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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074 Advertise your product or brand here contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today 2 00:00:18,800 --> 00:00:21,075 'Sometimes, you get a good Thursday, 3 00:00:21,160 --> 00:00:24,789 'sometimes a bog-standard Thursday, sometimes a shit Thursday.' 4 00:00:24,880 --> 00:00:26,836 This Thursday was mental. 5 00:00:26,920 --> 00:00:30,833 Thursday night in Babylon used to be '70s night but they changed it. 6 00:00:30,920 --> 00:00:33,150 Thursday night is '90s night, 7 00:00:33,240 --> 00:00:36,471 which makes you feel ancient. Thanks very much. 8 00:00:36,560 --> 00:00:40,519 I spent all night chasing after some bloke who turns out to be mad. 9 00:00:40,600 --> 00:00:45,549 Like, really mad. He had every episode of Juliet Bravo on tape. 10 00:00:45,640 --> 00:00:48,313 (Dance music, chatter) 11 00:00:48,400 --> 00:00:51,836 'So, it's getting late, lights on. 12 00:00:51,920 --> 00:00:57,392 'I haven't copped off, Phil's not copped off and Stuart... ' 13 00:00:57,480 --> 00:00:59,869 Stuart's copped off. 14 00:00:59,960 --> 00:01:01,951 Oi, Vince! 15 00:01:04,280 --> 00:01:06,316 Wait there. Don't move. 16 00:01:10,720 --> 00:01:13,280 - Where are you going? - You've copped off. 17 00:01:13,360 --> 00:01:16,830 - I'm just getting his telephone number. - Did he swallow it? 18 00:01:16,920 --> 00:01:21,391 I'll be ten minutes. Wait by the Jeep. You've gotta get me home. Wait for me! 19 00:01:21,480 --> 00:01:25,473 So, he brings the car, gives you the keys so you can't drink, 20 00:01:25,560 --> 00:01:27,630 then he buggers off. Nice system. 21 00:01:27,720 --> 00:01:31,508 - I'll give him ten minutes. I don't mind. - He's still looking. 22 00:01:31,600 --> 00:01:33,989 - He is not. - He is so. 23 00:01:34,080 --> 00:01:37,117 (Vince) He's all muscles. I don't cop off with muscles. 24 00:01:37,200 --> 00:01:40,556 I mean, what happens? He takes his kit off - Marky Mark. 25 00:01:40,640 --> 00:01:42,756 I take mine off - Norman Wisdom. 26 00:01:42,840 --> 00:01:47,709 I had a bloke with muscles once. Great. Like being let loose on a bouncy castle. 27 00:01:47,800 --> 00:01:50,792 - He's still looking. - (Cockney accent) Shut it! 28 00:01:50,880 --> 00:01:52,836 - Shut it! - Pat'll go mad. 29 00:01:52,920 --> 00:01:54,638 - Shut it! - (Horn beeps) 30 00:01:54,720 --> 00:01:58,793 'Sometimes, you're halfway through a shag and you just get bored of him. 31 00:01:58,880 --> 00:02:02,031 'So you wank him off in a doorway and move straight on. 32 00:02:02,120 --> 00:02:05,271 'Cos you keep on looking. That's why you keep going out. 33 00:02:05,360 --> 00:02:09,672 'There's always a new bloke, a better bloke, just waiting round the corner. 34 00:02:09,760 --> 00:02:12,149 'And that was the night he came along. 35 00:02:12,240 --> 00:02:14,993 'The one-night stand that never went away.' 36 00:02:15,560 --> 00:02:17,790 (Music, chatter) 37 00:02:27,200 --> 00:02:31,478 Excuse me... I'm just looking. I mean, what's the best place to go? 38 00:02:31,560 --> 00:02:35,872 Depends on what you're after. If you want bastards, you go in there. 39 00:02:35,960 --> 00:02:38,554 And if you want wankers, go in there. 40 00:02:38,640 --> 00:02:42,713 And if you want selfish, little, mincing, piss tart dickheads, 41 00:02:42,800 --> 00:02:45,997 then pick a building, any building. It's full of them. 42 00:02:46,080 --> 00:02:49,914 (Woman) Bernie! Don't be so daft. Don't listen to her. 43 00:02:50,000 --> 00:02:52,594 It's just a T-shirt! 44 00:02:52,680 --> 00:02:56,958 She's off her head, she's been drinking! Bernie! 45 00:03:11,160 --> 00:03:13,310 (* Indigo: Haven't You Heard) 46 00:03:41,160 --> 00:03:46,917 * I've been looking for you * Haven't you heard 47 00:03:49,000 --> 00:03:51,798 * Oh, I've been looking... * 48 00:03:53,160 --> 00:03:56,118 The first time I copped off, I was in school. 49 00:03:56,200 --> 00:03:58,760 Mr Daniels, PE. 50 00:03:58,840 --> 00:04:03,436 We're chatting away, football, or something and he's getting his gear off. 51 00:04:03,520 --> 00:04:05,556 Big, hairy bloke. Nice. 52 00:04:05,640 --> 00:04:09,110 So I keep talking. We're in his office. 53 00:04:09,200 --> 00:04:12,715 He's got this cubicle, like his own private shower. 54 00:04:13,800 --> 00:04:17,554 Next thing, he's stark bollock naked. Fantastic. 55 00:04:17,640 --> 00:04:20,996 I'm still talking away like a twat and he gets in the shower, 56 00:04:21,080 --> 00:04:23,640 pulls the curtain, half pulls it. 57 00:04:23,720 --> 00:04:26,359 Now, I'm twelve years old, 58 00:04:26,440 --> 00:04:28,795 I'm thinking "aye aye". 59 00:04:28,880 --> 00:04:30,996 So... I got in the shower 60 00:04:31,080 --> 00:04:33,548 with all my clothes on. 61 00:04:33,640 --> 00:04:35,596 I did. 62 00:04:37,440 --> 00:04:39,715 I must have been scared to death... 63 00:04:41,200 --> 00:04:43,350 but I don't remember being scared. 64 00:04:45,240 --> 00:04:47,993 Had a good night? 65 00:04:48,080 --> 00:04:50,355 Yeah. 66 00:04:51,800 --> 00:04:53,791 I'm Stuart. 67 00:04:53,880 --> 00:04:55,836 (Exasperated grunt) 68 00:04:57,920 --> 00:05:01,071 - Got somewhere to go? - No. 69 00:05:01,160 --> 00:05:03,390 Wanna come back to mine? 70 00:05:04,920 --> 00:05:06,797 I was fifteen. 71 00:05:06,880 --> 00:05:08,996 I did it the first time I went out. 72 00:05:09,080 --> 00:05:11,036 I'm quite proud of that. 73 00:05:11,120 --> 00:05:13,759 I'm dead proud of that. My first time out. 74 00:05:14,840 --> 00:05:17,149 Stuart Alan Jones. 75 00:05:17,240 --> 00:05:20,550 He's looking down at me. Like the face of God. 76 00:05:23,680 --> 00:05:25,511 OK. 77 00:05:35,560 --> 00:05:36,959 Bastard! 78 00:05:41,720 --> 00:05:44,632 Oh, leave me alone. Sod off back to the gym. 79 00:06:15,160 --> 00:06:17,276 Nice kitchen. 80 00:06:20,000 --> 00:06:24,551 It's great, it's really nice. I never cook. Takeaways - that's me. 81 00:06:34,160 --> 00:06:36,230 I'm always eating takeaways. 82 00:06:36,320 --> 00:06:38,311 Pizza. 83 00:06:43,800 --> 00:06:46,234 Mind you, I've gotta be careful. 84 00:06:46,320 --> 00:06:49,153 I can't eat anything. I've got this thing. 85 00:06:49,240 --> 00:06:53,199 It's called, like, anaphylactic shock. Your throat swells up. 86 00:06:53,280 --> 00:06:57,034 - Packet of peanuts could kill me... - You staying out here or what? 87 00:06:58,560 --> 00:07:00,835 We had this barbecue... 88 00:07:00,920 --> 00:07:02,956 last summer... 89 00:07:44,560 --> 00:07:46,835 Oh, what is he like? 90 00:07:46,920 --> 00:07:49,718 Go... away. 91 00:07:59,320 --> 00:08:01,834 - Nice car. - Yeah. It's not mine. 92 00:08:01,920 --> 00:08:04,673 - This where you live? - Yeah. 93 00:08:04,760 --> 00:08:08,275 Look, it's nice to meet you but I'm up early tomorrow 94 00:08:08,360 --> 00:08:12,911 and I was up early this morning and I'm working shifts and I'm really tired. 95 00:08:13,000 --> 00:08:16,276 Are we shagging, or what? It's pissing down. 96 00:08:26,680 --> 00:08:29,035 So what do you like doing? 97 00:08:31,280 --> 00:08:33,236 I like watching telly. 98 00:08:33,320 --> 00:08:37,279 - What do you like doing in bed? - Er, this is fine. 99 00:08:43,240 --> 00:08:45,196 Rimming? 100 00:08:45,280 --> 00:08:47,475 - Yeah. - Excellent. 101 00:08:52,680 --> 00:08:54,636 Go on, then. 102 00:08:57,560 --> 00:09:00,154 - What'd you mean, exactly? - (Phone) 103 00:09:05,760 --> 00:09:07,512 Yeah? 104 00:09:08,600 --> 00:09:10,033 No. 105 00:09:11,600 --> 00:09:13,556 No, when? 106 00:09:13,640 --> 00:09:15,596 When did that happen? 107 00:09:15,680 --> 00:09:19,309 Why didn't you phone me? Of course I've been out. 108 00:09:19,400 --> 00:09:22,710 - (Stifled groan) - Jesus Christ! Do you have to? 109 00:09:26,080 --> 00:09:29,595 No, it's just some bloke. What's your name? 110 00:09:29,680 --> 00:09:32,069 - Nathan. - Nathan, say hello to Lisa. 111 00:09:32,160 --> 00:09:34,151 - Hello. - So where is she now? 112 00:09:34,240 --> 00:09:35,878 Yeah? 113 00:09:35,960 --> 00:09:38,110 Right. Okey-doke. 114 00:09:39,320 --> 00:09:41,880 Right, well, thanks for that. 115 00:09:41,960 --> 00:09:43,996 Gotta go. 116 00:09:45,880 --> 00:09:49,156 (* Gabrielle: Give Me A Little More Time) 117 00:09:49,240 --> 00:09:51,231 God, you've got everything. 118 00:09:51,320 --> 00:09:55,950 Manga. Me dad's into manga. You got any porn? 119 00:09:56,040 --> 00:09:58,998 - One or two. Yeah? - Anything good? 120 00:10:00,160 --> 00:10:02,230 American stuff. 121 00:10:03,520 --> 00:10:05,909 I've got some Cadinot. 122 00:10:06,000 --> 00:10:07,956 It's much better. 123 00:10:08,040 --> 00:10:10,076 It's actually got a plot. 124 00:10:10,160 --> 00:10:12,958 This one's good. Service Actif. 125 00:10:13,040 --> 00:10:16,396 Been trying to find Service Actif Deux. 126 00:10:16,480 --> 00:10:19,358 Apparently, it's been deleted. I can't s... 127 00:10:20,520 --> 00:10:23,398 - Shall I put it on? - I haven't got time, really. 128 00:10:23,480 --> 00:10:27,439 Can we just get on with it? Sorry, but it's nearly three o'clock. 129 00:10:27,520 --> 00:10:30,432 - Fine. - (Belt unbuckling) 130 00:10:31,520 --> 00:10:33,954 (Phone) 131 00:10:34,040 --> 00:10:37,077 - I'd better just... - Can't you just leave it? 132 00:10:37,160 --> 00:10:39,151 I've, erm... 133 00:10:46,520 --> 00:10:49,318 - Hello? - Vince. Emergency. 134 00:10:49,400 --> 00:10:52,039 I need the car. It's happened. 135 00:10:52,120 --> 00:10:55,556 No. No! When? 136 00:10:55,640 --> 00:10:59,315 Hours ago. I can't believe it. My mobile was off. 137 00:10:59,400 --> 00:11:02,790 Who phoned you? Lisa? What happened? Who was there? 138 00:11:02,880 --> 00:11:05,269 There was no one there. Just those women. 139 00:11:06,400 --> 00:11:08,550 God. 140 00:11:10,560 --> 00:11:12,516 Oh, my God. 141 00:11:18,280 --> 00:11:20,840 Oh-ho-ho, my God! 142 00:11:22,720 --> 00:11:25,280 Look, I really can't stay long. 143 00:11:25,360 --> 00:11:27,874 Who's that? You've got someone there. 144 00:11:27,960 --> 00:11:31,316 'Er, er, no, really, it's fine.' 145 00:11:31,400 --> 00:11:35,313 Forget the car, we'll get a taxi. You've copped off. That's a first. 146 00:11:35,400 --> 00:11:38,676 No, really, really, I haven't. 147 00:11:40,640 --> 00:11:43,279 - I'll get the car. - 'Don't you dare.' 148 00:11:43,360 --> 00:11:47,638 I'll get a cab. Shag him blind, kick him out, I'll see you there. 149 00:11:47,720 --> 00:11:50,678 - 'No, really, really, I... ' - (Beep) 150 00:11:55,200 --> 00:11:57,919 It's my friend. His mother's in hospital. 151 00:11:58,000 --> 00:12:00,036 They think it's serious. 152 00:12:00,120 --> 00:12:02,554 - I'll have to go. - That's a pity. 153 00:12:02,640 --> 00:12:05,757 - I was really looking forward to that. - Me too. 154 00:12:05,840 --> 00:12:07,910 I'll phone you a taxi. 155 00:12:09,400 --> 00:12:11,675 - What's happened? - Everything. 156 00:12:13,040 --> 00:12:15,793 I'll have to go, anyway. I've got college. 157 00:12:18,600 --> 00:12:21,398 College... or school? 158 00:12:22,360 --> 00:12:24,430 Sixth-form college. 159 00:12:25,880 --> 00:12:28,440 - How old are you? - 18. 160 00:12:28,520 --> 00:12:30,909 What year were you born? 161 00:12:31,000 --> 00:12:34,151 - 1981. - Bollocks. You had to think about it. 162 00:12:34,240 --> 00:12:37,755 No one has to think about what year they were born. 163 00:12:38,840 --> 00:12:41,115 How old are you? 164 00:12:41,200 --> 00:12:43,156 16. 165 00:12:47,440 --> 00:12:49,590 How old are you, really? 166 00:12:51,720 --> 00:12:53,676 15. 167 00:13:03,160 --> 00:13:05,594 (Driver) Is it on account? (Stuart) Yeah. 168 00:13:05,680 --> 00:13:08,069 (Vince) Where've you been? (Stuart) Come on. 169 00:13:08,160 --> 00:13:10,833 (Vince) You had to bring him, didn't you? 170 00:13:31,160 --> 00:13:32,912 Oh, my God. 171 00:13:35,440 --> 00:13:37,874 - (Baby crying) - Oh, my God. 172 00:13:37,960 --> 00:13:40,520 Here he is. This is him. 173 00:13:43,280 --> 00:13:45,919 Hold his head. Careful. 174 00:13:47,560 --> 00:13:50,757 Started this morning. Ten o'clock tonight, there he was. 175 00:13:50,840 --> 00:13:53,354 - I wanted to be there. - No, you didn't. 176 00:13:53,440 --> 00:13:55,556 It's like a car crash down there. 177 00:13:55,640 --> 00:13:59,394 Oh, God. Funny shaped head. He's... 178 00:13:59,480 --> 00:14:02,040 Ugly, aren't they? He doesn't look like me. 179 00:14:02,120 --> 00:14:06,193 We weren't talking about names, because that's up to you and Romey. 180 00:14:06,280 --> 00:14:08,919 But I just looked at him and said, "Frederick?" 181 00:14:09,000 --> 00:14:11,912 - I quite like it. - What, in an ironic sort of way? 182 00:14:12,000 --> 00:14:14,434 - Yeah. - No, it's not ironic enough. 183 00:14:14,520 --> 00:14:19,310 What about Alfred? That way, you've still got the Fred bit. Run a check on Alfred. 184 00:14:19,400 --> 00:14:23,757 Alf Roberts, Alfie, Michael Caine. Alf - that American sitcom with the puppet - 185 00:14:23,840 --> 00:14:28,152 bit dodgy. But that's forgotten by the time he's in school. Unless it's on cable. 186 00:14:28,240 --> 00:14:31,198 I bet they've got it on Bravo. Oh. 187 00:14:31,280 --> 00:14:36,274 Alfred's the name of Batman's butler - marvellous. Good name. 188 00:14:36,360 --> 00:14:38,999 Alfred. What do you think? 189 00:14:39,920 --> 00:14:42,753 - Great. - He's mine. 190 00:14:42,840 --> 00:14:44,990 Aren't you going to introduce us? 191 00:14:45,080 --> 00:14:47,275 Er, what was your name again? 192 00:14:47,360 --> 00:14:51,911 - Nathan. - Oh, you've met. Lisa was on the phone 193 00:14:52,000 --> 00:14:54,958 - when Nathan shot his load all over me. - For God's sake. 194 00:14:55,040 --> 00:14:57,918 Well, he did. He's 15, aren't you, Nate? 195 00:14:58,000 --> 00:15:02,039 - You both had a child on the same night. - He's brought the trophy cabinet. 196 00:15:02,120 --> 00:15:06,511 The most important phone call of my life and he was there. I couldn't leave him. 197 00:15:06,600 --> 00:15:08,556 You wanted to come, didn't you? 198 00:15:08,640 --> 00:15:10,596 Yeah. 199 00:15:15,640 --> 00:15:17,756 Romey, what the fuck have we done? 200 00:15:20,280 --> 00:15:22,236 Oh, shit. 201 00:15:28,160 --> 00:15:31,755 Yes, yes, yes. 202 00:15:31,840 --> 00:15:33,956 Take off your watch. 203 00:15:34,040 --> 00:15:37,999 (Nurse) Excuse me, please. (Porter) Mind your backs. 204 00:15:39,080 --> 00:15:41,992 Yes, yes, yes. 205 00:15:42,080 --> 00:15:44,719 You're good, Vince. You'll do good things. 206 00:15:44,800 --> 00:15:47,872 - Could you tell if I had cancer? - Why would you have it? 207 00:15:47,960 --> 00:15:52,112 - I always think I've got cancer. - She'll love it. Yeah, thanks, bye. 208 00:15:52,200 --> 00:15:55,636 Bloody Ken - he's sending flowers. I should have got flowers. 209 00:15:55,720 --> 00:15:58,792 Nathan, get some flowers, quick as you can. 210 00:15:58,880 --> 00:16:02,236 You can't use your mobile. You'll switch off the iron lungs. 211 00:16:02,320 --> 00:16:04,470 There's a thought - I should have a cigar. 212 00:16:04,560 --> 00:16:07,233 You don't have to do what he says. 213 00:16:08,320 --> 00:16:10,276 I... I don't mind. 214 00:16:10,360 --> 00:16:12,510 I'll, erm, just get some... 215 00:16:12,600 --> 00:16:14,670 (Low talking, coughing) 216 00:16:56,120 --> 00:16:58,634 (Vince) Blimey, bit nippy. 217 00:16:58,720 --> 00:17:02,156 Look, you can see my mother's house from here. 218 00:17:05,200 --> 00:17:07,634 Come on, let's go back down. 219 00:17:16,760 --> 00:17:18,830 It's weird, isn't it? 220 00:17:20,640 --> 00:17:22,915 I mean, he's real. 221 00:17:23,000 --> 00:17:25,719 Just seeing him, it's like... 222 00:17:25,800 --> 00:17:29,031 I dunno what it's like. I mean, it's brilliant. 223 00:17:29,120 --> 00:17:31,350 But it's weird. 224 00:17:31,440 --> 00:17:34,193 The most expensive wank I've ever had. 225 00:17:40,000 --> 00:17:42,468 Oh, that's right, top yourself. 226 00:17:42,560 --> 00:17:46,439 That's what they do in soaps. Birth and death in the same episode. 227 00:17:46,520 --> 00:17:50,911 Get down. You've gotta be responsible now... dad. 228 00:17:57,600 --> 00:18:00,717 That's it. Arms out. Titanic! 229 00:18:01,800 --> 00:18:05,349 - King of the world! - I'm always Kate Winslet. 230 00:18:05,440 --> 00:18:08,193 King of the world! 231 00:18:28,960 --> 00:18:30,916 Congratulations. 232 00:18:39,040 --> 00:18:40,996 Oh, my God. 233 00:18:41,080 --> 00:18:43,150 Vince, hard-on. 234 00:18:43,240 --> 00:18:45,196 I have not. 235 00:18:45,280 --> 00:18:49,319 I didn't know you cared. No one's looking. Go on, get it out, get it out. 236 00:18:49,400 --> 00:18:53,075 Fuck off. Six months since I've had a shag. 237 00:18:53,160 --> 00:18:55,230 It's like Pavlov's dogs. 238 00:18:55,320 --> 00:18:57,834 You sad bastard. 239 00:19:10,800 --> 00:19:13,030 - Stuart. - Had him. 240 00:19:13,120 --> 00:19:15,873 You're going home. You're going to sleep, 241 00:19:15,960 --> 00:19:18,554 you're getting up and you're going to work. 242 00:19:18,640 --> 00:19:23,191 Then, you can work hard for the next 20 years. You've got a kid to look after now. 243 00:19:23,280 --> 00:19:26,238 Absolutely, I promise. Yes. 244 00:19:29,440 --> 00:19:31,715 Want one? 245 00:19:31,800 --> 00:19:33,950 All right, more for me. 246 00:19:39,120 --> 00:19:42,476 Right. Nathan, let's go. It's all getting a bit lesbian in here. 247 00:19:42,560 --> 00:19:44,915 My waters have broken! 248 00:19:49,320 --> 00:19:52,278 (Stuart) He's a calendar, that kid, he's a clock. 249 00:19:52,360 --> 00:19:56,512 A great big stopwatch just staring me in the face. 250 00:19:56,600 --> 00:19:58,955 As he gets older, that's all he can do. 251 00:20:00,040 --> 00:20:02,918 Do you know what that means? 252 00:20:03,000 --> 00:20:05,309 I'm getting older. 253 00:20:05,400 --> 00:20:07,868 (Sniggers) Mind you... 254 00:20:07,960 --> 00:20:11,077 they don't always live. (Laughs) 255 00:20:11,160 --> 00:20:13,720 Meningitis - that's a good one. 256 00:20:13,800 --> 00:20:16,633 (Vince) Stuart, what have you taken? 257 00:20:16,720 --> 00:20:19,792 That's not E. You only took it five minutes ago. 258 00:20:19,880 --> 00:20:23,316 - What is it? - Don't know. It was expensive. 259 00:20:23,400 --> 00:20:27,075 You don't even know what you're taking. You twat. 260 00:20:27,160 --> 00:20:29,116 Hmm. 261 00:20:39,880 --> 00:20:43,634 - (Horn beeps, tyres screech) - Shit! Fuck! 262 00:20:44,640 --> 00:20:47,108 Look, leave him alone. 263 00:20:47,200 --> 00:20:49,316 I'll take him home. 264 00:20:52,800 --> 00:20:57,635 I'm gonna fuck you. I'm gonna fuck you all night, yeah? Is that what you want? 265 00:20:57,720 --> 00:20:59,836 I'm taking him home. 266 00:21:03,560 --> 00:21:07,109 - I'm going with him. - Good boy. (Laughs) 267 00:21:42,400 --> 00:21:44,356 (Nathan moaning) 268 00:21:58,520 --> 00:22:00,476 (Gasping) 269 00:22:03,800 --> 00:22:06,758 No one told you about that, did they? 270 00:22:32,840 --> 00:22:34,796 That's it. 271 00:22:34,880 --> 00:22:36,757 Slowly. 272 00:22:37,840 --> 00:22:39,796 That's all of them. 273 00:22:41,480 --> 00:22:43,914 All the football team. 274 00:22:44,000 --> 00:22:46,719 All the what? 275 00:22:46,800 --> 00:22:49,997 All of them - naked and in shorts. (Laughing) 276 00:22:52,400 --> 00:22:58,111 And the referee's going, "Yes... yes... yes... 277 00:22:58,200 --> 00:23:00,156 "In we go." 278 00:23:00,240 --> 00:23:02,708 (Gasps) Slowly. Really. 279 00:23:02,800 --> 00:23:05,394 (* Doctor Who theme) 280 00:23:09,440 --> 00:23:13,672 - 'Ahh! ' - 'Die.' 281 00:23:13,760 --> 00:23:17,150 - 'I will bring Sutekh's gift of death... ' ...gift of death... 282 00:23:17,240 --> 00:23:19,834 - '... to all humanity.' ...to all humanity. 283 00:23:19,920 --> 00:23:22,309 - 'Ahh! ' - (* Doctor Who theme) 284 00:23:28,320 --> 00:23:30,276 (Alarm bleeps) 285 00:23:46,720 --> 00:23:48,676 (Car alarm) 286 00:23:55,000 --> 00:23:57,150 Oi! 287 00:24:03,480 --> 00:24:05,471 You little bastards. 288 00:24:06,560 --> 00:24:09,028 - You poof! - We seen you! We seen you! 289 00:24:09,120 --> 00:24:11,076 You fucking queer! 290 00:24:40,720 --> 00:24:42,950 For fuck's sake. 291 00:24:46,880 --> 00:24:49,189 - What the hell is that? - You did this map 292 00:24:49,280 --> 00:24:52,636 of all the places you've had a shag. It starts out Manchester, 293 00:24:52,720 --> 00:24:55,598 but that bit's Denmark and then you went to New York. 294 00:24:55,680 --> 00:24:59,514 All right, I know. You might have stopped me. 295 00:24:59,600 --> 00:25:02,478 I'll have to get it painted again, now. Shit. 296 00:25:02,560 --> 00:25:05,120 It's the pens. I've gotta get rid of the pens. 297 00:25:06,000 --> 00:25:08,673 Right, well, gotta go. 298 00:25:19,440 --> 00:25:21,396 God, the state of me. 299 00:25:23,360 --> 00:25:25,828 - What happened to the car? - Vince took it. 300 00:25:25,920 --> 00:25:28,718 - Good, he'll bring it back. - Can I have a shower? 301 00:25:28,800 --> 00:25:30,756 Hurry up, then. 302 00:25:32,200 --> 00:25:36,273 - Oh, what is that? - It's the Millennium Dome. 303 00:25:36,360 --> 00:25:40,876 - You met that bloke... - That wasn't ecstasy. That fucking Anita. 304 00:25:40,960 --> 00:25:43,520 I bet she sold me dog-worming tablets again. 305 00:25:43,600 --> 00:25:46,034 Go on then, shower! 306 00:25:48,200 --> 00:25:51,670 I'm such a twat. I am such a twat. 307 00:26:10,720 --> 00:26:15,748 'Don't panic. It's Romey, I'm in hospital. The contractions have started... ' 308 00:26:15,840 --> 00:26:17,796 Fuck, I've got a baby. 309 00:26:25,080 --> 00:26:28,436 Why doesn't anyone stop me? It's not my fault. 310 00:26:29,920 --> 00:26:31,990 They should stop me. 311 00:26:38,520 --> 00:26:40,192 Hey. 312 00:26:53,160 --> 00:26:57,358 - (* Pulp: Something Changed) - (Beeps horn) 313 00:26:57,440 --> 00:26:59,396 He's here. 314 00:27:10,160 --> 00:27:12,799 Oh, excellent. Well done, Vince. 315 00:27:12,880 --> 00:27:16,031 Then don't give me the car. I've warned you before. 316 00:27:16,120 --> 00:27:19,032 - It was those kids. - Doesn't matter. Company car. 317 00:27:19,120 --> 00:27:21,554 Now, let's get our little lad to school. 318 00:27:21,640 --> 00:27:26,316 *... kiss to celebrate here today... 319 00:27:28,440 --> 00:27:31,113 * Something changed... * 320 00:27:31,200 --> 00:27:33,350 What's his name again? 321 00:27:35,760 --> 00:27:38,513 (Boy) Saw him down the chippy, and he said, "No." 322 00:27:38,600 --> 00:27:41,114 And I said, "You did." Just a liar, isn't he? 323 00:27:41,200 --> 00:27:44,112 - (Girl) She went mental. - (School bell) 324 00:27:44,200 --> 00:27:46,236 (Chatter, indistinct) 325 00:27:52,360 --> 00:27:55,158 (Vince) Pull in. (Stuart) He's going to school. 326 00:27:55,240 --> 00:27:57,834 - Pull in here. - I'll take him to the door. 327 00:27:57,920 --> 00:28:01,799 - (* Suede: Beautiful Ones) - Stuart, they'll see the car. 328 00:28:01,880 --> 00:28:03,836 So? 329 00:28:03,920 --> 00:28:06,309 *... meat to the beat... * - (Beeps horn) 330 00:28:06,400 --> 00:28:10,154 * High on diesel and gasoline 331 00:28:10,240 --> 00:28:15,360 * Psycho for drum machine shaking their bits to the hits 332 00:28:15,440 --> 00:28:20,798 * Oh, here they come, the beautiful ones 333 00:28:20,880 --> 00:28:23,394 * The beautiful ones 334 00:28:23,480 --> 00:28:25,436 * La la la la... * 335 00:28:25,520 --> 00:28:27,636 Ooh! 336 00:28:27,720 --> 00:28:30,075 (Boy) Is that your mum? 337 00:28:30,160 --> 00:28:32,720 First lesson - home economics. 338 00:28:32,800 --> 00:28:35,155 - Batty man. - You twat. 339 00:28:35,240 --> 00:28:37,117 (Boys puckering) 340 00:28:37,200 --> 00:28:39,634 * You don't do without it... * 341 00:28:40,640 --> 00:28:42,631 - Can I see you again? - Let's just go. 342 00:28:43,720 --> 00:28:46,359 - Can I see you again? - You can see me now. 343 00:28:46,440 --> 00:28:48,908 - Nathan, where've you been? - Piss off. 344 00:28:49,000 --> 00:28:51,560 Aw, now, your little friend. 345 00:28:51,640 --> 00:28:55,155 - I could meet you tonight. - God knows where I'll be. 346 00:28:55,240 --> 00:28:58,357 - I could be in lpswich. - Come on, boys, give us a kiss. 347 00:28:58,440 --> 00:29:02,353 I'll give you a good fuck, you tight little virgin. 348 00:29:02,440 --> 00:29:05,955 We're going now, Stuart. Just shut your face and drive. 349 00:29:06,040 --> 00:29:09,350 - Can I see you, though? - Oh, you'll see me all right. 350 00:29:09,440 --> 00:29:11,476 You can't miss me. 351 00:29:12,120 --> 00:29:15,795 * La la la la la 352 00:29:18,040 --> 00:29:22,875 * La la, la la la-la la la-la 353 00:29:22,960 --> 00:29:25,155 * La la la la la la 354 00:29:25,240 --> 00:29:27,196 * La-la-la-la, la la... * 355 00:29:27,280 --> 00:29:29,840 - (Wolf whistle) - Who's the bloke, Maloney? 356 00:29:29,920 --> 00:29:32,593 Your boyfriend? 357 00:29:32,680 --> 00:29:34,716 (Boy) You poof. 358 00:29:41,760 --> 00:29:44,479 (Boy laughing) What's he doing? 359 00:29:45,560 --> 00:29:48,154 I was just a shag. I knew that. 360 00:29:49,320 --> 00:29:51,515 I suppose I fell in love a bit. 361 00:29:51,600 --> 00:29:55,149 Like you do. I thought, "I'll never see him again". 362 00:29:56,400 --> 00:29:58,994 How was I to know? 363 00:29:59,080 --> 00:30:01,150 Stuart Alan Jones. 364 00:30:03,480 --> 00:30:06,392 Six months later, he was begging me to stay. 365 00:30:06,480 --> 00:30:08,675 (* Air: Sexy Boy) 366 00:30:12,400 --> 00:30:15,551 * Sexy boy 367 00:30:21,160 --> 00:30:23,594 * Sexy boy... * 368 00:30:23,680 --> 00:30:26,319 - The chicken has landed. - Shit. 369 00:30:29,520 --> 00:30:31,715 He said he loved me. 370 00:30:39,800 --> 00:30:41,791 Come on up. 371 00:30:45,120 --> 00:30:47,156 You're friends with a cunt. 372 00:30:47,240 --> 00:30:49,674 - * Sexy boy... * - Thought I'd get ready. 373 00:30:50,305 --> 00:30:56,725 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org27947

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