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1
00:00:04,304 --> 00:00:06,501
Okay, gimme my latte
2
00:00:07,046 --> 00:00:08,777
Why does yours say Patrice?
3
00:00:08,777 --> 00:00:10,755
Oh, that's my coffee name
4
00:00:12,152 --> 00:00:14,020
You have a coffee name?
5
00:00:14,020 --> 00:00:16,299
There's a lot you don't know about me
6
00:00:16,582 --> 00:00:18,095
Eh, maybe that's all
7
00:00:20,669 --> 00:00:23,696
Hello, dear. It's your mother
8
00:00:23,696 --> 00:00:25,766
Calling from heaven, I hope
9
00:00:28,713 --> 00:00:31,569
Bad news about your father's
birthday this weekend, dear
10
00:00:31,569 --> 00:00:33,868
Your sisters can't make it
11
00:00:33,868 --> 00:00:37,743
So it'll just be you and me
and the old putz. Hm
12
00:00:37,743 --> 00:00:41,045
Did I hang up? I can't tell if I hung up
I can't--I can't tell. This--
13
00:00:41,045 --> 00:00:42,367
Martin!
14
00:00:44,257 --> 00:00:46,639
What? Just me and them?
15
00:00:46,639 --> 00:00:48,573
Oh, no, that ain't gonna happen
16
00:00:48,573 --> 00:00:50,288
It's gonna be me, them, and you
17
00:00:50,288 --> 00:00:51,355
No, no, no
18
00:00:51,355 --> 00:00:53,932
No, no, there's no way
Tyler's going all the way up there
19
00:00:53,932 --> 00:00:57,540
Tyler? / That's my getting-out-of-
going-to-your-parent's-house name
20
00:00:58,726 --> 00:01:00,286
Why do you need me anyway?
21
00:01:00,286 --> 00:01:01,845
I thought you were going with Karen?
22
00:01:01,845 --> 00:01:05,571
No, she's just dropping me off
on her way up to Canyon Ranch
23
00:01:05,571 --> 00:01:07,748
She's getting two things removed
and one thing added on
24
00:01:07,748 --> 00:01:09,783
I didn't ask for details
25
00:01:10,887 --> 00:01:13,166
Hey, Tyler. Hey, Patrice
26
00:01:14,447 --> 00:01:15,752
Hey, Jack how would you like to--
27
00:01:15,752 --> 00:01:18,172
Uh, no, I'm not going to your dad's birthday party
28
00:01:18,489 --> 00:01:20,887
You should know by now,
I listen to your answering machine
29
00:01:21,427 --> 00:01:25,358
Besides... I've been busy developing
my new show at Out TV
30
00:01:25,358 --> 00:01:28,086
It's very hush-hush, very secret,
very Wisteria Lane
31
00:01:28,580 --> 00:01:32,546
And yet, I found the time to do
a big fat favor for my big fat friend!
32
00:01:32,839 --> 00:01:36,264
I've set you up on a blind date
with one of the hottest guys in the city
33
00:01:36,264 --> 00:01:41,335
Well, I guess that means two of the hottest
guys in the city will be sitting at one table
34
00:01:43,061 --> 00:01:44,326
No
35
00:01:47,090 --> 00:01:48,933
Okay, I'll do it
It's only because it gives me
36
00:01:48,933 --> 00:01:52,016
an actual excuse not to go
to your father's birthday party
37
00:01:52,016 --> 00:01:57,018
Every time I go up there, I just end up
being the butt of his jokes for the entire visit
38
00:01:57,549 --> 00:02:02,335
You know, Grace, I just realized
I've never met your father
39
00:02:02,335 --> 00:02:05,929
In my mind, I've cast him as Judd Hirsch
40
00:02:07,199 --> 00:02:10,007
America's favorite cranky Jew
41
00:02:11,832 --> 00:02:14,415
He hasn't noticed anything I've done
since I was 12-years-old,
42
00:02:14,415 --> 00:02:16,647
let the door open and the cat got out
43
00:02:16,647 --> 00:02:19,809
Tells the story over and over
It's not even funny
44
00:02:19,809 --> 00:02:23,474
Well, if you're still looking for it--
Meow
45
00:02:44,531 --> 00:02:49,309
Well, Grace, was it a long drive?
I mean, did you have to pee a lot?
46
00:02:50,842 --> 00:02:52,586
Did she have to pee a lot?
47
00:02:52,586 --> 00:02:54,787
I had to pull over three times
'cause her majesty here
48
00:02:54,787 --> 00:02:57,326
is too good for a Big Gulp cup
49
00:02:58,838 --> 00:03:03,576
I'm sorry if I was self-conscious with you
shouting "fill it up and win a prize."
50
00:03:04,146 --> 00:03:07,268
Well, I was just afraid of missing you
before I had to go to Utica
51
00:03:07,268 --> 00:03:11,592
Mmm! You like my hair?
It's reversible. Whoo
52
00:03:12,749 --> 00:03:16,018
Wait, what-- Wait, you're leaving?
53
00:03:16,018 --> 00:03:20,243
I can't help that, dear. You know,
Edith Cratz, she sprained her knee
54
00:03:20,243 --> 00:03:24,161
because she was running away
from that robot vacuum cleaner
55
00:03:25,065 --> 00:03:28,555
Yes, so, well, I'm replacing her in Les Mis
56
00:03:28,555 --> 00:03:31,249
Oh, it's gonna be a fabulous production
57
00:03:31,249 --> 00:03:34,377
We have a cast of six
58
00:03:35,947 --> 00:03:38,227
Wait, so you're leaving me alone with Dad?
59
00:03:38,227 --> 00:03:40,645
What--what am I supposed to do with him?
60
00:03:40,645 --> 00:03:43,645
Ma, this is worse than the time that you told me
that you were gonna take me out for ice cream,
61
00:03:43,645 --> 00:03:46,186
and you ended up dropping me off at camp!
62
00:03:46,748 --> 00:03:50,308
Well did they, or did they not
have ice cream there?
63
00:03:50,668 --> 00:03:53,166
Martin, your daughter's here!
64
00:03:53,166 --> 00:03:55,250
I hope it's the good one
65
00:03:57,547 --> 00:04:01,626
Well, I guess this one will do
But we better close the doors
66
00:04:01,626 --> 00:04:04,843
We don't want the cat running off again, right Gracie?
67
00:04:05,947 --> 00:04:08,069
Hi, Daddy
Daddy, you remember Karen?
68
00:04:08,069 --> 00:04:10,882
How could I forget Karen?
She arm-wrestled me for beers,
69
00:04:10,882 --> 00:04:13,116
and then stole my heart medication
70
00:04:14,907 --> 00:04:16,726
That was a good buzz
71
00:04:18,555 --> 00:04:20,573
I talked to Jesus
72
00:04:22,795 --> 00:04:24,634
Well, I've gotta run
73
00:04:24,634 --> 00:04:28,594
Oh, Martin, have a wonderful birthday
74
00:04:28,594 --> 00:04:33,687
And I'm giving you a present
You won't hear from me for two days
75
00:04:34,203 --> 00:04:38,106
And it fits me perfectly
I love it
76
00:04:38,348 --> 00:04:40,514
Bye, dear. Bye-bye
77
00:04:42,786 --> 00:04:44,118
So?
78
00:04:45,387 --> 00:04:46,879
So
79
00:04:51,348 --> 00:04:53,487
It's funny 'cause it's awkward
80
00:04:57,414 --> 00:05:00,626
So how's work?
They--they like you there?
81
00:05:03,477 --> 00:05:05,938
- Uh, Dad, it's just me and Karen
- Ah
82
00:05:05,938 --> 00:05:08,026
And the answer is no
83
00:05:11,126 --> 00:05:14,474
Well, I'm gonna go grab a sandwich
And, uh, keep the door closed
84
00:05:14,474 --> 00:05:16,266
because I haven't read the paper yet
85
00:05:16,266 --> 00:05:18,792
And I don't want it to run off like the cat
86
00:05:25,446 --> 00:05:28,757
Oh, he's starting in on the jokes already. Ugh
87
00:05:28,757 --> 00:05:31,189
Honey, if you don't like
your relationship with your father
88
00:05:31,189 --> 00:05:32,940
you should try and change it
89
00:05:32,940 --> 00:05:36,113
Spend some time with him
Talk to him
90
00:05:36,954 --> 00:05:38,128
Maybe you're right
91
00:05:38,722 --> 00:05:40,346
Maybe I'll use this weekend to show him
92
00:05:40,346 --> 00:05:43,347
that I'm more than a punch line or just
someone who leaves the door open
93
00:05:43,347 --> 00:05:47,906
Hey, front door's wide open
I figured Grace must be here
94
00:05:48,994 --> 00:05:50,611
- Hi, Mr. Wolfe
- Gimme a huggie
95
00:05:50,611 --> 00:05:52,233
- Okay
- Oh, where's pop?
96
00:05:52,233 --> 00:05:54,950
- He's in th--
- And how you doin', darlin'?
97
00:05:55,417 --> 00:05:58,093
Burt Wolfe, semi-retired
98
00:06:00,414 --> 00:06:03,575
Karen Walker. Semi-hard
99
00:06:07,653 --> 00:06:11,426
"Burt Wolfe, Dry Cleaner."
Oh, my God, honey
100
00:06:11,426 --> 00:06:14,073
Have you ever heard anything sexier?
101
00:06:17,769 --> 00:06:20,375
Hi. I'm Will
You must be my blind date
102
00:06:20,375 --> 00:06:23,051
Hi, I'm Desmond
You must be my sighted date
103
00:06:24,225 --> 00:06:26,091
Oh, so you're actually--
104
00:06:26,091 --> 00:06:28,999
Oh, I hope you're not going to say
wearing the same outfit as you
105
00:06:31,267 --> 00:06:33,426
I guess Jack didn't tell you I was blind
106
00:06:33,426 --> 00:06:36,218
Look, this has happened before
So if you're, uh, having second thoughts
107
00:06:36,218 --> 00:06:38,431
Oh, no, no. I just wish I'd known
108
00:06:38,431 --> 00:06:41,244
I wouldn't have spent so much time
trying to pick out the right shirt
109
00:06:44,791 --> 00:06:46,630
That wasn't offensive, was it?
110
00:06:46,630 --> 00:06:50,394
No, only racial stuff offends me
I am black, right?
111
00:06:51,807 --> 00:06:53,265
Please, sit
112
00:06:53,265 --> 00:06:56,115
Um, anyway, why would I want to end the date?
113
00:06:56,115 --> 00:06:57,237
You're cute
114
00:06:57,237 --> 00:07:00,189
And, uh, when you get right down to it,
that's all that really matters anyway
115
00:07:00,950 --> 00:07:03,693
Do you mind if I, uh,
see what you look like?
116
00:07:03,693 --> 00:07:05,929
Oh, sure. Feel away
117
00:07:05,929 --> 00:07:08,611
I don't usually say that
in the first five minutes of a date
118
00:07:10,917 --> 00:07:12,947
Huh. Oh
119
00:07:13,963 --> 00:07:15,272
Hmm
120
00:07:16,385 --> 00:07:19,505
Oh. Jack did not mention that
121
00:07:21,413 --> 00:07:22,961
Did you not like what you felt?
122
00:07:22,961 --> 00:07:24,865
You don't think I'm good looking?
123
00:07:24,865 --> 00:07:26,337
No, no, no, no
124
00:07:26,337 --> 00:07:28,667
Just-- It's just annoying is what it is
125
00:07:28,667 --> 00:07:29,749
What?
126
00:07:29,749 --> 00:07:33,227
That because I'm the blind guy,
I get stuck with the dogs
127
00:07:35,909 --> 00:07:37,365
Excuse me!
128
00:07:37,365 --> 00:07:39,689
I am not a dog. Feel again
129
00:07:42,201 --> 00:07:45,068
You know, I'm getting a hell of a headache
Let's just get out of here
130
00:07:45,866 --> 00:07:48,268
Hey, it's fine with me if we
never see each other again
131
00:07:48,268 --> 00:07:50,369
I mean, not see, but that's--
132
00:07:51,250 --> 00:07:53,525
This is ridiculous
I am classically handsome
133
00:07:53,525 --> 00:07:55,137
In fact, in fact, I'm better looking than you
134
00:07:55,137 --> 00:07:56,832
I am better looking than anyone in this restaurant
135
00:07:56,832 --> 00:07:58,561
Uh-huh. Yeah, right
136
00:07:58,978 --> 00:08:02,889
Would someone please tell this man
how good looking I am?
137
00:08:05,597 --> 00:08:08,356
Did you hear me, or is everybody deaf?!
138
00:08:09,387 --> 00:08:13,235
Will Truman! You've been Pink'd!
139
00:08:15,715 --> 00:08:17,513
- "Pinked"?
- Yes! Pink'd!
140
00:08:17,513 --> 00:08:20,896
Out TV's non-derivative version of Punk'd!
141
00:08:20,896 --> 00:08:23,086
You're starring in it!
142
00:08:30,270 --> 00:08:34,234
- This was all a practical joke?
- Yes, at your expense!
143
00:08:34,706 --> 00:08:37,747
Jack, saw the whole thing
on the monitor, great show
144
00:08:37,747 --> 00:08:39,187
And you, come here
145
00:08:39,187 --> 00:08:42,573
You are one cocky, embarrassing star!
146
00:08:46,051 --> 00:08:48,389
I can't remember when I had such a good night's sleep
147
00:08:48,389 --> 00:08:52,529
Do you know that I slept better
in a foxhole in Korea under two feet of water
148
00:08:52,529 --> 00:08:54,938
than I do sleeping next to your mother?
149
00:08:56,556 --> 00:09:00,705
������ ��Ʈ���� �鸮 �뷡��
�������� ���� �� �Ƽ����ϱ��
150
00:09:03,105 --> 00:09:05,043
Anyway, happy birthday, Dad
151
00:09:05,043 --> 00:09:06,598
I thought that I would make us breakfast
152
00:09:06,598 --> 00:09:08,338
No! I don't want breakfast from a woman
153
00:09:08,338 --> 00:09:13,229
who thinks that French toast is made by
dumping syrup into a bag of bread
154
00:09:13,667 --> 00:09:16,746
- �� ����ݾƿ�
- �� ��������
155
00:09:16,746 --> 00:09:20,163
�׳� Ŀ�dz� �� �� ���ð�
�� �ð� �� ������ ġ�ô�
156
00:09:20,163 --> 00:09:24,334
Oh, um, I thought, uh,
we could hang out and talk
157
00:09:24,334 --> 00:09:26,557
Why? What's wrong?
You need money?
158
00:09:27,785 --> 00:09:30,431
No, but I'm here
159
00:09:30,431 --> 00:09:32,441
Shouldn't we spend a little time together?
160
00:09:32,441 --> 00:09:33,666
Maybe we can catch up?
161
00:09:33,666 --> 00:09:35,012
I mean there's a lot of things
that I haven't told you about
162
00:09:35,012 --> 00:09:36,885
what's going on in my life right now
163
00:09:36,885 --> 00:09:39,643
Maybe we could go for a walk
Talk a little bit
164
00:09:39,643 --> 00:09:42,865
- Maybe afterwards, go see a movie
- Oh, a movie
165
00:09:42,865 --> 00:09:44,334
I haven't been to a movie since The Sting
166
00:09:44,334 --> 00:09:47,191
When they do a better one than that, call me
167
00:09:47,810 --> 00:09:49,486
Hey, good morning, everybody
168
00:09:49,486 --> 00:09:52,793
Look who tagged along for
my morning power walk
169
00:09:53,975 --> 00:09:55,875
Talk about your "coinkidinks."
170
00:09:55,875 --> 00:09:58,393
I was taking the girls out for a run
in their jogging bra
171
00:09:58,393 --> 00:10:00,656
And guess who happened by?
172
00:10:02,282 --> 00:10:05,705
Say, Burt, some of my wife's hair
coloring came out on the sofa
173
00:10:05,705 --> 00:10:06,788
You wanna take a look?
174
00:10:06,788 --> 00:10:10,169
Sure, but I might have to
get some industrial solvent
175
00:10:12,348 --> 00:10:16,177
I hate when your father does that
This is Burt's one day off!
176
00:10:17,256 --> 00:10:21,770
What can you possibly see in Mr. Wolfe?
He's creepy and weird
177
00:10:21,770 --> 00:10:23,425
Honey, how can you say that?
178
00:10:23,425 --> 00:10:26,132
And after all the lovely things
that he's said about you
179
00:10:26,132 --> 00:10:30,197
while he was watching you through
binoculars from his home office
180
00:10:33,028 --> 00:10:34,643
Aw, he did?
181
00:10:37,497 --> 00:10:40,249
So, honey, how's everything going with your dad?
182
00:10:40,249 --> 00:10:42,306
Has he stopped seeing you as a big joke?
183
00:10:42,306 --> 00:10:44,882
'Cause when you figure out
how he does it, tell me
184
00:10:49,323 --> 00:10:54,150
No, I haven't. I try to change things
185
00:10:54,150 --> 00:10:56,018
I asked him if he wanted to spend the day with me
186
00:10:56,018 --> 00:10:58,507
but, uh, he'd rather play golf
187
00:10:58,787 --> 00:11:00,698
Well, honey, you should go with him
188
00:11:00,698 --> 00:11:02,387
That's where he feels comfortable
189
00:11:02,387 --> 00:11:05,187
And men let their guard down
when they feel comfortable
190
00:11:05,187 --> 00:11:07,315
Huh? Take Burt for instance
191
00:11:07,315 --> 00:11:11,483
Just this morning, he told me
the combination to his safe
192
00:11:13,070 --> 00:11:15,806
As we lay on the fold-out watching you get dressed
193
00:11:18,789 --> 00:11:20,330
Aw
194
00:11:23,347 --> 00:11:25,506
This is where Charlie Heinz missed the putt
195
00:11:25,506 --> 00:11:27,869
lost the whole club championship
196
00:11:27,869 --> 00:11:31,053
We all thought he choked
Turns out he had a mini-stroke
197
00:11:31,053 --> 00:11:34,189
Now he can only say the word "chair"
198
00:11:34,586 --> 00:11:36,117
You know, I don't think I ever told you
199
00:11:36,117 --> 00:11:39,359
I did a redesign on a country club in West Chester
200
00:11:39,359 --> 00:11:42,126
New York Magazine, actually, they did a piece on it
201
00:11:42,126 --> 00:11:44,388
Yeah. I remember--
202
00:11:44,388 --> 00:11:49,091
I remember when you had a lemonade stand
and you spilled lemonade all over the place
203
00:11:49,091 --> 00:11:50,242
Heh-heh...
204
00:11:51,693 --> 00:11:53,548
Yeah, similar story
205
00:11:55,206 --> 00:11:59,968
Oh, yeah, and this is where Arnie Regal--
lost complete use of his right side
206
00:12:00,507 --> 00:12:03,328
Hey, where'd you go?
207
00:12:07,478 --> 00:12:12,443
Ah. You missed a great wrap party
at White Castle last night
208
00:12:12,443 --> 00:12:14,867
Whoo, it was off the hook!
209
00:12:16,218 --> 00:12:19,749
Jamie let us get one big thing,
and one little thing
210
00:12:19,749 --> 00:12:22,185
Well, I'm glad everybody had a good time
211
00:12:22,917 --> 00:12:26,364
Uh-oh. Are you mad?
212
00:12:27,432 --> 00:12:30,875
You're mad, your mood mole is getting darker
213
00:12:32,948 --> 00:12:35,793
Well, it should be a light blue, because I'm fine
214
00:12:35,793 --> 00:12:39,207
Although, if it ever turns a light blue,
it's probably time for a biopsy
215
00:12:39,626 --> 00:12:42,839
All right, well, I can't believe I was worried
you were gonna get upset
216
00:12:42,839 --> 00:12:45,171
Oh, why would I be? It was funny
217
00:12:45,171 --> 00:12:47,483
My blind date was actually blind
218
00:12:47,888 --> 00:12:51,586
- I did not see that coming
- Ha ha! You looked pretty foolish!
219
00:12:51,586 --> 00:12:53,188
I felt pretty foolish
220
00:12:53,188 --> 00:12:55,898
Now I just need you to sign this release
so we can air the episode
221
00:12:55,898 --> 00:12:57,392
Yeah, I don't think so
222
00:13:00,352 --> 00:13:02,534
Well, if you don't sign it,
we can't put it on
223
00:13:02,534 --> 00:13:04,255
Yeah, I get that
224
00:13:05,515 --> 00:13:06,926
You are ruining me!
225
00:13:11,719 --> 00:13:15,910
So, we're on the fourth hole,
I tell her just relax and swing through
226
00:13:15,910 --> 00:13:18,825
This one, dammed if she doesn't take her shirt off
227
00:13:19,787 --> 00:13:21,755
Well, you said "tee off"
228
00:13:23,176 --> 00:13:25,956
- Are you sure you're all right?
- Dad, what do you think?
229
00:13:25,956 --> 00:13:28,158
I flew out of the cart, and
all you did was laugh about it
230
00:13:28,158 --> 00:13:29,360
Now, be reasonable
231
00:13:29,360 --> 00:13:33,438
The only reason I laughed, was
because it was very, very funny
232
00:13:34,047 --> 00:13:35,202
Grace, what happened?
233
00:13:35,202 --> 00:13:37,481
You know the water hazard off the eighth fairway?
234
00:13:37,481 --> 00:13:40,724
Well, I've driven many a ball into it,
but never a daughter
235
00:13:41,132 --> 00:13:43,526
You didn't happen to see
a Titleist 4 down there, did you?
236
00:13:48,817 --> 00:13:53,805
Titlest 4. I don't know what that is
237
00:13:54,458 --> 00:13:58,764
You know the beauty of it is, if I hadn't sliced,
I would've knocked her right into the green!
238
00:13:59,416 --> 00:14:00,927
Dad, stop it!
239
00:14:01,578 --> 00:14:02,928
Sweetheart, it's just a joke
240
00:14:02,928 --> 00:14:05,990
I'm not a joke. I'm your daughter
241
00:14:05,990 --> 00:14:08,038
But the only time you ever
show any interest in me at all
242
00:14:08,038 --> 00:14:09,230
is when something embarrassing happens
243
00:14:09,230 --> 00:14:13,528
that you could spin into some sort of funny joke
to tell your friends
244
00:14:13,528 --> 00:14:16,186
- Oh, sweetheart--
- Dad, no
245
00:14:16,683 --> 00:14:20,234
No, I'm going
Happy birthday, Dad
246
00:14:24,545 --> 00:14:25,990
Here's your ball
247
00:14:29,801 --> 00:14:31,713
Here's the thing
I just got back from Out TV
248
00:14:31,713 --> 00:14:34,114
and I'm in real trouble unless
you agree to be on the show
249
00:14:34,114 --> 00:14:36,077
Look, I wish I could help you
But I can't
250
00:14:36,077 --> 00:14:37,874
You--your stupid trick really hurt me, Jack
251
00:14:37,874 --> 00:14:40,686
Because it spoke to all of
my insecurities about my looks
252
00:14:40,686 --> 00:14:42,002
What?! Don't you get it?
253
00:14:42,002 --> 00:14:45,398
The only reason that was funny is
because everyone thinks you're handsome
254
00:14:45,882 --> 00:14:49,477
Even you? / Come on, Will,
you know how I feel about you
255
00:14:49,477 --> 00:14:51,816
So will you sign the release?
256
00:14:55,995 --> 00:14:58,923
No. And, no, I do know
how you feel about me
257
00:14:58,923 --> 00:15:03,133
You're always talking about my thinning hair
or my spreading thighs
258
00:15:03,133 --> 00:15:05,003
When have I ever done that?
259
00:15:05,851 --> 00:15:10,058
You changed my name on the mailbox
downstairs to Baldy McLegdough!
260
00:15:10,954 --> 00:15:15,516
Will, I only do that because I'm the one
who's insecure about my looks
261
00:15:15,711 --> 00:15:18,139
Now, please, will you help me out?
262
00:15:19,029 --> 00:15:22,040
No! What do you think-- You're just
saying that so I'll sign your stupid release
263
00:15:22,040 --> 00:15:23,333
No, I'm not
264
00:15:23,333 --> 00:15:27,971
Look, I know that
to you and the rest of the world
265
00:15:27,971 --> 00:15:34,791
I come off as beautiful
Almost godlike
266
00:15:36,250 --> 00:15:37,393
Okay...
267
00:15:37,393 --> 00:15:39,748
But trust me. It's just an act
268
00:15:39,748 --> 00:15:43,906
For instance, it pains me to show you this...
269
00:15:44,374 --> 00:15:46,346
but I'm ashamed of my ankles
270
00:15:47,099 --> 00:15:51,347
The hair has rubbed off in this area
because of sock chafing
271
00:15:52,269 --> 00:15:53,835
Ankle hair?
272
00:15:53,835 --> 00:15:56,315
You make me humiliate myself
in front of the entire restaurant
273
00:15:56,315 --> 00:15:58,065
and you give me ankle hair?
274
00:15:58,360 --> 00:16:00,226
If you want me to sign this release
you're gonna have to do a lot better than that
275
00:16:00,226 --> 00:16:03,451
All right! I'm gonna show you something
276
00:16:03,451 --> 00:16:06,837
But you have to promise it stays
in this room forever. You promise?
277
00:16:24,788 --> 00:16:30,195
Oh, my God
Is that a girdle?
278
00:16:30,918 --> 00:16:33,715
No. It is a man-girdle
279
00:16:35,346 --> 00:16:38,506
I got it in the man's section at Victoria's Secret
280
00:16:43,329 --> 00:16:45,882
Why would you wear something like that?
281
00:16:45,882 --> 00:16:48,536
You don't know the pressure to be
thin at a gay network, Will
282
00:16:48,536 --> 00:16:51,243
There's a purging station in every bathroom
283
00:16:54,125 --> 00:16:56,280
Now, will you sign it?
284
00:16:57,969 --> 00:16:59,877
After that, how could I not?
285
00:17:01,443 --> 00:17:05,233
Jack, there is one thing I should tell you
286
00:17:05,233 --> 00:17:06,317
What's that?
287
00:17:06,317 --> 00:17:09,400
Jack McFarland, you have been Pink'd!
288
00:17:09,773 --> 00:17:12,507
What?
Oh, my God!
289
00:17:12,966 --> 00:17:16,455
Will? Genius. Even better
than you at the restaurant
290
00:17:16,455 --> 00:17:18,436
Damn you, Will Truman!
291
00:17:18,436 --> 00:17:20,643
Well, I will not sign the release. A-ha!
292
00:17:20,643 --> 00:17:21,654
All right, if you won't sign the release
293
00:17:21,654 --> 00:17:24,355
will you sign this waiver for unlimited use
in perpetuity around the universe?
294
00:17:24,355 --> 00:17:25,954
Oh, I'd be delighted
295
00:17:32,917 --> 00:17:34,190
Hello, girls
296
00:17:34,681 --> 00:17:36,724
Marty, I know why you're here
297
00:17:37,310 --> 00:17:38,926
I live here
298
00:17:40,789 --> 00:17:42,747
So, hey, when Burt wakes up from his nap
299
00:17:42,747 --> 00:17:44,961
please tell him that I have a dry cleaner back home
300
00:17:44,961 --> 00:17:47,237
who has a couple of Korean kids working for him
301
00:17:47,237 --> 00:17:49,294
I can't just give that up
302
00:17:53,001 --> 00:17:56,950
Grace, I don't understand
All of a sudden, you hate my funny stories
303
00:17:56,950 --> 00:17:58,748
I don't hate them, Dad
304
00:17:58,748 --> 00:18:03,975
They'd be fine if every once in a while
between the cat and the cart
305
00:18:03,975 --> 00:18:06,285
we had a real conversation
306
00:18:06,587 --> 00:18:12,351
I wanna talk to you about my life
My work. My divorce. I mean--
307
00:18:12,825 --> 00:18:15,227
- Do you care about any of that?
- Yes, I do. Of course, I do
308
00:18:15,227 --> 00:18:17,236
Well then, talk to me without making a joke
309
00:18:17,236 --> 00:18:20,076
Okay, let's sit down and have a conversation
310
00:18:20,076 --> 00:18:21,873
Really, you think you can do that?
311
00:18:22,961 --> 00:18:24,286
Uh... I can try
312
00:18:48,505 --> 00:18:50,996
So, you ever talk to Leo?
313
00:18:53,995 --> 00:18:56,366
Actually, I haven't. But...
314
00:18:57,461 --> 00:18:59,851
from what I understand,
he's still out of the country
315
00:18:59,851 --> 00:19:02,928
Yeah, well, that was the problem, wasn't it?
He was never around
316
00:19:02,928 --> 00:19:04,318
And how's Will?
317
00:19:04,829 --> 00:19:06,291
He's fine
318
00:19:17,502 --> 00:19:22,542
Look, I give up. Do we laugh?
Do we not laugh? What?
319
00:19:23,459 --> 00:19:24,728
You can laugh
320
00:19:26,838 --> 00:19:31,416
Listen. You gotta help me here
I love you, but I'm an old guy
321
00:19:31,416 --> 00:19:34,576
And I'm gonna try to change,
but don't expect miracles
322
00:19:35,399 --> 00:19:38,481
I won't. Just, thanks for trying
323
00:19:42,144 --> 00:19:46,516
For the record, I was not gonna make
this another one of my jokes
324
00:19:47,365 --> 00:19:49,317
You know what?
You can have it
325
00:19:50,291 --> 00:19:51,584
Happy birthday, Dad
326
00:19:51,584 --> 00:19:54,180
Thanks, because I was gonna tell people anyway
327
00:19:57,528 --> 00:19:58,555
I can't believe you did this to me!
328
00:19:58,555 --> 00:20:00,995
How did you know I was gonna
make a fool of myself?
329
00:20:00,995 --> 00:20:02,549
Just a hunch
330
00:20:04,332 --> 00:20:06,166
Don't feel bad, Jack
331
00:20:06,706 --> 00:20:10,677
Truth is, I played this joke because...
332
00:20:10,677 --> 00:20:12,985
really I'm the one who's insecure
333
00:20:12,985 --> 00:20:14,291
You are?
334
00:20:14,622 --> 00:20:16,269
No. It's you
27103
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