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"Will & Grace" is recorded
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in front of a live studio audience.
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Okay, so let's see.
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You and Jenny have both had
the level two ultrasound
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00:00:10,890 --> 00:00:12,452
and done all the scary genetic tests.
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Right.
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We've taken Lamaze, baby-proofed,
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ordered cribs and changing tables.
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Done. Check.
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You both started your prenatal Pilates
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and have been going
twice a week for four weeks.
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That's on me.
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Okay, so, we've done
everything we need to.
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I think we can actually relax.
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It feels so good!
16
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We are crushing pregnancy, Will.
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Should we write a book about it?
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We could call it
"Will and Grace Crush Babies."
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And get Casey Anthony
to do the audiobook.
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Open up, I've got a baby emergency!
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Larry? What are you...
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Oh!
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You must be Larry's granddaughter!
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And your name is...
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Wheat.
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Her name is Wheat.
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- So pretty.
- Beautiful name, yeah.
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00:01:03,414 --> 00:01:05,337
It's a ridiculous name.
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I need your TV.
30
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Our cable's out.
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00:01:07,874 --> 00:01:11,049
For some reason, the sound
of Bobby Flay grilling meat
32
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is the only thing that puts her to sleep.
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Grace too.
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How's Hannah doing as a mom?
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She had to take a break
from college, right?
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She dropped out to make
green juice for dogs.
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But Hannah always seemed so together.
38
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Wake up, Grace. That was all a front.
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Joe and I were the first
gay couple we knew with a baby,
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so we had to say she was perfect.
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Her life went off the rails
in kindergarten.
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What, did she get hooked
on graham crackers?
43
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And here comes Will with his jokes!
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We waited too long
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to sign her up
for the best elementary school,
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so she didn't get
in to the best high school,
47
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and after that, it was a train wreck.
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I thought she went to NYU.
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Northern Yonkers University.
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Their motto is, "Let's call it a day."
51
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Don't make the same mistake.
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Set your children on the right
path before it's too late.
53
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Oh, well, we did the research.
54
00:02:07,247 --> 00:02:09,746
We want them to go
to that school in Harlem...
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Global Citizens Academy.
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Like, all of their kids
end up going to Ivy League.
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You're already signed up?
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Well, they're not even born yet.
59
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Then you're already too late.
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They fill up years in advance.
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What?
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Come on, we gotta get
to that school right now.
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Now?
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00:02:26,835 --> 00:02:28,020
I promised Jenny I'd help her
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with some new internet thing she's doing.
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Well, send Jack,
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unless you want our kids
to be dog-juice-making losers.
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Sorry.
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No, shame her mother in front of her.
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She needs to learn.
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Synced & corrected by -robtor-
www.addic7ed.com
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Doesn't that feel so good?
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Oh, my God, I can totally
feel the tingling
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00:03:03,219 --> 00:03:05,014
on the top of my head.
75
00:03:05,016 --> 00:03:07,319
Like whenever Chris Pine is in the city.
76
00:03:08,032 --> 00:03:10,083
So that's the point of an ASMR video.
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You make sounds that trigger
responses in your brain
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that help you relax.
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And people pay for that?
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Hell yeah, they do.
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I once curled ribbons for 20 minutes
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and made 600 bucks.
83
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How did I not know about this?
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I curl ribbons every day for free.
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Well, I'm stoked that you're doing this,
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because it's much better with two people.
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Just be glad it's me and not Will.
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Yeah, I know we're not
supposed to say this
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00:03:30,332 --> 00:03:31,293
about women anymore,
90
00:03:31,295 --> 00:03:33,027
but Will is so shrill.
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- Let's do a practice one.
- Okay.
92
00:03:36,877 --> 00:03:38,833
So, remember
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to speak softly,
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and over-articulate
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your consonants.
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Right.
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00:03:49,999 --> 00:03:52,789
It's like what my new acting teacher,
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00:03:52,791 --> 00:03:55,035
Tracy Pecosta,
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taught me to do
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00:03:56,481 --> 00:03:58,597
so that I don't sound
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like a homosexual.
102
00:04:02,832 --> 00:04:07,002
It's bedtime, so don't forget
to brush your teeth.
103
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And your hair.
104
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I like to do it 50 times
105
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on each side
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for a total of...
107
00:04:32,223 --> 00:04:34,309
100 times.
108
00:04:35,721 --> 00:04:38,768
Well, thanks again
for coming all the way out.
109
00:04:38,769 --> 00:04:42,132
Honey, the ride up here
was worth the ride in here.
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And after what we just did,
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I may have to borrow that thing.
112
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I can see myself out.
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No way.
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A gentleman always rolls a lady
to the door.
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True,
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but you, sir, are no gentleman.
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No, I'm not.
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There's the door, woman.
119
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I'll see you tomorrow, Jenny.
120
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Hey, Kar.
121
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I didn't know you were gonna be here.
122
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I would've asked for a ride up.
123
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But I'm already here.
124
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Can't argue with that.
125
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So, uh, you and Luke, huh?
126
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Getting a tune-up?
127
00:05:19,228 --> 00:05:21,857
- Oh!
- Ooh, yeah!
128
00:05:21,859 --> 00:05:24,167
Rotating your tires?
129
00:05:24,169 --> 00:05:27,536
Woo!
130
00:05:27,538 --> 00:05:29,461
Just getting my oil changed,
131
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getting my fluids topped off.
132
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Getting all my points and plugs adjusted.
133
00:05:40,084 --> 00:05:41,568
Yeah.
134
00:05:43,164 --> 00:05:45,018
We're talking about sex, right?
135
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Honey, what are you doing here?
136
00:05:47,816 --> 00:05:50,317
Oh, I'm helping Jenny
with this ASMR thing.
137
00:05:50,319 --> 00:05:51,696
Oh, fun.
138
00:05:51,698 --> 00:05:53,751
I used to make those videos for Stan
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when he was out of town.
140
00:05:55,452 --> 00:05:56,798
Nothing put that man to sleep
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00:05:56,800 --> 00:05:59,616
like the bubbling of melting cheese.
142
00:06:00,650 --> 00:06:02,220
Hey, we're livestreaming tomorrow.
143
00:06:02,222 --> 00:06:04,466
- You should do it with us.
- Oh, I don't know, honey.
144
00:06:04,468 --> 00:06:05,397
With the baseball team
145
00:06:05,399 --> 00:06:08,124
and all the work piling up
at Grace's office...
146
00:06:08,126 --> 00:06:09,343
I'd love to.
147
00:06:09,345 --> 00:06:10,915
Oh, great! Okay.
148
00:06:10,917 --> 00:06:12,199
Hey, can I get a ride back?
149
00:06:12,201 --> 00:06:14,055
Sorry, I'm already gone.
150
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Just my luck.
151
00:06:18,104 --> 00:06:19,193
Oh, you must be Jack.
152
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Oh, and you're Luke.
153
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Thank you for your service
154
00:06:23,431 --> 00:06:25,163
of my best friend.
155
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I do it for God and country.
156
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Yeah, I don't want to hear the specifics.
157
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I'm just happy she finally
got herself a booty buddy.
158
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A booty buddy?
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00:06:35,078 --> 00:06:36,744
Yeah, well, since the divorce,
160
00:06:36,746 --> 00:06:38,444
I've been telling her
she needs to find someone
161
00:06:38,446 --> 00:06:40,209
who's just there for sex, you know?
162
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No strings attached,
no emotional blah-blah,
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just sex.
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And that's me?
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Say it with pride, soldier!
166
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You're Karen Walker's boy toy!
167
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Her boy toy?
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00:06:52,949 --> 00:06:55,482
Well, that was more wistful
than, you know, pride,
169
00:06:55,484 --> 00:06:58,145
but you've probably never
worked with a director before.
170
00:07:02,012 --> 00:07:04,738
And now we're in the Hall of Mindfulness,
171
00:07:04,740 --> 00:07:06,407
because here at Global Citizens,
172
00:07:06,409 --> 00:07:09,198
we don't want our students
to just be present
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in their attendance.
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- Ooh, that's good.
- I like that.
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00:07:11,831 --> 00:07:13,562
That's good, yeah.
176
00:07:20,429 --> 00:07:22,545
Our third-graders
have a concert coming up
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in seven months.
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Don't worry, they'll get there.
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Shall we sit?
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Love an alternative seat.
181
00:07:41,605 --> 00:07:44,491
Why just sit when you can work your core?
182
00:07:44,493 --> 00:07:45,871
That structure is really cool.
183
00:07:45,873 --> 00:07:47,861
The sixth-grade
woodworking class built it
184
00:07:47,863 --> 00:07:51,068
using wood rescued
from various hurricanes.
185
00:07:51,070 --> 00:07:53,346
It's a permanent reminder
that something beautiful
186
00:07:53,348 --> 00:07:54,918
can be made from tragedy.
187
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Oh, I know.
188
00:07:56,140 --> 00:07:57,230
After Hurricane Sandy,
189
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I found the most comfortable
sweatshirt on the street.
190
00:08:03,744 --> 00:08:05,830
I washed it.
191
00:08:06,632 --> 00:08:08,620
Thanks for squeezing us in,
Ms. Hinder-Haagen.
192
00:08:08,622 --> 00:08:10,615
This place is amazing.
193
00:08:10,617 --> 00:08:13,399
I actually saw kids running
into math class.
194
00:08:13,401 --> 00:08:16,255
I hated math!
195
00:08:16,257 --> 00:08:17,636
Did I say math? I meant...
196
00:08:17,638 --> 00:08:19,335
racism.
197
00:08:22,354 --> 00:08:23,379
Excuse me?
198
00:08:23,381 --> 00:08:25,574
Headmistress Hinder-Haagen,
is this a bad time?
199
00:08:25,598 --> 00:08:26,527
How can I help you?
200
00:08:26,529 --> 00:08:29,062
An issue has arisen in the robotics lab.
201
00:08:29,064 --> 00:08:30,954
Our AI has become sentient.
202
00:08:30,956 --> 00:08:33,458
However, its corporeal host
is still in beta testing.
203
00:08:33,460 --> 00:08:35,190
My God, you do that here?
204
00:08:35,192 --> 00:08:36,922
That's incredible!
205
00:08:36,924 --> 00:08:39,168
- You'll explain...
- Later, yeah, shh.
206
00:08:39,170 --> 00:08:41,575
Farhan is our Student Admissions Liaison.
207
00:08:41,577 --> 00:08:42,643
You'll be meeting with him
208
00:08:42,645 --> 00:08:44,014
for the second part of this process.
209
00:08:44,016 --> 00:08:46,388
If I may ask, how old is your child?
210
00:08:46,390 --> 00:08:47,736
And how do they identify?
211
00:08:47,737 --> 00:08:49,596
Oh, ah, well, no children yet.
212
00:08:49,598 --> 00:08:52,195
Grace's is due in April, mine in May,
213
00:08:52,196 --> 00:08:55,178
and my pronouns are "he"
and "is terrified."
214
00:08:58,004 --> 00:08:59,415
We didn't know there were two children.
215
00:08:59,417 --> 00:09:00,793
Oh, we're not married.
216
00:09:00,795 --> 00:09:01,660
We're just friends,
217
00:09:01,662 --> 00:09:04,003
but we both want our kids to go here.
218
00:09:04,004 --> 00:09:05,606
Oh, that's going to be a problem.
219
00:09:05,608 --> 00:09:07,051
For 2024 enrollment,
220
00:09:07,053 --> 00:09:08,527
we only have one spot available.
221
00:09:08,529 --> 00:09:09,682
One?
222
00:09:09,684 --> 00:09:10,836
That's in five years!
223
00:09:10,838 --> 00:09:12,281
Mm, four years.
224
00:09:12,283 --> 00:09:13,499
Four years.
225
00:09:18,700 --> 00:09:20,205
You decent?
226
00:09:20,207 --> 00:09:22,234
'Cause I can wait till you're not.
227
00:09:23,317 --> 00:09:24,473
What's up?
228
00:09:24,475 --> 00:09:27,809
Oh, I'm just helping
your sister with her video,
229
00:09:27,811 --> 00:09:29,734
but afterward, I thought it'd be fun
230
00:09:29,736 --> 00:09:32,141
if we had a little picnic.
231
00:09:32,143 --> 00:09:35,125
Oh, darn.
232
00:09:35,127 --> 00:09:38,718
These aren't sandwiches,
they're sex toys.
233
00:09:39,331 --> 00:09:40,901
And a bag of chips for after,
234
00:09:40,903 --> 00:09:44,430
'cause we're gonna need the potassium.
235
00:09:44,431 --> 00:09:46,386
Yeah, I'm not really feeling it.
236
00:09:46,388 --> 00:09:47,382
Oh.
237
00:09:47,384 --> 00:09:49,307
I'm sorry, I can't be
your booty call today.
238
00:09:49,309 --> 00:09:50,942
Booty call?
239
00:09:50,944 --> 00:09:52,715
Where'd you get that idea?
240
00:09:53,736 --> 00:09:55,179
It doesn't matter.
241
00:09:55,181 --> 00:09:56,108
I mean, we already agreed
242
00:09:56,110 --> 00:09:57,970
that if our kids can't go
to the same school,
243
00:09:57,972 --> 00:09:58,933
it's not the school for us.
244
00:09:58,935 --> 00:10:00,152
Right, we're a packaged deal.
245
00:10:00,154 --> 00:10:01,130
Their loss, not ours.
246
00:10:01,132 --> 00:10:03,681
Didn't get in?
247
00:10:03,682 --> 00:10:04,835
Shh!
248
00:10:04,837 --> 00:10:06,760
I finally got Wheat to sleep.
249
00:10:06,762 --> 00:10:09,391
And yes, it is 11:45 in the morning,
250
00:10:09,393 --> 00:10:11,524
and I'm having a drink.
251
00:10:12,024 --> 00:10:13,884
If I'm still awake in 20 minutes,
252
00:10:13,886 --> 00:10:16,259
I'm going to take a bath.
253
00:10:16,261 --> 00:10:18,344
How long are you planning
on staying here?
254
00:10:18,346 --> 00:10:21,270
As long as that demon's unconscious.
255
00:10:22,773 --> 00:10:24,696
Look, there's no way either of you
256
00:10:24,698 --> 00:10:26,621
were getting in to Global Citizens.
257
00:10:26,623 --> 00:10:28,258
You're not diverse enough.
258
00:10:28,260 --> 00:10:29,669
What are you talking about? I'm gay.
259
00:10:32,655 --> 00:10:35,606
What do you think this is? 2009?
260
00:10:35,608 --> 00:10:38,974
I tried to play the gay card
to get Hannah in.
261
00:10:38,976 --> 00:10:40,836
CeeCee said, "Just gay?"
262
00:10:40,838 --> 00:10:43,329
And laughed me out of their planetarium.
263
00:10:43,853 --> 00:10:46,016
Well, I'm a single mom, so.
264
00:10:46,740 --> 00:10:48,215
I'm also Jewish.
265
00:10:48,216 --> 00:10:51,190
So is every building on that campus.
266
00:10:51,971 --> 00:10:52,867
Well, it doesn't matter,
267
00:10:52,869 --> 00:10:54,728
'cause we're done with Global Citizens.
268
00:10:54,730 --> 00:10:56,621
There's plenty of other
good schools in this city.
269
00:10:56,623 --> 00:10:57,648
You know what, you're right.
270
00:10:57,650 --> 00:10:59,187
I don't even want my kid to go there.
271
00:10:59,189 --> 00:11:00,632
Me neither.
272
00:11:00,634 --> 00:11:02,718
I love that we always agree.
273
00:11:02,720 --> 00:11:04,643
Thank you so much for seeing me again,
274
00:11:04,645 --> 00:11:05,757
Headmistress Hinder-Haagen.
275
00:11:05,759 --> 00:11:06,782
Of course.
276
00:11:06,784 --> 00:11:09,729
I know how important
diversity is to this school.
277
00:11:09,731 --> 00:11:10,931
It is,
278
00:11:10,933 --> 00:11:13,690
and your child would be diverse
how, exactly?
279
00:11:13,692 --> 00:11:15,743
I'm just gonna bottom line it.
280
00:11:15,745 --> 00:11:17,619
I don't know who the father is.
281
00:11:18,474 --> 00:11:19,401
So, girl to girl,
282
00:11:19,403 --> 00:11:20,965
tell me what diversity
you're looking for,
283
00:11:20,967 --> 00:11:22,713
'cause I've probably slept with it.
284
00:11:24,441 --> 00:11:27,005
You know, I know that gay
is done to death,
285
00:11:27,007 --> 00:11:29,893
but I'm gonna make the argument
that it is back in a big way.
286
00:11:29,895 --> 00:11:31,338
Can you feel me, girl?
287
00:11:34,002 --> 00:11:35,765
I guess you cannot.
288
00:11:41,304 --> 00:11:43,357
Buttons.
289
00:11:45,893 --> 00:11:48,650
Cellophane.
290
00:11:53,272 --> 00:11:55,484
Lorazepam.
291
00:11:59,561 --> 00:12:01,196
Since we're live,
292
00:12:01,198 --> 00:12:04,211
if there are any sounds
you would like to hear
293
00:12:04,213 --> 00:12:06,105
or questions you have,
294
00:12:06,107 --> 00:12:07,708
just hit us up.
295
00:12:07,710 --> 00:12:10,560
I have a question.
296
00:12:11,946 --> 00:12:13,580
Who told Luke
297
00:12:13,582 --> 00:12:16,821
that he was just a booty call?
298
00:12:20,006 --> 00:12:23,501
That... was me.
299
00:12:25,389 --> 00:12:27,365
Why?
300
00:12:28,503 --> 00:12:31,015
Why not?
301
00:12:32,255 --> 00:12:35,688
Do you have any idea
302
00:12:35,690 --> 00:12:38,959
how furious I am?
303
00:12:40,469 --> 00:12:44,254
It's kind of hard to tell.
304
00:12:45,635 --> 00:12:48,810
I could make it clearer.
305
00:12:53,335 --> 00:12:54,970
Would you two
306
00:12:54,972 --> 00:12:57,793
like to take this outside?
307
00:12:57,795 --> 00:13:01,964
Why, that's a great idea.
308
00:13:01,966 --> 00:13:03,701
Or...
309
00:13:04,597 --> 00:13:07,387
it's a bad idea,
310
00:13:07,389 --> 00:13:10,340
because Karen's rings
311
00:13:10,342 --> 00:13:12,686
leave welts.
312
00:13:14,192 --> 00:13:17,859
Welts.
313
00:13:18,362 --> 00:13:21,088
I had a good thing going,
314
00:13:21,090 --> 00:13:24,392
and you ruined it.
315
00:13:24,394 --> 00:13:28,567
Stop yelling at me.
316
00:13:29,753 --> 00:13:31,194
Why don't you just try
317
00:13:31,196 --> 00:13:33,921
being honest with my brother?
318
00:13:33,923 --> 00:13:35,526
I will.
319
00:13:35,528 --> 00:13:37,322
But first,
320
00:13:37,324 --> 00:13:39,151
I would like
321
00:13:39,153 --> 00:13:41,120
to reach across
322
00:13:41,122 --> 00:13:43,580
this table
323
00:13:43,582 --> 00:13:47,204
and pull your balls...
324
00:13:52,333 --> 00:13:56,160
out through your ears.
325
00:13:58,789 --> 00:14:01,319
Mr. Truman, give me one good reason
326
00:14:01,321 --> 00:14:03,247
why your child should have
the final spot?
327
00:14:03,249 --> 00:14:04,562
Okay.
328
00:14:04,564 --> 00:14:05,760
Okay.
329
00:14:05,762 --> 00:14:07,546
We're at that part of the conversation.
330
00:14:07,548 --> 00:14:10,338
I'm not above writing a check.
331
00:14:10,340 --> 00:14:12,038
One to the school,
332
00:14:12,040 --> 00:14:14,332
and one to a certain little guy
333
00:14:14,334 --> 00:14:17,417
who I'm sure wants
the newest Nintendo Switch.
334
00:14:18,297 --> 00:14:21,825
I made $15,000 last week
shorting Apple stock.
335
00:14:23,047 --> 00:14:24,937
And if I want a Nintendo Switch,
336
00:14:24,939 --> 00:14:26,605
I'll build one.
337
00:14:29,248 --> 00:14:32,027
Well, this has been very...
338
00:14:32,029 --> 00:14:33,941
informative.
339
00:14:34,597 --> 00:14:36,487
Is there anything else you can think of
340
00:14:36,489 --> 00:14:38,252
that would help your case?
341
00:14:38,254 --> 00:14:39,471
Oh, okay.
342
00:14:39,473 --> 00:14:41,140
I thought we'd get here.
343
00:14:41,142 --> 00:14:44,317
Just so you know, I'm not above
writing a check
344
00:14:44,318 --> 00:14:46,534
to a certain lady
345
00:14:46,536 --> 00:14:50,349
who may want a new iPhone case.
346
00:14:54,074 --> 00:14:55,437
I'm good.
347
00:14:56,189 --> 00:14:58,755
Ah, looks like Farhan's ready
to meet with you now.
348
00:15:01,363 --> 00:15:04,113
Oh, my God. You came here behind my back?
349
00:15:04,115 --> 00:15:05,845
You came here behind my back!
350
00:15:05,847 --> 00:15:08,592
Yeah, but that's totally on brand for me.
351
00:15:09,344 --> 00:15:11,759
Look, I am just trying to do
what's best for my child.
352
00:15:11,783 --> 00:15:12,871
Yeah, but so am I.
353
00:15:12,873 --> 00:15:16,080
But let's face it, Grace,
I mean, given the parents,
354
00:15:16,081 --> 00:15:18,036
mine is obviously gonna be
a better candidate
355
00:15:18,038 --> 00:15:19,279
for this school.
356
00:15:19,281 --> 00:15:20,411
What do you mean by that?
357
00:15:20,413 --> 00:15:22,369
Well, you know, it's a very
358
00:15:22,371 --> 00:15:24,390
academically oriented environment.
359
00:15:24,392 --> 00:15:25,423
And?
360
00:15:25,425 --> 00:15:27,631
And I am very academically oriented.
361
00:15:27,632 --> 00:15:30,036
I'm a professor at Columbia Law School.
362
00:15:30,038 --> 00:15:31,303
Look, it's a little bit more
363
00:15:31,305 --> 00:15:32,988
than picking out tassels
for throw pillows.
364
00:15:32,990 --> 00:15:36,025
And there it is.
365
00:15:36,747 --> 00:15:38,924
You think I'm dumb.
366
00:15:38,926 --> 00:15:41,613
And you think my kid is gonna be dumb.
367
00:15:41,615 --> 00:15:44,311
I do not think your kid is gonna be dumb.
368
00:15:44,313 --> 00:15:45,771
Thank you.
369
00:15:46,370 --> 00:15:47,776
Wait.
370
00:15:48,680 --> 00:15:51,373
You just need to feel smarter
because you know
371
00:15:51,375 --> 00:15:53,171
that everyone likes me best.
372
00:15:53,173 --> 00:15:55,287
"Better" is the word you use
when comparing two options.
373
00:15:55,289 --> 00:15:58,464
And this is why everyone likes me best.
374
00:15:58,466 --> 00:16:00,196
Oh, whatever, this isn't
a school for people
375
00:16:00,198 --> 00:16:01,769
with more Facebook friends.
376
00:16:01,771 --> 00:16:03,237
It's a school for smart people.
377
00:16:03,239 --> 00:16:04,752
Well, why don't you
just homeschool your kid?
378
00:16:04,754 --> 00:16:08,219
That way, you can teach him
how to have a stick up his ass.
379
00:16:08,221 --> 00:16:09,835
Excuse me?
380
00:16:10,369 --> 00:16:12,389
We try to keep the energy neutral
381
00:16:12,391 --> 00:16:14,410
in the Mindfulness Hallway.
382
00:16:16,274 --> 00:16:17,856
- He started it.
- She's dumb.
383
00:16:26,548 --> 00:16:28,503
Just wanted to say good-bye.
384
00:16:30,269 --> 00:16:32,354
Listen,
385
00:16:32,356 --> 00:16:34,499
about the whole "booty call" thing...
386
00:16:34,523 --> 00:16:35,549
I get it.
387
00:16:35,677 --> 00:16:37,696
It's not like you were
coming up here once a week
388
00:16:37,698 --> 00:16:40,917
so we could pick out timeshares
in Vermont together.
389
00:16:41,484 --> 00:16:43,438
Vermont.
390
00:16:43,440 --> 00:16:45,459
Like that's even a thing.
391
00:16:48,445 --> 00:16:50,016
It's 'cause of this, right?
392
00:16:50,018 --> 00:16:52,070
Oh, honey, no.
393
00:16:52,072 --> 00:16:54,026
That just makes it more fun.
394
00:16:54,028 --> 00:16:55,598
It adds an element of danger,
395
00:16:55,600 --> 00:16:58,166
like doing it
on the "Jurassic Park" ride.
396
00:16:59,772 --> 00:17:01,823
The one in Orlando, not California.
397
00:17:04,649 --> 00:17:06,252
The truth is,
398
00:17:06,254 --> 00:17:08,872
I've had a rough time this last year.
399
00:17:09,366 --> 00:17:11,931
I guess a booty call
400
00:17:11,933 --> 00:17:14,045
is about all I can handle right now.
401
00:17:14,892 --> 00:17:18,291
Well, I think I'm looking
for a little more.
402
00:17:18,382 --> 00:17:20,302
Are you breaking up with me?
403
00:17:21,956 --> 00:17:24,649
Well, you better lawyer up,
you ungrateful mother...
404
00:17:24,674 --> 00:17:25,890
Oh!
405
00:17:30,811 --> 00:17:32,855
Sorry, reflex. Okay.
406
00:17:33,938 --> 00:17:36,348
What I'm trying to say is,
407
00:17:36,350 --> 00:17:39,588
I'm glad that you're ready
to get back out there.
408
00:17:39,590 --> 00:17:41,919
Well, I think some of that's
thanks to you.
409
00:17:43,003 --> 00:17:44,486
Happy to help.
410
00:17:52,520 --> 00:17:53,831
Hey.
411
00:17:54,959 --> 00:17:56,719
One more for the road?
412
00:17:58,221 --> 00:17:59,160
Why not?
413
00:17:59,162 --> 00:18:01,085
This picnic's not gonna spank itself.
414
00:18:09,268 --> 00:18:11,157
Well, this is humiliating.
415
00:18:12,580 --> 00:18:13,861
Yes, it is.
416
00:18:13,885 --> 00:18:14,991
Thanks to you.
417
00:18:15,028 --> 00:18:15,973
Me?
418
00:18:15,975 --> 00:18:17,215
You're the one who used half the words
419
00:18:17,217 --> 00:18:19,058
on the forbidden word wall!
420
00:18:20,498 --> 00:18:23,577
Again, the Contrition Cubby
is for gentle reflection,
421
00:18:23,579 --> 00:18:25,308
not hostility.
422
00:18:25,310 --> 00:18:27,360
Well, it should have a TV.
423
00:18:28,327 --> 00:18:30,442
It's my sociology project.
424
00:18:30,444 --> 00:18:32,998
It's a commentary on mass incarceration.
425
00:18:33,000 --> 00:18:34,775
Without personal accountability,
426
00:18:34,777 --> 00:18:36,732
one can never be truly free.
427
00:18:38,986 --> 00:18:41,775
Fine, I'm sorry I called you dumb.
428
00:18:41,799 --> 00:18:42,760
You're not.
429
00:18:42,797 --> 00:18:44,646
And I'm sorry I said
430
00:18:45,203 --> 00:18:47,191
nobody liked you.
431
00:18:47,215 --> 00:18:48,304
It's not everyone.
432
00:18:48,328 --> 00:18:49,940
Just the people we know.
433
00:18:51,107 --> 00:18:53,190
- We good?
- No.
434
00:18:55,953 --> 00:18:59,415
I am sorry I was so selfish.
435
00:19:00,496 --> 00:19:02,644
You're my entire support system
through this,
436
00:19:02,668 --> 00:19:05,361
and the first sign of trouble,
437
00:19:05,385 --> 00:19:06,891
I threw you overboard.
438
00:19:06,915 --> 00:19:08,910
I did the same thing to you.
439
00:19:09,505 --> 00:19:11,203
No matter how much I tell myself,
440
00:19:11,227 --> 00:19:12,541
"My kid doesn't need two parents,"
441
00:19:12,565 --> 00:19:14,648
I worry I won't be enough.
442
00:19:14,691 --> 00:19:16,774
You know, not getting in
to the right school
443
00:19:16,776 --> 00:19:18,873
just felt like I was already failing.
444
00:19:18,897 --> 00:19:22,006
There's no part of this
that I want to do without you.
445
00:19:22,030 --> 00:19:23,311
Me neither.
446
00:19:23,462 --> 00:19:27,520
This is more important
than some fancy school.
447
00:19:27,913 --> 00:19:30,360
It seems like we've had a breakthrough.
448
00:19:30,384 --> 00:19:32,493
Rainbow, release them, please.
449
00:19:34,712 --> 00:19:35,735
You're free to go.
450
00:19:35,737 --> 00:19:37,546
- Oh.
- Thanks.
451
00:19:38,946 --> 00:19:40,517
Please leave the crayons.
452
00:19:46,280 --> 00:19:48,454
Office supplies are very expensive.
453
00:19:49,700 --> 00:19:51,143
You can tell Ms. Hinder-Haagen
454
00:19:51,167 --> 00:19:53,763
that we are withdrawing our applications.
455
00:19:53,787 --> 00:19:56,610
No need. The last spot was just filled.
456
00:19:56,634 --> 00:19:57,920
Oh, hey, guys.
457
00:19:59,675 --> 00:20:03,070
Guess who just got the
last space for 2024.
458
00:20:03,452 --> 00:20:07,963
A mixed-race child of a single teen
mom with two gay grandparents.
459
00:20:09,760 --> 00:20:11,932
Isn't that right, Samantha?
460
00:20:14,019 --> 00:20:15,942
I'm changing her name, I don't care.
31342
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