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[Music]
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simple game Jake you just kicked the
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ball into the net I did yeah right into
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the other team's net well I got confused
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because you were yelling at me I was
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yelling wrong net wrong net wrong net
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guys guys Co it you didn't even let us
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have our fruit rollups and Juice you're
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the worst coach ever yeah well you
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probably would have kicked the snacks
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into the other team's mouth
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fan look mom just got back from the
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doctor's office and her blood pressure
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is like super high she cannot have any
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stress keep your voice down that kid is
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an embarrassment do you hear what I'm
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saying stop
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[Laughter]
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yelling shine didn't I just tell you I
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need peace and quiet yeah shine what's
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wrong with
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you sorry M I know that you need to
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relax how about you have a nice hot bath
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okay I'm going to go up and take my bath
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and while I'm in there I'm going to
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listen to the relaxation sounds that my
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doctor put on my little iPod here oh I
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listened to one of those once that was
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the sounds of a very calming rainstorm I
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fell asleep and then I peed
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myself life is good life is calm
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and relax one two happy happy three four
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all is
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great are planted in the past my life is
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changing fast who I am is who I want to
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be a single mom who works too hard who
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loves her kids who never stops with
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gentle hands and the Heart of a
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figh I'm a
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[Music]
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surv I'm all tense from that soccer game
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hey how about we go upstairs and you
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give me a back rub van you know that
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always leads to something yeah I know
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why you want to skip the backr
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[Music]
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what is an orange Manatee doing in my
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shower oh yeah I knew there was
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something I was supposed to tell you
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dad's in your shower well then call
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SeaWorld he's going
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back Mr H has been staying in the garage
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for the past few days the only way he's
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staying in the garage is if a car is
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running here Rea sorry about that bet
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that brought back some memories though
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huh almost brought back my
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lunch a come on the old Fell's age
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pretty well don't you think yeah that's
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what happens when you soak something in
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[Applause]
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alcohol come on Chey and let's go you
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know I'm not giving you a backrub don't
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worry the urge has
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passed so is it true you're living in my
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garage yeah I been sleeping on the
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pullout couch Barbara Jean and I are
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taking a little break she thinks I'm on
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a business trip why don't you stay at a
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hotel well if I stay at a hotel that
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makes it real this way we can have a
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little break without it being such an
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official separation why don't you just
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admit that you're
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cheap I am not cheap I just don't happen
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to believe that a room service waiter
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automatically deserves
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12% look Rea really things are bad with
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Barbara Jean and me but I'm trying I am
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really I am come on let me stay in the
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garage just a couple of more days please
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Brock I am under strict orders to keep
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my blood pressure at a minimum and
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you're not helping one
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bit Jake nice kick next time try to hit
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the
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ball the
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ball the the black and white never
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mind re Rea remember I'm out of town hey
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hey Barb je Brock's out of town and
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Henry's staying with Nana so I got bored
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and I baked you a cake happy Tuesday
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Reba it's
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Wednesday happy
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Reba so Brock's out of town huh yeah
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Reba can I confide in you is it
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something embarrassing and personal
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about Brock yes
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yes it's just he is just such a big baby
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you know every time we have a little
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problem he goes on a business trip I
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mean the guy's a dentist there are
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plenty of rotten teeth in
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Houston you know I'd say he's been
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hanging out at hotels you know except
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he's so
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cheap so tell me more about his
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cheapness I mean I could go on forever
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the guy once tried to buy half a box of
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Girl Scout
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cookies yeah he's cheap and vain too huh
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yeah he is yeah one time I caught him
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looking at himself in the mirror and he
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was saying enough about you let's talk
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about
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me well hang in there barar Jean for my
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experience you just never know when
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Brock might pop up you know what's weird
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weben
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he's not even in town and I can still
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smell
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him it's like this weird mixture of
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cocoa butter and
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[Music]
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feet wow man that's amazing thanks
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[Applause]
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what are you doing I'm trying to think
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of a way to fix my team and being a
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brilliant coach I did I have come up
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with a plan that is going to change
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their entire attitude and turn us from
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losers into
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winners what's the plan I'm cutting Jake
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from the team what no van you cannot cut
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Jake from the team I have to his rotten
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attitude is infecting the entire team he
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is the Terrell Owens of pre-teen
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soccer he's also a member of your family
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not by
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Blood Cheyenne when we have our son that
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kid will be athletic and have awesome
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eyebrows like his
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dad he will be well and
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[Applause]
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brow van what do you think Mom's going
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to say when Jake tells her that you cut
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him from the team Cheyenne I can't coach
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constantly worrying about the
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owner hey buddy I think we need to talk
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yeah we do Cheyenne this is official
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team business so thank you thank you
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thank
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you Jake look I'm just going to come
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right out with it cuz we're both adults
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well you're not an adult but let's
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pretend you are and just get on with it
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okay okay okay you're fired
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what' you say I said you're
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[Laughter]
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fired uh Jake you you you can't fire me
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it's not just me it's the whole team
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what are you stupid kids
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crazy the parents won't stand for this
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it was the parents idea oh so it's a
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coup huh huh some psycho dad took my
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coaching job who is it it's not a dad oh
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man is it one of Jimmy's two moms
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it's not a parent then who is
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it hey man tough
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break fine you can take my team you can
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take my job but you can never ever take
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my dignity
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[Music]
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what are you doing oh I was just uh
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getting a blanket out of the closet yeah
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the garage only gets so warm even with
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the dryer open and
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running you know how to make it
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warmer turn on the
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car or you could go home to your house
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you know what Rea this is way more
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complicated than you think okay then
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I'll make it simple for you go home to
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your wife I can't she thinks I'm out of
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town W you just tell her the truth you
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know
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Reva I'm one of those people who
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actually believes that the truth
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imprisons
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you plus no matter what I say to Barbara
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gen it causes a fight then just be with
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her don't
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speak not a bad rule of thumb for you by
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the
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way you know you do smell like cocoa
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butter and feet
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[Music]
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Rea open
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up no Brock go home to your wife I did I
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need your help oh my gosh what is
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it she shot me
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[Music]
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oh my gosh did you call the doctor did
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you call 911 no no no she shot me with a
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paintball gun oh and it hurts like hell
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I'm going to have a big boo boo
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tomorrow call the cops there was an
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intruder at our house that was me you
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what are you doing here I thought you
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were out of
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town I switched my flight from Austin so
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I could come back and check on you I
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didn't even care about the extra cost
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and believe me it was
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substantial
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Austin you said you were in
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Dallas I got a connecting flight from
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Austin a connecting flight from
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Dallas that's a 45 minute flight from
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here to there why would you
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connect why connect why connect why not
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connect
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okay what is going on here what is going
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on here what is going on what is going
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on here okay re you think you can help
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me out can I help you out oh God Bless
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America somebody start
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talking okay Brock I think it's time you
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use the t word yes yes T everybody loves
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a nice hot cup of tea okay who takes
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honey BR tell her the truth fine
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I wasn't in Austin I've been staying in
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Reba's
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garage well isn't that cozy every time
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something goes bad you go run into to
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your ex-wife and you I mean is that why
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you wouldn't let me stay in your garage
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you had your little jiggalo stash
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there oh yeah Barbara Jean every night I
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dream about waking up in the arms of my
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manate again
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well don't I feel like an idiot Barbera
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Jean no Brock and next time I got 200
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rounds and I'm aiming
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low that one
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will looks like you're stuck with me for
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another couple of day no no more no you
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have to go talk to her from your heart
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tell her what your feeling I'm a guy I
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don't know what I'm
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feeling then talk to her tell her that
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and then you could start mending all the
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things that are wrong Rock if we' have
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done that maybe we would have had a
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chance I don't know re I think maybe I
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should stay here one more
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night Brock
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honey the gun I own doesn't shoot
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paint come on make my day
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Kira as the coach Kira I mean what's her
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philosophy of sports hey kids soccer is
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important but life itself is
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meaningless that was the greatest game
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ever oh my gosh you guys won nope we got
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murdered 11 to nothing I think it was 13
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Coach 13 to nothing in soccer how many
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did you score for him two that's how I
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got sned act from both
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teams Kira you can't let them lose like
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that those psycho parents will tear to
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Pieces thanks for the advice oh uh tell
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Mom I won't be home for dinner cuz some
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of those psycho parents want to take me
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out for
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sushi you see that she's turned them
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from losers into Happy
277
00:14:25,720 --> 00:14:32,120
losers man they're kids and May maybe
278
00:14:29,519 --> 00:14:33,839
your coaching style is a little too
279
00:14:32,120 --> 00:14:35,959
intense oh that's ridiculous you know
280
00:14:33,839 --> 00:14:38,240
what when we have our son that's when I
281
00:14:35,959 --> 00:14:39,800
need to coach well maybe your coaching
282
00:14:38,240 --> 00:14:43,759
style is a little too intense for our
283
00:14:39,800 --> 00:14:43,759
son too why do you keep saying I'm too
284
00:14:45,000 --> 00:14:51,320
intense I want to show you something
285
00:14:47,279 --> 00:14:54,199
okay I taped the game from last
286
00:14:51,320 --> 00:14:59,519
week here we go here we go get it going
287
00:14:54,199 --> 00:15:04,759
get it going no no no no no no no no no
288
00:14:59,519 --> 00:15:08,240
come on baby k k k k k
289
00:15:04,759 --> 00:15:08,240
k what are you
290
00:15:09,120 --> 00:15:16,440
doing what do you think this this A
291
00:15:11,600 --> 00:15:16,440
blank Adventure what are you doing pal
292
00:15:18,810 --> 00:15:22,790
[Applause]
293
00:15:45,160 --> 00:15:53,360
a
294
00:15:47,880 --> 00:15:53,360
wow yeah yeah that's a little bit
295
00:15:55,120 --> 00:16:01,759
much it's weird that's my father nope no
296
00:15:59,399 --> 00:16:04,399
I I had the camera it was
297
00:16:01,759 --> 00:16:06,199
you no I know it's me but that the way I
298
00:16:04,399 --> 00:16:09,680
was acting that's my father that's the
299
00:16:06,199 --> 00:16:12,399
way my dad coached me my whole life oh
300
00:16:09,680 --> 00:16:14,759
man that's so sad that's not sad that's
301
00:16:12,399 --> 00:16:18,160
why I'm so good at
302
00:16:14,759 --> 00:16:20,000
sports yeah and it also is probably why
303
00:16:18,160 --> 00:16:23,600
you know probably why what well why you
304
00:16:20,000 --> 00:16:26,519
hate your dad I don't hate my dad I just
305
00:16:23,600 --> 00:16:28,600
you know I don't I don't talk to him or
306
00:16:26,519 --> 00:16:31,279
call him or think about him oh my gosh I
307
00:16:28,600 --> 00:16:32,720
hate my my dad and now I'm turning into
308
00:16:31,279 --> 00:16:36,560
him Cheyenne I don't want my will and
309
00:16:32,720 --> 00:16:37,959
brow son to hate me calm down he's not
310
00:16:36,560 --> 00:16:41,519
going to hate
311
00:16:37,959 --> 00:16:43,800
you he's going to love you okay because
312
00:16:41,519 --> 00:16:46,160
no matter whether he's good or bad at
313
00:16:43,800 --> 00:16:48,680
anything we are always going to be good
314
00:16:46,160 --> 00:16:51,920
at loving him
315
00:16:48,680 --> 00:16:53,800
okay okay and you're not going to coach
316
00:16:51,920 --> 00:16:56,279
any of his
317
00:16:53,800 --> 00:16:58,360
games I can't believe I didn't realize
318
00:16:56,279 --> 00:17:01,000
it I was turning into my dad when did
319
00:16:58,360 --> 00:17:04,640
you realize you were turned into your
320
00:17:01,000 --> 00:17:06,480
mom well no never because I'm not
321
00:17:04,640 --> 00:17:08,640
turning into my mom no I know you
322
00:17:06,480 --> 00:17:11,520
already
323
00:17:08,640 --> 00:17:14,600
did okay you know what I am not turning
324
00:17:11,520 --> 00:17:19,120
into my mom you
325
00:17:14,600 --> 00:17:19,120
do you realize what you just
326
00:17:19,880 --> 00:17:23,880
said crap
327
00:17:27,520 --> 00:17:30,740
[Music]
328
00:17:31,120 --> 00:17:36,720
by a crossbow oh I did I did a small one
329
00:17:34,720 --> 00:17:40,600
oh hey
330
00:17:36,720 --> 00:17:43,280
REO well look at you too new bullet
331
00:17:40,600 --> 00:17:45,679
holes or fresh paint well you know it
332
00:17:43,280 --> 00:17:49,039
wasn't really comfortable being honest
333
00:17:45,679 --> 00:17:51,679
with each other but it really did work
334
00:17:49,039 --> 00:17:53,559
we just needed to talk things out yeah
335
00:17:51,679 --> 00:17:55,520
and we did we did we stayed up all night
336
00:17:53,559 --> 00:17:58,200
and we put all of our problems on the
337
00:17:55,520 --> 00:17:59,559
table we were completely truthful and
338
00:17:58,200 --> 00:18:02,159
you were right
339
00:17:59,559 --> 00:18:04,880
it did set us free well I hate to say it
340
00:18:02,159 --> 00:18:06,960
but when I'm right I'm right and even
341
00:18:04,880 --> 00:18:09,559
when I'm kind of wrong I'm still kind of
342
00:18:06,960 --> 00:18:13,679
right well this time you were right
343
00:18:09,559 --> 00:18:13,679
right good we're getting a
344
00:18:14,159 --> 00:18:20,039
divorce thanks for making us
345
00:18:17,320 --> 00:18:22,400
talk that's not what I meant when I said
346
00:18:20,039 --> 00:18:24,039
the talk I meant work it out yeah well
347
00:18:22,400 --> 00:18:25,320
look we're not thrilled about this
348
00:18:24,039 --> 00:18:27,760
either but it seemed like it was the
349
00:18:25,320 --> 00:18:29,880
only thing we could do to stop the pain
350
00:18:27,760 --> 00:18:32,679
yeah it didn't used to be like like this
351
00:18:29,880 --> 00:18:34,520
we used to have fun we were just
352
00:18:32,679 --> 00:18:36,960
reminiscing about all that and you know
353
00:18:34,520 --> 00:18:39,200
all the good times we had
354
00:18:36,960 --> 00:18:42,240
and you know I
355
00:18:39,200 --> 00:18:44,440
just I really think it's for the best
356
00:18:42,240 --> 00:18:48,280
you know and I couldn't be
357
00:18:44,440 --> 00:18:48,280
happier I can't wait for
358
00:18:54,240 --> 00:18:59,559
court Brock you can't let this happen
359
00:18:57,440 --> 00:19:02,080
you know what
360
00:18:59,559 --> 00:19:04,520
I'm going to go check into a
361
00:19:02,080 --> 00:19:05,320
hotel I I really do think this is for
362
00:19:04,520 --> 00:19:07,400
the
363
00:19:05,320 --> 00:19:08,720
best you're not such a great liar
364
00:19:07,400 --> 00:19:10,919
anymore
365
00:19:08,720 --> 00:19:13,910
Brock yeah I
366
00:19:10,919 --> 00:19:23,920
know I miss those
367
00:19:13,910 --> 00:19:23,920
[Music]
368
00:19:25,440 --> 00:19:30,320
days now I'm never going to be able to
369
00:19:27,559 --> 00:19:31,720
relax
370
00:19:30,320 --> 00:19:34,600
oh
371
00:19:31,720 --> 00:19:37,919
well here we go here we go get it going
372
00:19:34,600 --> 00:19:42,440
get it going no no no no no no no no
373
00:19:37,919 --> 00:19:42,440
no come on baby what are you
374
00:19:43,480 --> 00:19:48,559
doing you think this this a blind
375
00:19:46,159 --> 00:19:50,200
convention what are you doing pal
376
00:19:48,559 --> 00:19:53,520
everything you do is to whistle a little
377
00:19:50,200 --> 00:19:53,520
bit go
378
00:20:09,360 --> 00:20:15,049
[Laughter]
379
00:20:11,890 --> 00:20:15,049
[Music]
380
00:20:17,720 --> 00:20:21,280
now I'm really relaxed
25189
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