Original subtitles

It seems so real, I can feel it.

And it seems so real, I can taste

it.

And it seems so real, I can hear

it.

So why can't I trust it?

So why can't I trust it?

His name was Pondo.

Pondo Sinatra.

You know he came to the college on

the back of a turnip truck?

That's the truth.

The problem was, he had only one thing

on his mind.

He had a heart on him.

I was a janitor at that college for

23 years, and I never seen a boy

try harder than he did to get himself

a woman.

But he was jinxed.

Even for a white boy, he was awful.

Old Pondo had an almost supernatural ability to

get on the wrong side of a woman.

Who would have ever thought it would turn

out the way it did?

Strangely enough, I was his best friend through

the whole ordeal.

I remember the first time I saw him

driving up in the back of that turnip

truck.

I thought to myself, now there's a geek.

But basically, he was just a very nice

guy.

He just had a one-track mind.

He was obsessed.

I went out with Pondo once, and one

time only.

Never again.

I'd heard about him, and everything I heard

about him was true.

And now he's famous.

I don't believe it.

There was something about him.

I think he made me want to throw

up.

He was what you call in America a

nerd.

All this talk is like Pondo was turned

into this big myth or something.

He was just an ordinary guy.

He was very horny, yes, but he was

an ordinary guy.

I heard he was raised on a pig

farm.

I believe it.

He wasn't that bad.

I was the first one.

It all started with me.

I think I'm the one that should be

famous, not him, creep.

I tried to introduce him to campus life.

There were some amazing-looking girls at this

school.

I tried to teach him about sports.

I tried to teach him to walk like

a step.

It was hopeless.

I mean, everyone agreed.

Pondo Sinatra was going to die a virgin.

I never dreamed that it would turn out

the way it did.

Women hate me.

It's ridiculous.

I'd sell my soul for a piece of

ass.

Don't say that.

It's true.

I know it might be true, but don't

say it out loud.

I'd sell my soul for a piece of

ass!

I'm sorry.

I'm not that kind of a girl.

Yes, you are.

Pondo, stop it.

Why?

I don't know you well enough.

Please.

No.

I'm a virgin.

Get used to it.

Please, I gotta know what it's like.

I'm going blind.

Pondo, don't beg.

Why not?

Drive me home.

Bend over and I'll drive you home.

That's disgusting.

Don't go.

I'm sorry.

Please.

Pondo Sinatra, everything I've heard about you is

true.

You're an animal, and you're disgusting, and you're

gross.

Can I call you tomorrow?

Seduction is an art.

You make love, you create art.

You, Pondo, you wage war, you understand?

Buddy, it is a war.

It's hell.

Old Pondo was 26 years old when he

started to college.

Now, you've heard of a second-year senior.

Well, old Pondo, he was a fifth-year

senior.

They finally held an election and booted the

boy out.

Hey!

Hey!

Hey!

Hey!

Hey!

Hey!

Hey!

Hey!

Hey!

Hey!

You have to learn to set...

set the mood.

The mood.

Romance.

Romance.

War.

War.

Charmer.

Charmer.

Atmosphere.

Pondo, set the stage.

Oh, it's lovely, Eric.

Oh, it's lovely, Eric.

Here we go!

Welcome to the ladybug!

OK, Natasha, here it is.

This is so lovely!

Look at the berries and the sky.

Oh, Pando!

This is beautiful.

It is round there like snow!

Oh, Pando, this is so romantic.

Just set in the stage.

The stage?

I love the theatre.

Oh, indeed.

Your blocks, your stones, your worst and senseless

things, your creaks where dead man's fingers grow.

Brilliant, bravo!

Fantastic.

Fantastic.

One, two, three.

Thank you.

Of course you know I'm theatre major, yes?

I am a thespian.

You're a lesbian?

No!

I am an actress.

Oh, fun.

I like to show off.

You see?

Yeah.

Curtain.

We got a live one, Pando.

Big blue.

Oh, God, I love nature.

I love the sun and its hydrogen licking

my burning skin.

I love grass growing up out of the

ground.

Protoplasm come to get me.

I love the wind whirling.

What's that?

Um, a hearing aid.

Oh.

I talk louder.

That's OK.

That's fine.

It's fine.

Don't panic.

Give her the champagne.

Do you want some champagne?

I can do without the champagne.

Just give me the pen.

Don't whine.

Don't whine.

Oh, it's fun, yes?

Are you a poet?

Are you a wit?

I'm a nitwit.

I'm a nitwit.

I'm a halfwit.

I'm a halfwit.

I'm a moron.

I'm a moron.

Really?

Goddamn you, Stanley.

Will you just trust me on this, OK?

Before you...

Before you...

I am wordless and brainless.

I am wordless and brainless.

Struck dumb.

Struck dumb.

And left mindless.

And left mindless.

Before the ferocious intelligence of your beauty.

Before the ferocious intelligence of your beauty.

You silver-tongued little devil.

No devil.

No devil.

You are certainly no saint.

I am a pilgrim.

I am a pilgrim.

Come to worship.

Come to worship.

Worship what, pilgrim?

My headphones are out!

That's OK.

I can hear you.

Worship what, pilgrim?

Uh, no.

Worship what?

Tell me and I'm yours.

You tell me.

Make up something.

Uh, the holy spot.

No!

The fertile delta.

No!

The bearded clam.

Fondo!

I thought you were a boy.

I am.

I am.

Well, then make love to me in verse.

Go.

Do it.

Do it.

But I'm leaving.

Roses are red.

Violets are blue.

You got big tits.

I want to suck on them, too.

I'm leaving.

Wait!

Natasha!

Good evening, ladies and gentlemen.

I can get down.

Oh, yeah.

I'm a party animal.

I can get down.

How do you expect me to party with

no tools?

Basically, it was a free, super-mighty majesty

kept to my mouth.

I kept getting put down.

Never knew.

No, no, no, no.

I never knew.

Now, what am I?

All I do is get down.

I'm a party animal, I'm a party animal.

I'm a party animal, you suck, so I

go out.

I never do.

Solution, love is a dream.

Ponder, you have got to learn to knock.

You got enough knockers in here.

What you want?

I'm going to kill myself.

I don't, I don't give up.

All right, all right, I'll help you.

You will?

Sure.

You ever seen the school nurse?

She's beautiful.

She's yours.

What?

What are you asking?

What do I say to her?

You get her to examine you.

What do I say?

Tell her you got a problem with your

pecker.

I got a problem with my pecker.

Your what?

My hooter.

How long have you had it?

Well, I had my hooter all my life.

What's the problem with your member?

My what?

Your member.

Well, I never thought of him as a

member.

I kind of always thought of him as

a loner.

Take off your pants.

Underwear, too?

I'll take off mine if you take off

yours.

Get up on the table.

No, no, no.

Hey!

Ow!

She came at you with a face like

a flower.

Her miniskirt, short boots, and whiskey sour.

Don't know why they want to grow up

so fast and lose precious hours.

She's just a girl.

Just a girl.

You make them up and set them up

and give them some lines.

That 14-year-old's acting like she's 29.

She thinks she's got it made, but loses

every time.

She's just a girl.

Just a girl.

She's just a girl.

And you welcome her with open arms.

You could be her father.

She's just a girl.

Just a girl.

Say that she wants, and I'll give it

to her.

Don't you see?

She's just a girl.

Just a girl.

She's just a girl.

She's only a girl.

Oh.

She's just a girl.

Just a girl.

She's just a girl.

She's only a girl.

Don't you see?

She's just a girl.

Just a girl.

She's just a girl.

Just a girl.

She's just a girl.

Just a girl.

She's just a girl.

Just a girl.

Pondo, you've got to quit giving up.

You just need some training.

Training?

What do you mean, training?

You need to know what to do.

I don't know what to do.

But you don't know how to do it.

You need a teacher.

You said you were my teacher.

What?

You said you were my teacher.

I want to take you to see my

teacher, Elba.

Oh?

Elba.

Okay.

Oh, shit, Studley.

I'm sorry.

Hey, it's all right, man.

So you come to old Elba for some

advice, huh?

Yes, sir.

You ain't getting no pussy, is you?

No, sir.

Why do you think we call pussy pussy?

Well, I don't know, sir.

Because it's furry?

No.

Because it's warm?

Uh-uh.

Because it scratches when it gets angry?

No.

Well, what then?

No, it don't purr.

And it don't meow.

Then why do we call it pussy?

I don't know, sir.

Because that old hound dog want to eat

it up.

You've got to be the hound dog.

You've got to let that pussy know you

the hound dog.

Put it in your mind.

Be it in your body.

Hound dog's gonna eat that pussy!

Hear you say that, boy.

Hound dog is gonna eat that pussy.

No, no, no.

Hound dog's gonna eat that pussy.

Hound dog is going to eat that pussy.

Hound dog!

Hound dog.

One more time.

Hound dog's gonna eat that pussy!

Hound Dog is gonna eat that pussy!

♪ ♪ I can't live without you, you

know ♪

I can't live without you, me oh, me

oh ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ Hound Dog

is gonna eat that pussy ♪ Hound Dog

is gonna eat that pussy ♪ Yeah, what's

going on, nigger?

Get down.

All right.

Hey, brothers.

We'll be the deans tonight.

Don't wanna go home on three legs.

Hey, now that's what I'm talking about.

Hey, you ain't a man till you made

it with a ten.

Hey, Barry, what's rackin'?

Hey, excuse me, sucker.

Hound Dog's not running with the pack tonight.

Evening, darling.

Hound Dog's come to make love.

Hey, brothers.

Listen.

Take note and look.

Cause the Hound Dog, he done written the

book.

I'm a man.

I'm a brother.

I'm a soul brother.

I'm a...

honky.

♪

♪

♪

♪ ♪

Hi, girls.

My name's Lulabelle.

Would you like to play some cards?

What kind of cards do you want to

play?

Strip poker?

Fine.

All right, now, does everybody understand how to

play?

I don't understand.

You mean, if I lose, I lose my

clothes?

Absolutely.

Littlest card loses.

Oh, so.

If I lose, I lose big, no?

Take one.

Let's see.

There you go.

One for you.

Okay, show your cards.

Seven.

Nine.

Nine?

What did you get?

I got a two.

Oh!

Well, you got to play by the rules.

Off it comes.

I'm embarrassed.

Don't be, just dance.

Come on.

Show the boobie.

Take off your goddamn shirt.

Hey!

Ta-da!

Wow!

Beautiful!

A little more.

Sorry, everybody.

I win.

Bye.

I lose.

Take your shirt off.

Oh, I lose one.

Now walk.

Easy card, easy card.

Quickly, quickly.

Two.

Okay, baby.

Oh!

Oh!

Hello, Abel.

How come you always win?

Shut up.

All right, go ahead.

Eyes are

open wide As he cried Even the boys

they stopped and cried He could tell Skin,

watch and uniform To this day How many

times to die a door Who can say.

No peace through chemistry When a warrior cries.

This sorrow's sad reply What's that?

She's a little lady, perhaps.

That's no lady.

Women hate me.

It's because I'm ugly.

You're not ugly.

I'm short.

Napoleon was short.

Did he ever get laid?

All the time.

I'm from Alabama!

I'm sure that southern people get laid.

Studley, we lost the war.

Yeah, I know, but, I mean, that was

years ago.

A defeat like that Kills all the romance

in a woman's heart.

I really find that hard to believe.

I'd sell my soul for a piece of

ass.

Don't say that.

It's true.

I know it might be true, but don't

say it out loud.

I'd sell my soul for a piece of

ass!

I think you need some new clothes.

Clothes make the man.

Now, I want you to go to Willinger's.

You got that?

Willinger's.

It's a clothing store.

You tell them to give you the works.

Willinger's.

Studley said to give me the works.

Help!

Goddamn fuckwackers!

Damn you, Studley!

Hi, Studley.

Oh, no, no!

Ah!

I am not an animal.

Bullshit!

That's an animal!

Whoa!

Hondo, don't worry about it, because I got

it all figured out.

This is absolutely guaranteed to get you laid.

I have never seen this fail.

Fine.

Whistle One

blowjob, $22.50. One handjob, $11.50. One

hemorrhoid massage, $12.95. Hi, girls.

Pop it.

Come on.

No, don't go away.

Come on.

Don't be embarrassed.

Attaboy.

Hi, girls.

What the hell?

Oh, no.

At least only a cockroach would love it.

I got money.

How you dare to fuck my father?

Okay, wait for me!

Studley?

Studley?

Damn.

All dressed up and no place to go.

And it's

fine.

Now I'm always here for having a good

time.

Never wondering why I didn't fly.

Now I'm on the right side of the

stage.

I've been waiting so long for something like

this.

Elbow, you gotta help me with Piner.

Can't do it.

Talk to him.

I talked to him.

It didn't help.

He keeps trying to kill himself.

That's because he can't get no tail, Studley.

But I tell you something.

The more tail you get, the more tail

you get.

Now you ought to know that, Studley.

Yes, sir.

Well, the less tail you get, the less

you get.

Now that's true, too.

Amen.

Now Ponder is going downhill.

And he's picking up speed by the minute.

The best just to get out of the

way.

I can't do that.

He's my best friend.

This is bigger than friendship.

This is what you call cosmic.

Really?

Yeah.

The Buddhists call it, let me see, reincarnation.

I thought you were a Baptist.

I figure Ponder was paying for some past

lifetime.

He'd be bad back there.

Maybe a pharaoh.

Maybe he had a harem of a thousand

wives.

A thousand wives?

You know, maybe he was a jackrabbit.

A jackrabbit?

Yeah.

Now that explains it.

In past life, Ponder was a horny little

jackrabbit.

And he got so much rabbit pussy, the

good Lord said, you can't have no more.

That explains it all.

I don't know.

I have never seen anybody try so hard.

Me neither.

But you know what?

That's nature.

And Mother Nature is a beautiful woman.

You know, she'd be the final piece of

ass.

Understand?

Yes, sir.

Leave it be.

That's what you call karma.

Karma?

Karma.

♪♪ ♪♪

♪♪ ♪♪

♪♪ ♪♪

♪♪ ♪♪ So close in time?

What am I doing...

Everything you ever did.

Tell me what to do!

♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪

♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ No, no, no, no,

no!

No, no, no, no!

Who was that?

Trouble.

She's a girl everywhere I go.

I even started dreaming about her.

Hey, forget her.

Forget hell.

Now, that's a woman.

Darling, how the hell am I gonna get

laid?

Drugs.

Women love drugs.

It's like they're nothing.

Don't wanna live.

One of a kind nation.

Money making nation.

Drugs in here.

I've got drugs, I get off drugs.

Hey ladies, drugs.

Women love drugs.

Life's unreal.

Cast of people with thousands.

Something wrong, so I know what I'm doing.

Don't wanna live.

Hope for a day when justice for God

falls.

Chance would be a fine thing now.

Don't wanna live.

So, where am I gonna get a lighter?

One of a kind nation.

Money making nation.

Drugs in here.

It's going right now.

Cool shit.

Don't wanna live.

Why don't we do some pills?

It's not about taking until nothing hurts like

that.

Know what I mean again?

Don't wanna live.

One of a kind nation.

Money making nation.

I need a coke.

Drugs in here.

Money making nation.

Don't wanna live.

Acid.

I got a problem.

Mirror.

Fuck.

I'm out of here with this.

Ladies, up.

It's a hollow day in my head It's

a hollow day in my head Gonna do

a lot in two years Who

are you?

Hondo!

Hondo!

Hondo!

Who's he?

You don't want to know.

Ahhhh!

Love is an illusion, love is a dream.

Life is an illusion, love is the dream.

Life is an illusion, love is a dream.

Life is an illusion, love is the dream.

Everybody's going to be alright.

Alright, what's this for?

Twins.

Do you know how unhappy this one paragraph

makes me?

You know what this is about?

This is about the SALT talks.

You know what the SALT talks are?

Yeah, sure, boss.

Strategic Arms Limitation Treaty.

That's right.

That's very good.

So what they do, they say, well, listen,

we'll get some more missiles.

Moscow has more missiles.

We need more missiles.

So they come up with a new program.

They call it STARD.

You know what STARD is?

Strategic Arms Reduction Talks.

That's very good, too.

But you see, what it really means is,

it's the start of the end.

It's the start of nuclear destruction in this

world as we know it today.

Wait a minute.

I can give you a little audio-visual

aids here.

Now, let's see.

You take this missile here, okay?

This will represent a missile in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.

Okay?

This will be the DEFCON 4 in Colorado.

All right?

Those are yours.

And we'll set up some missiles in Moscow.

I got this one and this one over

here, okay?

Red square right there.

Now, let's say this is the president, okay?

So one day, he comes in the office

after having a bad night.

Hasn't been so good for him, right?

So this prick comes into his office, scratches

his head, and says, I think I'll blow

up the world today.

Leans over, presses the button.

What's that mean?

What does that do?

That launches your missile from Pittsburgh, right?

Go ahead.

Launch it.

Go.

So Moscow sees it coming and says, oh,

Matakonsky's sending a missile.

We got to take care of this.

Russia's really pissed off now, right?

So what they do is they decide to

send a missile of their own, right?

So what they do is they decide to

send a missile of their own, right?

No, okay, we've got a mess here, a

total mess.

But one more thing.

Russia's got a missile they've been keeping up

their sleeve.

They roll it into position.

They launch it, and...

We're fucked.

Scary shit, boss.

Yeah, it's a shame because, you know, I

love America.

America could have been somebody.

America could have been a contender.

I need something to help me with women.

You came to the right place.

Well, sell me something.

I got just the thing here for beginners.

Got a little starter model right here.

What is it?

It's a Vybrid.

I'll take it.

What size do you want?

I want the biggest one you got.

The M5, boss?

The M5.

Yeah.

You don't want that one.

He wants it.

You don't want that one, kid.

I want it.

The M5 sexual device?

You don't want that one, kid.

Yes, he does.

He wants the M5.

The M5's the greatest sexual device ever devised.

I want the M5!

Oh, no, come on.

It's cold out here.

Donora?

Don't go away.

I'll be right back.

This'll be worth it.

No!

Let her rip.

Let her

rip.

May I help you?

I'm here to see the dean.

Really?

Name?

Pandu Sinatra.

Mr. Sinatra is here to see you.

Yes, ma'am.

You can go right in.

Thanks, ma'am.

This thing blocked out the entire campus last

night, Mr. Sinatra.

We have rules at this college, Mr. Libido,

and if you do not abide by those

rules, you'll be out on your ass.

Is that clear?

Yes, ma'am.

You may go.

Absolutely anything is possible.

So, from interstellar communications to the development of

a functioning aphrodisiac.

Now, let us first look...

Uh, Professor Schmidt?

Ja, Herr Sinatra?

What is an aphrodisiac?

The word aphrodisiac comes from the African root,

afro, meaning large penis, and

the Greek, aphrodisiac, which means

want it bad.

Now, class, please repeat after me, aphrodisiac, large

penis, want it bad.

You got it.

Professor?

Ja, ja.

Now, if one wanted to make an aphrodisiac,

what would one do?

One would have to find, you see, that

element which most stimulates the female libido.

Please, Louise.

No, I want to go home.

I've got something for you.

I'll bet you do.

No, it's not what you think.

What is it?

You will never guess.

A hot beef injection?

No.

A trouser worm?

Uh-uh.

What is it?

What's that?

Well, this is, uh, it's, uh, no.

Ah!

Hey!

Ah!

Ah!

Help me!

Do you know

what these are?

No.

Gas pills.

What?

They make you fart.

Make you fart?

Shh.

Now they've done it.

22 years of blue balls and now it's

over.

Santa Lucia.

Santa Lucia.

Sophie.

Stoodley, mamma mia.

Just go out with him.

He's my best friend.

I can't get anyone else on campus to

go out with him.

Yes, Stoodley.

Now, he does not speak Italian.

No, no, no, no.

No Italiano.

He's going to be here at 6 o

'clock.

Yeah, bye.

Swallow.

Just swallow.

Swallow.

That's good.

Amore mio.

Let's take your car.

Scusi.

Ho.

Oh, mamma mia.

Ho Oh mamma mia,

mamma mia.

Oh no.

Vo.

Vo.

Oh, my.

God.

Spaghetti Americano.

Oh, my God.

Don't light a match!

Huh?

Don't light a match!

Huh?

Mr. Sinatra, you leave me no choice.

Your presence at this university can no longer

be tolerated.

God knows what I'm going to tell the

parents of these poor children.

Oh, shit.

Not a pretty sight, is it, Pondo?

Are you pleased with yourself?

Pack your things and get out.

Hey, Pondo.

I heard you got thrown out of school.

Yes, sir.

Well, you don't have to clean up that

mess.

I'll clean it up.

Don't worry about it.

I make a mess.

I'll clean it up.

You got it.

Hi, Holly.

Hi.

Hi, Alex.

What?

Shut up and kiss me.

Ow!

Oh, Holly.

That was wonderful.

I know.

Shit's eating me alive.

Don't bother.

Easy, baby.

Now I'm going to show you the eighth

wonder of the world.

Don't you touch me.

Holly.

What is this shit?

Elbow.

Elbow!

Elbow.

Elbow.

Wait.

Wait.

Wait.

I'll clean it up.

I'll clean it up.

I'll do it.

I'll do it.

It ain't that much fun, Pondo.

No, go on, Elbow.

I'll do it.

I'll clean it up.

Go have a bourbon in the boiling room.

Bye, Elbow.

Go on.

Go on.

You hit.

I got it.

I got it!

I

Got it.

Nothing more Things I've

tried To say Tried this many times Rain.

Falling from my eyes These kind of days.

I really miss you now Seasons will change

again I really miss you now I said

your name I wonder where you are Watching

the rain And it makes me remember Things

I've tried to say No!

Not the whipped cream!

Not the whipped cream!

What happened?

I found it.

You found what?

I'm a party animal.

Yeah, I can see that.

I fell first I couldn't lie Standing straight.

And giving double tries To get up high.

To get up there To get up high.

To get up there To get up high.

To get up there To get up high.

Up there Up there Now it is And

you get it right Today's the first time.

You're gonna learn how to fight Forget about

the sentiments You always feel From now on

all you think about Is kick, kick, kick

I know!

Now I mean what I say Because I'm

your general Say all you know Because I'm

your general I'm the one in charge Because

I'm your general I must be a bizarre.

Six weights, I'm a woman killer.

Six weights?

Yeah, females.

Women.

Girls.

Girls.

Girls are the girls.

The girl is a half a mile away.

Oh, pretty.

Hey!

Girlie!

Over here.

This is the Mount Everest of womanhood.

No sweat.

These girls live behind steel doors.

No sweat!

No man has ever made it to the

third floor of this building.

Suddenly, no sweat!

All right.

I'm gonna get you.

Girlie, I did it.

Au contraire, Pando.

Look.

Pando!

Pando!

Pando!

Go.

Reality's a dream I gave it, which I

seem to never find out Just what I

am, I don't know if I'm an actor,

a hero, a shaman, a sham But if

you don't mind If you don't mind I'm

lost without a clue So how can I

undo The tangle of these waves?

I keep grieving I don't know if I

should I keep believing This emptiness is endless.

But if you don't mind If you don't

mind I used to bet that you didn't

care But girl, they never got me anywhere.

Each time I used to feel so sure.

Something about you made me doubt you more.

Can you convince me What everything I see

just makes me feel That's my Pando!

Oh!

And stop!

Pando, I am so proud of you.

We gotta get you back in school.

I gotta see Nadine.

She's busy.

New in town, sailor.

I've got a headache.

You need to relax.

No, you need to relax.

Be calm.

Take a deep breath.

See these fingers?

They work wonders.

This won't hurt a bit.

I promise.

Oh, no, no, no, you don't.

No, wait!

Oh, my God, I think I'm in love!

Dean Fox?

You are not Dean Fox.

No, honey, I'm the new Dean.

Ooh-wee!

Look what the gods done sent me!

Aah!

1925.

Dr. Bob Stern discovered this.

He believed that this was some sort of

symbol For, oh, people who would go into

the cave And tell them how to get

out Because he himself had gotten lost At

this point in time Telling people to travel

northward Would you knock it off?

There was a map of some sort, the.

Stern map.

We call this the Stern map.

They used this at NASA To get the

spaceships from Earth to the moon and back.

Without this, uh...

Pando, take me!

Aah!

Aah!

Aah!

Aah!

Studley, I don't know if I like this

anymore.

Pando, this is every man's dream.

I'm scared and I'm tired.

Go away!

Scared of what?

Every woman I see wants me.

That's wonderful.

No, it's terrible, Studley.

I have been greedy.

I'm like king Midas.

Everything I touch turns to poontang.

What?

What is this?

All this fuss, this commotion?

Over who?

Over Pando?

Of course, in the total scope of things,

He wasn't asking for very much.

He just wanted to get himself a little,

that's all.

Aah!

No!

Oh, Pando.

For a white boy, he did all right.

Pando?

So why Can't I touch this?

So why Can't I touch this?

And it looks so real I can see

it And it feels so real I can

feel it And it tastes so real I

can taste it And it sounds so real

I can hear it So why Can't I

touch this?

So why Can't I touch this?

And it looks so real I can feel

it And it feels so real I can

taste it And it tastes so real I

can hear it And it sounds so real

I can see it So why So why.

Can't I touch this?

So why Can't I touch this?

And it looks so

real I can feel it I can't see

it And it feels so real I can

feel it