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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,419 --> 00:00:04,376 (SAWING AND HAMMERING) 2 00:00:06,423 --> 00:00:09,666 There she is, Mabel! The cheapest fair money can rent! 3 00:00:09,843 --> 00:00:11,709 I spared every expense. 4 00:00:12,095 --> 00:00:14,052 -(ROPE SNAPPING) -DIPPER: Ahhh! 5 00:00:15,182 --> 00:00:18,891 I think the sky tram is broken. Also, most of my bones. 6 00:00:19,269 --> 00:00:23,263 (LAUGHS) This guy. All right, all right, I got a job for you two. 7 00:00:23,440 --> 00:00:26,228 I printed up a bunch of fake safety inspection certificates. 8 00:00:26,401 --> 00:00:28,563 Go slap one on anything that looks like a lawsuit. 9 00:00:28,904 --> 00:00:30,611 Grunkle Stan, is that legal? 10 00:00:30,822 --> 00:00:33,189 When there's no cops around, anything's legal. 11 00:00:33,408 --> 00:00:35,490 Soos, how's that dunk tank coming along? 12 00:00:37,079 --> 00:00:38,990 Almost ready to go, Mr. Pines! 13 00:00:40,374 --> 00:00:41,455 (RATTLING) 14 00:00:41,750 --> 00:00:44,458 Ha! You got it rigged from here to Timbuktu! 15 00:00:44,753 --> 00:00:47,120 There's nothing on earth that could knock me down. 16 00:00:47,339 --> 00:00:50,297 Yeah, except for, like, a futuristic laser arm cannon. 17 00:00:50,676 --> 00:00:53,464 (SCOFFS) Hey, you haven't seen my red screwdriver, have you? 18 00:00:53,679 --> 00:00:54,840 Darn thing went missing. 19 00:00:55,055 --> 00:00:57,547 Maybe some magical creature or paranormal thingum took it. 20 00:00:57,724 --> 00:01:00,512 Oye, you've been spending too much time with those kids! 21 00:01:00,727 --> 00:01:03,264 All right, let's see, where did I put that thing? 22 00:01:04,314 --> 00:01:05,270 (DEVICE BEEPS) 23 00:01:05,440 --> 00:01:08,228 The mission is proceeding as planned. Over. 24 00:01:12,990 --> 00:01:14,947 (THEME MUSIC PLAYING) 25 00:01:53,030 --> 00:01:56,022 STAN: (ON MEGAPHONE) It's 12:00. The Dunk Tank is now open! 26 00:01:56,199 --> 00:01:57,485 -(FEEDBACK) -(ALL GROAN) 27 00:01:57,868 --> 00:02:01,077 Step right up and dunk me, folks! I'm talking to you, cut-offs! 28 00:02:01,288 --> 00:02:04,622 That's right, muffin-top, high pants. Who wants a piece of me? 29 00:02:06,043 --> 00:02:07,249 (LAUGHING) 30 00:02:07,461 --> 00:02:09,168 Come back any time, folks. 31 00:02:11,298 --> 00:02:14,416 How do they get them into this shape? It's unnatural! 32 00:02:14,635 --> 00:02:17,548 But Dipper, they're so delicious? 33 00:02:17,971 --> 00:02:19,006 (BOTH CHUCKLING) 34 00:02:19,973 --> 00:02:21,964 Oh, boo! I'll be right back. 35 00:02:22,184 --> 00:02:23,720 I'll be right here! Heh. 36 00:02:24,478 --> 00:02:25,388 (WHISPERS) I love you. 37 00:02:25,562 --> 00:02:29,055 Look at you two! Getting all romantic at the fair! 38 00:02:29,274 --> 00:02:31,185 Come on, it's no big deal. 39 00:02:31,360 --> 00:02:32,270 Yeah, it is! 40 00:02:32,486 --> 00:02:35,569 Okay, you're right. It is! Isn't this amazing? I just dove in! I said, 41 00:02:35,781 --> 00:02:38,819 "Hey, you wanna hang out at the fair?" And you know what she said? 42 00:02:39,534 --> 00:02:41,024 Yeah, I guess so. 43 00:02:41,203 --> 00:02:43,240 "Yeah, I guess so!" It totally worked! 44 00:02:43,455 --> 00:02:46,538 All your advice about just going for it, it's finally paying off! 45 00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:50,834 When are you going to learn, Dipper? I'm always right about everything! 46 00:02:51,338 --> 00:02:54,205 Hey, do you smell a gallon of body spray? 47 00:02:55,425 --> 00:02:57,587 Hey, either of you dorks seen Wendy around? 48 00:02:57,928 --> 00:02:59,794 -Who wants to know? -Hey! 49 00:03:00,013 --> 00:03:02,004 Yeah, I got some new super-tight jeans. 50 00:03:02,224 --> 00:03:04,511 Thought she might want to check them out. 51 00:03:04,976 --> 00:03:07,217 Yeah, you know, I think I saw her in the bottomless pit. 52 00:03:07,437 --> 00:03:08,848 You should really go jump in there. 53 00:03:09,272 --> 00:03:11,104 Maybe I will, smart guy. 54 00:03:11,566 --> 00:03:12,556 (GROANS) 55 00:03:12,776 --> 00:03:13,982 He is such a jerk! 56 00:03:14,403 --> 00:03:16,235 Yeah. But he's a jerk with tight pants and a guitar. 57 00:03:16,405 --> 00:03:18,191 I need to keep him away from Wendy at all costs. 58 00:03:18,407 --> 00:03:21,024 Don't worry, brother, whatever happens, I'll be right here, 59 00:03:21,201 --> 00:03:24,034 supporting you every step of the... Oh, my gosh! A pig! 60 00:03:26,331 --> 00:03:28,038 (MABEL PANTING) 61 00:03:28,417 --> 00:03:29,498 If fen you can guess the critter's weight, 62 00:03:29,710 --> 00:03:31,496 you can take the critter home. 63 00:03:36,341 --> 00:03:37,706 '(0INKS) -(GASPS) 64 00:03:37,926 --> 00:03:40,338 He said "Mabel"! Either that or "doorbell". 65 00:03:40,554 --> 00:03:43,387 -Did you say "Mabel" or "doorbell"? -(OINKS) 66 00:03:44,850 --> 00:03:47,558 Oh, look, Mabel here found her real twin. 67 00:03:47,894 --> 00:03:49,305 (GIRLS LAUGHING) 68 00:03:49,896 --> 00:03:51,227 Pacifica. 69 00:03:51,440 --> 00:03:53,056 Sir, I must have that pig! 70 00:03:53,567 --> 00:03:55,729 Ah! Old Fifteen-Pound y. 71 00:03:55,944 --> 00:03:57,275 So, how much you guessing he weighs? 72 00:03:58,071 --> 00:04:00,187 Um, 15 pounds? 73 00:04:00,615 --> 00:04:03,824 Are you some kind of witch? Well, here's your pig. 74 00:04:04,494 --> 00:04:05,359 (SNORTING) 75 00:04:08,540 --> 00:04:09,996 And you'll be needing these. 76 00:04:10,792 --> 00:04:12,374 No? Suit yourself. 77 00:04:14,463 --> 00:04:16,579 (WHISPERS) Everything is different now. 78 00:04:17,424 --> 00:04:18,630 Whoa, check it out. 79 00:04:19,593 --> 00:04:22,381 I don't know if it's a duck or a panda, but I want one! 80 00:04:23,638 --> 00:04:25,345 My uncle taught me the secret to these games. 81 00:04:25,557 --> 00:04:28,424 You aim for the carny's head, and take the prize when he's unconscious. 82 00:04:28,685 --> 00:04:30,551 (CHUCKLES) Nice. 83 00:04:30,771 --> 00:04:33,433 -One ball, please. -CARNY: You only get one chance. 84 00:04:35,484 --> 00:04:37,942 And a-one! And a-two! And a... (GRUNTS) 85 00:04:39,446 --> 00:04:40,527 Ow! My eye! 86 00:04:40,989 --> 00:04:42,821 Oh, my gosh! Oh, my gosh! Wendy, are you okay? 87 00:04:43,158 --> 00:04:44,444 Does it look swollen? 88 00:04:45,994 --> 00:04:49,328 Everything's gonna be fine! Don't worry! I'll... I'll go get some ice! 89 00:04:54,461 --> 00:04:55,701 Where is she, where is she? 90 00:04:56,296 --> 00:04:57,331 (GRUNTS) 91 00:05:00,008 --> 00:05:01,669 Hey! Watch where you're going, man! 92 00:05:02,302 --> 00:05:03,417 (PANTING) 93 00:05:04,513 --> 00:05:05,503 (GRUNTS) 94 00:05:05,680 --> 00:05:08,593 ROBBIE: All right, just ease your eyeball into that Freezy-cone. 95 00:05:08,809 --> 00:05:11,392 (SIGHS) Robbie, thanks. That's really sweet. 96 00:05:11,561 --> 00:05:13,393 The gesture and the flavored syrup. 97 00:05:13,563 --> 00:05:16,897 Yeah, I was just here in the right place at the right time. 98 00:05:17,359 --> 00:05:19,020 You know, I've been meaning to ask you, 99 00:05:19,236 --> 00:05:20,977 we've been spending a lot of time together 100 00:05:21,196 --> 00:05:24,279 and I was wondering if maybe, you wanted to go out with me? 101 00:05:24,491 --> 00:05:25,447 (WHIMPERS) 102 00:05:26,243 --> 00:05:27,529 Yeah, I guess so. 103 00:05:27,786 --> 00:05:28,821 Sweet! 104 00:05:31,623 --> 00:05:35,116 Look, Dipper! I won my pet pig! His name is Waddles. 105 00:05:35,335 --> 00:05:38,953 I called him that because he waddles. Waddles! 106 00:05:39,381 --> 00:05:40,746 Everything is different now. 107 00:05:41,132 --> 00:05:42,372 What are you looking at? 108 00:05:50,058 --> 00:05:51,139 Oh. 109 00:06:01,319 --> 00:06:03,060 MAN: Uh... Are you gonna move? 110 00:06:03,446 --> 00:06:04,436 (MOANS) 111 00:06:04,781 --> 00:06:05,737 (SIGHS) 112 00:06:05,991 --> 00:06:07,106 MABEL: Paging Dr. Waddles! 113 00:06:07,325 --> 00:06:09,487 We got a boy here with a broken heart. (CHUCKLES) 114 00:06:09,703 --> 00:06:11,410 Come on, man! These are the jokes! 115 00:06:11,621 --> 00:06:14,989 Mabel, do you ever wish you could go back and undo just one mistake? 116 00:06:15,208 --> 00:06:17,791 Nope! I do everything right all the time. 117 00:06:18,128 --> 00:06:19,459 (MIMICKING OINKING) 118 00:06:19,671 --> 00:06:21,958 Wendy only went out with Robbie because he was there with the ice, 119 00:06:22,173 --> 00:06:23,538 and she only needed ice because of the baseball, 120 00:06:23,758 --> 00:06:25,590 and I would have had the ice if it wasn't for 121 00:06:25,760 --> 00:06:27,250 (GASPS) that guy! 122 00:06:27,554 --> 00:06:30,171 Hey, you! Tool belt! You ruined my life! 123 00:06:30,390 --> 00:06:32,381 -Huh? -Don't "huh" me! I've seen you before! 124 00:06:32,559 --> 00:06:34,345 What's your deal? Are you following us around? 125 00:06:34,561 --> 00:06:36,768 And why are you bald? What's all that about? 126 00:06:36,980 --> 00:06:39,221 (YELPS) My position has been compromised! 127 00:06:39,399 --> 00:06:40,855 Assuming stealth mode! 128 00:06:41,985 --> 00:06:45,774 Color match. Initiating color match. Come on! Dang it! 129 00:06:46,781 --> 00:06:47,942 (SCREWDRIVER SQUEAKING) 130 00:06:48,199 --> 00:06:49,405 That's amazing! 131 00:06:49,618 --> 00:06:51,825 (GASPS) Are you from the future or something? 132 00:06:52,037 --> 00:06:55,405 Uh... No! Who told you that? Memory Wipe! 133 00:06:56,958 --> 00:06:58,448 This is a baby wipe. 134 00:06:59,419 --> 00:07:01,660 (GROANS) All right, you've cornered me. 135 00:07:01,880 --> 00:07:04,417 I'm a time traveler. 136 00:07:04,966 --> 00:07:06,456 So wait a minute, if you're from the future, 137 00:07:06,676 --> 00:07:08,508 do you have, like, a time machine or something? 138 00:07:08,762 --> 00:07:10,924 That's kind of how it works. 139 00:07:13,934 --> 00:07:15,095 Could I borrow it? 140 00:07:16,895 --> 00:07:19,387 DIPPER: Come on, can I use your time machine just once? 141 00:07:19,564 --> 00:07:21,896 Out of the question! You know, this is sensitive, 142 00:07:22,108 --> 00:07:24,190 extremely complicated time equipment. 143 00:07:24,861 --> 00:07:26,022 It looks like a tape measure. 144 00:07:26,237 --> 00:07:28,399 You shut your time-mouth! 145 00:07:29,074 --> 00:07:30,280 This making any sense to you? 146 00:07:30,533 --> 00:07:32,240 (WHISPERS) I think he's just crazy! 147 00:07:32,452 --> 00:07:33,487 Oh, you don't believe me? 148 00:07:36,247 --> 00:07:37,578 Guess where I was! 149 00:07:37,791 --> 00:07:38,781 BOTH: Whoa! 150 00:07:38,959 --> 00:07:42,452 That's right! Fifteen years ago there was a costume store right here! 151 00:07:42,671 --> 00:07:45,129 One second. 152 00:07:45,340 --> 00:07:47,581 Oh, heck! Pat, pat down! 153 00:07:47,759 --> 00:07:48,874 So, who are you again? 154 00:07:49,094 --> 00:07:52,052 Blendin Blandin. Time Anomaly Removal Crew, 155 00:07:52,263 --> 00:07:54,550 Year Twenty Sfieventy Twelve. 156 00:07:54,766 --> 00:07:57,053 My mission is to stop a series of time anomalies 157 00:07:57,268 --> 00:07:59,430 that are supposed to happen at this very location. 158 00:07:59,604 --> 00:08:03,893 But I don't see any anomalies. I don't know if it's some kind of paradox 159 00:08:04,317 --> 00:08:06,149 or if I'm just really tired. 160 00:08:07,237 --> 00:08:09,103 You know, you sound like you could use a break. 161 00:08:09,280 --> 00:08:10,566 Definitely. Definitely. 162 00:08:10,782 --> 00:08:14,116 Might we recommend one of the various attractions at the Mystery Fair? 163 00:08:14,661 --> 00:08:19,781 You know what? What the heck! I'm worth it! But I got my eye on you! 164 00:08:20,458 --> 00:08:22,324 (BLENDIN WHIMPERING) 165 00:08:24,004 --> 00:08:24,994 One, please! 166 00:08:25,213 --> 00:08:27,921 Sorry, dude, but you're gonna have to take your belt off for the ride. 167 00:08:28,133 --> 00:08:30,795 One of your tools might fly off and accidentally fix something. 168 00:08:31,469 --> 00:08:33,380 Guard it with your life. 169 00:08:33,680 --> 00:08:35,512 I will watch it like a hawk, dude. 170 00:08:37,475 --> 00:08:39,762 (CHEERING) 171 00:08:41,438 --> 00:08:42,428 Like a hawk. 172 00:08:44,065 --> 00:08:48,400 Here it is, Mabel. Our ticket to any moment in history! 173 00:08:48,611 --> 00:08:51,023 Let's go get two dodos and force them to make out! 174 00:08:51,322 --> 00:08:53,279 No! We gotta be smart about this. 175 00:08:53,491 --> 00:08:55,858 All that paradox talk kind of freaked me out. 176 00:08:56,077 --> 00:08:58,489 All I'm going to do is go back and fix my one mistake. 177 00:08:58,705 --> 00:09:01,367 If I don't miss that baseball throw, I won't hit Wendy in the eye, 178 00:09:01,624 --> 00:09:04,082 and Robbie won't comfort her, and they won't start going out. 179 00:09:04,544 --> 00:09:07,787 I'm coming, too! I want to relive the greatest moment of my life, 180 00:09:08,423 --> 00:09:09,754 winning Waddles! 181 00:09:10,508 --> 00:09:11,873 -Muah! -(SNORTS) 182 00:09:16,097 --> 00:09:17,178 See you later. 183 00:09:17,390 --> 00:09:20,257 See you earlier! (LAUGHS) 184 00:09:21,019 --> 00:09:22,009 (BEEPS) 185 00:09:23,730 --> 00:09:25,437 (SQUEALING) 186 00:09:44,876 --> 00:09:46,207 (EXCLAIMING IN SHOCK) 187 00:09:47,670 --> 00:09:48,751 (BOTH PANTING) 188 00:09:51,716 --> 00:09:54,799 STAN: (ON MEGAPHONE) It's 12:00. The Dunk Tank is now open! 189 00:09:55,303 --> 00:09:56,634 -(FEEDBACK) -(ALL GROAN) 190 00:09:57,305 --> 00:10:00,673 Step right up and dunk me, folks! I'm talking to you, cut-offs! 191 00:10:01,142 --> 00:10:03,509 -Do-over? -Do-over! 192 00:10:03,728 --> 00:10:04,593 If and you could guess the... 193 00:10:04,813 --> 00:10:06,144 Fifteen pounds! 194 00:10:06,856 --> 00:10:08,847 And yes, I am a witch. 195 00:10:09,609 --> 00:10:11,600 Well, time to round up a mob. 196 00:10:12,821 --> 00:10:13,686 Hey, Wendy. 197 00:10:13,905 --> 00:10:15,737 There you are. Hey, what happened to your hat? 198 00:10:16,282 --> 00:10:18,068 Uh... Nothing. Hey, look! What's that? 199 00:10:18,284 --> 00:10:22,073 Whoa! Check it out. I don't know if it's a duck or a panda but I want one. 200 00:10:22,747 --> 00:10:23,737 One ball, please. 201 00:10:23,957 --> 00:10:25,573 CARNY: You only get one chance. 202 00:10:25,792 --> 00:10:26,907 That's what you think. 203 00:10:28,628 --> 00:10:30,585 One panda-duck, coming right up! 204 00:10:30,797 --> 00:10:32,913 Okay, Dipper, second chance. Don't mess this up. 205 00:10:33,466 --> 00:10:34,547 (GRUNTS) 206 00:10:34,759 --> 00:10:36,090 Yes! 207 00:10:36,970 --> 00:10:39,337 -Ow! My eye! -What? 208 00:10:39,848 --> 00:10:41,213 Does it look swollen? 209 00:10:42,058 --> 00:10:43,093 That's so weird. 210 00:10:43,309 --> 00:10:44,595 WENDY: Oh, hey, Robbie! 211 00:10:44,936 --> 00:10:48,179 So anyway, we've been hanging out a lot, and I've been wondering if, 212 00:10:48,398 --> 00:10:49,854 you wanted to go out with me? 213 00:10:50,441 --> 00:10:51,556 Yeah, I guess so. 214 00:10:51,860 --> 00:10:52,816 Sweet! 215 00:10:57,448 --> 00:11:00,486 The exact same thing happened twice! It was spooky! 216 00:11:00,827 --> 00:11:05,446 Ooh, maybe it's a time curse! Waddles, can you say "time curse"? 217 00:11:05,915 --> 00:11:07,497 -(OINKING) -(SQUEALS) 218 00:11:08,168 --> 00:11:10,284 Your face is so fat! 219 00:11:10,795 --> 00:11:12,536 Is it possible that the forces of time 220 00:11:12,755 --> 00:11:15,668 naturally conspire to undo any new outcomes? 221 00:11:15,842 --> 00:11:18,800 No, no. I just need to try again. Third time's the charm. 222 00:11:19,012 --> 00:11:20,343 How hard can it be? 223 00:11:22,807 --> 00:11:23,717 Light her on fire! 224 00:11:23,933 --> 00:11:25,048 -(INDISTINCT CLAMORING) -Find the witch! 225 00:11:32,984 --> 00:11:34,065 Ow! My eye! 226 00:11:34,485 --> 00:11:35,771 Hey, you all right? 227 00:11:35,987 --> 00:11:36,897 (MABEL LAUGHS) 228 00:11:37,113 --> 00:11:38,478 (CAMERA CLICKING) 229 00:11:48,791 --> 00:11:50,828 -(GROANS) -Ow! My eye! 230 00:11:51,211 --> 00:11:52,372 Oh, bad luck. 231 00:11:57,717 --> 00:12:01,631 Uh... Wendy, how badly do you want that stuffed animal thing? 232 00:12:01,846 --> 00:12:04,679 More than anything in the world, Dipper. 233 00:12:04,891 --> 00:12:06,097 (SIGHING) Okay. 234 00:12:07,560 --> 00:12:08,550 (GRUNTS) 235 00:12:09,854 --> 00:12:11,595 (GROANING) 236 00:12:15,026 --> 00:12:16,687 I love my pig! 237 00:12:18,696 --> 00:12:21,779 If I adjust the ball for wind speed, factoring cotton candy... 238 00:12:22,075 --> 00:12:25,568 Face it, Dipper, you're obviously fated to have a bad day at the fair. 239 00:12:25,787 --> 00:12:27,824 Just like I'm fated to be with Waddles! 240 00:12:28,414 --> 00:12:29,950 It's like there's one variable missing. 241 00:12:30,166 --> 00:12:31,247 What's a variable? 242 00:12:32,293 --> 00:12:35,786 Ha! That's it! I figured out a way to win the toss, not hit Wendy, 243 00:12:35,964 --> 00:12:37,921 and stop Wendy and Robbie from going out. 244 00:12:38,132 --> 00:12:40,214 Awesome! I'm gonna go win my pig again! 245 00:12:40,426 --> 00:12:42,758 Whoa, whoa, whoa! You can't leave. I need you for my plan. 246 00:12:42,971 --> 00:12:44,177 But what about Waddles? 247 00:12:44,389 --> 00:12:46,346 -It'll just take a few minutes! Let's go! -Whoa! 248 00:12:51,062 --> 00:12:52,803 (wmo BLOWING) 249 00:12:53,189 --> 00:12:54,520 You gonna go, man? 250 00:12:55,650 --> 00:12:57,061 And a-one, and a-two and a... 251 00:12:57,986 --> 00:12:59,317 Aw, dude, you missed. 252 00:12:59,862 --> 00:13:01,023 Did I? 253 00:13:08,079 --> 00:13:09,114 (ALL GASP) 254 00:13:09,998 --> 00:13:10,954 (ALL GROAN) 255 00:13:11,165 --> 00:13:12,200 Hah! 256 00:13:14,711 --> 00:13:15,701 Huh? 257 00:13:18,047 --> 00:13:20,755 Your stuffed creature of indeterminate species, miss. 258 00:13:20,925 --> 00:13:22,836 -(SQUEAKING) -Oh! Awesome! 259 00:13:24,554 --> 00:13:26,261 -There you are, Wendy. -Hi, Robbie! 260 00:13:26,514 --> 00:13:28,004 So I was wondering if, you... 261 00:13:28,224 --> 00:13:29,510 Look what Dipper got for me! 262 00:13:31,185 --> 00:13:36,021 (SCOFFING) Whatever. Can't even tell what species it is. Stupid. 263 00:13:36,941 --> 00:13:40,229 What's his deal? (SCOFFS) Looks like I came to the fair with the right guy! 264 00:13:41,195 --> 00:13:43,436 -(BELL DINGS) -MAN: We have a winner! 265 00:13:45,908 --> 00:13:49,367 Anytime, broseph. Now, to win my pig. 266 00:13:49,912 --> 00:13:50,868 (GASPING) 267 00:13:51,122 --> 00:13:56,208 It's all yours! No one else's! Old Fifteen-Pound y! Yours! Forever! 268 00:13:58,963 --> 00:14:00,328 (WADDLES SQUEALING) 269 00:14:00,882 --> 00:14:02,088 (SCREAMING) 270 00:14:03,926 --> 00:14:04,882 (BOTH LAUGHING) 271 00:14:05,094 --> 00:14:07,381 That was even more awesome the third time around! 272 00:14:07,722 --> 00:14:09,759 (GASPS) Funnel cake! Let's go get some, Dipper. 273 00:14:09,974 --> 00:14:11,510 (MABEL SCREAMING) 274 00:14:15,855 --> 00:14:17,391 -(IN DISTINCT) -Ahhh! 275 00:14:17,815 --> 00:14:19,647 -Mabel, what... -(SCREAMING) 276 00:14:20,360 --> 00:14:22,021 -I'll just wait until you're done. -I'm done. 277 00:14:22,236 --> 00:14:23,476 Okay, what is wrong? 278 00:14:23,821 --> 00:14:25,186 We messed up the timeline! 279 00:14:25,365 --> 00:14:28,403 Pacifica saw the flyer and won Waddles before I did! 280 00:14:28,618 --> 00:14:30,279 She took Waddles, Dipper! 281 00:14:30,661 --> 00:14:32,368 Oh, Mabel, I'm sorry! 282 00:14:32,580 --> 00:14:34,947 (SIGHS) It's okay, we just need to go back 283 00:14:35,124 --> 00:14:36,410 -and do things differently. -(GASPS) Mabel! 284 00:14:36,626 --> 00:14:39,288 Wait! Look, I did the math, in any other timeline, 285 00:14:39,504 --> 00:14:41,871 Wendy ends up going out with Robbie! I can't mess this day up again! 286 00:14:42,090 --> 00:14:44,878 But if we don't go, then I'll lose Waddles forever! 287 00:14:45,093 --> 00:14:46,800 -Hey! -(BOTH GRUNTING) 288 00:14:47,011 --> 00:14:48,001 Give it back! 289 00:14:48,221 --> 00:14:49,177 DIPPER: Whoa! 290 00:14:53,476 --> 00:14:54,637 (BOTH GRUNT) 291 00:14:55,103 --> 00:14:56,685 When are we? 292 00:14:57,021 --> 00:15:01,310 The real question is, "When are we?" Oh, wait, did you already... 293 00:15:01,484 --> 00:15:02,474 -Yeah, I... I already... -'Cause I was gonna... 294 00:15:02,693 --> 00:15:04,149 -Yeah, it's the same thing. -All right. 295 00:15:04,320 --> 00:15:06,106 -Do you hear that? -(RUMBLING) 296 00:15:11,119 --> 00:15:12,075 (BOTH SCREAM) 297 00:15:14,997 --> 00:15:16,453 (BOTH SCREAMING) 298 00:15:17,667 --> 00:15:19,078 (BOTH PANTING) 299 00:15:21,504 --> 00:15:22,790 (BOTH SCREAMING) 300 00:15:29,053 --> 00:15:31,511 Be on the lookout for mountain lions, travelers! 301 00:15:32,056 --> 00:15:34,969 Dysentery? Who wants dysentery? 302 00:15:35,476 --> 00:15:36,887 Forge ahead, mighty oxen! 303 00:15:37,103 --> 00:15:40,266 For a new life awaits us on this Oregon Trail! 304 00:15:40,898 --> 00:15:42,935 Where are we? The '70s? 305 00:15:43,151 --> 00:15:45,267 You sent us back 150 years, genius! 306 00:15:45,445 --> 00:15:46,560 It's pioneer times! 307 00:15:46,904 --> 00:15:51,239 By Trembly! Fertilia! It seems you've given birth to two more children! 308 00:15:51,868 --> 00:15:55,907 It appears I have! More little hands to render the tallow. 309 00:15:56,122 --> 00:15:58,033 (CHUCKLES) Tallow? What? 310 00:15:58,249 --> 00:16:00,240 Her mouth is filled with silver, mother! 311 00:16:00,460 --> 00:16:01,791 These are called braces! 312 00:16:01,961 --> 00:16:03,918 Mabel, we can't start messing with the past! 313 00:16:04,130 --> 00:16:06,087 Oh, says the guy who messed with the past all day, 314 00:16:06,299 --> 00:16:09,132 and cost me my pig? I'll mess with whatever I want! 315 00:16:09,343 --> 00:16:13,177 Check it out! A magic button machine! Shoes that blink! 316 00:16:15,099 --> 00:16:16,430 ALL: Ohhh! 317 00:16:18,394 --> 00:16:24,106 Hey, sister, guess who gets to vote in the future? Ladies! Up top! 318 00:16:24,358 --> 00:16:27,020 That's called a high-five. Teach it to your friends. 319 00:16:27,945 --> 00:16:29,686 Give me that! I'm gonna set the timeline right! 320 00:16:29,906 --> 00:16:31,692 Hey! No! 321 00:16:34,118 --> 00:16:35,608 -(ROARING) -BOTH: Ahhh! 322 00:16:38,915 --> 00:16:39,996 Phew! (YELPS) 323 00:16:40,500 --> 00:16:42,161 Run, run! Take cover! 324 00:16:42,376 --> 00:16:43,741 It's coming! 325 00:16:45,087 --> 00:16:46,293 (CACKLING) 326 00:16:48,174 --> 00:16:49,585 This future seems neat. 327 00:16:53,721 --> 00:16:55,086 I'm coming, Waddles! 328 00:16:55,306 --> 00:16:56,296 Hey! 329 00:16:56,557 --> 00:16:58,673 I seen it! I seen it again! 330 00:16:59,227 --> 00:17:02,720 But enough about me. Behold... Me! 331 00:17:02,980 --> 00:17:04,641 (PANTING) 332 00:17:05,983 --> 00:17:07,098 (ROARING) 333 00:17:10,112 --> 00:17:12,103 This thing is getting hotter! 334 00:17:12,281 --> 00:17:13,567 Hot! Hot, hot, hot! 335 00:17:13,950 --> 00:17:15,941 -What did you do? -I don't know! 336 00:17:16,702 --> 00:17:18,067 (BOTH SCREAMING) 337 00:17:26,045 --> 00:17:27,160 MABEL: Where are we? 338 00:17:27,380 --> 00:17:29,337 DIPPER: It's nothing but inky blackness for miles! 339 00:17:29,549 --> 00:17:33,383 Mabel, don't you see? We've transported to the end of time! 340 00:17:33,803 --> 00:17:35,544 -MABEL: Whoa! -(DIPPER SCREAMING) 341 00:17:39,016 --> 00:17:41,178 Wait, why does it smell so bad in here? 342 00:17:41,686 --> 00:17:42,926 (KNOCKING ON METAL) 343 00:17:45,064 --> 00:17:46,475 (BOTH PANTING) 344 00:17:47,441 --> 00:17:48,931 Look! We're back in the present! 345 00:17:49,151 --> 00:17:50,232 But which present? 346 00:17:51,153 --> 00:17:53,064 The is the best present ever! 347 00:17:53,239 --> 00:17:54,229 Yes! 348 00:17:54,615 --> 00:17:56,026 (SQUEALING) 349 00:17:56,200 --> 00:17:57,110 [[511 350 00:17:57,618 --> 00:18:00,201 Give me that thing! Dipper, give it back! 351 00:18:02,248 --> 00:18:03,909 Look, Mabel, it's over, okay? 352 00:18:04,083 --> 00:18:06,165 Give it up! I've worked too hard to lose this. 353 00:18:06,377 --> 00:18:09,244 But what about Waddles? He was my soul mate! 354 00:18:09,672 --> 00:18:11,959 You said that about a ball of yarn once! 355 00:18:12,174 --> 00:18:14,256 Do you really want Wendy to date Robbie? 356 00:18:14,844 --> 00:18:16,005 I don't know. 357 00:18:23,185 --> 00:18:25,847 You're not guilt-tripping me, Mabel. Not this time. 358 00:18:29,609 --> 00:18:30,770 Come on, Mabel. I know you. 359 00:18:31,027 --> 00:18:32,938 You're gonna forget about this in a day. 360 00:18:33,863 --> 00:18:35,570 Here, hey, I'll prove it. 361 00:18:38,993 --> 00:18:40,154 -See? -(THUDDING) 362 00:18:44,415 --> 00:18:47,077 Okay, maybe you'll forget in a week. 363 00:18:51,672 --> 00:18:53,037 A month. She'll be better in a month! 364 00:18:58,220 --> 00:19:00,962 Waddles. Waddles. 365 00:19:01,182 --> 00:19:03,173 And if you look to your left, you'll see Miserable Mabel. 366 00:19:03,392 --> 00:19:04,132 -(CAMERAS CLICKING) -The girl who went bonkers 367 00:19:04,352 --> 00:19:06,559 after her dreams were shattered by some heartless jerk. 368 00:19:06,771 --> 00:19:07,932 Oh, hey, dipper-. 369 00:19:11,359 --> 00:19:12,520 (GROANS) 370 00:19:13,235 --> 00:19:14,396 (SIGHING) 371 00:19:19,283 --> 00:19:21,991 I don't know if it's a duck or a panda, but I want one. 372 00:19:23,329 --> 00:19:24,194 (SIGHING) 373 00:19:24,413 --> 00:19:26,370 Wendy, I just wanted to say that... 374 00:19:26,582 --> 00:19:28,789 Well, I just wanted to say that people make mistakes, 375 00:19:29,126 --> 00:19:31,242 and when they do, you should forgive them. 376 00:19:31,462 --> 00:19:33,123 And also, that tight pants are over-rated. 377 00:19:33,339 --> 00:19:34,454 Dude, you lost me. 378 00:19:35,341 --> 00:19:37,298 I know. One ball, please. 379 00:19:37,510 --> 00:19:38,875 CARNY: You only get one chance. 380 00:19:41,305 --> 00:19:43,171 And a-one, and a-two, and a... 381 00:19:44,266 --> 00:19:45,347 Ow! My eye! 382 00:19:46,310 --> 00:19:47,800 -Hey, Wendy? Are you okay? -(GROANING) 383 00:19:48,145 --> 00:19:51,137 You know, this is the perfect time for me to, ask you something. 384 00:19:51,399 --> 00:19:53,265 -It is done. -(MABEL GRUNTS) 385 00:19:53,442 --> 00:19:56,025 Dipper! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! 386 00:19:57,279 --> 00:19:58,235 (OINKING) 387 00:19:58,447 --> 00:20:01,235 He's saying "Thank You" in Pig! Aren't you, Waddles? 388 00:20:01,450 --> 00:20:02,611 (OINKING) 389 00:20:03,494 --> 00:20:05,235 -Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! -(CLUCKING) 390 00:20:05,830 --> 00:20:07,241 I couldn't break your heart, Mabel. 391 00:20:07,456 --> 00:20:10,414 Besides, there's no way Wendy can date Robbie all summer, right? 392 00:20:11,293 --> 00:20:13,000 -You two! -(BOTH GASP) 393 00:20:13,379 --> 00:20:14,369 (SQUEALING) 394 00:20:14,588 --> 00:20:18,252 Do you have any idea how many rules you just broke? 395 00:20:18,467 --> 00:20:22,256 I'm asking, I wasn't there with you. It was probably a lot, right? 396 00:20:22,972 --> 00:20:24,383 Blendin Blandin. 397 00:20:24,598 --> 00:20:27,932 (YELPS) The Time Paradox Avoidance Enforcement Squadron! 398 00:20:28,477 --> 00:20:30,889 That's right. And our phones have been ringing off the hook. 399 00:20:31,105 --> 00:20:33,312 There's settlers high-fiving in the 1800s. 400 00:20:33,482 --> 00:20:35,564 And calculators littered through eight centuries! 401 00:20:36,235 --> 00:20:39,273 You are under arrest for violations of the time travelers' code of conduct. 402 00:20:39,613 --> 00:20:42,230 (STUTTERS) It was those kids! And their leader, Waddles! 403 00:20:42,450 --> 00:20:43,611 That's a pig, Blendin. 404 00:20:43,826 --> 00:20:45,191 I'll get you for this! 405 00:20:45,411 --> 00:20:48,824 I'll go back in time and make sure your parents never meet! 406 00:20:49,623 --> 00:20:50,613 Well, we're still here. 407 00:20:50,833 --> 00:20:52,494 Guess he forgot to go back. 408 00:20:52,793 --> 00:20:54,375 Ha! You suckers! 409 00:20:54,587 --> 00:20:57,204 Your pockets are empty and I'm still sitting high and dry! 410 00:20:57,548 --> 00:20:58,879 (ALL JEERING) 411 00:20:59,258 --> 00:21:00,293 (LAUGHING) 412 00:21:00,509 --> 00:21:02,295 Yeah. "Boo. Boo." I love it. 413 00:21:02,511 --> 00:21:05,424 Hey, biceps! Yeah, I'm talking to you, haircut. 414 00:21:06,515 --> 00:21:08,472 Take your best shot. Ha! 415 00:21:11,061 --> 00:21:12,426 (SCREAMS) 416 00:21:12,730 --> 00:21:13,765 (ALL CHEERING) 417 00:21:14,231 --> 00:21:15,221 (GURGLING) 418 00:21:19,862 --> 00:21:22,069 So, I guess we never found out who was causing 419 00:21:22,239 --> 00:21:24,401 those time anomalies Blendin was looking for. 420 00:21:24,617 --> 00:21:27,029 Wait, Mabel, I think it was us! 421 00:21:27,369 --> 00:21:29,406 Ugh! My brain hurts. 422 00:21:29,747 --> 00:21:32,239 Aw, jeez, I've gotta deal with this all summer. 423 00:21:33,417 --> 00:21:35,374 (CHUCKLES) It's good. It's caramel. 424 00:21:35,586 --> 00:21:36,451 I'm on it. 425 00:21:37,046 --> 00:21:38,036 (SNIFFING) 426 00:21:39,840 --> 00:21:41,251 -(SQUEALING) -Ahhh! 427 00:21:44,220 --> 00:21:47,508 My pants! They're shrinking! (GRUNTING) 428 00:21:48,182 --> 00:21:49,547 (CROWD LAUGHING) 429 00:21:51,018 --> 00:21:52,099 (WADDLES OINKING) 430 00:21:53,395 --> 00:21:54,806 (LAUGHS AND GAGS) 431 00:21:56,065 --> 00:21:57,146 Oh, man. 432 00:21:58,025 --> 00:21:59,936 (SIGHS) That'll do, pig. 433 00:22:00,319 --> 00:22:01,400 (OINKS) 434 00:22:02,530 --> 00:22:03,486 That'll do. 435 00:22:04,949 --> 00:22:07,941 You have broken the eternal laws of space-time! 436 00:22:08,118 --> 00:22:09,654 I beg your mercy, Time Baby! 437 00:22:09,870 --> 00:22:12,362 You now must clean up all of the anomalies. 438 00:22:16,752 --> 00:22:18,663 (VOCALIZING) 439 00:22:21,590 --> 00:22:25,049 Old Man McGucket, local kook. Are the wax figures alive, and... 440 00:22:26,345 --> 00:22:27,551 (ROARING) 441 00:22:29,473 --> 00:22:30,759 What're you looking at? 32394

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