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You! You murderer!
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This isn't murder.
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It's an execution.
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TAPE REWINDS
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SINGING
♪ Fallen in love with someone
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♪ Ever fallen in love,
in love with someone
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00:00:57,240 --> 00:00:58,719
♪ Ever fallen in love
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♪ In love with someone you
shouldn't've fallen in love with
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00:01:06,840 --> 00:01:11,079
♪ Fallen in love with someone you
shouldn't've fallen in love with. ♪
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Yeah! Woo!
Yes, Clive.
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Come on, Clive!
HE LAUGHS
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RADIO
Ever Fallen In Love
by Buzzcocks
13
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Excuse me, I'm looking for Connor.
14
00:02:12,760 --> 00:02:14,399
I think he's up on the roof.
15
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On the Bishop Street side.
16
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Thanks...
17
00:02:18,080 --> 00:02:19,399
...Rajesh.
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00:02:19,400 --> 00:02:20,520
Cheers.
19
00:02:30,160 --> 00:02:31,760
{\an8}WORKMEN CHATTER
20
00:02:37,160 --> 00:02:39,199
{\an8}How'd you get in?
I was just passing.
21
00:02:39,200 --> 00:02:40,359
{\an8}How's it going?
22
00:02:40,360 --> 00:02:43,119
{\an8}You're passing ten floors up.
How's that happen?
23
00:02:43,120 --> 00:02:44,719
There's no jobs, Clive,
I've got nothing.
24
00:02:44,720 --> 00:02:46,759
Yeah, I was just wondering, cos,
you know, I find myself free,
25
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so I thought I'd offer.
No, don't need you.
26
00:02:48,400 --> 00:02:50,279
I can do anything.
27
00:02:50,280 --> 00:02:52,599
Where's that lad that used
to work for you, Francis?
28
00:02:52,600 --> 00:02:53,759
Where's he now?
29
00:02:53,760 --> 00:02:54,919
I got rid of him.
30
00:02:54,920 --> 00:02:56,119
I'll tell you where he is.
31
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He's working for Ashbury's.
32
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And do you know what? He's happy.
33
00:02:59,280 --> 00:03:00,839
Proper little smiler, he is.
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Not when he was with you.
He was miserable as sin,
35
00:03:03,400 --> 00:03:04,919
cos you bullied him, night and day.
36
00:03:04,920 --> 00:03:06,879
He was useless.
He was good, Clive.
37
00:03:06,880 --> 00:03:08,399
You stamped on him.
38
00:03:08,400 --> 00:03:09,679
So, no, I don't have any jobs,
39
00:03:09,680 --> 00:03:10,879
cos no one likes working with you.
40
00:03:10,880 --> 00:03:13,199
You're a fucking misery,
truth be told.
41
00:03:13,200 --> 00:03:14,359
You'll employ Rajesh.
42
00:03:14,360 --> 00:03:15,559
Yes, I will.
43
00:03:15,560 --> 00:03:16,800
What's wrong with him?
44
00:03:18,880 --> 00:03:20,999
Just... work's a bit short,
so if you hear of anything, I...
45
00:03:21,000 --> 00:03:22,279
I won't.
Well, if you do...
46
00:03:22,280 --> 00:03:24,799
I won't!
But there is something.
47
00:03:24,800 --> 00:03:27,159
You can tell your lot I said thanks.
48
00:03:27,160 --> 00:03:29,239
What do you mean?
I've been going sites like these
49
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since I was 16 years old,
and I saved, Clive.
50
00:03:32,600 --> 00:03:34,399
Saved like a dog
right from the start,
51
00:03:34,400 --> 00:03:36,479
cos I thought,
"I'd like a nice life one day."
52
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Just me and the missus,
nice little life.
53
00:03:38,160 --> 00:03:40,559
And I got one.
Tiny little farmhouse.
54
00:03:40,560 --> 00:03:42,719
It's a wreck, but I done it up.
55
00:03:42,720 --> 00:03:45,079
Ten years it took me,
now it's all done.
56
00:03:45,080 --> 00:03:47,479
My retirement, all set up.
57
00:03:47,480 --> 00:03:50,759
Except I can go there
for 90 days. That's all.
58
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Just 90 sodding days,
59
00:03:52,920 --> 00:03:54,719
cos it's in France, isn't it?
60
00:03:54,720 --> 00:03:57,879
90 days and I've gotta go home,
thanks to your lot.
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00:03:57,880 --> 00:04:00,919
Now I'm voting leave, for you.
62
00:04:00,920 --> 00:04:02,640
Piss off, Clive.
63
00:04:36,480 --> 00:04:38,839
I can pay you 120 a day.
64
00:04:38,840 --> 00:04:40,239
I can do bar work for that.
65
00:04:40,240 --> 00:04:41,599
Yeah, but I'm paying two wages.
66
00:04:41,600 --> 00:04:43,719
Sick pay for Bugs,
and now his replacement.
67
00:04:43,720 --> 00:04:45,560
I can give you six days,
and that's it.
68
00:04:57,560 --> 00:04:58,680
SOFT CHATTER
69
00:04:59,960 --> 00:05:01,560
THEY LAUGH
70
00:05:04,400 --> 00:05:07,239
Um, do you mind
not eating in the hall?
71
00:05:07,240 --> 00:05:09,559
Eh? It's like a doss house.
72
00:05:09,560 --> 00:05:12,319
Some of us have got to live here.
73
00:05:12,320 --> 00:05:15,159
Are you gonna be turning
the electric off again?
74
00:05:15,160 --> 00:05:17,479
You should've got a letter.
I did, and I read it,
75
00:05:17,480 --> 00:05:20,599
and it was a photocopy,
it wasn't specific to this place,
76
00:05:20,600 --> 00:05:22,840
so I don't trust you for a second.
77
00:05:27,120 --> 00:05:28,280
Diane.
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00:05:29,880 --> 00:05:31,240
Flat five.
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Clive.
80
00:05:36,040 --> 00:05:37,400
See you, Clive.
81
00:05:47,520 --> 00:05:49,159
This roll?
82
00:05:49,160 --> 00:05:51,799
Please, stop! Stop, stop!
83
00:05:51,800 --> 00:05:52,840
Yes!
84
00:05:54,880 --> 00:05:56,520
£100 in the bank.
85
00:05:58,440 --> 00:06:01,280
Right, your second go. Good luck.
86
00:06:03,480 --> 00:06:05,080
Liz... Liz.
87
00:06:15,640 --> 00:06:17,559
That's what I like to see.
88
00:06:17,560 --> 00:06:18,960
Hard at work.
89
00:06:20,840 --> 00:06:22,839
Where's your... your little mates?
90
00:06:22,840 --> 00:06:24,679
Oh, you know what it's like,
same old story.
91
00:06:24,680 --> 00:06:27,639
New job across town,
and off they go.
92
00:06:27,640 --> 00:06:29,879
If I was in charge,
I wouldn't allow it.
93
00:06:29,880 --> 00:06:32,519
Oh, so you're not the boss, then?
94
00:06:32,520 --> 00:06:35,479
HE LAUGHS.
No, not me, no.
95
00:06:35,480 --> 00:06:38,679
If I was running this,
it'd be finished by now.
96
00:06:38,680 --> 00:06:40,399
Well...
97
00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:43,039
...that would be a shame.
98
00:06:43,040 --> 00:06:45,879
So, packed his stuff,
chucked him out.
99
00:06:45,880 --> 00:06:47,159
That wasn't the end of it, though,
100
00:06:47,160 --> 00:06:49,199
because he'd left
all these bills unpaid.
101
00:06:49,200 --> 00:06:50,599
I found them!
102
00:06:50,600 --> 00:06:52,799
He'd stuffed them away,
103
00:06:52,800 --> 00:06:54,359
hidden them, like a squirrel.
104
00:06:54,360 --> 00:06:56,519
There was council tax, electricity,
105
00:06:56,520 --> 00:06:58,359
some of them going back months.
106
00:06:58,360 --> 00:07:00,359
I said, "What's all this?"
107
00:07:00,360 --> 00:07:02,319
He said, "I just panic."
108
00:07:02,320 --> 00:07:04,399
I said, "What do you mean, you just
panic?"
109
00:07:04,400 --> 00:07:06,839
He said, "It's me dyslexia."
110
00:07:06,840 --> 00:07:08,359
Oh, God, I bet, yeah.
111
00:07:08,360 --> 00:07:10,479
That's just a bloody excuse,
isn't it?
112
00:07:10,480 --> 00:07:11,679
That's what I said!
113
00:07:11,680 --> 00:07:13,479
You know,
there's no such thing as dyslexia.
114
00:07:13,480 --> 00:07:15,639
Oh, my God,
that's exactly what I said!
115
00:07:15,640 --> 00:07:17,079
I've been saying that
to him for years.
116
00:07:17,080 --> 00:07:19,919
It's just a fraud. You know, it's,
like, this billion-dollar industry.
117
00:07:19,920 --> 00:07:23,199
Oh, my God, you are like
a voice in the wilderness.
118
00:07:23,200 --> 00:07:26,199
This is too good to be true.
119
00:07:26,200 --> 00:07:29,199
Come on, tell me,
is there a Mrs Clive?
120
00:07:29,200 --> 00:07:31,759
Eh?
Because there is, isn't there?
121
00:07:31,760 --> 00:07:32,959
Yeah, yeah.
122
00:07:32,960 --> 00:07:34,159
Marie.
123
00:07:34,160 --> 00:07:36,359
Been married 24 years.
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00:07:36,360 --> 00:07:38,919
Two boys, Saul and George.
125
00:07:38,920 --> 00:07:40,159
Old-fashioned names.
126
00:07:40,160 --> 00:07:42,439
Yeah.
127
00:07:42,440 --> 00:07:45,999
And how are you, you and Marie?
128
00:07:46,000 --> 00:07:47,320
Yeah, we're OK.
129
00:07:48,560 --> 00:07:52,200
You know,
both a bit knackered, but...
130
00:07:53,280 --> 00:07:54,480
...I'm in the bad books.
131
00:07:56,240 --> 00:07:58,920
You know,
I have been for a very long time.
132
00:08:02,040 --> 00:08:03,200
Why?
133
00:08:08,960 --> 00:08:11,959
Go easy, it costs me enough.
134
00:08:11,960 --> 00:08:13,199
Oh...
135
00:08:13,200 --> 00:08:16,079
I just, just made a mistake,
you know?
136
00:08:16,080 --> 00:08:18,079
So, we went on
holiday to Scarborough,
137
00:08:18,080 --> 00:08:20,440
to this, caravan park.
138
00:08:22,080 --> 00:08:23,279
And there was this woman,
139
00:08:23,280 --> 00:08:25,519
cos they had this restaurant,
140
00:08:25,520 --> 00:08:28,359
well, it was, like, a cafe thing,
and she worked there.
141
00:08:28,360 --> 00:08:29,999
Patricia. Patricia.
142
00:08:30,000 --> 00:08:33,119
Yeah, listen, it had just been a
long time since anyone fancied me,
143
00:08:33,120 --> 00:08:35,559
and Patricia, she was, like,
she was looking, you know?
144
00:08:35,560 --> 00:08:38,239
And I kinda, well,
to be fair, I was puzzled.
145
00:08:38,240 --> 00:08:40,440
Get to the point.
Well, I slept with her.
146
00:08:44,440 --> 00:08:49,359
And just one night,
they had this barbecue, and...
147
00:08:49,360 --> 00:08:51,639
...Marie... found out.
148
00:08:51,640 --> 00:08:55,119
And kaboom, you know, that was it.
149
00:08:55,120 --> 00:08:56,599
Never forgiven.
150
00:08:56,600 --> 00:08:57,879
To this day.
151
00:08:57,880 --> 00:08:59,879
And I mean never, ever forgiven.
152
00:08:59,880 --> 00:09:01,920
I mean never.
153
00:09:04,440 --> 00:09:08,359
And I've paid the price for
that to this sodding day, I have.
154
00:09:08,360 --> 00:09:10,799
How did she find out?
155
00:09:10,800 --> 00:09:14,079
Um, well, I told her.
156
00:09:14,080 --> 00:09:17,879
Well, what did you do that for?
157
00:09:17,880 --> 00:09:20,280
I've learnt my lesson now,
haven't I?
158
00:09:22,360 --> 00:09:23,960
So, you won't tell her next time?
159
00:09:27,560 --> 00:09:28,880
No.
160
00:09:32,720 --> 00:09:35,199
There's a little Italian,
Barlow Moor Road.
161
00:09:35,200 --> 00:09:39,039
Friday night,
they do two courses for 15 quid.
162
00:09:39,040 --> 00:09:40,360
Fancy it?
163
00:10:00,360 --> 00:10:02,440
Right, I'm off.
Tell Stewart I said hello.
164
00:10:07,000 --> 00:10:08,840
MUSIC PICKS UP
165
00:10:11,560 --> 00:10:12,760
Hey.
166
00:10:50,040 --> 00:10:51,240
Clive, yeah?
167
00:10:53,400 --> 00:10:54,800
All right, down here.
168
00:10:56,760 --> 00:10:58,560
LADY SPEAKS ON SPEAKER PHONE
169
00:11:03,840 --> 00:11:05,320
THEY SPEAK IN THEIR LANGUAGE
170
00:11:08,000 --> 00:11:10,039
Oh, you don't mind, do you?
171
00:11:10,040 --> 00:11:11,199
No, go for it.
172
00:11:11,200 --> 00:11:13,679
Yeah. It's my girlfriend.
HE LAUGHS
173
00:11:13,680 --> 00:11:16,399
She's got a new job.
She's very excited.
174
00:11:16,400 --> 00:11:20,800
THEY SPEAK IN THEIR LANGUAGE
175
00:11:22,800 --> 00:11:24,639
Oh, thank you.
176
00:11:24,640 --> 00:11:26,599
She says thanks.
HE LAUGHS
177
00:11:26,600 --> 00:11:28,360
THEY SPEAK IN THEIR LANGUAGE
178
00:11:53,800 --> 00:11:55,160
CONVERSATION FADES
179
00:12:40,520 --> 00:12:41,879
We're not allowed to take tips.
180
00:12:41,880 --> 00:12:43,120
Buy her something.
181
00:12:44,880 --> 00:12:46,479
Thank you very much.
182
00:12:46,480 --> 00:12:48,839
He gave me £10, you know. For you.
183
00:12:48,840 --> 00:12:53,119
Oh, that's so nice of him.
Thank you!
184
00:12:53,120 --> 00:12:54,480
Yeah, nice guy, ain't he?
185
00:13:01,480 --> 00:13:03,000
LAUGHTER
186
00:13:08,280 --> 00:13:10,999
Well, you didn't stand me up.
187
00:13:11,000 --> 00:13:12,000
That's a good sign.
188
00:13:13,600 --> 00:13:16,039
You look smart.
189
00:13:16,040 --> 00:13:18,159
I was gonna make a
bit more of an effort,
190
00:13:18,160 --> 00:13:21,199
but, Christine phoned
just as I got in and I said,
191
00:13:21,200 --> 00:13:22,799
"Not now, Christine,"
but she wouldn't stop.
192
00:13:22,800 --> 00:13:26,399
Right, cos I wanted to say,
193
00:13:26,400 --> 00:13:30,839
I think I should make it clear
that there's not gonna be any sex,
194
00:13:30,840 --> 00:13:33,159
you know, so...
195
00:13:33,160 --> 00:13:35,079
Who said there was?
No one.
196
00:13:35,080 --> 00:13:37,360
There's not.
Let me sit down, for fuck's sake.
197
00:13:43,440 --> 00:13:45,919
I just think I should explain.
198
00:13:45,920 --> 00:13:49,799
Um, because with Patricia, that was
the woman in the caravan park.
199
00:13:49,800 --> 00:13:51,159
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know who she is.
200
00:13:51,160 --> 00:13:52,880
Yeah, well, I didn't sleep with
her.
201
00:13:56,640 --> 00:13:58,519
OK. I mean, there was a moment,
you know.
202
00:13:58,520 --> 00:14:01,319
I mean, she was... she was looking,
all the time.
203
00:14:01,320 --> 00:14:02,759
I mean, Marie noticed, she said,
204
00:14:02,760 --> 00:14:04,439
"Look, she's looking," and,
205
00:14:04,440 --> 00:14:05,839
and there was this
big barbecue thing,
206
00:14:05,840 --> 00:14:07,119
but I didn't...
207
00:14:07,120 --> 00:14:10,119
Nothing happened, we...
208
00:14:10,120 --> 00:14:12,919
...did not.
209
00:14:12,920 --> 00:14:14,919
And what do you want, eh? A medal?
210
00:14:14,920 --> 00:14:17,279
I just think you should know,
that's all.
211
00:14:17,280 --> 00:14:18,640
Then why did you say you did?
212
00:14:22,960 --> 00:14:25,599
Because it would make her cross.
213
00:14:25,600 --> 00:14:26,639
Who?
Marie.
214
00:14:26,640 --> 00:14:27,839
Your wife?
Yeah.
215
00:14:27,840 --> 00:14:28,840
Hang on.
216
00:14:29,920 --> 00:14:32,479
You didn't just tell me
you slept with Patricia,
217
00:14:32,480 --> 00:14:35,999
you told your wife you slept
with Patricia, when you didn't.
218
00:14:36,000 --> 00:14:38,319
Yeah.
So, you made it all up?
219
00:14:38,320 --> 00:14:40,839
You lied to your wife?
For how long?
220
00:14:40,840 --> 00:14:44,159
Well, you know, six years.
221
00:14:44,160 --> 00:14:47,800
She's been punishing you
for six years for nothing?
222
00:14:49,240 --> 00:14:50,319
Does she know now?
223
00:14:50,320 --> 00:14:52,599
Have you told her?
Does she know the truth?
224
00:14:52,600 --> 00:14:53,759
No.
225
00:14:53,760 --> 00:14:55,879
Jesus Christ, Clive.
226
00:14:55,880 --> 00:14:58,039
I mean, Jesus Christ.
227
00:14:58,040 --> 00:15:00,159
Why did you lie in the first place?
228
00:15:00,160 --> 00:15:02,959
Because...
229
00:15:02,960 --> 00:15:07,319
I thought it would
make me look, um...
230
00:15:07,320 --> 00:15:08,440
What?
231
00:15:11,680 --> 00:15:12,800
Sexy.
232
00:15:23,320 --> 00:15:26,959
Well, I will say,
233
00:15:26,960 --> 00:15:30,080
it was the most
interesting thing about you.
234
00:15:31,160 --> 00:15:33,119
Don't say anything.
235
00:15:33,120 --> 00:15:36,279
Don't make a fuss.
236
00:15:36,280 --> 00:15:37,520
Don't do that to me.
237
00:16:34,680 --> 00:16:37,199
So, what happened?
238
00:16:37,200 --> 00:16:39,760
Just, nothing much.
239
00:16:41,560 --> 00:16:44,319
Stewart's really boring
since he got that job and,
240
00:16:44,320 --> 00:16:46,000
Brody's got work tomorrow, so...
241
00:16:48,920 --> 00:16:50,559
Where are the boys?
242
00:16:50,560 --> 00:16:54,319
Out.
243
00:16:54,320 --> 00:16:55,960
Still?
244
00:16:59,000 --> 00:17:01,080
Friday night.
245
00:17:20,720 --> 00:17:21,960
I was thinking, the boys...
246
00:17:23,640 --> 00:17:25,999
We said we'd wait 'til they were old
enough and then split up,
247
00:17:26,000 --> 00:17:28,519
but it's not gonna work, is it?
248
00:17:28,520 --> 00:17:30,719
We can't afford it, Clive.
249
00:17:30,720 --> 00:17:33,319
Either I leave, or you leave,
250
00:17:33,320 --> 00:17:36,359
and I can't afford a flat, can you?
251
00:17:36,360 --> 00:17:38,279
I'm trying to get more work,
aren't I?
252
00:17:38,280 --> 00:17:39,959
I'm not having a go.
253
00:17:39,960 --> 00:17:41,120
Then what?
254
00:17:45,520 --> 00:17:49,519
Well, it could be years till
the boys leave home.
255
00:17:49,520 --> 00:17:50,799
Saul's showing no sign,
256
00:17:50,800 --> 00:17:52,719
and even if George goes
to university,
257
00:17:52,720 --> 00:17:57,479
they go, and then they come back.
That's what happens these days.
258
00:17:57,480 --> 00:17:59,919
So?
259
00:17:59,920 --> 00:18:06,600
So, I'm saying that we stay like
this, living here, it's not so bad.
260
00:18:08,640 --> 00:18:11,000
Well, I don't think it's bad at all.
261
00:18:14,480 --> 00:18:16,960
Well, it is,
if you don't mind my saying so.
262
00:18:18,960 --> 00:18:21,599
But if we accept it,
and all right, yes,
263
00:18:21,600 --> 00:18:26,520
OK, I will stop having
a go at you, then we'd be OK.
264
00:18:28,320 --> 00:18:30,520
We could stop pretending.
265
00:18:32,360 --> 00:18:33,760
At what?
266
00:18:36,320 --> 00:18:37,999
This.
267
00:18:38,000 --> 00:18:40,240
We could stop this.
268
00:18:43,040 --> 00:18:44,320
OK. Yeah.
269
00:18:45,880 --> 00:18:47,239
It's about time.
270
00:18:47,240 --> 00:18:48,479
Is it?
271
00:18:48,480 --> 00:18:50,360
I don't need it, I'm fine.
272
00:18:52,200 --> 00:18:55,439
And I know men like
to have their little bit of fun,
273
00:18:55,440 --> 00:18:57,919
God knows you're proof of that,
274
00:18:57,920 --> 00:18:59,719
but you could finish yourself off.
275
00:18:59,720 --> 00:19:01,639
You do it anyway.
276
00:19:01,640 --> 00:19:03,199
If you're 20 minutes in
the bathroom,
277
00:19:03,200 --> 00:19:04,839
the boys say you're having a wank.
278
00:19:04,840 --> 00:19:06,519
Jesus. Well, aren't you?
279
00:19:06,520 --> 00:19:07,840
Marie.
280
00:19:11,320 --> 00:19:15,639
I just think it would help if
we stop planning
281
00:19:15,640 --> 00:19:18,040
for things that are never
gonna happen.
282
00:19:19,640 --> 00:19:21,640
Cos I dream of it, Clive.
283
00:19:23,200 --> 00:19:25,160
Little flat all on my own...
284
00:19:26,600 --> 00:19:28,240
...tiny little garden...
285
00:19:29,720 --> 00:19:31,879
...window in the sunlight
286
00:19:31,880 --> 00:19:34,480
so Mum can come and sit with me.
287
00:19:38,320 --> 00:19:39,840
it's never gonna happen, is it?
288
00:19:44,480 --> 00:19:47,440
So, what, we just stay like this
forever, do we?
289
00:19:53,760 --> 00:19:56,480
Well, one of us will die,
in the end.
290
00:21:02,960 --> 00:21:04,439
You in tonight?
291
00:21:04,440 --> 00:21:05,919
Fuck's it matter to you?
292
00:21:05,920 --> 00:21:07,080
All right, I'm just...
293
00:21:13,840 --> 00:21:15,279
How's your project?
294
00:21:15,280 --> 00:21:16,319
What project?
295
00:21:16,320 --> 00:21:19,199
American civil rights.
What grade did you get?
296
00:21:19,200 --> 00:21:22,200
Dunno. Well, you do know, come on.
What grade did you get?
297
00:21:23,440 --> 00:21:24,760
A B.
298
00:21:26,720 --> 00:21:29,559
Oh. Can't you work a bit harder?
299
00:21:29,560 --> 00:21:32,639
What did you get in school then?
No, go on. What grade did you get?
300
00:21:32,640 --> 00:21:36,839
All right. So, tell me about it.
About what?
301
00:21:36,840 --> 00:21:38,799
American civil rights.
302
00:21:38,800 --> 00:21:41,079
You're kidding.
Yeah, come on, educate me.
303
00:21:41,080 --> 00:21:42,119
What for?
304
00:21:42,120 --> 00:21:44,080
Cos I wanna know.
Yeah, but what for?
305
00:21:46,440 --> 00:21:48,039
Cos your mum thinks we should
talk more,
306
00:21:48,040 --> 00:21:50,000
but she doesn't see it -
307
00:21:53,640 --> 00:21:57,799
...fucking insolence on your face
when you talk to me.
308
00:21:57,800 --> 00:21:59,400
DOORBELL
309
00:22:06,600 --> 00:22:09,319
Aye, aye. Sorry, I know. I've locked
myself out.
310
00:22:09,320 --> 00:22:14,239
I was just putting something
in the bin and then, click.
311
00:22:14,240 --> 00:22:15,679
Go on, give us your key then.
312
00:22:15,680 --> 00:22:17,119
You said you had a spare key,
313
00:22:17,120 --> 00:22:18,919
you might as well give it to me,
mightn't you?
314
00:22:18,920 --> 00:22:20,599
What's your alarm code?
315
00:22:20,600 --> 00:22:23,119
Er, OK. 1502.
316
00:22:23,120 --> 00:22:26,679
1502. Remember George. 1502.
317
00:22:26,680 --> 00:22:28,599
God, he's got a nice life next door,
318
00:22:28,600 --> 00:22:30,679
hasn't he? Swanning around all
hours.
319
00:22:30,680 --> 00:22:32,039
What've you done now?
320
00:22:32,040 --> 00:22:33,359
His key. Like when his alarm went
321
00:22:33,360 --> 00:22:34,839
off last time when he was
on holiday,
322
00:22:34,840 --> 00:22:37,799
now we won't have to put up with it.
323
00:22:37,800 --> 00:22:39,199
What was it?
324
00:22:39,200 --> 00:22:41,120
1502. 1502.
325
00:22:42,400 --> 00:22:44,040
That's his alarm.
326
00:22:54,600 --> 00:22:56,960
DOOR SLAMS
327
00:24:37,960 --> 00:24:39,559
They use titanium in the engine
328
00:24:39,560 --> 00:24:41,439
and the bonnet is carbon fibre,
329
00:24:41,440 --> 00:24:43,559
and the whole thing feels so light,
330
00:24:43,560 --> 00:24:45,559
it's like a stiff breeze could blow
it away,
331
00:24:45,560 --> 00:24:48,679
except it grips like crazy.
332
00:24:48,680 --> 00:24:50,959
The traction control is astonishing.
333
00:24:50,960 --> 00:24:53,279
It can detect wheelspin in
a microsecond.
334
00:24:53,280 --> 00:24:54,719
Less than a microsecond.
335
00:24:54,720 --> 00:24:57,679
It almost detects
a spin before it's even happened.
336
00:24:57,680 --> 00:25:01,000
I've never felt safer.
I've never felt more secure.
337
00:25:23,040 --> 00:25:25,479
What are you doing in his house?
George?
338
00:25:25,480 --> 00:25:27,199
Hey, answer me.
What are you doing in here?
339
00:25:27,200 --> 00:25:28,679
I said there was someone in this
house.
340
00:25:28,680 --> 00:25:30,199
I said so! He's been using the key.
341
00:25:30,200 --> 00:25:31,799
What do you mean?
Did you know he was here?
342
00:25:31,800 --> 00:25:33,599
Did I fuck! But I knew there was
someone in this house.
343
00:25:33,600 --> 00:25:34,719
He's been drinking my wine.
344
00:25:34,720 --> 00:25:36,119
The level on the wine goes down
every day.
345
00:25:36,120 --> 00:25:38,519
Why are you talking about wine?
What's wine got to do with it?
346
00:25:38,520 --> 00:25:40,999
No, you don't.
Don't try to get away with this.
347
00:25:41,000 --> 00:25:42,599
Don't you touch him?
He's in my house!
348
00:25:42,600 --> 00:25:43,839
Don't you fucking dare?
349
00:25:43,840 --> 00:25:45,239
HE'S IN MY HOUSE!
350
00:25:45,240 --> 00:25:49,719
I gave you my key,
which he's gone and stolen.
351
00:25:49,720 --> 00:25:51,119
Did you say he was in here every
day? Yeah.
352
00:25:51,120 --> 00:25:52,399
Drinking wine every single day?
353
00:25:52,400 --> 00:25:54,159
Yeah, and God knows what else,
because your son...
354
00:25:54,160 --> 00:25:55,400
Is he drinking wine with you?
355
00:25:56,720 --> 00:25:58,279
What?
356
00:25:58,280 --> 00:25:59,800
Fuck!
357
00:26:01,400 --> 00:26:02,960
George!
358
00:26:04,200 --> 00:26:06,759
George. Get here.
359
00:26:06,760 --> 00:26:08,280
Eh!
360
00:26:11,280 --> 00:26:12,959
Don't lock me out.
361
00:26:12,960 --> 00:26:17,479
Your son has been wanking
in my house.
362
00:26:17,480 --> 00:26:18,680
George!
363
00:26:22,280 --> 00:26:24,360
Oh, God! Don't kill him!
364
00:26:26,400 --> 00:26:29,999
Tell me,
what you doing in that man's house?
365
00:26:30,000 --> 00:26:32,119
What were you doing in his house?
Did he invite you in?
366
00:26:32,120 --> 00:26:34,279
What's that supposed to mean?
Did he invite you?
367
00:26:34,280 --> 00:26:35,439
BANGING ON DOOR
368
00:26:35,440 --> 00:26:36,959
Clive! Open the door!
Your boyfriend wants you.
369
00:26:36,960 --> 00:26:38,119
Don't be so stupid.
370
00:26:38,120 --> 00:26:39,479
Oh, I'm always the stupid one,
aren't I?
371
00:26:39,480 --> 00:26:40,839
Clive, open the door!
372
00:26:40,840 --> 00:26:41,959
BANGING CONTINUES
373
00:26:41,960 --> 00:26:44,000
Clive, open the door!
374
00:26:46,000 --> 00:26:47,319
God, you couldn't leave him
alone, eh?
375
00:26:47,320 --> 00:26:48,959
OK, this is all
a bit out of control.
376
00:26:48,960 --> 00:26:51,359
We can sort it out.
I just want to see George.
377
00:26:51,360 --> 00:26:53,599
I just want to talk him,
like adults, OK?
378
00:26:53,600 --> 00:26:56,079
And I want my key, because you
were in charge of it, Clive,
379
00:26:56,080 --> 00:26:57,399
and I want it back.
380
00:26:57,400 --> 00:26:58,639
I'm sorry, all right?
381
00:26:58,640 --> 00:27:00,400
George, don't you dare!
382
00:27:01,720 --> 00:27:03,919
Get here!
383
00:27:03,920 --> 00:27:07,679
Hey! George, get back here!
384
00:27:07,680 --> 00:27:08,840
Hey!
385
00:27:12,360 --> 00:27:14,440
You'll have to come back in
the end.
386
00:27:25,320 --> 00:27:27,599
He needs a bollocking,
because, you know,
387
00:27:27,600 --> 00:27:30,400
I mean, we all make mistakes,
but he has crossed a line here.
388
00:27:34,680 --> 00:27:36,879
What was he doing in your house?
389
00:27:36,880 --> 00:27:39,239
What was my boy doing in your house,
390
00:27:39,240 --> 00:27:41,120
for days and days?
391
00:27:42,280 --> 00:27:43,919
He's 16 years old.
392
00:27:43,920 --> 00:27:46,560
OK, see you later,
then. Bye.
393
00:27:51,960 --> 00:27:53,399
Your son George... Don't!
394
00:27:53,400 --> 00:27:57,240
Your son George stole my key
and waited till I left.
395
00:27:58,680 --> 00:28:00,799
Because if I knew he was there,
396
00:28:00,800 --> 00:28:06,040
why the fuck would I walk up
to my front door with you?
397
00:28:08,280 --> 00:28:09,759
No, no, no, no, no, wait.
398
00:28:09,760 --> 00:28:12,359
So he was breaking and entering,
399
00:28:12,360 --> 00:28:13,519
he stole things,
400
00:28:13,520 --> 00:28:16,639
he masturbated in front
of my television,
401
00:28:16,640 --> 00:28:18,439
and these are all on
the list of things I am telling
402
00:28:18,440 --> 00:28:21,360
the police,
including your assault of me.
403
00:28:22,840 --> 00:28:26,360
Because if you're gonna take on this
fucking poof...
404
00:28:31,560 --> 00:28:32,760
...don't you...
405
00:28:34,000 --> 00:28:36,000
...don't you say...
406
00:28:38,440 --> 00:28:40,480
Don't you ever!
407
00:28:50,640 --> 00:28:52,479
Jesus! Fuck!
408
00:28:52,480 --> 00:28:54,279
Aghhh!
409
00:28:54,280 --> 00:28:55,879
What?
410
00:28:55,880 --> 00:28:57,640
What...?
411
00:29:09,840 --> 00:29:13,639
Boss? Judy, tell Saul to pack his
stuff up and get out.
412
00:29:13,640 --> 00:29:16,639
You will not believe what his father
has just done!
413
00:29:16,640 --> 00:29:18,039
You're a beautiful lad, Saul,
414
00:29:18,040 --> 00:29:20,679
but I'm afraid you've gotta go.
And if you wanna know why,
415
00:29:20,680 --> 00:29:21,959
blame your mad old dad.
416
00:29:21,960 --> 00:29:24,239
No, you need to come home.
They said Dad went crazy.
417
00:29:24,240 --> 00:29:26,559
Like, George was in next
door's house.
418
00:29:26,560 --> 00:29:29,599
He broke in and he was stark naked.
419
00:29:29,600 --> 00:29:31,679
Bushra, I've got to go.
So, where's George now?
420
00:29:31,680 --> 00:29:33,359
I don't know, do I? I'm still here.
421
00:29:33,360 --> 00:29:35,199
He actually attacked you?
422
00:29:35,200 --> 00:29:36,959
Yeah.
423
00:29:36,960 --> 00:29:40,079
That is assault,
and you have to go to the police.
424
00:29:40,080 --> 00:29:43,479
I don't even have my car. I left it
in town. I'm stuck here.
425
00:29:43,480 --> 00:29:45,439
Can you come and drive me in?
426
00:29:45,440 --> 00:29:46,840
I'm coming.
427
00:29:48,800 --> 00:29:51,919
Somebody tell me...! What the hell?
428
00:29:51,920 --> 00:29:55,719
He's gonna call the police, because
you assaulted him, Clive!
429
00:29:55,720 --> 00:30:00,120
Him and snotty bitch Stephanie,
they're gonna call the police.
430
00:30:02,680 --> 00:30:06,920
MUFFLED ARGUMENT
431
00:30:32,560 --> 00:30:34,359
Cheers. Cheers.
432
00:30:34,360 --> 00:30:37,039
You should have a vodka in that.
433
00:30:37,040 --> 00:30:38,519
I've gotta take the car home.
434
00:30:38,520 --> 00:30:39,759
And I'm trying to stay alert.
435
00:30:39,760 --> 00:30:42,239
I have a thief living next door,
and a thug.
436
00:30:42,240 --> 00:30:44,999
Really, you should call the police
though. Really, really.
437
00:30:45,000 --> 00:30:47,799
I know, I know. You should. But,
like, I'm thinking of me. I mean,
438
00:30:47,800 --> 00:30:49,439
what if it got into the court?
I mean,
439
00:30:49,440 --> 00:30:52,919
gay man with a 16-year-old boy in my
house? What would that look like?
440
00:30:52,920 --> 00:30:55,479
He broke in. Yeah, but look at the
reaction of his dad, huh?
441
00:30:55,480 --> 00:30:59,239
Anything to do with George, you
know.
442
00:30:59,240 --> 00:31:02,919
Then I'm a groomer and a paedo
and a pervert. Oh, don't.
443
00:31:02,920 --> 00:31:05,399
That gets online, there's five
million straight men
444
00:31:05,400 --> 00:31:06,479
waiting to attack me.
445
00:31:06,480 --> 00:31:08,479
Plenty of straight women.
446
00:31:08,480 --> 00:31:10,399
What makes you say that?
447
00:31:10,400 --> 00:31:11,839
The world.
448
00:31:11,840 --> 00:31:13,279
And you know who would love
this story?
449
00:31:13,280 --> 00:31:16,399
The Licensing Unit.
Oh, the council would leap on it,
450
00:31:16,400 --> 00:31:18,519
then this place would be in trouble.
451
00:31:18,520 --> 00:31:21,200
If I go to the police,
it will only get worse.
452
00:31:23,680 --> 00:31:25,479
To be fair to little George,
453
00:31:25,480 --> 00:31:27,839
he did just want a safe place
to wank.
454
00:31:27,840 --> 00:31:29,519
Because men will do it anywhere.
455
00:31:29,520 --> 00:31:30,799
I've been studying this for years,
456
00:31:30,800 --> 00:31:33,199
it's my specialist subject.
And I have gotta tell you,
457
00:31:33,200 --> 00:31:35,999
girls, men will do it everywhere,
all day long.
458
00:31:36,000 --> 00:31:38,119
You name it,
they have spunked on it.
459
00:31:38,120 --> 00:31:41,239
Cinema seats, theatres, graveyards,
460
00:31:41,240 --> 00:31:42,919
cars. Every single car,
461
00:31:42,920 --> 00:31:45,599
they've whacked off into every
single seat.
462
00:31:45,600 --> 00:31:48,799
I used to carry a handkerchief to
wipe down seats on the bus,
463
00:31:48,800 --> 00:31:52,759
I'm now considering
a beekeeper's outfit. Aeroplanes.
464
00:31:52,760 --> 00:31:55,719
In the seats, the dirty dogs!
465
00:31:55,720 --> 00:31:57,319
Seats, toilets, cockpits.
466
00:31:57,320 --> 00:31:59,999
That's what turbulence is!
467
00:32:00,000 --> 00:32:03,439
I am telling you, they have been
fiddling away all through history.
468
00:32:03,440 --> 00:32:06,039
You ask Sir Edmund Hilary
if he tugged off on
469
00:32:06,040 --> 00:32:07,279
the top of Everest,
470
00:32:07,280 --> 00:32:08,999
and he would say, yes...
471
00:32:09,000 --> 00:32:10,799
..because it was there.!
472
00:32:10,800 --> 00:32:13,679
Christopher Columbus, he discovered
America so he could find a new place
473
00:32:13,680 --> 00:32:15,599
to whack it out.
474
00:32:15,600 --> 00:32:17,399
Neil Armstrong, one small step,
475
00:32:17,400 --> 00:32:19,119
one massive wank.
476
00:32:19,120 --> 00:32:21,199
And then he varnished the Moon.
477
00:32:21,200 --> 00:32:26,079
I'm telling you, two basic rules.
One, never sit down,
478
00:32:26,080 --> 00:32:28,279
and two, don't go barefoot,
479
00:32:28,280 --> 00:32:31,359
cos we are standing on
a carpet of glue,
480
00:32:31,360 --> 00:32:34,079
and if we could see life through
UV glasses,
481
00:32:34,080 --> 00:32:37,159
the whole world would look like
a melted candle.
482
00:32:37,160 --> 00:32:39,119
Ooh. Fair do's to George!
483
00:32:39,120 --> 00:32:41,479
He was maintaining a fine tradition.
484
00:32:41,480 --> 00:32:43,880
To George.
To George!
485
00:32:47,440 --> 00:32:49,720
He was round at Sammy's.
486
00:32:50,960 --> 00:32:52,760
Hiding like a chicken.
487
00:32:55,040 --> 00:32:57,799
You're supposed to be
the clever one.
488
00:32:57,800 --> 00:33:01,319
But if Leo presses charges
and you get a criminal record,
489
00:33:01,320 --> 00:33:04,879
you won't get into university.
490
00:33:04,880 --> 00:33:07,519
That's not true, actually.
Sherry from down the road,
491
00:33:07,520 --> 00:33:08,919
she got caught shoplifting,
492
00:33:08,920 --> 00:33:11,519
and now she's doing economics.
493
00:33:11,520 --> 00:33:13,559
Which is funny, if you think about
it.
494
00:33:13,560 --> 00:33:17,279
Thank you. Now, button it.
495
00:33:17,280 --> 00:33:20,239
You will go and apologise.
496
00:33:20,240 --> 00:33:22,119
You'll apologise in person,
497
00:33:22,120 --> 00:33:24,919
and I want you to write him a
letter. Fuck off!
498
00:33:24,920 --> 00:33:26,480
Don't you dare!
499
00:33:28,080 --> 00:33:31,279
You'll write a formal apology.
500
00:33:31,280 --> 00:33:33,399
Plus you can add up how much you owe
him with all
501
00:33:33,400 --> 00:33:35,759
the wine and stuff,
then double it and pay him back,
502
00:33:35,760 --> 00:33:38,040
and then... and then...
503
00:33:48,120 --> 00:33:50,680
Then you can tell us
why you did it.
504
00:33:51,800 --> 00:33:55,080
I mean, I'm not stupid, I get it,
OK?
505
00:33:56,400 --> 00:33:58,799
When I was a kid,
I had a key to my nan's,
506
00:33:58,800 --> 00:34:00,799
and I would bunk off
507
00:34:00,800 --> 00:34:03,919
and sit in her flat when she was out
on Thursday afternoons,
508
00:34:03,920 --> 00:34:06,799
and I did that for five years,
and no-one knew a thing.
509
00:34:06,800 --> 00:34:08,279
But that was family.
510
00:34:08,280 --> 00:34:10,160
He's the man next door.
511
00:34:11,480 --> 00:34:12,799
Did he ask you in? Shut up.
512
00:34:12,800 --> 00:34:14,759
He gave us his key,
didn't he? It's an open door.
513
00:34:14,760 --> 00:34:18,959
And... and you're too young to know
when you're being, like, seduced.
514
00:34:18,960 --> 00:34:20,440
Don't be so stupid!
515
00:34:21,920 --> 00:34:23,560
It's a good point.
516
00:34:26,800 --> 00:34:29,359
Cos Leo is a bit out there.
517
00:34:29,360 --> 00:34:32,999
He's a bit obvious.
And if he does call the police,
518
00:34:33,000 --> 00:34:36,159
it would be a good line
to take in court.
519
00:34:36,160 --> 00:34:39,319
He's a homosexual man choosing
520
00:34:39,320 --> 00:34:42,440
to live ten feet away from
two healthy lads.
521
00:34:43,600 --> 00:34:45,000
Two healthy...
522
00:34:46,480 --> 00:34:49,199
...sexy lads, let's say it.
523
00:34:49,200 --> 00:34:51,719
He looks at me sometimes. Does he?
524
00:34:51,720 --> 00:34:54,199
I catch him, now and then,
525
00:34:54,200 --> 00:34:57,799
eyeing me up. He can't help himself.
526
00:34:57,800 --> 00:34:59,119
Well, that could be useful.
527
00:34:59,120 --> 00:35:01,279
God, you are just idiots!
528
00:35:01,280 --> 00:35:03,999
Do you know why I went there?
529
00:35:04,000 --> 00:35:06,279
To get away from you lot!
530
00:35:06,280 --> 00:35:08,319
To get away from this house!
531
00:35:08,320 --> 00:35:10,480
To get away from you!
532
00:35:12,280 --> 00:35:13,959
Well, you're grounded.
533
00:35:13,960 --> 00:35:17,119
And don't think you can go round
to Hassan's,
534
00:35:17,120 --> 00:35:19,239
because I'm phoning his mother.
I warn you, George.
535
00:35:19,240 --> 00:35:21,039
She'll send you right back.
536
00:35:21,040 --> 00:35:22,200
Have you got that?
537
00:35:29,480 --> 00:35:30,679
I tell you what, darling,
538
00:35:30,680 --> 00:35:32,839
you'd better get your locks changed.
539
00:35:32,840 --> 00:35:35,039
Might be wise, just in case.
540
00:35:35,040 --> 00:35:38,599
Such a hassle. Oh,
God, I've got the key safe, too.
541
00:35:38,600 --> 00:35:40,360
I'll have to change everything.
542
00:35:44,280 --> 00:35:46,560
ALARM BEEPS
543
00:35:48,640 --> 00:35:50,960
BEEPING STOPS
544
00:36:51,800 --> 00:36:54,319
POP MUSIC STARTS
545
00:36:54,320 --> 00:36:56,000
MUSIC STOPS
546
00:37:29,360 --> 00:37:33,839
Do you think he went through your
things, little Georgy Porgy?
547
00:37:33,840 --> 00:37:34,959
What, like my pants?
548
00:37:34,960 --> 00:37:36,799
Mm. I would.
549
00:37:36,800 --> 00:37:38,479
Oh, God! Do you think he did?
550
00:37:38,480 --> 00:37:40,560
Why? What would he find?
551
00:38:13,160 --> 00:38:15,439
Boss, I was thinking,
did you check your computer?
552
00:38:15,440 --> 00:38:17,840
No, it's good, it's locked,
it's got a password.
553
00:38:19,040 --> 00:38:21,760
Although if I leave
the email open, it stays unlocked.
554
00:38:34,360 --> 00:38:35,600
NOTIFICATION TONE
555
00:38:53,640 --> 00:38:55,519
I'll tell you one
thing bothering me.
556
00:38:55,520 --> 00:38:57,359
That night you were texting George.
557
00:38:57,360 --> 00:38:59,559
So? I was being kind.
558
00:38:59,560 --> 00:39:00,879
Yeah, I know,
559
00:39:00,880 --> 00:39:02,239
but if his mum and dad demand
560
00:39:02,240 --> 00:39:04,519
to know everything
and George shows it to them.
561
00:39:04,520 --> 00:39:07,439
But I said nice things.
562
00:39:07,440 --> 00:39:09,799
Oh, God, I left a voice note.
563
00:39:09,800 --> 00:39:12,439
George, I swear, if you tell
your girlfriends about this,
564
00:39:12,440 --> 00:39:15,119
they will tell you that every single
stupid boy does this
565
00:39:15,120 --> 00:39:17,479
and you'll laugh about it.
566
00:39:17,480 --> 00:39:19,399
Because there's such
a big world out there,
567
00:39:19,400 --> 00:39:21,319
and you can have boyfriends
or girlfriends,
568
00:39:21,320 --> 00:39:22,839
or whatever you like.
569
00:39:22,840 --> 00:39:27,479
You can have all the wild
and crazy hot sex you want,
570
00:39:27,480 --> 00:39:30,359
night after night.
Because I promise you Geroge,
571
00:39:30,360 --> 00:39:36,080
there's a great big gay life,
just waiting for you.
572
00:39:46,920 --> 00:39:49,519
So, if I delete it,
will it delete on George's thread?
573
00:39:49,520 --> 00:39:51,800
Yes. Now, get rid of it.
574
00:39:55,560 --> 00:39:56,720
Oh, shit.
575
00:40:06,440 --> 00:40:08,599
Boss, I sent you that password
generator. It's free
576
00:40:08,600 --> 00:40:10,119
and it's brilliant. Thanks, Mikey.
577
00:40:10,120 --> 00:40:12,319
Oh, well, you weren't so helpful
this afternoon, were you?
578
00:40:12,320 --> 00:40:14,159
I was pointing out the obvious.
579
00:40:14,160 --> 00:40:16,559
What? He posted Saul's wanking video
on the group chat.
580
00:40:16,560 --> 00:40:19,120
Oh, yeah. What? Saul the other son?
581
00:40:26,480 --> 00:40:29,320
SAUL PANTS AND GASPS
582
00:40:30,360 --> 00:40:32,919
He gets it all out online.
Saul bares all.
583
00:40:32,920 --> 00:40:35,840
It's ten out of ten,
and I mean ten.
584
00:40:42,640 --> 00:40:44,039
It's not private,
it's a business,
585
00:40:44,040 --> 00:40:45,479
and he chooses to promote himself.
586
00:40:45,480 --> 00:40:48,439
It's not even up for debate.
He's your neighbour's son.
587
00:40:48,440 --> 00:40:49,479
He's 25.
588
00:40:49,480 --> 00:40:51,559
He's only 25.
589
00:40:51,560 --> 00:40:53,639
He sells it, he wants us to see.
590
00:40:53,640 --> 00:40:54,919
Is that on your phone?
591
00:40:54,920 --> 00:40:57,119
It's on everyone's.
Well, then you should delete it.
592
00:40:57,120 --> 00:40:58,679
If I end up taking Clive Goss
to court,
593
00:40:58,680 --> 00:41:01,119
the behaviour of his son could be
very good evidence.
594
00:41:01,120 --> 00:41:03,959
Leo, just don't have it anywhere.
595
00:41:03,960 --> 00:41:06,039
Come on, it's not like I fancy him
596
00:41:06,040 --> 00:41:07,959
or anything. Well, not much.
597
00:41:07,960 --> 00:41:09,680
Oh, God!
598
00:41:10,760 --> 00:41:13,200
I'll delete it. I'll delete it.
599
00:41:21,800 --> 00:41:23,559
This is what they do.
MESSAGE PINGS
600
00:41:23,560 --> 00:41:26,239
They make a link between gay men
and children...
601
00:41:26,240 --> 00:41:28,679
MESSAGE PINGS
...and that link is ineradicable.
602
00:41:28,680 --> 00:41:30,279
It cannot be removed.
MESSAGE PINGS
603
00:41:30,280 --> 00:41:32,759
And they know that, the bastards.
MESSAGE PINGS
604
00:41:32,760 --> 00:41:35,159
So, they repeat it, they shout it...
MESSAGE PINGS
605
00:41:35,160 --> 00:41:37,519
...over and over,
and louder and louder.
606
00:41:37,520 --> 00:41:39,159
Well, that's nice. Thanks, boss.
607
00:41:39,160 --> 00:41:40,639
What did we do to deserve that?
608
00:41:40,640 --> 00:41:42,039
What do you mean?
609
00:41:42,040 --> 00:41:43,639
Your message, on the group chat.
610
00:41:43,640 --> 00:41:45,159
Guilty as charged.
611
00:41:45,160 --> 00:41:46,999
That's on my CV, Mr Struthers.
612
00:41:47,000 --> 00:41:48,199
What? What's just happened?
613
00:41:48,200 --> 00:41:49,839
He's just called us all perverts.
614
00:41:49,840 --> 00:41:51,359
I didn't say that. Look.
615
00:41:51,360 --> 00:41:53,480
WHOOPS AND CHEERS
Why would I do that?
616
00:41:54,520 --> 00:41:56,519
Look, look, there's the time.
That's now.
617
00:41:56,520 --> 00:41:58,279
12 minutes past, right now.
And you saw me,
618
00:41:58,280 --> 00:41:59,759
I was sitting here.
I didn't send it.
619
00:41:59,760 --> 00:42:02,319
You must've been on dictation.
You must've pressed it by mistake.
620
00:42:02,320 --> 00:42:04,639
You did say perverts out loud.
621
00:42:04,640 --> 00:42:06,519
But it's not that bad, Melba.
622
00:42:06,520 --> 00:42:07,839
I've got this couple in Levenshulme,
623
00:42:07,840 --> 00:42:10,959
Blake and Robbie,
they've just adopted three children.
624
00:42:10,960 --> 00:42:13,239
They'd never have been able
to do that back in the day,
625
00:42:13,240 --> 00:42:15,280
so things are better.
626
00:42:36,520 --> 00:42:37,639
Ohhh!
627
00:42:37,640 --> 00:42:39,040
PHONE BUZZES
628
00:43:12,920 --> 00:43:15,840
All right, you lot,
got a surprise for you today.
629
00:43:19,040 --> 00:43:20,799
I love my job, man!
630
00:43:20,800 --> 00:43:21,919
Say hi, Molly.
631
00:43:21,920 --> 00:43:23,199
Hi!
632
00:43:23,200 --> 00:43:25,679
How hot, is she? Oh, my God!
633
00:43:25,680 --> 00:43:27,160
Here we go.
634
00:43:46,960 --> 00:43:48,760
This is for you, girls.
635
00:43:49,840 --> 00:43:51,880
And some of you fellas.
636
00:43:55,560 --> 00:43:57,120
Uhhh!
637
00:44:28,560 --> 00:44:31,799
OK, it's been a long day.
638
00:44:31,800 --> 00:44:35,239
Good luck, troops.
Keep flying the flag.
639
00:44:35,240 --> 00:44:37,639
Seriously, though, be careful.
640
00:44:37,640 --> 00:44:39,359
What now?
641
00:44:39,360 --> 00:44:41,999
Your phone! Texting a teenager!
642
00:44:42,000 --> 00:44:44,479
Oi, I didn't do anything wrong.
643
00:44:44,480 --> 00:44:47,119
There's nothing like that on
my phone, Leo.
644
00:44:47,120 --> 00:44:51,239
Sometimes I think you lot are
so full of all your freedoms,
645
00:44:51,240 --> 00:44:52,960
you don't know when to stop.
646
00:45:05,120 --> 00:45:06,720
Aghhh!
647
00:45:20,320 --> 00:45:25,200
Ever Fallen in Love (With
Someone You Shouldn't've) by
Buzzcocks
648
00:45:30,680 --> 00:45:33,479
♪ You spurn my natural emotions
649
00:45:33,480 --> 00:45:38,640
♪ You make me feel I'm dirt,
and I'm hurt
650
00:45:41,680 --> 00:45:43,999
♪ And if I start a commotion
651
00:45:44,000 --> 00:45:48,360
♪ I run the risk of losing you
And that's worse... ♪
652
00:45:58,080 --> 00:46:01,440
Is this you? Is this your lot?
653
00:46:03,640 --> 00:46:06,640
MUSIC CONTINUES FAINTLY
654
00:46:15,280 --> 00:46:18,799
♪ Ever fallen in love with someone?
Ever fallen in love?
655
00:46:18,800 --> 00:46:21,920
♪ In love with someone
Ever fallen in love... ♪
47161
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