All language subtitles for Little.Coincidences.S02E07_English

-Are you going back to sleep?
-Oh!

Don't you know you should
never wake a sleepwalker?

It's really dangerous.

Yeah, a sleepwalker who drinks
tequila.

Really Dad? It's 8 o'clock.
Tequila for breakfast?

No, clever clogs. It's not tequila
for breakfast because I had no dinner.

Technically speaking,
I'd be having dinner.

If you're ruining my life,
what'll it be like once you're born?

Aren't you going in to speak to mum?

No. And we don't know yet
if she is mum.

And if I did go in, I wouldn't know
what to say to your...

to Marta.

Tell her you love her.

She cheated on me.
You remember?

It's not about what I remember,
it's about whether you can forget.

And don't shout.
Act like and adult.

Take it easy, I'll sort it out

in a calm and collected way.

You just smashed a fruit bowl.

Okay, but I had the maturity
and the sense

to take the fruit out first.
You shouldn't play with your food.

-I'm glad you came...
-Get out of my house.

-Our house you mean.
-I saw it first.

"I saw it first."
Are you four years old?

Anyway, we both saw it at the same
time.

Javi, c'mon, all this is crazy
over just one kiss.

Don't you think it's childish?

And what is being grown-up exactly?

Having a fight with your partner
then going out on the pull?

-I'm the grown up here.
-Javi...

Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah,
blahba, blahba.

Javi, I love you.
Do you love me?

I love you. And you show up
in a video snogging a doctor.

-I understand how you feel, but...
-Get out of our house.

Okay, fine.

If that's what you want, fine,

but I want you to know...
that I'm taking the TV.

We bought that TV together.

But if we're going to separate,
we have to divide up all our stuff

and I'm asking for the TV.

Okay, well I'm taking the
king-size bed.

I think I'm going to make the
best use of it.

-Enjoy.
-Fine.

-I'm asking for Paris.
-You can't ask for Paris.

Anyway, we were going
to go in March.

Well, you're not going now.
I'm going by my self.

And with whoever I invite.

Okay, well I get Santander.

What do you mean Santander?
That's where I'm from

and my granny lives there, my
aunts, uncles, cousins.

All for me.

They going to get upset that you
swapped them for a TV.

Okay, fine,
I get the centre of Madrid.

You can't ask for Madrid.

That's where the restaurants are
and that's my job.

There are plenty of restuarants
in Santander.

Okay, very well, well... well...

Well I...? Me... I...

Can we stop all this nonsense?
This is insane.

-Tell me, what shall we do.
-I don't know, Marta.

I really don't know.

I know I don't want you to go
and that I don't want to see you.

All mixed up, at the same time.
I don't know.

You want our life to be
like a romantic film.

You know what would happen in a
film after this fight?

They would kiss?

You haven't seen a lot of films,
have you?

There we are.

That's your space
and this part is mine.

And I can do what I want with
whoever I want in here.

I know you're losing it, but,
if I lose it, you'll see.

You haven't seen me when
I'm losing it.

Think of it as the swimming
pool.

The adults over here
and the spoilt kids over there

playing doctors and nurses.

You're not being fair.

No, sure, I'm not being fair because

I get the broom
cupboard and that

would be perfect for you if you want
to hide a therapist or something.

Okay.

You've won.
I've lost it. Gimme.

This corridor...

for me.

Let's see how you manage to get
outside.

Great.

Okay, in this corridor,
I'm going to draw...

a borderline, okay?

Let's see how you are able to
to get to... the kitchen.

Oh dear!
I wont be able to cook!

Or to eat either.

Well, I'll just have to
have it delivered.

That way I'll get to meet people.

But they can't go to the bedroom
because it's mine.

I'll use the guest room.
The closet is mine.

Well, the bathroom's mine.

We have to share it.
I'm not going to piss in the garden.

Why not? And the other, in the
greenhouse, it's natural fertilizer.

And if I have the girls round for
dinner and they need the bathroom?

And if I get the boys round to
play poker and we need to smoke?

But you don't even smoke.

And you never cook dinner
for friends.

And you don't play poker.

And, anyhow
gambling doesn't suit you.

Nor does being cheated on.

Great, dad. So grown up.

A game? Cool brother!
Count me in.

Shall I bring some snacks?

We're going to play poker?

Oh! So they play
while we have dinner?

What do I care if Elisa
is there? What does it matter?

For me Elisa... I don't care
if she's there or not.

And so what if
Nacho's there?

Nacho to me...
I can take him or leave him.

Nacho? So what?

I was about to ask:
"Which Elisa?."

You said she'd be there with Marta

so I supposed it was Elisa
the pilot, right?

If you said it was,
I dunno, Pau Gasol,

I'd be a bit nervous,

but Nacho, Nacho... Are you serious?

Whose bringing who?

-Who?
-I can't hear you.

-Marta, I'm hanging up.
-Bye bye, the line's gone.

Who was it?

Oh, my brother Javi,

he wants to go to see
the new Bruce Willis.

Do you fancy the cinema?

The new Bruce Willis is supposed
to be great.

You go.
I can't stand his voice.

Smoking's great.

Javi, what the hell are we
smoking for?

Because we're guys...

and us guys have to get back
to the essence of masculinity.

Nobody is going to tell us

what we can
and cannot do.

So true.

But we're smoking because
you told us to.

If I have to choose between
essential masculinity

and lung cancer I'd have to think
about it.

Can you stop acting like idiots?
It's disgusting smoking in here.

Did someone say something?

I heard Marta say that
it's...

Rafa, can you tell that girl

that we are in my area
and we can smoke in here?

Marta, Javi says it's his area
and it's okay to smoke here.

Well, tell you friend that the smoke
has gone over to my area.

And tell him he's a dick.

Marta says that the smoke has
gone over to her area and...

I didn't get the last bit.

Okay, tell... tell...

the blonde one

to go to the greenhouse,
where the air is pure.

And, as she looks after the plants,
she should be...

Javi says,
you should all go to the greenhouse.

That's what Javi says, hey?
I couldn't care less.

Look, I'll tell you straight.

As I'm a spoilt girl
who can't do anything for herself,

I'm looking for a gardener.

Anyone hear anything?

Excuse me, my sister Claudia
is a great gardener

and she's looking for work.
Why don't you call her?

Don't speak to her.

-To my sister?
-No, to Mar...

I mean, to her.

Don't point at me. David.

Yes. Eh...

If Javi won't let you talk
to Marta,

tell me about your sister
and I'll pass it on,

because he let's me
talk to her.

Ok, well my sister is a
wonderful gardener

and she needs a job.

-Marta, if you need a gardener...
-Don't speak to them.

-And if you do? What?
-C'mon, let's go.

The pizza will go cold and
you'll heat up.

-Whose turn is it?
-Mine.

There you go. Snap.

What are you on about? It's poker.

Sorry, I don't know
where my head's at.

I can't stop thinking about
my poor unemployed sister

and I'm telling you
it's breaking my heart.

Rafa, I'm going to give you
my sister's number

in case you need a
gardener.

Hey? C'mon, write it down.

Claudia,

666 12 69 69 3.

Do you mind if we give it to...?

Claudia.

Yes, your brother David gave
me your number.

It's Marta. Uh huh. Yes.

What do you want me to do?
She's my sister.

I don't get it. Marta needs a
gardener not a garden gnome.

No, no, no, no, no!

You can laugh about anything but
watch what you say about my sister

because I swear I'll knock
your block off.

Hey! Where do you think you're
going?

Uh... to get a beer?

The kitchen's in my zone.
You can't go through.

Nacho, get me a beer, c'mon.

Hey...? What are you doing?

I'm being polite, Javi,
being polite.

She's thirsty and like a gentleman,
I'm giving her a beer.

Your shit is yours alone.

But me and the guys, we're human
beings not macho men.

-Is that right?
-Wimp.

-Sucker.
-A bit wimpy for sure.

Hang on, no ones pulling my strings.

I was going to take the beer
over

and drink it right in front
of her.

Nacho, you were going to bring me a
beer.

The only one pulling your strings
is your brother.

-Oh yeah?
-Yeah.

You can have it if you want,
but it's empty.

Anyway why don't you get your
boyfriend to get you one,

that boyfriend you claim to have.

Actually I do have a boyfriend
and he's a real man.

Not someone who lets himself be
pushed around by his brother

or any fit woman
who makes eyes at him.

Firstly,

okay, yes, you're fit.

And, secondly,

I'd like to have a look at this
boyfriend of yours.

No, Nacho, c'mon, you don't
really want to see him.

It's true, you wouldn't because
he's much better than you.

So I'd love to meet him.

No, no, no, no, it really isn't
a good idea! What for?

He's just like the rest.
Seen one, you've seen them all.

We can meet up whenever you want.

Me, with my boyfriend
and you, with your piggy-wiggy.

Hey, Elisa, you can argue but
with a bit of respect.

But that's what he calls her.

You call your wife "piggy wiggy"?

I don't speak with you
lot over there.

Well, I do.
Do you want me to tell her?

Okay. Tell her

we'll meet up tomorrow
for dinner,

in that restaurant
we always go to.

-Nacho says...
-Rafa, button it.

Nacho, really, the dinner
isn't a vey good idea.

Okay, we'll meet at ten.

Eh...

Great, at least
we've got a gardener.

Did I miss something?

Mum!

Are you stealing dad's stuff?

Stealing to eat is not a sin.

Great telling your son that.

But what do you need
six litres of milk for?

I have to have breakfast, don't I?

Six litres of milk?

What are you? A calf?

Okay, I'm doing it to piss off

I mean, to annoy Javier.

You're going to prove dad right.
you're a spoilt girl.

-La la la, I can't hear you.
-What are you doing?

That's my milk.

The milk isn't yours.
It's the cow's.

Why are you in my area?

Your milk, your area...

Does everything belong to you?

Yes, from this line to there,
it isn't mine.

From here to here, it is.

Happy now?

Give me back my milk, c'mon.

Don't tread on my area.

You don't even drink milk.
You just want to piss me off.

I do,
but as you know nothing about me...

Only your things are important.

"My house", "my milk"...

-I don't speak that way.
-I know.

My impressions are rubbish.
You should know that.

You don't know me, do you?

I'm sorry, I know more about you
than you do about me.

-Ha!
-Ha?

What's this "ha"?

This is new, you never say "ha". See
how many things I know about you?

You don't know me more
than I know you.

If you knew something about me,
you'd know I know all about you.

What a chance! You know about me and
I don't want to know you anymore.

This is crazy. Can we stop now?

Yes, it's crazy.
It makes no sense to argue who

knows less than the other
when we can bet on who knows more.

And what do we bet? The milk?

No, the house.

Okay, I can't take it any more.

When I get back from work,
we'll bet on the house.

Here you go, so you can have
your last breakfast here.

-What are you doing here?
-Having breakfast. Coffee?

No. Why are you still in my house?

Last night I was shattered
after...

-You know what.
-And you stayed over?

Aha, after...

Stop winking at me!

Why the hell
did you stay over?

I fell asleep and you didn't wake
me, in order to throw me out.

No, excuse me, I don't throw you
out, you leave.

You set the alarm for 2pm,

turn on all the lights and whisper
to me that it's time to leave.

I don't do that.
I don't whisper anything.

True, it's more like shouting.

Well, okay, but

this behaviour
has an explanation.

I know. You don't want me to stay so
it doesn't feel like a relationship.

No, really, that's not it, that's
not it.

Seriously, Elisa,
it doesn't matter.

No, really, that's not it.

It's more to...

We know what there is between us.

I know what I want and I like it.
Close your eyes.

Hey...Are you going to kiss me?

Because I swear, nobody has ever

-kissed me in the morning.
-No, no. Close your eyes.

When you open them, I'll be gone.
If you want me to come back, call me.

Okay.

You think I'm crazy,
insecure and paranoid, right?

I love it that you're crazy
insecure and paranoid.

I'm not crazy!

-I'm not crazy.
-You're not crazy.

And I don't care about what
you're hiding from me.

I'm not hiding anything.

In fact, tonight,

I was thinking about dinner
with a friends. A foursome.

Wow!

And why didn't you tell me before?

-I wanted to give you a surprise.
-Really?

-Yes.
-And what kind of...?

Surprise!

Where's the surprise in going out
with one of your friends?

Well, her boyfriend as well.
We never go out as a foursome.

We never go out,
as a foursome or a twosome.

That's why, piggy-wiggy.
You used to be up for it.

And the weekend starts on Thursday!

Nacho, are you alright?

Fine, I really feel like
going out as a foursome

and later, we can come back home
and slag them off.

Why do I need to slag them off?

Well... People are awful, aren't
they? Make yourself pretty.

-Shall I take you to the hairdresser?
-Excuse me?

Why do I have to get dolled up?

-Rivalry.
-What? What rivalry?

When two couples go out together.

To see who is hot
and who is not.

Don't you see we have to go out
more?

We're not with it, piggy.

We're not.

You didn't expect all this
for the competition, did you?

See how little you know me?

Thanks, Jose.

Have you been here before?

Me? Me? Never.

I said Jose at random.
It's not so hard to get it right.

Almost all of us Spaniards
are called Jose.

Your name's Nacho.

Exactly. Jose, Nacho, Nacho, Jose.

We're very predictable
as names go.

And how do you know this girl?

Um...

I don't really.
I know her a bit. By sight.

Far away.
Like a distant cousin.

So, she's your cousin?

No, no, no. If she was my cousin,
you'd know her and you don't, right?

You'd have heard of
cousin Elisa

and no one ever told you
about an Elisa, did they?

Nacho.

Elisa, what a coincidence!

Coincidence?
We arranged to meet, didn't we?

Yes, yes...

Yes, of course.

I meant that it's a coincidence
you're dressed almost the same.

Eh... Don't mind him.

He's acting very strange today.

I'm Míriam. Lovely to meet you.

Elisa. Nice to meet you too.

Míriam is my wife
and, well, here she is.

Did your boyfriend pull out?
Don't tell me he's not coming?

He's parking.

You sure? There was loads of space.

Yeah, but you look like you have a
little car,

but he's got a huge one,
enormous, know what I mean?

And he can't park it just anywhere.

Do you like big ones?

I like a normal runabout.

Yeah, that's because
you're used to one, of course.

But, when you try
one of these

you won't settle for less.

I know you're speaking about cars,

otherwise I'd think
you were speaking about...

Jose, is the table ready?

Okay, we're going to start
with an easy one.

When is my birthday?

-26th of June.
-Oh! Close.

-26th of July.
-Good try.

No, wait, wait.
It's February 11th.

That's yours, stupid.

It sounded familiar.

Okay, okay.

Admit that you were trying to
get me there.

Right, stop. It's...

It's my turn. Uh...

Let's see. What three spices
do I put on a salmon...

marinade?

How should I know such dumb
question? And I don't like salmon.

And I should know when your birthday
is?

Is this the XIX century?
Facebook lets us know those things.

Javi, you have to ask personal
questions, not this shit.

Don't call my salmon marinade
"shit."

Love.

Maybe he's afraid of commitment
and he's run away.

Why do you say that?

Dunno. Maybe,
she's nuts about him

but he's not about her.

Or, maybe, he's one of those guys
or girls who is realtionship-phobic

and runs into someone
who looks a bit soft,

falls in love a wee bit,
then gets scared and runs off.

Do you know her boyfriend?

No, but I can picture him
perfectly.

Well, you can stop picturing,
because he's just arrived.

Knowing so much about me,

that's ten questions each
and it's still 0-0.

Okay, but I ask you what my
favourite book is,

my favourite colour or my
second surname

or where we first kissed

or the first film
we saw.

While you, for example,
have just asked me

what was the best year
for wines from the Rioja.

Uh huh. And it was 2001.

If you don't know that,
you've never known anything.

You're playing tricks
and you know it.

It's about who cares more about
what matters to the other.

Do you want a personal question
that you really should know?

Yes. If I get it right, the house is
mine. If I'm wrong it's yours.

Are you sure?

Totally, but it has to be something
really intimate and personal.

Very well. What's my father's name
and why don't I speak to him?

Isn't that your...?

My old school chum! Nachete!

What a coincidence!
It's been a long time!

Go along with it. Don't fuck me
over.

Who'd have thought it?

Wow! What a surprise, hey?

Eh... School chum?

Yes, well, not from the same
year. Were we?

I repeated a couple of years.
I was a dreadful student.

So Nachete is your famous friend.
When did you meet?

Well. Friends-friends, not really.

We're more like acquaintances.

We're something like
distant cousins.

If you'll excuse me,
I'm off to the loo.

Can you tell me what's going on?

Christ!
Thanks for covering for me, guys.

I didn't tell her I had kids.
It would look like I'm over 50.

Dad, you're 63.

Keep my secret.

It's not right.

Just the little white lie of
an older lover.

What's more, I really like Elisa.
Help me to keep her, please.

Shall I repeat the question?

It would be better,
if you'd told me the answer.

I asked you about your family and
you never spoke about your father.

You want an intimate question?
It couldn't be more intimate.

Intimate and dishonest.

You know what was intimate?
Offering my kidney to your father.

Without knowing him, I offered
my kidney to your father,

and you don't know
my dad's name.

Tick tock.

Tick tock.

-Tick...
-Your father's name is Jesús.

And you don't speak because he left
you and your mother when she was

pregnant with Nacho.

Seeing as you never speak about
your family, I asked your brother.

That's what you do
when your partner matters to you.

I have to go to the bathroom.

He gets emotional seeing his dad
this way.

Sorry, I'm not a pervert.
It's an emergency.

Elisa, Elisa.

Put your hands down,
dumbnuts, I'm alone.

Elisa, I have to tell you
something.

It's the first time I've been
in the ladies.

-It's a bit of an erotic fantasy.
-You came to tell me that?

No, no, no. I'm here to tell you
something that'll freak you out.

Hey... Elisa,

Jesús...

is my father.

You invent nonsense like that so
that I drop him?

I swear it's true.

He's even on my
mobile as a screensaver.

Look.

What?

Peas in a pod!
Couldn't you tell?

No, no, no, it can't be.

It can't...

Here's what we do.

I'll forget about how sick I feel
imagining things.

That way I won't get traumatized.

-And you forget about my father.
-Hey, I think that's my decision.

He's really in love.
He just told me.

If you get married, you'd be my
mother.

And you and me, we've...

Look, I'm leaving
and I'll figure it out for myself.

Wait, wait. If you don't leave him,

I'll tell him about us
and he'll leave you.

Excuse me?

And I'll tell your piggy-wiggy
about our filthy business.

But you don't love my father.
You just want to make me jealous.

What are you talking about,
dumbnuts?

You're stuck on me.

-No, I'm not.
-Oh yes, you are.

-Oh no, I'm not.
-Yes, yes, you are.

-I'm not, I'm not.
-Oh yes, you are, you are.

-No! No! No!
-Yes! Yes! Yes!

We're not shagging, Míriam.

I'll stay here a minute
to make it look okay.

It would look bad
if we leave the bathroom together.

I don't want the house.

So, first you want the house,
then you don't,

-you love me, then you don't.
-I do love you, you idiot!

I only wanted to show you
how much you mean to me.

I never wanted to have a family
until I met you.

How can I show you?

So, you love me.

I believe you, but up 'til when?
Until the therapist showed up?

-He's not...
-Yes, I know he's not a therapist.

Javi,

there's nothing between us.

I saw him coming out of the wardrobe
in his underwear.

I find it hard to believe
it was just a dream.

No one would belive it,
but I saw it with my own eyes!

Can't you see that all this is
crazy?

Hiding someone in a wardrobe
in the XXI century?

Yeah, yeah, that's humiliating,
but I saw the video as well.

Don't make me feel like a dick.
I felt bad enough

when you took me to the consulting
room and didn't tell me.

You don't do that to someone
you want to have a family with.

Are you going to leave like this?

Are you going to let her leave like
that?

Oh!

So funny!

Okay, a pity, but we have to go.

-I'm really enjoying myself.
-Yes.

The two of you make
a great couple.

You seem so in love.

Thanks.

And us?

You could say the same about us
being so in love, couldn't you?

Honey, careful, please.

We'll have to do this again
sometime, won't we?

Yes.

Are you okay, son?

Eh...

Son of a bitch!

Dad.

Mother...!

It's probably my future mother who
is on the other side of the door.

Please don't screw it up.

Hello.

-Hello.
-I'm Claudia.

Eh...

Uh... Claudia?

David's sister,
your new gardener.

Ah, oh...

Wow! What a lovely house
you've got!

Hey... Listen...