All language subtitles for oodaat402

The Pop Original Series.

It's so nice to meet all of you. Thank
you for taking me to dinner, Miss

Alvarez. Well, it's not every day that
Alex gets a new girlfriend. And even

though that day was four weeks ago, it's
nice to finally meet you.

I'm sorry. I don't know what I was
worried about.

Sir.

Nora.

How did you meet my papito?

It's actually a really funny story.

See, Alex is at his locker, and I come
up and said, cool sneakers.

And then I said... And we've been
together ever since.

God, it's so easy being straight.

Has he said he loves you?

No. Oh.

He has said it to me.

Okay, Elena's gay, Alex is a catch, and
you are making everyone uncomfortable.

So here, let's look at the...

because we have to order before six
o'clock to get happy hour prices.

Waiter, we're ready. I'll have the
sliders.

Mommy?

I'll have the pot stickers, unless they
have actual potty in them.

The chronic does not agree with me.

You're good.

And for you?

about the almond-crusted salmon salad.

How is the salmon raised?

It's raised in price after 6 o'clock.

This is it.

One day at a time.

And then my abuelo said, en esta casa no
hay fanaticos de los Red Sox.

I do not care if Alex hasn't said it. I
will. I love you.

Yeah. And I usually only say this to
whatever mirrors closest to me, but

you're a freaking delight.

And it's so nice to finally have a young
Latina around who speaks Spanish.

I speak Spanish. I'm young.

Mom, I meant to ask, can I borrow the
car tomorrow so I can go see the

Overwatch League Finals? Por favor.

You mean that thing where you watch
nerds play video games?

Joke's on you. Nerds isn't an insult
anymore.

It's not a compliment.

Anyway, my two favorite teams are
playing, the LA Gladiators and the

Shanghai Dragons.

Yes, you can take the car to the match
as long as you promise not to tell me

about it after.

And if you drop everyone else off for
their errands first.

The Overwatch League finals and I get to
make an itinerary?

Did this just turn into the best weekend
ever?

She wasn't joking.

Okay, we got the check.

Don't freak out.

Okay, you know the words, don't freak
out, usually make me freak out and cost

me money.

Thank you again for taking me to dinner,
Miss Alvarez.

I was super nervous to meet you, but you
guys are fun.

Are you kidding me?

Excuse me.

Excuse me. A couple of these items were
charged at full price and not happy hour

price. Oh, yeah, I put those in after 6
o'clock.

Okay, but we ordered them before 6
o'clock.

Oh, yeah, but it goes by when they're
entered into the system, so... What's

this?

I mean, are you some genie and this
magically makes me a millionaire

that can afford full-price pot stickers?

This is happy hour!

It seems real happy.

She's not usually like this. No, that's
true. She's always like this.

Okay, you know what?

I want to speak to the manager.

I am the manager.

Oh, really?

Mm-hmm. The server is the manager? Yep.
Oh, really?

Do you think it's my first time
complaining in a restaurant?

I definitely do not.

Whatever, I'll take off the charge. Oh,
good!

and you can use my last two wishes to
conjure up a better attitude and a

freaking apology.

You were so lovely to meet you, Nora.

I can't believe you embarrassed me in
front of Nora like that for $13 and a

brownie that the waiter definitely spit
on.

So what, you want to impress her by
making her think you're some big shot

who doesn't care about money?

No. I want to impress her by making her
think I don't have a crazy mother.

Ooh, well, now you're just not being
realistic.

If Nora breaks up with us over this, I
will never forgive you.

Everybody relax.

I was fine.

Fine? Yeah.

I know it's good to save money.

But maybe the first time meeting my
girlfriend isn't the right time to

threaten to burn this mother down.

furniture i'm trying to fix your janky
couch because someone's too cheap to buy

a new one it's you come on pen you're
making that sweet nurse practitioner

money now yeah but i still have to be
careful how i spend it you know it

starts with full price pot stickers next
thing you know you're living in a

cardboard box making soup out of
cigarette butts that seems a little

extreme you don't know what i know you
think Hammer thought he was going to go

broke? He had the biggest pants, and now
he's got nothing to put in them.

Penn, you have what's called a scarcity
mindset.

Even though you have money now, you
don't act like it. Oh, so I should act

like you?

Hi, I'm Schneider.

I wipe my butt with $100 bills.

That is a hurtful rich person
stereotype. I have a custom marble

bidet.

Well, can you use it on your mouth
because there's a lot of... coming out

of there.

I'm telling you, Penn, you need to
change your relationship with money.

Spend it on something. Treat yourself.

Like, finally get a new couch.

Why? This one is fine.

Fine?

It's covered in rips, lumps, and this.

That's just a little leak.

Couches are not hooked up to plumbing.

Penn, Your sofa is crying.

Okay, I've got our itinerary all planned
out. First, Alex, I will drop you off so

you can buy your stupid sneakers.

Then, I will drop Abuelita off at the
fish market and get to the Overwatch

finals before the first gladiator is
fragged.

Ay, por favor.

None of those nerds is getting fragged.

Anyways. I need to be dropped at the
fish market first before all of the

Cuban crabs are gone.

Cuban crabs?

The strongest ones claw their way to the
top, so they're the first to go.

Those are the Cuban crabs.

I can't drop you off before Alex. I just
got my license, so I'm not allowed to

drive anyone under 20 unless an adult is
present.

Does it have to be me?

No, any adult who can sit there and do
nothing.

Pete Biller or a flash bag.

I don't know the person.

They said staring at the phone doesn't
make it ring.

May have taken 20 years, but it proved
them all wrong.

It's a perfect Sunday.

It's me, the TV, and my boyfriend,
Chester Cheetah.

What's up, girl?

I'm about to get all up in your mouth.

Mother!

That's not good.

Has it hit me yet?

I don't know.

Who knows what the day will bring. Oh,
my God. What have we done?

Why has it ended?

Mom?

It's Dad.

You gave them your bathtub. Don't give
them your cookies.

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All right, okay, all right. I know I
agreed, but I thought about it, and I

don't need a new sofa.

It broke in half, Penn.

Yeah. Now I got two love seats.

Come on. You can afford it. It's going
to be okay.

Will it?

Then why am I sweating like a couch?

They're not supposed to be wet.

Trust me. I know you don't like to spend
money frivolously, so I did a ton of

research about where we should go, and I
made sure to pick the store with the

funniest name.

Welcome to Topa. So good.

So good.

Can I just let you off here?

If you stop first.

Fine.

All right.

This is working. I'm going to make it to
the Overwatch League.

I love it when a plan comes together.

Oh, my God, right. You're still here.

Um,

at least now we can use the carpool
lane.

Yes, flesh bag to the rescue.

Your grandmother told me about my new
nickname.

I'm fine with it.

Okay. Um, so when we get there, you can
just hang out in the car.

Well, actually, I was hoping to join you
for the match.

Do you know anything about esports?

Do you know anything about loneliness?

All right, let's do this!

Hello?

I need to be picked up. It is an
emergency.

What? I told the bus driver I have a
huge case of crap, and he just drove

away.

It's okay. He's not going to hurt you.

He's friendly.

Okay, good. So which one do you want to
take home?

Can I help you find something?

I am definitely not ready for you, Sean.

Hey, Penn, how about this one?

Oh, yeah.

Come on in. The leather is warm.

I'm not getting a black leather couch.
I'm not a movie producer from the 90s.

I was.

You see?

Sean lost all his money.

Thanks for that trip down memory lane.

Come on, Penn.

Just try sitting on one of these.

Ugh.

My butt likes this one.

Your butt has very good taste.

And check this out.

No, but don't do that. Oh, no, no, don't
worry. See, the soap is treated with

Spilgard, and the liquid just pools
harmlessly on it. Yeah, but you wasted a

perfectly good soda.

Just picture it, Penn.

Our family sitting on this couch juntos.

Hey, Penn, will you pass me the remote?

No, Schneider, get the hell out of my
apartment.

This feels right.

Oh, yeah, that's pricey, but I...

I think I can swing it. Yes.

Terrific. Now, a lot of people get the
sofa bed option just in case you want to

have a gift over. Yes, we want that. No,
we definitely do not want that.

Okay. Would you like to open a store
credit card? Does it have zero interest?

Because I do.

You did it. I did it. You bought a new
couch. How do you feel?

Guess we'll take that rug, too.

Maybe I can still take the bus and tell
the driver these are emotional support

traps.

Forget it. I am not stopping again for
anything.

Noah!

What do you mean you decided not to buy
the shoes?

Shoes? Or your entire personality?

Okay, I thought about it, and I realized
these ones are what brought me and Noah

together.

I couldn't replace them.

Oh, que romantico.

I also can't replace my shoes, mostly
because I have a condition called raptor

foot.

I'm very hard to fit.

Anyway, you just dropped me off at home.

No, I've already missed the first two
matches.

And we're almost at the arena, so we're
all going.

Great, the parking lot's full.

Well, you just parked somewhere else.

Yeah, like at home.

I'm not going to miss the final.

There's nothing waiting for me except
darkness. Let's do this!

All right, I'm getting that spot.

Hard on!

If these are emotional support crabs...

what I say to my bidet.

Feels good to spend a little coin, huh?

I know.

I did. I did it. I made peace with
money.

I'm good.

We're good.

We're more than good. We're lovers. Now
leave us.

Okay.

So I did what you asked and I put the
old couch out on the curb, but doesn't

it really belong in the Alvarez Museum?

The Alvarez Museum is just a couple of
awards and knickknacks in the hallway.

Oh, right.

It's definitely not a collection of
memorabilia from your family that I set

up in an empty apartment on the sixth
floor called the Alvarez Museum Norte.

Okay, I am too happy to be creeped out.

I love this couch. I love it. I had the
best nap of my life. And look, my drool

just wipes right off.

See? Spending a little money didn't set
off a chain of events that led to some

doomsday scenario.

Okay, don't freak out.

There was a big storm last night, and
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Oh, my God. To where? Bob's garage?

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You gave them your bathtub. Don't give
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It's judgment day.

Backseat chefs peer inside your oven.
But you've cleaned off all the baked-on

business from meals past with Easy Off.
So the only thing they see is that

beautiful bird.

Go ahead. Let them judge.

Let me know if you ready to get dollars
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Get out.

Don't freak out.

I don't need this today. I already
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Maybe you should sit down.

Whoa, love the new couch.

Must have been really expensive.

You're not helping.

What happened?

First of all, as you can see, everyone's
okay.

Except maybe Dr. B.

It was exhilarating to watch athletes
with the same body type as me.

Shields up.

Shields up.

That's the L.A. Gladiators slogan.

I stand them.

Just tell me what happened.

I got nachos. Not you.

When we finally got to the game, the
parking lot was full, so I parked on the

street. And it's important to know that
at this point in the story, we were

ahead $8.

And then?

And then... While we were in the game,
the car was broken into and the window

was smashed.

Which is probably how the pigeon got in.

I don't know what he ate, but it did not
agree with him.

Anyway, we chased the pigeon away, but
we probably should have closed the car

door first because it got hit by a
scooter.

What? No, no, no, no. Don't worry. The
guy's fine.

I know because he got up and scooted
away.

Unfortunately, the car door kind of
chased him.

So just to recap, I saved us $8 and some
other stuff happened.

Shields up.

It's only money.

What?

Yes, I did this.

I'm so glad you're not mad because I was
a little worried because I left my

laptop on the seat and that's probably
why they broke in.

You left your laptop in the car?

It's only money?

How many times have I told you not to
leave valuable stuff visible in the car?

I know, I know. I made a mistake.

Yeah, you did. A really dumb one.

How can someone so smart do something so
stupid?

We'll talk about this later.

This is why I took my crabs into the
nerd show.

Although, after six hours...

I don't think we should eat them
anymore.

Hey.

Hey.

So listen, I'm sorry I got so upset.

But I need you to understand where I'm
coming from.

Manny and I have never had a great
relationship.

You know how Abuelita lives with us?

Well, for a while there, we lived with
her. Because when your papi left, I

couldn't afford the rent.

I mean, so, like, we're good now, but
those feelings, they don't just go away.

Because you're always one catastrophe
away from being broke.

But I know I need to loosen up and know
that $13 potstickers is not a

catastrophe.

It's a ripoff.

But it's not a catastrophe.

And neither is this.

You're right.

I have a plan to pay for everything. I
can sell my hair or my blood or my eggs

because they're still young and fresh.
Okay, well, don't give away my

grandchildren.

Okay, but I can't use all the money I
have saved.

You have money saved?

Yeah. I've had a system since I started
working as Schneider's assistant.

For every dollar I spend, I put two into
savings.

Really? I didn't know you were so good
with money.

I'm trying.

I can show you. I track all of my
spendings and savings on this

spreadsheet.

It was on my laptop.

It's okay.

We have insurance.

And we'll figure the rest out.

Okay. But I'm going to work a bunch of
extra shifts for Schneider so I can help

pay for that new computer.

Yeah, that's what I mean by we'll figure
the rest out.

But I am proud of you.

Hearing all this makes you feel like
I've done something right.

Yeah, well, I learned from the master.

You've had the same Ziploc since I was a
kid.

You replaced the zipper like five times.

That was your great-grandmother's
Ziploc.

And one day you'll pass it on to your
kid.

In this moment, I'll pretend I'm going
to have kids. Well, thank you, baby.

Thank you.

Mind if we join you?

Siéntate.

just me, or does the new couch make our
TV seem smaller?

Well, if we're buying a new TV, we're
gonna need to splurge on surround sound.

And a state of the art soft pretzel
carousel.

Look at that.

Mommy's ears just beat and roll right
off.

Someone opened the door that they
shouldn't. He walked in on Alex. He

walked in on me.

Alex, we need to talk. Do you want
something to eat?

Too soon, Mom.

One day at a time. All new next Tuesday
at 9.30.

Bully on Pop.