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Edited at https://subtitletools.com
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00:00:15,500 --> 00:00:19,500
This programme contains strong
language and scenes of a sexual
nature.
3
00:00:42,100 --> 00:00:46,100
STIRRING ORGAN MUSIC
4
00:00:59,340 --> 00:01:03,340
MUSIC SWELLS TO FINALE
5
00:01:05,180 --> 00:01:09,180
LOUD BANG
6
00:01:09,380 --> 00:01:13,380
INTENSE TECHNO MUSIC
7
00:01:34,420 --> 00:01:38,420
MUSIC CONTINUES
8
00:01:52,580 --> 00:01:56,580
DRUM 'N' BASS SOUNDS CONTINUE
9
00:02:32,580 --> 00:02:36,580
ELECTRONIC BEATS CONTINUE
10
00:02:39,220 --> 00:02:40,780
Ho-ooo!
11
00:02:40,780 --> 00:02:43,180
Pretty good fella,
but not good enough.
12
00:02:43,180 --> 00:02:43,820
Homo!
13
00:02:43,820 --> 00:02:45,300
Homo!
Yeah, because I rule, basically...
14
00:02:45,300 --> 00:02:48,340
Shit bender.
Ah, Kelly, you're stankin'!
15
00:02:48,340 --> 00:02:50,820
What about you, you sweaty fuck!
16
00:02:50,820 --> 00:02:54,820
Aargh! Get away, you scummer.
17
00:02:55,020 --> 00:02:59,020
Later then!
18
00:02:59,860 --> 00:03:03,860
What you think of that, then?
19
00:03:04,140 --> 00:03:08,140
Tone?
20
00:03:09,700 --> 00:03:12,020
What?
21
00:03:12,020 --> 00:03:14,060
Think of what?
22
00:03:14,060 --> 00:03:18,060
The moves...
Me, Jonno and Kel worked it out.
23
00:03:22,020 --> 00:03:26,020
It's OK.
24
00:03:43,820 --> 00:03:45,100
HORN BLARES
25
00:03:45,100 --> 00:03:48,460
Hey! Nothing to worry
about, dude. Yeah?
26
00:03:48,460 --> 00:03:52,460
Yeah.
27
00:03:56,180 --> 00:04:00,060
It's all right.
28
00:04:00,060 --> 00:04:04,060
Everything's cool.
29
00:04:05,260 --> 00:04:09,260
# I want you to know,
when I look in your eyes... #
30
00:04:14,780 --> 00:04:16,500
Hi, Maxxie. Hey.
31
00:04:16,500 --> 00:04:18,620
ALL: Hi.
32
00:04:18,620 --> 00:04:19,820
Who's that?
33
00:04:19,820 --> 00:04:22,300
That's Tony.
34
00:04:22,300 --> 00:04:26,300
Hey! What's up with you?
35
00:04:27,820 --> 00:04:29,980
I had a traumatic subdural haematoma
36
00:04:29,980 --> 00:04:32,620
with motor and
perceptional complications.
37
00:04:32,620 --> 00:04:34,300
Are you mental?
38
00:04:34,300 --> 00:04:37,060
Yes.
39
00:04:37,060 --> 00:04:38,780
I'd still give you one.
40
00:04:38,780 --> 00:04:41,100
Totally. He's well fit.
Yeah, Queenie?
41
00:04:41,100 --> 00:04:44,380
Yeah. He's buff.
42
00:04:44,380 --> 00:04:47,060
Hey come on, Tone.
See you later, girls.
43
00:04:47,060 --> 00:04:51,060
See you Maxxie! Bye!
44
00:04:51,220 --> 00:04:53,180
I wanna give Maxxie one.
45
00:04:53,180 --> 00:04:56,300
You can't. He's homosexual.
46
00:04:56,300 --> 00:04:59,820
Bummer.
47
00:05:02,820 --> 00:05:06,180
Thanks.
48
00:05:06,180 --> 00:05:09,060
You've grown, Tony.
49
00:05:09,060 --> 00:05:12,820
And there's another two
inches in you, easy.
50
00:05:12,820 --> 00:05:14,860
How's your Mum?
51
00:05:14,860 --> 00:05:17,660
I don't remember you.
52
00:05:17,660 --> 00:05:19,940
Oh, well.
We used to have lovely chats
53
00:05:19,940 --> 00:05:21,980
when I was cleaning your mum's place.
54
00:05:21,980 --> 00:05:24,460
You were such a clever little lad.
55
00:05:24,460 --> 00:05:26,140
I'm stupid now.
56
00:05:26,140 --> 00:05:27,660
No.
57
00:05:27,660 --> 00:05:31,660
Here you go, mate.
58
00:05:33,140 --> 00:05:35,140
Thanks, Mum.
59
00:05:35,140 --> 00:05:37,540
Oh, we used to giggle.
60
00:05:37,540 --> 00:05:41,540
Well, you never did know what
your mum was going to say next.
61
00:05:41,740 --> 00:05:43,820
Ketchup, Mum?
62
00:05:43,820 --> 00:05:46,100
Yeah, right.
63
00:05:46,100 --> 00:05:48,980
Bloody hilarious jokes she told.
64
00:05:48,980 --> 00:05:52,980
Filthy.
Oh, a right laugh, your mum.
65
00:06:00,140 --> 00:06:03,820
Mum? >
66
00:06:03,820 --> 00:06:07,820
I need to pee.
67
00:06:09,740 --> 00:06:12,140
I can manage it myself usually.
68
00:06:12,140 --> 00:06:16,140
Yeah, sorry.
69
00:06:16,420 --> 00:06:18,420
ALARM SOUNDS
70
00:06:18,420 --> 00:06:22,420
Oh, fucking... fucking...
fucking thing!
71
00:06:39,740 --> 00:06:42,100
Oh! Ooh.
72
00:06:42,100 --> 00:06:43,460
Oooh!
73
00:06:43,460 --> 00:06:47,460
Ooh la la!
74
00:06:50,700 --> 00:06:52,780
# One, two, three, go
75
00:06:52,780 --> 00:06:55,980
# Move your feet,
we're going for a ride, yee-ha!
76
00:06:55,980 --> 00:06:59,980
# Dip your hat
and lean from side to side
77
00:07:00,620 --> 00:07:02,700
# Kick up those heels
and hit the floor
78
00:07:02,700 --> 00:07:04,100
# Take the wheel, go round for more
79
00:07:04,100 --> 00:07:08,100
# Nothing's gonna stop
my Friday night
80
00:07:08,140 --> 00:07:12,140
# Cos Friday night
is made for dancing
81
00:07:12,220 --> 00:07:15,860
# Cos Friday night is made for fun
82
00:07:15,860 --> 00:07:19,340
# My Friday night is for romancing
83
00:07:19,340 --> 00:07:23,340
# My Friday night, my Friday night
has just begun.
84
00:07:27,060 --> 00:07:31,060
Yee-ha!
85
00:07:37,260 --> 00:07:41,260
Oi, look out.
Here comes Batty Boy. >
86
00:07:42,100 --> 00:07:44,740
You wanna watch it, Dale.
He'll slip you a big fat cock!
87
00:07:44,740 --> 00:07:46,780
No fucking way, man!
88
00:07:46,780 --> 00:07:49,340
Cockety-cock-cock!
89
00:07:49,340 --> 00:07:53,180
Or he'll slurp you a big fat cock!
90
00:07:53,180 --> 00:07:56,620
A big fucking cock, yeah.
He'll be like, "All right, my lover!"
91
00:07:56,620 --> 00:08:00,220
and wank you silly all over his face
and then tie you up and shoving
92
00:08:00,220 --> 00:08:02,900
right up your arse
93
00:08:02,900 --> 00:08:06,460
and you wouldn't be able to fucking
stop him cos it's fucking torture.
94
00:08:06,460 --> 00:08:10,460
You're shrieking and...
95
00:08:14,820 --> 00:08:17,460
I'm just saying fucking homos,
though, innit?
96
00:08:17,460 --> 00:08:18,820
Yeah, fucking homos.
97
00:08:18,820 --> 00:08:20,620
Fuck 'em. We'll fuck them up.
98
00:08:20,620 --> 00:08:21,660
Fuckin' queers! >
99
00:08:21,660 --> 00:08:23,140
Lads...
100
00:08:23,140 --> 00:08:25,780
Yeah, fuckin' 'omos! >
101
00:08:25,780 --> 00:08:26,900
Nice one, Taz!
102
00:08:26,900 --> 00:08:29,260
Hey, Taz!
103
00:08:29,260 --> 00:08:30,500
All right, love?
104
00:08:30,500 --> 00:08:34,500
Tea's ready.
105
00:08:35,100 --> 00:08:36,500
Nice routine, Dad.
106
00:08:36,500 --> 00:08:39,940
Nice? It's gonna fucking
slay them at the regionals.
107
00:08:39,940 --> 00:08:42,660
Cool.
108
00:08:42,660 --> 00:08:46,020
I just wanted to ask, is it OK if
I drop out of my A-levels and...?
109
00:08:46,020 --> 00:08:49,300
Come back? >
110
00:08:49,300 --> 00:08:53,300
I wanna leave college and
audition for musicals in London.
111
00:08:57,660 --> 00:09:01,660
You're getting qualifications and
you're coming to me on the building.
112
00:09:01,820 --> 00:09:05,060
But how's a history A-level
gonna help me be a builder?
113
00:09:05,060 --> 00:09:06,980
You'll be an educated builder.
114
00:09:06,980 --> 00:09:09,620
Dad, I want to be a dancer.
115
00:09:09,620 --> 00:09:12,860
They have dancing every Thursday
down the centre. You love that. >
116
00:09:13,460 --> 00:09:15,340
Pastimes.
That's what we're into.
117
00:09:15,340 --> 00:09:16,140
Dad...
118
00:09:16,140 --> 00:09:17,780
Dad...
The rest isn't for us.
119
00:09:17,780 --> 00:09:20,020
Get the dog.
120
00:09:20,020 --> 00:09:24,020
Taz.
121
00:09:30,220 --> 00:09:34,220
(THEY SNIGGER)
122
00:09:35,780 --> 00:09:38,460
Fucking turd burglar.
123
00:09:38,460 --> 00:09:40,140
Watch out, Dale. >
124
00:09:40,140 --> 00:09:40,740
Fucking dog!
125
00:09:40,740 --> 00:09:43,620
Fucking dog!
Quiet, boy.
You got something to say, kidder?
126
00:09:43,620 --> 00:09:46,860
Say what I like.
Free country, innit?
127
00:09:46,860 --> 00:09:50,460
Fair point.
But here's my suggestion, son.
128
00:09:50,460 --> 00:09:54,460
You tell your Dad what
you said to Walter Oliver.
129
00:09:55,100 --> 00:09:59,100
All right, my lover?
130
00:10:01,540 --> 00:10:05,540
Lads...
131
00:10:10,740 --> 00:10:12,340
You got fucked up, man!
132
00:10:12,340 --> 00:10:16,340
Big, big time.
133
00:10:28,660 --> 00:10:31,300
Sid?
134
00:10:31,300 --> 00:10:33,380
Sid!
135
00:10:33,380 --> 00:10:35,300
Sid!
136
00:10:35,300 --> 00:10:37,740
Tony?
137
00:10:37,740 --> 00:10:41,260
I need to pee.
138
00:10:41,260 --> 00:10:43,380
My hands don't work.
139
00:10:43,380 --> 00:10:47,380
Well, I always sorted you
out when you were a baby.
140
00:10:48,140 --> 00:10:52,140
I got to register for college,
sign my name on a form.
141
00:10:53,300 --> 00:10:55,580
But my head's forgotten bits of me.
142
00:10:55,580 --> 00:10:58,340
All sorts of bits...
143
00:10:58,340 --> 00:11:01,940
Give it time, love.
144
00:11:01,940 --> 00:11:04,020
Just...
145
00:11:04,020 --> 00:11:05,140
I can aim.
146
00:11:05,140 --> 00:11:09,140
Right...
147
00:11:18,780 --> 00:11:22,380
URINE TRICKLES
148
00:11:22,380 --> 00:11:25,020
URINE CONTINUES TO FLOW
149
00:11:25,020 --> 00:11:29,020
(SNIGGERS)
150
00:11:39,540 --> 00:11:42,180
Oh, bloody hell, Tone!
151
00:11:42,180 --> 00:11:45,580
You always did make me laugh.
152
00:11:45,580 --> 00:11:47,260
You're making me miss.
153
00:11:47,260 --> 00:11:51,260
You and every other bloke
in this sodding house.
154
00:11:54,260 --> 00:11:58,260
FLOW STOPS
155
00:11:59,820 --> 00:12:03,820
Whatever happened
to that nice lass you had?
156
00:12:06,420 --> 00:12:10,420
Oh, my God! OK, watch this! Watch
this you bunch of pussy-fuckers, OK?
157
00:12:10,700 --> 00:12:14,460
One, two, three. Go!
158
00:12:14,460 --> 00:12:18,460
Oh, my God!
159
00:12:24,580 --> 00:12:26,180
We on the right floor?
160
00:12:26,180 --> 00:12:27,620
Dunno, do I?
161
00:12:27,620 --> 00:12:30,060
All right...angry boots.
162
00:12:30,060 --> 00:12:31,820
I want to get ready
for the party.
163
00:12:31,820 --> 00:12:34,260
Well, that'll take all of
about 30 seconds.
164
00:12:34,260 --> 00:12:36,060
I get ready. I dress up.
165
00:12:36,060 --> 00:12:39,620
Nah...that's what we love
about you, Jal... Unstudied.
166
00:12:39,620 --> 00:12:43,620
Fucking hell... I dress up!
167
00:12:44,060 --> 00:12:48,060
Is this the door?
168
00:12:50,140 --> 00:12:54,140
Whoa.
169
00:13:00,700 --> 00:13:02,900
You don't see that every day.
170
00:13:02,900 --> 00:13:05,300
It's open!
171
00:13:05,300 --> 00:13:08,620
That'll be Sid.
He's gonna take me home.
172
00:13:08,620 --> 00:13:12,460
Oh...Chris...Jalander.
173
00:13:14,980 --> 00:13:18,540
Came just at the right time.
174
00:13:18,540 --> 00:13:20,020
Right...
175
00:13:20,020 --> 00:13:24,020
Where's Sid?
176
00:13:24,860 --> 00:13:25,900
Ah! Hi, guys.
177
00:13:29,460 --> 00:13:31,020
Where'd you lot spring from?
178
00:13:31,020 --> 00:13:33,300
Just finished seeing to Tony.
179
00:13:33,300 --> 00:13:35,460
Yeah. She was...
180
00:13:35,460 --> 00:13:36,740
seeing to him...
181
00:13:36,740 --> 00:13:39,700
Great. How are you, lad?
182
00:13:39,700 --> 00:13:41,900
Better, thanks.
She's got warm hands.
183
00:13:41,900 --> 00:13:44,180
Oh, they're lovely and warm.
Always say that.
184
00:13:44,180 --> 00:13:47,860
(MOUTHS SILENTLY)
185
00:13:47,860 --> 00:13:51,300
So you're all dancing
the night away tonight, huh?
186
00:13:51,300 --> 00:13:52,940
Yeah...bit of a party!
187
00:13:52,940 --> 00:13:54,660
It's not really a party.
188
00:13:54,660 --> 00:13:57,260
Yeah, that's right.
189
00:13:57,260 --> 00:14:01,260
What party?
190
00:14:08,340 --> 00:14:11,540
Look, sorry, Tone. But your mum
says we gotta take you home.
191
00:14:11,540 --> 00:14:14,500
Maybe your folks think it's
a bit too soon to be going out.
192
00:14:14,500 --> 00:14:18,420
Fuck my folks.
193
00:14:18,420 --> 00:14:21,300
Where's Sid?
194
00:14:21,300 --> 00:14:23,820
He couldn't make it, mate.
195
00:14:23,820 --> 00:14:26,340
His dad made him stay in and...
196
00:14:26,340 --> 00:14:27,180
Mow the grass. >
197
00:14:27,180 --> 00:14:30,260
Yeah, that's it.
He's mowing the grass.
198
00:14:30,260 --> 00:14:32,020
He couldn't make it, Tony. >
199
00:14:32,020 --> 00:14:36,020
All right?
Sid couldn't make it... >
200
00:14:52,500 --> 00:14:56,500
# Where are you now
201
00:14:57,260 --> 00:15:00,900
# Mr Sensation... #
202
00:15:00,900 --> 00:15:04,900
BIRDSONG ON TV
203
00:15:07,020 --> 00:15:10,340
'Hey! Hi, Sid!
When are you coming to see me?
204
00:15:10,340 --> 00:15:13,100
'Everyone's so lovely in Elgin.
205
00:15:13,100 --> 00:15:16,660
'Here's my new friends,
Rory and Lachlan.
206
00:15:16,660 --> 00:15:18,820
'All right, wee man?
207
00:15:20,220 --> 00:15:22,620
'Rory's going to let me
blow his chanter later.
208
00:15:22,620 --> 00:15:24,980
'It's easy.
Ye just need to learn tae finger it.
209
00:15:24,980 --> 00:15:27,420
'And I've already been
beating Lachlan's bodhran.
210
00:15:27,420 --> 00:15:28,460
'And I've already been
beating Lachlan's bodhran.
'Magic! Aye!'
211
00:15:28,460 --> 00:15:28,980
What?!
212
00:15:28,980 --> 00:15:30,420
What?!
213
00:15:32,300 --> 00:15:36,300
'Anyway, there's a present in there,
Sid. And watch what I can do.
214
00:15:38,620 --> 00:15:42,620
BAGPIPE PLAYS
215
00:16:11,060 --> 00:16:15,060
Mighty fucking Scotland.
216
00:16:21,140 --> 00:16:24,140
Don't you care what I want?!
Don't I get to decide?
217
00:16:24,140 --> 00:16:27,860
Yeah. You're gonna decide to be a
builder who dances in his spare time.
218
00:16:27,860 --> 00:16:29,420
I don't want to be
a fucking builder!
219
00:16:29,420 --> 00:16:30,500
What's wrong with it?
220
00:16:30,500 --> 00:16:32,260
Nothing. Nothing.
221
00:16:32,260 --> 00:16:36,260
I just... I can do this, Dad!
222
00:16:37,540 --> 00:16:40,020
You don't think I can do it, do you?
223
00:16:40,020 --> 00:16:41,180
No, lad.
224
00:16:41,180 --> 00:16:45,180
Fucking hell! Thanks, Dad.
225
00:16:45,300 --> 00:16:46,140
It's not my fault, is it!?
226
00:16:46,140 --> 00:16:47,180
It's not my fault, is it!?
What?
227
00:16:47,180 --> 00:16:49,740
That you're stuck in a fucking
white van all your life.
228
00:16:49,740 --> 00:16:53,380
Don't you speak to me like that! I'll
clout you round the fucking earhole.
229
00:16:53,380 --> 00:16:54,940
Like you clout the fucking dog?!
230
00:16:54,940 --> 00:16:56,860
Don't bring the fucking dog into it.
231
00:16:56,860 --> 00:16:59,420
I'll have no fucking
swearing in this house.
232
00:16:59,420 --> 00:17:03,420
at you all the time.
233
00:17:05,860 --> 00:17:07,220
Don't wait.
234
00:17:07,220 --> 00:17:09,060
We said we'd take you home.
235
00:17:09,060 --> 00:17:11,500
Don't wanna go home.
236
00:17:11,500 --> 00:17:14,300
# Groove upon the party
237
00:17:14,300 --> 00:17:17,460
# Yo, when I'm cruising
in my Lamborghini
238
00:17:17,460 --> 00:17:21,460
# The chicks see me, they go,
"Mmm, wow, he's so sexy"
239
00:17:22,860 --> 00:17:26,140
# And I might get my shot
for the end of the night
240
00:17:26,140 --> 00:17:30,140
# Cos pussy is pussy and baby,
you're pussy for life
241
00:17:30,260 --> 00:17:34,260
# I wanna fuck you, fuck you
You already know
242
00:17:36,180 --> 00:17:38,540
# I wanna fuck you, fuck you... #
243
00:17:38,540 --> 00:17:40,860
Argh! Ow!
244
00:17:40,860 --> 00:17:42,900
Oh... Fuckin' hell...
245
00:17:42,900 --> 00:17:44,740
Sorry. >
246
00:17:44,740 --> 00:17:47,540
I gotta remember
to stand pimp in these.
247
00:17:48,820 --> 00:17:51,820
I'm in for some serious slippy-slidey
todger action at this party, man!
248
00:17:51,820 --> 00:17:55,060
It's not...really a party.
249
00:17:55,060 --> 00:17:59,060
Are you pissing me? It's the biggest
night of the year. Everybody's going!
250
00:17:59,540 --> 00:18:00,380
Yeah, except Tony.
251
00:18:00,380 --> 00:18:01,420
Yeah, except Tony.
Yeah? >
252
00:18:01,420 --> 00:18:03,500
Shame, man. It's gonna be...
253
00:18:03,500 --> 00:18:06,820
Huh! Wah! Chugga-chugga-wah! Hit me!
254
00:18:06,820 --> 00:18:08,540
Ow!
255
00:18:08,540 --> 00:18:12,540
Tony can't go. Remember?
256
00:18:12,820 --> 00:18:14,740
Fuckers...
257
00:18:14,740 --> 00:18:17,060
Yeah...
258
00:18:21,140 --> 00:18:23,860
I told you to keep quiet
about the sodding rave.
259
00:18:23,860 --> 00:18:25,780
And why are you dressed
as a crack dealer?
260
00:18:25,780 --> 00:18:27,500
You think it's too much?
261
00:18:27,500 --> 00:18:28,820
If I'd just met you, Anwar,
262
00:18:28,820 --> 00:18:30,980
I'd rather slit my wrists
than give you one.
263
00:18:30,980 --> 00:18:33,260
That's because you don't
give anyone one. Yeah?
264
00:18:33,260 --> 00:18:35,300
Watch out or they'll take
your tits into care.
265
00:18:35,300 --> 00:18:36,340
Watch out or they'll take
your tits into care.
Huh?
266
00:18:36,340 --> 00:18:39,020
Because they don't get out enough.
267
00:18:39,020 --> 00:18:43,020
You geddit? Your tits...
268
00:18:44,500 --> 00:18:48,340
Hello, Mr Stonem.
269
00:18:48,340 --> 00:18:52,340
Wondered where you were.
270
00:18:54,740 --> 00:18:56,020
Thanks for bringing him back.
271
00:18:56,020 --> 00:18:59,540
Thanks for bringing him back.
That's all right.
No problem. Maybe we'll pop round...
272
00:18:59,540 --> 00:19:03,460
tomorrow.
273
00:19:03,460 --> 00:19:07,460
Let's go get fucked.
274
00:19:10,260 --> 00:19:13,500
Are you not going
to have anything, Tony? >
275
00:19:13,500 --> 00:19:15,260
No.
276
00:19:15,260 --> 00:19:17,500
OK.
277
00:19:17,500 --> 00:19:19,460
So, um, what did you get up to today?
278
00:19:19,460 --> 00:19:20,860
So, um, what did you get up to today?
He shouldn't be going out!
279
00:19:20,860 --> 00:19:22,700
I mean, he's wandering
around, God knows where...
280
00:19:22,700 --> 00:19:23,780
I mean, he's wandering
around, God knows where...
Jim...
281
00:19:23,780 --> 00:19:27,460
We don't even know who he's with!
He could have a bleed or a fit or...
282
00:19:27,460 --> 00:19:30,740
Yeah, Jim. He's here.
283
00:19:30,740 --> 00:19:33,820
Oh, fuck it.
284
00:19:33,820 --> 00:19:35,260
Fuck it.
285
00:19:35,260 --> 00:19:36,380
Fuck it.
286
00:19:36,380 --> 00:19:39,420
All right, all right. Just...
for Christ's sake, eat something!
287
00:19:39,420 --> 00:19:40,940
Look, Mum's made it easy.
288
00:19:40,940 --> 00:19:43,620
It's all...lovely and...
289
00:19:43,620 --> 00:19:47,620
bite-sized.
290
00:19:49,860 --> 00:19:51,940
Oh, sorry, sorry, sorry.
291
00:19:51,940 --> 00:19:54,740
Come on, let's talk about
something else. Come on.
292
00:19:54,740 --> 00:19:58,740
Yeah, yeah.
What do you want to talk about?
293
00:19:59,100 --> 00:20:00,700
Dirty jokes.
294
00:20:00,700 --> 00:20:01,660
What?
295
00:20:01,660 --> 00:20:03,860
Maxxie's mum says
your jokes are filthy.
296
00:20:03,860 --> 00:20:06,900
You saw Jackie Oliver today?
297
00:20:06,900 --> 00:20:10,820
Jackie probably was thinking
about someone else. Right, Anthea?
298
00:20:10,820 --> 00:20:14,820
Yeah, yeah...
299
00:20:15,860 --> 00:20:19,860
Anyway... This mate of mine's
been going to the doctor.
300
00:20:19,900 --> 00:20:21,060
Who's that?
301
00:20:21,060 --> 00:20:24,380
Er, don't think you know him.
Um, anyway he had to have some tests,
302
00:20:24,380 --> 00:20:27,660
had palpitations or something...
So, he eventually goes back
303
00:20:27,660 --> 00:20:30,540
to the doctor to get the results
and, er, the doctor says,
304
00:20:30,540 --> 00:20:34,020
"Sit down. I'm afraid there's
good news and there's bad news.
305
00:20:34,020 --> 00:20:36,860
"The bad news is
you've only got a month to live."
306
00:20:36,860 --> 00:20:39,660
My mate's like,
devastated, he's gutted.
307
00:20:39,660 --> 00:20:43,660
But he pulls himself together and
he says, "What's the good news?"
308
00:20:44,260 --> 00:20:46,700
And the doctor says,
"See my new receptionist?
309
00:20:46,700 --> 00:20:48,460
"Blonde. Great arse. Huge tits.
310
00:20:48,460 --> 00:20:52,460
"Well, I'm fucking her."
311
00:20:55,500 --> 00:20:58,300
That's crap.
312
00:20:58,300 --> 00:21:00,780
Yeah...
313
00:21:00,780 --> 00:21:03,340
My name's Anthea Stonem.
Thank you and good night.
314
00:21:03,340 --> 00:21:07,340
(GIGGLES UNCONTROLLABLY)
315
00:21:10,260 --> 00:21:13,060
They'll take her tits into care...
316
00:21:13,060 --> 00:21:15,540
They're gonna...
317
00:21:15,540 --> 00:21:18,780
They don't get out enough!
318
00:21:18,780 --> 00:21:21,420
I got it!
319
00:21:21,420 --> 00:21:25,420
I got it!
320
00:21:44,100 --> 00:21:47,100
Look, I've told you before, he's not
leaving college. That's it! >
321
00:21:47,100 --> 00:21:49,940
You don't need to be such
a monster man about it! >
322
00:21:49,940 --> 00:21:51,180
Who's being a monster man? >
323
00:21:51,180 --> 00:21:52,340
You is. Bollocks! >
324
00:21:52,340 --> 00:21:54,820
What's eating you,
you big old bully!? >
325
00:21:54,820 --> 00:21:57,740
Nothing! Nothing.
Just leave it alone. >
326
00:21:57,740 --> 00:21:59,700
He's not leaving, that's final. >
327
00:21:59,700 --> 00:22:03,700
DOORBELL RINGS
328
00:22:07,740 --> 00:22:10,380
All right, Walter.
329
00:22:10,380 --> 00:22:12,820
Bandy... How you doin'?
330
00:22:12,820 --> 00:22:15,460
Only passable, Walter.
331
00:22:15,460 --> 00:22:19,460
It seems like my Dale
has overstepped his mouth.
332
00:22:21,540 --> 00:22:24,460
Little misunderstanding, that's it.
333
00:22:24,460 --> 00:22:28,100
What have you gotta say, dildohead?
334
00:22:28,100 --> 00:22:30,700
Sorry, Mr Oliver.
335
00:22:30,700 --> 00:22:33,060
And...?
336
00:22:33,060 --> 00:22:34,540
Sorry, Max.
337
00:22:34,540 --> 00:22:38,540
He's baked a cake of remorse.
338
00:22:47,220 --> 00:22:49,980
Very nice.
339
00:22:49,980 --> 00:22:51,500
So we're all right then, Walter?
340
00:22:51,500 --> 00:22:54,500
Water under the bridge, Bandy.
How's the wife?
341
00:22:54,500 --> 00:22:56,420
Oh, not bad.
They gave her early release.
342
00:22:56,420 --> 00:22:59,180
Still gotta wear
the electronic tag, of course.
343
00:22:59,180 --> 00:23:00,740
Bummer.
344
00:23:00,740 --> 00:23:03,940
(MOUTHS SILENTLY)
345
00:23:03,940 --> 00:23:07,660
from operating a concrete mixer
or a cattle prod.
346
00:23:07,660 --> 00:23:11,660
It's probably for the best.
347
00:23:26,780 --> 00:23:29,420
# Gotta get bad before it gets good
348
00:23:29,420 --> 00:23:32,100
# It's gotta get bad
before it gets good
349
00:23:32,100 --> 00:23:36,100
# It's gotta get bad
before it gets good
350
00:23:36,180 --> 00:23:37,220
# I want it good now
351
00:23:37,220 --> 00:23:39,900
# But it's gotta get bad
before it gets good
352
00:23:39,900 --> 00:23:41,340
# That's what you say
353
00:23:41,340 --> 00:23:45,340
# It's gotta get bad
before it gets good
354
00:23:45,380 --> 00:23:48,100
# Stay with me
You know that you should
355
00:23:48,100 --> 00:23:52,100
# Cos it's gotta get bad
before it gets good
356
00:23:52,700 --> 00:23:55,220
# You say you crushed me
357
00:23:55,220 --> 00:23:57,940
# But just me
358
00:23:57,940 --> 00:24:01,940
# Put your faith in me
then wait patiently
359
00:24:03,900 --> 00:24:07,900
# You say it's hard now
but good things come from this
360
00:24:10,020 --> 00:24:14,020
# So I'll keep on living
on your promises
361
00:24:15,340 --> 00:24:18,380
# Gotta get bad before it gets good
362
00:24:18,380 --> 00:24:21,060
# It's gotta get bad
before it gets good
363
00:24:21,060 --> 00:24:25,060
# It's gotta get bad
before it gets good
364
00:24:25,060 --> 00:24:28,100
# You tell me lies
365
00:24:28,100 --> 00:24:31,100
# But you do it with style
366
00:24:31,100 --> 00:24:33,420
# Saying it'll come good
367
00:24:33,420 --> 00:24:35,580
# In a little while
368
00:24:35,580 --> 00:24:39,300
# You keep on spinning your words
369
00:24:39,300 --> 00:24:42,060
# That beguile
370
00:24:42,060 --> 00:24:46,060
# Then you break your promises
with a film star smile
371
00:24:46,980 --> 00:24:49,060
# Don't care what you say
372
00:24:49,060 --> 00:24:52,860
# Just show me what you did
373
00:24:52,860 --> 00:24:56,860
# Show me what you did. #
374
00:25:08,940 --> 00:25:12,940
Oh, Tony! For fuck's sake. Come on!
375
00:25:18,700 --> 00:25:20,020
Fucking hell.
376
00:25:20,020 --> 00:25:24,020
Get off!
377
00:25:25,620 --> 00:25:29,620
Oh, fuck.
378
00:25:40,740 --> 00:25:44,740
CAMERA SHUTTER SNAPS
379
00:26:01,060 --> 00:26:05,060
PHONE RINGS
380
00:26:09,380 --> 00:26:11,060
'Tony?
381
00:26:11,060 --> 00:26:13,300
'Are you all right?'
382
00:26:13,300 --> 00:26:15,500
No.
383
00:26:15,500 --> 00:26:18,020
Nobody wants me
to come out any more.
384
00:26:18,020 --> 00:26:21,220
'Oh, fuck it. Come anyway.'
385
00:26:21,220 --> 00:26:23,860
'My dad won't let me
go back to college.'
386
00:26:23,860 --> 00:26:26,380
And mine won't let me leave.
387
00:26:26,380 --> 00:26:29,700
We're both bummed, bruv.
388
00:26:29,700 --> 00:26:32,820
'Why doesn't Sid come any more?'
389
00:26:32,820 --> 00:26:34,340
Can't remember when he was here.
390
00:26:34,340 --> 00:26:37,940
'He misses you, Tony.'
391
00:26:37,940 --> 00:26:41,580
I miss me.
392
00:26:41,580 --> 00:26:44,300
Come out. I'll get you dancing.
393
00:26:44,300 --> 00:26:45,340
'Yeah?'
394
00:26:45,340 --> 00:26:47,620
You gonna gay me?
395
00:26:47,620 --> 00:26:51,620
'Hey...Tony's here.'
396
00:26:56,380 --> 00:26:58,700
SQUEAKING
397
00:26:58,700 --> 00:27:02,700
Who's that?
398
00:27:07,180 --> 00:27:09,300
Hello, everybody.
399
00:27:09,300 --> 00:27:13,300
I'd like to sing a little ditty
that I hope you'll rather enjoy.
400
00:27:14,940 --> 00:27:17,220
Alastair, would you mind
pressing play, please?
401
00:27:17,220 --> 00:27:19,500
Thanks awfully.
402
00:27:19,500 --> 00:27:23,500
Raaaas! Gimme a riddim blood. Mi
gonna tear it up with a back ender.
403
00:27:24,780 --> 00:27:28,780
I wanna hear it big, blud.
I wanna hear it hit out, blud!
404
00:27:29,180 --> 00:27:33,180
I wanna hear it massive!
Cos we're takin' it uptown!
405
00:27:39,860 --> 00:27:43,860
(FAST RAPPING)
406
00:28:28,140 --> 00:28:29,420
Hey! Maxxie!
407
00:28:29,420 --> 00:28:33,420
Monkey Man!
408
00:28:35,580 --> 00:28:39,580
CHEERS AND WHISTLES
409
00:29:17,460 --> 00:29:21,460
You're just a kid.
410
00:29:21,860 --> 00:29:22,500
You're mental.
411
00:29:22,500 --> 00:29:26,020
You're mental.
Thanks.
412
00:29:26,020 --> 00:29:30,020
Ready?
413
00:29:43,820 --> 00:29:47,820
Hey, Jal! Where's your moves?
414
00:30:03,980 --> 00:30:06,860
Fuck me senseless.
415
00:30:10,980 --> 00:30:14,980
Yeah. He's hot, man.
416
00:30:15,740 --> 00:30:19,740
Ah, you gay boy!
417
00:31:09,460 --> 00:31:13,460
BAGPIPE PLAYS
418
00:31:14,900 --> 00:31:18,900
BAGPIPES PLAY LOUDER
419
00:31:20,180 --> 00:31:24,180
Here I come, Cas. I'm coming!
420
00:31:51,500 --> 00:31:53,180
It's OK, Tony.
421
00:31:53,180 --> 00:31:57,180
Come on.
422
00:31:58,980 --> 00:32:01,100
No way. Look who's coming.
423
00:32:01,100 --> 00:32:04,460
It's Tony Stonem. >
424
00:32:04,460 --> 00:32:06,060
Oh, my God!
425
00:32:06,060 --> 00:32:10,060
Tony, hi! You look so OK.
426
00:32:10,340 --> 00:32:12,860
Not like... Well, they said
you were like a total mong,
427
00:32:12,860 --> 00:32:15,780
and I would have been so pissed
if you were a vegetable
428
00:32:15,780 --> 00:32:17,820
and had to be switched off, yah?
429
00:32:17,820 --> 00:32:18,860
Do I know you?
430
00:32:18,860 --> 00:32:22,860
Tony! You do...
You know me really rather well.
431
00:32:23,380 --> 00:32:25,460
Remember?
432
00:32:25,460 --> 00:32:28,980
You were a very naughty boy.
433
00:32:28,980 --> 00:32:31,900
But I forgive you...
434
00:32:31,900 --> 00:32:34,980
Is it all still working, yah?
435
00:32:34,980 --> 00:32:36,420
Sorry. Can't place you.
436
00:32:36,420 --> 00:32:39,940
You remember, Tony. How you said
I was like your total dream shag?
437
00:32:39,940 --> 00:32:40,940
I said that?
438
00:32:40,940 --> 00:32:43,900
I said that?
Because Michelle had the funny tits,
and was so boring,
439
00:32:43,900 --> 00:32:47,500
and you wanted to go out with me cos
I had the longest tongue you ever...
440
00:32:47,500 --> 00:32:50,140
He can't...place you.
441
00:32:50,140 --> 00:32:51,940
Oh...
442
00:32:51,940 --> 00:32:55,940
Come on, Tone.
443
00:32:59,780 --> 00:33:02,900
Tongue?
444
00:33:02,900 --> 00:33:06,900
Oh, yeah.
445
00:33:39,100 --> 00:33:42,900
Ah! Get off!
446
00:33:42,900 --> 00:33:46,420
Ahh!
447
00:33:46,420 --> 00:33:50,420
Help!
448
00:33:50,500 --> 00:33:52,420
Wanna get out!
449
00:33:52,420 --> 00:33:56,420
Tony!
450
00:34:02,780 --> 00:34:06,780
Tony!
451
00:34:07,100 --> 00:34:11,100
Tony!
452
00:34:12,140 --> 00:34:16,140
Get the fuck out my way, will you!
453
00:34:21,660 --> 00:34:25,660
Tony!
454
00:34:25,740 --> 00:34:29,740
Tone?
455
00:34:38,180 --> 00:34:42,180
Tone?
456
00:34:47,420 --> 00:34:49,340
Tone?
457
00:34:49,340 --> 00:34:53,340
Stop fucking about, yeah?
458
00:34:53,940 --> 00:34:57,940
(WHISPERS): Wait... Wait.
459
00:35:01,660 --> 00:35:04,620
All right, Blowjob.
460
00:35:04,620 --> 00:35:07,020
Faggot.
461
00:35:07,020 --> 00:35:08,020
Cocksucker!
462
00:35:08,020 --> 00:35:08,740
Wanker!
463
00:35:08,740 --> 00:35:10,020
Wanker!
All right, gay boy?
464
00:35:10,020 --> 00:35:14,020
Fucking get him! Get him!
465
00:35:30,980 --> 00:35:34,980
(WOMAN LAUGHS)
466
00:35:48,740 --> 00:35:52,740
Tossers.
467
00:36:11,420 --> 00:36:14,940
Sent them the other way.
468
00:36:14,940 --> 00:36:16,540
The fucking cake.
469
00:36:16,540 --> 00:36:20,220
I should've knew it when I saw
the hundreds and thousands.
470
00:36:20,220 --> 00:36:24,220
Lemon Drizzle. It's a piece of piss.
471
00:36:25,540 --> 00:36:27,140
Dale.
472
00:36:27,140 --> 00:36:31,140
You can't just
treat me like shit and then just...
473
00:36:31,980 --> 00:36:35,980
Just...
474
00:36:36,260 --> 00:36:40,260
Ah...fuck it!
475
00:36:48,620 --> 00:36:52,620
DOORBELL RINGS
476
00:36:59,420 --> 00:37:02,980
He doesn't answer his phone.
477
00:37:02,980 --> 00:37:06,980
I don't even know if he can.
478
00:37:09,820 --> 00:37:13,820
I can't keep him in. But...
479
00:37:13,820 --> 00:37:16,700
He's not right.
480
00:37:16,700 --> 00:37:18,900
Who is?
481
00:37:21,180 --> 00:37:23,220
This competition last week.
482
00:37:23,220 --> 00:37:25,900
Fucking break-dancing chihuahua.
483
00:37:25,900 --> 00:37:29,900
I mean, what's it come to?
484
00:37:30,980 --> 00:37:34,980
Right.
485
00:37:36,380 --> 00:37:40,380
You never know what's gonna happen
till you're sitting in a hospital.
486
00:37:43,020 --> 00:37:46,940
And I'm thinking, I've really,
really fucked up here,
487
00:37:46,940 --> 00:37:50,940
because I'm supposed
to stop this happening.
488
00:37:51,820 --> 00:37:55,820
And now I don't know where he is.
489
00:37:58,180 --> 00:38:02,180
Something happens,
suddenly you've lost them.
490
00:38:09,940 --> 00:38:13,940
His friends'll look after him.
491
00:38:27,700 --> 00:38:31,700
LAUGHTER AND CONVERSATION
492
00:39:14,540 --> 00:39:17,140
What you on?
493
00:39:17,140 --> 00:39:21,020
Cass sent me a tab.
494
00:39:21,020 --> 00:39:25,020
She misses you, right?
495
00:39:28,380 --> 00:39:31,980
I don't know what
I'm supposed to do.
496
00:39:31,980 --> 00:39:35,980
I go to see him.
497
00:39:36,260 --> 00:39:39,460
I went to see him.
498
00:39:39,460 --> 00:39:42,980
Well, I suppose
you deserve some fun.
499
00:39:42,980 --> 00:39:45,180
Those guys just like my tits.
500
00:39:45,180 --> 00:39:49,180
Oh. Sweet.
501
00:39:52,420 --> 00:39:55,380
You're avoiding me.
502
00:39:55,380 --> 00:39:57,020
You make me think about him.
503
00:39:57,020 --> 00:39:59,700
You're not the only one, Chelle.
504
00:39:59,700 --> 00:40:03,140
I was there every day trying
to get him to say something.
505
00:40:03,140 --> 00:40:07,140
And everybody really, really
fucked up and I'm just trying to...
506
00:40:07,540 --> 00:40:09,900
to...
507
00:40:09,900 --> 00:40:13,900
And nobody comes but me
cos it's so terrible.
508
00:40:14,260 --> 00:40:16,660
You should have fucking helped me.
509
00:40:16,660 --> 00:40:19,780
All right!
510
00:40:19,780 --> 00:40:22,620
(SIGHS)
511
00:40:22,620 --> 00:40:25,900
When it happened...
512
00:40:25,900 --> 00:40:29,260
before the bus...
513
00:40:29,260 --> 00:40:33,260
..he was on the phone
and he said something.
514
00:40:34,220 --> 00:40:36,180
I don't think he remembers.
515
00:40:36,180 --> 00:40:36,780
But he said...
516
00:40:36,780 --> 00:40:38,580
Chelle.
517
00:40:38,580 --> 00:40:42,580
Fuck's sake, I'm trying
to tell you this!
518
00:40:44,660 --> 00:40:48,660
Oh, Jesus!
519
00:40:49,060 --> 00:40:53,060
Tony?
520
00:40:53,740 --> 00:40:57,740
Hello.
521
00:41:05,020 --> 00:41:08,260
Wait, I'll go back with you.
522
00:41:08,260 --> 00:41:12,260
Effy's taking me.
523
00:41:13,460 --> 00:41:17,460
I will remember everything.
524
00:41:36,380 --> 00:41:37,700
Where are you going?
525
00:41:37,700 --> 00:41:41,700
Not now, Sid! >
526
00:41:42,580 --> 00:41:46,580
# Clouds part
527
00:41:49,300 --> 00:41:53,300
# Just to
528
00:41:53,900 --> 00:41:57,900
# Give us a little sun
529
00:42:04,020 --> 00:42:08,020
# There's a limit to your love
530
00:42:10,300 --> 00:42:14,300
# Like a waterfall
In slow motion... #
531
00:42:16,900 --> 00:42:20,500
Got lost.
532
00:42:20,500 --> 00:42:23,180
Where do I fucking live?
533
00:42:23,180 --> 00:42:26,340
# There's a limit to your love
534
00:42:26,340 --> 00:42:28,740
# Your love, love, love... #
535
00:42:28,740 --> 00:42:29,780
(SOBS)
536
00:42:29,780 --> 00:42:32,860
Walter will run him round
in the morning.
537
00:42:32,860 --> 00:42:36,860
Look, don't worry yourselves, OK.
538
00:42:40,060 --> 00:42:42,500
She's a bit upset.
539
00:42:42,500 --> 00:42:45,660
Yeah.
540
00:42:45,660 --> 00:42:49,660
College starts today.
541
00:42:52,820 --> 00:42:56,060
He's in there, love.
542
00:42:56,060 --> 00:42:58,420
Talking, not shouting.
543
00:42:58,420 --> 00:43:02,420
OK.
544
00:43:16,420 --> 00:43:20,420
Lovely bit of cake, that.
545
00:43:20,540 --> 00:43:24,300
Young Dale's got the magic touch.
546
00:43:24,300 --> 00:43:28,300
He's got that all right.
547
00:43:29,900 --> 00:43:32,820
You're good enough.
548
00:43:32,820 --> 00:43:35,660
Yeah. I am.
549
00:43:35,660 --> 00:43:37,660
I'm bloody good.
550
00:43:37,660 --> 00:43:40,060
Get it from your old man, probably.
551
00:43:40,060 --> 00:43:42,580
Reckon?
552
00:43:42,580 --> 00:43:45,260
I'm artistic, yeah.
553
00:43:45,260 --> 00:43:49,260
Not as artistic as you, mind.
554
00:43:49,580 --> 00:43:53,340
Some things is just
the way they are.
555
00:43:53,340 --> 00:43:57,340
Yup.
556
00:43:58,580 --> 00:44:01,500
I got lucky, didn't I?
557
00:44:01,500 --> 00:44:05,380
You didn't turn out like
the fucking ASBO Army out there.
558
00:44:05,380 --> 00:44:06,820
No, Dad.
559
00:44:06,820 --> 00:44:10,820
I feel like taking some
fucking credit for it. OK?
560
00:44:12,180 --> 00:44:16,060
I'm never gonna be a builder, Dad.
561
00:44:16,060 --> 00:44:19,820
You'll understand this one day, kid.
562
00:44:19,820 --> 00:44:23,820
You're everything
I've got to show for my life.
563
00:44:25,500 --> 00:44:28,460
And I'm not ready for you to go,
564
00:44:28,460 --> 00:44:32,460
because I fucking love you too much.
565
00:44:32,940 --> 00:44:34,740
I'm an idiot, I know.
566
00:44:34,740 --> 00:44:38,740
I love you too, Dad.
567
00:44:39,940 --> 00:44:43,940
So if you're not coming building,
back to college.
568
00:44:45,620 --> 00:44:47,700
Give me the last year.
569
00:44:47,700 --> 00:44:51,700
And then it's game on. All right?
570
00:44:51,780 --> 00:44:55,780
All right.
571
00:44:57,980 --> 00:45:01,980
Taz. On your bed.
572
00:45:04,140 --> 00:45:08,140
At least the sodding dog
does what he's told.
573
00:45:22,100 --> 00:45:26,100
I can register if I write my name.
574
00:45:26,220 --> 00:45:28,020
It's more than that, Tony.
575
00:45:28,020 --> 00:45:30,700
It's not just signing your name.
576
00:45:30,700 --> 00:45:31,860
Then fucking help me!
577
00:45:31,860 --> 00:45:34,460
Or are you going to be
a complete fucking arse-wit
578
00:45:34,460 --> 00:45:36,260
like everyone fucking else I know?
579
00:45:36,260 --> 00:45:38,740
like everyone fucking else I know?
Whoa! He speaks.
580
00:45:38,740 --> 00:45:41,620
You gotta slow it down.
581
00:45:41,620 --> 00:45:43,900
Stop trying to write.
582
00:45:43,900 --> 00:45:47,900
It's just a shape your hand makes.
583
00:45:53,140 --> 00:45:56,380
Close your eyes and just kinda...
584
00:45:56,380 --> 00:46:00,380
dance it.
585
00:46:15,980 --> 00:46:19,980
Tone.
586
00:46:28,900 --> 00:46:32,860
Do I have to gay you now?
587
00:46:32,860 --> 00:46:34,420
# ASOBI SEKSU:
Thursday
588
00:46:34,420 --> 00:46:38,020
# On gentle ground
589
00:46:38,020 --> 00:46:41,140
# I'm waiting for you
590
00:46:41,140 --> 00:46:44,260
# In drops of dew
591
00:46:44,260 --> 00:46:48,260
# I wished that I were you
592
00:46:48,460 --> 00:46:50,500
# It seems you lost your way
593
00:46:50,500 --> 00:46:53,700
# You've let it all fall apart
594
00:46:53,700 --> 00:46:56,540
# Nothing's left here but you
595
00:46:56,540 --> 00:47:00,540
# And you remind me
596
00:47:00,740 --> 00:47:03,460
# Now that we've lost our way
597
00:47:03,460 --> 00:47:07,380
# The rest can all fall apart
598
00:47:07,380 --> 00:47:09,780
# All I see here is you
599
00:47:09,780 --> 00:47:13,780
# All it does is remind me
600
00:47:19,860 --> 00:47:23,860
CAMERA SHUTTER
601
00:47:28,100 --> 00:47:30,100
Who are you?
602
00:47:30,100 --> 00:47:33,100
Shit!
603
00:47:33,100 --> 00:47:37,100
Hang on...
604
00:47:37,540 --> 00:47:41,540
You're fucking crazy!
605
00:48:04,100 --> 00:48:08,100
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