00:09:04,456 --> 00:09:06,981
[ Hal screaming]
204
00:09:07,068 --> 00:09:09,853
I don't know if I can
trust Dad after this.
205
00:09:18,383 --> 00:09:19,167
You're insane.
206
00:09:19,254 --> 00:09:20,647
I'm just saying,
207
00:09:20,734 --> 00:09:22,083
how much food could
there be down there?
208
00:09:22,170 --> 00:09:23,345
Eventually, this will
take care of itself.
209
00:09:23,432 --> 00:09:24,912
-Reese!
-He's had a long life.
210
00:09:24,999 --> 00:09:26,043
What is he, like, 70?
211
00:09:26,130 --> 00:09:27,262
/Forget it.
212
00:09:27,349 --> 00:09:28,742
Ah, you're right.
213
00:09:28,829 --> 00:09:30,004
I forgot about Mom.
214
00:09:30,091 --> 00:09:31,179
She's bound to
notice eventually,
215
00:09:31,266 --> 00:09:32,528
no matter how
busy she is.
216
00:09:32,615 --> 00:09:34,182
And once she latches
on to something,
217
00:09:34,269 --> 00:09:36,097
you know how she
never lets it go.
218
00:09:40,536 --> 00:09:42,103
[ frustrated grunt]
219
00:09:42,190 --> 00:09:43,931
[ sighs]
220
00:09:44,018 --> 00:09:45,323
Ow!
221
00:09:45,410 --> 00:09:46,411
[ grunts]
222
00:09:51,199 --> 00:09:52,200
Whoa!
223
00:09:58,249 --> 00:10:01,296
Well, hello.
224
00:10:01,383 --> 00:10:02,645
Oh!
225
00:10:08,477 --> 00:10:11,611
Mr. President.
226
00:10:11,698 --> 00:10:15,310
Well, looks like we're
in this Cold War together.
227
00:10:15,397 --> 00:10:18,443
So, Jack...
228
00:10:18,530 --> 00:10:20,228
what are you drinking?
229
00:10:22,796 --> 00:10:23,927
So what if she's a klutz?
230
00:10:24,014 --> 00:10:24,972
She's still beautiful, right?
231
00:10:26,669 --> 00:10:28,192
I can't wait
for the competition.
232
00:10:28,279 --> 00:10:29,498
You and me
233
00:10:29,585 --> 00:10:30,760
out there
in front of everyone?
234
00:10:31,631 --> 00:10:32,632
[ groans]
235
00:10:35,765 --> 00:10:37,462
All right,
she's totally hot,
236
00:10:37,549 --> 00:10:38,725
but she's got no presence.
237
00:10:38,812 --> 00:10:40,204
Her footwork's sloppy
238
00:10:40,291 --> 00:10:42,424
and her jazz square's
all over the place.
239
00:10:43,512 --> 00:10:44,948
[ chuckles]
240
00:10:48,430 --> 00:10:51,041
I'm just going to have
to make my peace with this.
241
00:10:51,128 --> 00:10:52,521
I chose Hanna for the contest
242
00:10:52,608 --> 00:10:54,218
and now there's nothing
I can do about it.
243
00:10:54,305 --> 00:10:55,480
♪ I like to sneak a drink ♪
244
00:10:55,567 --> 00:10:56,699
♪ Roll my smoke ♪
245
00:10:56,786 --> 00:10:57,787
♪ You see, I like my... ♪
246
00:10:57,874 --> 00:10:59,571
Oh, my ankle!
247
00:10:59,659 --> 00:11:00,747
I'm so sorry.
Are you all right?
248
00:11:00,834 --> 00:11:02,792
It hurts.
249
00:11:02,879 --> 00:11:04,098
[ song stops abruptly]
250
00:11:04,185 --> 00:11:05,839
I can't stand on it.
251
00:11:05,926 --> 00:11:07,971
Oh, my God, what
a terrible accident.
252
00:11:08,058 --> 00:11:09,756
It was an accident.
253
00:11:09,843 --> 00:11:10,887
I'm so sorry.
254
00:11:10,974 --> 00:11:13,324
It was.
255
00:11:14,674 --> 00:11:17,720
♪ I got the Jack, the Ace,
the King and Queen ♪
256
00:11:17,807 --> 00:11:20,505
♪ You know, I like
my women mean ♪
257
00:11:20,592 --> 00:11:22,638
♪ 'Cause I'm
a big time operatin' ♪
258
00:11:22,725 --> 00:11:26,294
♪ Never ever hesitatin'
sinner VIP ♪
259
00:11:26,381 --> 00:11:28,383
♪ 'Cause I'm
a big time operatin' ♪
260
00:11:28,470 --> 00:11:31,734
♪ Never ever hesitatin'
sinner VIP. ♪
261
00:11:31,821 --> 00:11:33,344
Good.
262
00:11:33,431 --> 00:11:35,085
Perfect.
263
00:11:35,172 --> 00:11:37,435
All right, just turn
and be stronger with your arms.
264
00:11:37,522 --> 00:11:39,263
[ sighs]
265
00:11:39,350 --> 00:11:41,744
I'm so glad you were still
available for the competition.
266
00:11:41,831 --> 00:11:44,225
I was really upset
by Hanna's, um...
267
00:11:44,312 --> 00:11:47,532
accidental injury, but I think
you and I might win this thing.
268
00:11:47,619 --> 00:11:50,318
Well, if we can do it
with our dancing,
269
00:11:50,405 --> 00:11:52,755
maybe you could stop
sleeping with the judges.
270
00:11:52,842 --> 00:11:53,843
That'll free up my evenings.
271
00:11:55,192 --> 00:11:57,368
Who knew she banters, too.
272
00:12:00,720 --> 00:12:02,983
[ lilting music playing]
273
00:12:10,468 --> 00:12:11,818
[ oven bell rings]
274
00:12:11,905 --> 00:12:13,036
Ooh.
275
00:12:13,123 --> 00:12:14,821
[ chuckles]
276
00:12:21,175 --> 00:12:22,350
Ah.
277
00:12:22,437 --> 00:12:25,614
Salisbury steak--
my old friend.
278
00:12:29,661 --> 00:12:32,621
Oh.
279
00:12:32,708 --> 00:12:34,275
Ha-cha.
280
00:12:37,800 --> 00:12:39,671
Hello, ladies.
281
00:12:39,759 --> 00:12:41,369
DEWEY:
Dad?
282
00:12:43,937 --> 00:12:46,026
Dad, you alive?
283
00:12:46,113 --> 00:12:48,115
[ pounding]
The minute
I get out of here,
284
00:12:48,202 --> 00:12:51,118
you boys are in
so much...
285
00:12:53,903 --> 00:12:55,818
...trouble!
286
00:12:55,905 --> 00:12:57,254
Hey, if he's not willing
to negotiate,
287
00:12:57,341 --> 00:12:58,516
we've got no choice.
288
00:12:58,603 --> 00:13:00,040
We're going to have
to split up.
289
00:13:00,127 --> 00:13:02,129
Okay, I'll meet you in Mexico
in five years.
290
00:13:02,216 --> 00:13:03,478
Wait a minute.
291
00:13:03,565 --> 00:13:05,610
What if we do everything
on his "To Do" board
292
00:13:05,697 --> 00:13:06,698
and then let him out?
293
00:13:06,786 --> 00:13:08,396
That's brilliant.
294
00:13:08,483 --> 00:13:10,790
He couldn't be mad at us
if we did all this for him.
295
00:13:10,877 --> 00:13:12,182
He's got stuff on here
296
00:13:12,269 --> 00:13:13,357
that he's been meaning
to do for years.
297
00:13:13,444 --> 00:13:16,186
"Change Dewey's diaper."
298
00:13:17,709 --> 00:13:20,625
So, for the contest, what do
you think we should wear?
299
00:13:20,712 --> 00:13:22,149
I was thinking about
a really hot
300
00:13:22,236 --> 00:13:24,455
sequined backless number.
301
00:13:24,542 --> 00:13:26,588
And for me, something classy.
302
00:13:27,415 --> 00:13:28,416
Just so you know,
303
00:13:28,503 --> 00:13:29,765
I was holding back in there.
304
00:13:29,852 --> 00:13:31,332
You two have no idea
305
00:13:31,419 --> 00:13:33,769
what I'm going to unleash
tomorrow at the contest.
306
00:13:33,856 --> 00:13:35,510
Well, if it's anything like
what you unleashed
307
00:13:35,597 --> 00:13:37,991
during stretching, we're
pulling out of the competition.
308
00:13:38,078 --> 00:13:41,081
Insults are for those
who can't express themselves
309
00:13:41,168 --> 00:13:43,518
in motion.
310
00:13:43,605 --> 00:13:46,826
Hmm, I think I'm falling
in love with him.
311
00:13:46,913 --> 00:13:48,610
You, too?
312
00:13:50,307 --> 00:13:51,395
So, I'll see
you tomorrow?
313
00:13:51,482 --> 00:13:52,657
Right.
314
00:13:52,744 --> 00:13:54,442
Oh, there was
one more thing.
315
00:13:57,662 --> 00:13:59,403
Nope, that wasn't it.
316
00:13:59,490 --> 00:14:00,796
See ya.
317
00:14:05,757 --> 00:14:07,281
I'm sure it's
nothing, Cheryl,
318
00:14:07,368 --> 00:14:08,935
but you'll probably
feel better
319
00:14:09,022 --> 00:14:10,545
after a doctor's
taken a look at it.
320
00:14:10,632 --> 00:14:11,894
[ sobbing]
321
00:14:14,854 --> 00:14:16,899
Wow, Mom, just four left.
That's great.
322
00:14:16,986 --> 00:14:20,990
Yeah, and it'll be three
before you know it.
323
00:14:21,077 --> 00:14:22,426
Mom, I need some advice
on something.
324
00:14:22,513 --> 00:14:24,341
I started taking
this dance class, and...
325
00:14:24,428 --> 00:14:26,430
-Good for you.
-I just signed up
to meet a girl.
326
00:14:26,517 --> 00:14:27,867
Of course.
327
00:14:27,954 --> 00:14:29,651
I got to dance with
the girl I wanted,
328
00:14:29,738 --> 00:14:31,131
but she had
an accident
329
00:14:31,218 --> 00:14:33,350
and I started dancing
with this other girl
330
00:14:33,437 --> 00:14:35,309
and I didn't think there'd
be anything other than
dancing there, and...
331
00:14:35,396 --> 00:14:36,919
And now she likes you
and you're going to
break her heart?
332
00:14:37,006 --> 00:14:38,138
No, that's not it.
333
00:14:38,225 --> 00:14:39,400
I like her, too.
334
00:14:39,487 --> 00:14:41,184
-You both like each other?
-Yeah.
335
00:14:41,271 --> 00:14:43,795
So why are you bothering me?
I'm working here.
336
00:14:43,883 --> 00:14:46,755
The point is I like her,
but she's not exactly
337
00:14:46,842 --> 00:14:48,104
what I consider to be...
338
00:14:48,191 --> 00:14:50,324
a cute girl.
339
00:14:50,411 --> 00:14:52,195
Oh.
340
00:14:52,282 --> 00:14:54,937
Oh, this is going
to be a tricky one.
341
00:14:55,024 --> 00:14:58,375
-Hmm, here, hold this.
-Ow.
342
00:14:58,462 --> 00:14:59,811
What is wrong with you?
343
00:14:59,899 --> 00:15:01,248
You're attracted to her,
she's attracted to you.
344
00:15:01,335 --> 00:15:02,771
The only problem
is in your head.
345
00:15:02,858 --> 00:15:04,207
Listen, if you try
to build relationships
346
00:15:04,294 --> 00:15:07,689
on looks, you are in
for a world of hurt.
347
00:15:07,776 --> 00:15:08,951
I mean, take Janet here.
348
00:15:09,038 --> 00:15:11,127
20 years ago she marries
her husband
349
00:15:11,214 --> 00:15:12,824
because she thinks he
looks like Lee Majors.
350
00:15:12,912 --> 00:15:14,478
And today he's lost
all his hair,
351
00:15:14,565 --> 00:15:16,350
he's gained 200 pounds
and she is stuck with a blimp
352
00:15:16,437 --> 00:15:18,439
who won't even put on his shirt
to come to the dinner table.
353
00:15:18,526 --> 00:15:21,529
She is reduced to trying
to win his attention
354
00:15:21,616 --> 00:15:22,660
by bringing home a truck.
355
00:15:22,747 --> 00:15:24,619
I mean, how sad is that?
356
00:15:24,706 --> 00:15:29,493
[ sobbing]:
That is what I'm doing,
isn't it?
357
00:15:33,628 --> 00:15:35,195
You see that?
358
00:15:35,282 --> 00:15:37,545
That took courage.
359
00:15:38,459 --> 00:15:40,287
I'll tell you, Jack,
360
00:15:40,374 --> 00:15:42,245
they made women
in those days.
361
00:15:42,332 --> 00:15:45,683
There's nothing wrong with
a little meat on the bones.
362
00:15:45,770 --> 00:15:49,600
Now, that is a fanny.
363
00:15:49,687 --> 00:15:52,864
Ah, Jack, you died too young.
364
00:15:52,952 --> 00:15:55,041
We beat 'em.
365
00:15:55,128 --> 00:15:56,651
Now they're wearing blue jeans
366
00:15:56,738 --> 00:15:58,435
and eating cheeseburgers
in Red Square.
367
00:15:58,522 --> 00:16:01,395
Oh, and we made it to the moon.
368
00:16:01,482 --> 00:16:05,355
Big waste of money.
369
00:16:05,442 --> 00:16:08,968
I'll tell you what
I miss the most, Jack.
370
00:16:09,055 --> 00:16:13,363
All these years, we have never
had a president as cool as you.
371
00:16:13,450 --> 00:16:15,539
Here's to you, buddy.
372
00:16:19,804 --> 00:16:22,242
You're right to look
at me like that.
373
00:16:22,329 --> 00:16:25,854
You just can't drink
a martini without an olive.
374
00:16:40,477 --> 00:16:42,436
Well, would you
look at that.
375
00:16:42,523 --> 00:16:43,567
We have a back door.
376
00:16:43,654 --> 00:16:46,962
I'll be right back, Jack.
377
00:16:54,622 --> 00:16:56,450
[ motor humming]
378
00:17:01,498 --> 00:17:02,760
After you finish
the fireplace,
379
00:17:02,847 --> 00:17:04,327
start scrubbing
the shower tiles.
380
00:17:04,414 --> 00:17:05,633
and I'll give Jamie a bath,
381
00:17:05,720 --> 00:17:07,200
then we can both
do the gutters.
382
00:17:07,287 --> 00:17:09,593
All right, but first we have
to shampoo the rug
383
00:17:09,680 --> 00:17:11,551
to give it
time to dry.
384
00:17:28,176 --> 00:17:30,484
If you are 99% sure
you turned your oven off,
385
00:17:30,571 --> 00:17:32,355
don't drive
yourself crazy.
386
00:17:32,442 --> 00:17:36,359
Besides, dogs
have an instinct
to run away from fire.
387
00:17:36,446 --> 00:17:38,144
WOMAN:
Whoa!
388
00:17:38,231 --> 00:17:40,015
MAN:
There goes
number three.
389
00:17:40,102 --> 00:17:41,495
And then
there were two.
390
00:17:41,582 --> 00:17:43,323
Don't go anywhere,
folks.
391
00:17:43,410 --> 00:17:45,107
We're going to
be crowning a winner.
392
00:17:45,194 --> 00:17:47,892
So it's just
you and me.
393
00:17:47,979 --> 00:17:51,157
All the little children
have gone home.
394
00:17:51,244 --> 00:17:53,637
You have any kids?
395
00:17:53,724 --> 00:17:55,074
Four.
396
00:17:55,161 --> 00:17:56,640
Five.
397
00:17:56,727 --> 00:17:57,859
Epidurals?
398
00:17:57,946 --> 00:17:59,208
Please.
399
00:17:59,295 --> 00:18:00,644
You tear?
400
00:18:00,731 --> 00:18:03,082
Like an old sock.
401
00:18:03,169 --> 00:18:06,085
All right ladies, it's time
for another bathroom break.
402
00:18:10,306 --> 00:18:11,525
You're not taking
a break, Mabel?
403
00:18:11,612 --> 00:18:13,396
I'm good.
404
00:18:15,268 --> 00:18:16,965
[ chuckles]
405
00:18:19,794 --> 00:18:21,926
Me, too.
406
00:18:31,327 --> 00:18:34,330
♪ Everybody in the party
do the cha-cha♪
407
00:18:34,417 --> 00:18:36,593
♪ Everybody walking down
and feeling cha-cha♪
408
00:18:36,680 --> 00:18:39,074
♪ Hey, muchacha,
give me your cha-cha♪
409
00:18:39,161 --> 00:18:40,989
♪ Cha-cha-cha,
un, dos, tres pa' bailar... ♪
410
00:18:41,076 --> 00:18:43,252
♪ Everybody in the party
do the cha-cha♪
411
00:18:43,339 --> 00:18:45,907
♪ Everybody walking down
and feeling cha-cha♪
412
00:18:45,994 --> 00:18:48,431
♪ Hey, muchacha,
give me your cha-cha♪
413
00:18:48,518 --> 00:18:50,433
♪ Cha-cha-cha,
un, dos, tres pa' bailar... ♪
414
00:18:54,176 --> 00:18:55,612
Hey, Danielle,
before we go out there,
415
00:18:55,699 --> 00:18:57,092
there's something
I need to tell you.
416
00:18:57,179 --> 00:18:58,528
I like you a lot.
417
00:18:58,615 --> 00:18:59,921
You do?
418
00:19:00,008 --> 00:19:01,401
I mean, great.
419
00:19:01,488 --> 00:19:03,185
I know. I never would
have expected it.
420
00:19:04,447 --> 00:19:05,883
[ song ends]
421
00:19:05,970 --> 00:19:07,233
[ crowd cheering]
422
00:19:09,191 --> 00:19:11,846
And now, Malcolm and Danielle!
423
00:19:18,853 --> 00:19:22,596
♪ When marimba rhythms
start to play ♪
424
00:19:22,683 --> 00:19:26,643
♪ Dance with me, make me sway ♪
425
00:19:26,730 --> 00:19:28,776
Why wouldn't you
have expected it?
426
00:19:28,863 --> 00:19:30,604
Huh?
427
00:19:30,691 --> 00:19:33,041
Why wouldn't you have
expected to like me?
428
00:19:33,128 --> 00:19:37,045
♪ Like a flower
bending in the wind ♪
429
00:19:37,132 --> 00:19:40,657
It wasn't a criticism
of you. It's just that...
430
00:19:40,744 --> 00:19:43,704
sometimes I can be really
shallow about these things.
431
00:19:43,791 --> 00:19:45,488
♪ When we dance,
you have a way with me ♪
432
00:19:45,575 --> 00:19:46,794
Malcolm?
433
00:19:46,881 --> 00:19:49,710
♪ Stay with me, sway with me ♪
434
00:19:49,797 --> 00:19:51,494
So what kind of guys
do you like
435
00:19:51,581 --> 00:19:53,801
when you're shallow?
436
00:19:53,888 --> 00:19:57,892
♪ But my eyes see only you ♪
437
00:19:57,979 --> 00:19:59,285
No, it's nothing.
438
00:19:59,372 --> 00:20:00,634
It's just that...
439
00:20:00,721 --> 00:20:02,113
I've made mistakes
in the past
440
00:20:02,201 --> 00:20:03,898
going after guys
just based on their looks.
441
00:20:03,985 --> 00:20:05,769
So you almost didn't go
out with me
442
00:20:05,856 --> 00:20:06,944
because I'm not
good-looking enough?
443
00:20:07,031 --> 00:20:09,512
Would you let it go, okay?
444
00:20:09,599 --> 00:20:10,731
I like you.
445
00:20:10,818 --> 00:20:12,036
Now dip me.
446
00:20:12,123 --> 00:20:13,386
-Face or body?
-What?
447
00:20:13,473 --> 00:20:15,388
Face or body,
which don't you like?
448
00:20:15,475 --> 00:20:16,563
Or maybe you don't
like any of it.
449
00:20:16,650 --> 00:20:18,391
It's all fine.
It's good enough.
450
00:20:18,478 --> 00:20:19,435
-Now dip me.
-I can't believe
you'd think like that.
451
00:20:19,522 --> 00:20:21,220
For God's sakes!
452
00:20:21,307 --> 00:20:22,438
You know,
you're no prize.
453
00:20:22,525 --> 00:20:24,223
[ gasps]
454
00:20:24,310 --> 00:20:27,443
[ humming]
455
00:20:27,530 --> 00:20:29,140
No, we can't let Dad out
456
00:20:29,228 --> 00:20:30,533
until we do everything
on the list.
457
00:20:30,620 --> 00:20:31,578
If Dad's going to act like...
458
00:20:31,665 --> 00:20:32,666
[ all screaming]
459
00:20:32,753 --> 00:20:33,536
I can explain.
460
00:20:33,623 --> 00:20:35,016
Wait a minute.
461
00:20:35,103 --> 00:20:37,323
You've been sneaking out
the whole time?
462
00:20:38,149 --> 00:20:39,238
Is that party mix?
463
00:20:39,325 --> 00:20:41,631
You're damn right
it's party mix.
464
00:20:41,718 --> 00:20:44,068
This is the only thing
that has kept me sane
465
00:20:44,155 --> 00:20:47,376
while I was trapped
in that hellhole.
466
00:20:47,463 --> 00:20:48,769
Then why are you going back?
467
00:20:51,424 --> 00:20:53,904
I am not on trial here.
468
00:20:53,991 --> 00:20:55,819
I can't believe he wasn't
really trapped.
469
00:20:55,906 --> 00:20:57,778
Come on, Dewey, let's go
mess up the house.
470
00:20:57,865 --> 00:20:58,779
[ horn honking]
471
00:20:58,866 --> 00:21:01,347
I did it! I won the truck!
472
00:21:01,434 --> 00:21:03,044
Lois, you're not going
to believe what these
boys have done.
473
00:21:03,131 --> 00:21:04,654
-They trapped me in a hole...
-He wasn't trapped...
474
00:21:04,741 --> 00:21:07,135
[ horn honks]
Did you hear what I said?
475
00:21:07,222 --> 00:21:09,093
I said I won the truck!
476
00:21:09,180 --> 00:21:11,052
-Oh, my God!
-You won the truck!
477
00:21:11,139 --> 00:21:13,315
We won the truck!
We won the truck!
478
00:21:13,402 --> 00:21:14,925
We won the truck!
We won the truck!
479
00:21:15,012 --> 00:21:16,492
Let's go for a ride.
480
00:21:16,579 --> 00:21:19,190
Just a sec.
First I have to change my pants.
481
00:21:59,492 --> 00:22:01,929
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