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1
00:00:19,200 --> 00:00:21,400
Are you having another one
of your stupid dates?
2
00:00:22,440 --> 00:00:23,440
Obviously not.
3
00:00:23,520 --> 00:00:24,640
So what are you doing here?
4
00:00:25,520 --> 00:00:26,640
What do you think?
5
00:00:26,720 --> 00:00:28,920
You can come here all you like,
she's not going to come.
6
00:00:29,880 --> 00:00:31,960
-Who's not going to come?
-Who do you think?
7
00:00:32,560 --> 00:00:34,560
Dad, accept it
Marta has moved on
8
00:00:34,640 --> 00:00:37,000
-and you should do the same.
-It's not so easy.
9
00:00:37,080 --> 00:00:39,600
If you keep coming back here,
of course not.
10
00:00:40,680 --> 00:00:43,200
Anyway, why do you think
she'd come here?
11
00:00:44,280 --> 00:00:46,680
Be... Because this is
our spot.
12
00:00:47,240 --> 00:00:49,480
And does she know
it's your spot?
13
00:00:50,000 --> 00:00:51,400
If not here, then where?
14
00:01:23,120 --> 00:01:25,160
"Don Joaquín, how are things?"
15
00:01:25,240 --> 00:01:26,560
Please!
16
00:01:26,640 --> 00:01:28,240
Great, fine, all good.
17
00:01:28,320 --> 00:01:29,960
"Marieta is still in bed."
18
00:01:30,720 --> 00:01:31,720
Ah.
19
00:01:32,240 --> 00:01:35,480
The same as the girl
I picked up on Tinder.
20
00:01:35,560 --> 00:01:37,000
Just where I left her, exhausted,
21
00:01:38,240 --> 00:01:39,400
in bed.
22
00:01:39,600 --> 00:01:40,600
Hello.
23
00:01:40,680 --> 00:01:41,800
-Hello.
-"Is that her?"
24
00:01:41,880 --> 00:01:44,600
-Oh! Hello, don Julio!
-"How are things?"
25
00:01:44,680 --> 00:01:46,240
Shut it, shut it,
26
00:01:46,320 --> 00:01:48,480
-or you'll wake her!
-Mum?
27
00:01:49,400 --> 00:01:53,600
"No. The girlfriend your father says
he's got hidden away."
28
00:01:54,480 --> 00:01:56,040
-Is Amparo here?
-Which Amparo?
29
00:01:56,120 --> 00:01:57,360
From Tinder.
30
00:01:57,680 --> 00:01:59,240
Oh!
31
00:01:59,320 --> 00:02:01,000
Amparo, Amparo.
32
00:02:01,080 --> 00:02:03,960
There are so many
I get their names mixed up.
33
00:02:04,040 --> 00:02:07,160
Because... C'mon, let's go, let's go.
C'mon, go and have breakfast.
34
00:02:07,360 --> 00:02:08,600
It's 3 o'clock here.
35
00:02:08,680 --> 00:02:11,080
C'mon, kidder, off you go
go, go, go!
36
00:02:11,560 --> 00:02:13,360
"Okay. What did you want to say to me?"
37
00:02:13,640 --> 00:02:15,040
To you? Nothing.
38
00:02:15,120 --> 00:02:16,360
"You called me."
39
00:02:16,440 --> 00:02:19,800
"The rabbit always wants something
when it pokes its nose out of the warren."
40
00:02:19,960 --> 00:02:21,000
Well, yes.
41
00:02:21,080 --> 00:02:22,080
I wanted...
42
00:02:22,360 --> 00:02:23,760
to speak to my grand-daughter.
43
00:02:24,080 --> 00:02:26,480
"She's sleepy because we got back
44
00:02:26,560 --> 00:02:28,520
from Cancun last night."
45
00:02:28,880 --> 00:02:30,440
Uh, from Cancun.
46
00:02:30,920 --> 00:02:33,520
And I took you on our honeymoon
to Benidorm.
47
00:02:33,600 --> 00:02:35,360
"Three days in Benidorm."
48
00:02:35,920 --> 00:02:37,920
Yes, but we had a laugh, didn't we?
49
00:02:38,880 --> 00:02:42,400
They wantedus out of the hotel
as we didn't have the family book.
50
00:02:42,480 --> 00:02:44,760
"Oh yes! So embarrassing!"
51
00:02:44,920 --> 00:02:47,560
"When you said you wanted a
double room,
52
00:02:47,640 --> 00:02:49,840
with a double bed."
53
00:02:50,200 --> 00:02:51,240
"Excuse me."
54
00:02:52,320 --> 00:02:54,080
-Sure.
-"Breakfast, my love."
55
00:02:54,320 --> 00:02:56,000
"The chilaquiles are getting cold."
56
00:02:56,080 --> 00:02:57,160
"Oh, yes!"
57
00:02:57,520 --> 00:02:59,080
"Well, Joaquín, bye."
58
00:02:59,200 --> 00:03:00,560
One moment, hey, it's...
59
00:03:05,880 --> 00:03:09,040
It doesn't matter if you've had
three lousy dates.
60
00:03:09,240 --> 00:03:11,360
I've had more than 15 and
they we're all a disaster.
61
00:03:11,560 --> 00:03:14,000
My life is like a bad
version of First Dates.
62
00:03:14,080 --> 00:03:15,840
Since you split up with Javi,
63
00:03:15,920 --> 00:03:18,120
all your dates have
gone badly.
64
00:03:18,200 --> 00:03:19,680
Before Javi, it was worse.
65
00:03:19,760 --> 00:03:22,560
The last one was Abracitos,
who jilted you at the altar.
66
00:03:22,640 --> 00:03:24,200
I'm jinxed?
67
00:03:24,280 --> 00:03:25,840
No way. You're not jinxed.
68
00:03:25,920 --> 00:03:28,520
That's love and sex
after 35.
69
00:03:28,600 --> 00:03:31,560
Welcome. I'm going to start
a Tinder account for you.
70
00:03:31,760 --> 00:03:33,960
Javi, you've had more than ten
dates this month
71
00:03:34,040 --> 00:03:35,640
and you ran away from them all.
72
00:03:35,720 --> 00:03:38,040
No. I just walked out of the
restaurant on the last one.
73
00:03:38,120 --> 00:03:39,320
I began to run outside.
74
00:03:40,160 --> 00:03:42,920
Guys like you
give the rest of us a bad name.
75
00:03:43,320 --> 00:03:45,680
I'd say you're making a good job
of that on your own.
76
00:03:45,920 --> 00:03:47,640
The worst thing is I've run out
of diary.
77
00:03:47,720 --> 00:03:50,680
You're not with it. Drop
the notebooks and get on Tinder.
78
00:03:50,760 --> 00:03:52,520
Please, that's awful!
79
00:03:52,600 --> 00:03:56,160
Young folks who just want
to get laid
80
00:03:56,240 --> 00:03:57,560
and, then, bye bye.
81
00:03:57,640 --> 00:03:59,040
See? It's all good.
82
00:03:59,240 --> 00:04:01,000
I don't understand
what you're doing on Tinder.
83
00:04:01,080 --> 00:04:02,360
If your wife finds out...
84
00:04:02,960 --> 00:04:05,080
No, no, no.
It's just a wee hobby.
85
00:04:05,160 --> 00:04:07,320
I've got a false profile,
just so I can have a look.
86
00:04:07,400 --> 00:04:10,280
Me too. Well, sometimes I
arrange a date, but I don't go.
87
00:04:10,480 --> 00:04:12,280
It's just for the thrill of
knowing I can.
88
00:04:12,360 --> 00:04:13,600
Great idea!
89
00:04:13,680 --> 00:04:15,200
That's cleared up your doubts.
90
00:04:15,280 --> 00:04:18,160
They're all nutters.
Look, I'm not doing Tinder.
91
00:04:18,520 --> 00:04:21,200
Babe, your problem is that your
still hung up on Javi,
92
00:04:21,280 --> 00:04:22,440
but it happens to all of us.
93
00:04:22,520 --> 00:04:24,200
You're hung up on Javi as well?
94
00:04:24,280 --> 00:04:27,160
We can all be hung up
on an ex.
95
00:04:27,360 --> 00:04:28,960
I'm not hung up on him.
96
00:04:29,240 --> 00:04:32,200
-You need an uncoupling ritual.
-Pardon?
97
00:04:32,280 --> 00:04:35,560
They gave her a book one of
Jodorosky's books on magic
98
00:04:35,640 --> 00:04:36,800
and she's flipping out.
99
00:04:36,880 --> 00:04:37,880
Who gave it you?
100
00:04:38,200 --> 00:04:39,240
You did.
101
00:04:39,920 --> 00:04:41,400
Well, you're making use if it.
102
00:04:41,480 --> 00:04:43,640
Okay, you have to take a photo
of yourself in bed,
103
00:04:43,880 --> 00:04:45,120
naked, if possible.
104
00:04:45,200 --> 00:04:47,000
Rolling around in
the sheets.
105
00:04:47,080 --> 00:04:49,320
And, after, the picture, in your
fridge.
106
00:04:51,080 --> 00:04:52,520
Shouldn't have given her the book.
107
00:04:53,200 --> 00:04:56,200
And with the "Around me" you find
girls within the radius you like.
108
00:04:56,280 --> 00:04:59,320
We've put 1km to see how many
Tinder girls are around here.
109
00:04:59,400 --> 00:05:01,000
That must be your neighbour. Oh!
110
00:05:01,600 --> 00:05:02,600
This one too.
111
00:05:03,440 --> 00:05:04,680
And it's...
112
00:05:05,480 --> 00:05:07,720
Hey! What's up?
He's been trolled, right?
113
00:05:07,800 --> 00:05:08,800
Let's see, let's see.
114
00:05:08,880 --> 00:05:09,880
-No, no.
-What?
115
00:05:10,680 --> 00:05:12,200
It's my sister!
116
00:05:12,280 --> 00:05:14,080
-Looks like her.
-No, no!
117
00:05:14,160 --> 00:05:17,200
"My name is Claudia, I'm Argentinian
and I love gardening."
118
00:05:17,280 --> 00:05:18,280
Eh...
119
00:05:34,320 --> 00:05:35,440
No, no, no, no!
120
00:05:35,520 --> 00:05:37,480
Hands off my sister,
or I'll kill you!
121
00:05:37,560 --> 00:05:39,280
Wipe her from Tinder.
122
00:05:39,360 --> 00:05:41,680
I can't do that.
She has to do it herself.
123
00:05:41,960 --> 00:05:45,160
David, listen, it doesn't matter
if your sister is on Tinder.
124
00:05:45,240 --> 00:05:47,440
It's perfectly normal.
There are loads of girls. Look.
125
00:05:47,760 --> 00:05:49,200
Susi, Eva,
126
00:05:49,440 --> 00:05:52,760
Raquel, Elisa, Lucía... Elisa?
127
00:05:52,960 --> 00:05:55,240
What's wrong with her?
Why is she on Tinder?
128
00:05:55,320 --> 00:05:56,880
And why is she 700 metres away?
129
00:05:57,120 --> 00:05:59,800
Hey, Javi, with Elisa,
don't even think about it, hey?
130
00:05:59,880 --> 00:06:01,160
That's all we need!
131
00:06:01,240 --> 00:06:04,000
Anyhow, Elisa, she's got... a partner
132
00:06:04,080 --> 00:06:07,120
On Tinder, we've all got a partner.
Tinder is the new Facebook.
133
00:06:08,400 --> 00:06:10,560
They're just
desperate people.
134
00:06:11,240 --> 00:06:12,280
And Marta.
135
00:06:12,360 --> 00:06:14,840
What do you mean Marta? What Marta?
Marta, my Marta?
136
00:06:15,000 --> 00:06:17,920
Your Marta, yes,
she's 200 metres away.
137
00:06:18,480 --> 00:06:21,360
No, I mean, I don't believe
that Marta is into Tinder.
138
00:06:21,680 --> 00:06:24,760
And why is everyone so
close? This shit doesn't work.
139
00:06:32,400 --> 00:06:33,400
It's Marta.
140
00:06:33,680 --> 00:06:36,120
She must have come with Elisa,
who'll be waiting in the car.
141
00:06:36,200 --> 00:06:38,480
They're on their way,
that's why they're on Tinder.
142
00:06:38,560 --> 00:06:40,360
That and because they signed up.
143
00:06:41,080 --> 00:06:43,440
Okay, she must want to speak to me
about something.
144
00:06:43,520 --> 00:06:45,600
Go up to the bedroom
and hide,
145
00:06:45,680 --> 00:06:47,600
no speaking and no listening.
146
00:06:47,760 --> 00:06:49,080
-C'mon!
-Ah!
147
00:06:52,640 --> 00:06:53,800
-Hello.
-Hello.
148
00:06:55,200 --> 00:06:56,200
Can I come in?
149
00:06:56,840 --> 00:06:57,880
Er... No.
150
00:06:58,080 --> 00:06:59,840
It's... I'm with someone.
151
00:07:00,520 --> 00:07:02,120
Yeah. Dressed as a minstrel?
152
00:07:03,600 --> 00:07:05,560
Yes, she likes me to wear
these kind of things.
153
00:07:06,080 --> 00:07:08,000
They like those kind of games,
know what I mean.
154
00:07:08,080 --> 00:07:09,800
Me as a minstrel, she as a nurse...
155
00:07:10,080 --> 00:07:12,080
Off the wall, it's great.
What did you want?
156
00:07:12,160 --> 00:07:13,960
I wanted and still want to come in.
157
00:07:14,680 --> 00:07:18,560
I have to go to the bedroom...
to get something I left.
158
00:07:18,800 --> 00:07:20,640
But you can't
go to the bedroom.
159
00:07:20,720 --> 00:07:23,000
There's someone there and it
would be embarrassing, seriously.
160
00:07:23,200 --> 00:07:24,680
-What's her name?
-Marta.
161
00:07:25,320 --> 00:07:26,920
Wow! That's my name!
162
00:07:27,520 --> 00:07:29,720
Well, yes, there you go,
little coincidences.
163
00:07:34,880 --> 00:07:36,400
Marta, you can't go in there!
164
00:07:36,480 --> 00:07:38,080
No, you can't go in!
165
00:07:38,680 --> 00:07:40,280
What a surprise! No one here!
166
00:07:40,480 --> 00:07:43,160
Or is she hidden in the wardrobe
in her underwear?
167
00:07:43,240 --> 00:07:44,560
-Shall we look?
-Marta, really,
168
00:07:44,640 --> 00:07:46,160
you can't burst into my house this
way.
169
00:07:46,240 --> 00:07:47,800
Tell me what you need and I'll fetch
it.
170
00:07:47,880 --> 00:07:49,000
I don't need anything from you.
171
00:07:49,880 --> 00:07:51,840
I've come to perform an uncoupling
ritual.
172
00:07:52,240 --> 00:07:53,240
What?
173
00:07:53,320 --> 00:07:54,440
Nothing, none of your business.
174
00:07:54,520 --> 00:07:56,280
Give me five minutes and I'll
be off.
175
00:07:56,360 --> 00:07:58,400
Yeah. I prefer to stay to
see what you do.
176
00:07:58,480 --> 00:08:01,240
I'm sure you'd love to,
but I have to do this alone.
177
00:08:01,600 --> 00:08:02,640
-Out.
-Hey...
178
00:09:10,360 --> 00:09:11,680
You can come in now.
179
00:09:14,920 --> 00:09:16,360
Why have you messed up the bed?
180
00:09:17,080 --> 00:09:19,480
The strange thing is you made it
in the first place.
181
00:09:19,560 --> 00:09:20,560
-Bye.
-Eh...
182
00:09:24,240 --> 00:09:25,400
-I didn't see anything.
-Nothing.
183
00:09:25,480 --> 00:09:26,560
-I didn't look.
-I promise.
184
00:09:26,640 --> 00:09:28,800
-Why should I look?
-Seriously, not a glance.
185
00:09:28,880 --> 00:09:30,400
I told you to look.
186
00:09:31,680 --> 00:09:33,960
No, I didn't see anything either.
187
00:09:34,160 --> 00:09:35,720
Did you see anything?
188
00:09:35,800 --> 00:09:37,600
-No.
-Nothing, absolutely nothing.
189
00:09:37,680 --> 00:09:39,000
-We didn't see anything.
-Nothing.
190
00:10:00,360 --> 00:10:02,440
Ah!
What were you doing, calling mum?
191
00:10:02,680 --> 00:10:04,480
What are you saying! Hey!
192
00:10:04,840 --> 00:10:06,920
Did no one teach you to
knock?
193
00:10:07,000 --> 00:10:08,840
I'm sure your mother taught you.
194
00:10:09,160 --> 00:10:11,560
You came to tell me to go
on more Tinder dates.
195
00:10:11,640 --> 00:10:13,240
Maybe today's the day.
196
00:10:13,680 --> 00:10:15,120
And you don't have to come along.
197
00:10:15,280 --> 00:10:17,000
But how could I possibly leave you
alone?
198
00:10:17,080 --> 00:10:18,520
No, no, get off, get off.
199
00:10:18,800 --> 00:10:21,200
Do you remember Benalmádena,
when you were four,
200
00:10:21,280 --> 00:10:23,560
when I threw you in to swim
in the middle of the bay?
201
00:10:24,240 --> 00:10:27,240
Yeah, I'd burst your water
wings without telling you
202
00:10:27,320 --> 00:10:29,000
to see if you could handle it...
203
00:10:30,760 --> 00:10:32,120
You nearly drowned.
204
00:10:33,000 --> 00:10:35,080
No, I don't remember,
but that's
205
00:10:36,040 --> 00:10:37,720
another trauma for the collection.
206
00:10:38,160 --> 00:10:39,160
C'mon.
207
00:10:50,360 --> 00:10:51,920
-Hello.
-Am I that ugly?
208
00:10:52,000 --> 00:10:54,640
No, no, just that, sometimes,
that happens to me.
209
00:10:54,840 --> 00:10:56,320
With another girl.
210
00:10:56,600 --> 00:10:59,240
Well, not that she's a girl,
no... Well...
211
00:10:59,760 --> 00:11:01,800
This time it was you,
and you're not a girl.
212
00:11:01,880 --> 00:11:04,720
I mean, I mean you're
older, you know...
213
00:11:05,320 --> 00:11:09,280
Eh... It wasn't because
you're ugly... or pretty.
214
00:11:09,560 --> 00:11:10,800
I mean, yes, no...
215
00:11:11,120 --> 00:11:13,280
Neither pretty or ugly,
I mean that...
216
00:11:13,680 --> 00:11:14,680
Eh...
217
00:11:14,760 --> 00:11:17,840
Perhaps, you're quite pretty,
but it wasn't me that said it.
218
00:11:19,000 --> 00:11:20,760
My brother warned you about me.
219
00:11:20,840 --> 00:11:23,880
Eh...
Maybe so, but only about 28 times.
220
00:11:23,960 --> 00:11:26,880
He told me to watch out around you,
but only 53 times.
221
00:11:32,400 --> 00:11:33,840
The white one is much better.
222
00:11:34,520 --> 00:11:36,080
-Sorry?
-The shirt.
223
00:11:36,640 --> 00:11:38,000
-Ah!
-The black one is okay
224
00:11:38,080 --> 00:11:40,240
if you have to hide something,
but you're alright
225
00:11:40,680 --> 00:11:42,840
as well, and no longer a
little boy.
226
00:11:43,840 --> 00:11:45,160
Oh, thanks.
227
00:11:45,480 --> 00:11:48,360
And you're not bad
considering you're David's sister.
228
00:11:51,600 --> 00:11:52,640
Eh...
229
00:11:52,720 --> 00:11:55,240
Okay, I have to change.
230
00:11:55,480 --> 00:11:57,520
Another date today! You're a right
Don Juan!
231
00:11:57,600 --> 00:11:59,080
My brother was right.
232
00:12:00,640 --> 00:12:03,040
So, you should take a look
at the greenhouse.
233
00:12:03,800 --> 00:12:04,800
Eh...
234
00:12:05,120 --> 00:12:06,760
As you like to go from one
flower to the next...
235
00:12:08,280 --> 00:12:09,920
Ah, eh...
236
00:12:10,000 --> 00:12:11,880
Sorry, sorry for taking liberties.
237
00:12:11,960 --> 00:12:14,280
I like to mess people around.
I'll be off now.
238
00:12:18,880 --> 00:12:21,440
As soon as you let me have what's
mine, I'll leave.
239
00:12:22,600 --> 00:12:23,600
Eh...
240
00:12:23,680 --> 00:12:26,000
Claudia, I think we should
stop right now.
241
00:12:26,080 --> 00:12:28,240
Maybe it's not a good idea.
242
00:12:28,320 --> 00:12:30,480
I meant the money,
you have to pay me.
243
00:12:30,560 --> 00:12:32,200
I'm the gardener. Don't you
remember?
244
00:12:32,680 --> 00:12:34,320
Ah! Oh... Of course.
245
00:12:34,520 --> 00:12:35,520
It's that...
246
00:12:36,080 --> 00:12:37,400
How daft!...
247
00:12:37,600 --> 00:12:38,600
Okay.
248
00:12:38,800 --> 00:12:40,200
Can you hold it for a second?
249
00:12:42,080 --> 00:12:43,080
Eh!
250
00:12:46,840 --> 00:12:47,840
Thanks.
251
00:12:58,160 --> 00:12:59,160
Eh...
252
00:12:59,240 --> 00:13:00,920
Eh...
253
00:13:01,560 --> 00:13:03,280
Which one do you like the most?
254
00:13:03,920 --> 00:13:05,600
Are we talking about shirts?
255
00:13:13,480 --> 00:13:15,480
So you were
Mister Spain in 2012.
256
00:13:15,680 --> 00:13:16,840
What are you doing on Tinder?
257
00:13:16,920 --> 00:13:18,800
Guys like you
aren't single.
258
00:13:19,120 --> 00:13:21,960
Or girls like me.
Perhaps it's a sign.
259
00:13:23,520 --> 00:13:27,040
Hey! Some coincidence that we're
both restaurant critics!
260
00:13:27,320 --> 00:13:29,480
The truth is it's great to be
able to have dinner with someone
261
00:13:29,560 --> 00:13:32,200
who knows the difference between
a Ribera and a Burgundy.
262
00:13:32,280 --> 00:13:33,680
I'm not single.
263
00:13:34,480 --> 00:13:35,520
I'm seeing a lot of women.
264
00:13:37,240 --> 00:13:38,800
Let's order "carpaccio."
265
00:13:38,880 --> 00:13:42,040
Hey, do you know
what "carpaccio" means?
266
00:13:43,440 --> 00:13:46,200
It's that stuff that's...
like it was raw or something?
267
00:13:48,080 --> 00:13:49,760
You're kidding, right?
268
00:13:49,840 --> 00:13:53,320
So you're seeing ten different
women? What do you mean ten?
269
00:13:53,680 --> 00:13:54,880
Polyamory.
270
00:13:55,080 --> 00:13:57,480
I'm polyamorous.
Have you never tried it?
271
00:13:57,800 --> 00:14:01,160
No. I have enough problems finding
one, let alone nine others.
272
00:14:01,520 --> 00:14:04,720
Well, you should try it. There are
a lot of fish in the sea, babe.
273
00:14:05,440 --> 00:14:06,440
Did you say "babe"?
274
00:14:13,440 --> 00:14:15,520
So, If I
want to be with you,
275
00:14:15,600 --> 00:14:17,120
I have to be "polyamorish"?
276
00:14:19,520 --> 00:14:21,480
It's "polyamorous", babe.
277
00:14:23,040 --> 00:14:24,720
Shall I tag you on Insta?
278
00:14:24,800 --> 00:14:26,760
We can post something
after dinner.
279
00:14:27,200 --> 00:14:29,040
-How many followers do you have?
-Eh...
280
00:14:29,120 --> 00:14:31,240
You know?
I'm a serious critic.
281
00:14:31,320 --> 00:14:34,640
Not one of the foodies who
taking cool photos in cool places
282
00:14:34,720 --> 00:14:36,040
to put on Insta,
283
00:14:36,120 --> 00:14:37,760
with loads of hashtags like...
284
00:14:38,040 --> 00:14:39,320
YumYum.
285
00:14:39,400 --> 00:14:41,200
Healthyfood.
286
00:14:41,280 --> 00:14:42,760
Iateitup.
287
00:14:42,840 --> 00:14:44,200
Foodielovers.
288
00:14:44,560 --> 00:14:46,400
Foodiegirl.
289
00:14:46,480 --> 00:14:48,560
Delicious.
290
00:14:49,040 --> 00:14:51,360
Let's see, look,
you and me will do the following.
291
00:14:51,440 --> 00:14:54,880
We'll meet up...
We'll meet up on Tuesdays.
292
00:14:55,880 --> 00:14:58,400
Because I'm free on Tuesdays
so...
293
00:14:59,000 --> 00:15:00,120
Marta, babe.
294
00:15:00,280 --> 00:15:02,000
If you're not on Insta,
295
00:15:02,080 --> 00:15:03,440
you're a dinosaur.
296
00:15:03,520 --> 00:15:05,840
I just posted it
and I've already got 1000 likes.
297
00:15:06,240 --> 00:15:08,520
Don't you get it? You can't be
a restaurant critic
298
00:15:08,600 --> 00:15:12,000
if you can't tell a chardonnay
from a sauvignon blanc?
299
00:15:12,080 --> 00:15:14,840
See? You laugh at my hashtags
in English
300
00:15:14,920 --> 00:15:18,440
and now you're showing off with
the three French words you know.
301
00:15:18,680 --> 00:15:21,160
-Another glass?
-No, I'm going home.
302
00:15:21,240 --> 00:15:22,320
What's wrong?
303
00:15:22,400 --> 00:15:23,920
I don't know, call me old fashioned,
304
00:15:24,000 --> 00:15:25,720
but I don't want to be
with a guy
305
00:15:25,800 --> 00:15:27,600
who is going to throw me out quick
306
00:15:27,680 --> 00:15:29,680
because others are
clamouring in the queue.
307
00:15:29,760 --> 00:15:31,120
No, no. It's not like that!
308
00:15:31,200 --> 00:15:32,920
Okay, it's true
there's a ranking,
309
00:15:33,000 --> 00:15:35,880
But you'd come in...,
you'd rank,
310
00:15:35,960 --> 00:15:38,160
you'd be around
six or seven.
311
00:15:38,680 --> 00:15:39,800
Six or seven?
312
00:15:40,080 --> 00:15:42,920
Sorry? Six or seven out of ten?
What are you playing at?
313
00:15:43,000 --> 00:15:46,640
Serious critics are already a
little bit... reallypissedoff.
314
00:15:46,720 --> 00:15:48,840
That comment was a bit random.
315
00:15:49,040 --> 00:15:50,840
It makes you look a little bit old.
316
00:15:51,360 --> 00:15:52,360
Yeah. Eh...
317
00:15:52,520 --> 00:15:53,640
dontgiveafuck.
318
00:15:53,720 --> 00:15:56,800
If you lost a bit of weight,
you could be number five.
319
00:15:57,120 --> 00:15:58,360
Up yours.
320
00:15:58,440 --> 00:16:01,560
That's a bit random,
but if we do it the other way round,
321
00:16:01,640 --> 00:16:03,800
you'd be in at number two.
322
00:16:04,040 --> 00:16:06,440
-The other way, I...
-Got it, thanks.
323
00:16:08,520 --> 00:16:10,280
Okay, see you on Tuesday,
babe.
324
00:16:12,040 --> 00:16:13,360
Oh, this is going to hurt.
325
00:16:13,880 --> 00:16:16,560
A frozen food factory
is giving me 10,000 euros
326
00:16:16,640 --> 00:16:18,720
to promote their
crabsticks.
327
00:16:20,280 --> 00:16:21,320
Unfollow.
328
00:16:22,920 --> 00:16:24,360
Laters.
329
00:16:31,440 --> 00:16:32,960
Forget it, Marieta.
330
00:16:33,280 --> 00:16:35,720
If you have a good
lentil and chorizo stew
331
00:16:35,800 --> 00:16:38,000
you'll get rid of the taste of
guacamole.
332
00:16:38,080 --> 00:16:40,600
"Did you call me at 7:00
to tell me that?"
333
00:16:41,720 --> 00:16:43,760
Eh... No, look, no.
334
00:16:43,840 --> 00:16:45,360
Eh... I called... well...
335
00:16:45,440 --> 00:16:47,680
to speak to my granddaughter.
336
00:16:48,160 --> 00:16:49,160
How is she?
337
00:16:49,240 --> 00:16:52,560
"Asleep, like the other eight
times you've called at this time."
338
00:16:52,640 --> 00:16:55,600
It's not my fault if
you're six hours behind.
339
00:16:55,800 --> 00:16:57,160
"Don't mess me around, Joaquín."
340
00:16:57,240 --> 00:16:59,240
"If you want to see your
granddaughter so much,
341
00:16:59,320 --> 00:17:00,720
get on a plane and come and visit us."
342
00:17:01,240 --> 00:17:02,600
You want me to come and see you?
343
00:17:02,680 --> 00:17:05,080
"Me no, your granddaugher and your son."
344
00:17:05,480 --> 00:17:07,520
"Oh, and bring Amparo
if you want."
345
00:17:07,600 --> 00:17:08,600
Which Amparo?
346
00:17:08,680 --> 00:17:10,560
"That's your girlfriend isn't it?"
347
00:17:10,840 --> 00:17:12,720
Oh, Amparito!
348
00:17:12,800 --> 00:17:15,760
Amparito! I call her Amparito
or dearest.
349
00:17:15,840 --> 00:17:18,720
But, of course, when you say
"Amparo", it's like I...
350
00:17:19,520 --> 00:17:21,240
"I'm going to have breakfast,
Joaquín."
351
00:17:21,440 --> 00:17:23,520
"See you then."
352
00:17:23,680 --> 00:17:24,680
Hey...
353
00:17:27,080 --> 00:17:28,200
No way!
354
00:17:28,280 --> 00:17:31,240
Yes, of course, I'm going to
go to Mexico right now!
355
00:17:31,520 --> 00:17:33,400
As if I have nothing to do
around here.
356
00:17:33,480 --> 00:17:35,240
With the problems I have
with...!
357
00:17:41,720 --> 00:17:44,400
You walked out on
Mister Spain 2012?
358
00:17:44,480 --> 00:17:46,560
-Are you nuts?
-He was "Pollyannarous."
359
00:17:47,120 --> 00:17:48,680
"Pollyannarous"? Gay?
360
00:17:49,640 --> 00:17:51,000
He's got a ranking
361
00:17:51,080 --> 00:17:53,520
and said I would be
a six or seven at best,
362
00:17:53,600 --> 00:17:55,200
a five if I lose five kilos.
363
00:17:55,280 --> 00:17:57,800
Five kilos? No.
Maybe three.
364
00:17:59,960 --> 00:18:02,000
I did the stupid uncoupling
ritual.
365
00:18:02,080 --> 00:18:05,320
Why can't I find a
normal guy?
366
00:18:05,400 --> 00:18:07,720
They died out
with the last ice-age.
367
00:18:07,800 --> 00:18:10,600
I don't know if they died out,
but they ain't on Tinder.
368
00:18:10,680 --> 00:18:13,520
You should make a false profile.
It's better that way.
369
00:18:13,880 --> 00:18:16,080
I did.
Do you know what happened?
370
00:18:16,600 --> 00:18:18,080
So you are Rodolfo.
371
00:18:18,800 --> 00:18:20,480
Leonor. Nice to meet you.
372
00:18:22,520 --> 00:18:24,520
Can you tell me what
the hell you are doing here?
373
00:18:25,000 --> 00:18:26,080
Playing the fool.
374
00:18:28,720 --> 00:18:32,000
Okay, hon, forget the social
networks. Get your agenda.
375
00:18:32,080 --> 00:18:33,640
I've been through it
376
00:18:33,720 --> 00:18:35,400
and there's nothing
to get excited about.
377
00:18:35,480 --> 00:18:36,760
Have you called any exes?
378
00:18:36,840 --> 00:18:39,240
All of them, and those that are
single aren't interested.
379
00:18:39,480 --> 00:18:40,880
All the married ones, very
interested.
380
00:18:40,960 --> 00:18:42,960
Did you call Abracitos?
381
00:18:43,440 --> 00:18:45,760
Yes, he told to speak to
his representative.
382
00:18:45,960 --> 00:18:47,960
-He's an actor now?
-No!
383
00:18:48,040 --> 00:18:51,280
But chefs are all acting like
stars these days.
384
00:18:51,640 --> 00:18:54,200
Well, hon, we did
the uncoupling ritual,
385
00:18:54,280 --> 00:18:57,000
but if you're incapable of
docking in another port...
386
00:18:57,920 --> 00:19:00,240
Maybe I don't have to dock
in any port
387
00:19:00,320 --> 00:19:02,000
I have to let go of the ropes
388
00:19:02,080 --> 00:19:04,200
and sail off into the distance,
without a helmsman.
389
00:19:04,400 --> 00:19:06,040
I'm going to kill Jodorowsky.
390
00:19:06,120 --> 00:19:08,560
All of this began with the idea
of having a kid, didn't it?
391
00:19:08,960 --> 00:19:10,840
Who says I can't have one
on my own?
392
00:19:11,080 --> 00:19:12,560
Eh... Biology?
393
00:19:13,040 --> 00:19:14,880
For that,
I don't need a man.
394
00:19:16,040 --> 00:19:17,200
And what are you doing now?
395
00:19:17,440 --> 00:19:18,560
Looking for a date.
396
00:19:18,640 --> 00:19:19,960
-On Tinder?
-No.
397
00:19:20,040 --> 00:19:21,560
A fertility clinic.
398
00:19:27,960 --> 00:19:29,000
Boss.
399
00:19:29,760 --> 00:19:32,000
I took up all of the weeds
from the lawn.
400
00:19:32,080 --> 00:19:34,000
Here we only have beautiful flowers.
401
00:19:35,400 --> 00:19:36,600
It smells great.
402
00:19:37,560 --> 00:19:40,360
Turbot in green sauce with
clams, my speciality.
403
00:19:41,280 --> 00:19:42,400
Well, one of them.
404
00:19:42,760 --> 00:19:43,880
How amazing!
405
00:19:43,960 --> 00:19:45,320
You're a cook too.
406
00:19:45,600 --> 00:19:48,480
It's just a hobby.
Let's say it helps me relax.
407
00:19:48,720 --> 00:19:50,600
What happened? Are you stressed?
408
00:19:50,680 --> 00:19:53,920
No surprise, with a different date
every day, you must be worn out.
409
00:19:54,400 --> 00:19:56,920
-Sorry?
-No, sorry, please forgive me.
410
00:19:57,520 --> 00:20:00,760
It's funny seeing you dressed to
kill each time.
411
00:20:01,160 --> 00:20:02,360
I'm not judging you, hey?
412
00:20:02,440 --> 00:20:04,880
You're a Casanova, I love it.
I never met one.
413
00:20:05,280 --> 00:20:08,680
Well. You see me go out, but you
don't when I come home late alone.
414
00:20:10,280 --> 00:20:13,320
And playing this tender soul
who comes home alone
415
00:20:13,400 --> 00:20:14,720
is another trick to get sympathy?
416
00:20:14,960 --> 00:20:17,920
No. I'm out of tricks and
I've been through the black book too.
417
00:20:18,440 --> 00:20:20,840
So, for a while,
I'm going to be out of the game.
418
00:20:21,560 --> 00:20:22,800
You don't have to worry.
419
00:20:24,200 --> 00:20:25,400
I wasn't worried.
420
00:20:25,680 --> 00:20:28,000
I can see.
You're a lamb in wolf's clothing.
421
00:20:34,600 --> 00:20:36,120
Don't you want to go to the doctor?
422
00:20:36,200 --> 00:20:40,040
No. I just want to see my record so
I can take it to a different centre.
423
00:20:40,120 --> 00:20:42,080
Has there been any problem
with us?
424
00:20:42,200 --> 00:20:44,600
Well, actually, now you
ask, yes, in truth.
425
00:20:44,680 --> 00:20:46,120
Hello. Eh...
426
00:20:50,040 --> 00:20:52,840
Have you come for an appointment,
uh... Marta?
427
00:20:53,280 --> 00:20:56,080
No. She's come for her clinical
records. She wants to change centre.
428
00:20:56,160 --> 00:20:57,840
Was there a problem here?
429
00:20:57,920 --> 00:20:59,120
I asked her the same question.
430
00:20:59,360 --> 00:21:00,600
What did she say?
431
00:21:00,680 --> 00:21:01,920
Will you give me the records?
432
00:21:02,000 --> 00:21:04,160
Lady, there's no need to be
unpleasant.
433
00:21:04,560 --> 00:21:06,560
Shall I tell something that
really is unpleasant?
434
00:21:06,880 --> 00:21:08,240
Tell me whatever you want.
435
00:21:08,320 --> 00:21:10,080
Blondie, calm yourself.
436
00:21:10,360 --> 00:21:11,840
Don't call me "blondie."
437
00:21:12,560 --> 00:21:13,920
I was talking to her.
438
00:21:15,680 --> 00:21:16,680
Ah.
439
00:21:17,360 --> 00:21:20,440
Anyway you shouldn't speak to
an employee that way.
440
00:21:20,680 --> 00:21:21,880
I'm his wife.
441
00:21:27,760 --> 00:21:28,760
Well...
442
00:21:29,560 --> 00:21:32,160
no, no I haven't had any kind of
problem.
443
00:21:32,240 --> 00:21:33,960
I moved to another city.
444
00:21:41,800 --> 00:21:43,320
I'd offer you a glass of wine,
445
00:21:43,840 --> 00:21:45,600
but if your brother finds out,
he'll kill me.
446
00:21:45,680 --> 00:21:48,360
And it's a pity because it's
a Rioja made from 100% grenache
447
00:21:48,440 --> 00:21:50,360
which pisses on
any Burgundy.
448
00:21:51,640 --> 00:21:54,560
My brother says that if you want
to seduce a girl,
449
00:21:54,640 --> 00:21:55,800
you offer her a glass of wine.
450
00:21:58,040 --> 00:21:59,480
And that's bad because...?
451
00:21:59,560 --> 00:22:01,440
Because you're an asshole
to women.
452
00:22:01,640 --> 00:22:03,040
All that, according to my brother.
453
00:22:04,640 --> 00:22:05,640
Yeah.
454
00:22:05,720 --> 00:22:07,280
Well, pay attention to your brother.
455
00:22:11,480 --> 00:22:13,720
And if I've been working hard
and am a bit thirsty?
456
00:22:14,320 --> 00:22:16,720
-There's water in the fridge.
-Water is for plants.
457
00:22:16,800 --> 00:22:18,960
You are at home.
Take whatever you want.
458
00:22:19,320 --> 00:22:20,680
No, no, pará!
459
00:22:20,760 --> 00:22:22,720
No, Javi, no, eso no, no, no!
460
00:22:23,800 --> 00:22:26,120
-What's up?
-You just said it.
461
00:22:26,560 --> 00:22:28,200
"Take whatever you want."
462
00:22:28,280 --> 00:22:30,040
Do you know what that means in
Argentina?
463
00:22:30,920 --> 00:22:31,920
Ah.
464
00:22:32,280 --> 00:22:33,480
Okay, okay, sorry.
465
00:22:33,920 --> 00:22:34,920
Eh...
466
00:22:38,240 --> 00:22:39,400
Eh... Oh! Eh...
467
00:22:39,480 --> 00:22:42,840
Claudia, you've caught me
at a really bad time, but...
468
00:22:44,680 --> 00:22:47,600
But, well, there's plenty of
turbot.
469
00:22:48,160 --> 00:22:51,000
Just in case, you're thirsty,
as well as hungry.
470
00:22:52,480 --> 00:22:55,240
My brother said to be careful
if you offered me wine,
471
00:22:55,840 --> 00:22:58,080
but he didn't mention turbot.
472
00:23:01,240 --> 00:23:03,040
Here are you records...
473
00:23:04,800 --> 00:23:06,000
and Javier's too.
474
00:23:09,400 --> 00:23:10,640
I wish you both luck.
475
00:23:11,840 --> 00:23:14,560
I only want mine, please.
I'm going to have a child on my own.
476
00:23:14,840 --> 00:23:15,880
Really?
477
00:23:16,480 --> 00:23:18,520
We split up and
you know why.
478
00:23:18,840 --> 00:23:20,160
You left him because of me?
479
00:23:20,240 --> 00:23:22,000
That's one way of putting it.
480
00:23:22,680 --> 00:23:24,520
Why have you come to see me,
Marta?
481
00:23:24,600 --> 00:23:26,240
No, don't get the wrong idea again.
482
00:23:26,320 --> 00:23:28,160
I just came for my records.
That's it.
483
00:23:28,240 --> 00:23:30,840
So why didn't you
tell my wife about it?
484
00:23:30,920 --> 00:23:32,760
I should have told the police.
485
00:23:32,840 --> 00:23:34,680
Why don't you give me
a chance?
486
00:23:36,080 --> 00:23:37,920
Can't you see the mess you
have got me into?
487
00:23:38,000 --> 00:23:40,480
It's not about giving you
an opportunity or not.
488
00:23:40,560 --> 00:23:42,640
I can't think about giving an
an opportunity to anyone
489
00:23:42,720 --> 00:23:44,000
I can't move on.
490
00:23:44,080 --> 00:23:47,160
After you have met your soulmate
it's difficult to.
491
00:23:47,240 --> 00:23:49,280
If I was your psychologist,
I'd say:
492
00:23:49,360 --> 00:23:51,720
"You can't move on
without wetting your finger."
493
00:23:55,240 --> 00:23:56,480
And what does that mean?
494
00:23:56,560 --> 00:23:59,160
You can't forget who you don't
want to forget.
495
00:24:06,200 --> 00:24:07,600
Do you understand me?
496
00:24:08,080 --> 00:24:09,640
Uh... Yes.
497
00:24:11,160 --> 00:24:13,240
-I'm getting back together with Javi.
-What?
498
00:24:13,520 --> 00:24:16,120
No, no, no, not with Javi.
I was speaking about me.
499
00:24:19,880 --> 00:24:22,920
Blondie, your husband is nuts about
me but he'll get over it.
500
00:24:23,000 --> 00:24:24,760
And he's going to come out now
and give you a kiss.
501
00:24:24,960 --> 00:24:28,200
Tonight, he'll take you
to a nice place for dinner.
502
00:24:28,840 --> 00:24:30,160
What have you gone and done?
503
00:24:31,280 --> 00:24:34,320
It's a calculator but if you don't
stop, I'll really tell her.
504
00:24:34,680 --> 00:24:37,440
It's not a calculator!
I just put in an intercom!
505
00:24:38,720 --> 00:24:39,720
Eh...
506
00:24:41,280 --> 00:24:43,520
I have to go. Good luck.
507
00:24:46,800 --> 00:24:47,880
Coming! Coming!
508
00:24:53,240 --> 00:24:54,440
What are you doing?
509
00:24:54,680 --> 00:24:55,960
I want to speak to you.
510
00:24:56,480 --> 00:24:59,080
Eh... it's not a good
time, Marta.
511
00:24:59,560 --> 00:25:01,480
Ah, yeah, yeah, of course,
there's someone there.
512
00:25:01,560 --> 00:25:04,440
Well, if you want, we'll go
straight to the bedroom to say hi.
513
00:25:04,520 --> 00:25:06,160
We'll end up there anyway...
514
00:25:06,240 --> 00:25:07,640
Wait, really.
515
00:25:07,720 --> 00:25:09,960
This time it's true.
It's better if you leave.
516
00:25:10,560 --> 00:25:11,760
I'm not leaving.
517
00:25:12,040 --> 00:25:14,240
I can't turn the page
without wetting my finger.
518
00:25:14,440 --> 00:25:15,440
What?
519
00:25:16,720 --> 00:25:17,720
What are you doing?
520
00:25:17,800 --> 00:25:19,640
No, Marta, wait! Stop, stop!
521
00:25:20,040 --> 00:25:21,560
Marta, don't go in there!
No, no!
522
00:25:26,560 --> 00:25:27,640
Who are you?
523
00:25:29,080 --> 00:25:30,320
I'm Claudia.
524
00:25:31,360 --> 00:25:32,640
She's the gardener.
525
00:25:35,840 --> 00:25:37,080
And who are you?
526
00:25:40,960 --> 00:25:42,200
Ask him.
38321
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