All language subtitles for Chi-Raq 2015 yify

Fixed & Synced by bozxphd.Enjoy The Flick

Homicides in Chicago,
Illinois, have surpassed the death toll

of America's Special Forces in Iraq.

Over 400 school-age kids
have been shot this year.

On the weekend of July 4th, 2015,

American Independence Day,

55 people were shot and wounded

and 10 were murdered
including a seven year old boy.

Where was their freedom?

Where was their Right to Life,
Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness?

These overwhelming numbers
of homicides

are committed by young black males

against young black males.

Heaven help us all.

Cairo.

Wassup? Wassup?

Wassup, man? Good? Good?

Yeah, we, good.

Chi-Raq! Chi-Raq!

Chi-Raq! Chi-Raq! Chi-Raq!

Chi-Raq! Chi-Raq! Chi-Raq!

In the year 411 BC,

that's before baby Jesus, y'all,

the Greek Aristophanes
penned a play satirizing his day.

And in the style of his time,
Aristophanes made that shit rhyme.

Transplanted today,
we retain his verse,

to show our love
for the universe.

But warning!
You go' see some pain

but that's only natural
'cause it involves the gangs.

So, before I unfreeze these G's
like the sets you heard before...

People, people, people!

We can't take too much more.

Chi-Raq! Chi-Raq! Chi-Raq!

Chi-Raq! Chi-Raq! Chi-Raq! Chi-Raq!

Everybody make some noise!

Chi-Raq! Chi-Raq! Chi-Raq!

Hey, everyone.

- Young Chop.
- What up, my brother.

- T-Money.
- Yeah.

I love you, baby.

On my soul, this is my city.

It's sprung!

If I can't find him.

I'm find his sister
and his mother and his brother.

If I can't fuck her.

I'm gonna fuck her sister
and her mother and her cousin.

My shooter loadin' up da chopper
shells and he bustin' and he bustin'.

Dat's just how dey do it in my city
what da fuck dey gonna do wit my city.

Gettin' money boy we on it
We grindin' through the struggle.

My hood on my back.

I swear all my niggas love me.

If they see me niggas run.

But I heard they lookin' fo' me.

Y'all ain't really in da field.

Y'all some snitches
Y'all informants.

Ridin' through da ops side of town
And I'm scorin'

if you kill my homey den
I'm gonna kill yours.

Smokin' good weed
Poppin' pills with my boys.

Everybody know it.

Everybody know it.

Pull this fuckin' Toolie out.

And yeah boy I'm scorin'!

Yeah boy I'm scorin'!

Pull this fuckin' Toolie out
And everybody' goin'.

I'm tryin' to lighten up my city.

- My city.
- My city.

- My city.
- My city.

You acted like a fool with da Tool
In my city.

- My city.
- My city.

We poppin' pills, doing drills
In my city.

- My city.
- Chi-Raq.

- Where we at?
- My city.

Chi be on 'dat bullshit
Like dat Jimmy Butler guy.

If I catch a Trojan nigga
I'm gonna make his mama cry

I told you!

I told you!

In da party off of Molly
AH my Spartans rollin'!

Da op say he gonna murder me
Ha! Bitch I'm rollin'!

Da camera ain't shoot him yet.

Don't shoot!

Holy shit!

Back the fuck up.

Back the fuck up!

Tonight was mad hectic, yo.

Shit, I respect it.

My little nigga T-Money
took the hit.

Better be glad
it was just a flesh wound and shit

'cause when my gun go boom,

I'm gonna make sure
Trojan ends up in next room and shit.

Spartan, they never lack
and we attack his bitch.

I swear to God, I empty out
a whole extendo clip.

Ho' ass! Trojan's want to trip over
some text message bullshit.

Three dudes all shot up
behind text messages?

No question.

You know I was scared
for you and me both.

Girl, you know
your nigga is invincible.

You want to kill me?

Those motherfuckers
better bring a E-RAM missile.

Fuck dem niggas from Troy town.

I have been all night
to take your fine ass down.

You ready for the daddy
to smash that cake?

I have got that long D,
I know your ass can't wait.

Freaky deaky all up in that butt.

Come on, girl, let's bust this nut.

It ain't get no gooder.

Girl, you finer
than the granulated sugar.

Guess I better press my luck.

Just like my credit, that's fucked.

We could've got killed.

I got to look at that tonight?

Out of sight.

I got another pistol
that's gonna make everything a'ight.

Just make sure it's loaded.

You know what I like.

You outside? No fun.

And he's inside gettin' some.

You feel?

- Spit your lick.
- Come on, man.

Spark, Jo.

No music, no nothing?

Nothing but the beat of the headboard
bumping when my third leg go thumping.

Slow down.

You got to bring me to romance.

Then maybe like Biggie,
I give yo' ass one more chance.

Okay, okay, well, like Pac say,

Can't wait to get you home.

A'ight.

Get you all alone.

Get you home in my bedroom
Maybe we can bone and get it on.

Got a lot of thug in me.

I want to put it in you.

Hey, goofy.

Why I stay with you?

'Cause you know Chi-Raq.

Make you stand when I crack your back
with the Spartan handle.

Chi, bang it.

Smell somethin'?

- Your ass in my...
- What's that?

What's that?

Fuck!

Oh, shit!

Fuck.

Come on, motherfucker.

Get out of here.

Burn, baby
How you please, baby?

Disco inferno.

Go, go.

You're gonna blow, Trojan.

Hey, baby!

You're dead, nigga!

- You missed me.
- On my mama, you're dead.

Old-ass motherfucker!

Call fire department.

Somebody call fire department.

What are you looking at?

Nothing.

Absolutely nothing.

- What's up, baby?
- Morning, Tuti.

- Hey, Lysistrata. What it do?
- What's up, Spinna?

- Wake up.
- Hey, Dolmedes.

Welcome to Chi-Raq.

The land of pain, misery and strife.

Folks, our windy city been filleted
with a king size butcher knife.

Like a monster from outer space,

the great state of Drillinois
has been hit

by a murderous bigass killer-roid
and that's real shit now.

Where the big money-maker
is the black suit undertaker.

But don't pity our pain.

Might ain't always right,
ain't you heard?

And this coming from a natural man.

Baby, you come face to face
with the super bad Mr. Dolmedes.

My black ass
was on the first box of Wheaties.

I was raised up in a pail
of rusted nails.

Ran butt-naked
through golf ball-sized hail.

Was weaned on thunderbird
from my mama's tities.

Kicked ass from coast to coast,
till both shoe toes were shitty.

Chewed up electric lines
and pissed out lightning bolts.

Hit Godzilla so hard,
it gave my poor daddy a jolt.

Sank the Titanic, with a frozen turd,

then won ten Grammys

and didn't sing or rap
one Goddamn motherfuckin' word.

Now, I told you
about The Signifying Monkey.

And rapped about Shine
but this here tale of two cities,

is one of a kind.

It all started with a gorgeous
nubian sister.

Baby's so fine
she made George Zimmerman

and Darren Wilson wanna kiss her.

As Tough as Coffy
and sexy as Foxy Brown!

Hell, Beyonce Knowles herself
even has to bow down.

They call her Lysistrata.

A woman like no other.

Dis Chocolate Brown Sistah
was Finer'n a Muthafucka!

She could put fear in a Pitbull.
Made Bruce Lee flee.

Knocked out Frazier and Ali,

den ran Money Mayweather up a
sycamore tree.

Wit' a mind like Einstein.
And a truly luscious behind.

What's up girl?

Dat Girl put a Gap-Goodie hurting

on all mankind!

Drive by. Spartans and Trojans
Beefin'.

Lil' Girl Patti-
wuz wrong place, wrong time.

Messed up.

Barbara, did you see the shooter?

Oh, boy.

- Somebody called me to tell me that...
- Ma'am, please.

What happened? What's going on?

My baby-

That's my...

Ma'am, please.

Is that?

- Is that... What happened?
- Ma'am.

You have to go down to the morgue
for identification, ma'am.

That's my baby.

Is that...

- Patti.
- You can't cross the line, ma'am.

Please.

Y'all see somethin'?

Y'all see nothin'?

Ain't nobody out here see nothin'?

And I even can't get to my own child.

I'm sorry, ma'am.

What happened?

Don't touch me!

You don't even deserve

to look at my child's body
laying right on this ground!

None of you.

You gonna get your day, Lysistrata.

You and your damn boyfriend.

You got what's coming for you.

I want you to look at her,
look at her right there.

That's a seven... A little baby!

A baby.

A baby.

I can't take this anymore.

Your daughter is in heaven.

It could be you, next time. Will you
be standin' around lookin' then?

This "Nuthin" ' has no where to go.

Welcome to my home.

Come on in. Come on.

Why don't you move in
with that boy of yours?

Machine Gun Kelly?

Wouldn't be safe.

I suppose he'll be gunnin'
for who set that fire.

Y'all make my tired ass tired.

There are children here in Englewood!
Does that mean anything to you?

Runnin' up the street.
Shootin' and killin'.

Do you care at all?

- Maybe I should leave.
- No. Sit.

Stay.

You're gonna deal with this today.

- You don't have any family?
- No, ma'am.

I'm an orphan.

My moma put me up for
adoption at birth.

I grew up moving from
one Group Home to another.

Lord, help you, child.

Where's your flatscreen?

Malcom X once said,

"The best way to hide something
from negros,"

"is to put it in a book."

Well, I can dig it, Miss Helen.

You sure got mad books.

Books are my life.

My life are books.

- You always lived here?
- No.

I lived in Cabrini Green
back when it was clean,

before they knocked it down.

Oh, lot of black folk
got gentrified across town.

- Who's this?
- My daughter.

Pam.

Let me guess.

- Ten?
- That's right.

Fifth grade, class picture.

Girl, come away from that window!

Chi-Raq.

Chi-Raq.

I hate that name.

It's not who we are.

Chicago has always been
a straight-up gangster town.

- We are not Chi-Raqs.
- What do you call all these shootings?

Crime, doing time.

It's not just about Chicago.

What about Bodymore Murderland?

Killadelphia.

City of brotherly murder.

Bucktown. Brooklyn, New York.

So many people getting shot,
hospitals goin' broke!

I mean, you got to get on the E-way,
people dying enroute.

They can't even file a lawsuit.

I mean, there ain't no trauma centers
here on the Southside.

There was a time in summer
when it got hot,

your child could go outside and play
and not get shot.

- Well, I don't remember that time.
- It existed.

I'm sorry, Miss Helen,
but it's a war zone here.

The US spends money
on the Iraqi people,

to train them, govern them,
helped them build an economy.

Billions and billions in dollars.

The Afghan people too.

They don't do economic development
like that here on Southside.

See, Americans like war.

They like guns.

Fun and games.

Fun and games?

Ask the parents at Sandy Hook.

When they murdered white babies
and things don't change.

Saving black life is way out of range.

I keep thinking of that mother
that lost her child.

You should.

This boy, you with?

- Chi-Raq?
- What?

That's what they call him.

Wait a minute now. Hold on.

They call him Chi-Raq?

Yes, ma'am.

Lord, have mercy.

Well, he's a rapper.

I mean, he's gonna be big time famous.

You really never heard of him?

I heard he was the leader
in this gang mess, girl.

Oh, Miss Helen,
they don't say "gang" anymore.

They say organization.

What is his real name?

His government name?

Nah.

Demetrius.

Demetrius DuPree.

Demetrius DuPree.

His father?

All Chi's told me
is that he died in prison.

He's got a good heart
deep down inside.

I love him.

- I can change Chi.
- Darling.

People change
when they decide to change.

You make it sound so easy.

All you can do
is create an environment for change.

Like an alcoholic,
you take away his booze.

You just try taking away their guns.

All right.
Well, what else do they love?

- Getting turned up, making money.
- What else?

Yeah, Well.

Pick up your phone.

Google.

Leymah Roberta Gbowee
is a Liberian peace activist

responsible for leading
a women's peace movement

that helped bring an end

to the Second Liberian Civil War
in 2003.

You go and do it.

Irene, your daughter is another
victim to the senseless violence

here in Englewood
on the Southside of Chicago.

What do you want people to know?
What can people do?

You know these babies don't asked
to be caught in the middle of this.

They don't.

If y'all know anything,
if you've seen anything,

heard anything, please,
do something, say something.

I mean, where's your heart?

What's up, girlfriend?

You unhappy stayin'
at Miss Helen's crib?

You know how old people live.

That ain't the thing, Rasheeda.

- I'm on fire.
- Burn, baby, burn.

We agreed to hook up, make this plan.

Where da Females at? Huh?

Laid up with some man.

Oh, no.

Hell not! Marcy! Tee Tee!

- It was today?
- Damn right, it was today.

Y'know I was waitin'
for a line from Jackson.

He's in Afghan, seein' action.

Waitin' for his call,
I went to the mall.

Lil' Man wanted some Cap'n Crunch.

He'll eat it for breakfast
or maybe lunch.

Get in the damn car.

Whose crib this be?

- Indigo.
- Indigo?

Isn't that Cyclops' main squeeze?

Cyclops's bae?

Yo, I got dem in purple.

She a woman. We all black women.

That's the matter at hand, sister.

Yeah, yeah, I can dig da Sister Apps!

But make sure dey don't bust no caps.

Can I help you?

'Sup, Indigo?

Are you CoverGirl clean,
mad figure, brick shit house, mean!

This about who set your house on fire?

- What dese tired strags want?
- What y'all want!?

Chill wit da shrill,
before I whoop yo' butt, slut.

Are you serious? You are at my door.

I got a kid with me, y'all. Relax.

- Calm down.
- Peace, peace and hair grease.

- Check your girl.
- Check her.

Check the ignorance.

- We all sisters here.
- Bitch, I ain't your sister.

This is my runnin' partner, Dania.

- My ace boon koon, Hecuba.
- What?

And I know you know Kenya, the rapper.

I ain't putting out fear
so what ya tryin' to steer?

God Forbid, Cyclops find you
Spartan chicks up in here.

Everybody in here got a man
in orange and purple colors.

Bangin' and slangin',
fighting for a flag,

risking that long zip
of the cadaver bag.

- That's how we live.
- That's how we die.

You want to loose your man
to a drive-by?

In a pinebox before he's 25.

- I lost my cousin.
- And I lost my little brother.

I lost my nephew.

My uncle got killed two weeks ago.

And like always, nobody saw nothin'.

All to the bang, bang.

Bang, bang.

We've all lost people, too.
Many a sister and brother.

Now, I'd like to see
Cyclops and Chi put down that mess

between the Trojan and the Greeks,
but that day looks bleak.

What if we could devise a method
to end the bloodshed?

Yo count on me. You need money?

I'll pawn all the gold around my neck,
den git turned up 'till I'm a wreck!

I'm ready to split myself
up the middle, to give you half.

I'm down for the cause but how?

We force our men to negotiate peace

by exercising cocksure self control

and total abstinence
from knockin' the boots.

I never did like you Trojan
chicken heads any-goddamn-way so...

- Oh, hell, no.
- You got to get out of here.

- Y'all kickin' us out?
- Yeah, out of here.

- Shoot 'em up.
- Bang, bang.

Please, please, just sit down.

We ain't gonna be dat long,
Rasheeda, shut up!

- Give me one more minute.
- Hey, I got my son with me,

I got to go.

Marcy, this has to do with your son.

Just a minute ago, you were ready
to split yourself up the middle.

Go ahead so that
you Spartans can get out of here.

I just saw a mother weepin'
in the streets.

Her baby's blood spilt.

Man, you really think
somethin' like that could bring peace?

Y'all know the power we have over them
withholding with just a day.

A week? Imagine a month.

A year.

They are gonna bring the peace.

Suppose, suppose
that the men just dump us.

If we all hold out,
who can they go to?

The thots!

Dem hoes o'er there.

Well, we will enlist them too.

We want our men alive,
we want our babies to thrive,

we gonna have to organize.

Repeat after me.

I will deny all rights of access
or entrance...

I will deny all rights

of access or entrance...

from every husband, lover,
or male acquaintance...

from every husband, lover,
or male acquaintance...

who comes to my direction,
in-erection...

who comes to my direction,
in-erection...

Come on, say it.

Girl, can't cheat us.

I can't do this. No.

If he should force me to lay
on that conjugal couch...

if he should force me to lay
on that conjugal couch...

I will refuse his strokin',
not give up that nappy pouch.

I will refuse his stroke,
not give up that nappy pouch.

- No peace...
- No pussy.

The red wine has been drunk,
the plan has now struck.

Dolmedes must tell you fellas,
y'all about to get punked.

Lysistrata had them all
take a solemn oath,

"Stop the murder madness,
or there would be no more pokes.”."

Some even thought the shit was hoax.

How could dem females give up
long dick and da down stroke?

This must be some bullshit.

Ain't no fucking way.

But y'all about to find out

these gals don't play.

No more punane, nookiepie,
beehive or honeybun.

No coochie, no nappy dugout.
That's right.

You get none.

Say what?

To be so smart,
y'know you're tweakin' right?

You Lame as Hell, playin' games for
real wit' dis whack-ass panty strike.

And that's the shit we don't like.

You want to choose to be ruled,

bitches gonna be tight
when you make they lose their dudes.

I dunno who you think
you're tryin' to change.

I'm Trojan through and through,
that's stronger than any damn screw.

It' even bigger than you.

All you care about
is this tired gangster game.

Well, it's lame.

You think you'll die with fame?

Negro, two days later
no one will even remember your name.

Your machismo's really masochism.
That's why we cuttin' off da jism!

As long as you love the life
more than a wife,

we strike.

Why you so frigid?

Baby, let me thaw you out
with this ice-pick.

Know you can't resist
the chocolate lick.

Chill out.

This next move is the best move
and it's gonna be smooth...

Fine. Remember that
little Kiddie Rhyme.

Three, Six, Nine, Indigo Drank Wine.

Made her Chicks walk this No Sex Line.

But the Line Broke!
Them Bitches Choked!

And Lysistrata
and her "Former" "Friends"

got replaced by some tighter pokes.

Bye.

- Be...
- Safe.

What's happenin'
with the jump off bacchos?

We got the cheese, where's the nachos?

Why you got the club on lock, yo?

- It's rough up in here.
- It's saturday night.

- We gettin' tight?
- Not tonight.

Ain't No partyin'.
No dancin'. No gettin' down!

- Why?
- Ain't a broad to be had!

Just a bunch of hardheads goin' stag.

It's the same all over town.
Clubs is closin' down!

Man, these womens have vanished!

Even the hoes is no shows!

What the fuck is this?

What the hell?

I'll be god-damned.

What the hell?

Shit...

All right, peep this,
I got 30 girls strippin' for me

another five on loan. And none of em',

is answering the god damn phone.

That shit is wack!

Yeah man, at this time of night
the champagne room be full of life!

Young boys puttin' dollar bills in
the drawers of all my pretty thrills!

Cyclops, we have
been struck by a plague

that will put that Biblical pestilence
shit to shame!

And this famine affects
only the lower regions, where all you

young Trojans
do most of your thinkin'!

I mean, this is the male side
of the aisle,

if you can't squeeze it,

you at least wanna tease it.

But these ho's have literally
shut down the penis power grid!

So my questions to y'all...

ls what you muthafuckas done did?

The situation's out of control,

'cause I'm in front
of an empty stripper pole.

But you still got souls,
so you know, your pole is gold.

Cyclops, keep your eye on me.

Yeah, we got you, Morris.
Don't worry about this, I got this.

Got it between my crosshairs.

What you need is another eye.

There's not even
half an ass to look at.

One of these days you're gonna get
tired of them one-eyed jokes.

Sorry man, I'm a little uptight,

'cause there ain't no pussy
in the club tonight!

- Where's yours on standby?
- I can't sell standby.

I need some active duty,
first class vagina!

You need active duty booty.

Active duty booty.

Glad you can find humor in this.

Damn, that shit just come to me,
I don't know how.

You know what, man. I would like
to have somebody on that pole tonight.

Beast. Pole, baby.

It's not that kinda club, young man.

What kind of insubordination
is this shit?

- No. We got it, Boss.
- You need all you can get!

Relax. I got this.

- Do it, son. Yeah, do that shit.
- Spin!

Hey Big Thelma, where you goin'?

To The US Virgin Islands,
a place my girls ain't never seen.

Where you girls be at?

My bitches told me to go,
say they're honorin' the strike,

said they don't care who likes.

- A ho strike?
- Shit yeah.

- Good thing I'm a Dyke.
- You believe this shit?

The Heavens declare
Your greatness and power.

Creation proclaims
The work of Your hands.

Holy.

Holy.

Your people seek out
Exalting Your name.

Jesus, Lord, forever you reign.

Holy.

Holy.

Holy.

He is our King
Worthy of honor and praise.

He is our God.

Awesome and mighty to save.

Oh Power, Oh Glory.

Oh Praise to Your name.

Oh Power, Oh Glory.

Oh Praise to Your name.

The Heavens declare
Your greatness and power.

Creation proclaims,
The work of your hands.

Holy.

Holy.

He is a King
Worthy of honor and praise.

He is our God
Awesome and mighty to save.

Oh Power Oh Glory.

Oh Praise to Your name.

Oh Power Oh Glory.

Oh Praise to Your name.

Yeah! Glory!

We don't mourn like other people.
Hallelujah.

Praise Him!

Praise Him. Can I get a Glory!

Glory!

- Can I get an Amen!
- Amen!

I'm going to talk about a life today.

An important life in our community.

A life that ends life.

The life of a gun.

This gun began its professional career

when it was purchased
by "Tiny Tony" from Chicago.

At an Indiana Gun Show,

using a fake Indiana ID.

And bypassed all of our
strict gun laws.

Chicago gangs buy the guns

for big money.

Break it down.

For their work
in the Underground Economy.

Tell the truth!

The Underground Economy exists

because banks and lending institutions

rarely loan money to poor people.

Is that right?

Their children,
however admire the thug life.

But they do so from the safety
of suburban Chicago!

Kenilworth, Wilmette, Highland Park.

No, this gun wouldn't
be caught dead there!

This gun is the principal player
in a reality TV urban murder show,

that can be seen every night
at five and ten.

Every channel! On any news show
you want to watch!

And that's when this gun...

Met our child Patti.

Patti.

Patti is gone

because our politicians
are in the pocket

of the National Rifle Association.

And have become their mouthpieces
or silent co-conspirators.

Patti is gone

because of an economy
that has abandoned the poor.

Downtown they say unemployment
is at 5.7%...

How's that sound?

Right here in Auburn-Gresham,
unemployment is 21%.

And that doesn't even count people
who have given up hope

and stopped looking for work.

The per capita income is $12,000.

42% of us live below the poverty line.

30% don't have a high school diploma.

- What America are they living in?
- Yes!

We go from third rate schools,

to first class, high tech prison!

Mass incarceration,
is the new Jim Crowe.

Our Patti is gone

because gang members
are more concerned

with popping pills
and popping bottles.

More concerned with what's on YouTube!

More concerned with ego!

Street cred and greed
than a human life.

Patti is gone because guns have become
a part of America's wardrobe,

where it's easier to get a gun
than a computer.

Sirens and gunshots

are our soundtrack.

Yellow police tape, teddy bears,
T-shirts, balloons,

these are the national memorials
of our neighborhoods.

And it doesn't look good.

Take your time.

It didn't look good.

When the sky turned dark.

And the sun refused to shine.

And the earth began to quake.

And they laid Jesus' lifeless body
at the arms of Mother Mary!

And I don't need to go back
to Biblical times.

It didn't look good
in a Birmingham church

when four little girls
were blown apart by hate!

It didn't look good,

when Medgar was laying
bleeding to death in his driveway.

It didn't look good, when Malcolm
was shot down on the Audubon stage.

And didn't look good,
when Martin Luther King

stood on the balcony of
the Lorraine Motel outside Room 306,

and at 6:03 was taken from us.

And no, it doesn't look good...

Not when Patti was lost
on a busy street,

with folks going to work and school,

with cars passing by.

How is it possible that not one
witness has come forward?

- Not one!
- How is it possible

that no one has the courage
and the conscience to speak up

- for this family!
- Somebody knows.

Somebody knows.

Cynics say,
"Well if I snitch I'll be killed too."

First of all,
when a murderer walks free,

we are all in danger.

But if multiple folks come forward,

multiple folks who
witnessed these murders

there is no one target.

What makes someone
a target is not the shooter.

What makes someone
a target is the community

that surrenders to fear.

And becomes silent!

That's why we at St. Sabina

must put out a $5,000 reward
for information

leading to the arrest
of Patti's killer.

Or any killer!

Because we need to say loud and clear,

you cannot murder our children!

You cannot murder our children
then go back to the crib.

Turn on Sportscenter,
eat a Whopper and fries

and act like nothing ever happened!

We will not allow this
self-inflicted genocide to continue.

This is a disgrace!

Patti lives!

And Patti will have justice!

- Do you have faith?
- Yes!

- Do you want justice?
- Yes!

- Are you willing to get up and walk?
- Yes!

Get up! Hope wins! Peace wins!

Goodness wins! Righteousness wins!

Love wins! Love wins! Love wins!

Police Sirens, everyday.

People Dyin', everyday.

Mamas cryin', everyday
Fathers tryin', everyday.

Tryin' get my head straight.

Dis da city of Chi-Raq
Where you could get ya bed made.

I see death round da corner
Boy I dodge him like I owe 'em.

I don't talk if I don't know him
Niggas plottin' niggas On Me.

Boy, I lost homies
Some died, some crossed on me.

I Love da niggas dats down for me.

Hey, what up?

Man, you got a lot of stuff
out here on this table.

You got everything going, don't you.

It's too much, man.

Yeah, trying to keep my mind
off that bullshit.

Man, I don't want you fucked up
like me, man.

Fuck around be in a chair.

Can't move your legs.

Gotta wear motherfucking undergarment.

Like shitting
and pissing on yourself.

Nothing. Got to put these
damn braces on.

These motherfuckers.

Everyday, these reminders. Of what?

Do I want to throw the ass up?

All right, we gotta wake up, man.

Look at me, man.
Fucking tired of this shit.

I gave my whole life for this shit
and I got nothing in return.

This Trojan war and shit, we gotta
slow this shit down.

My son got shot,
he in a wheelchair now.

Quadriplegic.

Cat just stood over 'em, kept dumpin'
14 times, for what?

This ain't livin'. This ain't life.

We gotta do somethin' different, bro.

You gotta do somethin' different,
wake up every day to get high.

Cry, go to funerals.
Ain't you tired of this shit, man?

Don't you want to do
something different?

Please pray for my city
Too much hate in my city.

Too many heartaches in my city
But I got faith in my city.

Dis Chi-Raq and I love dat
You can't take it away from my city.

Some can't relate to my city
Dey die everyday in my city

40's get clapped dis story a fact.

Niggas can't shoot
So babies get whacked.

Dats how it is in Chi-Raq and y'all
Mad 'cause I don't call it Chicago.

But I don't live in no fucking Chicago.

Boy I live in Chi-Raq.

At first, I thought you
were all insane.

But upon further review,

as a man that has taken
a vow of celibacy,

I know the power
of the sexual appetite.

I know this fruit is ripe.

But understand, your ruse
won't bring a truce.

- What will bring the peace?
- How about a job?

Affordable housing. A good education.

Purpose and hope.
There's a lot of hate out there.

A lot of self hate.
A lot of racial hate.

- That Charleston Massacre.
- Murdered at a prayer meeting.

- Hate crimes.
- Assassinations.

- Domestic terrorism.
- South Cack-A-Lacky.

First to secede, last to concede.

They built the citadel
to take on mother Emanuel.

It's the oldest AME church
in the south.

Founded by Denmark Vesey in 1822.

Their heritage is white supremacy
through and through.

That evil young Klansman, that boy
Dylan "Storm" Roof,

He's the proof, post racial poof.

- Storm wants his country back.
- Storm ain't gettin' it!

- It ain't his!
- Storm's from a way of hate.

We may not be able to relate

but those murders came
from a lower Carolina State.

Historically speaking,
evil's in that boy's blood...

But now the brothers on the block.

They do the white man's
murderous biddin' for him.

Now that form of hate,
we can't translate.

It enunciates
"I will exterminate myself

- "my kind. Me."
- Us.

The question remains

can your plan save "US" from "US"?

Ain't that your boy?

General King Kong?

He wishes.

That's why I quit.

You know John Brown raided
an armory at Harpers Ferry

when he freed the slaves.

Show me what you're made of.
Right here. Right now.

General King Kong?

I wanna enlist!

Young Lady, speak to one
of our recruiting sergeants.

No, General. My bestie, Rasheeda,

she served under you.

She told me,
"Get behind that General King Kong."

Said you a "Commanding" Officer.

Young lady,

may I speak to you, in private?

Dick.

H. W. Rice-a-Roni. W. Rummy.

No Clinton?

Where's President Hussein Obama?

I'd rather have an African Lion in
the White House than a lyin' African.

You're too funny, General.

Young Lady, I'm about to show you
something few people have seen.

This is one of the most important
artifacts of the Civil War.

Affectionately known
as Whistling Dick.

Because of the terrifying sound
it made

when it went off
and wreaked its deadly havoc.

It saved our rebs time and time again.

What do you call this, General?

The Rammer.

Let me show you how this works.

You shove it in the hole. Like so.

Push it down,
real low as far as it will go

and you pull it out real slow.

Look at you, General.

- I'm always prepared.
- Oh, suckie suckie now!

You know what would get me
really Ala-Bam-Mee hot?

What? Tell me now.

Watch you mount old "Whistling Dick."

- Ride it?
- Yeah!

Yeah, like you're
old General Stonewall Jackson.

Comin' to rescue lil' darky me
from those Yankees.

- That'll turn you on?
- Yeah!

I'm not just whistlin' Dixie.

Here we go! Come on!

Ride it! You like that!

Yeah!

Let that pretty black steel ride up
your pretty pale crack.

Sonofabitch, this is good.
This is good.

- You like that, General?
- Come here, you black stallion,

it's time to light this cannon.

Wait...

- One more thing.
- What?

Now this right here, General,
this will really turn me on.

But, I'm blind.

- I'm blind.
- Yes, you are.

Now give me those hands.

You want my fingertips,
what you gonna do with them?

I want all of you, like that.

That's so sweet.

- Sweetie, come on.
- Feel that?

- You mine now, General.
- Here we go.

I'm your whistling dick!
I'm your little whistling dick.

Whistle! Whistle like you want it, baby!

Now come here you Lil'
Nappy-Headed Ho.

Come on Mau-Mau!

Bring it, my little Burr-Head!

Come on! Here we go!

Wait a minute.

What in tarnation is this?

This is an act of treason.

You a Black Nigra ISIS?

Come on! Move it!

Freeze! Don't move!

Please don't shoot!

Is this the po-lice or Seal Team 2?

And you surprised there's derision?

If this was your neighborhood,
what would you do?

Look at all this weaponry.

Shit looks like an invasion,
not a persuasion!

All this for some
unarmed women of color.

I think somethin' got lost
in translation!

They say they come
to protect and serve.

But da real truth is

they get the chance they'll treat

these girls like
Eric Garner sellin' loosies.

Let's get truthy!

Cops and gangs. Black and brown folks
stuck in the middle.

Shit's on fire y'all,
I can hear Nero's fiddle.

Can't trust the po-lease.

Afraid of the gangs.

This whole
muthafuckin' thing is insane!

What happened to the officer
on the beat,

and this banger sure
ain't mama and them lil' treat.

First, I want to thank
you all for showing up.

We all know that enough

is enough and too much stinks,

so we need to come
together in agreement.

- About this oath.
- What oath?

Swearing off the One-Eyed monster.

What?

Miss Helen, as an attorney,
I know the trip.

I convict our youngsters
to this new slave ship.

If I do take the oath,
how will it sink that bloody boat?

Althea, it won't work!

You just like having your man
by the "Jackie Robinson."

Right. And that's why
sugar pie man don't stray.

I keeps that bone dry,

and also keeps myself lookin' fly.

So that's why you wear them too tight
numbers, fish nets. Daisy Dukes.

Big old rippled up ass
hangin' out the shoot?

Y'all wanna laugh? It's funny?

Broke ass Destiny's Child over here,
you wanna laugh!

Don't talk about my big ass.

We all got some bumps and bruises
and cigarette burns on asses.

- Speak for yourself.
- What about you and your man?

Old Duke wanna hit that big butt?

You ain't gonna give it up?

Old Duke and me is separated!

Girl, please.
You still wanna hit that.

Even if I did, which I don't.

I will not violate the oath.

Now, sisters this isn't a joke.

We all have a stake in this fray,
you know mine,

so forget about your personal needs.

I be damned if another child bleeds.

Dr. Aesop has the floor.

A woman wise beyond her years.

Maybe she can help us
dry this river of tears.

As a pediatrician, for 50 years

I was dedicated to preserving life.

God, nature, the higher powers,

put more nerves into a man's thing
than he ever did in his brain.

Thus, the women,
must "Save The Babies."

Save the babies!

It's time to get that
gate of motherhood locked up!

Lock it up.

Hold up! Hold the fuck up!

If I lose my man,
Imma cut all of y'all!

Fuck it. Lock it up.

Knights of Euphrates. These females
say this gonna stop the gangs.

Ain't this a Blip!
"Silly Rabbits on a Stone Cold Trip!"

I told Sugar Pie
before I left the house.

Apollo ain't no goddamn mouse.

She don't wanna give it up. I'll find
me some brand new fresh ass butt!

Too much ass for all that trash.

Hey, ain't y'all heard,

the phone sex women,
they honorin' the strike.

And the porno, all closin' the nookie,

I mean not even a fuckin' lookie.

Fellas they shuttin' it all down
tighter than fish pussy.

And you know that shit's waterproof.

What you got to say, Oedipus?

Well, I asked my mommie last night
and she said, "The women are right."

- Your mommie?
- Yes.

Light skinny nigga, sometimes I think
you married to your damn mommie.

Well, I love my mother
and my mommie loves me.

Gentlemen, I am proud to say I was
breastfed until I was 12 years old.

TMI!

I hear some straight dudes been making
late night appearances

on "Queer Sex For The Straight Guy."

Yeah, and the brothers
on the down low.

Even they sayin' "No blow."

- Nigga, what you say?
- How I know that? I don't know.

Well, at my age,
I thought my Misses was just a pest.

But Lord have mercy,
she's a sexual terrorist!

And who do we have to blame?

- Oprah?
- Women's Lib?

Uppity ass women?

Let's give them frails
a dose of their own damn tails.

We'll let them twilly tarts know,
who makes em' groan

and moan and hoot!

And brings home the damn loot!

So what we gonna do, Old Duke?

We took dose flags once,
we can take em' again.

Pointdexter is old
but he can still go!

- You sayin' do it ourselves?
- That's the plan, Stan.

Unless you always want to have
that in your greasy old hand.

Knights Of Euphrates, rise up!

Like the battles of the past,

we shall come together
to whoop some female ass.

Let us not stand
for their flappin' lips,

nor their chronic naggin' bullshit.

- Are we mice or men?
- Men!

We shall redeem the power of our breed

with one mighty thrust into
the misty mist and the dusky dusk.

What makes a muskrat guard his musk?

Courage!

- What makes the Sphinx the 7th wonder?
- Courage!

What makes the dawn
come up like thunder?

Courage!

What makes Venus Hottentot so hot?
What puts the dance in the robot?

What we got that they ain't got?

Courage?

Fuck no! A dick and two balls.

Miss Helen, I see you out
here with all these ladies today,

what do you hope to accomplish?

Lysistrata's Platform coincides
with the Mayor's.

Ten Point Plan to end gun violence.

Her demand are our demands!

Why do you think your
demands and your plan

will work better than
what the mayor is planning?

Because we have one,
and it's to save our children!

We need to stop this violence
in the street.

He's distracted. He has many things
that he's concerned about.

We are concerned about our babies,
we are talking to our men in our homes

in the bedroom.
I think they'll listen there!

I ain't in no gang.
You telling me you gonna stop giving

my girl from giving me what I need
because your man

is the leader of a gang and he out
there shootin' and killin' people.

- Don't make sense.
- I don't understand that.

I ain't a part of that party.

I'm old enough to know, I'm supposed
to do what I'm supposed to do.

She old enough to know she supposed to
do what she supposed to do.

Now the young kids, they the ones out
here trippin' like dat.

- No peace! No pussy!
- Women! You need us!

Do your duty and give up that booty.

No peace! No pussy!

Negotiate then copulate!

Women! You need us!

Do your duty and give up that booty.

No Peace! No pussy!

Do your duty and give up that booty.

No peace! No pussy!

Do your duty and give up that booty.

No peace! No pussy!

Negotiate then copulate!

That's where they are. What we can do
is bring in a team here...

I wonder who sent him?

So what is this, Chief?

At approximately 15:00 hours

75 women took possession
of the armory.

They had hostages, they released them.

- Women did this?
- Black and brown women.

- Black and brown women?
- Just black and brown women.

- How many dead?
- Zero.

- Just wounded?
- Nada.

They were packing big muscle?

No sir, they appear to be unarmed.

- How many?
- Approximately 75, sir.

Are you telling me,
that 75 black and brown women

took a United States Military Armory,
unarmed?

Yes, sir.

"No peace. No Pussy."

What the hell is going on, Riptide?

Don't let all that foolishness outside
scare you.

The Armory's our chastity belt.

I will deny all rights
of access or entrance.

To every husband, lover,
or male acquaintance.

Who comes to my direction in erection.

If he should force me
to lay on that conjugal couch.

I will refuse his stroke
and not give up that nappy pouch.

I will not lift my house shoes
to touch thy thatch.

Or submit hangdog
and part with the snatch.

- No peace! No pussy!
- No peace! No pussy!

- Lock it up! Lock it up!
- Lock it up! Lock it up!

- Hello?
- Jesus H. Christ!

- Mr. Mayor...
- Hang on!

Everybody out there
in the world take this too,

you're part of this, take this vow!

Did you know this woman
used to work for my office?

No. I didn't know that, Your Honor.

It's your job to know.
She was a secretary.

But she's not typing letters anymore.

Oh no, she's getting
the other secretaries

to walk off the job.

She's leading a revolt.

I could lose the female vote
over this stupid joke!

Jesus, you know
how we feel about this baloney.

I can't afford to look like a phoney!

Damned if I do, damned if I don't.

Either way, I'm gonna
have a freaking stroke!

Let's see how serious they are.

What's your meaning?

Perhaps we should
let them get the feeling.

- The feeling?
- Instead of us breaking in,

we close them off, build a perimeter,
a wall around them.

- A wall?
- Operation hot and bothered.

Why don't we surround the Armory
with speakers

and blast them one of those romantic
slow jams from the 70s.

Those croonin' brothers
will make those mommies wet

and make them wanna jet!

Those Chastity-Belters will end
their sex strike and climb mount pike!

We run the ball
right down their throats!

With total male pride.

Mayor, you win this
by their appetite

and never have to say you were right.
You never attack or call them weak

and you always, seek the peace.

You're a deviant bastard.

That's why I went
into public service, Your Honor.

Touchdown bears!

- No peace! No pussy!
- No peace! No pussy!

Lysistrata! Lysistrata!

Hello. Hi, good afternoon, excuse me.

Would you happen
to be Ms. Clara Worthy?

No, sir. And who might you be?

I am Mr. Morrowburns.

How might I help you, sir?

Ms. Clara Worthy, is she around?

Is this the right address?
6328 Elizabeth Avenue, right?

- Yes it is.
- Do you know a Ms. Clara Worthy?

Well, I better.
Clara is my younger sister.

I'm Ms. Helen Worthy.

Wonderful. Pleased to meet you.

I love your garden,
it's very beautiful.

Why, thank you.

- And is your sister here?
- No, sir. You just missed her.

Clara's gone on up to Jackson,
Mississippi, visit our parents.

- You're kidding.
- Yeah. She left last night.

I have cousins in Jackson.

- Do you?
- I do. We might be kin.

- Could be.
- Could be.

Listen, could you give your sister
a message for me please?

Well, that's gonna depend
on the message.

Right.

"Red, White,
and Blue Insurance Company?"

We got word in the home office
that your sister has a young son.

A teenager by the name
of Homer Worthy.

I came to tell your sister
that she really should...

Consider taking out
a life insurance policy on Homer.

Because I'm sure you know that young,
black, boys on the South-side are...

More than likely to be shot
and or killed.

And so the Red, White
and Blue Insurance Company is

hoping to help a single mother
like your sister

in case of a tragedy because,
of course, it is always better

to be safe than to be sorry...

Mr. Burnsmorrow,
whatever your name is...

- Morrowburns.
- If you don't leave here right now,

right this second, you are gonna need

a goddamn insurance policy
your goddamn self,

coming up here in my garden
with this bullshit.

Leave! Leave!

- It's Morrowburns.
- Do you think I give a flying fuck

about your fucked up name?

Get on off the street, man!

Have a nice day, ma'am.

Go back up to the big house
and you tell them it didn't work.

Have a nice day, ma'am.

Out here trying to take advantage
of your own goddamn people.

If anybody's seen or heard anything...

Come on, ladies. You got children.

Have any information, let us know.

- Save our babies!
- Save our babies!

Back up sucker,
don't give us no smack!

Or we'll beat you to death
with pampers, gerbers and similac.

Talk that talk,
but you're going to jail.

And don't even think 'bout bail.

Who do you think you are? Rosa Parks?
What a damn farce.

Yo, we in a hurry like a Ferguson
and Staten Island jury.

Those judges were fair,
look y'all, nobody cares!

Trayvon Martin, Mike Brown,
Tamir Rice, Walter Scott,

Rekia Boyd and Freddie Gray,
black lives matter, everyday.

Not just when you trigger happy cops
go astray.

Dude, you think
sista' Sandra Bland hung herself?

You kill us with impunity.

You give them the opportunity.

'Cause we kill each other like flies,

you rogue cops
think you can capitalize.

You thugs don't care about each other.
Why should we?

Thugs? Who the fuck
you calling a thug?

Because we are we.

No matter what our problems are,
we deserve respect.

Even though our lives ain't perfect,
we deserve respect!

Even though we live in terror town,
we deserve respect.

And if you don't understand that,
then brother, step back.

You and your Dr. Ben Carson lack!

Kill it! Killing dat pussy, huh!

Chi-Raq! No!

- Wanna cum? Yeah.
- Yeah...

How'd you learn to make love so good?

Repetition.

They call Chi-Raq the pussy magician!

You are crazy like glue.

Yeah.

One time, I saw my mom
and this dude getting it in.

Right after my daddy got killed,

Dude named Blue Monday used
to come round

and try to pimp on my morn.

She turned a few rent tricks, I think.

Kill me!

Kill me!

Kill me!

Kill this pussy. Kill this pussy.

Come on.

Nigga, didn't I tell your skinny
black ass to knock

before you come into my bedroom?

- I'm sorry, Mommy.
- Demetrius, close the goddamn door.

Demetrius, go!

Did you understand
they was making love?

That's what they were doing?

Looked more like fighting,
fucking and screwing.

Blue Monday knew
that I saw him in moms,

her name was Lucy.

So one day he just pulled me aside,
yanked my chain

lays me with the game, tell me how
to pull bitches and everything.

Then he soft-pitched me
my first piece.

I was like twelve years old...

Taught me how to be a man and shit.

Handed me his baddest bottom bitch

as a present for washing his Cadillac.

- God.
- I know, right.

I should've got like two
or three bitches!

Washed the shit out of that Cadillac.

Where's your moms now?

Demetrius, close the goddamn door!

Fuck off. Talk about my morn...

This is an emergency.

We're all here for peace, right?

Yeah.

I wanna hear you scream for peace.
Can y'all scream for peace?

Yeah.

Because that's what we want,
and that's what we're about.

We gotta stop the killing.
We gotta stop the killing.

Chi-Raq, what's doing?

You know how we do Tiny Tim.

What's up, man. It's all there.

Okay, them dirty poppers.

- Oh, right!
- Try to stop us.

- Keep it coming like that.
- Yeah, sure.

Ho. Gents!

Holes in the Trojan the size
of the ozone, you know it!

Chicago's peace is our Selma!

Brothers and sisters,
it is time to cross the bridge.

- Put down the guns!
- Put down the guns!

- Don't shoot!
- Don't shoot!

- Stop the violence!
- Stop the violence!

- What do we want?
- Peace!

- Save our babies!
- Save our babies!

It's Dick-Day! Omaha Beach!

And Uncle Sam's pulled out everything
but the bedroom sheets.

Now, they hooking up
the Noriega speakers.

Remember Panama, y'all?

That was the one before the other one
before the other one, as I recall.

Well, them atomic woofers and tweeters

made General Manuel's machete snap.

Too many DBs for them pock mocks
to bear, plus he's ugly as crap.

Our boys caught that dick-tator
in a rock n' roll trap.

So, now the commies' too, figured out
how to make those pussies clap.

A black headed woman make
a freight train jump the track,

a long, tall gal make
a preacher ball the jack.

A blond headed woman
make a good man leave town

and a redheaded woman
make a boy slap his pappy down.

Ashes to ashes, dust to dust,

this sex strike go on much longer,
Bishop T D Jakes gonna cuss.

Operation Hot and Bothered.

We turn them on,
they'll turn themselves in.

We'll stick those prick teasers
in the federal pen.

Oh, honey, I'd be in trouble
If you left me now

'Cause I don't know
Where to look for love.

I just don't know how.

Oh, girl, how I depend on you.

To give me love when I need it.

Right on time you would always be.

All my friends call me a fool.

They say,
Let the woman take care of you.

So I try to be hip and think like.

The crowd.

But even the crowd
Can't help me now.

Oh...

Oh boy.

Tell me what am I gonna do.

I know I've gotta guilty face.

But I feel so out of place.

Oh, yeah.

Gonna be on my way.

I can't stay here...

Ladies, I found these earplugs
in the artillery room!

It should help drown out the bombing.

Booty... Booty... Booty...

Booty... Booty... Booty...
Booty... Booty... Booty...

My God, he's got booty on the brain...

- For God's sake, do something!
- Yes, sir!

Wheel him outta here!

Poontang on the membrane.

I want a big booty! I want
a small booty! So fine!

I do like those Chi-Lites, though.

Eugene Record, lead singer,
wrote most of their songs.

Yo, peoples, dig.

The problem with them
quiet storm slow jam grooves,

is everybody gets
in a baby making mood!

It's been three months,
y'all, can you believe it?

A long hard three.

This is no longer a test.
It's a national emergency.

Pussy! I need some motherfucking twat
and I need it now.

It's making me fucking insane.

God damn!

That boy's balls were bright blue.

He's an 18 wheeler
carrying a heavy load

whose arrival's overdue.

But like Wild Bill told Monica
on her way down,

"Don't let that shit drip,
they'll use it as evidence."

Let's speak on something else
don't make no sense!

Remember the two concert gunmen?

Let's check in on those fools.
See how they doing.

So, y'all remember me?
But did y'all know my mission?

Kill those Spartan niggas
before intermission.

Those bullets severed my spine.
Tore up my behind.

Now, I'm unable to walk.
Thank God I can still talk.

I was Chi's boy.

What I'm now, I can't say.

What did I seek? To be monster Greek?

Being thug is what I loved.
How you like me now?

Lost a kidney, a spleen,
most of my digestive tract.

One goddamn bullet, dawg,
that's the keeping it 100 fact.

Now I'm fed through an IV. I can
barely pee, Jack. I'm no longer me.

What it means to be 18 and black.

This is Sparta?

Squad! Gang!

My nigga's, what is this? We Spartans!

Spartans are supposed to hold them
hostage with the sausage.

Y'all motherfuckers got it?
Spartans! I don't know why you crying

like somebody canceled Kwanzaa
and Christmas.

Stead of lying in the trenches
y'all acting like a bunch of bitches!

Sir, we just wanna check
into to Betty Ford,

get back to sexual healing.
You know we reeling.

What I care if these foo foo heifers
lit y'all, up and negated the back.

I'm Chi-Raq, nigga. I cuts no slack.

So y'all going back to your little BB
and Bobby Blue Bland rhythm.

Chi' don't get the blues, nigga.
I give them.

Old ass Otis, know!

This strike got Spartans
in purple drawers with blue balls.

Well shit, Spartan, that's on y'all!

Born in Chi-Raq!

- Fucking limp.
- I don't know what you mean.

Oh, no. I put good paper
out on Chi-Raq,

why that motherfucker ain't dead!

Can't get nobody to pull the trigger.

- What?
- Go figure.

I'm telling you, dawg,
nigga's ain't the same no more.

All they wanna do
is sit around thinking.

- Say what?
- Thinking!

Thinking?

Thinking bout what? Pussy?

- Nah, bro.
- You thinking about pussy?

Purse first, ass last motherfucker!

Fuck these, hoes down,
whatever happened to that?

No, about this gang life.

What? Please don't. Look here.

We sees them like fat back baby,
top dawg since way back.

Come correct with this shit now.
What the fuck is going on?

Cyclops, you my man, 50 grand,
long and strong.

But I'm telling you they ain't wrong.

These niggas be shaking like
they having a seizure in a dice game.

They minds is racing.
And I got a baby on the way!

I wanna see my shorty grow up,
and not crying over my open grave.

- You getting soft...
- Think I got soft?

Think 'bout all the niggas we lost!

They told me it was gonna be rough
when I got out of the joint.

But I ain't know it was
gonna be like this.

What about the war wounds, baby?
The war wounds mean nothing?

Yeah, the war wounds
was when it meant something.

So what about your name
in the game, huh?

Our name has got us six feet deep!

Nobody? Nobody? Jah, Rude?

Yardboy... What now, yeah?

What? Bumbaclot ratchet.

Cyclops, you might wanna hear
a word from me.

Break, and listen to me, bro.

You might wanna listen
to your woman, Indigo.

You're not gonna listen?

- Bro, you can at least talk to me.
- Okay. Okay.

- Let's talk eye-to-eye.
- Okay, yeah.

Eye-to-eye patch!

Chastity belt keys up!

Like clockwork, Rasheeda!

Go. Come on.

Go.

Come on, Doc. Get on up there, Doc.
There you go. After you.

You're a pig.

If I didn't miss my boo so much,
I'd slug the shit outta you!

Bitches and hoes, come out to play.

Bitches and hoes, come out to play.

With our keys,

we shall unlock the sacred brotherhood
of male needs.

And seize the means of reproduction!

Those chastity belts are no match
for a manly man's keys.

Time to let that thing breathe.

So pack up this Gloria Steinem act!

And get y'all ass back
in that damn sack.

Take off those chastity belts
and surrender the Armory.

Nobody moves. Nobody gets hurt.

What's up?

That all you got?

Girl, this sex strike scheme
ain't nothing but a wet dream.

You trying to act
all NFL Roger Goodell,

wench please, all you chicks
gonna burn in hell.

Don't worry, if you act polite
and not all saddity,

we just might issue you
some damn pity...

Nah.

See, we don't wanna fight

but you cro-magnon,
can't walk upright.

You're old dudes, you lack insight.

Who're your mommy and daddy?

I gots no mama and daddy.

You ain't got no folks?

Everybody's my folks.

So you never had a pappy
to school you on the female way.

It takes a man to teach a heifer
like you how to behave.

I'm sorry that our effort to reform
has left you unable to perform.

But even before the strike that's what
your penile implants was like.

- Soft.
- Oh, snap.

You trifling little black bitch!

This ain't no joke.

Your old tired dicks just want
a Viagra poke.

Dude, this is about life and death,
about a community that's a wreck.

And you wanna sit here and talk
about how women behave?

Fool, we trying to free these slaves.

Slaves to the madness.
Slaves to this violence.

And what, you just want us to silence.

We gonna make sure these fools
put down these guns.

And stop thinking
that this craziness is fun.

You see we women,

we understand that life is about more
than polishing your knobs.

Saving lives, that's our job.

It's about bringing an end
to this strife,

and giving the hood
the true meaning of life.

What is the true meaning of life?

You don't know?

Old Duke, why don't we go home? Huh?

My mommy's worried
about you and I and the Knights.

Your mommy?

Yeah, yeah, whatever.
Your mommy's on strike too.

Thank you guys. Bye.
Have a good night.

- And don't forget. No peace, no pussy.
- No pussy.

No peace, no pussy.

- Brooklyn, put your guns down!
- Brooklyn, put your guns down!

- Brooklyn, put your guns down!
- Brooklyn, put your guns down!

Brooklyn, put your guns down!

The President called me this morning.

- The President?
- He was very upset.

World leaders are in crisis.

The infrastructures
of their country are collapsing.

The leader of the free world
thinks the entire matter is my fault.

Mr. Mayor. It's not your fault.

That's right because it's your
cock-sucking fault.

The President of the United States
called me a name today...

- No, Mr. Mayor?
- Oh, Yes. Oh, Yes.

The President of the United States
of America

called me a "Motherfucking
sorry ass punk ass bitch."

Oh yes, it seems the First Lady
has taken the oath.

And what's worse, my wife
has taken the oath.

She's a sexy young thing.
Beautiful. Former model/stripper.

- Honey, I'm home!
- I'm in the bedroom!

Imhotep arrives!

- Oh, ahoy, my queen.
- Oh.

Oh. Mr. Mayor baby, I am so hot.

Your honor, my Pharaoh.

I will now take my Chi-Town Cleopatra.

No peace. No pussy.

If I can't have
my wife's pretty bottom,

from your tush I'll find meaning

and you'll be squealing, like you were
in that movie Deliverance.

Give this Lysistrata what she wants.

She wants world peace.

Give her fucking world peace.
You read me. Get the job done.

Chi-Raq! Chi-Raq!

- You know I knew your pops.
- Father's in there.

I'm good.

We need you and the Spartans
to come down to the Armory

and join in the peace talks.

Fuck I care if these lames
ain't getting the ass.

- Ain't my test.
- So Lysistrata is not your woman?

- I ain't fucking wit my rep.
- This is bigger than your fucking rep.

Ain't no such thing.

Father, I always wanted to ask you,

why a white boy like you been doing up
in E-Dub, all these years?

I grew up 8 blocks from St. Sabana.

When I took my vow to be a priest,
it had to be in the streets,

'cause Jesus roll
with the suffering and the poor.

Imagine, no more stray bullets

killing innocent children
like Patti no more.

Bullets ain't got no name. No eyes.

That's right, they're just designed
to take lives.

Like they'll take yours soon, son.

Three places you're gonna end up:

County Morgue, County Hospital
or County Jail.

The people downtown
don't give a fuck about you.

You're in the system. You in jail.
And you won't make bail.

And it's privatized now to capitalize.

No more insurance card,
no more family to feed,

you're hanging from a tree.

You're not even costing them money,
you're making them money.

And nobody's gonna hear your bitching,

'cause this is a new legal form
of lynching.

This all you got, Padre Miguel?

God loves you. I love you.

And I believe in my heart that you
have a higher purpose in this.

I presided over your father's funeral,

that mean anything to you?

That enough for your little
collection basket?

Thank you for the donation.

Towards the 5,000 dollar bounty

leading to the arrest
of Patti's killer.

I'll pray for you. Be safe.

Hey, hey-

Come on. Let's go.

Any chance you can pull your pants up?

Yo, Ly, it's me Chi'.

Come to your senses?

- I gotta proposition.
- Speak.

- A showdown.
- A showdown?

- That's right.
- Who?

- Me and you.
- I'm not going to shoot you.

It's not a death match.
It's a sex match.

First one to surrender loses.

You lose, you end all this.

No charges filed.
You make a public statement

apologizing to all men.
It's over. Done with.

And when I win?

You get what ever it is
you're trying to do.

Pretty damn sure of yourself.

You are cruel.

You're unkind.

I was fine.

Without your love.

And I kinda knew.

I can't unwind.

Now I wanna dance brother Lee.

I'm trying to move.

By your side...

- Contact.
- There he is.

This is better than
the goddamn super bowl.

Oh yeah!

Put him on the griddle,

dice him, slice him, bake him,
stew him on his own caresses.

- Justice.
- I wish.

I pray-

We should all pray.

What it do?

- Sup?
- Been a while.

Three months, 13 days, three hours,

seven minutes and two seconds.

Counting' days, my Bae?

It's how long we women
have been on strike.

See, you still on fleek.

Not playin' meek.

Damn!

You know I got feelings for you.

Feelings for me?

Down to the bone.

Chi, I'm not picking' a bone with you.

I know you miss Daddy Dick Nasty.

Not more than you miss this steamy,
creamy hot butter biscuit.

Hot butter biscuit!

I'm set afire wit' desire.

Bring it out!

- A brass bed!
- That's enemy led.

That's a big ass brass bed
for banging black booty!

What? My wife's bi-racial.

Whoever comes first, loses.

We had some good times.

A few.

Especially in the A.M.

You always liked it in the morning.

Like you liked it at night.

Yeah. Right tight.

I miss you.

- I missed you back.
- You got them bedroom eyes.

Like your man Biggie said,
they "Hypnotize."

Or like your man Tupac said,

"How do you want it?"

Remember our first?
It was in the club.

You was looking too damn good.

I had the chicken and waffles,
you had ribs.

Took you to the crib.

Showed you how I live.

Got you some wine.

Yeah, beautiful time.

You smell good.

I know.

Now what about peace?

Shit!

You're the only peace I need.

Turn them goddamn
muthafuckin' lights out!

Come on, baby. Come. Come for me.

Come for me, baby.

Yeah!

Oh Chi!

Doing it to me.

We gonna win! We gonna win!

- Oh shit!
- Oh shit!

We done, yo.

Cyclops!

That's my man!

- What?
- We done.

- You know we wrong, right?
- Fuck you mean we wrong?

Dead wrong!

I want my woman Indigo more than
I want a dead yo Spartan Purple.

Not getting some cause we out here
acting dumb?

I'd rather my Glock don't cock
than my nuts stay numb!

Lysistrata took no pity,

turned out every gangster in the city.

Global, really...

I asked Cyclops to be here.

You been played for peace!

This 411, listen to your queen, son.

Had time to reevaluate my shit.

And don't think I turned bitch.

But muthafuckas like us in the life,

we too need to strike.

Put some change in our refrain

and stop all of this killing pain.

Thus...

We,
The United Federation of Gangsterism

for The State of Drillinois,

hereby decree,

we cashing in our chips.

We done with all of this dumb shit.

Now we just waiting on you...

So what it be, Chi?

Yeah, yeah, whatever nigga.

Look, I'm over here putting in work.

I got this!

I'm about to win!

We got this!

We got nothing!

Every Fortune 500 Company

has signed The Peace Accord,

ensuring that every person

in the hoods of America

of employment age

is guaranteed a job,

and I don't mean minimum wage either.

New hospitals and mental health
facilities

will be built by The United States
Government.

And finally, there will be a much-
needed trauma center.

On Chicago's South side.

Lysistrata,

this

is what justice looks like.

We will now sign The Peace Accord.

Peace is not the absence of war,

but a new found love for one another.

Your Johnsons brought you
to the table but that truce

is unstable.

We need truth and reconciliation
for the victims,

the ones that live with this
pain of loss

and must deal with
long term human cost.

Chi-Raq...

We are Mothers of the Hood.

All have lost someone to this
senseless war.

There will be no birthdays for them.

No first dates.

No walks down the aisles.

No tomorrows.

Why the fuck y'all
got me on full blast?

Why y'all trying' to put me on
front street?

This is my Pam,

she's ten years old

I don't wanna hear that shit...

Chi, please!

One summer day,

back when we lived in
The Cabrini Green Projects,

Pam was outside...

jumping double dutch
when they started shooting.

She was shot through her left eye

by a stray bullet.

This was over twenty years ago

and children dying from stray bullets

wasn't a common occurrence like it is
today.

Days later a young man
came to my apartment.

He begged my forgiveness,

then he confessed to the police.

Back then,

it was a violation of the gang code

to murder children.

He knew...

He knew

that if he didn't confess
to me and the police

that the gangs

would end his life.

And that man was your father.

Jamel.

Never knew him.

Only heard stories.

He got killed in prison
when I was just a shorty.

He tried to be a good man.

You can be a good man.

Be a good man.

Be a good man...

Be a good man...

Be a good man...

Be a good man...

Be a good man...

I did dirt.

You have something you want to say?

I killed your Baby Patti.

It was an accident.

No!

Pray for me. Please...

What y'all looking at?

Time for you to do the same.

Take the blame. Take the claim.

Take it on the chin
and confess your sin.

Be a man and quit trying to suppress
this pain you in.

Hell of a mess this gang you in.

Sleepless nights!

Too weak to fight,
couldn't reach us to teach us right.

Our crying mothers,
our dying brothers.

D and D,
that's what they want us to be,

Deaf and dumb.

But you see, the only ones we
protecting is the gun.

So run, nigga, run,
I let it run outta me.

Cause I'm finally free from all these
demons.

Finally I'm leaving!
Finally I'm breathing!

So bring the truth! Bring the truth!

Bring the truth, brother! Bring it!

He'll be all right.
Chi-Raq can take care of himself.

That's Demetrius.

That's not Chi-Raq.

As Stevie Wonder sings.

"All In Love ls Fair."

I ain't too sure about that
but for now,

I'll say yeah!

Lysistrata formed an army more
powerful than the Roman Empire.

Burned through the city,

just like that Chicago fire.

So remember,
Queen Prophet, Lysistrata.

And the lessons that she taught you.

The only real security is love, y'all.

Let's all together make Chi-Raq

back into Chicago,

City of the Broad Shoulders.

Peace, two fingers.

Hope it helped -> bozxphd