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[music playing]
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Hey, Macarena!
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[yowl]
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[music playing]
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What in the universe is this?
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Gus's chain found a workout tape.
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I can't imagine what would compel you to improve your
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physical well-being.
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Your high school reunion? Are you serious?
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Hey, I have an image to uphold. You don't age so you
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don't get it.
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Once upon a time, I was the coolest of the cool.
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Hey!
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[yowl]
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Yeah!
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I'll never watch this ass again!
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Then let me tell you, old and fat ain't cool.
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You know that grilled cheese sandwich I lost last
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week?
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It was under my breast the entire time.
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I rest my case.
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I got what you want, Uncle Chodey.
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Good! Get over here. These love handles gotta go.
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What is that?
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An in-home liposuction machine. Why go to a plastic
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surgeon when I can get the same thing at home for a
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fraction of the cost?
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[engine revs]
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Nate, did you get your invite or do you actually have
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to graduate to go to the reunion?
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I graduated and I'm like Java over here. I haven't
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gained an ounce.
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[spits]
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Let's hope his species has more than one.
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Wasn't Darf Bobo in your class?
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Yeah, he went to the same school, but he wasn't in my
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class.
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I mean, look, I was an insecure four-eyed zit farm.
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He fell for every practical joke in the book. Good
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You think he'll have the quavos to show up?
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God, I hope so. We'll eat some while the laugh at.
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Was high school really that good, Uncle Chodey?
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Whip my boy. They were the best seven years of my
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life.
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Those were the worst four years of my life. That is,
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until I married you, of course.
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I'd have put you out of your misery years ago if I
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could find a gun that didn't read bang.
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Bang when I fire it.
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High school.
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Get from the fire drill.
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There's one for the Yibba.
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Chodey.
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Chodey.
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Chodey, don't make me angry. You wouldn't like me
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when I'm angry.
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I've been waiting for this day. My success is known
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throughout the universe.
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And now I'm going to rub Chodey's nose in it. All
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their nose is in it.
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They're all going to laugh at you.
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Not anymore.
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Sorry, Chode. There's a new cool kid in town.
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I'm ready. Let's go.
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Are you kidding? You're not going to wear that, are
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you? I have a reputation to uphold.
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It is a little revealing.
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If not revealing enough, I want to see more Victoria,
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less secret.
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So who are you looking forward to this?
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Well, I don't know.
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See, there was this group of mean girls who gave the
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other girls swirly's,
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shook them down for lunch money, stole their boyfriends.
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Oh, how terribly awful for you.
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No, I was the mean girls' leader.
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We swore we'd never lose touch, but when they went to
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prison, if they don't show up,
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this whole evening will be a bust.
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Well, except for the buffet.
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How'd you end up going to school with Chodey anyway?
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Alien exchange student.
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What did they exchange you for? An extra large?
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[Laughs]
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Bitch.
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So, now that the fat's away, it's time for us to play.
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Any ideas?
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I've been dying for a good game of bridge.
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How about we play a man's game?
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A cribbage?
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Poker!
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[Music]
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Hey, guys, looking good. Not you, me.
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Okay, hang on. Wait, wait, don't tell me.
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Veronica, is that you?
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Oh, it is you.
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And this must be...
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Chodey, it's me. Robert?
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Robert, my PE locker with "next to yours."
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[Grunts]
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[Cheering]
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Tilt, I'll get the note.
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I thought you two were doing life without parole.
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We were.
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We broke out. We couldn't miss this.
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You girls are the best.
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I can't believe Tanook and her friends have the nerve
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to show up after what they did to me.
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When I was a sophomore, they pulled a trampoline out
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from under me and I landed on my head.
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They pushed me in front of a bus.
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They pushed me in front of a bus and then Tilt, Toc,
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my boyfriend.
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Tanook was the worst. I asked to borrow her pencil
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once and she threw it at me.
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How easy is that how you lost your ear to I?
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I was born this way, but the pencil stuck in my arm
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and left this blue mark that never went away.
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Bitch.
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So, you know, I took the liberty of inviting a fourth.
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Oh, I don't know. I thought this was going to be a
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friendly get-together.
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That's exactly how I sold it to him. See, I thought
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we could run a little confidence game on him.
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That's dishonest.
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It sounds like trouble to me.
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Oh, and I hear he's rich.
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We're in.
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Oh my God. That's Bobo. He's really changed.
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I hear he's the head of his own evil empire.
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Hey, heart to then, weren't you voted most likely the
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head of an evil empire?
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Oh, shut up. I'm glad you can all finally recognize.
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Great.
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Now, for when you...
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[laughing]
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Send in the clown. Wait, he's already here.
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Chill.
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[music playing]
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[laughing]
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I still got it. That Bobo.
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What a moron. We'll be laughing about that for the
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next 20.
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Jeez, look at those bloodshot eyes. What the hell are
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you been smoking?
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[groaning]
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What the hell am I been smoking?
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So chode, who's the cool one now?
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Still me.
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And now?
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And Cormoran.
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Oh, who am I kidding? I'm not cool. I'm pathetic.
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Good. You figured that out a lot faster than I
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thought you would.
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Wait, wait, wait, wait. If all you want to be is cool,
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crap, I can teach you that.
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You can teach me?
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Trust me, Bobo. When I get done with you, you'll be
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cooler than liquid nitrogen.
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[music playing]
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[music playing]
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[coughing]
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[music playing]
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[music playing]
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[music playing]
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Get him, hell.
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Okay, he'll be here soon, so this is the plan.
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We play Texas hold him, feel him out for a while, let
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him win, get comfortable.
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Then when the pots get bigger, we cheat like hell and
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take him to the cleaners.
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What's his name again?
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Jim, Captain Jim.
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[music playing]
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I feel like Vinderella at the ball.
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Well, go on, give it a test drive.
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[music playing]
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[music playing]
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[music playing]
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[music playing]
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[music playing]
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[music playing]
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[music playing]
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[music playing]
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[music playing]
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[music playing]
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[music playing]
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[music playing]
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Hey, can I get a light?
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Well, Bobo, you've changed, man. How'd you do it?
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That would be me, Professor Chickens, at your service.
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The mace in space, please, meet me in your face.
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That was too funny. I'm laughing so hard. I'm crying.
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[music playing]
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Very funny, but the joke is on you. I cannot feel a
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thing.
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It's time for some payback.
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So, what do we do?
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Yeah, I've got an idea how to get Tink and Oka to Newt.
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Anyone got his cell phone?
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I just don't know what to do.
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Well, if I were you, I'd trust my instincts.
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Me, come on, you've won the last eight hands.
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I didn't know you could beat a full house with an
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almost straight queen high.
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Is that even a real--
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Ow!
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Hey, what do you say we up the stakes here?
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Give us a chance to get our money back.
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You leave me no choice, but to continue to take
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advantage of your poor play.
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Great! Deal 'em, Whip, and this time, give me the
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good stuff.
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Hey, why don't you cut a rug with old sex here?
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Okay!
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I don't think so. I don't really know how to dance.
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No, sure you don't. It's just like sex, only more
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vertical.
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Wait, wait, wait a minute. We have sex standing up
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all the time.
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Let's see.
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Oh, it's just like sex with only with your clothes on.
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No, no, no, we do that too.
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I guess it is just like sex.
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Huh?
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Oh, good, yeah, like that.
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This evening of getting better and better,
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your phone line on your feet.
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Well, my feet.
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[music]
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Hey, hey guys, you remember the time I taped that
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centerfold on the scroll map of the universe?
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Old Mr. Bookser pulled it down.
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The whole class got to look at more than Uranus, if
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you know what I mean.
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Didn't he get fired for that?
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Dude, that was classic.
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Not half as classic as the prank I've got planned for
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Bobo.
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Hey, when I give T'Nook the signal, she's gonna...
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[music]
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[applause]
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You've done your charity. You can go back to Joe now.
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Actually, I'm having a wonderful time.
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I think we should vote for you.
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Oh, I don't know. I've never won anything.
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Except if Merkin wants an FA contest on the stupidest
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thing ever done with an electric razor.
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This is too rich for my cold blood. I got nothing.
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Yeah, what he said.
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I see it will once again be man versus...
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machine. I feel at most uncompelled to go all in.
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Big deal. How about growing a sack and put some real
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money in the line?
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If the stakes are to be raised, I must have my crew
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transport more money.
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It's Jim. Pick up.
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I need you to do something for me.
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First, I need 50,000 cronics bean to this location.
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Once the money is safely aboard, wait 15 seconds and
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fire a...
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[sneezes]
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I'm John Walsh, the 12th. Tonight, thanks to a hot
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tip,
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we follow local police as they pursue two dangerous
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fugitives.
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The morons probably don't even know they're about to
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be captured on universal television.
269
00:14:25,000 --> 00:14:26,000
[laughs]
270
00:14:26,000 --> 00:14:27,000
Huh?
271
00:14:27,000 --> 00:14:32,000
[screams]
272
00:14:32,000 --> 00:14:35,000
It was great catching up with you two.
273
00:14:35,000 --> 00:14:38,000
It was just like old times.
274
00:14:38,000 --> 00:14:44,000
Yeah! Well, that's two down, one to go.
275
00:14:44,000 --> 00:14:45,000
[sighs]
276
00:14:45,000 --> 00:14:47,000
[speaking gibberish]
277
00:14:47,000 --> 00:14:49,000
Fat cow, it should eat anything.
278
00:14:49,000 --> 00:14:53,000
That's it. I've got the perfect way to make Tanook
279
00:14:53,000 --> 00:14:55,000
regret everything she's ever done to us.
280
00:14:55,000 --> 00:14:57,000
[burps]
281
00:14:57,000 --> 00:14:59,000
[burps]
282
00:14:59,000 --> 00:15:09,000
Ah, just as I asked. 50,000 cronics.
283
00:15:09,000 --> 00:15:11,000
But that's more than I've got.
284
00:15:11,000 --> 00:15:13,000
There must be something called this flying death trap
285
00:15:13,000 --> 00:15:16,000
that would equal if not surpass its value.
286
00:15:16,000 --> 00:15:18,000
[screams]
287
00:15:18,000 --> 00:15:20,000
[screams]
288
00:15:20,000 --> 00:15:23,000
Relax. I assure you, it was merely an accident.
289
00:15:23,000 --> 00:15:25,000
Are you prepared to make your wager?
290
00:15:25,000 --> 00:15:28,140
Let's not worry about the details. I'll find a way to
291
00:15:28,140 --> 00:15:29,000
cover it.
292
00:15:29,000 --> 00:15:31,000
[laughs]
293
00:15:31,000 --> 00:15:34,590
All right, everybody. The moment you've been waiting
294
00:15:34,590 --> 00:15:35,000
for.
295
00:15:35,000 --> 00:15:40,000
The crowning of the king and queen of the reunion.
296
00:15:40,000 --> 00:15:42,000
I think it's gonna be you, pal.
297
00:15:42,000 --> 00:15:44,000
Why are you building up his hopes?
298
00:15:44,000 --> 00:15:46,990
Because, I believe in him. Finally his day to shine.
299
00:15:46,990 --> 00:15:50,000
And, uh, I kinda stuffed the ballot box.
300
00:15:52,000 --> 00:15:59,000
And the reunion queen is, as expected, Queen Amidala.
301
00:15:59,000 --> 00:16:05,400
She's not the queen. I am. Don't mind her. That's
302
00:16:05,400 --> 00:16:07,000
just my servant, Padme.
303
00:16:07,000 --> 00:16:11,000
I am the real queen. The hell you are!
304
00:16:11,000 --> 00:16:13,000
[screams]
305
00:16:13,000 --> 00:16:19,370
Okay, while they sort that out, let's move on to the
306
00:16:19,370 --> 00:16:20,000
king.
307
00:16:21,000 --> 00:16:24,000
It's Darf Bulb.
308
00:16:24,000 --> 00:16:26,000
[screams]
309
00:16:26,000 --> 00:16:28,000
[laughs]
310
00:16:28,000 --> 00:16:30,000
[screams]
311
00:16:30,000 --> 00:16:48,000
[gasps]
312
00:16:48,000 --> 00:16:50,000
[music]
313
00:16:50,000 --> 00:17:12,000
[laughs]
314
00:17:15,000 --> 00:17:18,000
Trust me, pal. Trust me, pal.
315
00:17:18,000 --> 00:17:29,000
[screams]
316
00:17:29,000 --> 00:17:41,000
Wow. How the hell are you doing that?
317
00:17:43,000 --> 00:17:45,000
[screams]
318
00:17:45,000 --> 00:17:49,000
What are you talking about?
319
00:17:49,000 --> 00:17:50,000
That was a three-pointer!
320
00:17:50,000 --> 00:17:53,000
No chance. Your foot was on the line.
321
00:17:53,000 --> 00:17:56,000
It's not my fault I have cloud feet.
322
00:17:56,000 --> 00:17:58,000
[screams]
323
00:17:58,000 --> 00:18:11,000
Thanks.
324
00:18:11,000 --> 00:18:14,000
Bobo, stop! You're behind all this.
325
00:18:14,000 --> 00:18:16,920
Whoa, what are you talking about? This whole thing's
326
00:18:16,920 --> 00:18:18,000
just a big mistake.
327
00:18:18,000 --> 00:18:20,000
How the hell am I faked?
328
00:18:20,000 --> 00:18:22,400
No, no, no, no. That didn't make a mistake. It's a
329
00:18:22,400 --> 00:18:24,000
misunderstanding.
330
00:18:24,000 --> 00:18:27,000
Yeah, the pig's blood is an initiation.
331
00:18:27,000 --> 00:18:28,000
Really?
332
00:18:28,000 --> 00:18:30,000
We all went through it, right, guys?
333
00:18:30,000 --> 00:18:31,000
Right!
334
00:18:31,000 --> 00:18:32,000
Of course!
335
00:18:32,000 --> 00:18:35,000
No one ever dumped blood on me.
336
00:18:35,000 --> 00:18:36,000
Ow!
337
00:18:36,000 --> 00:18:39,140
I know, I know. The dorky pig's blood thing is a
338
00:18:39,140 --> 00:18:41,000
little 1976 Earth,
339
00:18:41,000 --> 00:18:43,000
but, you know, it's kind of a tradition.
340
00:18:43,000 --> 00:18:46,000
Now, those flaming pies, they rocked.
341
00:18:46,000 --> 00:18:49,000
Yeah, but, uh, that was pretty cool of me.
342
00:18:49,000 --> 00:18:51,000
Hell yeah!
343
00:18:51,000 --> 00:18:54,000
You guys don't know how much this means to me.
344
00:18:54,000 --> 00:18:57,000
I love you. I love you all.
345
00:18:57,000 --> 00:19:00,000
Okay, heading for uncool at rift speed.
346
00:19:00,000 --> 00:19:02,000
Uh, right. Sorry.
347
00:19:02,000 --> 00:19:03,000
[laughs]
348
00:19:03,000 --> 00:19:06,000
Hey, everybody! Drinks are on me!
349
00:19:06,000 --> 00:19:09,000
[cheering]
350
00:19:09,000 --> 00:19:11,000
Yeah, that's cool.
351
00:19:11,000 --> 00:19:13,990
Bobo, tell us how you suddenly gained the power of
352
00:19:13,990 --> 00:19:15,000
telekinesis.
353
00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:19,270
I don't know. See, it's usually something clowns only
354
00:19:19,270 --> 00:19:21,000
go through during puberty.
355
00:19:21,000 --> 00:19:25,300
It all exists. Your penis unfurling like a party
356
00:19:25,300 --> 00:19:26,000
favor.
357
00:19:26,000 --> 00:19:28,000
So, it's temporary?
358
00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:30,420
Yeah, once I walk out of here, I'll be returning to
359
00:19:30,420 --> 00:19:31,000
normal.
360
00:19:31,000 --> 00:19:32,000
Good to know.
361
00:19:32,000 --> 00:19:35,000
Speaking of walking out of here, I gotta get going.
362
00:19:35,000 --> 00:19:38,000
This has been the best night of my life.
363
00:19:38,000 --> 00:19:41,000
I'll always cherish our dance.
364
00:19:41,000 --> 00:19:44,000
And, Chode, you made it all happen.
365
00:19:44,000 --> 00:19:46,000
Oh, never forget this.
366
00:19:46,000 --> 00:19:49,000
It was nothing. That's what friends are for, right?
367
00:19:49,000 --> 00:19:52,000
Thank you. Thank you all.
368
00:19:52,000 --> 00:19:56,000
Remember, what's cool, always cool.
369
00:19:56,000 --> 00:19:58,660
In the hell, you owe me one after saving your life
370
00:19:58,660 --> 00:19:59,000
and all.
371
00:19:59,000 --> 00:20:01,000
Under the bleachers?
372
00:20:01,000 --> 00:20:02,000
Red lima.
373
00:20:02,000 --> 00:20:05,000
It wasn't hard. It's written at a third grade level.
374
00:20:05,000 --> 00:20:07,000
[sighs]
375
00:20:07,000 --> 00:20:17,000
[music]
376
00:20:17,000 --> 00:20:20,000
I love the gratribution.
377
00:20:20,000 --> 00:20:23,000
The heifer never could resist a snack.
378
00:20:23,000 --> 00:20:25,000
I don't feel so good.
379
00:20:25,000 --> 00:20:27,000
Here it comes.
380
00:20:27,000 --> 00:20:30,000
Ah! Oh, my God!
381
00:20:30,000 --> 00:20:35,000
Oh, no! What have we done?
382
00:20:35,000 --> 00:20:40,000
[music]
383
00:20:40,000 --> 00:20:43,000
Ah, that bobo. Let us sucker.
384
00:20:43,000 --> 00:20:46,000
[music]
385
00:20:46,000 --> 00:20:47,000
What the hell happened?
386
00:20:47,000 --> 00:20:49,000
Just a friendly game of poker.
387
00:20:49,000 --> 00:20:51,000
It's not just bobo.
388
00:20:51,000 --> 00:20:54,000
You men turn everything into a childish competition.
389
00:20:54,000 --> 00:20:56,000
A challenge. A chance to one up each other.
390
00:20:56,000 --> 00:20:58,360
Don't you realize that sooner or later, it comes
391
00:20:58,360 --> 00:20:59,000
around to bite you and--
392
00:20:59,000 --> 00:21:01,000
Oh, no! Here we go again!
393
00:21:01,000 --> 00:21:04,000
Get out of the way! I gotta get to the toilet!
394
00:21:04,000 --> 00:21:08,000
Uh, Chinook, he took the bathroom, too.
395
00:21:08,000 --> 00:21:10,000
[screams]
396
00:21:10,000 --> 00:21:16,818
[music]
27212
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