All language subtitles for 063 -

Hey, remember when I said we could save
money for Kira's college fund by growing

our own food?

Well, crops are in.

Well, that is amazing.

You spent months planting and weeding
and fertilizing, and next thing you

know, you've almost got a carrot.

Good morning, neighbors.

So, Kira, you ready to hit the mall?
Yeah, but before we go, I need you to

sign this permission slip for a school
field trip. Sure.

This is to get your navel pierced.

Cool. I thought we were going to the
science center.

All right.

Man, I got to start reading those
things.

Okay, I'm going to go up and change,
then we'll go. Why don't you just wear

that?

My old gardening shirt?

Oh, shoot.

I've patched this thing a hundred times.

Only wear it to scare the crows away.

I never thought I'd say this, but what
you're wearing is actually cool.

Wait.

Are you saying I'm cool?

I'm saying your shirt is cool.

Kira's right.

Patchwork is the new silk.

I want to be cool.

I wish I'd save my old rags and patch
them onto a shirt.

I'll give you $20 for that shirt.

Oh, don't be ridiculous, Barbara Jean.
I'm not going to sell you the shirt off

my back.

Okay, I get it.

$30. No way. $40.

$60. $65. Sold. Yeah!

It's the planet in the past. Though my
life is changing fast.

Who I am is who I want to be.

A single mom who works too hard. Who
loves her kids and never stops.

With gentle hands and the heart of a
fighter.

I bet you're in a good mood. I got you a
fudge-covered apple.

Wow.

This looks like an apology apple.

What'd you do?

Nothing.

Yet.

Hey, you know how when we're going
somewhere and you get all mad because

you're waiting for me because I'm doing
my hair?

Well, those days are over.

Because all the guys on the football
team are shaving their heads.

You want to shave your head? If that's
what it takes to make you happy.

Forget it, Van. You know how I freaked
when you got that perm?

Which... We don't talk about the perm.

Look, it's for work. And if I don't do
it because my wife won't let me, all the

guys will make fun of me. This isn't
like high school taunting, okay? They're

pro football players. They're clever.

Mom, Van wants to shave his head.

For business purposes.

Why don't you practice by mowing the
lawn?

I absolutely forbid you to do this. End
of discussion.

But all the guys are doing it. I can't
be the only one with soft, wavy brown

hair.

Well, whatever you do, don't get another
one of those perms.

So, Reba, I got good news.

What? Brock came to his senses about
quitting his job to play golf?

I have not come to my senses, Reba, and
I never will.

So, you remember that shirt that you
sold me? No refund.

No, I showed it to a friend who took it
to a guy that he works with, and he said

that he thinks he could sell those
shirts.

We're going to be rich. Sure, we're
going to be rich. And Brock's going to

be Tiger Woods at the Fat Chance Desert
Classic.

Reba, I'm serious. We should do this.

You know, a lot of people make money
selling things they make. And a lot of

people lose money by selling things they
make. Yeah, but you don't hear about

those people.

Well, maybe you got a point.

Maybe you'll be one of the lucky ones.

So, um, you don't mind if I kind of take
this and run with it?

Hmm. Barbara Jean, you can run with this
idea. You can run with scissors.

You can run with the bad crowd, just so
long as you run.

Because everyone else is?

Jeez.

It's okay to do something just because
everyone else is doing it?

Yeah.

To be cool.

Thanks.

Hey, Tiki, where are you going?

Graveyard.

Hi, honey.

You look really pretty.

I know, but you're still not shaving
your head. Why do we always have to

fight about stuff, huh?

I mean, I think the world would be a
better place if people with opposing

views would just agree.

Oh, very mature. Listen, what I'm trying
to say is... Cut it out.

Ah, the round table.

Kira, don't you think Bam would look
stupid if he shaved his head?

Yeah, but are we going to list all the
ways that he would look stupid? Because

I've only got a few years until college.

Look, everybody's doing it to show
unity, all right? To show we're all on

the same team.

Oh, jeez.

If only there were a way to do that with
matching jerseys.

I can't talk to you.

Van, do you mind if I speak for you?

Yeah.

No.

I don't know. What?

Van's trying to say that playing on a
team involves complex group dynamics,

and seemingly self-destructive acts are
actually initiation rites that foster

camaraderie. Didn't I just say that?

Look, I know it's dumb. So what? It was
dumb when my high school team dressed in

drag on game day. You didn't say
anything about that then.

Huh. That's the first time I heard those
were game days.

Look, this is important to me, okay?
Right now, I'm the new guy.

Rookie. I just want to feel like I
belong.

But I don't want you to do it. Why not?
Just because. Well, that's not good

enough. Well, it used to be.

You don't even care what I think. You
just want me to agree with the decision

that you've already made.

Yes. Thank you for understanding.

You know what?

Do whatever you want. I don't care.

You were the prettiest on game days.

I thought so, too.

Good news, Reba.

I shot a two under par.

I hit a seven iron on 18. Tap in for
birdie. Oh, that's terrific, Brock.

Go in the kitchen and get yourself a
cookie.

Oh, good, Brock. You're here.

I have excellent news.

Can it top how Brock killed seven
birdies with his 18 wood?

Well, good job, honey.

And I bet you're going to be proud of
me, too.

Three.

So much he ordered a hundred of them to
sell in stores all over town.

This is just a deposit.

That's great, honey. Isn't that great,
Reba? Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. And he said that this is
just the first order. He said that he

can see all of Houston wearing these
shirts. And after that, all of Texas.

And after that, he didn't say.

But if he did, I bet he would have said
America.

Wow. This is just like me with golf.
Yeah.

Except I got a big fat check.

No, I meant you have a lot of potential.
Oh, I do.

And I have a big fat check.

Wow, this is something.

So that guy said that my shirts could
sell like that?

Well, you know, he didn't mention you,
but yes.

Wow, that's great.

So fork over my $150.

Why would I do that? Because it's my
shirt.

My design is the hip new thing.

Who knew?

Well, not you.

And it wasn't so much your design he
bought as my salesmanship.

Oh, well, does he want a hundred of your
salesmanship or a hundred of my design?

You know, the way I see it, you guys did
this together.

We really did it.

I recognized the potential of the shirt,
and Reba didn't want any part of it. She

told me to run with it, and I did.

Me, not her.

Right, but it was my shirt.

Yeah, which I bought, which would make
it my shirt.

I bought a greeting card once. That
doesn't make me Hallmark.

Well, I bought a lollipop once.

Doesn't make me a sucker.

This is my idea, my business, my
company, and my money.

Your idea, my design.

Your business, my design. Do you get
where I'm going with this? Hey, hey,

hey, hey, hey.

Why don't you guys just share?

Oh, she has... Get her chance.

Oh, come on, Barbara Jean.

It was Reba's design.

It's only fair that she gets half.

Now, you remember what your mother
taught you.

Don't shave above the knee unless you're
expecting company.

No, the other thing.

He who is fair makes friends everywhere.

Okay, fine, but if she gets half the
money, she does half the work.

Well, of course I will.

I've been looking for a way to get some
cash for Kears College Fund.

Apparently I'll do anything.

Fine.

You win.

We'll work together, but I'll call the
shots.

If you hear any shots, they're coming
from me.

do three shirts a night we're still
ahead of schedule what's that the stink

of mediocrity okay moving forward i have
cut up a bunch of fabric for patches

so why don't you make a prototype for us
to work from what about the shirt

already made it was left with the buyer
what why would you do that management

made a decision we're just gonna have to
live with it

Go back and get the shirt and we'll
start again tomorrow.

And lose a whole day?

Unacceptable!

We've got shirts, we've got patches, do
that thing you do!

If you don't lower your voice, I'm going
to do that thing I've always wanted to

do.

I knew you were going to ruin this for
me.

Ruin what?

Barbara Jean, quit being so testy.

I am not testy.

I am a serious businesswoman.

and this company can afford a
psychiatrist.

Hey, Cheyenne, what you doing?

Making a list of insulting names to call
Van when he gets back from shaving his

head. You know, I can't believe he's
doing that after I absolutely positively

told him not to.

Oh, my gosh.

This is the first husband who's ever had
a problem with a direct order.

Did you happen to tell him why you
didn't want him to do this?

No. Huh. We might be on to something.

Look, I can ask you what's wrong, and
eventually you'll tell me. Then I'll go

to Van and tell him. Then he'll tell me
his side of the story, and I'll just get

you two to work it out. But you know
what?

I still got dinner to make. So go talk
to him. Yeah, but Van doesn't have a

side, Mom.

Of course he does. That's what marriage
is, finding out each other's side.

Go talk to him. All right, I get it.
It's just I... Go talk to him.

I just feel like I'm married.

You know, you can be very annoying
sometimes, Mother.

The kid has a point. Ah, shut up.

What's it going to be?

Shave it.

Bet you hear this a lot.

My old lady doesn't want me to do it.

But, I mean, it's my head.

It should be my decision.

I just hate when she's mad at me.

I don't know. I don't know.

What do you think?

Okay.

Okay, let's do it.

over, is there?

Van, I need to talk to you.

Could you give us a minute, please?

Sure.

I'll go see if that stripy thing is
turning.

What is it, Cheyenne?

I'm kind of in the middle of something
here.

Whoa.

That feels weird.

Do this and then do this.

Look, Van, my mom... My

mom said that I should tell you why I
didn't want you to do this

instead of just ordering you around.

Let me finish.

I didn't want you to do this because it
made me feel left out.

Oh, so I am.

You want to shave your head, too?

No.

My hair's beautiful.

I felt left out because, you know, you
have the job and it...

Taking up all these areas of your life
and now it's taking your hair.

This doesn't mean anything. This is
something I have to do for my job.

It's similar to how some people have to
take certain tests to get a job. Like

when a bartender has to pass the bar.

Look, it used to be just you and me.

Now you have this whole other life and
I'm not even a part of it.

I tried to make you a part of it.

I mean, I came to you two times.

I mean, I wanted your support.

I wanted you to be here with me because
I'm doing this for you and Elizabeth.

I'm doing this for our future.

I mean, do you think I really want to
look like the mayor of Munchkinland?

Look, I'm sorry, Van. It's just... You
know, this is the only Van I've ever

known.

Look, look.

If you don't want me to finish, I guess
I don't have to.

I mean, yeah.

I'm pretty sure we can afford a very
narrow toupee.

So what's it going to be?

Okay.

Jake's in bed.

How's your head?

Are you sane yet?

a failure.

We failed.

I didn't fail. I ain't started yet.

Jean, calm down.

We got plenty of time.

No, we don't.

We don't know how much time we have.

Sure we do.

The shirts aren't due till next Friday.

Reba, open your eyes.

I'm not talking about the shirt.

I'm talking about Brock.

He's selling the practice. He wants to
play pro golf.

I don't think he knows what he's doing.

Oh, honey.

Is that what you're worried about?

Of course he doesn't know what he's
doing.

He's making all these changes, Reba.

What if the next change he wants to make
is me?

Oh, that's not going to happen.

Well, you'll forgive me if I don't find
much comfort in the assurances of his ex

-wife.

If the worst does happen, Reba, I... I
just need to know that I can be

something other than Brock's wife.

But apparently I can't.

I can't even be the crazy lady that
makes shirts.

Barbara Jean, he loves you.

He loved you too.

The man's a pig.

The company finally agrees on something.

Barbara Jean, look at me.

Look at me. Look at me.

Brock isn't going anywhere.

He loves you. He's crazy about you.
Okay?

Thank you. You're welcome.

Let's see what you got going here.

Barb Jean, I gotta look at it sometime.

Come on.

By the time it goes back, I might even
miss it.

When's that going to be, by the way?

Hey, honey, it's Daddy.

I didn't treat you like that when you
were bald.

Sorry, I think I made a mistake.

No, you just have to remember why you
did it, to be like one of the guys.

Well, let's see.

You guys didn't do it.

What? Yeah, they tricked me.

They're mean.

Hold me.