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1
00:00:13,931 --> 00:00:16,517
Okay, I just wanted to take you through
2
00:00:16,642 --> 00:00:18,852
the main points of the
sexual harassment complaint
3
00:00:18,977 --> 00:00:21,021
- from your assistant.
- Right. Right. Right.
4
00:00:21,146 --> 00:00:23,524
The first contention is you
yanked at her clothes.
5
00:00:23,649 --> 00:00:26,109
I yanked at her--
I cleaned my glasses.
6
00:00:26,235 --> 00:00:28,070
- Cleaned your glasses.
- Her shirttail was sticking out.
7
00:00:28,195 --> 00:00:30,113
I cleaned my glasses.
Oh, boy. Oh, boy.
8
00:00:30,239 --> 00:00:32,533
- Send me to the cooler.
- I don't want you to worry about it.
9
00:00:32,658 --> 00:00:34,243
I can handle this.
10
00:00:34,368 --> 00:00:37,871
If she gets anything at all
here, it would be a travesty.
11
00:00:37,996 --> 00:00:40,499
And I would,
I would leave the country.
12
00:00:40,624 --> 00:00:43,001
I don't know where I'd
go, but I would leave.
13
00:00:43,126 --> 00:00:45,671
I hear Canada is a good place, maybe.
14
00:00:45,796 --> 00:00:47,881
- But it's cold.
- I don't recommend moving to Canada.
15
00:00:48,006 --> 00:00:50,926
What about-- what about like a
Pacific island or something?
16
00:00:51,051 --> 00:00:53,887
I want to assure you that
as upsetting as this is,
17
00:00:54,012 --> 00:00:56,890
I think we'll either be
able to make it go away
18
00:00:57,015 --> 00:00:58,892
or come to a reasonable settlement.
19
00:00:59,017 --> 00:01:01,228
- What? Come to a what?
- An amicable arrangement--
20
00:01:01,353 --> 00:01:03,981
A settlement?
A reasonable settlement?
21
00:01:04,106 --> 00:01:07,150
"Millions for defense.
Not one cent for tribute."
22
00:01:07,276 --> 00:01:10,153
That's what we said when the
British were impressing our seamen.
23
00:01:10,279 --> 00:01:12,614
You, you know they tried to
impress our seamen, right?
24
00:01:12,739 --> 00:01:15,534
They'd be on the ship, they'd
yell across at one of our ships.
25
00:01:15,659 --> 00:01:19,871
"Hey, there! We have the best
dental plan in all of Europe.
26
00:01:19,997 --> 00:01:23,917
"Why, look at our bicorn hats
and fancy brass buttons.
27
00:01:24,042 --> 00:01:27,296
How's that, sailors?
Are you impressed by that?"
28
00:01:27,421 --> 00:01:29,131
Anything else we haven't gone over?
29
00:01:29,256 --> 00:01:31,340
- Hmm.
- Okay.
30
00:01:31,465 --> 00:01:34,136
If anything comes to you
after this conversation...
31
00:01:34,261 --> 00:01:36,597
- You'll be the first to know.
- ...you're in your car, you're driving home...
32
00:01:36,722 --> 00:01:37,764
- Yeah.
- ...pick up the phone.
33
00:01:37,889 --> 00:01:39,349
- Really?
- Yeah.
34
00:01:39,474 --> 00:01:42,019
If I do happen to call you,
which I very well could,
35
00:01:42,144 --> 00:01:45,772
does that mean that
I'll be charged for the time?
36
00:01:45,897 --> 00:01:49,860
In this office, we, uh, we try
to use a holistic approach
37
00:01:49,985 --> 00:01:51,778
- to compensation.
- Mm.
38
00:01:51,903 --> 00:01:53,614
We want our clients not to be inhibited
39
00:01:53,739 --> 00:01:56,116
in their use of our services.
40
00:01:56,241 --> 00:01:57,826
So you charge me.
41
00:01:57,951 --> 00:01:59,328
Yeah.
42
00:01:59,453 --> 00:02:01,955
Uh, all right, I think
that takes care of it.
43
00:02:02,080 --> 00:02:04,207
- May I use your bathroom?
- Yeah, the bathroom's, uh,
44
00:02:04,333 --> 00:02:06,335
just to your right, down the hall.
45
00:02:06,460 --> 00:02:08,377
Right there at reception where you came
in, there's a little jog in the hallway.
46
00:02:08,502 --> 00:02:12,341
Yeah. No. I already saw that, but
I'm here, and, you know, it's...
47
00:02:12,466 --> 00:02:15,969
an infinitely better bathroom than to send
me to a public-- -Oh, it's nothing special.
48
00:02:16,094 --> 00:02:18,388
You'll be much happier down the hall.
We just redid 'em. They're great.
49
00:02:18,513 --> 00:02:20,389
I'll leave it exactly
the way I found it.
50
00:02:20,514 --> 00:02:22,601
I'm like a murderer going in there.
51
00:02:22,726 --> 00:02:26,813
I completely expunge all
evidence that I was ever there.
52
00:02:26,938 --> 00:02:29,524
Motion denied, as they
say in the profession.
53
00:02:33,320 --> 00:02:34,863
Where is it?
54
00:02:34,988 --> 00:02:37,407
[Roger] Down the hall and to the right.
55
00:02:38,532 --> 00:02:39,743
Hi.
56
00:02:39,868 --> 00:02:43,080
- Mr. David.
- Validation, please.
57
00:02:46,667 --> 00:02:48,960
Is that a problem?
58
00:02:49,086 --> 00:02:50,879
Well, I mean, to be perfectly honest,
59
00:02:51,004 --> 00:02:53,173
do you really think that you need it?
60
00:02:53,298 --> 00:02:55,217
It's not about the money, okay?
61
00:02:55,342 --> 00:02:58,553
It's about having to go
into your pants pocket,
62
00:02:58,679 --> 00:03:00,597
in a car when you're paying.
63
00:03:00,722 --> 00:03:03,600
Have you ever been in a car
trying to get to your pocket?
64
00:03:03,725 --> 00:03:06,645
- It does seem like a great deal of effort.
- Yes.
65
00:03:06,770 --> 00:03:08,897
This is why homeless people
don't make a lot of money
66
00:03:09,022 --> 00:03:11,983
from people in cars, 'cause nobody
wants to go into their pockets.
67
00:03:12,567 --> 00:03:14,528
There you are, Mr. David.
You have a lovely day.
68
00:03:14,653 --> 00:03:17,072
Yeah. Uh, you know what?
69
00:03:17,197 --> 00:03:19,032
This is only for an hour.
70
00:03:19,866 --> 00:03:21,993
I was here for at least an hour-ten.
71
00:03:24,162 --> 00:03:25,580
Sure thing.
72
00:03:25,706 --> 00:03:27,499
Here, Mr. David.
You have a good day.
73
00:03:27,624 --> 00:03:30,210
Hope to see you again. I intend
to be in this building a lot.
74
00:03:30,335 --> 00:03:32,379
That's fantastic.
75
00:03:40,887 --> 00:03:41,888
Hello?
76
00:03:42,013 --> 00:03:44,141
Larry, uh, this is Dr. Bahn.
77
00:03:44,266 --> 00:03:48,562
- Yeah?
- I'm not liking some of the numbers I'm seeing
78
00:03:48,687 --> 00:03:51,523
and would like to test
you for thyroid cancer.
79
00:03:53,150 --> 00:03:54,943
I would like to get an MRI
80
00:03:55,068 --> 00:03:56,361
just to be safe.
81
00:03:56,486 --> 00:03:58,405
Is there a mass?
82
00:03:58,530 --> 00:04:00,073
Yes. There is a mass.
83
00:04:00,198 --> 00:04:03,618
Has it... spread?
84
00:04:03,744 --> 00:04:05,120
Well, that we don't know, and that's why
85
00:04:05,245 --> 00:04:07,289
I'd like to get you in
for some tests today.
86
00:04:07,414 --> 00:04:09,750
- What are my odds?
- [Dr. Bahn] Uh, Larry, it's way too early
87
00:04:09,875 --> 00:04:11,376
to be thinking that way.
88
00:04:11,501 --> 00:04:13,128
Just contact my office, and, uh,
89
00:04:13,253 --> 00:04:15,380
we should get the results in two days.
90
00:04:32,981 --> 00:04:36,109
- [Andy] And a two of hearts.
- [Richard] Ooh, lucky you.
91
00:04:36,234 --> 00:04:37,319
Possible flush, no straight.
92
00:04:37,444 --> 00:04:38,570
- Go ahead, Leon. You got the bet.
- Woo!
93
00:04:38,695 --> 00:04:40,113
- You got the bet.
- See what I got.
94
00:04:40,238 --> 00:04:41,656
- [Larry] Come on, spend some money.
- Bam!
95
00:04:41,782 --> 00:04:42,824
- Nope.
- [Andy] Swat?
96
00:04:42,949 --> 00:04:44,659
- Richard?
- Two.
97
00:04:44,785 --> 00:04:46,036
Ooh.
98
00:04:46,161 --> 00:04:47,954
All right, I'm in.
99
00:04:48,079 --> 00:04:50,373
Why weren't you at the
fundraiser the other night?
100
00:04:50,499 --> 00:04:53,335
- For the prison art collectors?
- What, what, what fundraiser?
101
00:04:53,460 --> 00:04:54,920
For the prisoners who draw art.
102
00:04:55,045 --> 00:04:57,214
I sent you the invitation.
Why weren't you there?
103
00:04:57,339 --> 00:04:58,714
- I never got the invite.
- We sent it.
104
00:04:58,839 --> 00:05:01,176
Never got it.
Must have got lost in the mail.
105
00:05:01,301 --> 00:05:03,678
Aah boy. I don't trust the mail
anymore. I swear I don't.
106
00:05:03,803 --> 00:05:05,555
That stinks.
I would have gone to that.
107
00:05:05,680 --> 00:05:07,098
- You would have enjoyed it.
- [Leon] Wow.
108
00:05:07,224 --> 00:05:09,559
[Andy] All right, next
card is a ten of spades.
109
00:05:09,684 --> 00:05:11,812
- I'm out. I fold.
- [Andy] Okay, he's out. Go ahead.
110
00:05:11,937 --> 00:05:13,230
[Andy] You're out. You check.
111
00:05:13,355 --> 00:05:14,606
- [Richard] I fold.
- Fold.
112
00:05:14,731 --> 00:05:15,857
- Really?
- I just wanna give you-- Yeah.
113
00:05:15,982 --> 00:05:17,108
I wanna give you a heads up.
114
00:05:17,234 --> 00:05:18,819
Susie's birthday is in about a week.
115
00:05:18,944 --> 00:05:20,195
Why are you giving me a heads up?
116
00:05:20,320 --> 00:05:23,031
Uh, she told me to tell you.
117
00:05:23,156 --> 00:05:25,909
- Get the hell out of here. She told you to tell me?
- [Jeff] Yeah. Yeah.
118
00:05:26,034 --> 00:05:27,536
As a matter of fact, she wants a camera.
119
00:05:27,661 --> 00:05:29,913
She's shameless, this woman.
She's shameless.
120
00:05:30,038 --> 00:05:31,289
- It's unbelievable.
- Wow.
121
00:05:31,414 --> 00:05:33,333
You don't get to pick your gift, okay?
122
00:05:33,458 --> 00:05:35,710
- I'm not a Sears catalog.
- Just lettin' you know. Just lettin' you know.
123
00:05:35,836 --> 00:05:38,421
Anyway, I already got her something.
It's gonna be a nice surprise.
124
00:05:38,547 --> 00:05:39,923
- Really?
- [Larry] Yeah.
125
00:05:40,048 --> 00:05:41,383
All right, nine is the last card.
126
00:05:41,508 --> 00:05:42,926
You got the bet.
127
00:05:43,051 --> 00:05:45,011
Go ahead. You guys are out. Go ahead.
128
00:05:45,136 --> 00:05:47,138
I just want you to know before you bet,
I have a pair of aces.
129
00:05:47,264 --> 00:05:49,850
Okay.
Twenty bucks, aces.
130
00:05:50,350 --> 00:05:53,186
I have a pair of aces.
I call. What do you have?
131
00:05:53,311 --> 00:05:57,858
[Larry] Okay. I got three nines.
132
00:05:57,983 --> 00:05:59,943
- Ooh! Shit!
- [Andy] That's unbelievable.
133
00:06:00,068 --> 00:06:00,944
- Huh?
- [Leon] Ate your ass for dinner.
134
00:06:01,069 --> 00:06:02,404
On the river, you get a nine.
135
00:06:02,529 --> 00:06:03,654
[Richard] Cincinnati Kid.
136
00:06:03,779 --> 00:06:05,407
You are the luckiest guy around.
137
00:06:05,532 --> 00:06:07,325
- Honest to God.
- Yeah, yeah, luckiest guy around.
138
00:06:07,450 --> 00:06:09,870
I went to the doctor this
week, and, I, uh...
139
00:06:10,537 --> 00:06:12,247
She found something, and...
140
00:06:12,372 --> 00:06:15,500
- She's testing for, you know, cancer, so...
- [Jeff] Wow.
141
00:06:15,625 --> 00:06:17,460
- I'll find out in a few days.
- Really?
142
00:06:17,586 --> 00:06:19,504
- Yeah. I'm sure it's nothing, you know.
- [Jeff] You're kidding me.
143
00:06:19,629 --> 00:06:20,797
[Leon] Shit, Larry. God damn.
144
00:06:20,922 --> 00:06:22,257
You're up.
145
00:06:22,382 --> 00:06:24,593
Well, I just want to let you know,
146
00:06:24,718 --> 00:06:25,802
lettin' you know,
147
00:06:25,927 --> 00:06:28,178
- if you do have cancer...
- Mm.
148
00:06:28,305 --> 00:06:29,639
...I can't be your friend anymore.
149
00:06:29,764 --> 00:06:32,183
I-I'm not a cancer friend.
I can't do the cancer friend.
150
00:06:32,309 --> 00:06:34,185
- That's not me. It's too much. Too much.
- Mm. Yeah.
151
00:06:34,311 --> 00:06:36,438
You know, I gotta agree with Jeff.
152
00:06:36,563 --> 00:06:40,025
If you get cancer,
I'll never speak to you again.
153
00:06:40,150 --> 00:06:41,776
- [Andy] Wow.
- I get that. Yeah.
154
00:06:41,902 --> 00:06:43,987
When I found out my daddy had cancer,
155
00:06:44,112 --> 00:06:45,906
I never spoke to that man again.
156
00:06:46,031 --> 00:06:48,074
- I even stopped taking his calls.
- Wow. Really?
157
00:06:48,199 --> 00:06:49,367
- [Swat] Yep.
- Did he die?
158
00:06:49,492 --> 00:06:51,286
I don't know.
159
00:06:51,411 --> 00:06:52,454
- Mm.
- Whoa.
160
00:06:52,579 --> 00:06:54,289
[Leon] That's fuckin' deep, man.
161
00:06:54,414 --> 00:06:56,374
All right I'll tell you
what. I have a proposal.
162
00:06:56,499 --> 00:06:58,668
Let's make a little deal here, okay?
163
00:06:58,793 --> 00:07:01,463
A no-cancer friend reciprocity pact.
164
00:07:01,588 --> 00:07:03,882
If anyone gets it, we all
stop being friends with you,
165
00:07:04,007 --> 00:07:05,216
and vice versa.
166
00:07:05,342 --> 00:07:07,385
- There you go!
- Very gracious of you!
167
00:07:09,303 --> 00:07:11,431
Don't fuck up. Don't fuck with me,
I won't fuck with you.
168
00:07:11,556 --> 00:07:13,475
- [Larry] All right.
- Leon, your deal. Come on, let's play poker.
169
00:07:13,600 --> 00:07:14,976
- [Leon] Let's go, baby.
- [Jeff] Okay.
170
00:07:21,274 --> 00:07:23,193
Sorry I'm late.
171
00:07:23,318 --> 00:07:25,528
- It's okay.
- You know what?
172
00:07:25,654 --> 00:07:27,822
I detest every single person in a car.
173
00:07:27,948 --> 00:07:30,158
- There are a lot of stupid drivers, yeah.
- Yeah.
174
00:07:30,283 --> 00:07:31,993
How are you feeling?
175
00:07:32,118 --> 00:07:33,495
I'm better.
176
00:07:33,620 --> 00:07:35,705
- I'm a lot better.
- I'm really sorry about
177
00:07:35,830 --> 00:07:37,666
that talc incident.
178
00:07:37,791 --> 00:07:39,584
I say next time, just...
179
00:07:40,460 --> 00:07:42,045
do the shower, yeah.
180
00:07:42,170 --> 00:07:44,923
{\an8}Yeah. Oh, geez, look at,
look at this thing.
181
00:07:45,048 --> 00:07:46,466
{\an8}- Huh?
- Yeah, I know, it's--
182
00:07:46,591 --> 00:07:49,052
{\an8}Jesus, look, look, what--
I, I don't understand it.
183
00:07:49,177 --> 00:07:50,637
- Another wobbly table.
- I know.
184
00:07:50,762 --> 00:07:52,597
They're all over.
It's an epidemic.
185
00:07:52,722 --> 00:07:55,684
I'm gonna end the wobbly table
epidemic, in my coffee house.
186
00:07:55,809 --> 00:07:58,645
- Mm.
- Ours are gonna be cemented in...
187
00:07:58,770 --> 00:08:00,563
- They're gonna be cemented in the ground.
- Mm-hmm.
188
00:08:00,689 --> 00:08:02,816
Ah. You know what?
I think I'll do a little, uh,
189
00:08:02,941 --> 00:08:04,859
a little side-sitting.
190
00:08:05,360 --> 00:08:07,612
- A side-sit?
- Yeah. A side-sit.
191
00:08:07,737 --> 00:08:09,447
I don't think that's a good idea.
192
00:08:09,572 --> 00:08:12,617
- Why? What's the big deal?
- Well, it's, uh, very intimate.
193
00:08:12,742 --> 00:08:15,704
I-- This is too far to talk to somebody.
194
00:08:15,829 --> 00:08:17,539
It feels a little close.
195
00:08:17,664 --> 00:08:19,749
- I don't think so.
- Okay.
196
00:08:19,874 --> 00:08:21,042
Oh.
197
00:08:21,167 --> 00:08:22,335
- There you go.
- Thank you.
198
00:08:22,460 --> 00:08:26,089
[Larry] It's my mailman.
His name's Lionel.
199
00:08:26,214 --> 00:08:27,215
Hey.
200
00:08:27,340 --> 00:08:29,217
- [Cheryl] Lionel?
- [Larry] Yeah.
201
00:08:29,342 --> 00:08:31,011
- Take care. Have a good day.
- Thank you. You too.
202
00:08:31,136 --> 00:08:34,431
Yeah. Something about that
guy gives me the creeps.
203
00:08:34,556 --> 00:08:36,641
- Yeah.
- Um...
204
00:08:36,766 --> 00:08:41,312
- How are you doing?
- Good. Can I introduce you to my friend, the elephant?
205
00:08:41,438 --> 00:08:43,606
Huh? He's a big boy.
206
00:08:43,732 --> 00:08:46,568
- Keeps growing.
- Yes, yes.
207
00:08:47,444 --> 00:08:49,154
I mean, how do you feel about it?
208
00:08:49,279 --> 00:08:52,615
Well, I feel the same
as I've always felt.
209
00:08:52,741 --> 00:08:55,368
I think we should...
I think we should be together.
210
00:08:56,953 --> 00:08:58,621
Yeah, I don't...
211
00:08:58,747 --> 00:09:00,832
I don't think that's a good idea.
212
00:09:02,876 --> 00:09:04,669
I think we need to...
213
00:09:05,587 --> 00:09:08,048
end it, call it off.
214
00:09:08,173 --> 00:09:10,467
I think we should be apart.
215
00:09:13,053 --> 00:09:15,054
You know, I...
216
00:09:15,179 --> 00:09:16,639
I was at the doctor,
217
00:09:16,765 --> 00:09:18,725
and I'm waiting to get some...
218
00:09:19,350 --> 00:09:20,852
test results back.
219
00:09:20,977 --> 00:09:22,937
Oh. What kind of tests?
220
00:09:23,063 --> 00:09:25,398
Could be...
221
00:09:26,024 --> 00:09:27,400
cancer?
222
00:09:27,525 --> 00:09:29,527
It's just a test, right?
223
00:09:29,652 --> 00:09:30,487
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
224
00:09:30,612 --> 00:09:31,821
It's a test, but...
225
00:09:31,946 --> 00:09:33,698
- it's a test for cancer.
- Right.
226
00:09:33,823 --> 00:09:35,784
I mean, a lot of people get tested.
227
00:09:35,909 --> 00:09:37,785
Not for cancer.
228
00:09:37,910 --> 00:09:39,828
- Yeah, a lot of people get tested for cancer.
- No, this is cancer.
229
00:09:39,953 --> 00:09:41,831
- It's a cancer test.
- I know a lot of people--
230
00:09:41,956 --> 00:09:43,708
No, this is cancer.
231
00:09:43,833 --> 00:09:46,419
- Um...
- Serious, serious test.
232
00:09:47,003 --> 00:09:49,214
- Could you excuse us for a sec?
- Sure.
233
00:09:49,339 --> 00:09:52,133
Well, I hope your tests
come back negative,
234
00:09:52,258 --> 00:09:54,469
but we're not gonna get back together.
235
00:09:55,220 --> 00:09:59,432
Hypothetically, suppose
she told me I had...
236
00:09:59,557 --> 00:10:01,226
two years.
237
00:10:01,351 --> 00:10:03,895
Would that alter your
thinking about us at all?
238
00:10:04,020 --> 00:10:08,232
- You mean, get together for two years until you died?
- Yeah. Yeah.
239
00:10:08,357 --> 00:10:09,984
I think you'd have a pretty good time.
240
00:10:10,110 --> 00:10:12,153
- Do you? Yeah.
- Yeah I'd be complaining a little bit.
241
00:10:12,278 --> 00:10:14,197
But I can get a nurse and
complain to the nurse
242
00:10:14,322 --> 00:10:16,282
and leave you out of that part.
243
00:10:16,407 --> 00:10:19,744
Well, let's see what the tests... say.
244
00:10:20,370 --> 00:10:22,330
You know, we could do
a lot of traveling.
245
00:10:22,455 --> 00:10:23,832
You don't like to travel.
246
00:10:23,957 --> 00:10:25,958
Would you mind if
I brought the nurse along?
247
00:10:26,083 --> 00:10:29,003
Okay. I think we're good the way we are.
248
00:10:31,589 --> 00:10:32,881
Yeah.
249
00:10:35,927 --> 00:10:37,971
All right.
250
00:10:39,681 --> 00:10:42,392
- What are you gonna get?
- I don't give a fuck.
251
00:10:43,309 --> 00:10:45,352
[Milos] Okay, Mr. Greene.
252
00:10:45,477 --> 00:10:48,439
Almost finished. Just need to
pick up two-- -Larry: Hey, Milos!
253
00:10:48,565 --> 00:10:50,525
How ya doing?
254
00:10:50,650 --> 00:10:53,486
- Good. How are you?
- Good. You coming over to the coffee store later?
255
00:10:53,611 --> 00:10:56,280
- Of course. I'll be there. I got to finish up. See you.
- [Larry] Beautiful. Thank you.
256
00:10:56,405 --> 00:10:59,784
- Milos, he's gonna be doing some work in the coffee place.
- Yeah, he's fantastic.
257
00:10:59,909 --> 00:11:01,369
Wh-what's that?
258
00:11:01,494 --> 00:11:03,163
It's a little somethin' for your wife.
259
00:11:03,288 --> 00:11:05,498
A birthday present.
Huh?
260
00:11:06,291 --> 00:11:08,001
So how'd it go with Cheryl?
261
00:11:08,543 --> 00:11:10,086
Not gonna happen.
262
00:11:10,211 --> 00:11:11,713
- No!
- Yeah.
263
00:11:11,838 --> 00:11:14,174
- I'm sorry, man.
- Well, you know, it's a long shot, anyway.
264
00:11:14,299 --> 00:11:16,801
- Did you think it would happen?
- No, I knew it was a long shot,
265
00:11:16,926 --> 00:11:18,636
but what are, you know,
what are you gonna do?
266
00:11:18,761 --> 00:11:21,973
I'll tell you what you do.
You're gonna get back out there.
267
00:11:22,098 --> 00:11:23,725
You can't date now.
You can't--
268
00:11:23,850 --> 00:11:25,643
How do you even make a
move in this climate?
269
00:11:25,768 --> 00:11:30,064
Plus, I got that sexual harassment
thing from the, uh, assistant.
270
00:11:30,190 --> 00:11:32,734
And I'm old and bald.
271
00:11:32,859 --> 00:11:34,027
- Old and bald.
- Yeah.
272
00:11:34,152 --> 00:11:35,904
- That means nothing.
- Please. Are you kidding?
273
00:11:36,029 --> 00:11:39,324
- You're rich!
- You think rich beats old and bald?
274
00:11:39,449 --> 00:11:42,994
You could have mutton chops
and wear a, a cartoon tie
275
00:11:43,119 --> 00:11:45,121
of, uh, Felix the Cat.
276
00:11:45,246 --> 00:11:46,664
Some old-timey cartoon.
277
00:11:46,789 --> 00:11:48,875
You can, you
can paint them blue,
278
00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:51,753
and wear an Abe Lincoln hat.
You'll be fine.
279
00:11:51,878 --> 00:11:53,004
- Really?
- Trust me. Yeah.
280
00:11:53,129 --> 00:11:55,173
Okay. I'm gonna get back out there.
281
00:11:55,298 --> 00:11:56,549
I gotta ask you something.
282
00:11:56,674 --> 00:11:58,426
The other night at poker,
283
00:11:58,551 --> 00:12:00,553
that invitation, it, it didn't get lost.
284
00:12:00,678 --> 00:12:02,639
- No, of course not.
- You made that whole thing up.
285
00:12:02,764 --> 00:12:05,141
- Yeah. Totally made it up.
- Oh, you're good.
286
00:12:05,266 --> 00:12:06,476
Blame it on the mailman.
287
00:12:06,601 --> 00:12:08,186
- Blame it on the mailman.
- Yeah.
288
00:12:08,311 --> 00:12:10,230
- [Susie] Jeffrey!
- Oh...
289
00:12:10,355 --> 00:12:11,773
- Oh, hi, Lar.
- Oh, hello.
290
00:12:11,898 --> 00:12:13,942
- I didn't know you were here.
- [Larry] I am here.
291
00:12:14,067 --> 00:12:16,361
- Yeah? What?
- Stand right there.
292
00:12:16,486 --> 00:12:18,071
- [Susie] Okay.
- Don't move.
293
00:12:18,196 --> 00:12:19,530
What? What? What?
294
00:12:19,948 --> 00:12:22,867
- What is that?
- What is it? It's for you!
295
00:12:22,992 --> 00:12:25,912
- For your birthday!
- You've never gotten me a birthday gift.
296
00:12:26,037 --> 00:12:27,288
I did this year!
297
00:12:27,413 --> 00:12:28,957
Yeah, what is it?
What is it?
298
00:12:30,291 --> 00:12:32,669
[Susie] Oh, my God. Larry!
299
00:12:32,794 --> 00:12:34,921
- Oh, my God!
- Huh? You love it?
300
00:12:35,046 --> 00:12:36,589
[Larry] I had it commissioned.
A great artist.
301
00:12:36,714 --> 00:12:38,216
Gave me a big discount.
302
00:12:38,341 --> 00:12:40,510
- You had this made for me?
- Yeah.
303
00:12:40,635 --> 00:12:43,972
- From you, of all people, 'cause you're not a giver.
- No.
304
00:12:44,389 --> 00:12:46,557
[Susie] Oh, my God.
305
00:12:46,683 --> 00:12:49,602
It's absolutely magnificent.
306
00:12:49,727 --> 00:12:52,563
It's magnificent.
It's a work of art.
307
00:12:52,689 --> 00:12:54,399
It's not just 'cause it's me.
308
00:12:54,524 --> 00:12:56,401
All is forgiven.
309
00:12:56,526 --> 00:12:57,986
Everything you've ever done,
310
00:12:58,111 --> 00:12:59,320
every horrible thing
311
00:12:59,445 --> 00:13:00,697
you've done to me is forgiven for this.
312
00:13:00,822 --> 00:13:02,907
What are you talking about?
What have I done?
313
00:13:03,032 --> 00:13:04,742
- Oh, my God. Jeff, what...
- What are you forgiving?
314
00:13:04,867 --> 00:13:07,953
Oh, wait a minute. I gotta go
talk to this fuckin' Milos.
315
00:13:08,078 --> 00:13:11,916
Screwing up my deck.
Hey, Milos! Milos!
316
00:13:12,041 --> 00:13:13,376
What were you thinking?
317
00:13:13,501 --> 00:13:15,878
I thought I told you a
camera, a fucking camera.
318
00:13:16,004 --> 00:13:18,047
- [Susie] This is mahogany cream.
- You fucked me.
319
00:13:18,172 --> 00:13:20,425
- [Larry] What?
- [Susie] It's shit. Do you understand what I'm saying?
320
00:13:20,550 --> 00:13:23,553
- [Milo] I wrote it down. Mahogany cream.
- Yes! This is mahogany cream!
321
00:13:23,678 --> 00:13:26,222
- This is not mahogany cream!
- This is mahogany cream.
322
00:13:26,347 --> 00:13:28,891
I'm not paying for this
piece of shit crap!
323
00:13:29,017 --> 00:13:31,811
You redo it, or you don't get paid.
324
00:13:31,936 --> 00:13:33,688
It's bullshit!
325
00:13:35,898 --> 00:13:38,776
- That poor bastard never had a chance.
- No.
326
00:13:46,576 --> 00:13:48,453
- Mr. David?
- Yeah?
327
00:13:48,578 --> 00:13:50,538
I've heard that you're going
around telling people
328
00:13:50,663 --> 00:13:52,623
that I've lost their invitations?
329
00:13:52,749 --> 00:13:54,292
Wh-where'd you get that from?
330
00:13:54,417 --> 00:13:56,085
Andy and Cassie David told me.
331
00:13:56,210 --> 00:13:58,087
Can I tell you a little story?
332
00:13:58,212 --> 00:13:59,881
I got invited to some
kind of fundraiser,
333
00:14:00,006 --> 00:14:02,967
prison art something. I-- you know,
I'm not gonna...
334
00:14:03,468 --> 00:14:05,886
I'm not gonna do that.
So I said...
335
00:14:06,011 --> 00:14:09,807
I never got the invitation.
It got lost in the mail.
336
00:14:10,975 --> 00:14:12,143
- Lost in the mail.
- Yeah.
337
00:14:12,268 --> 00:14:14,062
So, I'm the mail.
338
00:14:14,187 --> 00:14:16,606
Yes. In this particular case-- -I'm
the guy that is delivering the mail,
339
00:14:16,731 --> 00:14:18,775
so that is a stain on an
otherwise perfect record.
340
00:14:18,900 --> 00:14:20,568
I've never lost a piece of mail.
341
00:14:21,361 --> 00:14:24,989
- Come on. All right.
- Listen, I just need you to please...
342
00:14:25,114 --> 00:14:27,075
go tell Andy and Cassie
the truth about this.
343
00:14:27,200 --> 00:14:29,911
I'll consider it. Look, can
I give you a little tip?
344
00:14:30,036 --> 00:14:31,496
If you're gonna confront somebody
345
00:14:31,621 --> 00:14:33,414
and ask them to do something like this,
346
00:14:33,539 --> 00:14:36,084
it's better to do it with pants on.
347
00:14:36,209 --> 00:14:37,251
The shorts...
348
00:14:37,377 --> 00:14:39,587
{\an8}This is the required
uniform for a postman.
349
00:14:40,505 --> 00:14:41,923
- Really?
- Yeah.
350
00:14:42,048 --> 00:14:43,216
And the socks, too?
351
00:14:43,341 --> 00:14:45,301
- That's part of it? The black socks?
- Right.
352
00:14:45,426 --> 00:14:47,929
Yes. Post Office issued socks. Yes.
353
00:14:48,054 --> 00:14:49,055
They issue socks?
354
00:14:49,180 --> 00:14:50,890
- Yeah.
- How many pairs?
355
00:14:51,015 --> 00:14:52,475
What does that have to do with this?
356
00:14:52,600 --> 00:14:54,268
I'm just curious how often you
have to wash those socks.
357
00:14:54,394 --> 00:14:56,813
They give you five or six pairs,
and you rotate them. Okay?
358
00:14:56,938 --> 00:14:58,856
- How many pairs of shorts do they give you?
- Listen.
359
00:14:58,981 --> 00:15:00,691
If you don't want to go
to something, don't go,
360
00:15:00,817 --> 00:15:02,985
but don't hide behind
the US Postal Service.
361
00:15:03,111 --> 00:15:05,363
It's hard to take a person
seriously wearing shorts.
362
00:15:05,488 --> 00:15:07,615
I'm at work, doing work.
This is my work uniform.
363
00:15:07,740 --> 00:15:09,867
- I'm confronting you.
- I'm giving you, I'm giving you--
364
00:15:09,992 --> 00:15:11,536
- Excuse me one second.
I was giving you a good tip.
365
00:15:11,661 --> 00:15:13,204
- Good advice.
- Take the call.
366
00:15:13,329 --> 00:15:14,956
- I'm givin' you good advice.
- Just take the call.
367
00:15:15,081 --> 00:15:16,499
Hello?
368
00:15:16,624 --> 00:15:18,084
- Larry David?
- Larry Yes?
369
00:15:18,209 --> 00:15:19,502
It's Dr. Bahn.
370
00:15:19,627 --> 00:15:21,045
The test results came back.
371
00:15:21,170 --> 00:15:23,214
Aah. Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
372
00:15:23,339 --> 00:15:25,550
Dr. Bahn As you know,
we did a fine-needle biopsy,
373
00:15:25,675 --> 00:15:27,343
- on the mass.
- Oh, my God. This is bad.
374
00:15:27,468 --> 00:15:29,762
- [Dr. Bahn] And an MRI.
- It's bad. It's bad. What?
375
00:15:29,887 --> 00:15:32,723
It's just a benign cyst, not cancerous.
376
00:15:32,849 --> 00:15:35,852
- You're clean as a whistle.
- Ah! Ha-ha!
377
00:15:35,977 --> 00:15:38,104
Ah! Ha-ha-ha-ha!
378
00:15:38,229 --> 00:15:40,815
- Oh, thank you. Thank you!
- [Dr. Bahn] You're welcome.
379
00:15:40,940 --> 00:15:43,734
Ah! Negative! Negative!
380
00:15:44,318 --> 00:15:46,237
- Ah!
- Just... okay?
381
00:15:46,362 --> 00:15:48,489
- Fine. The matter at hand--
- I'll I'll talk to 'em.
382
00:15:48,614 --> 00:15:50,616
- Please tell Andy and Cassie...
- I'll talk to 'em. I'll talk to 'em.
383
00:15:50,741 --> 00:15:52,577
Yes.
384
00:15:52,702 --> 00:15:55,163
[Rita] Mr. Swindell will
be here in five minutes.
385
00:15:55,288 --> 00:15:57,039
- Make yourself comfortable.
- Okay.
386
00:15:57,165 --> 00:15:58,166
All right.
387
00:16:43,503 --> 00:16:45,630
- Okay. Hey, Larry.
- [Larry] Oh, hey!
388
00:16:45,755 --> 00:16:48,382
- Sorry to keep you waiting.
- Oh, no, no. Don't be silly.
389
00:16:48,508 --> 00:16:49,800
All's good?
You've been well?
390
00:16:49,926 --> 00:16:53,638
Funny you should mention it,
'cause I had a bit of a scare
391
00:16:53,763 --> 00:16:56,682
at the doctor,
I just got the results back,
392
00:16:56,807 --> 00:16:59,227
and, uh... I'm good.
393
00:16:59,352 --> 00:17:01,187
Oh, that's great.
You must be relieved.
394
00:17:01,312 --> 00:17:04,398
Well, I'm relieved, except it's
been two days since I found out,
395
00:17:04,523 --> 00:17:08,027
and not one of my friends has inquired
396
00:17:08,152 --> 00:17:10,571
as to how the test turned out, not one.
397
00:17:10,696 --> 00:17:13,366
- I see.
- I'm gonna dump the whole bunch of 'em.
398
00:17:13,491 --> 00:17:15,952
- I'll get myself some new friends.
- That's great news.
399
00:17:16,077 --> 00:17:19,622
- Maybe, uh, maybe we could strike up a friendship.
- I'm relieved for you.
400
00:17:20,665 --> 00:17:23,042
I, I have a busy life, and, uh...
401
00:17:23,167 --> 00:17:25,169
but, uh, I am,
I am really relieved
402
00:17:25,294 --> 00:17:27,004
- that you got the news that you got.
- Mm thank you.
403
00:17:27,129 --> 00:17:29,257
And I have some other
good news for you, too.
404
00:17:29,382 --> 00:17:32,093
Which is that Ms. Huff's
team gave me a call,
405
00:17:32,218 --> 00:17:34,887
and she would like to meet with you.
406
00:17:35,012 --> 00:17:36,513
Face-to-face,
407
00:17:36,638 --> 00:17:38,432
just the two of you alone in
a public place, of course.
408
00:17:38,558 --> 00:17:39,850
Alice wants to meet?
409
00:17:39,976 --> 00:17:41,561
The fact that she is
reaching out is great.
410
00:17:41,686 --> 00:17:44,272
That's fantastic.
Maybe she's come to her senses.
411
00:17:44,397 --> 00:17:46,315
If you just give her the chance to air
412
00:17:46,440 --> 00:17:48,568
whatever she wants to air,
listen to her, and maybe...
413
00:17:48,693 --> 00:17:50,570
Yeah, sure, yeah. I'll listen.
I'll-- we'll air. Yeah, listen and air.
414
00:17:50,695 --> 00:17:52,905
[Roger] Then the whole
thing could go away.
415
00:17:53,030 --> 00:17:55,157
- That's good news. Look at you. The bearer of good tidings.
- Uh, sorry.
416
00:17:55,282 --> 00:17:57,994
Hold on one second.
Just to get a tissue.
417
00:18:08,045 --> 00:18:09,630
What's up?
418
00:18:15,303 --> 00:18:17,096
Problem?
419
00:18:17,221 --> 00:18:18,681
Did you use my bathroom?
420
00:18:18,806 --> 00:18:20,349
What? No.
Absolutely not.
421
00:18:20,474 --> 00:18:22,518
Why would I use your bathroom?
You told me not to.
422
00:18:22,643 --> 00:18:24,311
I mean, you did ask to use it.
423
00:18:24,436 --> 00:18:27,273
Yes, I did, but you were
quite emphatic about it.
424
00:18:27,398 --> 00:18:29,483
And, uh, you know, well,
what am I gonna do?
425
00:18:29,609 --> 00:18:32,903
- That's, that's the rule.
- Your interest was not casual.
426
00:18:33,029 --> 00:18:34,739
I'm telling you the truth.
427
00:18:41,746 --> 00:18:44,248
- It's your old pal.
- Mr. David.
428
00:18:44,373 --> 00:18:48,461
Beautiful view here. How long did it
take you to take it for granted?
429
00:18:48,586 --> 00:18:50,880
Um... not long,
I guess.
430
00:18:51,005 --> 00:18:52,757
It would take me about
a day, maybe less,
431
00:18:52,882 --> 00:18:54,258
maybe a half an hour.
432
00:18:54,383 --> 00:18:56,302
And I would never look
out the window again
433
00:18:56,427 --> 00:18:58,471
and go, "Ooh, look at that view."
434
00:18:58,596 --> 00:19:01,474
Anyway, here for some validation.
435
00:19:01,599 --> 00:19:02,975
Can I ask you something?
436
00:19:03,100 --> 00:19:05,811
Swindell-- have you ever
used his bathroom?
437
00:19:06,145 --> 00:19:09,231
- I have.
- What?
438
00:19:09,357 --> 00:19:12,484
Why fly public when you can
fly private, am I right?
439
00:19:12,609 --> 00:19:14,570
I mean, the public toilets, forget it.
440
00:19:14,695 --> 00:19:15,988
- Don't get me started.
- You can't do it.
441
00:19:16,113 --> 00:19:17,907
Have you been in a woman's restroom?
442
00:19:18,032 --> 00:19:19,950
Do you know how vile women can be?
443
00:19:20,076 --> 00:19:23,244
Women? Oh, that's nothing compared
to a men's room, nothing.
444
00:19:23,371 --> 00:19:24,997
You guys get to stand up.
We have to sit down.
445
00:19:25,122 --> 00:19:27,583
Hey, you know what? I'll take you
out for a night on the town.
446
00:19:27,708 --> 00:19:29,292
We'll go toilet-hopping.
447
00:19:29,417 --> 00:19:31,462
We'll, we'll look at men's
rooms and ladies' rooms,
448
00:19:31,587 --> 00:19:33,422
and we'll make a little comparison.
Would you like to do that?
449
00:19:33,547 --> 00:19:36,300
- As in a date?
- Yes, yes, a date.
450
00:19:36,425 --> 00:19:39,553
I know this is something you've probably
been dreaming about most of your life.
451
00:19:39,679 --> 00:19:42,598
"Oh, dear God, please let
me meet an old bald man,
452
00:19:42,723 --> 00:19:44,433
"who will take me toilet-hopping,
453
00:19:44,558 --> 00:19:47,269
"from toilet to toilet,
throughout the town.
454
00:19:47,395 --> 00:19:50,356
Please, God.
Please make that happen."
455
00:19:51,440 --> 00:19:52,692
I'm game.
456
00:19:53,526 --> 00:19:56,237
I, I, I don't even know
what to say. I'm shocked.
457
00:19:56,362 --> 00:19:59,031
- Validation?
- Yes. And your name is?
458
00:19:59,156 --> 00:20:00,574
My name is Rita.
459
00:20:00,700 --> 00:20:02,827
Rita. You'll be hearing from me.
460
00:20:02,952 --> 00:20:05,121
You lucky gal!
461
00:20:10,209 --> 00:20:12,420
What? What?
462
00:20:12,920 --> 00:20:14,422
Larry?
463
00:20:15,005 --> 00:20:16,799
- Hey.
- What's in there?
464
00:20:18,134 --> 00:20:20,469
Oh, it's a, uh... coffee place.
465
00:20:20,594 --> 00:20:22,763
I'm opening up a spite store
to take him out of business.
466
00:20:23,263 --> 00:20:25,850
I don't know what a spite store
is, and I don't really care.
467
00:20:25,975 --> 00:20:29,478
- I want to talk to you about something.
- Sure.
468
00:20:29,603 --> 00:20:32,064
Somebody told me you were
side-sitting Cheryl.
469
00:20:32,189 --> 00:20:35,693
- Who told you that?
- The mailman. He said he was in a restaurant
470
00:20:35,818 --> 00:20:37,403
and saw you side-sitting.
471
00:20:37,528 --> 00:20:39,571
You're making too much about a side-sit.
472
00:20:39,696 --> 00:20:41,323
I side-sit with everybody.
473
00:20:41,449 --> 00:20:43,117
I side-sit with my doctor,
I side-sit with my therapist.
474
00:20:43,242 --> 00:20:44,827
I've never seen you side-sit anybody.
475
00:20:44,952 --> 00:20:48,372
If you ever see me sitting,
you'll see me side-sitting.
476
00:20:55,713 --> 00:20:57,089
Hello?
477
00:20:57,214 --> 00:20:59,675
What were you thinkin' gettin'
Susie that painting?
478
00:20:59,800 --> 00:21:01,969
Aah, I'm-I'm so sorry.
479
00:21:02,094 --> 00:21:04,096
It stares at me!
It's just there!
480
00:21:04,221 --> 00:21:06,849
I go for a snack, it's staring at me!
481
00:21:06,974 --> 00:21:08,893
I wish there was somethin'
I could do.
482
00:21:09,018 --> 00:21:10,144
Well, I told you to get her a camera!
483
00:21:10,269 --> 00:21:11,936
Why couldn't you get her a camera?!
484
00:21:12,061 --> 00:21:13,731
I should have given her the camera.
485
00:21:13,856 --> 00:21:15,316
[Jeff over phone] Next time get her a camera!
486
00:21:15,441 --> 00:21:16,859
Believe me, there won't be a next time!
487
00:21:16,984 --> 00:21:18,694
Good! Don't get her anything again!
488
00:21:18,819 --> 00:21:20,988
I will never give anyone a gift
again. What do you think about that?
489
00:21:21,113 --> 00:21:22,990
[Jeff] I think it's the best
idea you've had all day!
490
00:21:23,115 --> 00:21:24,532
- I'm done with presents!
- My birthday's coming up in a month!
491
00:21:24,657 --> 00:21:26,118
- What are you gettin' me?!
- Nothin'!
492
00:21:26,243 --> 00:21:27,994
- [Jeff] Ha! Thank you!
- You're welcome!
493
00:21:28,119 --> 00:21:28,954
Aah!
494
00:21:33,042 --> 00:21:36,295
- [Larry] I like what you did with this apartment.
- [Rita] Thank you.
495
00:21:38,047 --> 00:21:40,382
- [Larry] You play the piano?
- [Rita] I don't. No.
496
00:21:40,508 --> 00:21:42,176
I borrowed it.
497
00:21:43,385 --> 00:21:45,805
You don't play, and you
borrowed a piano?
498
00:21:45,930 --> 00:21:47,598
It was a joke.
I didn't borrow the piano.
499
00:21:48,057 --> 00:21:50,184
Well, that's quite a, uh...
500
00:21:50,309 --> 00:21:52,353
That's quite an attempt at a joke.
501
00:21:52,478 --> 00:21:54,271
Thank you.
You could use it.
502
00:21:54,396 --> 00:21:55,731
That's okay.
503
00:21:56,398 --> 00:22:00,653
All right, well, we've come to that
juncture in the evening where...
504
00:22:01,320 --> 00:22:05,449
a move of some kind is either...
505
00:22:06,325 --> 00:22:10,287
required or, uh... expected.
506
00:22:10,412 --> 00:22:11,747
I agree.
507
00:22:11,872 --> 00:22:13,499
- You agree?
- I do.
508
00:22:13,624 --> 00:22:15,667
- That's good. That's good. Now...
- That's good.
509
00:22:15,792 --> 00:22:17,378
...given the current climate,
510
00:22:17,503 --> 00:22:20,381
I would like to ask you
a series of questions
511
00:22:20,506 --> 00:22:23,509
to determine how comfortable you are
512
00:22:23,634 --> 00:22:26,428
with physical contact as it progresses.
513
00:22:26,554 --> 00:22:28,013
All right.
That sounds fair.
514
00:22:28,138 --> 00:22:32,226
I'd like to begin by
taking my right hand
515
00:22:32,351 --> 00:22:34,395
and place it on your right shoulder.
516
00:22:35,020 --> 00:22:37,690
- Would that be acceptable?
- That is acceptable. Yes.
517
00:22:37,815 --> 00:22:39,775
- Ah. Okay.
- Okay.
518
00:22:42,319 --> 00:22:45,489
- Now I'd like to take this left hand of mine...
- Yes.
519
00:22:45,614 --> 00:22:47,992
...and place it under your rib cage,
520
00:22:48,117 --> 00:22:49,702
fairly close to the right breast,
521
00:22:49,827 --> 00:22:51,412
but keeping a safe distance.
522
00:22:51,537 --> 00:22:52,997
That is acceptable.
523
00:22:54,707 --> 00:22:56,417
- There we go.
- That's very nice.
524
00:22:56,542 --> 00:22:59,044
Ah! By the way, throughout this process,
525
00:22:59,169 --> 00:23:01,297
I would encourage any feedback.
526
00:23:01,422 --> 00:23:04,592
- Well, and I would expect the same from you.
- Oh.
527
00:23:05,092 --> 00:23:09,305
How would you feel about a
little grazing of the lips?
528
00:23:09,430 --> 00:23:11,181
I think I would feel
very good about that.
529
00:23:11,307 --> 00:23:13,976
Well, then a grazing you shall have.
530
00:23:16,729 --> 00:23:18,105
Aha.
531
00:23:18,230 --> 00:23:19,815
And now...
532
00:23:19,940 --> 00:23:21,191
I would like to...
533
00:23:21,317 --> 00:23:23,444
graze again, but this time,
534
00:23:23,569 --> 00:23:26,405
with some intertwining of the tongue.
535
00:23:27,281 --> 00:23:29,867
- We could do that.
- Excellent!
536
00:23:34,455 --> 00:23:35,955
Hmm.
537
00:23:36,080 --> 00:23:38,459
Well, now I think we have
to take a little break.
538
00:23:38,584 --> 00:23:42,421
With your permission, of course,
I would like to take a video
539
00:23:42,546 --> 00:23:44,965
in order to document the evening.
540
00:23:45,090 --> 00:23:48,093
You know, just in case there
are any discrepancies
541
00:23:48,218 --> 00:23:51,013
of the he-said, she-said variety.
542
00:23:51,138 --> 00:23:53,057
- Would you be able to forward that to me?
- Of course.
543
00:23:53,182 --> 00:23:55,392
I will forward it to you and cc,
544
00:23:55,517 --> 00:23:57,478
or bcc to anyone you like.
545
00:23:57,603 --> 00:23:58,938
Fantastic.
546
00:23:59,063 --> 00:24:01,190
[Larry] Begin session.
547
00:24:02,107 --> 00:24:04,234
- This is Rita.
- Hi.
548
00:24:04,359 --> 00:24:06,612
Um, Rita, you're here
under your own volition?
549
00:24:06,737 --> 00:24:09,782
{\an8}- I am. Yes.
- Nobody forced you here. Isn't that correct?
550
00:24:09,907 --> 00:24:11,492
{\an8}That is correct.
Nobody forced me.
551
00:24:11,617 --> 00:24:13,953
{\an8}- You're not here under duress of any kind?
- No.
552
00:24:14,078 --> 00:24:16,997
{\an8}- You're kind of enjoying yourself, are you not?
- I am.
553
00:24:17,122 --> 00:24:18,916
{\an8}Nothing, uh, untoward has happened.
554
00:24:19,041 --> 00:24:20,667
{\an8}Nothing's happened without
your permission.
555
00:24:20,792 --> 00:24:22,503
{\an8}- Absolutely not.
- Thus far.
556
00:24:22,628 --> 00:24:24,046
Okay.
557
00:24:24,171 --> 00:24:25,839
- Let's continue.
- Let's.
558
00:24:25,965 --> 00:24:29,176
I'm placing my right hand
back on her right shoulder,
559
00:24:29,301 --> 00:24:31,929
- with her permission, of course.
- Yes.
560
00:24:32,054 --> 00:24:35,975
And now, what I'd like to
do is take this left hand,
561
00:24:36,100 --> 00:24:37,810
which I've introduced to you earlier,
562
00:24:37,935 --> 00:24:40,229
I'm going to place it
on your inner thigh,
563
00:24:40,354 --> 00:24:43,357
{\an8}and slowly inch my way up,
564
00:24:43,482 --> 00:24:46,484
{\an8}in a crab-like fashion,
565
00:24:46,609 --> 00:24:48,862
Well, seeing as it is
our first date, Larry,
566
00:24:48,988 --> 00:24:51,865
I think that I'm going to
have to say no to that.
567
00:24:52,491 --> 00:24:54,994
{\an8}- I'm perfectly okay with that.
- Okay.
568
00:24:55,119 --> 00:24:57,371
And what if I took this same left hand,
569
00:24:57,496 --> 00:24:59,123
and extended it laterally
570
00:24:59,248 --> 00:25:00,874
{\an8}and somehow wind up
571
00:25:01,000 --> 00:25:02,835
{\an8}on that right breast,
572
00:25:02,960 --> 00:25:06,588
{\an8}and perhaps, uh, gave it
a little, uh, squeeze.
573
00:25:06,714 --> 00:25:09,717
{\an8}Uh, that would be the worst
thing in the world?
574
00:25:10,134 --> 00:25:12,219
{\an8}I'm gonna have to say no again.
575
00:25:12,344 --> 00:25:13,846
Okay. Another no.
576
00:25:13,971 --> 00:25:16,724
{\an8}Hand's away. Look at the hand. All gone.
577
00:25:16,849 --> 00:25:18,267
Well.
578
00:25:19,143 --> 00:25:22,980
- It seems we've reached a bit of an impasse.
- I think so.
579
00:25:24,606 --> 00:25:26,859
{\an8}End session.
580
00:25:37,494 --> 00:25:40,122
Well, I'd like to propose a toast
581
00:25:40,247 --> 00:25:41,623
to Andy and Cassie.
582
00:25:41,749 --> 00:25:43,375
- Welcome to the West Coast.
- Hear! Hear!
583
00:25:43,500 --> 00:25:45,586
I'm sorry it took us so long to get you here.
584
00:25:45,711 --> 00:25:47,421
- [Susie] But here you are.
- [Andy] Thank you so much.
585
00:25:47,546 --> 00:25:49,131
- [Jeff] Yes.
- It's a beautiful home.
586
00:25:49,256 --> 00:25:51,215
[Susie] Yeah, well, you know
I have a-- -And this is...
587
00:25:51,340 --> 00:25:52,968
This is quite an addition.
588
00:25:53,093 --> 00:25:54,470
Isn't it?
Isn't that something?
589
00:25:54,595 --> 00:25:55,888
You know, if I tell you
590
00:25:56,013 --> 00:25:58,015
who got that for me,
you're gonna be shocked.
591
00:25:58,140 --> 00:26:00,350
Larry David, the most thoughtful man
592
00:26:00,476 --> 00:26:02,853
I've ever met, had that commissioned.
593
00:26:02,978 --> 00:26:05,064
Where do you find an artist like that?
594
00:26:05,189 --> 00:26:07,357
You'll find it.
You look it up.
595
00:26:07,483 --> 00:26:10,152
You know what I love about it is...
596
00:26:10,736 --> 00:26:12,196
- the size.
- [Susie] The dimensions.
597
00:26:12,321 --> 00:26:13,781
- Yes. I know.
- Oh, the dimensions.
598
00:26:13,906 --> 00:26:15,782
Anything smaller would
have felt too small.
599
00:26:15,907 --> 00:26:17,451
Bigger would have felt ostentatious.
600
00:26:17,576 --> 00:26:19,411
[Richard] It's not even that,
Susie.
601
00:26:19,536 --> 00:26:21,914
Know what it is? I've never
seen you with, I don't know,
602
00:26:22,039 --> 00:26:24,249
with such a joy for life
603
00:26:24,374 --> 00:26:26,085
- in that painting.
- [Susie] Yeah, they captured that in me, didn't they?
604
00:26:26,210 --> 00:26:28,045
- [Richard] Absolutely.
- [Andy] It's something.
605
00:26:28,170 --> 00:26:29,630
Did you have to send him a picture
606
00:26:29,755 --> 00:26:31,423
and then he painted it from that?
607
00:26:32,132 --> 00:26:33,592
Yeah.
608
00:26:33,717 --> 00:26:35,219
[Cassie] How long does it take
once you get the artist--
609
00:26:35,344 --> 00:26:37,387
I don't know.
A couple of weeks.
610
00:26:37,513 --> 00:26:39,348
- Okay? Took a couple of weeks.
- [Cassie] Okay.
611
00:26:39,473 --> 00:26:41,850
- Mm.
- LD, what the hell's wrong with you?
612
00:26:43,602 --> 00:26:46,522
Three days now. I've gotten the
results back from my cancer test.
613
00:26:46,647 --> 00:26:48,898
Not one of you bothered
to call me and ask me
614
00:26:49,023 --> 00:26:51,109
if I got the results back.
Not one.
615
00:26:51,234 --> 00:26:55,155
And by the way, I did,
and I'm fine. Okay?
616
00:26:56,532 --> 00:27:00,494
- Skyler had this paper due for social studies.
- It was on Cuba.
617
00:27:00,619 --> 00:27:02,704
We were, we're very immersed in it.
618
00:27:02,830 --> 00:27:04,915
- I'm sorry. You're right.
- [Cassie] He's been working with her nonstop.
619
00:27:05,040 --> 00:27:07,667
And I, I, I honestly planned on it,
620
00:27:07,792 --> 00:27:10,254
but I, I,
I planned on it.
621
00:27:10,379 --> 00:27:12,256
I ain't gonna lie, man.
I fuckin' forgot.
622
00:27:12,381 --> 00:27:15,467
- [Leon] My bad.
- I already explained myself. All right?
623
00:27:15,592 --> 00:27:17,386
What kind of friends are you?
624
00:27:17,511 --> 00:27:18,887
Seriously! What kind of friends are you?
625
00:27:19,012 --> 00:27:20,848
- But you're fine, right?
- [Larry] Yeah, I'm fine!
626
00:27:20,973 --> 00:27:23,267
{\an8}You know what?
You can all go fuck yourself!
627
00:27:23,392 --> 00:27:24,393
[Leon] Oh, shit!
628
00:27:24,518 --> 00:27:26,228
[Richard] Holy Christ!
629
00:27:30,357 --> 00:27:34,153
You ruined my painting!
You destroyed it!
630
00:27:35,779 --> 00:27:37,030
Jeff?
631
00:27:37,489 --> 00:27:40,200
What kind of piece of shit,
632
00:27:40,325 --> 00:27:42,494
motherfucker does something like that?
633
00:27:42,619 --> 00:27:44,788
Where the fuck do you get off?
634
00:27:44,913 --> 00:27:46,999
This was the prized possession
635
00:27:47,124 --> 00:27:49,917
- of this household.
- I'm so sorry.
636
00:27:50,042 --> 00:27:51,879
- So... You know what?
- What?
637
00:27:52,004 --> 00:27:53,630
I'm gonna replace that painting.
638
00:27:53,755 --> 00:27:55,674
I'm gonna give it to the
artist, he's gonna fix it,
639
00:27:55,799 --> 00:27:57,301
it's gonna be better than ever.
640
00:27:57,426 --> 00:28:00,220
You don't bring it back
until it's perfect.
641
00:28:00,345 --> 00:28:02,055
- Don't worry. I won't.
- Wait. Stop, stop!
642
00:28:02,181 --> 00:28:05,017
We were at LACMA, and we met this
guy who restores paintings.
643
00:28:05,142 --> 00:28:07,895
- He restores paintings. He's amazing!
- No, no, no, no.
644
00:28:08,020 --> 00:28:11,106
Larry, we're gonna
help out. Don't you worry.
645
00:28:11,231 --> 00:28:13,942
Hey! Shut the fuck up!
I told you I'm gonna do it!
646
00:28:14,067 --> 00:28:15,736
Okay! Okay!
647
00:28:16,945 --> 00:28:18,196
[Susie] God!
648
00:28:18,321 --> 00:28:20,032
[Larry] You know what?
649
00:28:20,157 --> 00:28:23,202
I think this whole thing can
be a blessing in disguise.
650
00:28:23,327 --> 00:28:26,371
- Really?
- [Jeff] Oh, blessing in disguise? You tell me how.
651
00:28:26,496 --> 00:28:28,999
I've never been entirely
happy with this painting.
652
00:28:29,124 --> 00:28:32,294
He didn't really capture
the luster of your skin.
653
00:28:32,419 --> 00:28:34,713
Or, or the sparkle in your eyes.
654
00:28:34,838 --> 00:28:36,340
The sparkle in her eyes.
655
00:28:36,465 --> 00:28:37,965
Now I realize it.
656
00:28:38,508 --> 00:28:41,136
A blessing in disguise.
657
00:28:41,261 --> 00:28:43,388
Okay. Thank you.
658
00:28:44,139 --> 00:28:46,099
- [Susie] Let's eat.
- Let's eat.
659
00:28:49,061 --> 00:28:50,896
[Milos] So, Larry, we
almost finished here.
660
00:28:51,021 --> 00:28:53,482
You got-- You're two-thirds
done already. It's incredible.
661
00:28:53,607 --> 00:28:56,360
Plus, I have extra boards for you.
662
00:28:56,485 --> 00:28:58,612
I take it to your house and
fix your pantry like new.
663
00:28:58,737 --> 00:29:00,364
- No charge.
- What?
664
00:29:00,489 --> 00:29:02,241
- Believe me, I'm gonna pay you.
- Larry, I take care of you.
665
00:29:02,366 --> 00:29:04,409
I can take the
stuff to your house right now.
666
00:29:06,036 --> 00:29:09,331
Ha.
Mrs. Greene.
667
00:29:09,456 --> 00:29:12,501
She make bad recommendation all
over town about my business.
668
00:29:12,626 --> 00:29:14,044
- What?
- Yes.
669
00:29:14,169 --> 00:29:15,712
- Oh, my God.
- Remember? I make mahogany cream?
670
00:29:15,837 --> 00:29:16,922
- Yes.
- I work so hard?
671
00:29:17,047 --> 00:29:18,632
- Yes.
- I make it nice?
672
00:29:18,757 --> 00:29:20,509
- I know.
- And what she do? She ruined my name.
673
00:29:20,634 --> 00:29:23,762
Oh, she's terrible.
No friend of the working man.
674
00:29:23,887 --> 00:29:25,514
Okay. Larry, listen,
675
00:29:25,639 --> 00:29:28,558
I can go right now. I take
the boards to your house,
676
00:29:28,684 --> 00:29:31,311
- and I make it fast.
- Great idea.
677
00:29:43,282 --> 00:29:46,743
...mahogany cream!
678
00:29:46,868 --> 00:29:51,456
...mahogany cream!
679
00:29:52,624 --> 00:29:54,668
I mean, the whole thing
was just a series
680
00:29:54,793 --> 00:29:56,837
of unfortunate misunderstandings.
681
00:29:56,962 --> 00:29:58,255
That wasn't Harvey Weinstein.
682
00:29:58,380 --> 00:30:00,716
That was Jeff Greene, my manager.
683
00:30:00,841 --> 00:30:03,427
I guess the culture's just
sort of changing, and...
684
00:30:03,552 --> 00:30:05,345
- Hmm. Yeah.
- ...um, we're
685
00:30:05,470 --> 00:30:08,807
- defining our boundaries more.
- Boundaries. Boundaries. Yes.
686
00:30:08,932 --> 00:30:11,435
And personal space, like
for instance, my tattoo.
687
00:30:11,560 --> 00:30:13,603
You don't get to demand
to know what it's about,
688
00:30:13,729 --> 00:30:15,605
- because it's on my body.
- [Larry] No, of course not. Of course not.
689
00:30:15,731 --> 00:30:19,026
I, I'm not that guy. I know who
you think-- I'm not that guy.
690
00:30:19,151 --> 00:30:22,195
- Okay.
- We don't need lawyers or anything like that.
691
00:30:22,321 --> 00:30:25,324
Come back to work.
Bring Bogey. I miss Bogey.
692
00:30:25,449 --> 00:30:27,701
I miss that little doggy.
693
00:30:27,826 --> 00:30:30,537
- [Larry] I'll bring him five bowls, okay?
- Okay.
694
00:30:30,662 --> 00:30:32,998
If we can go back with
like a mutual respect
695
00:30:33,123 --> 00:30:34,958
and honesty, um...
696
00:30:35,083 --> 00:30:36,668
- [Alice] I really appreciate your openness.
- [Ted] That's funny.
697
00:30:36,793 --> 00:30:39,546
You know, this is how
culture moves forward.
698
00:30:39,671 --> 00:30:41,840
- Yeah.
- What are you doing?
699
00:30:41,965 --> 00:30:44,509
- I'm side-sitting.
- You can't side-sit with me.
700
00:30:44,634 --> 00:30:46,636
No, no. Wait. Where are you going?
Stay here just one second.
701
00:30:46,762 --> 00:30:48,013
- Oh, my God.
- Sit quiet.
702
00:30:48,138 --> 00:30:49,514
- Let go! Oh, my God.
- [Ted] Huh.
703
00:30:52,351 --> 00:30:53,852
Hmm?
704
00:30:54,728 --> 00:30:57,272
All right.
You're all right.
705
00:30:57,397 --> 00:31:00,734
Let go of me! I came
here with an open mind.
706
00:31:00,859 --> 00:31:02,944
- No, no, I--
- You don't get to grab me,
707
00:31:03,070 --> 00:31:05,572
- at a banquette or side-sit!
- No, I had to side-sit.
708
00:31:05,697 --> 00:31:07,282
I had to side-sit because...
709
00:31:07,407 --> 00:31:08,867
I had to side-sit because I--
710
00:31:08,992 --> 00:31:11,203
Aah, what are you--
No, Alice!
711
00:31:13,622 --> 00:31:15,374
Hey, uh...
712
00:31:15,499 --> 00:31:16,750
How'd those test results turn out?
713
00:31:16,875 --> 00:31:18,210
You know, everybody here is
really pulling for you.
714
00:31:18,335 --> 00:31:21,171
Oh, they turned out just fine.
Thank you very much.
715
00:31:22,005 --> 00:31:23,799
What a blessing.
716
00:31:27,427 --> 00:31:29,971
So Victor and Sammi want to buy
a house. What do you think?
717
00:31:30,097 --> 00:31:31,515
We give 'em a down payment.
718
00:31:31,640 --> 00:31:33,809
Is that too generous?
You know, I never know.
719
00:31:34,643 --> 00:31:37,479
Wait a minute, wait a minute.
Slow down, slow down, slow down.
720
00:31:37,604 --> 00:31:39,398
What the fuck?
721
00:31:39,523 --> 00:31:43,026
Larry, what the hell did
you do to my picture?
722
00:31:43,151 --> 00:31:45,779
Oh, my God!
It was beautiful,
723
00:31:45,904 --> 00:31:48,323
and it's all destroyed!
724
00:31:48,448 --> 00:31:50,367
You piece of shit, Larry!
725
00:31:50,492 --> 00:31:54,538
You piece of fucking
turd nothing! Fuck you!
726
00:31:54,663 --> 00:31:56,456
Asshole!
727
00:31:56,581 --> 00:31:58,291
[Lucy] Mr. David.
728
00:31:58,417 --> 00:32:01,169
Did you ask Ms. Huff
inappropriate questions
729
00:32:01,294 --> 00:32:03,588
about her relationship
with her dog, Bogey?
730
00:32:04,005 --> 00:32:06,675
- I guess that all depends on--
- Wait. Objection. Relevance.
731
00:32:06,800 --> 00:32:09,302
When she asked you to stop asking
questions about her tattoo,
732
00:32:09,428 --> 00:32:11,054
did you respect her wishes?
733
00:32:11,179 --> 00:32:14,182
I was very curious about it.
There's a guy with one eye.
734
00:32:14,307 --> 00:32:16,810
I thought it might have been
Mr. Clean.
735
00:32:17,853 --> 00:32:19,312
Do you have any idea?
736
00:32:19,855 --> 00:32:22,065
I have no further questions
for the witness.
737
00:32:22,190 --> 00:32:23,817
- You may go.
- Thank you.
738
00:32:23,942 --> 00:32:26,027
Okay. I actually just
have a couple, Lucy.
739
00:32:26,153 --> 00:32:27,446
Mr. David, the answers
you're giving today
740
00:32:27,571 --> 00:32:28,989
are your sworn testimony,
isn't that right?
741
00:32:29,114 --> 00:32:31,450
- Mm-hmm.
- You came here of your own volition,
742
00:32:31,575 --> 00:32:32,909
- voluntarily?
- I did.
743
00:32:33,034 --> 00:32:34,327
Because you want the truth to be known.
744
00:32:34,453 --> 00:32:36,872
- Absolutely.
- I just have one question.
745
00:32:38,290 --> 00:32:40,083
Did you...
746
00:32:41,168 --> 00:32:43,628
use my bathroom?
747
00:32:44,921 --> 00:32:47,716
- No.
- [Roger] I grow tired of asking, Mr. David.
748
00:32:47,841 --> 00:32:49,718
And I remind you, you're under oath.
749
00:32:49,843 --> 00:32:54,514
Did you or did you not use my bathroom?!
58848
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