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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,438 --> 00:00:06,049 YO-O-O, JOE! 2 00:00:06,136 --> 00:00:08,834 ♪ HE'LL FIGHT FOR FREEDOM WHEREVER THERE'S TROUBLE ♪ 3 00:00:08,921 --> 00:00:10,619 ♪ G.I. JOE IS THERE 4 00:00:10,706 --> 00:00:12,273 ♪ G.I. JOE 5 00:00:12,360 --> 00:00:14,014 ♪ A REAL AMERICAN HERO 6 00:00:14,101 --> 00:00:16,277 ♪ G.I. JOE IS THERE 7 00:00:16,364 --> 00:00:19,236 ♪ IT'S G.I. JOE AGAINST COBRA THE ENEMY ♪ 8 00:00:19,323 --> 00:00:21,586 ♪ FIGHTING TO SAVE THE DAY 9 00:00:21,673 --> 00:00:24,459 ♪ HE NEVER GIVES UP, HE'S ALWAYS THERE ♪ 10 00:00:24,546 --> 00:00:27,636 ♪ FIGHTING FOR FREEDOM OVER LAND AND AIR ♪ 11 00:00:27,723 --> 00:00:29,203 ♪ G.I. JOE ♪ 12 00:00:29,290 --> 00:00:31,118 ♪ A REAL AMERICAN HERO 13 00:00:31,205 --> 00:00:34,208 ♪ G.I. JOE IS THERE 14 00:00:34,295 --> 00:00:36,210 Announcer: G.I. JOE IS THE CODE NAME 15 00:00:36,297 --> 00:00:39,691 FOR AMERICA'S DARING, HIGHLY TRAINED SPECIAL-MISSION FORCE. 16 00:00:39,778 --> 00:00:43,347 ITS PURPOSE -- TO DEFEND HUMAN FREEDOM AGAINST COBRA, 17 00:00:43,434 --> 00:00:45,262 A RUTHLESS TERRORIST ORGANIZATION 18 00:00:45,349 --> 00:00:47,090 DETERMINED TO RULE THE WORLD. 19 00:00:47,177 --> 00:00:48,657 ♪ HE NEVER GIVES UP 20 00:00:48,744 --> 00:00:50,398 ♪ HE'LL STAY TILL THE FIGHT'S WON ♪ 21 00:00:50,485 --> 00:00:52,269 ♪ G.I. JOE WILL DARE 22 00:00:52,356 --> 00:00:53,662 ♪ G.I. JOE 23 00:00:53,749 --> 00:00:55,620 ♪ A REAL AMERICAN HERO 24 00:00:55,707 --> 00:01:00,060 ♪ G.I. JOE 25 00:01:02,497 --> 00:01:03,802 Jezebel: WHERE IS SHE?! 26 00:01:03,889 --> 00:01:07,023 WHERE IS THAT NO GOOD, THIEVING MADAME VERSAILLES? 27 00:01:07,110 --> 00:01:10,983 NOBODY RIPS OFF JEZEBEL AND GETS AWAY WITH IT. 28 00:01:11,071 --> 00:01:13,682 PLEASE, MISS JEZEBEL, DON'T MAKE A SCENE. 29 00:01:13,769 --> 00:01:16,598 MADAME VERSAILLES IS WAITING FOR YOU IN HER OFFICE. 30 00:01:16,685 --> 00:01:19,862 GOOD. I WANT TO TALK TO HER. 31 00:01:22,082 --> 00:01:24,345 She's on her way inside. 32 00:01:27,739 --> 00:01:29,437 [ SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY ] 33 00:01:29,524 --> 00:01:32,135 UH, MADAME VERSAILLES, THIS IS -- 34 00:01:32,222 --> 00:01:34,181 YES. JEZEBEL. 35 00:01:34,268 --> 00:01:38,359 THE BRASH, YOUNG UPSTART WHO CLAIMS THAT WHICH IS MINE. 36 00:01:38,446 --> 00:01:41,666 LISTEN, SWEETHEART, YOU SWIPED MY YOUTH TREATMENT. 37 00:01:41,753 --> 00:01:44,626 WHY, YOU UNPRINCIPLED TART! 38 00:01:44,713 --> 00:01:46,802 THE VERSAILLES YOUTH TREATMENT HAS BEEN A SECRET 39 00:01:46,889 --> 00:01:49,326 IN MY FAMILY FOR GENERATIONS. 40 00:01:49,413 --> 00:01:51,241 LADIES, LADIES, PLEASE. 41 00:01:51,328 --> 00:01:54,810 WE'RE HERE TO SETTLE THIS MATTER, NOT ESCALATE IT. 42 00:01:54,897 --> 00:01:57,508 NOW, BOTH PARTIES HAVE AGREED 43 00:01:57,595 --> 00:02:01,208 TO LET THE OTHER LOOK AT THEIR SECRET TREATMENTS AS A SHOW OF, 44 00:02:01,295 --> 00:02:05,516 UH, GOOD FAITH TO PROVE NEITHER STOLE IDEAS FROM THE OTHER. 45 00:02:05,603 --> 00:02:08,302 MADAME VERSAILLES, IF YOU WOULD START? 46 00:02:08,389 --> 00:02:10,042 YES. 47 00:02:10,130 --> 00:02:13,785 BUT NOT UNTIL SHE SHOWS ME HERS. 48 00:02:15,396 --> 00:02:16,875 Jezebel: OKAY. 49 00:02:20,923 --> 00:02:21,837 Versailles: WHAT'S THIS? 50 00:02:21,924 --> 00:02:23,621 Jezebel: THANKS, CHUMPS. 51 00:02:23,708 --> 00:02:25,536 COBRA WILL PAY A PRETTY PENNY 52 00:02:25,623 --> 00:02:27,669 FOR YOUR AGE-CONTROL FORMULA. 53 00:02:27,756 --> 00:02:30,759 CAREFUL, ZARANA, YOU MIGHT HAVE TO EAT THOSE WORDS. 54 00:02:30,846 --> 00:02:33,196 EAT THIS! 55 00:02:33,283 --> 00:02:34,371 HYAH! 56 00:02:34,458 --> 00:02:35,590 UNH! 57 00:02:35,677 --> 00:02:39,115 Zarana: NICE TRY, MADAME. 58 00:02:41,335 --> 00:02:44,251 THERE ARE JOES IN THE AREA! GUARD MY ESCAPE! 59 00:02:46,905 --> 00:02:49,256 ZARANA'S GETTING AWAY WITH THE FORMULA! 60 00:02:49,343 --> 00:02:51,475 YO-O-O, JOE! 61 00:02:51,562 --> 00:02:53,608 "YO, JOE" THIS, DOG BREATH! 62 00:02:53,695 --> 00:02:54,957 RIGHT ON! 63 00:02:57,394 --> 00:02:59,831 LET'S CLEAN UP SOME OF THIS FILTH. 64 00:03:01,137 --> 00:03:02,182 WHOA! 65 00:03:02,269 --> 00:03:04,923 WAY TO GO, DIAL TONE! 66 00:03:05,010 --> 00:03:06,969 PINHEADS! 67 00:03:17,719 --> 00:03:19,199 BLAST! OUT OF RANGE. 68 00:03:19,286 --> 00:03:21,679 AND THEY GOT AWAY WITH THE ONLY COPY 69 00:03:21,766 --> 00:03:24,204 OF VERSAILLES' SECRET PROCESS. 70 00:03:24,291 --> 00:03:27,032 Flint: I WANT TO THANK YOU FOR MAKING THE TIME TO SEE US, SPARKS. 71 00:03:27,119 --> 00:03:28,425 WE REALLY NEED YOUR HELP. 72 00:03:28,512 --> 00:03:31,385 HEY, ANYTHING TO HELP OLD COMRADES IN ARMS. 73 00:03:31,472 --> 00:03:33,561 ONCE A JOE, ALWAYS A JOE. 74 00:03:33,648 --> 00:03:36,433 WE'VE BEEN TRYING TO FIGURE OUT THE CONNECTION BETWEEN COBRA 75 00:03:36,520 --> 00:03:38,218 AND MADAME VERSAILLES' FORMULA. 76 00:03:38,305 --> 00:03:39,697 I THINK I CAN HELP YOU. 77 00:03:39,784 --> 00:03:41,090 AFTER YOU CALLED, 78 00:03:41,177 --> 00:03:43,397 I HAD THIS TAPE PULLED FROM THE NETWORK LIBRARY. 79 00:03:43,484 --> 00:03:46,400 IT MAY BE THE CONNECTION YOU'RE LOOKING FOR. 80 00:03:46,487 --> 00:03:48,053 HI. I'M DONNA DASHER. 81 00:03:48,140 --> 00:03:49,533 AND I'M BRETT TINKER. 82 00:03:49,620 --> 00:03:50,795 AND WE'RE HERE TO TELL YOU 83 00:03:50,882 --> 00:03:52,580 WHY WE'RE SO YOUNG AND BEAUTIFUL. 84 00:03:52,667 --> 00:03:55,583 THE REASON IS THE AGELESS CARE PROCESS. 85 00:03:55,670 --> 00:03:57,149 [ Chuckling ] I'M IMPRESSED. 86 00:03:57,237 --> 00:03:58,499 THAT'S A PRETTY BIG ENDORSEMENT 87 00:03:58,586 --> 00:04:00,457 FROM TWO OF THE BIGGEST STARS IN AMERICA. 88 00:04:00,544 --> 00:04:03,678 I'LL SAY. DONNA DASHER IS A TOP BOX-OFFICE DRAW, 89 00:04:03,765 --> 00:04:06,898 AND TINKER WAS VOTED THE NFL's MOST VALUABLE PLAYER LAST YEAR. 90 00:04:06,985 --> 00:04:08,509 THAT'S NOT THE HALF OF IT. 91 00:04:08,596 --> 00:04:10,859 THEY'RE DOING THE ADS FOR NOTHING -- FREE. 92 00:04:10,946 --> 00:04:12,295 THAT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE. 93 00:04:12,382 --> 00:04:13,731 THERE'S MORE. 94 00:04:13,818 --> 00:04:17,257 AGELESS CARE IS A SUBSIDIARY OF EXTENSIVE ENTERPRISES. 95 00:04:17,344 --> 00:04:19,737 COBRA'S CORPORATION. I DON'T GET IT. 96 00:04:19,824 --> 00:04:22,262 WHAT DO THEY HOPE TO GAIN FROM ALL THIS? 97 00:04:22,349 --> 00:04:25,090 I DON'T KNOW, BUT WE'D BETTER SEND A TEAM OUT 98 00:04:25,177 --> 00:04:28,920 TO THE AGELESS CARE SPA IN CALIFORNIA TO FIND OUT. 99 00:04:29,007 --> 00:04:32,620 Flint: INVESTIGATIVE WORK'S A BIT OUT OF OUR LINE, LADY JAYE. 100 00:04:32,707 --> 00:04:35,231 WELL, THE BOYS CAN USE A CHANGE OF PACE. 101 00:04:36,580 --> 00:04:38,539 [ AIR HORN BLOWS ] 102 00:04:42,978 --> 00:04:45,502 HEY! WATCH WHERE YOU'RE GOING, YOU STUPID -- 103 00:04:45,589 --> 00:04:48,505 HOW'D YOU GET YOUR LICENSE? BY MAIL ORDER? 104 00:04:48,592 --> 00:04:50,899 SORRY! 105 00:04:50,986 --> 00:04:52,770 GRANDPA, LOOK. UP IN THE SKY. 106 00:04:52,857 --> 00:04:54,598 HEY! 107 00:04:58,950 --> 00:05:00,474 HEY, GUYS. 108 00:05:00,561 --> 00:05:02,171 HI, THERE, FLINT, LADY JAYE. 109 00:05:02,258 --> 00:05:03,564 I HOPE THEY CAN GET -- 110 00:05:05,435 --> 00:05:09,178 MAN, LOOK AT THAT CRAZY MOTORBIKE. 111 00:05:09,265 --> 00:05:11,441 [ TIRES SCREECH ] 112 00:05:11,528 --> 00:05:12,877 HEY, WHAT'S HAPPENING? 113 00:05:12,964 --> 00:05:14,662 I HOPE THEY CAN GET HERE WITHOUT -- 114 00:05:14,749 --> 00:05:16,620 [ GRUNTS ] 115 00:05:20,711 --> 00:05:22,017 [ LAUGHS ] 116 00:05:22,104 --> 00:05:24,889 YOU HOPE THEY CAN GET HERE WITHOUT WHAT, FLINT? 117 00:05:24,976 --> 00:05:27,588 WITHOUT BEING TOO CONSPICUOUS. 118 00:05:27,675 --> 00:05:29,329 [ LAUGHS ] 119 00:05:32,810 --> 00:05:34,203 Donna: HI. I'M DONNA DASHER. 120 00:05:34,290 --> 00:05:36,031 Brett: AND I'M BRETT TINKER. 121 00:05:36,118 --> 00:05:37,249 Donna: AND WE'RE HERE TO TELL YOU 122 00:05:37,337 --> 00:05:39,034 WHY WE'RE SO YOUNG AND BEAUTIFUL. 123 00:05:39,121 --> 00:05:42,211 THE REASON IS THE AGELESS CARE PROCESS. 124 00:05:42,298 --> 00:05:44,909 YOU DRAGGED US 3,000 MILES FROM HEADQUARTERS 125 00:05:44,996 --> 00:05:46,694 JUST TO WATCH COMMERCIALS? 126 00:05:46,781 --> 00:05:49,653 IT APPEARS THAT EXTENSIVE ENTERPRISES IS BEHIND 127 00:05:49,740 --> 00:05:51,438 THE AGELESS CARE PROCESS, 128 00:05:51,525 --> 00:05:53,875 AND WHERE EXTENSIVE ENTERPRISES IS, 129 00:05:53,962 --> 00:05:56,834 COBRA CAN'T BE WRIGGLING FAR BEHIND. 130 00:05:56,921 --> 00:05:58,880 WELL, IF I WERE IN CHARGE OF THIS MISSION, 131 00:05:58,967 --> 00:06:00,534 I'D STAGE A DIRECT ASSAULT. 132 00:06:00,621 --> 00:06:03,319 Flint: BUT YOU'RE NOT. THANK GOODNESS. 133 00:06:03,406 --> 00:06:04,842 I HEARD THAT. 134 00:06:04,929 --> 00:06:06,278 Flint: SIT DOWN, BEACH HEAD. 135 00:06:06,366 --> 00:06:07,889 [ GROANS ] 136 00:06:07,976 --> 00:06:09,238 NOW, LISTEN, EVERYBODY. 137 00:06:09,325 --> 00:06:11,458 WE'RE GOING TO DIVIDE UP INTO THREE TEAMS. 138 00:06:11,545 --> 00:06:14,939 LADY JAYE AND GUNG-HO WILL MONITOR THE AGELESS CARE SPA. 139 00:06:15,026 --> 00:06:17,768 DIAL TONE AND MAINFRAME WILL PAY TINKER A VISIT. 140 00:06:17,855 --> 00:06:20,249 AND SCI-FI AND I WILL VISIT MISS DASHER 141 00:06:20,336 --> 00:06:21,772 ON THE SET OF HER NEW MOVIE. 142 00:06:21,859 --> 00:06:24,253 YEAH. I CAN DIG THAT. 143 00:06:24,340 --> 00:06:26,473 HA, HA! FIGURES. 144 00:06:26,560 --> 00:06:28,257 Donna: IF YOU REALLY WANT TO FIND OUT 145 00:06:28,344 --> 00:06:31,303 WHAT COMMERCIALS I'VE DONE, YOU SHOULD CONTACT MY MANAGER. 146 00:06:31,391 --> 00:06:33,567 Flint: BUT, MISS DASHER, ALL WE NEED TO KNOW 147 00:06:33,654 --> 00:06:36,396 IS WHY YOU'RE DOING THE AGELESS CARE COMMERCIALS FOR NOTHING. 148 00:06:36,483 --> 00:06:40,574 I SAID CALL MY MANAGER AND STOP BUGGING ME! 149 00:06:40,661 --> 00:06:43,272 WELL, NOW WHAT, BOSS? 150 00:06:43,359 --> 00:06:45,709 LET'S HANG AROUND AND GIVE IT ANOTHER TRY LATER. 151 00:06:48,451 --> 00:06:50,845 HENRY, LEND ME YOUR WHISTLE A SEC. 152 00:06:50,932 --> 00:06:53,151 MISS DASHER, NO! 153 00:06:53,238 --> 00:06:55,023 [ WHISTLE BLOWS ] 154 00:06:55,110 --> 00:06:56,938 [ ELEPHANTS TRUMPET ] 155 00:07:02,465 --> 00:07:03,945 WHAT THE... 156 00:07:07,122 --> 00:07:08,863 LET'S GET OUT OF HERE! 157 00:07:15,304 --> 00:07:16,610 SCI-FI, UP HERE! 158 00:07:16,697 --> 00:07:18,089 RIGHT BEHIND YOU. 159 00:07:26,837 --> 00:07:28,622 LOOK OUT! 160 00:07:28,709 --> 00:07:29,971 [ SCREAMS ] 161 00:07:45,813 --> 00:07:46,857 LOOK OUT! 162 00:07:46,944 --> 00:07:48,337 [ SCREAMS ] 163 00:07:51,862 --> 00:07:53,647 UNH! AAH! 164 00:07:54,691 --> 00:07:55,866 UNH! 165 00:07:55,953 --> 00:07:58,173 WE'VE GOT TO STOP THOSE ELEPHANTS! 166 00:07:58,260 --> 00:07:59,435 [ ELEPHANTS TRUMPETING ] 167 00:07:59,522 --> 00:08:01,350 Flint: FLASH GRENADES. 168 00:08:01,437 --> 00:08:03,483 THESE WILL BRIGHTEN UP THEIR DAY. 169 00:08:12,970 --> 00:08:14,885 LET'S ROUND UP THESE PACHYDERMS! 170 00:08:14,972 --> 00:08:16,844 [ ENGINE TURNS OVER ] 171 00:08:22,980 --> 00:08:25,330 Sci-Fi: THEY'RE HEADING FOR THE COMMISSARY! 172 00:08:25,417 --> 00:08:26,897 GET CLOSE TO THEM! 173 00:08:26,984 --> 00:08:29,030 I'LL TRY TO TURN THEM WITH THESE! 174 00:08:29,117 --> 00:08:31,685 [ TRUMPETING CONTINUES ] 175 00:08:31,772 --> 00:08:33,556 CLOSER! CLOSER! 176 00:08:33,643 --> 00:08:35,776 [ INDISTINCT SHOUTING ] 177 00:08:44,393 --> 00:08:47,962 Flint: LET'S TRY TO CORRAL THESE DOGGIES IN STAGE 9! 178 00:08:48,049 --> 00:08:49,398 LOTS OF LUCK! 179 00:08:51,792 --> 00:08:53,184 Flint: CLOSER! 180 00:08:58,015 --> 00:09:00,540 Man: ALL RIGHT, EVERYBODY! QUIET ON THE SET! 181 00:09:00,627 --> 00:09:03,543 ROLL CAMERA. AND... 182 00:09:03,630 --> 00:09:04,979 [ RUMBLING ] 183 00:09:05,066 --> 00:09:06,197 Man: ...ACTION! 184 00:09:06,284 --> 00:09:09,026 [ INDISTINCT SHOUTING ] 185 00:09:10,158 --> 00:09:12,203 CUT! CUT! 186 00:09:12,290 --> 00:09:14,249 THIS IS NOT IN THE SCRIPT! 187 00:09:14,336 --> 00:09:16,599 [ ELEPHANTS TRUMPET ] 188 00:09:20,298 --> 00:09:21,865 GET THOSE DOORS! 189 00:09:26,522 --> 00:09:27,915 [ ELEPHANTS TRUMPET ] 190 00:09:28,002 --> 00:09:30,700 WHEW! NOTHING LIKE A LITTLE EXCITEMENT. 191 00:09:33,573 --> 00:09:36,750 YEAH. COURTESY OF MISS DASHER. 192 00:09:36,837 --> 00:09:38,273 Brett: 74! 23! 193 00:09:38,360 --> 00:09:39,491 [ GRUNTS ] 194 00:09:39,579 --> 00:09:41,450 SPLIT RIGHT ON TWO. HUT! 195 00:09:41,537 --> 00:09:43,408 [ GRUNTS ] 196 00:09:44,888 --> 00:09:47,151 BOY, THAT BRETT TINKER SURE CAN KICK A FOOTBALL. 197 00:09:47,238 --> 00:09:48,239 OH, HERE HE COMES. 198 00:09:48,326 --> 00:09:49,763 HEY. YOU GUYS WANT TO TALK TO ME? 199 00:09:49,850 --> 00:09:53,070 YEAH. YOU DID A COMMERCIAL FOR THE AGELESS CARE PROCESS. 200 00:09:53,157 --> 00:09:55,203 SO? IS THERE A LAW AGAINST THAT? 201 00:09:55,290 --> 00:09:57,901 WE WERE JUST WONDERING WHY YOU REFUSED PAYMENT. 202 00:09:57,988 --> 00:10:00,251 I'LL TELL YOU WHAT -- WAIT RIGHT HERE, 203 00:10:00,338 --> 00:10:01,905 AND I'LL HAVE AN ANSWER FOR YOU IN A MINUTE. 204 00:10:01,992 --> 00:10:03,777 WHAT DO YOU THINK HE MEANT BY THAT? 205 00:10:03,864 --> 00:10:05,953 Brett: NOW, LISTEN. 206 00:10:06,040 --> 00:10:08,346 THERE'S A COUPLE OF GUYS OVER THERE I COULD DO WITHOUT. 207 00:10:08,433 --> 00:10:10,914 [ ALL GROWL ] 208 00:10:11,001 --> 00:10:14,048 GIVE ME RED LEFT 25 WITH SOME PASS INTERFERENCE 209 00:10:14,135 --> 00:10:17,791 AND, UH, A LITTLE UNNECESSARY ROUGHNESS. 210 00:10:17,878 --> 00:10:19,140 GET MY DRIFT? 211 00:10:19,227 --> 00:10:21,664 YEAH! ALL RIGHT! 212 00:10:21,751 --> 00:10:25,102 Brett: LISTEN! 72, 15, 49! 213 00:10:25,189 --> 00:10:26,930 HUT! HUT! HUT! HUT! 214 00:10:27,017 --> 00:10:28,628 [ ALL GROWL ] 215 00:10:32,066 --> 00:10:33,720 HEY! 216 00:10:33,807 --> 00:10:36,113 MY FIRST PRO INTERCEPTION! 217 00:10:38,072 --> 00:10:39,073 UH-OH. 218 00:10:39,160 --> 00:10:40,727 [ ALL GRUNT ] 219 00:10:42,772 --> 00:10:44,469 UNH! 220 00:10:46,167 --> 00:10:48,822 HMM. 27 MINOR CUTS AND ABRASIONS, 221 00:10:48,909 --> 00:10:50,519 BUT NO SERIOUS INJURIES. 222 00:10:50,606 --> 00:10:51,738 [ Chuckling ] YOU GUYS WERE LUCKY. 223 00:10:51,825 --> 00:10:53,870 YEAH. WE RECEIVED VIOLENT REACTIONS 224 00:10:53,957 --> 00:10:55,959 FROM BOTH OF THE STARS WE INTERVIEWED. 225 00:10:56,046 --> 00:10:58,048 WELL, I LEARNED SOMETHING. 226 00:10:58,135 --> 00:11:02,270 EACH OF THOSE STARS WORKS OUT AT THE AGELESS CARE SPA 227 00:11:02,357 --> 00:11:04,011 RIGHT HERE IN BEVERLY HILLS. 228 00:11:04,098 --> 00:11:06,143 THEN THAT'S OUR NEXT STOP. 229 00:11:06,230 --> 00:11:07,579 WAIT A MINUTE. 230 00:11:07,667 --> 00:11:09,581 MAYBE IT WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA 231 00:11:09,669 --> 00:11:13,107 TO CHANGE INTO SOMETHING A LITTLE LESS CONSPICUOUS. 232 00:11:13,194 --> 00:11:16,719 Mainframe: MAN, HAVE YOU EVER SEEN SO MANY ROLLS-ROYCES AND BENTLEYS 233 00:11:16,806 --> 00:11:18,025 IN ALL YOUR LIFE? 234 00:11:18,112 --> 00:11:19,809 Dial Tone: IN THESE DUDS, WE FIT RIGHT IN. 235 00:11:19,896 --> 00:11:23,291 YEAH, BUT HOW CAN ANYBODY WORK OUT IN CLOTHES LIKE THESE? 236 00:11:23,378 --> 00:11:25,336 [ Chuckling ] IT'S BEVERLY HILLS, FLINT. 237 00:11:25,423 --> 00:11:27,687 IT'S STYLE, NOT SWEAT, THAT COUNTS HERE. 238 00:11:31,865 --> 00:11:33,954 OH, UH, GOOD MORNING. WE HAVE AN APPOINTMENT. 239 00:11:34,041 --> 00:11:36,783 AH, YES. 240 00:11:36,870 --> 00:11:38,523 WE'VE BEEN EXPECTING YOU. 241 00:11:38,610 --> 00:11:41,178 WELCOME TO THE AGELESS CARE SPA. 242 00:11:42,353 --> 00:11:45,313 HMM. LOOK AT THEM, THE NINCOMPOOPS. 243 00:11:45,400 --> 00:11:48,185 THEIR DISGUISES DON'T FOOL ME. 244 00:11:48,272 --> 00:11:50,753 PREPARE THE STEAM AND SUN ROOMS. 245 00:11:50,840 --> 00:11:54,670 OUR PROBLEMS WITH THE JOES WILL SOON BE OVER. 246 00:11:54,757 --> 00:11:56,106 Instructor: OKAY, EVERYBODY. 247 00:11:56,193 --> 00:11:58,021 THAT WILL DO IT FOR YOUR FIRST WORKOUT. 248 00:11:58,108 --> 00:12:00,415 NOW LET'S VISIT THE SUN AND STEAM ROOMS. 249 00:12:00,502 --> 00:12:03,940 YOU'RE REALLY GOING TO ENJOY THIS. 250 00:12:04,027 --> 00:12:05,420 THIS IS THE STEAM ROOM. 251 00:12:05,507 --> 00:12:07,117 STEP IN AND TRY IT OUT. 252 00:12:07,204 --> 00:12:10,033 TINY WILL ASSIST YOU. 253 00:12:10,120 --> 00:12:11,948 THE REST OF YOU, STEP THIS WAY. 254 00:12:12,035 --> 00:12:14,690 I'LL SHOW YOU TO THE SUN ROOM. 255 00:12:14,777 --> 00:12:17,127 JUST MAKE YOURSELVES COMFORTABLE. 256 00:12:17,214 --> 00:12:19,782 I'LL SET THE TIMER FOR FIVE MINUTES. 257 00:12:19,869 --> 00:12:21,131 [ BEEP ] 258 00:12:21,218 --> 00:12:23,220 Instructor: ALL OF YOU JUST RELAX. 259 00:12:23,307 --> 00:12:27,137 I'LL SET THE TIMER FOR FIVE MINUTES. 260 00:12:27,224 --> 00:12:28,573 I DON'T KNOW. 261 00:12:28,660 --> 00:12:30,924 THERE'S SOMETHING STRANGE ABOUT THIS PLACE, FLINT. 262 00:12:31,011 --> 00:12:34,275 I KNOW, BUT THERE'S A COBRA CONNECTION HERE, 263 00:12:34,362 --> 00:12:35,929 AND WE'VE GOT TO FIND IT. 264 00:12:36,016 --> 00:12:37,974 ALL SET, ZARANA. 265 00:12:38,061 --> 00:12:39,149 GOOD. 266 00:12:39,236 --> 00:12:42,065 NOW LET'S JOIN DR. MINDBENDER. 267 00:12:44,764 --> 00:12:47,984 I-I FEEL WEIRD. 268 00:12:48,071 --> 00:12:51,858 [ Weakly ] MAYBE -- MAYBE WE SHOULD GET OUT OF HERE. 269 00:12:51,945 --> 00:12:54,425 [ High-pitched voice ] I -- I AGREE. 270 00:12:54,512 --> 00:12:56,863 [ High-pitched voice ] HEY, WHAT'S HAPPENING TO ME? 271 00:12:56,950 --> 00:13:00,170 [ High-pitched voice ] THE STEAM IS -- IS SHRINKING US! 272 00:13:00,257 --> 00:13:03,957 SOMETHING FUNNY GOING ON. 273 00:13:04,044 --> 00:13:06,350 LOOK. MY HANDS! 274 00:13:06,437 --> 00:13:10,180 THE LIGHT. IT'S AGING US. 275 00:13:10,267 --> 00:13:12,922 [ Weakly ] WE...GOT TO GET OUT OF HERE. 276 00:13:13,009 --> 00:13:15,185 [ LAUGHS ] 277 00:13:15,272 --> 00:13:17,361 WELL DONE, ZARANA. 278 00:13:17,448 --> 00:13:20,669 TINY! GO. DISPOSE OF THEM. 279 00:13:20,756 --> 00:13:22,671 [ GRUNTS ] 280 00:13:22,758 --> 00:13:24,325 I CAN'T BUDGE IT. 281 00:13:24,412 --> 00:13:26,457 LET'S ALL TRY. 282 00:13:26,544 --> 00:13:30,505 [ ALL GRUNT ] 283 00:13:30,592 --> 00:13:32,028 IT'S NO USE. 284 00:13:32,115 --> 00:13:33,682 WE DON'T HAVE THE STRENGTH. 285 00:13:33,769 --> 00:13:35,249 WELL, LOOK AT US. 286 00:13:35,336 --> 00:13:37,468 WE HAVE THE BODIES OF 7-YEAR-OLDS. 287 00:13:37,555 --> 00:13:40,384 HMM. I WONDER WHAT'S HAPPENED TO THE OTHERS. 288 00:13:40,471 --> 00:13:43,779 GUNG-HO, SCI-FI, GIVE ME A HAND. 289 00:13:43,866 --> 00:13:46,216 CAN'T. TOO WEAK. 290 00:13:46,303 --> 00:13:48,697 I'LL HELP YOU. 291 00:13:48,784 --> 00:13:50,481 ON THREE. 292 00:13:50,568 --> 00:13:53,615 ONE...TWO... 293 00:13:53,702 --> 00:13:54,790 THREE! 294 00:13:54,877 --> 00:13:56,357 [ VIPER LAUGHS ] 295 00:13:56,444 --> 00:13:58,533 [ BOTH GROAN ] 296 00:13:58,620 --> 00:14:00,752 Flint: COBRA VIPERS. 297 00:14:14,636 --> 00:14:17,117 Flint: COBRA VIPERS! 298 00:14:17,204 --> 00:14:18,422 RUN FOR IT! 299 00:14:18,509 --> 00:14:20,076 COME ON, OLD MAN. 300 00:14:20,163 --> 00:14:21,425 TIME FOR YOUR NAP. 301 00:14:21,512 --> 00:14:23,384 [ SHOUTING IN DISTANCE ] 302 00:14:23,471 --> 00:14:26,039 STOP! GET OFF! 303 00:14:26,126 --> 00:14:27,518 THERE'S ACTION OUT IN THE HALL. 304 00:14:27,605 --> 00:14:29,259 EVERYBODY CLOSE TO THE DOOR. 305 00:14:29,346 --> 00:14:31,174 WHEN THEY OPEN IT THE DOOR, RUSH THEM. 306 00:14:31,261 --> 00:14:32,480 HYAH! 307 00:14:32,567 --> 00:14:33,742 [ GRUNTS ] 308 00:14:33,829 --> 00:14:35,352 YO-O-O, JOE! 309 00:14:35,439 --> 00:14:37,659 NOT SO FAST, PEEWEE. 310 00:14:37,746 --> 00:14:39,574 WHO ARE YOU CALLING PEEWEE? 311 00:14:39,661 --> 00:14:41,010 COME ON! OW! 312 00:14:41,097 --> 00:14:43,795 NOW LET'S GO FIND THE REST OF THE TEAM. 313 00:14:45,841 --> 00:14:47,582 GOOD LUCK, MAINFRAME. 314 00:14:47,669 --> 00:14:49,279 [ GRUNTING ] 315 00:14:49,366 --> 00:14:51,107 GET OUT OF HERE. 316 00:14:51,194 --> 00:14:53,501 LET ME GO! 317 00:14:53,588 --> 00:14:55,807 All: YO-O-O, JOE! 318 00:14:55,895 --> 00:14:57,722 AAH! 319 00:14:57,809 --> 00:15:00,551 LADY JAYE, WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU? 320 00:15:00,638 --> 00:15:03,511 ME? YOU DON'T LOOK SO HOT YOURSELF, FLINT. 321 00:15:03,598 --> 00:15:05,513 [ ROARS ] 322 00:15:06,993 --> 00:15:08,255 THROUGH HERE! HURRY! 323 00:15:08,342 --> 00:15:10,779 Jaye: COME ON, OLD TIMER. 324 00:15:10,866 --> 00:15:13,825 [ FLINT GROANING ] 325 00:15:14,957 --> 00:15:15,958 Jaye: COME ON! 326 00:15:16,045 --> 00:15:17,394 Flint: WE'RE COMING. 327 00:15:17,481 --> 00:15:19,179 Sci-Fi: FAST AS WE CAN. 328 00:15:19,266 --> 00:15:21,050 UNH! 329 00:15:21,137 --> 00:15:22,965 HEY, WHAT'S GOING ON? 330 00:15:23,052 --> 00:15:26,229 OFFICER, ARREST THAT MAN! HE'S A COBRA VIPER. 331 00:15:26,316 --> 00:15:27,927 HE'S TRYING TO CAPTURE US. 332 00:15:28,014 --> 00:15:30,625 Officer: SO, HE'S A COBRA VIPER, IS HE? 333 00:15:30,712 --> 00:15:32,279 THAT'S RIGHT. COBRA'S GOT SOME SORT 334 00:15:32,366 --> 00:15:35,282 OF UNDERCOVER OPERATION GOING ON IN THAT HEALTH SPA. 335 00:15:35,369 --> 00:15:38,589 I SEE. AND WHO ARE ALL OF YOU SUPPOSED TO BE? 336 00:15:38,676 --> 00:15:40,026 THE SIX MUSKETEERS? 337 00:15:40,113 --> 00:15:43,072 NOW SCRAM! I'VE GOT ENOUGH HOOLIGANS ON MY BEAT. 338 00:15:43,159 --> 00:15:45,248 GO! GET OUT OF HERE! 339 00:15:45,335 --> 00:15:47,511 [ LAUGHS ] 340 00:15:51,907 --> 00:15:53,039 NO SIGNS OF LIFE. 341 00:15:53,126 --> 00:15:54,910 COBRA MUST HAVE SPLIT. 342 00:15:54,997 --> 00:15:56,607 YOU GUYS STAY HERE AND KEEP AN EYE -- 343 00:15:56,694 --> 00:15:58,740 [ TIRES SCREECH ] UH-OH. 344 00:15:58,827 --> 00:16:00,960 [ SIREN WAILS ] 345 00:16:01,047 --> 00:16:04,398 COME ON. I'M GONNA TRY AND GET INSIDE. 346 00:16:04,485 --> 00:16:05,616 GIVE ME A BOOST. 347 00:16:05,703 --> 00:16:08,532 I THINK I CAN GET IN THROUGH THAT VENT. 348 00:16:08,619 --> 00:16:11,709 [ GRUNTS ] 349 00:16:11,796 --> 00:16:14,234 Mainframe: WATCH OUT FOR THEIR SECURITY SYSTEM. 350 00:16:14,321 --> 00:16:16,888 NO TELLING WHAT COBRA'S GOT RIGGED UP IN THERE. 351 00:16:27,464 --> 00:16:28,509 UNH! 352 00:16:35,559 --> 00:16:37,997 Jaye: COBRA'S SECURITY SYSTEM. 353 00:16:41,783 --> 00:16:43,045 UNH! 354 00:16:45,308 --> 00:16:46,396 YO! 355 00:16:49,356 --> 00:16:53,012 LOOK OUT! GET AWAY FROM THE DOORS! 356 00:16:53,099 --> 00:16:54,752 LOOKS LIKE WE'RE NOT GETTING IN TONIGHT. 357 00:16:54,839 --> 00:16:56,493 Woman: BUT YOU MUST GET IN. 358 00:16:56,580 --> 00:16:59,148 IF YOU DON'T, MY CAREER WILL BE RUINED. 359 00:16:59,235 --> 00:17:01,759 MISS DASHER, WHAT HAPPENED? 360 00:17:01,846 --> 00:17:05,198 I TOLD THE AGELESS CARE PEOPLE I WASN'T GOING TO DO 361 00:17:05,285 --> 00:17:09,941 ANY MORE FREE COMMERCIALS, AND THEY DID THIS TO ME. 362 00:17:10,029 --> 00:17:12,118 THEY ROBBED ME OF MY YOUTH. 363 00:17:12,205 --> 00:17:15,251 WELL, YOU SHOULD HAVE TOLD US WHAT THEY WERE UP TO 364 00:17:15,338 --> 00:17:16,948 WHEN YOU HAD THE CHANCE. 365 00:17:17,036 --> 00:17:18,428 NOW THEY'VE CLEARED OUT. 366 00:17:18,515 --> 00:17:20,822 C-CAN'T YOU CONTACT YOUR HEADQUARTERS 367 00:17:20,909 --> 00:17:22,258 AND TELL THEM WHAT HAPPENED? 368 00:17:22,345 --> 00:17:25,609 WE CAN'T SHOW UP LIKE THIS. TOO EMBARRASSING. 369 00:17:25,696 --> 00:17:28,917 IF WE COULD ONLY REVERSE THE PROCESS. 370 00:17:29,004 --> 00:17:30,440 MAYBE... 371 00:17:30,527 --> 00:17:31,659 MAYBE WHAT? 372 00:17:31,746 --> 00:17:34,618 WELL, THEY HAVE A FACTORY OUT IN THE DESERT. 373 00:17:34,705 --> 00:17:37,534 THEY TOOK ME THERE ONCE TO SHOOT A COMMERCIAL. 374 00:17:37,621 --> 00:17:40,189 DRAG OUT YOUR COBRA CREDIT CARD, MISS DASHER. 375 00:17:40,276 --> 00:17:43,279 WE'RE GONNA MAKE SOME LATE-NIGHT PURCHASES. 376 00:17:55,509 --> 00:17:58,512 A JOB WELL DONE, DR. MINDBENDER. 377 00:17:58,599 --> 00:18:03,082 ONCE THE WORLD UNDERSTANDS WE OWN THE ANTI-AGING PROCESS, 378 00:18:03,169 --> 00:18:06,781 THEIR VANITY WILL BEAT A PATH TO OUR DOOR. 379 00:18:06,868 --> 00:18:11,046 STRIKING THE ENEMY'S WEAKEST POINT IS ALWAYS WISE STRATEGY, 380 00:18:11,133 --> 00:18:13,092 OH, GREAT SERPENTOR. 381 00:18:15,833 --> 00:18:16,921 [ TIRES SCREECH ] 382 00:18:17,008 --> 00:18:19,098 THIS IS PRIVATE PROPERTY. BEAT IT! 383 00:18:19,185 --> 00:18:23,145 EXCUSE ME. CAN YOU TELL ME HOW TO GET TO YUMA ROAD? 384 00:18:23,232 --> 00:18:25,582 Mainframe: CAN WE GET A HAMBURGER, GRANDPA? 385 00:18:25,669 --> 00:18:27,410 Flint: [ Chuckling ] GRANDKIDS. 386 00:18:27,497 --> 00:18:29,151 TAKING THEM ON A VACATION. 387 00:18:29,238 --> 00:18:31,240 UM, GOT A RESTROOM THEY CAN USE? 388 00:18:31,327 --> 00:18:32,937 IT'S BEEN A LONG TRIP. 389 00:18:33,024 --> 00:18:34,809 OH, ALL RIGHT. 390 00:18:34,896 --> 00:18:38,465 FIRST BUILDING ON YOUR LEFT, BUT NO SNOOPING AROUND. 391 00:18:38,552 --> 00:18:41,294 WE GOT TO FIND THE PROTOTYPE SUN AND STEAM ROOMS. 392 00:18:41,381 --> 00:18:44,471 THAT'S THE ONLY WAY WE CAN REVERSE THE PROCESS. 393 00:18:45,646 --> 00:18:47,430 WHO IS THAT? 394 00:18:47,517 --> 00:18:49,606 WHAT KIND OF SECURITY IS THIS? 395 00:18:49,693 --> 00:18:54,481 ARREST THE MAIN GATE GUARD AND SEIZE THAT VAN! 396 00:18:54,568 --> 00:18:56,526 Mindbender: STOP! YOU'RE TRESPASSING! 397 00:18:56,613 --> 00:18:59,312 STOP! 398 00:18:59,399 --> 00:19:01,792 HELLO, DR. MINDBENDER. 399 00:19:01,879 --> 00:19:03,185 REMEMBER US? 400 00:19:03,272 --> 00:19:04,404 WHAT?! 401 00:19:04,491 --> 00:19:05,535 YO -- 402 00:19:05,622 --> 00:19:08,190 YO-O-O, JOE! 403 00:19:10,279 --> 00:19:12,890 THIS WILL PUT A LITTLE COLOR IN YOUR CHEEKS. 404 00:19:12,977 --> 00:19:16,590 OH, NO! IT'S PAINT! 405 00:19:16,677 --> 00:19:21,029 [ Chuckling ] WHEN JOES DON'T HAVE WEAPONS, THEY IMPROVISE. 406 00:19:21,116 --> 00:19:23,684 YEAH, AND I CHARGED IT TO COBRA. 407 00:19:23,771 --> 00:19:25,164 AAH! 408 00:19:34,085 --> 00:19:38,002 NO ONE TAKES THE GREAT SERPENTOR BY SURPRISE! 409 00:19:38,089 --> 00:19:40,701 NO ONE! OUT OF MY WAY! 410 00:19:40,788 --> 00:19:43,660 THIS, I COMMAND! 411 00:19:43,747 --> 00:19:47,273 SIR, NO! YOU MUST NOT ENDANGER YOURSELF! 412 00:19:47,360 --> 00:19:49,492 LET US ESCORT YOU TO SAFETY! 413 00:19:49,579 --> 00:19:52,495 YES. PERHAPS YOU'RE RIGHT. 414 00:19:53,757 --> 00:19:55,629 HOLD IT, SMALL FRY. 415 00:19:55,716 --> 00:19:58,675 ZARANA. 416 00:19:58,762 --> 00:20:01,983 I FIGURED WE'D RUN INTO EACH OTHER AGAIN, MAINFRAME. 417 00:20:02,070 --> 00:20:03,680 YEAH. LOOK. 418 00:20:03,767 --> 00:20:05,073 WE AIN'T GOT MUCH TIME. 419 00:20:05,160 --> 00:20:07,684 THE PROTOTYPE SUN ROOM AND STEAM ROOM ARE IN THERE. 420 00:20:07,771 --> 00:20:09,033 YOU'LL NEED THIS. 421 00:20:09,120 --> 00:20:11,645 IT'S MADAME VERSAILLES' SECRET PROCEDURE. 422 00:20:11,732 --> 00:20:13,081 THANKS. 423 00:20:13,168 --> 00:20:15,344 NOW YOU BETTER GET LOST BEFORE SOMEONE SPOTS US. 424 00:20:31,578 --> 00:20:32,840 BRING THEM TO ME! 425 00:20:35,582 --> 00:20:36,844 [ GRUNTS ] 426 00:20:36,931 --> 00:20:39,586 LET ME GO! 427 00:20:39,673 --> 00:20:42,502 HMM. ALL BUT ONE ACCOUNTED FOR. 428 00:20:42,589 --> 00:20:43,851 WHERE COULD HE BE? 429 00:20:43,938 --> 00:20:45,983 Mainframe [ Normal voice ]: UP HERE, LAMEBRAIN. 430 00:20:46,070 --> 00:20:47,550 HE'S BACK TO NORMAL! 431 00:20:47,637 --> 00:20:50,771 YES. I FOUND THE PROTOTYPE SUN AND STEAM ROOMS, AND IT -- 432 00:20:50,858 --> 00:20:53,513 COME DOWN FROM THERE, OR -- OR WHAT? 433 00:20:53,600 --> 00:20:56,342 I REPROGRAMMED THE ROOMS, DR. MINDBENDER. 434 00:20:56,429 --> 00:20:58,561 IN FIVE MINUTES, THEY'RE GONNA SHORT OUT 435 00:20:58,648 --> 00:21:00,955 AND BLOW UP THIS WHOLE FACTORY. 436 00:21:01,042 --> 00:21:02,739 YOU'RE BLUFFING! 437 00:21:02,826 --> 00:21:03,958 Mainframe: TRY ME. 438 00:21:04,045 --> 00:21:05,133 ADIOS, DOCTOR. 439 00:21:05,220 --> 00:21:07,309 FOUR MINUTES, 30 SECONDS. 440 00:21:07,396 --> 00:21:08,745 WHAT DID HE SAY? 441 00:21:08,832 --> 00:21:10,704 COME BACK! IT'S A HOAX! 442 00:21:10,791 --> 00:21:12,662 BAH! COWARDS! 443 00:21:12,749 --> 00:21:14,229 ALL COWARDS! 444 00:21:14,316 --> 00:21:17,406 YOU! YOU'RE LYING! 445 00:21:18,668 --> 00:21:20,366 Mainframe: HA, HA. YOU KNOW, FOR ONCE, 446 00:21:20,453 --> 00:21:22,672 DR. MINDBENDER WAS TELLING THE TRUTH. 447 00:21:22,759 --> 00:21:24,239 THERE WAS NO BOOBY TRAP. 448 00:21:24,326 --> 00:21:25,327 [ LAUGHS ] 449 00:21:25,414 --> 00:21:26,589 I REALLY WAS BLUFFING. 450 00:21:26,676 --> 00:21:28,417 [ Normal voice ] Psst! FLINT. 451 00:21:28,504 --> 00:21:30,680 WE MADE A SLIGHT MISCALCULATION. 452 00:21:30,767 --> 00:21:32,682 MISCALCULATION? WHAT'S WRONG? 453 00:21:32,769 --> 00:21:36,599 I THINK I'VE GROWN A LITTLE TOO BIG FOR MY BRITCHES. 31086

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