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1
00:00:04,296 --> 00:00:05,631
Pam? Yeah?
2
00:00:06,089 --> 00:00:08,717
Did you see Oprah yesterday?
No, I didn't.
3
00:00:09,426 --> 00:00:12,638
I... I'm going to be a father.
4
00:00:15,390 --> 00:00:18,519
What was Oprah about?
Angelina Jolie was on.
5
00:00:18,602 --> 00:00:22,481
And she adopted a baby from Asia,
and she said that it changed her life,
6
00:00:22,564 --> 00:00:24,775
and that really inspired me.
7
00:00:25,067 --> 00:00:30,948
So I want you to look into see how
much a little Chinese baby would cost.
8
00:00:32,616 --> 00:00:35,285
That's a really big decision.
I know.
9
00:00:35,744 --> 00:00:37,913
Maybe you should wait
before you adopt.
10
00:00:37,996 --> 00:00:39,790
Well... or not adopt.
11
00:00:39,873 --> 00:00:41,708
Just do it, okay?
12
00:00:41,792 --> 00:00:46,004
Roy's sister looked into it and
the application alone costs $1,000.
13
00:00:48,799 --> 00:00:50,717
Well, find out
14
00:00:50,801 --> 00:00:55,389
if there's a cheaper, less
expensive baby out there, okay?
15
00:00:55,472 --> 00:00:58,058
You know, she also said the
waiting list is, like, eight months.
16
00:00:58,141 --> 00:00:59,268
Yeah. Eight months?
17
00:00:59,351 --> 00:01:01,287
I don't even know if I want
a baby in eight months.
18
00:01:01,311 --> 00:01:02,854
Probably won't.
19
00:01:05,607 --> 00:01:06,692
You know what, Pam?
20
00:01:06,775 --> 00:01:08,527
If in 10 years,
21
00:01:09,528 --> 00:01:12,489
I haven't had a baby
and you haven't had a baby...
22
00:01:12,573 --> 00:01:13,740
No, Michael.
23
00:01:14,616 --> 00:01:16,660
Twenty years. No, Michael.
24
00:01:17,786 --> 00:01:19,037
Thirty.
25
00:01:20,789 --> 00:01:22,040
Sure.
26
00:01:22,666 --> 00:01:24,126
It's a deal.
27
00:01:56,992 --> 00:01:58,869
All right, three pairs of pants.
28
00:01:58,952 --> 00:02:00,495
Three pairs of socks. Mmm-hmm.
29
00:02:00,704 --> 00:02:03,498
Three packs of condoms. Yes.
30
00:02:04,791 --> 00:02:06,793
Fun jeans. Right there.
31
00:02:09,963 --> 00:02:11,590
Sign. Per diem.
32
00:02:12,382 --> 00:02:15,052
Michael: Guess where I
am going? I will give you a hint.
33
00:02:15,510 --> 00:02:18,847
It is a booze-fuelled sex romp
where anything goes.
34
00:02:19,014 --> 00:02:20,599
You are correct, sir!
35
00:02:20,682 --> 00:02:21,850
I am headed to Philadelphia
36
00:02:21,933 --> 00:02:25,896
for the annual northeastern
mid-market office supply convention.
37
00:02:25,979 --> 00:02:29,566
And Jim Halpert is going to
be coming, which'ii be fun.
38
00:02:29,650 --> 00:02:34,029
Poor little guy has been stuck
working under Josh,
39
00:02:34,613 --> 00:02:38,742
the poor man's Michael Scott,
as he is known around my condo.
40
00:02:40,202 --> 00:02:42,746
Don't be mad,
it is a business trip.
41
00:02:42,829 --> 00:02:45,832
But I don't understand.
It's for managers.
42
00:02:45,916 --> 00:02:48,710
Monkey, I am an arm,
assistant regional manager.
43
00:02:48,794 --> 00:02:50,671
I know! It's...
44
00:02:51,963 --> 00:02:55,175
I was just really hoping we
could spend some time together.
45
00:02:58,720 --> 00:03:00,972
Are you still there?
Yes, monkey.
46
00:03:01,056 --> 00:03:04,601
Don't "monkey" me! You can't
wait to get out of here, arm!
47
00:03:05,936 --> 00:03:08,438
In the Martin family,
we like to say,
48
00:03:08,522 --> 00:03:11,566
"looks like someone took
the slow train from Philly."
49
00:03:11,650 --> 00:03:14,277
That's code for
"check out the slut."
50
00:03:15,529 --> 00:03:16,738
What is...
51
00:03:18,365 --> 00:03:19,658
Why are there flies in here?
52
00:03:19,866 --> 00:03:22,285
Oh, my god! Are you
so excited for tonight?
53
00:03:22,369 --> 00:03:24,705
I'm so excited. You guys
are gonna click, I can feel it.
54
00:03:24,788 --> 00:03:26,707
So what are you wearing?
55
00:03:26,790 --> 00:03:27,958
This.
56
00:03:31,128 --> 00:03:32,963
You look so pretty.
57
00:03:34,423 --> 00:03:35,757
Thank you.
58
00:03:36,758 --> 00:03:38,552
Pam: Yes, I have a date.
59
00:03:38,760 --> 00:03:41,555
He's a cartoonist
for the local paper,
60
00:03:41,638 --> 00:03:44,891
which is really neat,
because I like to draw, too.
61
00:03:46,017 --> 00:03:47,769
I'm kind of nervous.
62
00:03:48,353 --> 00:03:51,773
I haven't been on a
first date in nine years.
63
00:03:54,151 --> 00:03:55,986
Probably shouldn't
broadcast that.
64
00:03:57,320 --> 00:03:59,257
We”, remember, no matter
how much you may want to,
65
00:03:59,281 --> 00:04:02,200
do not sleep with him on the
first date, it gives him all the power.
66
00:04:02,284 --> 00:04:05,537
Sleep with who?
Whom? Whom? Whom?
67
00:04:05,620 --> 00:04:08,039
My neighbor, Alan. They're
going on a date tonight.
68
00:04:08,123 --> 00:04:11,042
Oh, wow! Oh, my god,
I have a great idea.
69
00:04:11,126 --> 00:04:14,171
You know what you should do? Be
hilarious. Wear your wedding dress.
70
00:04:14,254 --> 00:04:17,841
It'd be a great icebreaker!
And your veil.
71
00:04:17,924 --> 00:04:19,926
Yeah. Do it!
72
00:04:20,010 --> 00:04:22,304
I'll probably just wear this.
Really?
73
00:04:22,387 --> 00:04:24,347
Okay, well, word of advice,
74
00:04:24,431 --> 00:04:27,267
unbutton that top button,
let those things breathe.
75
00:04:27,559 --> 00:04:29,853
Any message you want me
to relate to Jim?
76
00:04:29,936 --> 00:04:31,980
"Um," okay. Um...
77
00:04:33,148 --> 00:04:34,191
You got that? I got it.
78
00:04:34,274 --> 00:04:35,984
Write it down.
I'll write it down.
79
00:04:36,735 --> 00:04:38,487
Um, um, um, um...
80
00:04:43,450 --> 00:04:45,118
There's my girl.
81
00:04:46,787 --> 00:04:48,580
Noticed you handing out
some shekels.
82
00:04:48,663 --> 00:04:50,540
How would one get on that train?
83
00:04:50,624 --> 00:04:52,709
That was per diem
for Philadelphia.
84
00:04:52,793 --> 00:04:54,586
That town smells
like cheese steaks.
85
00:04:54,669 --> 00:04:56,922
That town is full of history!
86
00:05:00,383 --> 00:05:02,803
Andrea's the office bitch.
87
00:05:03,220 --> 00:05:05,180
You'll get used to her.
88
00:05:08,266 --> 00:05:09,434
Creed.
89
00:05:13,605 --> 00:05:15,941
Can I have my neck pillow back?
90
00:05:16,441 --> 00:05:17,651
Michael!
91
00:05:18,610 --> 00:05:20,946
Can I have my neck pillow back?
92
00:05:24,491 --> 00:05:26,260
Josh: Hey, Michael. Michael:
Hey, Josh, how you doing?
93
00:05:26,284 --> 00:05:27,762
Pretty good, how you doing?
Good to see you.
94
00:05:27,786 --> 00:05:30,872
There he is! There's
the traitor. Traitor! Traitor!
95
00:05:30,956 --> 00:05:32,958
Come here, you. Come here!
96
00:05:35,293 --> 00:05:37,629
The... the progidal...
97
00:05:37,712 --> 00:05:39,297
My son returns!
98
00:05:39,840 --> 00:05:43,051
I was shocked when he told me
he was transferring to stamford.
99
00:05:43,134 --> 00:05:46,137
It's like with firemen, you
don't leave your brothers behind.
100
00:05:46,221 --> 00:05:47,848
Even if you find out
101
00:05:47,931 --> 00:05:51,726
that there is a better fire
in Connecticut.
102
00:05:52,310 --> 00:05:55,438
It's really good to
see you, man. Yeah.
103
00:05:56,022 --> 00:05:58,775
Wow. I didn't expect that.
104
00:05:59,109 --> 00:06:01,319
It's good to see you, too.
105
00:06:01,403 --> 00:06:06,283
Oh, hey, how's it going up there?
Have you made any sales yet?
106
00:06:06,700 --> 00:06:08,034
Yeah, sold about 40,000.
107
00:06:08,118 --> 00:06:09,786
Dwight: Hey!
Shut up, that's impossible.
108
00:06:09,870 --> 00:06:13,290
No, it's not, and I did, yeah.
Well, I did it, too.
109
00:06:14,958 --> 00:06:16,167
You know, when I saw Dwight,
110
00:06:16,251 --> 00:06:18,962
ireahzed how stupid and petty
111
00:06:19,045 --> 00:06:20,630
all those pranks
I pulled on him were.
112
00:06:22,215 --> 00:06:23,925
And then he spoke.
113
00:06:25,218 --> 00:06:27,929
I wonder how hard it would be
to get a copy of his room key.
114
00:06:28,722 --> 00:06:30,181
So did you hear? What?
115
00:06:30,265 --> 00:06:31,892
Pam's back on the market again.
116
00:06:31,975 --> 00:06:33,351
Really? She's dating?
117
00:06:34,185 --> 00:06:37,230
If I weren't engaged,
I would so hit that.
118
00:06:41,651 --> 00:06:43,862
So what kind of commissions
you get up there?
119
00:06:43,945 --> 00:06:46,907
Oh, Dwight,
I missed you so much.
120
00:06:47,616 --> 00:06:49,451
You're so immature.
121
00:06:50,368 --> 00:06:53,246
Listen, Michael, I heard
you were a great salesman,
122
00:06:53,455 --> 00:06:54,682
and I just wanted
to let you know
123
00:06:54,706 --> 00:06:56,291
that if our branch
absorbs your branch,
124
00:06:56,374 --> 00:06:58,376
I'm gonna look for a
place for you in stamford.
125
00:06:58,460 --> 00:06:59,502
Jan: On, hey!
126
00:06:59,586 --> 00:07:00,587
Hey. Josh: Hey, jan.
127
00:07:00,670 --> 00:07:02,005
We all checked in? Yes.
128
00:07:02,088 --> 00:07:04,841
Great. Let's dump our stuff and
meet back down here in half an hour.
129
00:07:04,925 --> 00:07:06,259
Josh: Okay. Jan: Okay.
130
00:07:06,343 --> 00:07:07,469
Jan?
131
00:07:08,303 --> 00:07:11,097
Look, I think we need to set
some ground rules.
132
00:07:11,181 --> 00:07:15,101
What are you talking about? The
800-pound gorilla in the room. Carole?
133
00:07:15,185 --> 00:07:16,311
I'm still dating her,
134
00:07:16,394 --> 00:07:20,273
so nothing can happen
between us at the convention.
135
00:07:20,440 --> 00:07:22,025
Step away from me, Michael.
136
00:07:22,108 --> 00:07:25,153
Thank you for being so brave
with all of this.
137
00:07:25,737 --> 00:07:27,072
Thank you.
138
00:07:33,870 --> 00:07:36,289
Alan's cartoon's
so funny, right?
139
00:07:36,915 --> 00:07:38,458
And they're, like, so smart.
140
00:07:38,541 --> 00:07:41,252
I don't even know what
they mean half the time.
141
00:07:56,184 --> 00:07:59,479
This party is gonna
be awesome! I know!
142
00:07:59,562 --> 00:08:04,025
That is specifically why I chose
a room close to the elevator.
143
00:08:04,109 --> 00:08:06,569
More foot traffic. Check it out.
144
00:08:07,028 --> 00:08:09,489
That is crooked. On that side.
145
00:08:09,572 --> 00:08:10,699
Wow.
146
00:08:11,241 --> 00:08:13,034
Michael: Hey, hey!
147
00:08:13,118 --> 00:08:15,453
That is a lot of liquor.
Michael: Yeah.
148
00:08:15,537 --> 00:08:16,830
And a dartboard.
149
00:08:16,913 --> 00:08:19,541
Well, that's how we do it in
Scranton, or did you forget?
150
00:08:19,624 --> 00:08:21,626
Ain't no party like
a Scranton party
151
00:08:21,710 --> 00:08:23,545
'cause a Scranton party
don't stop!
152
00:08:26,965 --> 00:08:29,467
We should probably head on
down, you know, hook up with jan.
153
00:08:29,551 --> 00:08:32,429
Hey, well, we have time!
One for the road, gentlemen?
154
00:08:33,096 --> 00:08:35,140
"A shot of midori, perhaps?"
155
00:08:40,186 --> 00:08:41,604
Oh, no, sorry,
it's an inside joke.
156
00:08:41,688 --> 00:08:44,065
There's this bartender
in stamford who...
157
00:08:44,149 --> 00:08:46,693
You know what?
You just had to be there.
158
00:08:47,110 --> 00:08:49,571
I wish I was!
I love inside jokes.
159
00:08:50,113 --> 00:08:52,615
Love to be
a part of one someday.
160
00:08:58,580 --> 00:08:59,622
We should... yeah!
161
00:08:59,706 --> 00:09:02,250
All right, see you guys down
there. See you guys. All right.
162
00:09:02,333 --> 00:09:03,918
Change your mind, come back up.
163
00:09:04,002 --> 00:09:05,503
I'll do a shot
with you, Michael.
164
00:09:05,587 --> 00:09:08,298
Don't be gross.
It's not even lunch yet.
165
00:09:12,343 --> 00:09:13,845
Swag!
166
00:09:14,429 --> 00:09:16,473
Stuff we all get.
167
00:09:16,556 --> 00:09:20,852
I basically decorated my condo
for free with all of my swag!
168
00:09:21,352 --> 00:09:23,563
Dwight: Check it out!
Oh, my god.
169
00:09:23,646 --> 00:09:25,732
Hi! I'm Michael Scott,
dunder Mifflin.
170
00:09:25,815 --> 00:09:27,752
Dwight schrute, assistant
regional manager, dunder Mifflin.
171
00:09:27,776 --> 00:09:30,028
All right. I'm a huge fan.
172
00:09:30,111 --> 00:09:31,672
Thanks, appreciate it, guys.
You know what?
173
00:09:31,696 --> 00:09:34,491
I'm having a big blowout tonight,
room 308, hope you can come.
174
00:09:34,574 --> 00:09:37,035
All right, maybe. If I can.
Well, cool!
175
00:09:37,118 --> 00:09:40,038
Okay, so can I tell people
you're gonna be there?
176
00:09:40,121 --> 00:09:42,916
No, you cannot.
So maybe. See you.
177
00:09:43,666 --> 00:09:46,711
Why do they call him "the
bus"? Because he's afraid to fly.
178
00:09:46,961 --> 00:09:48,129
Smile!
179
00:09:48,213 --> 00:09:50,507
Do you remember me
from last year?
180
00:09:50,590 --> 00:09:52,592
There's a party in my room, 308.
181
00:09:52,675 --> 00:09:54,111
Can't miss it,
right off the elevator.
182
00:09:54,135 --> 00:09:55,595
Tonight! Be there!
183
00:09:56,096 --> 00:09:57,555
All right, jan just e-mailed me.
184
00:09:57,639 --> 00:09:59,015
She wants us to
meet her up front.
185
00:09:59,099 --> 00:10:02,685
Yup! Yeah, she's up front. You
don't have e-mail on your phone.
186
00:10:02,769 --> 00:10:05,355
I don't have to, I just know.
187
00:10:06,231 --> 00:10:07,649
Yes? Hello?
188
00:10:08,983 --> 00:10:10,461
No one just called you.
All right. Nice meeting you.
189
00:10:10,485 --> 00:10:11,545
Take care. Nice to meet you.
190
00:10:11,569 --> 00:10:12,630
I'll see you soon.
Yeah, stop by.
191
00:10:12,654 --> 00:10:14,781
Take care.
See you in a bit. Bye-bye.
192
00:10:14,864 --> 00:10:17,617
May I have
a moment of your time, please?
193
00:10:18,785 --> 00:10:20,705
I need you to do something
for me. Yes, anything.
194
00:10:20,787 --> 00:10:22,705
I want you to
dig up some dirt on Josh,
195
00:10:22,789 --> 00:10:24,642
find out if there are
any skeletons in his attic.
196
00:10:24,666 --> 00:10:26,918
I'll talk to my buddy down
at the station, stat.
197
00:10:27,961 --> 00:10:29,254
Toby: Hey, Pam.
198
00:10:29,796 --> 00:10:31,923
Hey, what's up?
It's... how are...
199
00:10:32,006 --> 00:10:33,359
I might ask if you wanted...
200
00:10:33,383 --> 00:10:35,552
Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam.
201
00:10:36,636 --> 00:10:38,805
He's not in the office.
Can I take a message?
202
00:10:40,306 --> 00:10:41,599
I will.
203
00:10:42,225 --> 00:10:43,476
You, too.
204
00:10:44,811 --> 00:10:46,187
Sorry, what's up?
205
00:10:54,112 --> 00:10:56,531
I just completely forgot
what I was gonna say.
206
00:10:56,614 --> 00:10:58,158
It's so weird.
207
00:10:59,117 --> 00:11:00,368
Okay.
208
00:11:00,451 --> 00:11:03,246
Well, if you think of it,
I'll be here.
209
00:11:03,413 --> 00:11:04,539
Okay.
210
00:11:10,378 --> 00:11:13,381
So I called my buddy down
at the station today
211
00:11:14,257 --> 00:11:17,010
to have him run a background
check on Josh Porter,
212
00:11:17,093 --> 00:11:19,679
see if there's any known
aliases, etcetera.
213
00:11:19,762 --> 00:11:23,183
He wasn't volunteering today.
And?
214
00:11:27,937 --> 00:11:31,566
Yeah. Things have been
pretty crazy around the office.
215
00:11:31,649 --> 00:11:33,568
Yeah. Oh, yeah?
216
00:11:33,651 --> 00:11:36,112
We moved Ryan
over to your desk...
217
00:11:37,113 --> 00:11:40,950
Tell him I say hi. I will call
him later with that message.
218
00:11:41,284 --> 00:11:43,244
Hey, how's Toby?
219
00:11:43,870 --> 00:11:48,416
Toby Flenderson is everything
that is wrong with the paper industry.
220
00:11:49,292 --> 00:11:50,501
Is he why you left?
221
00:11:50,585 --> 00:11:53,963
Oh, no, itwasjust, you know, a
good opportunity for me, a promotion.
222
00:11:54,047 --> 00:11:56,341
I got a chance to... opportunity,
promotion, blah, blah...
223
00:11:56,424 --> 00:11:58,885
You know, Jim,
those are just words.
224
00:11:58,968 --> 00:12:03,598
Have you taken into account
other factors, vis-a-vis bosses?
225
00:12:03,681 --> 00:12:06,726
Is Josh funnier than I am?
Does he even have a girlfriend?
226
00:12:06,809 --> 00:12:08,353
Because I have two, basically.
227
00:12:08,436 --> 00:12:11,189
Michael, it's really
not a competition.
228
00:12:12,815 --> 00:12:15,335
Jim got us a great lead with the
new rep from national envelope.
229
00:12:15,401 --> 00:12:17,487
Really? Great. We can
grab lunch with him tomorrow.
230
00:12:17,570 --> 00:12:20,657
Hey, jan? Jan? Don't
worry, I have got the tip.
231
00:12:21,282 --> 00:12:23,493
Whoa, Michael! Wow!
232
00:12:23,576 --> 00:12:24,929
Oh, my god, thank you!
Hey, no problem.
233
00:12:24,953 --> 00:12:28,706
Was that your per diem? No,
that was a different $100 bill.
234
00:12:28,790 --> 00:12:30,250
What have you generated,
Michael?
235
00:12:30,333 --> 00:12:34,170
I have generated a lot of
interest in my party this evening.
236
00:12:35,129 --> 00:12:36,130
What party?
237
00:12:36,214 --> 00:12:39,801
The party I'm having tonight in
308, obviously, you are invited.
238
00:12:41,135 --> 00:12:45,765
Michael, Jim and Josh
are in meetings all day,
239
00:12:45,848 --> 00:12:48,726
and I am in and out of meetings.
240
00:12:49,978 --> 00:12:52,647
I... I can't
stay on top of you 24/7.
241
00:12:58,528 --> 00:13:01,072
You should order the most
expensive thing on the menu.
242
00:13:01,197 --> 00:13:03,116
So he knows you're worth it.
243
00:13:03,950 --> 00:13:06,452
If you do that,
you're gonna have to put out.
244
00:13:08,955 --> 00:13:10,707
Oh, yeah,
you'll have to put out.
245
00:13:12,458 --> 00:13:14,294
Is there a key for a Jane Doe?
246
00:13:16,296 --> 00:13:17,588
Thank you.
247
00:13:20,049 --> 00:13:22,010
Any messages for 308?
248
00:13:23,886 --> 00:13:25,221
All right.
249
00:13:25,513 --> 00:13:27,682
Hey, hey, fellers. Michael!
250
00:13:27,765 --> 00:13:28,808
Hey, Michael! What's up?
251
00:13:28,891 --> 00:13:31,769
Well, Jim and I have a meeting
with uni-ball in about 45 minutes,
252
00:13:31,853 --> 00:13:33,855
so we should probably go now.
Hey, check this out!
253
00:13:33,938 --> 00:13:36,566
How about that?
A little friendly competition.
254
00:13:36,649 --> 00:13:40,236
Stamford versus Scranton. I
don't think so... I don't really...
255
00:13:40,820 --> 00:13:45,116
Jim, looks like you picked a
bad time to defect, my friend.
256
00:13:45,700 --> 00:13:49,454
Fine, all right.
Okay! Excellent.
257
00:13:50,330 --> 00:13:53,041
Do the wing flaps.
Oh, just shut it.
258
00:13:54,375 --> 00:13:55,668
Hey, Pam, what's up?
259
00:13:56,836 --> 00:14:01,174
Yeah. No, tell him I will give him
general specifics tomorrow, okay?
260
00:14:01,257 --> 00:14:03,384
Yes. Say hi to Pam!
261
00:14:03,718 --> 00:14:04,802
Hi, Pam! Hi, Pam.
262
00:14:04,886 --> 00:14:07,388
Yes. That is Josh
and Dwight and Jim.
263
00:14:08,014 --> 00:14:09,057
Pam says hi.
264
00:14:09,640 --> 00:14:10,808
Have fun on your date.
265
00:14:11,601 --> 00:14:13,519
Very good,
talk to you later. Bye.
266
00:14:20,109 --> 00:14:21,444
Michael: You first!
267
00:14:21,778 --> 00:14:23,029
Come on.
268
00:14:23,112 --> 00:14:24,572
Nice try, Josh!
269
00:14:24,655 --> 00:14:26,657
Not. Hit the... hit the rim.
270
00:14:26,783 --> 00:14:28,284
Okay, and...
271
00:14:30,578 --> 00:14:32,455
Okay, double or nothing.
272
00:14:32,538 --> 00:14:35,041
On what? We didn't bet
anything, Michael, we...
273
00:14:35,124 --> 00:14:37,585
Well, we... let's... you know,
we should go. We gotta go.
274
00:14:37,668 --> 00:14:40,546
Come on. Come on!
We'll do it later.
275
00:14:40,630 --> 00:14:41,631
Let's go...
276
00:14:41,756 --> 00:14:43,299
Say, while I have you here,
277
00:14:43,383 --> 00:14:45,402
could I talk to you about some
new and exciting advances
278
00:14:45,426 --> 00:14:46,928
to our product line? Fine.
279
00:14:47,261 --> 00:14:48,989
Jim and I have different
definitions of friendship.
280
00:14:49,013 --> 00:14:51,182
I think it's talking
and being friends,
281
00:14:51,265 --> 00:14:53,393
and Jim thinks
it's moving to Connecticut
282
00:14:53,476 --> 00:14:55,937
and being best friends
with Josh. Well...
283
00:14:56,437 --> 00:14:59,899
Phooey on that.
284
00:14:59,982 --> 00:15:03,653
I'm done. I am not going to
be speaking with him anymore.
285
00:15:04,112 --> 00:15:06,823
Whatevs. Long-distance
relationships never work.
286
00:15:06,906 --> 00:15:08,533
That is so true.
287
00:15:09,700 --> 00:15:10,910
Ready?
288
00:15:11,285 --> 00:15:14,455
Okay, let me tell you what
we're looking for. Great.
289
00:15:16,249 --> 00:15:18,501
Michael: Sorry,
my meeting ran late.
290
00:15:19,168 --> 00:15:21,879
Really? Yes, jan, really,
291
00:15:21,963 --> 00:15:23,256
with the rep from hammermill.
292
00:15:23,339 --> 00:15:24,632
They're exclusive with staples.
293
00:15:24,715 --> 00:15:25,883
Used to be.
294
00:15:26,175 --> 00:15:28,237
Evan'll call you in the
morning to work out the details.
295
00:15:28,261 --> 00:15:30,346
We can now
sell hammermill products.
296
00:15:30,555 --> 00:15:31,889
Yes!
297
00:15:32,932 --> 00:15:36,853
Well, Michael, I just...
I underestimated you.
298
00:15:36,936 --> 00:15:40,523
Yeah, well, maybe next time
you will estimate me.
299
00:15:43,818 --> 00:15:45,486
Dwight's room key.
300
00:15:46,362 --> 00:15:48,072
And Dwight's room.
301
00:15:49,115 --> 00:15:51,659
What can I say?
Old habits die hard.
302
00:15:51,742 --> 00:15:52,869
Angela: D?
303
00:15:54,704 --> 00:15:57,331
Oh, my god! Dwight got a hooker!
304
00:15:58,040 --> 00:16:00,334
Oh, my god, I gotta call...
305
00:16:00,418 --> 00:16:03,129
Well, I gotta call somebody,
I don't even know who to call.
306
00:16:03,212 --> 00:16:04,964
Dwight got a hooker!
307
00:16:05,089 --> 00:16:08,509
So, Alan, Pam is
obsessed with your cartoons.
308
00:16:08,593 --> 00:16:10,470
She reads them every day.
309
00:16:10,553 --> 00:16:11,929
Oh, great.
310
00:16:12,638 --> 00:16:14,307
I don't like ketchup.
You love ketchup!
311
00:16:14,390 --> 00:16:15,850
He loves ketchup.
312
00:16:16,392 --> 00:16:19,145
So how do you come up
with your cartoons?
313
00:16:20,980 --> 00:16:24,525
Oh, I just... I kind of
think about stuff that I see.
314
00:16:25,109 --> 00:16:26,652
Or dream them.
315
00:16:27,361 --> 00:16:30,114
You dream in cartoons? How fun.
316
00:16:33,075 --> 00:16:34,827
Hey! First guest!
317
00:16:34,911 --> 00:16:37,580
You are going to have
some Tequila, my friend.
318
00:16:38,247 --> 00:16:41,000
I thought there was a party
in here. This is the party.
319
00:16:41,083 --> 00:16:43,669
This is room 308? Party central!
320
00:16:43,753 --> 00:16:46,297
So what can I do you for?
All right.
321
00:16:49,842 --> 00:16:51,427
See, this one is great
322
00:16:51,511 --> 00:16:54,472
because it could work
on a couple different levels.
323
00:16:56,265 --> 00:16:58,976
"More freedom fries
for the table?"
324
00:16:59,310 --> 00:17:01,562
"Freedom fries". Yeah.
325
00:17:03,231 --> 00:17:06,609
Yeah, I mean, people always
say, like, "don't be edgy,"
326
00:17:06,692 --> 00:17:09,695
but I don't know...
I don't know any other way.
327
00:17:10,863 --> 00:17:12,573
Yeah, you got it.
328
00:17:28,005 --> 00:17:30,508
Well, it was... it was really
nice meeting you, Alan.
329
00:17:30,591 --> 00:17:32,236
Yeah, next time bring
some of your illustrations.
330
00:17:32,260 --> 00:17:34,053
I'll let you pick my brain.
331
00:17:35,054 --> 00:17:36,722
"More freedom fries"! Yeah!
332
00:17:36,806 --> 00:17:38,307
Okay. That's great.
333
00:17:38,391 --> 00:17:40,017
Pam: I went on a date.
334
00:17:40,226 --> 00:17:41,644
It wasn't a love connection.
335
00:17:43,145 --> 00:17:46,899
I think when I like someone
again, I'll just kind of know.
336
00:18:06,752 --> 00:18:08,045
Jim: Michael.
337
00:18:13,718 --> 00:18:15,386
Am I the first to arrive?
338
00:18:15,970 --> 00:18:18,055
People have been
filtering in and out.
339
00:18:20,349 --> 00:18:22,351
Can I get a drink? What?
340
00:18:23,060 --> 00:18:24,770
Can I get a drink?
341
00:18:25,396 --> 00:18:26,606
Sure.
342
00:18:31,193 --> 00:18:34,447
Do you like cosmos?
Yeah, sure, sounds good.
343
00:18:35,448 --> 00:18:38,492
So why are you here?
Is Josh busy?
344
00:18:38,868 --> 00:18:40,369
Michael... I get it!
345
00:18:40,453 --> 00:18:42,264
Did I do something or...
No. No, ltotally get it!
346
00:18:42,288 --> 00:18:44,290
He made a better paper airplane,
347
00:18:44,373 --> 00:18:46,709
stamford does better
in sales. You...
348
00:18:47,918 --> 00:18:50,254
I get it, we had some fun.
We had some laughs...
349
00:18:50,338 --> 00:18:53,215
Wait, wait, wait. I didn't
transfer because of you.
350
00:18:54,050 --> 00:18:55,551
You're a good boss.
351
00:18:56,177 --> 00:18:57,511
You're a great boss.
352
00:19:01,057 --> 00:19:03,225
I'm not better than Josh.
353
00:19:03,309 --> 00:19:05,478
Michael, it's not about...
354
00:19:07,229 --> 00:19:09,106
I transferred because of Pam.
355
00:19:11,192 --> 00:19:12,568
Oh, my god.
356
00:19:14,737 --> 00:19:16,822
You don't even know.
She's single now.
357
00:19:16,906 --> 00:19:19,533
No, I... I heard something
about that.
358
00:19:20,034 --> 00:19:23,162
It's just... I kind of
put it all on the line.
359
00:19:24,830 --> 00:19:27,708
Twice, actually.
And she said no.
360
00:19:28,918 --> 00:19:30,086
Twice.
361
00:19:33,047 --> 00:19:35,633
I'm sorry, man,
I'm sorry, it's...
362
00:19:37,927 --> 00:19:39,637
Hey, you know what?
I will talk to her.
363
00:19:39,720 --> 00:19:40,846
Nope, that's okay.
364
00:19:40,930 --> 00:19:42,010
Yeah. No, that's all right.
365
00:19:42,056 --> 00:19:44,225
I will. I'll talk to her.
366
00:19:45,476 --> 00:19:47,478
You should at least talk to Roy,
367
00:19:47,561 --> 00:19:50,898
I mean, he knows exactly
how you're feeling, just...
368
00:19:51,482 --> 00:19:52,608
Yeah.
369
00:19:53,609 --> 00:19:55,111
Okay, maybe.
370
00:19:56,195 --> 00:19:57,238
Evan: Are we early?
371
00:19:57,321 --> 00:20:00,408
Hey! No, you know, people
have been filtering in and out.
372
00:20:00,991 --> 00:20:03,285
Hey. Evan, this is Jim.
How are you?
373
00:20:03,369 --> 00:20:06,372
Hey, Arnie rissman,
Michael, Jim.
374
00:20:06,622 --> 00:20:07,662
Hey, Arnie, how you doing?
375
00:20:08,624 --> 00:20:09,875
You guys work together?
376
00:20:09,959 --> 00:20:11,335
No, we used to. Yeah.
377
00:20:11,419 --> 00:20:13,879
Now we're friends. Best friends.
378
00:20:15,756 --> 00:20:21,137
Some people need dozens of friends
to say, "hey, look at me, I'm popular!"
379
00:20:21,846 --> 00:20:25,141
But not me. I'm very picky.
I need three, maybe two.
380
00:20:25,558 --> 00:20:28,728
When you meet that someone
special, you'll just know,
381
00:20:28,811 --> 00:20:31,188
because a real relationship,
382
00:20:31,897 --> 00:20:33,649
it can't be forced.
383
00:20:34,316 --> 00:20:37,153
It should just
come about effortlessly.
384
00:20:39,655 --> 00:20:43,033
Now would you do me the
pleasure of hitting the lights, sir?
385
00:20:49,123 --> 00:20:50,541
Michael: What are
all those stains?
386
00:20:51,083 --> 00:20:52,501
Dwight: Blood, urine, or semen.
387
00:20:52,585 --> 00:20:54,462
Oh, god, I hope it's urine.
27370
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