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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:21,331 --> 00:00:23,161 Okay, so, I know this is my first time 2 00:00:23,166 --> 00:00:24,266 doing therapy in decades, 3 00:00:24,267 --> 00:00:25,335 and, look, I’m nervous, 4 00:00:25,335 --> 00:00:27,804 but, uh, there’s a strong aroma... 5 00:00:27,804 --> 00:00:30,273 Eh, am I recalling a repressed memory? 6 00:00:30,273 --> 00:00:32,242 That’s Resignation and Cautious Hope. 7 00:00:32,242 --> 00:00:33,310 Essential oils. 8 00:00:33,310 --> 00:00:35,210 I have a diffuser. 9 00:00:35,211 --> 00:00:37,080 So, Roberta Songthrush... 10 00:00:37,080 --> 00:00:38,710 ‐It’s Bertie. ‐Bertie. 11 00:00:38,715 --> 00:00:40,215 You’re 31, you work 12 00:00:40,216 --> 00:00:41,316 at a magazine publisher 13 00:00:41,318 --> 00:00:43,053 but run a baking business out of your apartment. 14 00:00:43,053 --> 00:00:45,653 You feel guilty for not composting your kitchen scraps. 15 00:00:45,655 --> 00:00:47,891 You want therapy because you suffer severe panic attacks 16 00:00:47,891 --> 00:00:50,191 brought on by crippling anxiety and lingering trauma. 17 00:00:50,193 --> 00:00:53,063 Standard stuff. Tell me about the people closest to you. 18 00:00:53,063 --> 00:00:54,963 Well, Tuca’s my best friend. 19 00:00:54,965 --> 00:00:56,533 We hang out constantly. 20 00:00:56,533 --> 00:00:58,301 She knows all three of my secrets. 21 00:00:58,301 --> 00:01:00,131 She’s my socialist elected president. 22 00:01:00,136 --> 00:01:02,305 We’re just like this, you know? 23 00:01:02,305 --> 00:01:04,040 Tuca. Got it. Anyone else? 24 00:01:04,040 --> 00:01:05,470 Hmm. Oh, yeah. 25 00:01:05,475 --> 00:01:07,510 Oh, my boyfriend of five years. Speckle. 26 00:01:07,510 --> 00:01:09,779 We live together. 27 00:01:09,779 --> 00:01:12,109 It’s clear that Tuca is a toxic element in your life 28 00:01:12,115 --> 00:01:13,215 and you need to cut her out. 29 00:01:13,216 --> 00:01:15,118 Plus, your names sound wrong together. 30 00:01:15,118 --> 00:01:17,378 Tuca and Bertie. Tuca and Bertie. 31 00:01:17,387 --> 00:01:18,555 Bertie and Tuca? 32 00:01:18,555 --> 00:01:20,123 No, that doesn’t work either. 33 00:01:20,123 --> 00:01:21,223 Tuca and... 34 00:01:21,224 --> 00:01:22,492 ♪ Tuca & Bertie, Tuca & Bertie 35 00:01:22,492 --> 00:01:23,722 ♪ Bertie & Tuca And Tuca & Bertie ♪ 36 00:01:23,727 --> 00:01:25,537 ♪ Tuca & Bertie ♪ 37 00:01:27,297 --> 00:01:28,698 ‐ ♪ Tuca ♪ ‐ ♪ Bertie ♪ 38 00:01:36,573 --> 00:01:39,042 You want me to cut Tuca? 39 00:01:39,042 --> 00:01:40,342 Out of your life, yes. 40 00:01:40,343 --> 00:01:41,643 And ditch the boyfriend, too. 41 00:01:41,645 --> 00:01:44,214 I suggest a full relationship detox. 42 00:01:44,214 --> 00:01:46,082 That’s terrible advice! 43 00:01:46,082 --> 00:01:47,682 What kind of therapist are you? 44 00:01:47,684 --> 00:01:49,624 I specialize in severing attachments. 45 00:01:51,187 --> 00:01:52,622 Didn’t your co‐worker Claudette tell you 46 00:01:52,622 --> 00:01:54,022 when she gave you the referral? 47 00:01:55,225 --> 00:01:56,593 Uh, Claudette didn’t 48 00:01:56,593 --> 00:01:58,293 and, now that I’m thinking about it, 49 00:01:58,294 --> 00:02:00,594 hasn’t otherwise spoken to me in three years. 50 00:02:00,597 --> 00:02:03,007 Mm‐hmm. We felt your energy was negative to her growth. 51 00:02:04,100 --> 00:02:05,200 I’m gonna take off. 52 00:02:05,201 --> 00:02:06,870 Aah! That’s the spirit! 53 00:02:06,870 --> 00:02:09,439 Cut me out of your life! Start fresh! 54 00:02:09,439 --> 00:02:10,969 What a loon! 55 00:02:10,974 --> 00:02:12,474 Right? I mean, who knew 56 00:02:12,475 --> 00:02:14,344 finding a good therapist would be this hard? 57 00:02:14,344 --> 00:02:16,279 What do you need a therapist for? 58 00:02:16,279 --> 00:02:17,439 Just do what I do. 59 00:02:17,447 --> 00:02:19,883 Spew all those bad feelings into a cup, 60 00:02:19,883 --> 00:02:22,118 turn it over, and push it behind the toilet. 61 00:02:28,792 --> 00:02:30,092 I feel great! 62 00:02:30,093 --> 00:02:31,723 I need a professional, Tuca. 63 00:02:31,728 --> 00:02:34,164 You know, if your car’s broken, you go to a mechanic. 64 00:02:34,164 --> 00:02:35,532 Well, my brains are broken. 65 00:02:35,532 --> 00:02:36,732 Speckle planned this nice 66 00:02:36,733 --> 00:02:38,433 anniversary dinner tomorrow night 67 00:02:38,435 --> 00:02:39,869 and it should be no big deal, 68 00:02:39,869 --> 00:02:43,169 but even that’s giving me gut cramps and beak sweats! 69 00:02:43,173 --> 00:02:44,841 I just need to see a good shrink 70 00:02:44,841 --> 00:02:46,641 for like a session or two, then boom! 71 00:02:46,643 --> 00:02:48,578 No more panic attacks! Easy! 72 00:02:48,578 --> 00:02:51,108 Aw, I thought I was your panic mechanic! 73 00:02:51,114 --> 00:02:52,582 I can’t always rely on you. 74 00:02:52,582 --> 00:02:54,982 Plus, you’re busy going on all your dates! 75 00:02:54,984 --> 00:02:56,484 Online dating sucks. 76 00:02:56,486 --> 00:02:58,455 I can’t encapsulate my raw, 77 00:02:58,455 --> 00:03:00,795 enigmatic allure in a profile. 78 00:03:02,892 --> 00:03:04,060 I don’t need more love! 79 00:03:04,060 --> 00:03:06,190 My heart is like a training bra. 80 00:03:06,196 --> 00:03:08,064 You can only fit so much titty in there. 81 00:03:08,064 --> 00:03:09,599 I already love you so much, 82 00:03:09,599 --> 00:03:11,859 I don’t have space in my heart for anyone else. 83 00:03:11,868 --> 00:03:13,937 You’re still wearing training bras? 84 00:03:13,937 --> 00:03:15,071 I’m still learning! 85 00:03:15,071 --> 00:03:16,571 I’m no Dr. Esther Emu 86 00:03:16,573 --> 00:03:20,173 but sounds like you’re denying your emotional needs. 87 00:03:20,176 --> 00:03:21,311 Dr. Esther Emu? 88 00:03:21,311 --> 00:03:23,880 but sounds like you’re denying your emotional needs. 89 00:03:23,880 --> 00:03:26,980 And when he calls you a little baby bird‐child, 90 00:03:26,983 --> 00:03:28,053 how do you feel? 91 00:03:28,251 --> 00:03:31,020 And when he calls you a little baby bird‐child, 92 00:03:32,088 --> 00:03:33,788 Aw, shit, Bertie! We’re in an intersection! 93 00:03:33,790 --> 00:03:35,520 ‐ 94 00:03:35,525 --> 00:03:37,825 I’d see her, but she’s all booked up. 95 00:03:37,827 --> 00:03:39,162 Now how am I supposed to know 96 00:03:39,162 --> 00:03:41,392 which of these other shrinks are any good? 97 00:03:41,397 --> 00:03:43,366 Same deal with these dating sites. 98 00:03:43,366 --> 00:03:45,335 These people either look too outdoorsy, 99 00:03:45,335 --> 00:03:47,604 or way too indoorsy. 100 00:03:47,604 --> 00:03:50,204 I wish I could date a group of people all at once 101 00:03:50,206 --> 00:03:52,876 and eliminate them one by one... 102 00:03:54,144 --> 00:03:55,612 Like a reality show. 103 00:03:55,612 --> 00:03:58,181 Yeah, I wish I could date a bunch of therapists 104 00:03:58,181 --> 00:03:59,449 and then just choose one. 105 00:03:59,449 --> 00:04:00,679 Oh, you can. 106 00:04:00,683 --> 00:04:03,520 You’re free to see as many therapists as you’d like. 107 00:04:03,520 --> 00:04:05,520 Be a cognitive behavioral slut! 108 00:04:05,522 --> 00:04:06,990 Oh, don’t you want me to choose you? 109 00:04:06,990 --> 00:04:09,259 I could be the best therapist in the world 110 00:04:09,259 --> 00:04:11,659 and still not be right for you. 111 00:04:11,661 --> 00:04:14,330 So what’s making you anxious lately? 112 00:04:14,330 --> 00:04:17,100 Oh, you know, just the usual stuff. 113 00:04:17,100 --> 00:04:18,800 Also, Speckle and I 114 00:04:18,802 --> 00:04:20,802 are celebrating our anniversary tomorrow night. 115 00:04:20,804 --> 00:04:23,039 That seems like something you could keep low key. 116 00:04:23,039 --> 00:04:24,239 Too late. 117 00:04:24,240 --> 00:04:26,740 Uh, Bertie. 118 00:04:26,743 --> 00:04:29,579 I got us a spot at Two Twigs, 119 00:04:29,579 --> 00:04:31,339 the hippest new restaurant in Bird Town. 120 00:04:31,347 --> 00:04:33,616 I called every day for a month and it finally worked, 121 00:04:33,616 --> 00:04:36,486 when I abbreviated reservation to res. 122 00:04:36,486 --> 00:04:37,686 Then they knew I was cool. 123 00:04:37,687 --> 00:04:40,490 Uh, that sounds intimidating. 124 00:04:40,490 --> 00:04:42,058 Yup! I can’t wait! 125 00:04:42,959 --> 00:04:45,019 Yup! I can’t wait! 126 00:04:45,028 --> 00:04:46,930 to keep this night from being perfect! 127 00:04:48,798 --> 00:04:52,098 Look, I know it’s silly, but... I can’t stop worrying 128 00:04:52,101 --> 00:04:55,371 I’m gonna have a panic attack and ruin our anniversary. 129 00:04:55,371 --> 00:04:57,501 So what normally happens when you panic? 130 00:04:57,507 --> 00:04:59,142 Well, Speckle and Tuca help me. 131 00:04:59,142 --> 00:05:00,510 Which is terrible. 132 00:05:00,510 --> 00:05:01,810 I’m such a burden on them. 133 00:05:01,811 --> 00:05:03,341 Like if I bomb this dinner, 134 00:05:03,346 --> 00:05:04,914 Speckle will for sure dump me 135 00:05:04,914 --> 00:05:06,549 and get a super chill girlfriend, 136 00:05:06,549 --> 00:05:08,349 and she’ll be Tuca’s new best friend... 137 00:05:08,351 --> 00:05:09,681 I know how to surf. 138 00:05:09,686 --> 00:05:11,454 And I never shit. 139 00:05:13,623 --> 00:05:16,559 Tuca and Speckle haven’t dumped you yet... 140 00:05:16,559 --> 00:05:17,689 But they will. 141 00:05:17,694 --> 00:05:18,928 I’m like a haunted house. 142 00:05:18,928 --> 00:05:20,488 I look charming on the outside, 143 00:05:20,496 --> 00:05:22,632 but the more I let other people in, 144 00:05:22,632 --> 00:05:24,232 the more they’ll see what I’m really like. 145 00:05:24,234 --> 00:05:28,804 And it’ll be too much because I’m freakin’ haunted. 146 00:05:28,805 --> 00:05:30,805 Maybe they wanna go into a haunted house? 147 00:05:30,807 --> 00:05:32,408 And they wanna help? 148 00:05:32,408 --> 00:05:33,768 I’ve got like creepy girls 149 00:05:33,776 --> 00:05:36,379 facing the corner with no face and shit! 150 00:05:36,379 --> 00:05:40,079 You don’t have to fix yourself before letting them in. 151 00:05:40,083 --> 00:05:43,083 Nope. Nope. I didn’t come here to not fix myself. 152 00:05:43,086 --> 00:05:45,186 I could have done that in not‐therapy. 153 00:05:45,188 --> 00:05:47,390 I’m here because I’m fixin’ to get fixed! 154 00:05:47,390 --> 00:05:48,490 If you can’t help me, 155 00:05:48,491 --> 00:05:50,121 I’ll just keep trying other therapists. 156 00:05:50,126 --> 00:05:51,126 Totally cool. 157 00:05:51,127 --> 00:05:53,029 We’ve got 20 minutes left on the clock 158 00:05:53,029 --> 00:05:56,129 so I’m gonna watch pottery fail videos 159 00:05:56,132 --> 00:05:57,702 if you wanna join me. 160 00:06:03,640 --> 00:06:06,609 The pot was so beautiful and now it’s mud. 161 00:06:06,609 --> 00:06:08,909 It’s just freaking mud! 162 00:06:17,720 --> 00:06:19,620 ‐ ‐Y’all here for a date with me? 163 00:06:19,622 --> 00:06:20,690 I sure am! 164 00:06:20,690 --> 00:06:23,520 Oh, I see... I see everyone is. 165 00:06:23,526 --> 00:06:25,428 Wowzers, this is a development! 166 00:06:25,428 --> 00:06:28,488 Well, toot toot, ya crazy romantics! 167 00:06:28,498 --> 00:06:31,567 And get on the Sex Bus! 168 00:06:31,567 --> 00:06:34,570 Uh, I was just waiting for my bus! To go home? 169 00:06:34,570 --> 00:06:36,270 You’re not going home until you compete 170 00:06:36,272 --> 00:06:38,672 for my casual interest, you little cutie. 171 00:06:38,675 --> 00:06:40,175 I have a husband! 172 00:06:40,176 --> 00:06:41,711 All aboard! 173 00:06:43,246 --> 00:06:44,213 Welcome to Sex Bus! 174 00:06:47,951 --> 00:06:50,251 All of you have an equal chance at winning. 175 00:06:50,253 --> 00:06:51,821 Except you. 176 00:06:51,821 --> 00:06:55,091 I’m sorry, I can already tell this isn’t gonna work out. 177 00:06:55,091 --> 00:06:56,759 I’m getting bad vibes right away. 178 00:06:56,759 --> 00:06:59,228 Is it the eyebrow ring? It’s fake. 179 00:06:59,228 --> 00:07:01,228 Uh... and your voice. 180 00:07:01,230 --> 00:07:02,899 Look, I hate to do this... 181 00:07:02,899 --> 00:07:04,499 Well, screw you, Tucaloo! 182 00:07:04,500 --> 00:07:06,700 Come on, I’m a great lady! 183 00:07:06,703 --> 00:07:10,039 Ew, and your personality! Bleh! 184 00:07:10,039 --> 00:07:10,969 It’s all bad. 185 00:07:10,974 --> 00:07:13,574 ‐You’re eliminated. ‐ 186 00:07:13,576 --> 00:07:14,844 But, silver lining, 187 00:07:14,844 --> 00:07:16,612 I need a bus driver! You’re hired. 188 00:07:16,612 --> 00:07:17,942 Maybe, in the end, 189 00:07:17,947 --> 00:07:20,950 you’ll realize it was me you loved all along? 190 00:07:20,950 --> 00:07:23,619 Woof. Definitely not. 191 00:07:28,024 --> 00:07:30,460 There are so many therapists. 192 00:07:30,460 --> 00:07:32,090 How do you choose one? 193 00:07:32,095 --> 00:07:33,235 Ooh. 194 00:07:36,165 --> 00:07:37,805 Argh! 195 00:07:39,469 --> 00:07:41,499 Hey, Claudette. Cute outfit! 196 00:07:42,672 --> 00:07:45,812 Your therapist referral sucked. 197 00:07:47,543 --> 00:07:48,611 Argh! 198 00:07:56,352 --> 00:07:59,022 Bertie, what are you doing? 199 00:08:03,426 --> 00:08:05,361 Bertie! What have you done? 200 00:08:12,935 --> 00:08:15,605 Ah, Bertie, I was just not thinking about you. 201 00:08:15,605 --> 00:08:16,705 How can I help you 202 00:08:16,706 --> 00:08:18,206 and/or get you out of my office quickly? 203 00:08:18,207 --> 00:08:19,075 Hey, Holland! 204 00:08:19,075 --> 00:08:21,344 and/or get you out of my office quickly? 205 00:08:21,344 --> 00:08:22,678 Psychological emergency! 206 00:08:22,678 --> 00:08:24,708 Ah, I’m in full support of employees 207 00:08:24,714 --> 00:08:25,882 taking mental health days. 208 00:08:25,882 --> 00:08:28,882 Cuts down on the number of incidents. 209 00:08:28,885 --> 00:08:30,953 Well, let me know if you have a therapist you like. 210 00:08:30,953 --> 00:08:32,889 ’Cause, uh, I’m on the hunt. 211 00:08:32,889 --> 00:08:35,089 Oh, no, I’m British and over 60. 212 00:08:35,091 --> 00:08:37,760 I’ve never even considered going to a "funny doctor". 213 00:08:37,760 --> 00:08:38,990 I’m very happy. 214 00:08:41,664 --> 00:08:45,034 Okay. Well. See you tomorrow! 215 00:08:45,034 --> 00:08:47,070 Come on, Holly, be a good soldier. 216 00:08:47,070 --> 00:08:49,940 Your ex remarried. She’s happy! 217 00:08:52,708 --> 00:08:53,638 Here’s the deal. 218 00:08:57,046 --> 00:09:00,516 I just want a surefire way to fix panic attacks. 219 00:09:01,317 --> 00:09:02,987 By 6:00 p. m. today. 220 00:09:04,454 --> 00:09:05,721 And, go! 221 00:09:05,721 --> 00:09:07,551 Transitional object work. 222 00:09:07,557 --> 00:09:08,958 Take this crystal. 223 00:09:08,958 --> 00:09:10,658 When you feel anxious, 224 00:09:10,660 --> 00:09:13,160 hold the crystal in your hand. 225 00:09:13,162 --> 00:09:14,062 Can I keep this? 226 00:09:14,063 --> 00:09:15,563 I’ll add it to your bill. 227 00:09:17,467 --> 00:09:20,470 To manually reset your socially neurotic brain, 228 00:09:20,470 --> 00:09:21,400 repeat whatever it is 229 00:09:21,404 --> 00:09:23,339 your conversation partner is saying. 230 00:09:23,339 --> 00:09:25,669 Repeat whatever it is your partner is saying. 231 00:09:25,675 --> 00:09:27,510 Okay. Stop repeating me. 232 00:09:27,510 --> 00:09:28,740 Stop repeating me. 233 00:09:28,744 --> 00:09:31,414 You are a very handsome therapist? 234 00:09:31,414 --> 00:09:33,054 What? 235 00:09:35,585 --> 00:09:37,620 When I feel anxious, 236 00:09:37,620 --> 00:09:41,390 I like to list colors in the room to distract myself. 237 00:09:41,390 --> 00:09:45,420 Blue... Blue... Blue... 238 00:09:45,428 --> 00:09:47,096 ‐Blue. ‐Blue. Mm‐hm. 239 00:09:47,096 --> 00:09:48,896 ‐ 240 00:09:48,898 --> 00:09:50,766 You need to be kinder to yourself. 241 00:09:50,766 --> 00:09:52,535 Like, you’re not a haunted house! 242 00:09:52,535 --> 00:09:55,204 You’re so pretty and cool! 243 00:09:55,204 --> 00:09:57,773 Oh, that was just a metaphor. 244 00:09:57,773 --> 00:10:00,273 And your friend Tuca sounds so fun. 245 00:10:00,276 --> 00:10:02,411 I wish I could hang out with you guys. 246 00:10:02,411 --> 00:10:04,141 Uh... I gotta go. 247 00:10:04,147 --> 00:10:06,087 ‐Thanks! ‐I’ll text you later! 248 00:10:11,354 --> 00:10:12,354 Eek! 249 00:10:28,137 --> 00:10:30,039 Previously on Sex Bus, a lively 250 00:10:30,039 --> 00:10:32,139 portrait painting session showed us that beauty 251 00:10:32,141 --> 00:10:34,541 is in the eye of the brush holder. 252 00:10:36,112 --> 00:10:38,042 Oh, jeez! Sorry! 253 00:10:38,047 --> 00:10:40,416 Ooh, that’s hot. 254 00:10:40,416 --> 00:10:42,726 It’s a pleasure to observe you. 255 00:10:43,986 --> 00:10:45,988 This is technically proficient, 256 00:10:45,988 --> 00:10:48,118 but where’s the soul? The passion? 257 00:10:48,124 --> 00:10:50,194 Sorry, you’re eliminated! 258 00:10:51,160 --> 00:10:54,090 I don’t understand what happened! 259 00:10:55,498 --> 00:10:58,000 How did I get in this limo? 260 00:10:58,000 --> 00:10:59,630 [Deep‐Voiced Man] Round Two got immediately derailed 261 00:10:59,635 --> 00:11:02,772 when someone discovered a bomb on the bus. 262 00:11:02,772 --> 00:11:04,402 Okay, cut the tan wire. 263 00:11:04,407 --> 00:11:06,142 Don’t touch the beige wire! 264 00:11:06,142 --> 00:11:08,542 I don’t see any wires! 265 00:11:08,945 --> 00:11:10,379 Argh! 266 00:11:10,379 --> 00:11:12,239 I don’t know if I can do this! 267 00:11:12,248 --> 00:11:14,984 You can and you must! Just hold her steady! 268 00:11:14,984 --> 00:11:16,352 Straight ahead! 269 00:11:16,352 --> 00:11:21,290 ‐ 270 00:11:21,290 --> 00:11:22,720 Oh! Whoo‐ho! 271 00:11:22,725 --> 00:11:24,193 Fortunately, in the end, 272 00:11:24,193 --> 00:11:26,729 the bomb just turned out to be lip balm. 273 00:11:26,729 --> 00:11:29,329 From our sponsor, Natural Selections. 274 00:11:29,332 --> 00:11:32,432 Finally, a lip balm for animals without lips. 275 00:11:32,435 --> 00:11:34,403 Okay, none of this makes any sense. 276 00:11:34,403 --> 00:11:37,303 You’re eliminated! Get out of here, logic police! 277 00:11:37,306 --> 00:11:39,642 I don’t date cops! Anymore. 278 00:11:41,344 --> 00:11:43,012 And here we are at Round Three, 279 00:11:43,012 --> 00:11:44,342 in which Tuca decides 280 00:11:44,347 --> 00:11:47,750 if a contestant is a good voiceover announcer. 281 00:11:47,750 --> 00:11:49,819 So... 282 00:11:49,819 --> 00:11:51,249 Sorry, it’s a pass. 283 00:11:51,254 --> 00:11:54,290 I’m not attracted to a soothing male baritone. 284 00:11:54,290 --> 00:11:55,958 I wanna be agitated! 285 00:11:55,958 --> 00:11:59,758 "Heartbreak", coming soon to a man that is me! 286 00:12:01,597 --> 00:12:04,300 I don’t think Sheena is here for the right reasons. 287 00:12:04,300 --> 00:12:06,369 But I am and that’s to get to my street. 288 00:12:06,369 --> 00:12:07,969 Oh, here it is! 289 00:12:10,306 --> 00:12:12,508 For the next round, um... 290 00:12:12,508 --> 00:12:15,038 do you gals like, uh... broccoli? 291 00:12:15,044 --> 00:12:16,944 Yeah! I love it! 292 00:12:16,946 --> 00:12:18,016 Wrong answer. 293 00:12:18,914 --> 00:12:20,049 There’s only room 294 00:12:20,049 --> 00:12:21,509 for one broccoli lover in my life 295 00:12:21,517 --> 00:12:23,252 and that’s my best friend Bertie. 296 00:12:23,252 --> 00:12:24,920 ♪ Oh, I’m a big monster ♪ 297 00:12:24,920 --> 00:12:28,520 ♪ Eating tiny trees, tiny trees Tiny trees! ♪ 298 00:12:30,860 --> 00:12:31,960 So, do I... 299 00:12:31,961 --> 00:12:33,361 Oh, no! 300 00:12:34,630 --> 00:12:37,360 I could fix it in a jiffy. I’m, I’m a mechanic. 301 00:12:37,366 --> 00:12:39,302 You’re a sexy say that again? 302 00:12:39,302 --> 00:12:40,632 A mechanic. 303 00:12:40,636 --> 00:12:43,873 It’s like a therapist for your car? 304 00:12:43,873 --> 00:12:45,941 There’s no one in my life who knows how to fix a tire, 305 00:12:45,941 --> 00:12:47,710 even me. 306 00:12:47,710 --> 00:12:49,040 You win Sex Bus! 307 00:12:49,045 --> 00:12:50,645 Nifty. 308 00:12:51,947 --> 00:12:53,249 Is it all over? 309 00:12:53,249 --> 00:12:55,049 Was I a fool to hold out hope? 310 00:12:55,051 --> 00:12:56,181 Yep. 311 00:12:56,185 --> 00:12:58,525 Text me! 312 00:12:59,188 --> 00:13:01,788 Well, howdy there! 313 00:13:04,627 --> 00:13:06,629 Can I actually use any of this? 314 00:13:06,629 --> 00:13:08,889 Crystals... colors... 315 00:13:08,898 --> 00:13:10,733 Turtle! 316 00:13:10,733 --> 00:13:12,463 Ouch! Crud! 317 00:13:12,468 --> 00:13:16,038 Draca? I mean cool. You’re cool. 318 00:13:16,038 --> 00:13:17,838 Hey, where’s my notebook? 319 00:13:18,507 --> 00:13:19,875 Thanks. 320 00:13:19,875 --> 00:13:20,975 Sweet notebook. 321 00:13:20,976 --> 00:13:21,911 What’s in there? 322 00:13:21,911 --> 00:13:24,311 Sweet notebook. 323 00:13:24,313 --> 00:13:25,781 Are you negging me? 324 00:13:25,781 --> 00:13:27,450 You know what, I can’t read your tone 325 00:13:27,450 --> 00:13:29,050 and I don’t have time to figure it out! 326 00:13:29,051 --> 00:13:31,351 We just like milk. 327 00:13:31,354 --> 00:13:32,754 Milk is cool. 328 00:13:32,755 --> 00:13:34,523 If you must know, it’s a list of ways 329 00:13:34,523 --> 00:13:36,292 to prevent an anxiety attack. 330 00:13:36,292 --> 00:13:39,328 Just like, see a mental health professional. 331 00:13:39,328 --> 00:13:42,628 That’s what I’m trying to do! 332 00:13:42,631 --> 00:13:44,661 "Don’t wait. Go grab what you want. 333 00:13:44,667 --> 00:13:47,269 Even if it seems pushy and rude." 334 00:13:47,269 --> 00:13:48,469 Okay, I will! 335 00:13:48,471 --> 00:13:50,271 Thanks, teens! 336 00:13:57,413 --> 00:13:59,749 Wait, I have to see Dr. Esther Emu! 337 00:13:59,749 --> 00:14:02,549 I’m invoking a "psychological emergency"! 338 00:14:02,551 --> 00:14:05,251 ‐Ah, frick. ‐ 339 00:14:05,254 --> 00:14:07,354 "Psychological emergency". 340 00:14:07,356 --> 00:14:08,691 Ah, frick. 341 00:14:08,691 --> 00:14:11,260 You look like you have a hot date, I’m so sorry. 342 00:14:11,260 --> 00:14:12,990 I dress for myself. 343 00:14:12,995 --> 00:14:13,863 Well, I have a hot date, 344 00:14:13,863 --> 00:14:15,731 I need to be there in 15 minutes, 345 00:14:15,731 --> 00:14:17,731 and you have to help me or... or else, I’ll... 346 00:14:19,168 --> 00:14:20,503 steal all your magazines! 347 00:14:20,503 --> 00:14:22,571 Take the magazines. We don’t even buy them. 348 00:14:22,571 --> 00:14:23,771 They just appear. 349 00:14:24,774 --> 00:14:26,242 Whoa. 350 00:14:26,242 --> 00:14:27,742 Oh, go ahead, little bird. 351 00:14:27,743 --> 00:14:29,173 ‐Tell me your problem. ‐ 352 00:14:29,178 --> 00:14:32,214 I need to know the best way to prevent panic attacks. 353 00:14:32,214 --> 00:14:33,614 I’m desperate. 354 00:14:33,616 --> 00:14:36,118 When you start to feel out of control, 355 00:14:36,118 --> 00:14:37,178 close your eyes 356 00:14:37,186 --> 00:14:40,055 When you start to feel out of control, 357 00:14:40,055 --> 00:14:43,859 when the panic attack is over and you’ve survived it. 358 00:14:43,859 --> 00:14:45,519 That’s brilliant! 359 00:14:45,528 --> 00:14:46,996 It works because no one 360 00:14:46,996 --> 00:14:49,064 has ever died from a panic attack. 361 00:14:49,064 --> 00:14:50,699 Yeah, oh, that’s right. 362 00:14:50,699 --> 00:14:53,269 Except everyone who panics while driving. 363 00:14:53,269 --> 00:14:54,969 They all crash and die. 364 00:14:54,970 --> 00:14:56,100 Oh, thank you! 365 00:14:56,105 --> 00:14:57,575 Thank you so much! 366 00:14:59,074 --> 00:15:00,174 I lied. 367 00:15:00,176 --> 00:15:01,376 I dress like this for you. 368 00:15:01,377 --> 00:15:03,112 We’re late for salsa class. 369 00:15:03,112 --> 00:15:04,912 Oh, to heck with salsa. 370 00:15:09,351 --> 00:15:11,651 Now, this is my comfort zone. 371 00:15:11,654 --> 00:15:13,689 Unlike dating! Gee whiz. 372 00:15:13,689 --> 00:15:15,489 But you seem so comfy and cool! 373 00:15:15,491 --> 00:15:18,191 Oh, heck, no, glad I fooled ya! 374 00:15:18,194 --> 00:15:19,094 I’m a wreck! 375 00:15:19,094 --> 00:15:22,531 Oh, heck, no, glad I fooled ya! 376 00:15:22,531 --> 00:15:23,661 I liked it. 377 00:15:23,666 --> 00:15:24,900 Made things low pressure. 378 00:15:24,900 --> 00:15:28,770 Which is bad for tires but great for this gal! 379 00:15:28,771 --> 00:15:31,601 Hold the tire here like that. 380 00:15:31,607 --> 00:15:33,142 At least with all those people on the bus, 381 00:15:33,142 --> 00:15:36,242 I could avoid those first date awkward silences. 382 00:15:36,245 --> 00:15:37,645 Those are the worst. 383 00:15:40,382 --> 00:15:42,952 Maybe they aren’t that bad. 384 00:15:45,988 --> 00:15:47,118 Nifty. 385 00:15:49,592 --> 00:15:52,792 Hi, hi, hi! Sorry! I made it! 386 00:15:52,795 --> 00:15:55,931 Good news! They have vegetable skewers! 387 00:15:55,931 --> 00:15:57,600 Aka food swords! 388 00:15:57,600 --> 00:15:59,930 Aka expectations met! 389 00:16:01,036 --> 00:16:02,705 I’m so happy to be here with you. 390 00:16:02,705 --> 00:16:05,205 This is so special! You’re such a pretty bird! 391 00:16:06,375 --> 00:16:08,911 Sorry, I’m late to take your order... 392 00:16:08,911 --> 00:16:10,841 ‐ ‐I was surfing. 393 00:16:10,846 --> 00:16:14,816 That’s why my feathers are so perfectly wavy. 394 00:16:14,817 --> 00:16:17,520 And don’t ask me where the bathroom is here 395 00:16:17,520 --> 00:16:19,250 because I don’t know. 396 00:16:19,255 --> 00:16:20,555 Because I don’t shit. 397 00:16:21,390 --> 00:16:23,290 Two prix fixe dinners, please. 398 00:16:23,292 --> 00:16:24,960 Great choice. 399 00:16:24,960 --> 00:16:28,530 Imagine the world five minutes in the future. 400 00:16:35,237 --> 00:16:37,907 What’s happening? 401 00:16:37,907 --> 00:16:40,476 Uh, Speckle, I’m feeling a little nervous. 402 00:16:40,476 --> 00:16:41,576 Oh, no. 403 00:16:41,577 --> 00:16:43,012 Do you want me to use the "worry vacuum"? 404 00:16:43,946 --> 00:16:46,315 Do you want me to use the "worry vacuum"? 405 00:16:46,315 --> 00:16:47,715 Just pretend everything is normal. 406 00:16:47,716 --> 00:16:48,984 Tell me about your day. 407 00:16:48,984 --> 00:16:50,352 Well... 408 00:16:50,352 --> 00:16:51,752 Uh, we’ve been busting our tails 409 00:16:51,754 --> 00:16:53,088 getting this proposal done 410 00:16:53,088 --> 00:16:55,018 for the new bathrooms at Bird Town Park... 411 00:16:57,793 --> 00:16:59,428 ‐...and... ‐Mother of... 412 00:16:59,428 --> 00:17:00,788 Uh, are you okay? 413 00:17:00,796 --> 00:17:02,731 Yes! Keep talking! 414 00:17:02,731 --> 00:17:05,961 Okay, well, Len wanted this Brutalist design... 415 00:17:05,968 --> 00:17:07,636 ‐Brutalist? ‐...which meant the toilets 416 00:17:07,636 --> 00:17:09,438 would be shaped like a skeletal box. 417 00:17:09,438 --> 00:17:10,798 Skeletal? 418 00:17:10,806 --> 00:17:11,974 You know, typical Len! 419 00:17:11,974 --> 00:17:13,574 ‐The order paperwork for it... ‐Paperwork? 420 00:17:13,576 --> 00:17:14,776 ...was just murder. 421 00:17:14,777 --> 00:17:16,445 Murder? What the hell? 422 00:17:16,445 --> 00:17:17,645 Yeah, Len sucks. 423 00:17:17,646 --> 00:17:19,246 Oh, yay, food! 424 00:17:19,248 --> 00:17:24,153 Beet salad with red peppers and cherry chunks and stuff. 425 00:17:24,153 --> 00:17:25,953 Oooh! 426 00:17:26,922 --> 00:17:31,322 Red... blood red... red blood... 427 00:17:31,327 --> 00:17:33,696 ‐ ‐Oh, my god, Bertie? 428 00:17:33,696 --> 00:17:36,298 Just ignore me! 429 00:17:36,298 --> 00:17:38,328 Sweetie? Talk to me. 430 00:17:38,334 --> 00:17:40,134 Go away! 431 00:17:40,135 --> 00:17:42,975 Uh, delicious. 432 00:17:50,613 --> 00:17:51,843 Sorry. 433 00:17:52,414 --> 00:17:53,582 I gotta go! 434 00:17:53,582 --> 00:17:55,282 My friend Bertie is in trouble! 435 00:17:55,284 --> 00:17:57,284 Oh, gee! Is she hurt? 436 00:17:57,286 --> 00:18:00,289 Her boyfriend just texted, she’s having a panic attack! 437 00:18:00,289 --> 00:18:02,619 Oh, your poor buddy. Has this happened before? 438 00:18:02,625 --> 00:18:05,894 Oh, yeah. This is a pattern. It repeats weekly. 439 00:18:05,894 --> 00:18:08,794 Uh, then why do you need to go? 440 00:18:08,797 --> 00:18:10,933 Her fella’s there, right? She sounds needy. 441 00:18:10,933 --> 00:18:13,802 Nuh‐uh, I’m the clingy, codependent one. 442 00:18:13,802 --> 00:18:15,002 Bertie’s the sweetest... 443 00:18:15,004 --> 00:18:17,004 Like, okay, if the radio’s on 444 00:18:17,006 --> 00:18:19,642 and there’s some horrible, stupid pop song playing, 445 00:18:19,642 --> 00:18:21,072 Bertie would rather listen to that 446 00:18:21,076 --> 00:18:24,079 than put on something good from her own playlist. 447 00:18:24,079 --> 00:18:26,809 ♪ I’m always gonna love you... 448 00:18:26,815 --> 00:18:28,751 Hundreds of other people in Bird Town 449 00:18:28,751 --> 00:18:31,981 are listening to this same song right now, 450 00:18:31,987 --> 00:18:33,122 and I dunno, 451 00:18:33,122 --> 00:18:34,852 it just makes me feel less alone. 452 00:18:34,857 --> 00:18:36,792 We’re all connected! 453 00:18:36,792 --> 00:18:39,628 Isn’t that the sweetest thing you’ve ever heard? 454 00:18:39,628 --> 00:18:41,288 She’s a freakin’ sweetheart. 455 00:18:41,296 --> 00:18:43,232 A frookin’ sweetie pie, okay? 456 00:18:43,232 --> 00:18:46,132 Okay, okay, I didn’t say she wasn’t sweet. 457 00:18:46,135 --> 00:18:47,935 Are you in love with her or something? 458 00:18:47,936 --> 00:18:49,672 It’s way deeper than that. 459 00:18:49,672 --> 00:18:51,702 She’s my best friend! 460 00:18:52,708 --> 00:18:53,809 You wait here. 461 00:18:53,809 --> 00:18:55,939 Do not follow me in. 462 00:18:55,944 --> 00:18:57,244 Bertie hates meeting new people! 463 00:18:57,246 --> 00:18:58,746 I’m gonna go home. 464 00:18:58,747 --> 00:19:01,050 Why? We were having a good time! 465 00:19:01,050 --> 00:19:02,880 I don’t think you want another person 466 00:19:02,885 --> 00:19:03,952 in your life right now. 467 00:19:03,952 --> 00:19:06,422 I’ve watched you make silly billy excuses 468 00:19:06,422 --> 00:19:09,052 for every contestant you kicked off Sex Bus today. 469 00:19:09,058 --> 00:19:10,859 Seems like you’re using your friend 470 00:19:10,859 --> 00:19:12,759 as another reason to stay alone. 471 00:19:12,761 --> 00:19:14,730 You’re very preachy for a mechanic. 472 00:19:14,730 --> 00:19:16,160 All mechanics are preachy. 473 00:19:16,165 --> 00:19:18,701 Sheesh, people don’t take care of their cars! 474 00:19:18,701 --> 00:19:21,331 Then I guess you’re eliminated! 475 00:19:21,336 --> 00:19:23,106 Whatever you wanna call it. 476 00:19:29,878 --> 00:19:33,478 Bertie. Why don’t you let me in and we can talk? 477 00:19:33,482 --> 00:19:35,212 No, I’m a burden! 478 00:19:35,217 --> 00:19:36,952 You don’t want a rotten old house 479 00:19:36,952 --> 00:19:39,352 full of banshees and babadooks! 480 00:19:39,354 --> 00:19:42,424 Maybe Speckle and Tuca like helping you. 481 00:19:42,424 --> 00:19:44,693 Huh? Dr. Joanne? 482 00:19:44,693 --> 00:19:47,463 They love you because of who you are, 483 00:19:47,463 --> 00:19:50,532 you don’t have to fix yourself before letting them in. 484 00:19:50,532 --> 00:19:51,600 Bertie! 485 00:19:51,600 --> 00:19:53,800 Oh, colonial shutters. 486 00:19:53,802 --> 00:19:55,632 You’re such a cool house, Bertie! 487 00:19:55,637 --> 00:19:57,539 Speckle is an architect. 488 00:19:57,539 --> 00:19:59,808 He loves getting inside crappy old houses 489 00:19:59,808 --> 00:20:00,868 to fix them up. 490 00:20:00,976 --> 00:20:03,946 He loves getting inside crappy old houses 491 00:20:03,946 --> 00:20:06,115 Maybe they don’t mind that I’m haunted. 492 00:20:06,115 --> 00:20:08,815 ♪ I’m always gonna love you... 493 00:20:08,817 --> 00:20:12,821 Wait, I love this song. 494 00:20:12,821 --> 00:20:14,951 ‐Tuca! ‐See, you’re okay! 495 00:20:14,957 --> 00:20:16,291 You’re not alone. 496 00:20:16,291 --> 00:20:17,591 I’m your panic mechanic! 497 00:20:17,593 --> 00:20:19,523 I always know what you need. 498 00:20:19,528 --> 00:20:20,796 And I texted Tuca. 499 00:20:20,796 --> 00:20:23,432 The important thing is we all helped equally! 500 00:20:23,432 --> 00:20:24,432 Aw... 501 00:20:30,239 --> 00:20:32,239 Uh, just following your lead, babe, 502 00:20:32,241 --> 00:20:35,441 but if we leave now, I don’t have to pay for parking. 503 00:20:35,444 --> 00:20:36,514 Let’s bounce! 504 00:20:38,247 --> 00:20:40,117 Ugh! 505 00:20:43,852 --> 00:20:45,821 Uh, what’s happening? 506 00:20:45,821 --> 00:20:47,451 What is this sensation? 507 00:20:47,456 --> 00:20:50,926 Uh, it feels like I’m surfing a killer wave 508 00:20:50,926 --> 00:20:52,961 inside my own body? 509 00:20:52,961 --> 00:20:55,061 Is this... Am I... 510 00:20:55,063 --> 00:20:59,203 ...shitting? 511 00:21:05,607 --> 00:21:08,677 Boom! Anniversary ambiance! 512 00:21:08,677 --> 00:21:10,979 Okay, four pickles? 513 00:21:10,979 --> 00:21:12,879 Pfft, this is way better than that stuffy restaurant. 514 00:21:12,881 --> 00:21:14,950 I’m sorry about tonight, Speckle. 515 00:21:14,950 --> 00:21:17,880 You know, I tried so hard to avoid having a panic attack, 516 00:21:17,886 --> 00:21:20,088 it’s like I guaranteed it to happen! 517 00:21:20,088 --> 00:21:21,518 I just don’t want you to feel like 518 00:21:21,523 --> 00:21:22,953 you have to suffer alone, okay? 519 00:21:22,958 --> 00:21:24,493 I love sitting under tables with you. 520 00:21:24,493 --> 00:21:27,563 I’m down to build a table fort at literally any moment. 521 00:21:27,563 --> 00:21:30,933 I think I’m gonna keep seeing this therapist, Dr. Joanne, 522 00:21:30,933 --> 00:21:32,363 and work on this stuff with her. 523 00:21:32,367 --> 00:21:35,003 You found a therapist you like? That’s great! 524 00:21:35,003 --> 00:21:37,239 What about you, Tuca? Did you like your date? 525 00:21:37,239 --> 00:21:39,039 I didn’t find the person or anything, 526 00:21:39,041 --> 00:21:42,571 but it was still... nifty. 527 00:21:42,578 --> 00:21:44,847 I’m going upstairs. 528 00:21:44,847 --> 00:21:48,050 Let you guys have some alone time. 529 00:21:48,050 --> 00:21:50,750 Thanks, Tuca. We love you. 530 00:21:50,752 --> 00:21:52,582 Mm‐hm. 531 00:21:52,588 --> 00:21:54,623 You looked handsome tonight. 532 00:21:54,623 --> 00:21:56,123 I know, right? 533 00:22:04,266 --> 00:22:06,136 Bleh! 534 00:22:14,877 --> 00:22:19,014 ♪ You’re caught off guard ♪ 535 00:22:19,014 --> 00:22:22,084 ♪ And maybe you’ve fallen off ♪ 536 00:22:22,084 --> 00:22:24,384 ♪ Please don’t let them ♪ 537 00:22:24,386 --> 00:22:29,656 ♪ Make you think Any less of it ♪ 538 00:22:29,658 --> 00:22:32,961 ♪ You’re caught off guard ♪ 539 00:22:32,961 --> 00:22:36,131 ♪ And maybe you’ve fallen off ♪ 540 00:22:36,131 --> 00:22:38,400 ♪ Please don’t let them ♪ 541 00:22:38,400 --> 00:22:43,170 ♪ Make you change Your end place ♪ 542 00:22:44,907 --> 00:22:47,643 Blue, Blue. 543 00:22:47,643 --> 00:22:51,043 Blue, Blue, Blue. 36371

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