All language subtitles for Curb.Your.Enthusiasm.S12E10.No.Lessons.Learned.1080p.BluRay.DDP5.1.H.264-BTN_track5_[eng]

♪ ♪

Seat backs up,
fasten your seatbelts.

Let me get your seat back.

This needs to go up.
And fasten your seat belt, sir.

- seat belt?
- Yeah.

Just more government interference.

Next thing you know,
they won't let me have

an abortion on the plane.

Oh, okay. I'm glad I could help.

Um, and, sir, if you just wanna

- close your laptop there.
- Oh, yeah.

- And then if you just wanna turn your phone off. Thanks.
- Sure. Yeah. Okay. Got it.

At this time we
ask you to fasten all seatbelts

and turn off all electronic devices
as we prepare for takeoff.

[Susie Greene] Hey, Larr.
What's up with Lewis?

I thought he was coming to
Atlanta with us for the trial.

Oh, no.
He left two days earlier.

- So he's there now?
- [Larry David] Yeah.

He went out with this
woman 30 years ago.

They broke up.
She lives in Atlanta now,

so he's gonna see her.

- Rekindling?
- Rekindling.

I hope it works out for him.

Oh, yeah.
I'm sure it's gonna work out.

Larry, when we get in the air,

I'm gonna watch your
little show Seinfeld.

- Never seen it.
- Oh, yeah? It's about time.

I'm gonna watch that shit.
I'll tell you how it is.

I'm not really interested
in your opinion.

- What do you mean?
- I don't consider you a person.

We'll see.

- Excuse me, sir?
- Oh.

Someone let me know that
your phone is still on.

We need to put that on airplane
mode or stow it away.

Who would do something like that?

I'm not gonna disclose that.
And your seat belt's off.

- But why won't you tell me?
- Why would I tell you?

Because I'd like to know

if there's a squealer on this plane.

I'd like to know who it is.

I'm not comfortable
flying with a squealer.

Sir, you're not comfortable
with a squealer

yet you're asking me to squeal?

That's a different kind of squealing.

It seems very hypocritical.

I could see on its face that

- it does seem that way.
- Okay.

But if you examine it, it's really not.

I'm not gonna squeal on
the squealer, okay?

- And let's keep that phone off.
- Okay. Sure. Yeah.

- Thank you. Good job. Thank you.
- [Larry] I got it. Yeah.

Okay.

We apologize for the
delay. We are next in line for takeoff.

Flight attendants,
prepare for departure.

Sir? Sir, we need you to buckle up.

- Huh? What? Huh?
- We need you to buckle up.

- Oh, yeah. No, no. I was just-- Yeah.
- I know what you were doing.

- Okay. Just gonna stay seated. Okay?
- [Larry] Okay.

Hey, you told her that
I was on the phone?

- How dare you accuse me of squealing?
- Huh? Just asking.

I'm schlepping all the
way to fuckin' Atlanta

to support you, on my
anniversary, no less.

It still doesn't mean you
couldn't have done it,

- even if you are coming to support me.
- Oh, please.

I have better things to
do than squeal on you.

Well, it's about plane safety.
I'm sure you're interested in that.

I don't give a shit.

You tell her about my phone?
Was that you?

- You think I did that shit?
- Everyone's a suspect.

- You think I'm a fuckin' snitch?
- I don't think you're above it.

- Oh. It's like that?
- Yeah. It's like that.

Why would I draw attention

when I got my own fucking phone on?

- Your phone's on?
- Fuck yeah, my phone is on.

- His phone's on.
- His phone, sir?

- Check it out. Check it out.
- Come on. Really?

Look at his phone.
Look at his phone.

You're squealing on someone now?

Yeah, he's endangering the rest
of the passengers. He is.

Okay. Okay.
Look, it came back on by itself.

- Please turn that off.
- No. He left-- he left it on.

And is your phone now off?

Yes.

Show her. Show your phone.
Show it to her.

Oh, my God. Oh.

- I thought I turned it off.
- That's on.

Can you turn that onto airplane mode?

- Sure. Yeah.
- Thank you so much.

[Jeff Greene whispers] Larry. Larry.

Yeah?

This guy back here.

What?

Oh, it-- it flipped on.

Why would you do that to me?

Passenger safety.

You're dealing with three very
disturbed individuals here.

Thank you. Everyone, the
plane is taxiing, okay?

I need your phones to be off or stowed

and seatbelts fastened.

- Okay.
- Okay.

♪ ♪

- That's bullshit.
- That's some bullshit.

That's that bullshit.

[Leon Black] I watched a few, uh,

Seinfeld episodes on the plane and shit.

You never told me it
was a show about weekly ass.

It's not a show about weekly ass.

Jerry just constantly
got ass every week.

You know what I thought it
was from the beginning?

I said, "This ain't a
fucking, uh, TV show."

"This is more of a fuck documentary."

That's what it felt like.

Yeah, man. And how do you
fuck that much, man?

It's like you need-- you
need, like, extra dicks.

Like-- Like you got your own dick,

but then you gotta have a backup dick.

A dick should be interchangeable.

Yeah. Like a pair of glasses.

- It should be like a pair of glasses.
- Yeah!

You could put one on in the morning.

Yeah. Quick, put that motherfucker on.

That way, you ain't wearing
out your original dick.

Like when a lady say, "Oh, more, more."

"Oh, you want more?

Oh, I-- I'm-- I'mma take my other dick

"out my back pocket."

- See that?
- Right.

[Larry] Oh. Oh. There's our exit.

[Larry] Hey, she's not--
She won't let me in.

- Hey, let me in. Let me in!
- ♪ ♪

[Leon] Can we get over?

Hey! Can we get in?
Hey! What's wrong with you?

[Leon] We're trying to get in!

[Larry] She's speeding up!

[Leon] We wanna get off the highway!

Are you kidding me?
What is with this woman?

Won't let us in!

Oh, shit!

Fuck you too!

[Larry] What?
I just wanna get in!

What kind of person does
something like that?

Fuck you!

♪ ♪

- [Leon laughs] Appreciate it.
- Thank you.

Whoo!

Mr. David, pulling for you, man.

- Appreciate it. Thank you.
- You got it, brother.

Look at you, man.

Most popular White man
in America right now.

You don't have to buy a pack of Kools

for the rest of your life.

- Excellent.
- I'll be back.

Oh, my gosh.

Preston, come here.

- I am so sorry, sir. No--
- Hey that's fine.

- Here you go.
- Thank you.

Okay. Preston, what do we
say when we hurt somebody?

It-- it's okay.
It didn't hurt me at all.

No, no, no.
Just one more second. No, no.

- Come on. We just talked about this.
- Yeah. Yeah.

- Okay? We say I'm... s...
- [Larry] Okay, I-- I--

Uh...

- Sorry. Sorry. Sorry.
- [Preston and mother] I'm...

Please don't help him out.
I want him to learn this. Okay?

- All right. We're good. Thank you.
- No, no, no. We're not done yet.

We're gonna learn this lesson here,

'cause this is a really
important lesson.

Hey, hey. We don't have
to learn the lesson,

but I'll tell you what.

If you want me to participate
in this lesson...

- Yeah.
- Okay. Here's my two cents.

Okay. Great. Listen to the man.

I'm 76 years old and I have
never learned a lesson

in my entire life.

Oh-ho!

- Do you think that's helping?
- I do.

That's who we don't wanna be
like, okay? Come on. Let's go.

[Mika Brzezinski] The trial
of the State of Georgia

versus Larry David is underway...

- [Larry] You're kidding me.
- ...with jury selection beginning tomorrow.

Could you do me a favor?
Could you put on ESPN please?

Thank you.

So why don't you wanna come with us?

We're going to Auntie Rae's restaurant.

- It's supposed to be great.
- I know. Send her my love.

But I'm here to see, you know, Cynthia.

We're getting along great.

In bed, everything is cool.

- We're still great lovers.
- Ugh.

[Richard Lewis] What are you--
Why are you annoyed?

- You can't-- Why can't you--
- [Susie] That's TMI.

- We don't wanna hear that.
- Why? What is--

'Cause it's a--
It's a picture of you, uh...

- No, no!
- You don't have to picture me. Picture her!

[Larry] We don't wanna picture that.

- [Richard] Why can't I--
- No. Please, no.

I'd rather picture my parents
naked than you naked.

- [Jeff] Don't mention intercourse anymore.
- Really.

A little bit nauseous.

- Oh, hey.
- Hey, what's up?

Hey, man.

- [Leon] Scotch.
- So you guys--

It sounds like you were,
like, madly in love.

- We were deeply in love.
- Wow.

In fact, so much in love that
when I broke up with her,

- she attempted suicide.
- Ooh.

- Really?
- What?

You're telling me that
if she can't have you,

- she'd rather be dead?
- I guess so.

[Larry] You know, sometimes when
you break up with someone,

to get pity, they say
they attempted suicide

so the person will go back with them.

- It's manipulative.
- [Larry] It's manipulative. Yeah.

Wait a minute. You're doubting
her suicide attempt?

You think you're suicide material?

- Yeah, yeah. Absolutely.
- Really?

- Richard.
- [Richard] Hi, beautiful.

- Hi.
- Good to see you, baby.

- Good to see you, too.
- This must be Cynthia.

- It sure is.
- Yes.

- Hi.
- Hi. Susie.

- Susie, nice to meet you.
- My husband, Jeff.

- [Cynthia] Hi, Jeff.
- [Jeff] Pleasure.

- [Leon] Hey.
- [Cynthia] It's a pleasure to meet you.

[Susie] And Larry. You know Larry.

- It's her.
- Yeah.

Yeah, Larry's over here.
Big shot Larry on the news.

- [Cynthia] Larry. Yes.
- Hello.

- [Richard] And his friend Leon.
- Hi. Yeah.

- Hey, how you doin'?
- [Cynthia] I'm good. How are you?

Nice to meet you.

I think we met earlier today, actually.

On I-85.
I was trying to get over

- to the exit.
- [Leon chuckles] Yeah.

And uh, you wouldn't--
you wouldn't let me in.

What-- I don't think I--
Doesn't sound like me.

- Do you have a blue Mercedes?
- I do.

- Huh.
- [Cynthia] But it wasn't me.

I wasn't even on I-85 today.
So you just--

You weren't on I-85 today?

I was not on I-85 today.

You know, this is exciting to
hear this Highway Patrol story,

but we're gonna go eat dinner
and have some time...

♪
♪ -That's right. Enjoy dinner.

- Say hello to Auntie Rae.
- Enjoy your evening. It was very nice to meet you.

♪ ♪ -Thanks
for everything. Both of you.

All right, guys. We gotta go.
We have a reservation.

I know the Highway Patrol theme.
I was singing it.

- [Jeff] Go.
- ♪ ♪

[Susie] That's wonderful, Larr.

If you need anything else, let me know.

- Thank you.
- You're welcome.

- [Cheryl David] Hi, guys.
- Hello, Cheryl.

- [Cheryl] How's it going?
- ♪ ♪

- You just got here?
- [Cheryl] Yeah.

[Susie] Wanna come to dinner with us?

We're going to Auntie Rae's.
It's gonna be delicious.

- Oh. No I'm waiting for Ted.
- Oh.

He's finishing up an interview

because he's protesting tomorrow.

- Oh, okay.
- On your behalf.

No, he's protesting on his behalf.

He's not gonna stand by and
let people be mistreated.

He's not gonna stand by off camera

and let people be mistreated.

Okay. Anyway, we're gonna
go to dinner after.

Do you know of any good
places around here?

Oh, oh. The Mexican place.

Oh, that place is good,
La Conde.

No, no.
She doesn't like Mexican food.

- [Susie] No?
- [Larry] No.

[Susie] Well, you go to the left and
there's like a million restaurants.

- We better go, guys, because you know Auntie Rae.
- All right. Let's go.

You cannot be late for Auntie Rae.

- See you later, Cher.
- Okay. Yeah. Hey. Excuse me.

Why would you say that?

Huh? Say what?

That I don't like...
...Mexican food.

Well, you don't like
Mexican food.

Don't say it in front of people.

- I told you that in confidence.
- What? Confidence?

I don't know what your
problem with it is.

Because it's personal to me.

- No, that's not personal.
- It is.

Telling people what sexual
positions you like,

that would be personal.

- Just keep it to yourself.
- You don't like funnel cake.

Is it okay if I tell people that?

- Yes.
- You didn't like the remake

of The Fugitive with Harrison Ford.

- Can I tell people that?
- Yes.

Okay.

- I won't tell anybody else...
- [Cheryl] Thank you.

...that you
don't like Mexican food.

Thank you.

- Are you okay?
- I am.

- I'm not so sure.
- Okay.

♪ ♪

[Larry] She won't let us in.
She sped up.

And no doubt that it was her.
Was it not?

- It was her.
- Huh? She gave us the finger.

We gave her the finger.
Terrible, terrible person.

You know what? I'm--
I'm gonna say something to him.

Oh, don't tell--
Larry, don't be a Buttinski

and start telling Richard.

Let him have his illusions,
whatever they are.

You never learn your lesson.

- I don't learn my lesson?
- No, you do not.

When have you ever learned a lesson?

Okay, I'll tell you when. Okay.

When I was 19 years old,
I was in a bar. I had a drink.

And I looked at the bartender
and I said to him,

"Hey, Captain,
I'll have another,"

and he gave me like the dirtiest look.

And I've never called
anybody captain since.

Why would you call him captain?

What do you mean why? You've
never called anybody captain?

Not captain, but I did call
a motherfucker chief,

and then realized he was
a real Indian and shit.

All right. We've got four
Rae's Special Salads.

- Here you go.
- Whoo!

- [Susie] Thank you.
- Oh, I also brought y'all

some extra salad dressing, because
y'all are gonna love it.

- Hoowee!
- Y'all need anything else?

I think we're good.
Thank you very much.

- All right.
- [Leon] Good. Thank you.

- Oh, my God.
- You're welcome.

Oh, my God.
This is so delicious.

What is in this that's so good?

- [Leon] It's great.
- This is the best dressing I've ever had.

It's really good.
I agree with you.

Oh, my God.
If I had this recipe,

I would make salads every day,
I'd be losing weight like crazy.

- [Larry] Mm, really good.
- Auntie Rae!

- Hey!
- [Leon] Hey!

I hope y'all having a good time.

- Oh, yeah.
- Let me tell you something, Auntie Rae,

this is the best salad dressing
I've ever had in my life.

I'm happy that you like it, baby.

And I would love to be able
to make it back in LA.

So what's the deal?
What's in it?

Well, you know, baby,
I'm glad you're enjoying it,

but that's one recipe that
they can't pull out of me.

- Oh, come on.
- [Auntie Rae] No.

- Even for you, baby, I don't do.
- [Susie] Oh, damn.

Mm-mm.
That's just the way it is.

Mic drop!

So, I'll see y'all in a
little bit, all right?

[Susie] What is in this?
It's so fucking good.

♪ ♪

[Earl Mack] Well, well, well.

I feel like I won the
jury lottery today.

I look around here and I see
nothing but good people.

I can envision having y'all
over on a Sunday after church

for a little barbecue sometime.

Earl Mack. He's good.
He's really good.

But the circumstances today
call for this question.

Who here could see themselves
stealing a loaf of bread

in order to feed a hungry stranger?

Yeah?

I ask they're all dismissed for cause.

Dismissed.

Damn it.

- I wanted some of those jurors.
- Yeah. No, she was good.

[Judge Whittaker] Defense, you're up.

- Thank you, Judge.
- Oh, wait. I have some thoughts.

What?

- ♪ ♪
- [Larry] All right.

That guy's got a string tie him.
Let's get rid of him.

No liberal would be caught
dead in a string tie.

Juror number 20, thank you.

Dismissed.

Not loving 22. Big hair.

Shades of Kellyanne Conway.
No good.

Juror 22, dismissed.

- [Larry] Forty. That's a Fox watcher.
- Dismissed.

Twenty-three.

You see that comb over?
He's a self-loathing bald man!

He hates himself and he
hates other bald men.

- He's gotta go.
- Okay.

Juror 23, dismissed.

♪ ♪

Uh, members of the jury,

as you know, there's lots of
publicity around this case.

As you see the cameras outside,
there's intense media scrutiny.

So we're gonna have to sequester you.

I know, I know.

We'll give you a nice hotel,
try to make you comfortable.

Oh, sequestering. That's awful.

No watching TV, no
listening to the radio...

I would hate to be cooped up like that.

I don't think I could take it, you know?

And I'll bet a lot of
them cheat on it too.

There's probably a bad
sequesterer among them.

- Don't you think?
- Larry I wouldn't worry about the jury.

You're the defendant.

And if you get convicted,
you'll be a felon.

♪ ♪

Dragnet.

Tomorrow, the lawyers will
give their opening arguments.

Court adjourned.

It is day one of the
trial of Larry David,

the Seinfeld co-creator
who's run afoul...

- Is that for Larry?
- ...of the new Georgia voting law

that he views as partisan, draconian,

- and unconstitutional.
- Thank you very much.

How this plays out could
have major ramifications

for the next election.

- Keep it close.
- Yes, ma'am.

Thank you.

- Hi.
- Hi, Larry.

You got that blue Mercedes, huh?

- Yeah. Nice car.
- [Larry] Oh, very nice.

That's the exact model of the car

that wouldn't let me into the lane.

- That's right. I remember...
- And a woman was driving.

- Huh!
- But it wasn't me.

- What a crazy coincidence.
- [Cynthia] Yeah.

So, um, Richard told me

that you once contemplated, uh,

dare I say, attempted suicide?

Richard told you that?

[Larry] Yes. Yes.
We're very close.

I tell him everything.
He tells me everything. Yeah.

Yes, I did, Larry.

Why did you do it?

Oh, it was the whole... the breakup?

It was a very emotional time for me.

- I was...
- [Larry] Hmm.

...very much in love with him

- and--
- Him?

- You're Richard's friend?
- Yeah.

And you don't believe anyone
could be in love with him?

No.

Have you ever known love, Larry?

Have you ever known the
loss of a great love?

[Larry] Oh, I've known
love and I've known loss.

2004, Yankees lost the last four
games to the hated Red Sox.

Devastated for weeks.

Felt like killing myself, actually.

Different kind of love, Larry.

And in 1994, of course, when
the Rangers won the Cup.

Come on. Doesn't get
any better than that.

When Messier lofted that trophy,

I thought my heart was gonna burst.

Larry, I was in love with
Richard. I made a choice.

I'm-- I-- I was emotionally distraught.

And, yes, I did attempt suicide.

How did you do it?

I think you're the first person

who has ever asked me
that question, Larry.

- Really?
- So inappropriate.

You know, you're right.
It would be inappropriate,

if in fact the person
actually attempted suicide.

Oh, so you're saying you don't
believe I attempted suicide?

- How'd you do it?
- I don't remember.

- It was long time ago.
- You don't remember?

Pills, okay?

What kind of pills?

Pink pills.

- Are you sure?
- Yeah, I'm sure.

♪ ♪

Okay.

Tell Richard I'll be in the car.

Hey, what are you doing sitting
with your back to the door?

Because of my fans.
They just swarm all over me.

Really? You're kind of like a
Beatle in a way, aren't you?

- Can you spread that around?
- [Larry] Yeah.

Hey, Cynthia, she's waiting
in the car for you.

What do you mean? No, she's
gonna meet me in here.

No, no. I had a little...
I had a little thing with her.

What do you mean?

You know, I asked her about
the, uh, the suicide.

[Richard] Oh, Jesus Christ.

The woman tried to hang herself.

- Oh, she did?
- Yes.

Well, isn't that curious.

'Cause she told me she took pills.

Well, what's the difference,
pills, hanging?

What's the difference?
What's the difference?

You think somebody would remember

how they tried to kill themselves.

Why are you doing this to me again?

Ruining my potential wives,

ruining my chance to have children.

- Jeez. Yeah. What?
- I want family.

- How are you gonna do that?
- We'll adopt.

What are you gonna adopt, a 40-year-old?

Yeah. A doctor.

- [Larry laughing] A doctor?
- A doctor or a lawyer.

Good. Good idea.

- Why not?
- Yeah. Why not?

Well, you better go out.
She's waiting in the car.

You better go out.

Oh, God.

♪ ♪

Okay. You ready?

No.

Justice for Larry!

Stop suppressing the vote!

Stop suppressing the vote!

Larry, care to comment on the trial?

- Can you hear the crowd? Yeah.
- Yes.

Any comment? Larry.

Stop suppressing the vote.

Stop voter suppression!

Stop-- Hold on.
Stop suppressing the vote.

Stop voter suppression!

- What are you doing?
- What do you mean what am I doing?

What are you doing?

- I can't sit this one out, Larry.
- [Larry] Oh, really?

Election Integrity Act?
It's bullshit.

They're stealing votes.

Yeah. You're stealing the spotlight.

By the way, why are you
telling everybody

that Cheryl doesn't like Mexican food?

Telling everybody?
What, are you kidding?

I told one person, and so what?

It's not your story to tell, Larry.

There's no story.
It's not a story.

- What's the shame in not liking Mexican food?
- Just keep--

- Keep your voice down.
- [Larry] Why is that bad?

Larry, we gotta go. We gotta go.

- [Ted] Good luck in there.
- [Larry] Yeah.

Hi, Mr. Danson.

♪ ♪

- Stop suppressing the vote.
- Stop voter suppression!

- Earl.
- Morning, Counsel.

Captain.

Oh, my God.
Will you look at this?

No coasters.

No coasters.

They want you to respect the law,

but the law doesn't respect wood.

You see the irony there?

Hey.

[Larry] Oh, hey.

All rise. The honorable
Judge Whittaker presiding.

Take your seats.

Ready for your opening statements?

I am, Your Honor.

Counselor, you may proceed.

My grandfather...

told me we are a country of laws.

That's all we are.

You may not like the
Election Integrity Act,

but that's not the point.

Larry David broke the law.

He's gonna admit that to you

and I'm gonna bring up
a number of witnesses

who are gonna show you a pattern.

It's not a very nice pattern.

Because Larry David
doesn't respect the law.

He lives outside.

Unrestrained by the
guardrails of human decency.

If we lived by Larry David's code,

you know what we'd have?

Anarchy.
Who'd like anarchy here?

He'd love it.

Because that man wants
to burn it all down.

I don't know
where he gets that from.

[Earl] Now, we have to dig
deep and ask ourselves today

whether or not this man
deserves the right

to walk freely among good,
decent, respectable people

like you and me.

Thank you, Counselor.

Larry, you fucked!

Shut the fuck up.

- This motherfucker's good.
- Ms. Sanders?

Yes, Judge.

Did Larry David break the law?
Of course, he did.

And yes, Larry is the one
who's on trial here.

But Larry David is not the
one who should be on trial.

It is this unconscionable,

inhumane law that should be on trial.

You can't give another human being water

on a hot day?

The district attorney will
say he broke the law.

Case closed. Simple as that.

But what if the law
said that Black people

have to ride in the back of the bus

or that Jewish people have to
wear stars on their clothes?

We know this law is wrong.

Its only purpose is to scare
people off from voting.

[Sibby Sanders] It is
an insult to democracy

and it goes against everything
the Bible tells us,

what our parents taught us.

Ask yourself this...

what would Jesus do

if he saw a line of people
sweltering in the heat,

crying out for water?

Would you convict Jesus?

[Sibby] I think we all
know the answer to that.

And if you wouldn't convict Jesus...

[Larry] Ha!

...then you can't convict Larry.

[Sibby] Thank you.

Thank you, Ms. Sanders.

- [Larry] Hey.
- We got 'em.

- Good job.
- ♪ ♪

Is the state ready
to call its first witness?

The state calls Joe Boccabella.

- Who's Joe Boccabella?
- ♪ ♪

[Larry] Oh, my God.

That's not Joe Boccabella.
That's Mocha Joe.

Mr. Boccabella,
I understand at one point,

you were in the coffee business?

Yes, I was.
It was called Mocha Joe's.

Maybe you heard of it.

Ever have a problem with anybody?

Not really. Normal stuff.

Until one day
Larry David came in.

[Earl] Could you tell us what happened?

He started complaining,

my scones were like muffins, too soft...

Yeah. They were soft.

...my tables were wobbly, and
that my coffee was cold,

which it was not.

- Objection, Your Honor. Relevance.
- No. Which it was. It was cold.

- Goes to motivation, Your Honor.
- I'll allow it.

[Earl] And it ended there?

I wish. He came back in and
he said he was opening up

- what he called The Spite Store.
- Oh, here we go.

[Joe Boccabella] A coffee
shop, right next door

to my store, Mocha Joe's.

He was trying to put me out of business.

It got even worse.

I got a call in the middle of the night

that Mocha Joe's was on fire.

♪ ♪
- [Joe] And when I got there, he was standing there,

watching my beans burn.

What did you do?

- He burned my beans!
- I didn't burn your beans!

You burned my beans.

Joey Funkhouser started that fire

with his big new penis.

Mr. David, shut your mouth

or I'll have my bailiff do it for you.

What's he gonna do?
Hit me?

- What are you gonna do?
- ♪ ♪

[Earl] State would like to call
Matsue Takahashi.

Mr. Takahashi, could you
please tell the jury

what your occupation is?

I own the golf club.

How were Larry David's interactions

- with the other members?
- Oh, he's always disgruntled.

And, also, he never say
fore when he hit the ball.

One time, he hit a member in the back

with a golf ball.

- Oh, my God!
- Hey, what the fuck?

And I understand there was an incident

involving some wildlife at the club?

Oh, yes.

[Matsue Takahashi] He killed...

- Hey! Hey! Hey!
- ...my beautiful black swan, Yoko.

Hey!

[Larry] The swan attacked me!

It was kill or be killed.

- You're a murderer. Murderer!
- [Larry] It was self-defense.

Order!

- ♪ ♪
- [Earl] The state is honored

to call Lieutenant Colonel
Alexander Vindman.

Lieutenant Colonel Vindman,
I understand you have

a long history of uncovering corruption.

I reported
President Donald Trump

when he was sitting president
and he attempted to extort,

in a quid pro quo,
President Zelenskyy,

who's now fighting a war against Russia,

and President Trump ended
up being impeached.

I continue to expose corruption
wherever I find it,

and I will not tolerate corruption

from Trump, Putin, or Larry David.

Come on.

Trump, Putin, and Larry David?

That's an unusual combination.

I overheard Larry David
attempting to bribe

a Santa Monica city councilwoman.

It was a perfect call.

A perfect call.

♪ ♪

[Larry] Vindman, Takahashi,

they fly all the way
out here to do that?

They fly to Atlanta?

I don't know.
What are we gonna do?

What am I gonna do?
This is looking bad.

Well, if I think of something,
I'll let you know.

I gotta get going.

Tomorrow's my anniversary

and Susie made these big
dinner plans for us tonight,

fancy restaurant.

And you know what?
I gotta get her a gift.

I don't even know what
the fuck to get her.

Another one? You just got
her a birthday gift.

I know. Yes.

She loved that--
She loved that salad dressing.

Couldn't get the recipe from Auntie Rae.

- That'd be a good gift.
- Yeah. That's a great gift.

I know, but she's not gonna give it out.

She said no.

I'm gonna give it a little bit of a try.

- [Larry] What are you talking about?
- Watch a man in action.

Hey, there. It's Rae's.
How may I help you?

My name is Journey Gunderson.

My wife is in the hospital

because of the dressing on your salad.

Oh, my goodness.
Oh, my goodness.

There are numerous doctors

and we need to know
what's in that dressing.

Mr. Gunderson, we never
give that recipe out, sir.

You need to let us know.

Oh that's her.
She's in so much pain.

Ah!
Journey!

[Jeff] The doctors need to know
the specific ingredients.

- [Larry over phone] Journey!
- I'm-- I'm-- I'm--

I'm sorry. Mr. McGunderman,
is that your wife?

[Jeff] That was Karen Gunderson.

She's all catawampus.

- I'm sorry. All kind of what?
- [Jeff] catawampus.

Wampus? What the heck is Wampus,
Mr. Gurney Manunderson?

[Auntie Rae] Hang in there.

Uh, Karen Gunderson,

honey, me and your husband,
Gurney Germerny,

we gon' get you better, baby.

Now, listen here.
It's a tablespoon of vinegar.

One tablespoon vinegar.

And I use, yeah, three teaspoons

- of the olive oil.
- Yeah.

[Auntie Rae] And some clove garlic.

And I use a half a teaspoon of
Dijon mustard, a dollop...

- ♪ ♪
- [Susie] What is this?

- Auntie Rae's salad dressing.
- [Larry mockingly] Auntie Rae's salad dressing.

Aw, that is so thoughtful.
How'd you get this?

Love finds a way.

Oh, baby doll.

But, wait. There's more.

- More? More?
- [Jeff] Oh, more.

Yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
Happy anniversary.

- What is this?
- What? What-- What is this?

It's a recipe.

- Oh, the recipe!
- [Susie] It's the recipe for the salad dressing.

- You got the recipe.
- [Susie] Oh, my God.

- How did you get the fucking recipe?
- It's the recipe.

This is the best gift you've ever given.

Better than any kind of poem or sonnet.

You're the best husband
in the whole world.

What about this young man

- from Chicago, huh?
- Mm-hmm. Oh, I love this.

Look at this.

- Oh. Hi, Leon.
- [Larry] Oh, boy. Look who's here.

- [Leon] You know what it is.
- Yeah, what?

That motherfucking Seinfeld, man.

I've been catching up on that shit.

Binge watching that bullshit, man.

Oh, yeah? What do you--
What do you think?

Man, this goddamn Kramer,
man, he's too much, man.

Walk into your fucking house
unannounced and shit.

- Yeah.
- You might as well take off the fucking door

and put a fucking saloon
door on that bitch.

[Leon] You know what I'm saying?

This motherfucker just
walking in when he want to.

So what's gonna happen today?

Is it gonna be better than yesterday?

'Cause yesterday was a disaster.

- I mean, a disaster.
- Yeah.

I think this judge really
has it in for me.

He really does.

- What's it gonna be?
- I don't know.

Anything you could do about it?
What? What?

- I don't know.
- You know what you need?

- Sympathy.
- Oh, really?

Let me tell you a little story
about Horsecock Williams.

This motherfucker's always in trouble.

Always in fucking court.

Know what he fucking does?

He'll come in the courtroom
in a wheelchair.

And he rolls in there slow and
fucking shaking and shit.

Everybody's like, "Oh,
my God. That poor man."

The judge is touched.
The bailiff is touched.

Sketch artist is fucking bawling so bad

that the sketch is blurry.

And that motherfucker
wins every fucking time.

This motherfucker wins.

He is a sympathy snatcher.

Wow.

[Leon] Horsecock is fucking amazing.

He had an idea about getting
wheelchair hookers,

put 'em out on the street and
shit. You know what I mean?

Have you ever had sex with a woman
in a wheelchair? 'Cause I have.

Have you ever tapped
some ass on crutches?

You ever crutch fuck?

That's like fucking an animal

'cause the crutches are
an extra set of legs.

Shit. Break that ass off, huh?

[Leon] Wheelchair hookers,

there's a market for
every fucking thing.

♪ ♪

[Leon] He always had
great ideas and shit.

Motherfucker's innovative.
Horsecock is fucking amazing.

Day two of the trial is underway
and it's up to the jury

to decide what kind of
man Larry David is.

We're expecting even more
witnesses from the prosecution.

Free Larry. Free Larry.

Jurors, I wanna remind you

not to discuss this case with anyone

until deliberations begin.

You'll have an opportunity
to deliberate--

Get your fucking hands off me.

I got it. I got it.
I'm fine. I'm not helpless.

Oh, my God. Look at this.
She came, she came.

- Oh, you're here.
- [Cheryl] What is going on?

- [Larry] Honey. You came.
- Yeah.

- I'm here.
- Look, look, look, look.

Honey's here.

Why didn't you tell me? I would've
carried you up the steps.

- It's fine. It's fine.
- Oh.

Oh, oh, oh.

Such a brave girl.
Oh, my God, what a surprise.

Who is that?

Just go with it.

Are you through?
May we continue?

I'm sorry, Your Honor.
My sweetheart just arrived.

She got hit by a bus a few months ago

and she was lying on the ground,
I rushed over.

I gave her mouth-to-mouth resuscitation.

And I carried her to my car.
Not that easy.

Took her to the hospital,
we fell in love

and I moved to Pacoima to be with her.

And look at her, the poor thing.

I saved her life.
Tell-- Tell him I saved--

You just told him.

- Yeah, we're in love.
- [Larry] Yeah.

He's great.
He's a... He's a wonderful man.

And the... the animals...

- Oh, oh! Oh.
- [Larry] Oh, yeah.

- He works in an animal shelter.
- The animal shelter. Yeah, yeah.

- And the kids...
- And, uh-- Oh, the disable--

- He works with disabled kids.
- [Larry] Disabled kids.

Oh, he walks in, "Larry's here!"

They'd all jump up if they could jump.

All right, enough. Uh, please.

Uh, prosecution, you got any
more witnesses to call?

Yes. We would like to call, uh,

witness Rachel Heineman, please.

♪ ♪

[Earl] Could you please state
your name for the record?

Rachel Raheli Shuli
Hamda Sarala Heineman.

And how do you know the defendant?

I was unfortunate enough to be
on a ski lift with the accused.

And for some reason,

HaShem decided to stop the ski lift

as shkiyat hachamah, that's sundown

was approaching, and as a woman,

I'm not allowed to be with
a man after sundown.

- ♪ ♪
- [Rachel] So I informed him...

Somebody's gonna have to jump.

- To which he said...
- What, are you fucking nuts?

[Rachel] And so I was forced...

...to jump 45 feet.

I broke both my knees, my ankles.

I put together a little diagram.

I'm still traumatized.

- Yeah.
- ♪ ♪

Larry David pissed on a portrait
of Jesus Christ in my home.

What?

- ♪ ♪
- [Maureen] He tinkled on it.

- He sprayed Jesus.
- Oh!

- [Maureen] And not just a little.
- ♪ ♪

He came to our restaurant.
He screamed.

Larry David is a sad senior

with long balls and mental issues.

You've seen the big piles of
shoes in a Holocaust museum.

What kind of monster takes
some of those shoes

out of there and wears them?

[Irma Kostroski] Who can do that?

What kind of guy is Larry David?

He's the kind of man who carelessly,

maybe even maliciously, had
me drink from his glass

and gave me COVID.

He gave me COVID.

- Bullshit.
- Ruining the biggest night of my

and some of my fans' lives.

And he doesn't give a damn.

And I still can't smell a fucking thing.

- ♪ ♪
- [Earl] State would like to call

- Tara Michaelson.
- Who's that?

- I don't know.
- [Earl] Ms. Michaelson,

how many years of therapy have you had?

I started therapy when I was about nine.

So, um, 21 years.

And is there one particular incident?

When I was about eight years old,

I went with my parents
to a movie premiere.

And right before the movie started,

I went by myself to the
women's restroom.

And I found
Larry standing there.

- Hello.
- Thank you for fixing Judy's hair.

Oh you're welcome.

[Tara Michaelson] He gave me a hug.

Mommy! Mommy!
That bald man's in the bathroom

and there's something hard in his pants.

[Earl] Thank you, Ms. Michaelson.

I believe the prosecution rests,
Your Honor.

The defense will now call
their first witness, please.

Yes, Your Honor,
I'd like to call Rae Black.

♪ ♪

[Leon] That's my auntie right there.

She carries candy in her bra.
If we're all lucky,

we're gonna get some
of that titty-taffy.

I'm so glad she's here.
So far, it's been a disaster.

It was supposed to be so easy.

Now, it's all gone catawampus.

- What was that?
- Ah!

[Cheryl] What is happening?

♪ ♪

[Sibby] Mrs. Black,
Larry David gave you water

on that hot day.

But it's not the first
time he took care of you.

He took you and your family
in after Hurricane Katrina.

Well, his wife did.

But you did live with him
for quite some time.

It's true.

Long enough for him to use
the N-word around me.

He did that shit.

- What?
- And long enough for him

to hug me and have a hard-on,
an erection that he

- was rubbing all up against me.
- We don't need to talk about that.

[Auntie Rae] And the
last time I saw him,

he was carting around
a Black lawn jockey.

- Move to strike, Your Honor.
- No, no, no.

- That's her witness, Your Honor.
- Denied. It's your witness,

you're stuck with the answers she give.

Why is she doing this to you, Larr?

And another thing.

No, no, no.
No further questions.

Thank you, Ms. Sanders.

What the hell?

You sons of bitches. It was you!

I know it was you,
Bernie Bonderman,

and you, Karen Bonderman,

trying to steal my recipe.

- [Auntie Rae] How could you?
- You stole that recipe, Jeff?

No.

- You stole the recipe?
- No, I didn't--

Fuck you, Larry David.

Ms. Black-- -And fuck your
monkey ass-friend...

- Miss--
- ...Bashiba Munderman.

Ms. Black, I will have
order in this court.

You know what, fuck it!

You lying piece of shit, Jeff.

That is the lowest form of
anything I've ever heard.

Stealing a fucking anniversary gift.

Take that recipe, Jeff,

and shove it up your fat fucking ass.

Oh, my God. She's walking.

She's walking!

It's a miracle. It's a--
Look, it's just a miracle.

How did she do it?
I can't even believe it.

- Walking.
- Order.

- She's walking. Oh. Oh.
- Mr. David.

- Mr. David.
- Oh. She's walking.

That's enough, Mr. David.

♪ ♪

Pick this up tomorrow.

This day is over.

[Mika over TV] Massive protests outside
the Atlanta courthouse today,

- including multiple Emmy-winning actor Ted Danson.
- Stop voter suppression!

These are a little tight.

There you go. Freedom to vote.

- Maybe Ted Danson gives a damn about democracy...
- Yeah.

...that's why people love him.

That's why people respect him.
Mika...

- I know.
- That's why the guy's my hero.

- Yeah. He's an amazing actor.
- Oh, I love you, guys.

No, no, don't, don't touch the hair.

What if Ted Danson had given
that woman in the line water,

instead of Larry David?

I think everything would be different, right?

- Larr!
- [Willie Geist on TV] Yeah. Likability, certainly...

- [Larry] Hey, you made it. Oh!
- Look at you. Oh, my God.

- Hey.
- Oh, my God.

It's a bottle of water.
I mean, it's not your fault.

- Exactly. I didn't do anything.
- Pure, decent human being

is all you're trying to be.

- Let that be a lesson to me.
- [Jerry Seinfeld] Right.

So, how are you getting through this?

You're sitting in court all day?

- Yeah.
- Well what do you think about?

- Let me give you a hypothetical.
- Okay.

Suppose you're friends with someone

- who's in the circus.
- Sure.

- [Larry] He knows the bearded lady very well.
- Okay.

And you go to the performance
at the Garden, he says,

"Hey, the bearded lady's
having a little shindig,

- why don't you join us?"
- A little get-together.

You go to the bearded lady's apartment.

- It's a normal apartment.
- Nothing freakish.

- No, nothing freakish at all.
- [Jerry] Yeah.

You wouldn't know you were
in a freak's apartment.

- [Jerry] No.
- Okay.

Now, you see this picture.

- This gorgeous woman.
- Yeah.

And your friend says to you,
"That's the bearded lady."

- She has no beard.
- Clean-shaven bearded lady.

She's quitting the circus.
She's got a big crush on you.

- Really?
- She'd love to go out with you.

- She's gonna start shaving.
- [Jerry] Really?

- But at the party when we're there...
- At the party.

- ...she's got the beard on.
- [Larry] She's got the beard on.

- Rabbinical?
- Very rabbinical.

- Yeah. Yeah.
- Yeah. Wow.

Yeah. Any interest?

- She's sexy.
- [Larry] Everything.

- Charming.
- Got it all.

- Wow.
- The kind of woman

- you used to dream about...
- [Jerry] Yeah.

- ...when you were a teenager.
- [Jerry] Yeah.

- Fly in the ointment, though.
- Yeah.

And this is a big fly, and he's alive.

What's the worst that could happen?

The worst that could happen
is it's a paper napkin...

...and she wipes her mouth,

and, uh, there's some--
part of it snags.

Is there a Fred Flintstone kind of line?

- No, there's no line.
- [Jerry] No line?

No, there's no line.
She gets a good shave.

- Electric or blade?
- Blade. She shaves every day.

But at the end of the day, she's
five o'clock shadow lady.

She'll shave twice a day for you.

What if I happen
to be home at 4:30?

Guess who's on the ledge.

♪ ♪

Today, Larry David will take the stand,

and he will get a chance to explain

his motivations on election day.

And defend himself from the accusations

hurled at him by yesterday's witnesses.

Larry David...

Mr. David has got his
work cut out for him,

the picture that's been painted
by the prosecution so far

is that of a petty,
conniving, and, frankly,

- spiteful man.
- ♪ ♪

[Sibby] And how hot was it that day?

- It was a scorcher.
- Mm.

Even I was sweating, and let
me tell you something,

I don't sweat, it's the craziest thing.

Like I could be playing
basketball in the summer,

I won't sweat.

You know, occasionally for some reason,

I'll sweat during intercourse
sometimes, which is odd.

- You know, all of a sudden, "Oh, I'm sweating!" You know?
- He needs to stop talking.

And how long was the line to vote?

[Larry] It was really long.

All those people having
to wait in the hot sun.

- No trees.
- ♪ ♪

No grass.

And was there any shade?

No shade.

I know I speak for
Ms. Black and all of us

when I say thank you for your actions.

Oh, God bless you.

And may God bless us all.

- Yes. Yes.
- Thank you, Ms. Sanders.

- Prosecution, you got a cross?
- [Earl] Yes, Your Honor.

Proceed.

Let's talk about laws
Mr. David.

Do you ever remember taking anything

that didn't belong to you?

You ever remember stealing anything?

- No. No.
- [Earl] No?

- You don't remember taking flowers...
- No.

- ...from a dead woman's...
- No.

...memorial?

♪ ♪

[Larry] Oh, that? Well...

Do you remember taking a
golf club out of a coffin?

[Larry scoffs] It was my 5-wood.

[Earl] You pried the club
out of a dead man's hand?

[Larry] Okay. So you know when
you get attached to a club,

you don't wanna give it up
even if it's in a coffin?

Well, that was that 5-wood for me.

Did you ever bribe a city councilman?

Do you remember breaking in to the house

of the head of the city council

in order to take a
letter from Mr. Vindman

that incriminated you?

Ladies and gentlemen,
Larry David undermines

our free and fair elections.

He is exactly who the
Election Integrity Act

was built to protect us from.

- Objection, Your Honor.
- Overruled.

- Really?
- Yeah.

Let's go back to the year 2000,

if we could, please.

Larry David, this is from
the Los Angeles Times.

It's an obituary written by you.

Could you read it to
the jury please, sir?

"Devoted sister, beloved cunt."

[Cheryl's father] Huh?

It's a typo. Don't you see?

It's a typo.

The fact is...

...I've heard that she
actually was a bit of a cunt.

But that's still no excuse

to put that in a newspaper.

I have no further questions.

Thank you, Counselor.

- I've talked to Larry about Seinfeld and shit.
- Mm-hmm.

So...

my question is, where the
fuck are the tapes at?

- Tapes?
- Larr-- The tapes.

Larry won't give that shit up.
The tapes.

- What tapes?
- The fuck tapes.

You know what the fuck
I'm talking about.

- No, I don't.
- Every week,

you getting new ass, right?

Every fucking show...

- Mm-hmm.
- ...you meet some new chick.

- Well.
- And I know you fucking.

- You probably fucking people.
- Mm-hmm.

I did. I did. I had 'em all.

- Of course, man.
- Yeah.

- Come on.
- And it's all on tape.

I don't know how you knew.

I figured that shit out, that's why.

Yeah. Yeah.
But they're on laser disc.

- Oh!
- Do you have a player?

- Fuck me, man.
- Yeah, sorry.

- No way to convert that shit to something else?
- Yeah. No.

That's a shame.
It's 13 unbelievable hours.

- What a fucking waste, man.
- Yeah.

I might sell it to Netflix.

[Sibby] But it doesn't change the fact

that this law is unconstitutional.

Yes, Larry David did a
lot of things wrong.

But this time, he did something right.

[Sibby] And now,

you have the opportunity to
do something right too.

Thank you.

- Look at her.
- [Susie] Terrific.

Thank you, Counselor.

Mr. Mack.

- [Earl] Yes, Your Honor.
- Wow. That was great.

I know some of you may
not like this law.

But he broke it.

And this is an incredible opportunity

to put away somebody before
they hurt other good people.

We are just scratching the
surface of the depths

that this monster will go to.

There's a police report that exists

stating that Larry David
would not give candy

- to children on Halloween.
- Trick or treat.

I don't-- I don't think so.

- God, asshole! Fuck you.
- Thanks for nothing, asshole.

He broke into a graveyard
to move his mother's body.

- This is nice.
- Oh, yeah?

[Earl] He brought a sex
offender to a Passover seder.

He ate a dying dog's last meal.

Oh, that is really good.

[Earl] And he fornicated...

...with a blowup doll in broad daylight.

Oh, my God.

I made you a pillow sham.

- [Earl] He taught a child how to make a swastika.
- What the...

[Greg] What was his name again,
Larry?

Hitler?

- Get in the car.
- [Earl] He hired a prostitute

so that he could drive
in the carpool lane.

I had sex with my uncle.

And he pretended to be
an incest survivor...

named Todd.

This man was asked to go to a
dinner and just be cordial

and he couldn't even do that, folks.

He couldn't even be cordial.

Good people, you have
one decision to make.

I trust you'll make the right one.

♪ ♪

Thank you, Mr. Mack.

Jury will now begin their deliberations.

All rise.

Court is adjourned.

How you feeling?

Confident.

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

Jerry. Jerry Seinfeld.

- Oh, my word. Sorry, man.
- Hey, how you doing?

Can I have two seconds
of your time, please?

I can't. I'm having
dinner with my friends.

My name's Michael Fouchay.

I'm actually a legitimate businessman.

- I run Fouchay Enterprises.
- All right.

You might have heard of us.

- We own several businesses.
- I have not, but I like the accent.

- South African?
- Yes.

- Yeah, I like that accent.
- I'm amazed you recognize it.

- Yeah, I do.
- [Michael Fouchay] Thank you.

I mean, I think accents
in general are moronic.

- [Michael] Right.
- Why don't you talk the way we talk?

You're here. You can hear it.

Listen, my brother's having a birthday.

He's turning 40.
I've got a lovely house.

No one ever turned 40 before.
Yeah, go ahead.

You come, you smile, take a few photos,

shake a few hands, just be cordial.

Yeah. Can't do it.

- [Michael] Why not?
- Can't be cordial.

Um... Uh...

- Uh, excuse me. No, I'm sorry.
- Oh. Excuse me. Pardon me.

- No, go ahead. No, I'm so sorry.
- So sorry. No, you go.

- No, go ahead.
- Hey, you know, you look a lot like Joe Pesci.

- Anybody ever tell you that?
- Really?

- Yeah.
- You think I'm fucking funny?

- You think I'm a clown?
- [Jerry] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Am I here to make you fucking laugh?

Yeah, that's what he says in the...

♪ ♪

[Dan Abrams] The jury
has reached a verdict

in the trial of the people
of the state of Georgia

versus Larry David.

It's not about what this man has
done or the poor decisions

he's made in the past, it
is about this heinous

and needlessly cruel law.

♪ ♪

Huh?

- You're here?
- Hey, LD.

Don't worry.
I broke up with Cynthia.

Oh, jeez. Really?
That's too bad.

Yeah, well,
I'm a little worried.

- She bought a gun.
- She's gonna kill herself?

No. You.

That's funny.

It's not a joke.

Hey, man.

I binged all those Seinfeld episodes.

Oh, yeah?

All I got left is the fucking finale.

Wow.

Although, I heard some
terrible things about it.

I heard you fucked it up.

- All rise.
- Good luck today, man.

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,

- have you reached a verdict?
- We have, Your Honor.

♪ ♪

I don't understand, why does the judge

have to peek at it?

Yeah, and I gotta see it, and
then ma-- then you go back.

This makes no sense.

Yeah.
They can't make two copies?

On the charge of violating
the Election Integrity Act,

how do you find the defendant?

We find the defendant guilty.

- What?
- Oh, come on.

- This is a travesty of justice.
- Come on.

Oh, my God.

Mr. David, seems you have a history

of doing the same things
wrong over and over.

And I truly hope this time you
finally learned your lesson.

And to make sure of that,
I'm gonna sentence you

to the maximum the law allows.

One year in prison.

- What? Come on. Seriously?
- [Leon] Larry, look.

When you get there, get
a job at the library.

No, I think the infirmary.

[Jerry] Maybe something in reception.

"Hello, jail. Can I help you?"

Bailiff.

Take Mr. David into custody.

Hey, Larry. Don't worry.

I'm gonna take real, real good
care of that house of ours.

- Oh, my God.
- Bye, Larr.

[Larry] Hey, let me ask you something.

What do you do about,
you know, toothpaste

and shaving cream and Q-tips?

Is-- Is there a store
or is it like a hotel

where they just leave it out for you?

And can I bring my own toilet paper?

Oh, and my phone charger.

Leon, Leon,
I need my phone charger.

- You don't got a charger.
- I loaned it to you.

- I gave it back.
- Bullshit! That's my charger!

♪ ♪

I should probably go do some interviews.

Where should we eat?

♪ ♪

Hey. Look at this.

That happens to me too.

- What do you call that?
- It's a pants tent.

- Pants tent.
- [Larry] Yeah.

I got a five-inch bunch up here.

You know something,

I stopped wearing corduroys
because of that.

Yeah, I'm wearing corduroys now.

Yeah, and women,

they don't know what a pants tent is.

They-- It could lead
to misunderstandings.

They get confused.

Hey.

Somebody's here to see you.

All right, Chuckles.
Let's get you out of here.

- What? Wait.
- [Jerry] Yeah.

What are you-- What are you--
What are you talking about?

It's over.

- It's over?
- You're a free man.

- [Larry] I'm a free man?
- That's right.

- How am I a free man?
- I'll tell you how.

You know that Mexican
restaurant near the hotel?

I go there to get something to eat.

I don't even like Mexican food.

That's okay.
I won't tell anybody.

- What do I care?
- Well, some people care.

- Really?
- [Larry] Yeah.

Anyway, there's this guy
there, looks like Joe Pesci.

So I go up to him, talking to him.

I go you really look like Pesci

- from Goodfellas.
- Yeah.

He goes, "Oh, what am
I, a clown for you?"

I go, "Ah, that's a Pesci line."

- [Larry] Yeah, yeah.
- You know?

- He doesn't like that too much.
- [Larry] Uh-huh.

Anyway, today in the courtroom,
I look in the jury box.

That's that guy. Same guy.

The hair, Pesci.

Yeah, yeah, that's the guy in the jury.

- The juror. I know that guy.
- [Jerry] Yeah.

- The big pompadour. Yeah, yeah.
- [Jerry] With the hair. Yeah, yeah.

He's not supposed to be
in a Mexican restaurant

because he's under sequester.

- He broke his sequester?
- Broke his sequester.

- He's supposed to sequester.
- He's supposed to sequester.

- He's a bad sequesterer.
- You can't not sequester

- when you're supposed to sequester, right?
- You should be sequestering.

Yeah. I tell the judge, judge
calls the restaurant,

they look at the security footage.

Mistrial declared.
Sentence thrown out.

You're done.

How about that, sport fans?

Uh-- I-- Well, you know...
Come on.

- Ah!
- I mean, crazy.

You don't wanna end up like this.

Nobody wants to see it.

Trust me.

Wow.

Breathe the free air, young man.

Yes.

♪ ♪

Oh, my God.

This is how we should've
ended the finale.

Oh, my God, you're right.

How did we not think of that?

Ladies and gentlemen,
we've reached our cruising...

[Cheryl] Wow.

- [Ted] Yeah.
- Try that one.

- You know what?
- Yeah.

Handcuffs look tight on that one.

They do. Did they hurt?

- Uh-uh.
- No?

Montgomery Clift.

- Whoo! Hey.
- Hey, what is that?

- I need it for the light. I need it to read.
- [Larry] The what? I'm--

I'm trying to read.
I can't see. You're blinding me.

Well, I need it to read.
I need--

Why don't you use the overhead light?

Just let her keep the shade up.

I'm trying to watch a
movie, all I see is glare.

It's like I'm watching a
fucking radio right now.

My retinas are burning.

This is bullshit. This is bullshit.

Cheryl and I want it open.

It's a community shade.
She doesn't own that shade.

- Go fuck yourself, Larr.
- We'll take a vote.

Go back to fucking jail, Larry.

- Oh, nice. That's nice.
- I vote with them.

- I vote with them.
- It's not your window.

♪ ♪

♪ ♪