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Previously on Young Sheldon...
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Would you teach me
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00:00:03,628 --> 00:00:05,547
how to throw a baseball?
4
00:00:03,628 --> 00:00:05,547
What's bringing this on?
5
00:00:07,841 --> 00:00:09,259
I don't know.
6
00:00:07,841 --> 00:00:09,259
You Coach Ballard?
7
00:00:09,342 --> 00:00:10,301
That'd be me.
8
00:00:10,385 --> 00:00:11,970
My daughter's here to try out.
9
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She made the team.
10
00:00:13,221 --> 00:00:15,557
Congratulations.
11
00:00:15,640 --> 00:00:18,184
And Meemaw got a
date with the coach.
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00:00:18,268 --> 00:00:19,936
I was married for 18 years,
13
00:00:20,019 --> 00:00:21,104
and I got to tell you,
those were the two best years
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00:00:21,187 --> 00:00:23,940
of my life.
15
00:00:33,032 --> 00:00:35,452
Practice running late?
16
00:00:35,535 --> 00:00:36,453
Yeah.
17
00:00:36,536 --> 00:00:39,831
The Sparks kid got himself
stuck in the bathroom.
18
00:00:41,166 --> 00:00:42,667
How'd that happen?
19
00:00:42,751 --> 00:00:45,795
Well, the door's a push
and he was a-pulling.
20
00:00:45,879 --> 00:00:48,923
Look at him out there.
21
00:00:49,007 --> 00:00:51,843
Billy's my grandson.
22
00:00:55,221 --> 00:00:56,765
I am so sorry. I...
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00:00:56,848 --> 00:00:58,141
I mean, not that
he's your grandson.
24
00:00:58,224 --> 00:01:01,686
I'm just...
I'm-a stop talking now.
25
00:01:01,770 --> 00:01:04,147
I'm messing with you.
26
00:01:04,230 --> 00:01:06,149
Well...
27
00:01:06,232 --> 00:01:09,068
You got me, all right.
28
00:01:10,069 --> 00:01:11,154
No.
29
00:01:11,237 --> 00:01:15,492
That one's mine over there.
Evan.
30
00:01:15,575 --> 00:01:19,204
I-isn't that
the coach's grandson?
31
00:01:20,413 --> 00:01:24,751
So you must be
Coach Ballard's ex-wife?
32
00:01:24,834 --> 00:01:27,128
Yeah. Why?
33
00:01:27,212 --> 00:01:31,132
No reason.
34
00:01:50,443 --> 00:01:54,364
Growing up, I had an aversionto any type of group.
35
00:01:54,447 --> 00:01:56,157
For example, rock groups.
36
00:01:56,241 --> 00:02:00,453
I'll restrict my drug useto Rolaids, thank you.
37
00:02:00,537 --> 00:02:03,122
Group costumes.
38
00:02:03,206 --> 00:02:05,708
I'll tell you who really didn'thave a heart: my mother,
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00:02:05,792 --> 00:02:07,502
for making me weara funnel on my head.
40
00:02:07,585 --> 00:02:10,046
But of all the groupsI didn't like,
41
00:02:10,129 --> 00:02:12,173
by far the worst was...
42
00:02:12,257 --> 00:02:13,883
Group projects.
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00:02:16,469 --> 00:02:18,096
Yeah. You heard me.
44
00:02:18,179 --> 00:02:21,391
This would be
a lot more fun with margaritas.
45
00:02:21,474 --> 00:02:23,101
What isn't?
46
00:02:23,184 --> 00:02:26,354
Then you'd love the way
I ran the PTA.
47
00:02:26,437 --> 00:02:28,398
And you'd love the way
I show up at church.
48
00:02:30,441 --> 00:02:32,360
You're fun.
49
00:02:32,443 --> 00:02:34,237
We ought to go out
for drinks one night.
50
00:02:34,320 --> 00:02:35,697
I'll give you my number.
51
00:02:35,780 --> 00:02:37,198
Yeah. Well...
52
00:02:37,282 --> 00:02:40,034
All right. I'm around
tomorrow if you're free.
53
00:02:40,118 --> 00:02:42,495
Sure.
54
00:02:44,289 --> 00:02:46,082
You should
know something, though.
55
00:02:47,292 --> 00:02:52,005
Um, I'm kind of
dating your ex-husband.
56
00:02:53,798 --> 00:02:56,426
You waited till now to tell me?
57
00:02:56,509 --> 00:02:59,137
You're sneaky. I like that.
58
00:02:59,220 --> 00:03:00,763
That is not the feedback
I usually get.
59
00:03:02,515 --> 00:03:05,310
Well, since we're being honest,
60
00:03:05,393 --> 00:03:07,061
I knew who you were
the whole time.
61
00:03:07,145 --> 00:03:09,397
That's why I came over here.
62
00:03:11,482 --> 00:03:14,777
Damn. Nicely played.
63
00:03:14,861 --> 00:03:17,113
So we're still on for drinks?
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00:03:17,196 --> 00:03:18,615
Hell yeah.
65
00:03:18,698 --> 00:03:21,075
Yeehaw.
66
00:03:22,160 --> 00:03:24,787
Can't we just
do this individually?
67
00:03:24,871 --> 00:03:27,248
Why are you complaining? I'm the
one stuck working with a kid.
68
00:03:27,332 --> 00:03:30,293
Hey. When it comes to physics,
I'm practically a coot.
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00:03:30,376 --> 00:03:32,962
Which is an old person word
for someone who's old.
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00:03:33,046 --> 00:03:34,130
Tell him.
71
00:03:34,213 --> 00:03:35,423
It is.
72
00:03:34,213 --> 00:03:35,423
Let's just go
73
00:03:35,506 --> 00:03:36,674
to a coffee shop
and get this over with.
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00:03:36,758 --> 00:03:39,928
I can't go now. I have to get
home for my bath and bedtime.
75
00:03:40,011 --> 00:03:42,138
Which is also something
an old person does.
76
00:03:42,221 --> 00:03:43,306
That we do.
77
00:03:43,389 --> 00:03:44,974
Can I at least switch groups?
78
00:03:45,058 --> 00:03:47,977
Sorry. I assigned this project
because it's important
79
00:03:48,061 --> 00:03:51,689
for scientists to learn
how to collaborate.
80
00:03:51,773 --> 00:03:53,441
If we must work together,
here's my proposal.
81
00:03:54,567 --> 00:03:56,986
I do everything by myself
and put their names on it.
82
00:03:57,070 --> 00:03:58,738
No.
83
00:03:57,070 --> 00:03:58,738
What's going on?
84
00:03:58,821 --> 00:04:01,032
Dr. Sturgis is forcing us
to collaborate.
85
00:04:02,367 --> 00:04:03,326
And we wanted to
get it done tonight,
86
00:04:03,409 --> 00:04:05,912
but apparently there's a
bedtime and shower conflict.
87
00:04:05,995 --> 00:04:06,996
Bubble bath.
88
00:04:07,080 --> 00:04:08,957
Right, it's bath night.
89
00:04:09,040 --> 00:04:10,959
How about we work
in my dorm tomorrow?
90
00:04:11,042 --> 00:04:12,168
Um, I don't know
91
00:04:12,251 --> 00:04:16,297
if a dormitory is the right
environment for someone his age.
92
00:04:16,381 --> 00:04:17,507
If you're worried
about the beer-drinking,
93
00:04:17,590 --> 00:04:20,510
Dad has thoroughly
desensitized me.
94
00:04:20,593 --> 00:04:23,930
How about you all
come work at our house?
95
00:04:24,013 --> 00:04:25,848
I guess
if that's our only option.
96
00:04:25,932 --> 00:04:28,476
It'll be fun. I'll make food.
97
00:04:28,559 --> 00:04:30,353
You can even bring your laundry.
98
00:04:30,436 --> 00:04:31,521
That actually would be great.
99
00:04:31,604 --> 00:04:33,523
Now this man's soiled underpants
100
00:04:33,606 --> 00:04:34,899
will be in my kitchen.
101
00:04:34,983 --> 00:04:36,484
Thank you.
102
00:04:38,444 --> 00:04:41,906
I-I just don't understand
why you want to go out with her.
103
00:04:41,990 --> 00:04:44,367
You don't? She seems like fun.
104
00:04:44,450 --> 00:04:46,327
Well, yeah, she is,
until you marry her
105
00:04:46,411 --> 00:04:49,247
and then you find her sleeping
upside down in the closet.
106
00:04:49,330 --> 00:04:50,540
No, I mean,
seriously.
107
00:04:50,623 --> 00:04:52,375
You don't think
that having drinks
108
00:04:52,458 --> 00:04:54,669
with my ex-wife
is a little weird?
109
00:04:54,752 --> 00:04:56,421
You went camping with John.
110
00:04:56,504 --> 00:04:58,006
It was weird.
111
00:04:58,089 --> 00:04:59,549
Trust me.
Learn from me.
112
00:04:59,632 --> 00:05:02,510
She spent 18 years with you.
I'd rather learn from her.
113
00:05:02,593 --> 00:05:05,221
So you can dig up
a little dirt on me?
114
00:05:05,304 --> 00:05:06,723
Yeah.
115
00:05:06,806 --> 00:05:08,558
Well, let me spoil it, then.
116
00:05:08,641 --> 00:05:10,101
She's gonna tell you
about the time
117
00:05:10,184 --> 00:05:12,270
I had a little too much
to drink on Halloween
118
00:05:12,353 --> 00:05:15,064
and I ended up puking
in my son's candy bucket.
119
00:05:15,148 --> 00:05:16,399
I bet she tells it better.
120
00:05:16,482 --> 00:05:17,775
Then there was the time
we had a fight
121
00:05:17,859 --> 00:05:20,236
and I locked her out
in a hailstorm.
122
00:05:17,859 --> 00:05:20,236
Damn.
123
00:05:20,319 --> 00:05:22,572
But in my defense, when I locked
her out it, it was raining.
124
00:05:22,655 --> 00:05:25,283
The hail was heaven-sent.
125
00:05:25,366 --> 00:05:26,659
You're a charmer.
126
00:05:27,660 --> 00:05:29,245
So...
127
00:05:29,328 --> 00:05:32,248
You didn't do anything you
regret when you were married?
128
00:05:32,331 --> 00:05:34,125
Lots of stuff.
129
00:05:34,208 --> 00:05:35,585
Feel free to grab a shovel
130
00:05:35,668 --> 00:05:37,587
and go have some drinks
with my dead husband.
131
00:05:37,670 --> 00:05:39,213
That's dark.
132
00:05:39,297 --> 00:05:41,215
Not as dark as my secrets.
133
00:05:41,299 --> 00:05:45,053
You-you... You are so hot.
134
00:05:47,055 --> 00:05:48,973
Ooh, chocolate chip.
135
00:05:49,057 --> 00:05:51,642
Just one. The rest
are for Sheldon's friends.
136
00:05:51,726 --> 00:05:53,603
Ready to go?
137
00:05:51,726 --> 00:05:53,603
Yep.
138
00:05:51,726 --> 00:05:53,603
Go where?
139
00:05:53,686 --> 00:05:54,479
The mall.
140
00:05:54,562 --> 00:05:56,022
What happened to
asking for permission?
141
00:05:56,105 --> 00:05:57,774
I asked Dad.
142
00:05:57,857 --> 00:05:59,776
You know that doesn't count.
143
00:05:59,859 --> 00:06:01,486
That's what he said.
144
00:06:01,569 --> 00:06:02,612
Bye.
145
00:06:02,695 --> 00:06:04,489
Love you.
146
00:06:06,866 --> 00:06:08,451
Keith, Sam, come in.
147
00:06:08,534 --> 00:06:10,078
Sheldon, your friends are here.
148
00:06:10,161 --> 00:06:11,621
Let me put
149
00:06:11,704 --> 00:06:13,623
that laundry in for you.
150
00:06:11,704 --> 00:06:13,623
Thank you.
151
00:06:13,706 --> 00:06:14,832
None for you?
152
00:06:14,916 --> 00:06:17,085
That's okay.
I can do my own laundry.
153
00:06:17,168 --> 00:06:19,545
Okay.
154
00:06:19,629 --> 00:06:21,547
Hello, Sam, Keith,
155
00:06:21,631 --> 00:06:24,592
big bag of dirty underpants.
156
00:06:25,551 --> 00:06:27,345
Hey, there.
157
00:06:27,428 --> 00:06:29,472
I hope you don't mind,
I started without you.
158
00:06:29,555 --> 00:06:31,265
Not at all.
159
00:06:31,349 --> 00:06:34,477
Is this one for me or am I gonna
be carrying you home tonight?
160
00:06:34,560 --> 00:06:36,604
It's all yours.
161
00:06:36,687 --> 00:06:38,314
Cheers.
162
00:06:39,774 --> 00:06:41,150
I like your blouse.
163
00:06:39,774 --> 00:06:41,150
You do?
164
00:06:41,234 --> 00:06:44,946
Truth be told,
I changed my outfit three times.
165
00:06:45,029 --> 00:06:46,989
For little old me?
166
00:06:47,073 --> 00:06:50,201
Well, I've never gotten drinks
with a boyfriend's ex-wife.
167
00:06:51,702 --> 00:06:52,620
Do you try to look hot
168
00:06:52,703 --> 00:06:54,163
or do you try to look like
you're not trying?
169
00:06:54,247 --> 00:06:56,040
Well, clearly, you went for hot.
170
00:06:56,124 --> 00:06:57,834
I wasn't even trying.
171
00:06:58,918 --> 00:07:00,878
I think we can explain
the additional electrons
172
00:07:00,962 --> 00:07:03,214
if we assume the barrier
has a slope to it.
173
00:07:03,297 --> 00:07:05,842
That won't work.
174
00:07:03,297 --> 00:07:05,842
Okay, well,
what if the electrons
175
00:07:05,925 --> 00:07:08,177
are a product of...
176
00:07:05,925 --> 00:07:08,177
We need to consider
that the electrons
177
00:07:08,261 --> 00:07:09,512
are actually
moving backwards
178
00:07:09,595 --> 00:07:10,346
in time.
179
00:07:10,429 --> 00:07:11,681
No, that math's
gonna take forever.
180
00:07:11,764 --> 00:07:12,849
Let's just do it my way.
181
00:07:12,932 --> 00:07:14,517
Can you write on the board?
182
00:07:14,600 --> 00:07:15,893
You probably have
the best handwriting.
183
00:07:15,977 --> 00:07:17,436
Why? Because I'm a girl?
184
00:07:17,520 --> 00:07:18,980
I'm sure it's better than mine.
185
00:07:19,063 --> 00:07:21,149
I only learned to write
six years ago.
186
00:07:23,442 --> 00:07:26,654
Well, we've covered football
and grandkids...
187
00:07:26,737 --> 00:07:28,406
Our favorite Golden Girl.
188
00:07:28,489 --> 00:07:30,992
Did not peg you for a Dorothy.
189
00:07:31,075 --> 00:07:33,870
What have we left out?
190
00:07:33,953 --> 00:07:36,330
I don't know.
191
00:07:36,414 --> 00:07:38,875
Maybe we've run out
of stuff to talk about.
192
00:07:38,958 --> 00:07:42,670
Wait. We forgot
about your ex-husband.
193
00:07:42,753 --> 00:07:45,882
The one you're dating.
194
00:07:46,966 --> 00:07:47,967
What do you want to know?
195
00:07:48,050 --> 00:07:50,887
Well, I know not to piss him off
during a hailstorm.
196
00:07:50,970 --> 00:07:52,221
He told you that?
197
00:07:52,305 --> 00:07:53,931
He wanted to throw himself
under the bus
198
00:07:54,015 --> 00:07:55,183
rather than let you push him.
199
00:07:55,266 --> 00:07:58,895
Well, did he tell you that I was
naked when he locked me out?
200
00:07:58,978 --> 00:08:01,898
No! Why did he do that?
201
00:08:01,981 --> 00:08:03,274
'Cause I was trying
to hit him with a golf club.
202
00:08:03,357 --> 00:08:05,067
What were you doing naked
203
00:08:05,151 --> 00:08:07,361
with a golf club in a hailstorm?
204
00:08:07,445 --> 00:08:10,948
You know, it was the '70s.
205
00:08:11,032 --> 00:08:14,076
I remember. What else you got?
206
00:08:14,160 --> 00:08:16,579
Hey, there's my man!
207
00:08:16,662 --> 00:08:18,372
The doctor's in the house!
208
00:08:19,373 --> 00:08:21,709
Hello, y'all!
209
00:08:19,373 --> 00:08:21,709
Boy.
210
00:08:27,965 --> 00:08:29,759
Hey!
211
00:08:31,010 --> 00:08:32,470
Connie!
212
00:08:32,553 --> 00:08:34,263
Hey, John.
213
00:08:34,347 --> 00:08:35,765
How?
214
00:08:35,848 --> 00:08:37,767
We used to date.
215
00:08:37,850 --> 00:08:39,936
So you dated him and Dale?
216
00:08:40,019 --> 00:08:42,104
You don't have a type, do you?
217
00:08:42,188 --> 00:08:43,481
What are you doing here?
218
00:08:43,564 --> 00:08:45,191
Me? What are you doing here?
219
00:08:45,274 --> 00:08:47,235
Well, this is where
I hang out now.
220
00:08:47,318 --> 00:08:48,819
I grade papers,
221
00:08:48,903 --> 00:08:50,947
I chat with the other patrons.
222
00:08:51,030 --> 00:08:56,535
The people who like to bet on
football rub my head for luck.
223
00:08:57,662 --> 00:08:59,121
John, this is June.
224
00:08:59,205 --> 00:09:00,790
Hi.
225
00:08:59,205 --> 00:09:00,790
June.
226
00:09:00,873 --> 00:09:05,920
After Juno, wife of Jupiter
and queen of the gods.
227
00:09:06,003 --> 00:09:09,757
No, after the fact that my mom
got knocked up in June.
228
00:09:09,840 --> 00:09:11,801
Ribald! Wonderful.
229
00:09:11,884 --> 00:09:13,928
So, um,
230
00:09:14,011 --> 00:09:15,763
how do you two know each other?
231
00:09:15,846 --> 00:09:17,890
Well, June here, actually,
232
00:09:17,974 --> 00:09:19,308
is Dale's ex-wife.
233
00:09:19,392 --> 00:09:22,979
And I am Connie's ex-boyfriend.
234
00:09:23,062 --> 00:09:26,774
Is that fun or weird?
235
00:09:26,857 --> 00:09:28,651
Yeah.
236
00:09:28,734 --> 00:09:31,862
Okay.
237
00:09:31,946 --> 00:09:34,031
Okay.
238
00:09:36,909 --> 00:09:39,203
All right, something's
not working out here.
239
00:09:39,287 --> 00:09:40,579
Perhaps it's the way
you're pacing.
240
00:09:40,663 --> 00:09:42,456
Pick a number of steps
and stick to it.
241
00:09:42,540 --> 00:09:44,458
Maybe it's because
you two aren't helping.
242
00:09:44,542 --> 00:09:46,669
Really? But I'm writing
with my prettiest handwriting.
243
00:09:46,752 --> 00:09:48,337
Don't be a child.
244
00:09:46,752 --> 00:09:48,337
Hey!
245
00:09:48,421 --> 00:09:50,172
You were talking to her.
246
00:09:50,256 --> 00:09:52,675
Who wants pigs in a blanket?
247
00:09:52,758 --> 00:09:53,801
Actually, do you have coffee?
248
00:09:53,884 --> 00:09:55,845
I just made a pot,
help yourself.
249
00:09:57,972 --> 00:10:00,683
Anything I could get you?
250
00:09:57,972 --> 00:10:00,683
I need a cigarette.
251
00:10:03,894 --> 00:10:05,021
So how's it going?
252
00:10:05,104 --> 00:10:06,731
Great. Now that
those two are gone,
253
00:10:06,814 --> 00:10:09,900
I can finally
get some work done.
254
00:10:14,447 --> 00:10:16,115
They call it
"Hot Dog on a Stick,"
255
00:10:16,198 --> 00:10:18,409
but that's not the only food
on a stick they sell.
256
00:10:18,492 --> 00:10:19,827
It's not?
257
00:10:19,910 --> 00:10:21,954
They also got
cheese on a stick.
258
00:10:19,910 --> 00:10:21,954
No.
259
00:10:25,791 --> 00:10:27,918
You hiding
from that guy?
260
00:10:25,791 --> 00:10:27,918
No.
261
00:10:28,002 --> 00:10:30,087
I get it,
you like him.
262
00:10:30,171 --> 00:10:31,297
Shut up.
263
00:10:31,380 --> 00:10:32,965
Aren't you a little young
for that?
264
00:10:33,049 --> 00:10:35,426
How old were you
when you started liking girls?
265
00:10:36,469 --> 00:10:37,720
Buh-bye. Bye.
266
00:10:37,803 --> 00:10:40,389
Hey, everybody,
free drinks on the house!
267
00:10:40,473 --> 00:10:41,891
Dang.
268
00:10:41,974 --> 00:10:43,893
Way older than you.
269
00:10:43,976 --> 00:10:47,229
Doesn't matter,
he doesn't like me anyway.
270
00:10:47,313 --> 00:10:49,607
Sorry.
271
00:10:51,150 --> 00:10:53,861
I liked it better when you
wanted to marry ALF.
272
00:10:53,944 --> 00:10:56,113
I still kind of do.
273
00:10:56,197 --> 00:10:59,867
So you went camping with Dale?
How'd that go?
274
00:10:59,950 --> 00:11:02,370
I hesitate
to speak ill of him...
275
00:11:02,453 --> 00:11:04,038
I divorced him.
Say what you want.
276
00:11:04,121 --> 00:11:06,874
Then, it was terrible.
277
00:11:04,121 --> 00:11:06,874
Ha!
278
00:11:06,957 --> 00:11:08,834
All right, come on, let's talk
about something else.
279
00:11:08,918 --> 00:11:10,252
Okay.
280
00:11:10,336 --> 00:11:11,921
A lot of people here
like to talk about the game.
281
00:11:12,004 --> 00:11:14,256
Really? You speak sports now?
282
00:11:14,340 --> 00:11:18,677
I sure do. Check this out.
283
00:11:18,761 --> 00:11:23,057
Hey, ref! I suggest you
go back to referee school
284
00:11:23,140 --> 00:11:27,144
and this time
pay attention in class!
285
00:11:27,228 --> 00:11:29,939
You tell him, Doc.
286
00:11:30,022 --> 00:11:31,273
You're a doctor?
287
00:11:31,357 --> 00:11:33,067
He has his PhD in physics,
288
00:11:33,150 --> 00:11:36,654
but his specialty
is quantum chromodynamics.
289
00:11:36,737 --> 00:11:39,115
Wow, that sounds interesting.
290
00:11:39,198 --> 00:11:42,076
It is. And I would
tell you more about it,
291
00:11:42,159 --> 00:11:44,829
but I'm lucky I remembered
the quantum chromodynamics.
292
00:11:44,912 --> 00:11:48,124
And you didn't even
have to rub his head.
293
00:11:48,207 --> 00:11:52,420
Well, it's here
if the mood strikes.
294
00:11:52,503 --> 00:11:54,797
Come on, Bucky,
295
00:11:54,880 --> 00:11:56,924
try throwing it to someone
on your own team.
296
00:11:57,007 --> 00:11:58,092
Is that the Aggie game?
297
00:11:58,175 --> 00:12:01,804
Yeah, we're down by ten.
298
00:12:01,887 --> 00:12:03,639
You like A&M?
299
00:12:03,722 --> 00:12:05,975
I was raised a Cornhusker,
but when in Texas...
300
00:12:06,058 --> 00:12:10,729
Science and sports?
Didn't know that was a thing.
301
00:12:10,813 --> 00:12:13,649
It is possible to be a scientist
and a normal guy.
302
00:12:13,732 --> 00:12:17,653
May your team be victorious!
303
00:12:19,280 --> 00:12:21,699
Not my experience.
304
00:12:26,954 --> 00:12:28,998
I brought you
some coffee.
305
00:12:29,081 --> 00:12:30,541
You don't have to keep
waiting on us.
306
00:12:30,624 --> 00:12:33,294
I'm sorry, is there a problem?
307
00:12:36,088 --> 00:12:39,008
I'm just frustrated.
308
00:12:36,088 --> 00:12:39,008
Is it Sheldon?
309
00:12:39,091 --> 00:12:42,678
It's Sheldon and Keith and
every other guy in our field,
310
00:12:42,761 --> 00:12:44,346
which is basically
everyone.
311
00:12:44,430 --> 00:12:45,681
There were only
three other women
312
00:12:45,764 --> 00:12:47,975
and one of them just dropped out
to get married.
313
00:12:48,058 --> 00:12:50,019
Good for her.
314
00:12:50,102 --> 00:12:53,147
O-Or bad, bad for science,
bad for women.
315
00:12:53,230 --> 00:12:55,733
None of the guys in my class
take me seriously,
316
00:12:55,816 --> 00:12:58,068
and honestly, it doesn't help
when women like you
317
00:12:58,152 --> 00:13:00,154
run around doing their laundry
and making them snacks.
318
00:13:00,237 --> 00:13:02,907
I'm just being
a good host.
319
00:13:02,990 --> 00:13:05,034
Yeah, and raising another boy
to think that all women
320
00:13:05,117 --> 00:13:07,411
are just notetakers
and mommies.
321
00:13:07,495 --> 00:13:11,081
I'm sorry I'm making life
so hard for you.
322
00:13:12,958 --> 00:13:15,503
And for your
information,
323
00:13:15,586 --> 00:13:17,755
Sheldon does not
look down on women,
324
00:13:17,838 --> 00:13:21,091
he looks down
on everyone.
325
00:13:26,597 --> 00:13:28,182
Friday theThirteenth Part VIII:
326
00:13:28,265 --> 00:13:30,726
Jason Takes Manhattan
might be the best one.
327
00:13:30,809 --> 00:13:35,898
Muppets also took Manhattan.
There he is again.
328
00:13:35,981 --> 00:13:37,858
Why don't you
go talk to him?
329
00:13:37,942 --> 00:13:40,903
Are you crazy?
Look how beautiful he is.
330
00:13:42,488 --> 00:13:44,698
Sorry, the only guy
I'm calling beautiful is me.
331
00:13:44,782 --> 00:13:47,243
And maybe David Hasselhoff.
332
00:13:48,994 --> 00:13:53,499
I understand that you want to be
appreciated for what you do,
333
00:13:53,582 --> 00:13:54,458
but so do I.
334
00:13:54,542 --> 00:13:57,419
This is my home
and taking care of my family
335
00:13:57,503 --> 00:14:00,130
is the choice that I've made,
and I am proud to do it.
336
00:14:00,214 --> 00:14:01,966
Okay.
337
00:14:02,049 --> 00:14:04,760
It is okay.
338
00:14:04,843 --> 00:14:08,389
And I am sorry
if me baking cookies
339
00:14:08,472 --> 00:14:09,640
says something bad
about women,
340
00:14:09,723 --> 00:14:12,476
but if you think that Sheldon
is difficult to work with now,
341
00:14:12,560 --> 00:14:14,562
you should try him
with low blood sugar,
342
00:14:14,645 --> 00:14:16,814
he is a monster.
343
00:14:17,815 --> 00:14:18,816
Someone's got to be
in charge,
344
00:14:18,899 --> 00:14:21,110
but when you step up and do it,
everyone gets upset.
345
00:14:21,193 --> 00:14:24,613
So your problem is
a woman's mad at you
346
00:14:24,697 --> 00:14:26,115
and Sheldon thinks you're dumb?
347
00:14:26,198 --> 00:14:29,076
Yeah.
348
00:14:26,198 --> 00:14:29,076
Welcome to my life, friend.
349
00:14:29,159 --> 00:14:29,952
W-What do I do?
350
00:14:30,035 --> 00:14:33,163
You-you quit complaining.
351
00:14:33,247 --> 00:14:35,040
You're young, you're smart,
352
00:14:35,124 --> 00:14:37,126
you're not
tied down.
353
00:14:37,209 --> 00:14:39,837
This is as good as it gets.
354
00:14:39,920 --> 00:14:40,921
It is?
355
00:14:41,005 --> 00:14:42,339
Yes.
356
00:14:42,423 --> 00:14:44,758
I wish I was 20 again.
357
00:14:44,842 --> 00:14:47,219
Eating and drinking
and being skinny.
358
00:14:47,303 --> 00:14:50,139
Now go back in there,
finish your project,
359
00:14:50,222 --> 00:14:52,099
and get your ass
to a keg party.
360
00:14:52,850 --> 00:14:55,019
Go!
361
00:14:55,102 --> 00:14:57,438
Somehow,my parents calmed everyone down
362
00:14:57,521 --> 00:14:59,148
and got us back on track.
363
00:14:59,231 --> 00:15:00,983
We listenedto each other's thoughts,
364
00:15:01,066 --> 00:15:03,110
and we worked as a team...
365
00:15:03,193 --> 00:15:05,154
for almost four whole minutes.
366
00:15:05,237 --> 00:15:07,156
All right, that doesn't
make any sense.
367
00:15:07,239 --> 00:15:08,157
Because you don't understand it.
368
00:15:08,240 --> 00:15:09,325
It makes total sense, Keith.
369
00:15:09,408 --> 00:15:12,286
Please, just takeyour underpants and go.
370
00:15:16,332 --> 00:15:17,666
Just say hi,
keep it casual,
371
00:15:17,750 --> 00:15:19,293
pretend like you
don't care that much.
372
00:15:19,376 --> 00:15:21,170
But I care the most.
373
00:15:21,253 --> 00:15:22,504
See, that's gonna
freak him out.
374
00:15:22,588 --> 00:15:24,798
How do you know?
375
00:15:22,588 --> 00:15:24,798
'Cause it's freaking me out.
376
00:15:24,882 --> 00:15:27,092
Now go.
377
00:15:42,066 --> 00:15:44,902
No touching!
That's right, you heard me!
378
00:15:48,572 --> 00:15:52,409
Hello?
379
00:15:52,493 --> 00:15:54,036
Hi, Connie.
380
00:15:54,119 --> 00:15:55,204
Hi, John.
381
00:15:55,287 --> 00:15:58,707
It was a nice surprise
running into you the other day.
382
00:15:58,791 --> 00:16:00,000
It was.
383
00:16:00,084 --> 00:16:01,585
Anyway, question:
384
00:16:01,669 --> 00:16:05,506
Do you think your friend June is
interested in me romantically?
385
00:16:05,589 --> 00:16:08,050
I...
386
00:16:08,133 --> 00:16:10,594
Gee, I don't know.
387
00:16:10,678 --> 00:16:12,721
I only ask because
I'm not good at knowing
388
00:16:12,805 --> 00:16:14,431
what other people are feeling.
389
00:16:14,515 --> 00:16:15,599
I'm aware.
390
00:16:15,683 --> 00:16:18,560
So could you ask her for me?
391
00:16:15,683 --> 00:16:18,560
No.
392
00:16:18,644 --> 00:16:21,230
You're right,
I should probably do it myself.
393
00:16:21,313 --> 00:16:22,523
Can I have her number?
394
00:16:22,606 --> 00:16:26,402
Well, you won over a whole bar,
395
00:16:26,485 --> 00:16:28,570
maybe you could
win over June, too.
396
00:16:33,283 --> 00:16:34,410
Hello?
397
00:16:34,493 --> 00:16:36,537
Hi, June. John Sturgis here.
398
00:16:36,620 --> 00:16:38,789
We met the other day.
399
00:16:38,872 --> 00:16:42,626
I'm, the scientist
who won over the whole bar.
400
00:16:42,710 --> 00:16:44,586
Sure, I remember you.
401
00:16:44,670 --> 00:16:47,256
Good, good. Anyway,
402
00:16:47,339 --> 00:16:50,801
I was wondering if you had
any romantic interest in me.
403
00:16:50,884 --> 00:16:53,053
Well, you don't
beat around the bush, do you?
404
00:16:53,137 --> 00:16:54,596
In medieval times,
405
00:16:54,680 --> 00:16:58,267
hunters used to hire men
to beat the area around bushes
406
00:16:58,350 --> 00:17:02,813
with sticks in order
to flush out game, so no,
407
00:17:02,896 --> 00:17:04,648
I guess I don't do that.
408
00:17:04,732 --> 00:17:06,942
John,
409
00:17:07,025 --> 00:17:09,653
you're a really sweet guy,
410
00:17:09,737 --> 00:17:11,697
but I didn't feel like
411
00:17:11,780 --> 00:17:14,575
we had that kind of connection.
412
00:17:14,658 --> 00:17:17,578
I see.
413
00:17:17,661 --> 00:17:18,996
I'm sorry.
414
00:17:19,079 --> 00:17:21,999
No, that's all right. Um...
415
00:17:22,082 --> 00:17:23,459
You know, the truth is,
416
00:17:23,542 --> 00:17:26,628
I'm-I'm still kind of
heartbroken over Connie,
417
00:17:26,712 --> 00:17:28,964
and, I was hoping if
418
00:17:29,048 --> 00:17:30,632
someone else liked me,
419
00:17:30,716 --> 00:17:33,594
it might make it hurt less.
420
00:17:33,677 --> 00:17:36,638
Well, I don't know
either one of you very well,
421
00:17:36,722 --> 00:17:39,308
but I wouldn't write off
Connie just yet.
422
00:17:39,391 --> 00:17:42,478
Why? Did she say something?
423
00:17:42,561 --> 00:17:45,814
No, but, it's just the way
she looked at you.
424
00:17:45,898 --> 00:17:48,317
See? That's what
I'm terrible at.
425
00:17:48,400 --> 00:17:50,235
How do you people do it?
426
00:17:50,319 --> 00:17:53,155
Look, I know she's
with Dale right now,
427
00:17:53,238 --> 00:17:55,157
but we were married
for a long time.
428
00:17:55,240 --> 00:17:57,868
Trust me,
he's gonna screw this up.
429
00:17:57,951 --> 00:18:01,955
Follow up question: Should I
mention any of this to Connie?
430
00:18:02,039 --> 00:18:04,041
I wouldn't.
431
00:18:04,124 --> 00:18:06,877
Excellent. Bye.
432
00:18:10,255 --> 00:18:12,174
Captioning sponsored by
CBS
433
00:18:12,257 --> 00:18:14,176
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434
00:18:14,259 --> 00:18:16,303
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